01x39 - Battle of the Boy Bands

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Sonic Boom". November 8, 2014 - October 4, 2017.*
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Sonic and friends Tails, Knuckles, Amy and Sticks tries to ward off the evil plans of Dr. Eggman who is taking over the world.
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01x39 - Battle of the Boy Bands

Post by bunniefuu »

Grrr!

[beeping]

An incoming Eggman att*ck!
Better get the g*ng together.

United Village Defenders
of the Village, unite!

-On my way!
-Let's move!

I'm on it!

It's really not a good time
for me. I kind of have plans.

-What?
-Seriously, Knuckles...

What do you mean
you have other plans?

I was gonna catch a movie
with Mike.

-Hi, I'm Mike.
-Uh, yeah. Hi.

But we've got to get moving.
Eggman's attacking.

But today's the last day
of Jungle Fighter III:

Revenge of the Jungle Fighter.

Jungle Fighter can wait. It is
important to battle Eggman.


-Great! See? Let's go.
-So where are we going?

Oh, uh,
I meant me and Knuckles.

-Why can't he come?
-Yeah, why can't I come?

We can't bring you to a battle.
I mean, you're... just a guy.

-[all gasp]
-Just a guy?

No, I didn't...
What I meant to say was...

He's not... you know...

I think
you've said enough already.

We don't have time for this.

I can't believe
you said that to Mike.

What did he say?

Uh... battle's over here, guys.

He called my friend Mike
"just a guy".

-[both gasp]
-Huh! Sonic, how could you?

I didn't mean...

Yeah, Sonic. That's
a crummy thing to say to a dude.

[groans]

Well, got to go.

You know I'm right.

Don't worry, Sonic,
this'll all blow over.

By tomorrow nobody will
even remember what you said.

It's been hours

since Sonic the Hedgehog's
infamous "just a guy" comment

shook the very foundation
of our fair village.

I'm here now with an angry mob.

[shouting]

Sonic barged in
and called Mike "just a guy",

as if to say he was so much
better than the rest of us.

We begged him to stop but
he kept berating the poor fella.

That Sonic,
living it up on the beach.

He's lost touch
with the common man.

Can you believe that guy?
I mean, the nerve of some people.

Can I get a chilli dog?

Oh, jeez,
that sure sounds complicated.

Can you really trust me
with that order?

After all, I'm just a guy.

[groans]

All I did was call him a guy.
Is that guy not a guy?

It's not what you said, Sonic,
it's how you said it.

But the town will forgive you
if they see you making an effort

to change your condescending,
insensitive attitude.

Lucky for you, I happen to teach
a sensitivity training seminar

every weekday morning
am to pm

and there's enough open spots
in the class for all of you.

[all sigh]

Not cool, Sonic.

I still don't get why we have
to do all this stupid training

just because of
Sonic's big dumb mouth.

-[whistle]
-Uh-uh-uh. Insensitive remark.

This training's not stupid.

Now, how are everyone's
sensitivity hats coming along?

[groans]

When you feel frustrated,

instead of lashing out
at someone else,

close your eyes,
take a deep breath

and go to your happy place.

Let's practise that.

That'll teach you
to team up with alien overlords,

you robo-trash.

Now I realise
that even though on the outside

I was hitting my sidekick
with a mallet,

on the inside
I was hitting myself

with a mallet
of my own insecurities.

[sobs]

It's OK, bro.
I like to hit things too.

[sniffs] Sonic, would you care
to share with the group?

I don't know.

I guess I could be more mindful
of people's feelings and stuff.

And...
maybe I'll go talk to Mike.

Tell him I'm sorry.

[all] Ohh!

All right, bring it in.

Listen, Mike, I was wrong
to say you're just a guy.

-And?
-And I'll never do it again.

And?

And you're welcome to come
to the next battle with Eggman.

Apology accepted.
Can we go now?

We must wait
until Eggman launches an att*ck.

-How about now?
-No, see...

So... now? Let's go now.

[inhales]
Just go to your happy place.

Just go to your happy place.

[sighs]

What's this, your happy place?
When's the battle? Now?

[groans then inhales]

[sighs]

What's this, your happier place?

Cool. So can we go
to the battle now?

-[groans]
-[beeping]

What?

Oops. One too many.

[beeping]

[Tails] Incoming att*ck
from Eggman.


-OK. Now.
-Hold on a minute.

[groans]

Behold. My latest invention.

-Agh!
-Ugh!

Oh, boy. That's not good.

How could you
take that fella to a battle?

He's not like you, Sonic.
He's just a guy.

Wait. I only took him to the battle
because you people...

[all gasp]

You people?

[groans]

Perhaps our enthusiasm yesterday
was a bit premature.

As it turns out,

some people still have a long
way to go in their training.

But I'm sure that we'll all
learn to be compassionate

after tomorrow's sensitivity
training camping trip!

[all except Sonic cheer]


You know what I think
is compassionate?

Saving the village from Eggman
every week.

But do I get any props for that?
No.

Everyone just goes around
gasping at me

when I call a guy "a guy"
or people "people".

[all gasp]

I quit heroing
and I quit this stupid group!

[laughs]

Sonic the Hedgehog? Retired?

Yeah, and the rest
of his do-gooder friends

are going on
some lovey-dovey camping trip.

The town is ours
for the taking.

Wait, didn't we try this
once before already?

No, that was
when Eggman retired.

This time Sonic's retiring.
Totally different thing.

[all cheer]

Sounds like an opportunity
to launch an offensive.

Yeah,
and you should att*ck too.

If I do that, Sonic will come
out of retirement and fight me.

I'll need to bide my time.

Wait for just the right moment.

Ah, do nothing at all.

It's that kind of evil scheme

that keeps you feared
around the globe.

[chuckles]

But it's already
a juice container.

Why dirty a glass?

[chuckling]

And tomatoes on the side,
please.

[chuckles]

Sonic, you have to do something

about
the Lightning Bolt Society.

Oh, whatever.

I've eaten burritos
more dangerous than them.

Sorry, guys. I'm retired.

Well, well,
look what we have here. A fence.

Trying to dictate
where we can and cannot go.

Oh, yeah.
Anarchy, baby! Woo-hoo!

[all cheer]

[sheep bleat]

[shrieking]

[shrieking]

So much for early retirement.

My baby! Again.
Somebody save my baby! Again.

[wails then gurgles]

Now, this feels
like the right moment.

He'll never see me coming.

-Sonic, look out! It's Eggman.
-Huh?

Oh!

-[bleating]
-Argh!

What the heck is that?

Can't see anything!
What's going on?

[cheering]

We were wrong about you, Sonic.

You are better than us.

Thank you
for saving the village.

And my baby. Again.

I knew
if we left you alone long enough

you'd step up and save the day.

I appreciate you taking partial
credit for my heroics, Amy,

but someone actually
deserves my thanks... Mike.

Without his help, I never would
have seen Eggman coming.

You're more than just a guy,
Mike. You're a hero.

Oh. Neat-o.

Oh, man, we thought
we were the baddest in town

but then Eggman showed up
with his claw doodad...

I appreciate what you're trying
to do but you're not good at it.

Yeah, you're not good at it.

[groans] And I suppose
you people could do better?

[all gasp]

Let's see
those sensitivity hats, boys.
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