01x33 - Eggman the Auteur

[bunniefuu]

Grrr!

Tails, I need jumper cables.

You got any duct tape?

-How about a battery?
-Anti-matter? Self-generating?

I don't know.
Something with a lot of juice.

Anti-matter is on the top shelf
behind the video games.

Thanks.

Ha! Initiate
Spinning Blades of Death!

Spinning Blades of Death?
I guess that sounds safe.

Woo-hoo-hoo!

Activating hyper mode.

Yeah!

-[bleep]
-Oh. Sonic here.

Sonic, did you return the book
I lent you to the library?

Um, not yet.

[Knuckles] Aargh!

It's due today.

If you don't return it on time
I'll have to pay late fees.

Late fees!

Slam on your worry brakes, Amy,
I'm all over this.

Not a problem.

Problem. I can't remember
where the book is.

When I can't find something,
I retrace my steps.

OK, what did I do yesterday?

Oh, yeah,
that's where I left it.

-Got it!
-Nice.

But why didn't you take it
straight to the library?

Because you helped me
track it down

so you must share
the glory of this victory.

And I didn't think of that.

I feel glorious. And victorious.

Now get going. The library
closes in... seven minutes.

Plenty of time. Not a problem.

I feel glorious too.
No, wait, that's nauseous.

Seven minutes? I'll get this
to the library in ten seconds.

I'll have six minutes
seconds

to eat a chilli dog, relax
on the beach and read a book.

Which I'll no longer have.
But still.

After you.

No, please. After you.

I have
all the time in the world.

I thought the same thing
when I was your age, sonny.

Did I ever tell you
about the time

I got a soda
out of the vending machine

without putting money in?

Uh, no, we just met.

Oh, it was
the best day of my life.

-Going fishing?
-For aliens.

I dreamt about badminton
and teacups last night.

And you know what that means?

Let's pretend that I don't.

It means aliens are coming

or I'm going
to a badminton tea party.

But I'm not taking any chances.

Well, good luck with that.

Don't mind if I do!

Actually,
I'm not sure what I want.

There are
so many choices.

Should I have a Meh Burger,

or a Meh Burger with cheese,

or a double Meh Burger, or a
double Meh Burger with cheese,

or a Super Meh Burger, or a
Super Meh Burger with cheese?

I know...

I'll have a hot dog.

But should I have
a hot dog with sauerkraut,

or a hot dog with onions,

or a hot dog with mustard,
or a hot dog with...

How about a chilli dog?

Actually,
a chilli dog sounds delicious.

Would you like
something to drink with that?

Something to drink? Hmm.

Should I have a soda or a water
or a shake or a juice...

Juice. Have juice.
Everyone loves juice.

I'll have juice.

-Would you like to have...
-He doesn't want anything else!

[engine revs]

You cut in front of Motobug.

He held my place while I was
in the little villains' room.

Sorry, Egghead.
I didn't see him. Go ahead.

No, no, please.
You're Sonic the Hedgehog.

You deserve to be next.
Go on. I insist.

Well, I am in kind of a hurry.
Thanks, Egghead.

One chilli dog, please.

I'd like a chilli dog
with extra relish.

Sorry, we're sold out.

[Sonic gulps]

Want a bite?

No, I don't want a bite.
I want my own.

We have some at the warehouse
two villages over.

[sighs]

Be right back.

Did I ever tell you about
the time I got a free soda?

Yes!

There it is.

Do you mind if I go first?

Did I ever tell you
about the time

I found some money
on the street?

You got to be...
No, we just met.

I used the money to buy a soda,

so it was like
the soda was free.

I wish I liked soda.

I asked for extra relish.

You got me thinking, sonny.

Today's the day!

I'm headed home
to drink my soda.

Aha!

Gotcha, alien!

You're not an alien.

Really? You think?

Get me out of here, Sticks!

Um, OK.
Which one was it again?

You got to be kidding me.

[groans]

You're welcome!

Plenty of time.

Oh, come on!

Huh! I need a straw.

Sonic! Sonic!

I have a flat tyre
and I'm late to feed my children.

Can you help me fix it?

Um, I have a book to return,
then I'll come back, I promise.

Two minutes, tops.

Oh, that's OK. Growing children
don't need nutrition.

It just keeps them healthy

and stops their bones
from getting brittle.

I'll just fix this flat myself.

My sciatica's flaring up,

but I'm sure I'll only be
laid up for a week or so.

You go return your book

while I struggle painfully
and injure myself.

[groans]

Done!

Book, please.

Eat this, you line-cutting,
relish-forgetting rodent.

I ran to the warehouse
and got you a chilli dog.

Doesn't that count for anything?

No! You ruined
my chilli dog moment.

OK, fine, I'm happy
to battle you over this,

but can I return
this library book first?

I'll show you exactly the same
consideration you showed me.

None! None consideration!

All this over a chilli dog?

It's the principle!

I'm sure you'll think twice
about cutting in line next time.

Did someone get pushed
to the back of the line

one too many times
in elementary school?

It was middle school,
and those girls were vicious.

Minions, att*ck!

Sonic! We got your back!

Still plenty of time
to get to the library.

OK, where's the book?

You mean my book?

The one you were returning,
that you said was not a problem.

I still have seconds.
We're fine.

Give me that!

But... pictures.

See? And ten seconds to spare.

We're closed.

You're not.
There's seven seconds left.

I closed early.

I'm taking my assistant to get
some of those chilli dogs.

Chilli dogs?

Thanks, Egghead.

Told you
I'd get it here on time.