Ladies and gentlemen,
we now ask for
your complete attention.
If you want to sing,
laugh, clap,
cry, yawn, boo or fart,
please, do it in your head,
only in your head.
You are now kindly requested
to keep silent
and to hold your breath until
the very end of the show.
Breathing will not be tolerated
during the show.
So, please take a deep,
last breath right now.
Thank you.
Underneath the moonlight
My good friend Pierrot
Ah, ah.
♪ ♪
Nastya, it's going to start.
So...
may we start?
So may we start?
High time to start
One, two, three, four!
So may we start?
- So may we start?
- So may we start?
It's time to start
- High time to start
- High time to start
They hope that it goes the way
- It's supposed to go
- It's supposed to go
There's fear in them all
but they can't let it show
They're underprepared
but that may be enough
The budget is large
but still it's not enough
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
It's time to start
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
High time to start
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
We've fashioned a world,
a world
Built just for you
A tail of songs and fury
- With no taboo
- With no taboo
We'll sing and die for you
- Yes, in minor keys
- Yes, in minor keys
And if you want us
to k*ll, too
- We may agree
- We may agree
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
It's time to start
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
High time to start
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
So close all the doors
and let's begin the show
The exits are clearly marked
Thought you should know
The authors are here
so let's not show disdain
The authors are here
And they're a little vain
A little vain
Now...
The music resounds
and all the flames are lit
So, ladies and gents,
please shut up and sit
The curtain of our eyelids
Lazily rise
But where's the stage,
you wonder
Is it
Outside
Or is it within?
- Outside? Within?
- Outside? Within?
Outside? Within?
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
It's time to start
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
High time to start
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
So may we start?
May we start, may we,
may we now start?
- It's time to start
- May we start
May we, may we now start?
- High time to start
- May we start
May we, may we now start?
Don't try to start.
- May we now start
- OFFICER: Don't try to start.
- May we now start
- May we now start
May we now start
- Bye, Henry.
- Bye, Henry.
May we now start
Bye, Henry.
Good luck!
Bye-bye. Bye.
- Bye, Ann.
- Bye, Ann.
Bon voyage.
- Bon voyage.
- Bye.
- Bye-bye.
- Bye.
Bye-bye.
RUSSELL and CHORUS BOYS:
True love always finds
Always finds
- A way
- A way
- Afraid
- But true love often goes
- Afraid
- Astray
Astray
♪ ♪
True love always finds
Always finds
- A way
- A way
But true love often goes
Often goes
Astray, astray
Come on! Come on, Henry!
Henry! Henry! Henry!
- Henry, I love you!
- Henry! Henry!
Yes, laugh, laugh, laugh.
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
One, two, three, four, five,
Six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Are you ready?
- Yeah!
- No.
No one is ever ready for
a mildly offensive evening
with...
The Ape of God.
Here for his triumphant
new show,
the world infamous
Henry McHenry!
♪ ♪
Love you, Henry!
Oh, this smoke sh*t.
What is this f*cking smoke
supposed to mean anyway?
I think I'm getting
allergic to it.
Wish they'd use
laughing gas instead.
Would make my life easier.
Or even better,
cyanide gas.
So... I'm here to make
you laugh tonight.
Yes, laugh, laugh, laugh.
I'm not sure
I can do it tonight.
Not sure I should even try.
Making people laugh
is a disgusting...
...deceitful trick anyway.
Yes. Why should I activate
Your ventromedial
prefrontal cortex
So your 15 facial muscles
will contract
So your f*cking
zygomatic muscle will react
While your epiglottis
half-closes your larynx
Clap
Yes, why the f*ck should I?
Why should I make you...
HENRY and CHORUS GIRLS:
Laugh, laugh, laugh
But don't make me,
don't make me, don't make me
Can't stand to hear you
Laugh, laugh, laugh
'Cause you bore me,
you bore me, you bore me
I'll still make you
Gasp, gasp, gasp
But don't worry, don't worry,
don't worry
You probably will not
Choke, choke, choke
Kick the bucket, kick
the bucket, kick the bucket
Kick the bucket
Huh.
Well, of course,
I've heard the rumors, too.
They say my show kills.
But relax, see my contract?
Save your breath.
Says so here:
"Mr. Henry McHenry
is not allowed
to make the public
laugh to death."
Can't make your alveoli
pop tonight.
No dislocated jaws,
no belly explosions.
However, asthmatics,
Keep your inhalers in position!
- Okay?
- Okay!
- Ready?
- Ready!
Laugh.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha,
ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha-ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha,
ha-ha-ha-ha
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha,
ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha-ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha,
ha-ha-ha-ha
Okay, shut up.
♪ ♪
Yes.
Why did I become a comedian?
Why did I
become a comedian?
To entertain some balding men?
To bring a touch of levity
to tragic times?
Not me.
To bring some joy
to those who have none?
To cast a skeptical eye
toward common knowledge?
Uh-uh. -: Why did I
become a comedian?
To make you notice what you've
always surely noticed,
never noticing you noticed
until I ask you:
- "Have you ever noticed?"
- Why did I become a comedian?
- Sure, but not only that.
- Why did I become a comedian?
To convey with a smile
these deep-seated feelings
of hatred and humiliation
we all seem to be sharing?
When...
All the Catholics
hate the Muslims
And the Muslims
hate the Catholics
And the Tutsis hate the Hutus
And... everybody
hates the Jews
- So, why, Henry?
- Yes, why, Henry?
Why?
Yes, why did you
become a comedian?
- For the money?
- For the money?
Oh, no, no.
No, I've come from poverty
and severity
and now have reached big money
and obscenity.
So why did you become
a comedian?
- For the fame?
- For the fame?
Oh, no, no.
Though fame is like a flame,
glorious,
superfluous.
So nice being famous
for being infamous.
Okay, but why did you become
a comedian?
- Fear of death?
- Fear of death?
Oh, no, no.
'Cause you see, I have sympathy
for the abyss.
What did he say?
What is "abyss"?
A-B-Y-S-S!
You illiterates.
That's why I must never...
never cast my eyes
towards the abyss.
♪ ♪
Lady, that's quite an abyss
you've got.
So why, why did you become
a comedian?
For the women?
Oh, no, well...
Okay, let me explain.
You see...
my serial p*ssy days are over.
Because, well...
I've, I've just met someone.
Someone so...
It all went so fast.
I just moved into her tiny
hidden palace,
'cause, yes, she's a queen.
And now,
I'm engaged.
I know, I know.
Marrying a girl when you're
as young and green as me,
it's like...
swimming the Atlantic
with a concrete block
tied to your left testicle.
Well, yes, now, I'm engaged.
Copped out in my early age.
So who, you ask, would marry me?
Who would be the least likely?
No, this ain't a joke so far:
- Yes, Ann Defrasnoux,
- WOMAN: Oh, no!
The opera star.
What?
What's wrong, lady?
Ann and me, you disagree?
What is it, blasphemy?
Why, is she too...
perfect?
Yes, yes, yes
And I, some loathsome insect?
Yes, yes, yes
Okay, I'll accept that.
First time I fell in love...
...woke up next to the girl...
...rushed out to buy myself
the biggest motorbike
I could find
and escaped
fast and far.
But Ann the soprano
has changed me.
I have changed.
How?
I'm still not sure.
Time will tell.
What I see in her
is obvious.
What she sees in me,
hmm...
it's a little more puzzling.
♪ ♪
Wish that she could
be here now
But she's at
the opera tonight
Opera, where everything
is sacred
Amen!
First she dies
and dies and dies
And then she bows
and bows and bows
She'll be bowing now till dawn
Ann, dear, I love you so
But all that bowing's got to go
Take a last bow, enough
Make it seem more off the cuff
But, Henry, you didn't answer:
why?
Yes, why did you
become a comedian?
So, why did you become
a comedian?
Yes, why did you
become a comedian?
Hey, Henry?!
Why?
I'll tell you why.
To disarm people.
Make them laugh.
It's the only way I know
to tell the truth
without getting k*lled.
Anyway, every f*ckin'...
Oh, sh*t.
Henry, you bastard!
Ooh.
f*ck you, Henry!
See, I, too, can die.
And then...
bow.
Okay, well,
that's it for tonight.
Oh, no, no, no!
Oh, yes, yes, 'cause I'm sick
and tired of making you...
Laugh, laugh, laugh
But don't leave me, don't
leave me, don't leave me
Can't bear to hear you
Laugh, laugh, laugh
'Cause you bore me,
you bore me, you bore me
But I need to hear you
Clap, clap, clap
Yes, I'm cocky,
I'm cocky, I'm cocky
Want each one of you to
Clap, clap, clap
Like a loony, like a loony,
like a loony, like a loony
We promised that you'd laugh
We promised
that you'd laugh
We promised that you'd laugh,
laugh, laugh, laugh
Laugh, laugh, laugh
'Cause he's Henry,
he's Henry, The Henry
He didn't make you
choke, choke, choke
Or kick the bucket, kick the
bucket, kick the bucket
He needs to hear you
Clap, clap, clap
'Cause he's Henry,
he's Henry, The Henry
Wants each of you
to clap, clap, clap
So let's hear it,
let's hear it
Let's hear it, let's hear it!
Ann, we love you!
- Ann, please, look this way.
- Ann, please.
Give us a smile!
Over this way! Over this way!
- Ann, you're looking great!
- Thank you!
How did the show go?
I k*lled them...
destroyed them...
m*rder*d them.
Good boy.
And your gig?
I...
I saved them.
Well, you die so magnificently.
Honey, you're always dying.
Ann, Henry, how about a smile?
- Over here!
- How 'bout a smile, Ann?
- Give us a smile, Ann!
- How 'bout a smile, please!
Give us a smile, please!
Henry, please
In the frame, in the frame
Henry
Helmet off, Henry
In the frame, Henry
Helmet off, Henry
- How 'bout a smile, please
- How 'bout a smile, please
- Give us a smile, please
- Give us a smile, please
Henry. your helmet
- How 'bout a smile, please
- Take off your helmet!
Give us a smile, please.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
We love each other so much
We love each other so much
We're scoffing at logic
This wasn't the plan
We love each other so much
We love each other so much
We love each other so much
Counterintuitive, baby
And yet we remain
We love each other so much
Counterintuitive, baby
And yet we remain
We love each other so much
We love each other so much
We love each other so much
So hard to explain it
So hard to explain
We love each other so much.
♪ ♪
We love each other so much
We love each other
So much
Speak soft when you say it
Speak soft when you say
We love each other so much
Speak soft when you say it
Speak soft when you say
We love each other so much
- So much, so much
- So much, so much
- So much
- So much
- So much, so much
- So much, so much
- So much, so much, so much
- So much, so much, so much.
Tickling time.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
Henry.
No, no, no.
Henry, please, not my feet.
Not my feet! Ah!
Stop it!
- Tied the knot
- Connie O'Connor here
- Tied the knot...
- for "Show Bizz News,"
bringing you the latest
on Ann and Henry's
whirlwind romance.
The two stars, both at the
pinnacle of their careers,
have officially tied the knot.
Tied the knot.
♪ ♪
I'm an accompanist,
I'm an accompanist.
I'm an accompanist for Ann,
for Ann.
Ann's the one with the genius,
the grace.
I'm the one with
the technical expertise.
Ah, the tease, ah, the tease
of being so near, so far
from the star...
from the stars.
But someday
I'll join them 'cause
I'm a conductor,
I'm a conductor,
I'm a conductor,
conductor at heart.
It's a temp job I'm doing.
This should only be seen
as a means to an end.
In the end, in the end
I'll lead orchestras,
Near and far.
Every bar, every bar
will bear my own signature,
but I'm an accompanist
for the present
for Ann.
That's what I do.
I'm an accompanist.
For the present.
For Ann.
But now,
let's listen to her sing.
There's a chill in the air
On this night
Where is the moon
Where is the starlight?
Bearings lost, we're adrift
On this night
Where is the moon
Where is the starlight
Tonight?
Afraid, don't know why
Where is the moonlight?
Afraid, don't know why
Where is the starlight?
Afraid, 'fraid of you
Something about the look
In your eyes
Hurry, dawn
I need help, I need light
Cut short the night
I am in danger
Though I thought
that I knew him
I'm wrong
I don't know him
He is a stranger
Tonight
Afraid, don't know why
Where is the moonlight?
Afraid, don't know why
Where is the starlight?
Afraid, 'fraid of you
Something about the look
In your eyes
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
- Hi.
- Hi.
♪ ♪
I am love
A fickle thing,
a finite thing
I am love
Do not approach me
♪ ♪
I was love
A gruesome thing,
a gruesome thing
I was love
And now I'm dying
Dying, dying, dying, dying
Dy... ing
♪ ♪
Newborn girl
And, in "Show Bizz News,"
anonymous sources report
that the singing and laughter
around the Defrasnoux-McHenry
household
will soon be drowned out
by the cries
of a newborn girl.
Newborn girl.
sh*t.
Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
Breathe in, breathe out,
breathe in
Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
Breathe in, breathe out,
breathe in
Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
Breathe in, breathe out,
breathe in
Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
Push, Ann, push, Ann
That's it
Push, Ann, push, Ann
That's it
Push, Ann, push, Ann
That's it
- That's it
- That's it
Doctor, am I doing everything...
right?
Yes, Ann, yes.
Keep on laughing, that's great.
She's coming.
- She's coming!
- Breathe in, breathe out
- Push, push, push, push,
push, Ann -Breathe in
- Breathe in, breathe out,
breathe in -That's it
- Breathe in, breathe out
- Push, push, push, push
- Breathe in
- Push, Ann
- Breathe in, breathe out,
breathe in -That's it
- Breathe in, breathe out
- Push, push, push, push
- Breathe in
- Push, Ann
- Breathe in, breathe out,
breathe in -That's it
- That's it -Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
- That's it -Breathe in,
breathe out, breathe in
She's almost there.
sh*t, Ann.
She seems completely naked.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Laugh. Laugh, Ann, laugh.
Great, Ann. Keep on laughing.
- Laugh, laugh, laugh.
- Yes, Ann.
DOCTOR and NURSES:
There she is.
She's out of this world
Out of this world
Welcome to the world, Annette
She's out of this world
Out of this world
Welcome to the world, Annette
- She's out of this world
- Out of this world
Welcome to the world, Annette
- She's out of this world
- Out of this world
Welcome to the world, Annette.
♪ ♪
This is a baby.
This is my baby.
Tonight,
while she's singing and dying,
I'm baby... sitting.
Sitting, sitting, sitting.
Dy... ing.
Something's about to break
But it isn't clear
Is it something we should cheer?
Is it something
we should fear?
Something's about to break
But it isn't clear
Is it something we should cheer?
Is it something
we should fear?
Something's about to break
But it isn't clear
Is it something we should cheer?
Is it something
we should fear?
Crews faced
a major battle yesterday
in Simi Valley,
northwest of Los Angeles,
where flames came
dangerously close
to the Ronald Reagan
Presidential Library
and to nearby neighborhoods...
Oscar,
I feel like sleeping now.
Please wake me up
before we get there.
Sure.
Judy, what do you see there?
Well, good morning.
This fire is raging right now.
You can see the vortex
of flames,
smoke and wind blowing
in our direction.
Imagine what it's like
for firefighters
to approach flames like that.
Despite an all-out as*ault,
the flames still managed
to jump the freeway,
forcing nearby neighborhoods
to be evacuated.
The fire quickly consumed
this barn,
where volunteers helped
rescue animals...
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Six women have come forward
Each with a similar story
Subjected
to Henry McHenry's abuses
Witnesses to his v*olence
Why now?
Why now?
Each of us has come forward
All with a similar story
Subjected to his abuses
Witnesses to his v*olence
And his anger, his anger
Six women have come forward
Each of us have come forward
- Each with a similar story
- All with a similar story
Subjected to his abuses
Witnesses to his v*olence
And his anger, his anger
But why? -Why only now?
- Why only now?
- Why come forward now?
- Yes, but why only now?
- Yes, why?
Why only now?
I, I fear for Ann
She must be warned
McHenry is not
Not what he seems
- So charming that I
- Why?
- A woman with sense
- Why come forward now?
I quickly became
A moth to a flame
A moth to a flame
- Six women have come forward
- Each of us have come forward
- Each with a similar story
- All with a similar story
Subjected to his abuses
Witnesses to his v*olence
And his anger, his anger
His anger
His anger
His anger!
The cause of this fire
has not yet been determined,
but Southern California Edison
utility
did say that it started near
one of their power lines
and they had not returned power
at the time the fire started.
All right.
Thank you very much...
(chorus singing
"Toreador Song" from "Carmen"
And now,
here in Vegas,
for the very first time...
The Ape of God,
Mr. Henry McHenry!
♪ ♪
Henry!
Whoo! Yeah!
Henry!
f*cking idiotic smoke.
Have you no sense
of proportions?!
Having to be funny here,
it's like...
...trying to enjoy a blow job
in a gas chamber.
Ah, man.
That was not funny, Henry.
You're right, not funny.
I'm so...
...too f*cking tired.
I knew it. I should've cancelled
the show tonight.
No, no, no!
Yes, yes, yes.
You see, my house was...
...broken into last night,
and, mm, bastards
stole all my jokes.
No, the truth is...
...now that I have
my own soprano
and baby...
...I'm not sure I have it
in me anymore
to make sad people laugh.
No, the truth is, this morning,
something happened.
I-I... No, no, I can't say.
No, the truth is I'm sick.
Being in love makes me sick.
Sick!
Well, the true truth is...
this morning...
I, um...
I k*lled... my wife.
What? What was that?
- Louder!
- Louder, Henry!
- Can't hear you back here.
- Your mic, Henry!
I k*lled my wife.
Yes, laugh, laugh, laugh.
Laugh, laugh, laugh.
So, I've said it:
I k*lled my wife.
I didn't mean to.
God knows I didn't mean to.
She woke up,
so beautiful.
♪ ♪- She looked at me and smiled.
That smile.
She is... was...
a very shy person, you see,
and I know,
I knew this shy smile
meant she wanted to f*ck.
But this time,
I pretended not to get it.
And I kept on pretending
and so she said it,
ever so shyly:
"Please, Henry.
f*ck me, Henry."
And I could see the effort
in her smile,
for her to ask that,
to say those dirty words,
to be wicked and bold,
so out of character.
With that very shy smile
I loved so much.
But I couldn't answer,
I couldn't meet her desire.
'Cause, yes,
being in love makes me sick.
Sick!
I had been sleepless
all night, you see,
suffocating,
suffocated by love.
A wreck.
Absolutely no desire left.
Come on, Henry, drop it, please!
Yeah.
What? Am I letting you know more
than you care to know about me?
Mm-hmm.
About her?
Sex?
Death?
Yes, no desire left.
Zero.
So I was looking for something,
anything to
change the subject,
to spare us both this horrible,
dreadful moment of rejection.
That's when the idea
came to me.
I remembered how extremely
ticklish she is... was...
especially on the soles
of her feet.
So I thought: I'll tickle her,
to change the subject.
So I grabbed her legs,
locked both of her feet
under my arms
and started to tickle them.
I could see in her eyes
she understood it all.
Why I was doing
what I was doing
to change the subject.
And it seemed impossible
she would laugh this time.
She was hurt.
And ashamed.
And sad and confused.
But I persisted,
I tickled gently...
"Stop it, Henry."
It wasn't working.
So I tickled stronger.
I tickled madly.
I tickled wild.
Ann?
Ann.
Ann? Ann!
No, no, no, Ann!
Ann!
Ann!
No!
No, Ann!
No!
I had tickled her to death.
I then tried to k*ll myself.
The same way, tickling myself.
You know, but it didn't work.
This is how I k*lled my wife.
Enough. I'm out.
You're sick!
That's f*cked up.
That was sick!
You're sick!
Poor Ann!
Poor Annette!
I sense some animosity.
Am I right, or is it me?
You must've bitten something
bitter in your cradle!
Bitten, bitter, cradle!
So why did I become a comedian?
You're not! You're not!
Not anymore!
So why did I become a comedian?
assh*le! assh*le!
Sick, sick, sick!
- assh*le!
- Okay.
- Go home!
- Ready?
Laugh!
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha,
ha-ha, ha-ha
Ha-ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha,
ha-ha-ha-ha
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha,
ha-ha, ha-ha
We promised that you'd laugh
We promised
that you'd laugh
We promised that you'd
laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh
Laugh, laugh, laugh
'Cause he's Henry, he's Henry...
Okay, everybody, thank you
very much, but enough already.
Have a good night!
Kick the bucket, kick the
bucket, kick the bucket
He needs to hear you
clap, clap, clap
'Cause he's Henry, he's Henry,
The Henry
You used to laugh
But now you sure ain't laughing
at me no more
You used to laugh
But now you sure ain't laughing
at me no more
What's your problem?
What's your f*cking problem?
What's your problem?
Your f*cking problem?
- Do you think I care?
- Henry, Henry, we've had enough
Do you think I care
what you all think of me now?
- Do you think I care?
- Henry, Henry, we've had enough
Do you think I care
what you wimps think of me now?
What's your problem?
What's your f*cking problem?
- What's your problem?
- Henry, Henry, we've had enough
- Your f*cking problem?
- Henry, Henry, we've had enough
My dear public
Get off, get off,
get off the stage
My dear public,
you f*cking headless beast
You're makin' me sick
Get off, get off,
get off the stage
- You ruthless
- Get off, get off
- Unpredictable beast
- Get off the stage
- It's your problem
- Get off, get off
- f*ck, it's not my problem
- Get off the stage
Get off, get off,
get off the stage
- It's your problem
- Get off, get off
- Get off the stage
- Your f*cking problem
Get off, get off,
get off the stage
Get off,
get off, get off the stage
Get off, get off,
get off the stage
Get off,
get off, get off the stage
- Well, you better laugh
- Get off, get off
Get off the stage
Or I'll get the hell
right off of this stage
- If you don't laugh
- Get off, get off
Get off the stage
- You gonna feel, feel, feel
- Get off, get off
- The fire of my rage
- Get off the stage
We used to laugh
f*ck off, f*ck off,
f*ck out of here
- f*ck off, f*ck off
- Until we wised up
- f*ck out of here
- Man, you're sick as they come
- f*ck off, f*ck off
- We used to laugh
f*ck out of here
- f*ck off, f*ck off
- But now we see you as you are
- f*ck out of here
- You are scum
- You got a problem
- What's your problem?
- A big old problem
- What's your f*cking problem?
- You got a problem
- You've got a problem
A big old problem
A big old pro...
...blem!
Ha, ha!
Ha, ha! Ha, ha!
Ha, ha, ha!
g*dd*mn it! f*cking damn it!
f*ck!
God, f*ck, damn it, f*ck!
Henry, I'm worried about you.
I'm worried.
There was a girl
From the middle of nowhere
Utterly plain
A little plump
She sang alone
In her bedroom
Wild acclaim
From those four walls
But she didn't want to be there
She didn't want to be there
She didn't want to be there
At all
She had the voice
Of a goddess
Strings, winds and horns
Inside her chest
Hour after hour
She would struggle
Till her voice became
Her royal realm
She wanted just to be there
Only wanted to live there
Really wanted to live there
Forever more
She headed west
The wild direction
No longer plain
No longer plump
The men were on her doorstep
Many men were on her doorstep
Her voice had brought her beauty
And set her free
But she never listened
to those men
Who came and whispered:
"You're a flame to me,
a flame to me
A flame to me, a flame to me"
She was a queen,
didn't need a king
Who'd put her brand-new palace
In jeopardy, in jeopardy,
in jeopardy
A queen should never
be a moth to a flame
♪ ♪
I have a wonderful gift,
and a beautiful child.
People adore me,
and I adore this man, but...
Something's wrong.
Annette.
♪ ♪
That's it, Annette.
Just keep right on walking
One foot then the other
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la, la-la,
la-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la, la-la,
la-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la, la-la
La-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la, la-la,
la-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la -
La, la-la-la, la-la,
la-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la, la-la,
la-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la, la-la,
la-la, la
La, la-la-la,
la-la, la-la, la
La, la-la-la...
Whoo!
What goes up
Must come down
My star's in decline
Hah!
Once profound
For a clown
My star's in decline.
Connie O'Connor here
for "Show Bizz News"
with exclusive news that Ann,
Henry and Baby Annette
will be travelling
on their yacht next week.
Could it be in the hope of
saving the couple's marriage?
And could the problems be due
in large part
to the growing discrepancy
between their
respective success?
Respective success,
respective success
- We wish them the best.
- We wish them the best.
A storm is rolling in,
a storm is rolling in
A storm is rolling in,
a storm is rolling in
A storm is rolling in, a storm
is rolling in
A storm is rolling in,
a storm is rolling in
A storm is rolling in
A storm is rolling in
A storm is rolling in
I will calm the sea
Baby, don't fear
I will stop the storm
Sleep, baby, sleep
The world revolves round you
My little innocent
Sleep a perfect sleep
I'm always here
Dream a perfect dream
And never fear
Thunder, rain nor lightning
My little innocent
All of the danger that I feel
I will dispel it
with some magic
Alakazam, I'll change the reel
Look at the happy family dancing
We'll look back and laugh
That crazy night
As we walk a path
Neath city lights
The lights will shine on you
My little innocent.
Henry!
Henry!
Henry, where are you?
Henry?
Henry?
Ann.
Are you drunk, Henry?
Whoa.
I'm not that drunk.
Let's waltz.
But I'll k*ll my voice out here.
Henry, a storm is rolling in.
I'm well aware of that, my dear.
Let's waltz in the storm!
A storm is rolling in,
a storm is rolling in
A storm is rolling in, a storm
is rolling in
Henry, you're drunk
- Henry, you're drunk
- A storm is rolling in
- I'm not that drunk
- A storm is rolling in
I'm not that drunk
Hey, where's Annette?
Where did she go?
Annette's asleep,
she's safe below
Henry, you're not the man I know
I'm not that drunk
I'm not that drunk,
I'm not that drunk
- I'm not that drunk
- Henry,
you're not the man I know.
We'll catch our death
in this rain.
Henry, stop fooling around.
We could slip, we could drown.
Whoa!
Henry, don't fool around
There's a storm, settle down
Careful, hey! What if we fell?
No one could survive
these swells -
You're quite drunk,
let's calm down
When we're safe,
you can be a clown
What has gotten into you?
What has gotten into you?
With this storm and this sea
I feel scared, look at me
Comfort me, hold me tight
Oh, what a terrible,
terrible night
My voice, Henry.
Is nothing sacred to you?
Oh, God knows
everything is to you.
Always trumpeting values
The sacred values
And then dying, dying
Dying!
And then bowing,
bowing, bowing
♪ ♪
Henry, stop it, stop it now!
We're gonna fall, gonna die!
What has gotten into you?
Think of Annette!
♪ ♪
Henry, help me! Pull me out!
Where are you? Help!
Henry, I'm almost out of air!
There's so little I can do
There's so little
I can do
There's so little I can do
There's so little
I can do
♪ ♪
There's so little I can do
There's so little I can do.
We gotta go, gotta go, gotta go.
♪ ♪
We washed ashore
Annette
On some island
Somewhere
Your mother's gone, Annette
I'll take care of you
Help is on the way
Annette
Someone's heard
Our calls
In the meantime
Stars line up
They line up for you
Somehow I'm imagining
Annette is singing.
Just as the light of the moon
lit her beautiful face.
How foolish.
How very foolish I can be.
Now, I can hear the...
stars laughing at me.
In the morning I'll be...
free of all these
hallucinations.
♪ ♪
I will haunt you, Henry
For the rest of your life
Through Annette, I'll haunt you
Her voice will be my ghost
I am no longer love
I am now revenge
♪ ♪
I will haunt you, Henry
I'll die day after day after day
I will haunt you, Henry
Night after night after night.
We are the police
and we have got
Some routine questions
You're not suspected, but
we have to ask some questions
It won't take long, how 'bout
some coffee with your questions?
It won't take long, we don't
have very many questions
Not many questions
Can you describe the night
and how your wife went missing?
There was a storm and I looked
up and she was missing
And did you try at all
to dive in and to save her?
The sea was rough, and with
Annette, how could I save her?
The storm was very strong,
there was no way to save her
And anyway, I had Annette,
I had to save her
I had Annette.
We heard the rumors
that you're somewhat of a raver
Were there some problems
between you that made you waver?
That is an insult, I loved Ann,
was always faithful
How 'bout that comic piece in
which you said you k*lled her?
Was that a prank or
something more, an aspiration?
Everybody knows my acts
are full of provocation
Well, that 'bout wraps it up,
we sure are grateful, Henry
It now seems clear to us
there is no guilty party
It was an act of God,
that is our firm conclusion
It was an act of God
And pardon the intrusion.
Yeah, that's him.
Sure, I've sinned
in all your eyes
But one thing you cannot deny is
I'm a good father,
I'm a good father
I'm a good father, am I?
My Annette will ask someday
- "Where is my mother?"
- Mommy! Daddy!
I will say that
I'm a good father
I'm a good father,
I'm a good father
But she's gone
I'm a good father
Mother and father
I'm a good father, am I?
♪ ♪
Hi, Consuelo.
How's my Baby Annette?
Much better. No more fever.
Oh, thank you so much.
You're welcome, Mr. McHenry.
Uh... see you tomorrow?
Yes. Have a good evening.
You, too.
Bye-bye, my love.
♪ ♪
Look at what I got for you.
What is it?
What is it, Annette?
What is that?
Look at that.
Are you excited?
Annette,
isn't it magical that...
Unbelievable
Amazing
It's really happening
She sings
She's a miracle
When the light shines on her
Astounding
Unbelievable
Amazing
It's really happening
It's really happening
To me.
It's a fast-changing world.
And I am now the conductor
of the city's finest orchestra.
No longer
the self-deprecating accompanist
from such a short while ago.
Ann would be proud of me.
I do have my suspicions, though,
about why she isn't alive.
And doubts, too,
about something else, but...
Excuse me a minute.
Henry has invited me
to his place tomorrow...
...to discuss a matter that he
says concerns Annette and Ann.
As awkward as it is
for me to attend,
anything that concerns Ann
and the future of Annette
is something that concerns me.
Excuse me one more time.
My love for Ann has never d*ed.
Neither has my regret
that our affair
was only an affair.
I had been hoping for so long.
Then at a time when she was in
despair, we started an affair.
But the very next week,
she met Henry.
That was the end of it,
the end of me.
I'll always regret that.
I deeply miss her...
her warmth, her voice.
I miss Ann. Excuse me.
Thank you.
Hey, Henry.
Thanks for coming by
My Conductor friend
Got something to show you
That will blow your mind
Follow me upstairs
As a friend of mine
You deserve to see this
It will blow your mind
Careful with the stairs
Have no fear, my friend
I'm not gonna play
Any trick of mine
♪ ♪
- Henry, what are you do...
- Shh.
Can you believe it?
I just can't believe it.
- Can you explain it?
- I can't explain it.
- Is it really happening?
- I don't know what to think.
Is it really happening?
I really don't know
what to think.
To us?
- How 'bout a drink?
- I need a drink.
A strong drink.
Here's my plan,
my sweet Conductor
We three travel round the world
She performs with you conducting
Backing her around the world
All the world
deserves to see this
It's our moral duty, right?
Well, what do you think,
Conductor?
Am I wrong or am I right?
If you would consent
To be there for her
Your fame will grow greater
Two hundred percent
We would tour the world
Show her to the world
Millions would go wild
Cherishing the child
This is really exploitation.
- No, not really
- Sure it is.
This is really exploitation.
- No, not really
- Sure it is.
You know what my future
looks like
From a money point of view
With the income from performance
She could have a future, too
- You're exploiting her, Henry.
- No, not really.
- You're exploiting Annette.
- No, not really!
Please make up your mind
Please make up
your mind
Please, Conductor friend
We cannot waste time.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
I have the same dream
Every night
Every night the same dream
Adrift
On an angry sea
And in a moment of rage
And stupidity
I k*ll
The one I love
Ann, forgive me
Ann
I beg you
Ann
Forgive me
♪ ♪
I have the same dream
Every night
Every night the same dream
She's here
Lying by my side
An exercise
In futility
Did I k*ll
The one I love?
There's no forgiveness
Ann
I beg you
There's no
Forgiveness...
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
You've read about her
You've heard about her
But nothing will have
prepared you for
What you're about to see
Nothing will have prepared you
For what you're
about to see and hear
Tonight
Tonight
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
To the premiere performance of
Baby Annette
Baby Annette
I am Henry McHenry
I am Henry McHenry
♪ ♪
Cynics among you may doubt
that what you're about to see
is real.
That it is not faked
in some way.
Let me assure you it is real.
Annette is a miracle.
Miracles do exist.
Without further ado
I introduce to you
Baby Annette
Baby Annette
♪ ♪
We love you, Annette!
- Exploitation!
- It's exploitation.
I love you!
- Annette!
- We love you!
Annette!
We love you, Annette!
Annette and me
And The Conductor are three
We're traveling round the world
We're traveling
round the world
We're traveling round the world
We're traveling
round the world
We're traveling round the world
We're traveling
round the world
♪ ♪
Ladies and gentlemen,
please make sure
your seats are
in the upright position.
We'll be landing...
Shortly
Here in Madrid
We love Annette
Here in Paris
We love Annette
Here in London
We love Annette, we love Annette
We love Annette
We love Annette
We love Annette
We love Annette, we love Annette
We love Annette
We love Annette, we love Annette
We love Annette...
Bon voyage
Bon voyage
Bon voyage
Bon voyage
Bon voyage
HENRY and CROWD:
Bon voyage
Bon voyage
Bon voyage
We're traveling round the world
We're traveling
round the world
We're traveling round the world
We're traveling round
the world -
We're traveling round the world
Bon voyage
Here in Stockholm
- We love Annette
- Bon voyage
Here in Cuba
- We love Annette
- Bon voyage
Here in Tokyo
- We love Annette
- Bon voyage
- We love Annette,
we love Annette -Bon voyage
- We love Annette
- Bon voyage
We love Annette.
What a beautiful,
beautiful night, huh?
Hey, my friend, would you look
after Annette while I go out
and let off just
a little bit of steam?
Sure, Henry,
I'll look after Annette.
We love each other
So much
So hard to explain it
So hard to explain
We love each other
So much
We love each other
So much
We love each other
So much
Speak soft when you say it
Speak soft
When you say
We love each other
So much.
All the girls I see
Look so great to me
What amazes me
Is what they see in me
All the girls I see
In France and Italy
Or here in Roppongi
What do they see in me?
Am I handsome? No
You're so handsome
Charming? Well, so-so
You're so charming
I'm a foreign guy
So exotic
Rich and drunk, maybe that's why
Hard to imagine
All these f*cking men
Who hate themselves but
Want us to love them
All the girls I see
Look so great to me
But will I ever be
Lovable again?
♪ ♪
I'm feeling
just a little bit drunk
I'm feeling
just a little bit tipsy
sh*t.
Where, you might ask, did I go?
That would be
none of your business
Where'd I put my house keys?
So glad to be back at home
Hey, Mr. Conductor friend,
good to see you
Thanks for watching Annette
How is Annette?
She's fine.
There's my little Annette
There's my little Annette
How's my little Annette?
How's my little Annette?
♪ ♪
How does she know that song?
You had no right
You had no right
to teach her that
You had no right
You had no right at all
You had no right
You had no right
to teach her that
You had no right
You had no right at all
That song was our song,
Ann's and my song
That was our song,
that song was our song
Ann's song and mine
That was our song
That was our song
No!
No, Henry,
I wrote that song for Ann.
What?
So I had every right to teach it
to my star pupil, Annette.
Yeah, bullshit.
You'd think you were her father
You'd think you were her father
You'd think you were her father
Maybe... I am.
I think I am.
This can't be true,
this can't be true
Sorry, Henry.
You see, before you came along,
Ann and I...
This can't be true
Could this be true?
No one must know this
or I'll lose my daughter
No one must know this
Or I'll lose my child
♪ ♪
Well, let's put Annette to bed
and then go by the pool
and talk it over, okay?
Good night, Annette.
♪ ♪
You see, my friend...
Henry, don't fool around
The water must be freezing.
You wouldn't want me to...
drown, would you?
I don't know.
What was I about to say?
Shall we talk
As you'd asked?
I can't stay,
can you make it fast?
Not to be impolite
But it's been a long, long night
Hey! Henry, no!
Stop fooling around.
You're quite drunk
Let's both sit down
What is it you need to say?
Sit down, Henry
Oh! Watch it! Hey!
Shh!
Okay, this isn't funny anymore.
- Not the least bit
funny anymore! -Shh!
- Get your hands off me.
- Shh!
Get your hands off of me.
What are you trying to do to me?
What are you trying...
What are you trying to do to me?
Stop it. Just stop it.
Just stop it, stop it, stop it.
Okay, okay. Okay, okay.
Stop it.
Oh! Stop, stop.
Henry, it's freezing
Hen... ry, I'm going down
I won't tell a single soul
Even you can't be this cold
So it was you
After all
No.
No.
If only
I had gotten Ann
To love me more
There's so little I can do
There's so little
- I can do -THE CONDUCTOR:
If only I'd gotten Ann
- To love me more
- There's so little I can do
If only I...
There's so little I can do
If only...
♪ ♪
Annette.
You're awake.
Everything
will be all right now.
I promise, Annette.
Connie O'Connor here
for "Show Bizz News"
With the shocking announcement
that Henry McHenry
has decided to end
Baby Annette's singing career.
Never again...
Before they move to Europe,
she will give
one last performance
to be announced shortly.
Never again...
The baby will never
perform again after that.
Never again
Never again.
♪ ♪
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
Welcome!
Welcome to
the Hyperbowl halftime show
- Wow! -To the thousands
who are here in attendance
- Welcome! -And the millions
who are watching at home
At home!
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
Welcome!
Welcome to
the Hyperbowl halftime show
To the thousands
who are here in attendance
Welcome!
And the millions
that are watching at home
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome our cherished
Baby Annette.
♪ ♪
I love you, Annette!
I love you!
As you all know by now,
this will be
her last public appearance.
So, ladies and gentlemen...
darkness.
Then a very sweet, soft light.
And then, for all eternity,
Baby Annette!
♪ ♪
Baby Annette
Baby Annette
This is the largest audience
that Annette has ever
performed in front of,
so some nervousness is
completely understandable.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Baby Annette.
Baby Annette
Baby Annette
We ask for your patience.
Baby Annette is a baby
after all.
So please, once again...
Baby Annette!
What the f*ck is
that little bitch doing?
Baby Annette
Baby Annette
Daddy...
Daddy k*lled people.
♪ ♪
RUSSELL and CHORUS:
True love always finds
True love always finds
A way
But true love often goes
True love often goes
Astray
♪ ♪
Henry! Henry!
You are a m*rder*r
A m*rder*r
m*rder*r!
You are a m*rder*r-♪ ♪
A m*rder*r
He is a m*rder*r,
he is a m*rder*r
There is no doubt at all that
- He is a m*rder*r
- MAN: Henry, you k*lled her!
- He is a m*rder*r
- Henry, you f*cking assh*le!
And he must pay the price and
- Whether it's first-degree
- Henry, I hate you!
- Or less than first-degree
- f*cking assh*le!
The point is moot to us 'cause
He's still a m*rder*r
- And whether it's death or jail
- g*dd*mn m*rder*r.
We'll send him
far, far, far away
- m*rder*r
- WOMAN: Go to hell!
m*rder*r
m*rder*r
He's a m*rder*r
You are a m*rder*r
m*rder*r
- You are a m*rder*r
- m*rder*r
You k*lled the one
that we all loved
Nearly religiously
Religiously
- Nearly religiously
- Religiously
No more will she die for us
Who will now die for us?
Will die for us?
- Who will now die for us?
- Will die for us?
No one can take her place
But you who despises us
Despises us
- You who despises us
- Despises us
We will now tame,
break and destroy
- Henry!
- Henry, over here!
- What you have to say?
- Public has the right to know!
m*rder*r!
m*rder*r! m*rder*r!
m*rder*r!
Please... raise your right hand.
Henry McHenry,
do you solemnly swear
that you will tell the truth,
the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth,
so help you God?
Truth!
Yes.
The truth is...
...you remind me so much
of my mother.
Mr. McHenry,
this court
won't tolerate effrontery.
Clerk, please.
Once again please.
Please...
Henry McHenry...
do you solemnly swear
that you will tell the truth,
the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth,
so help you
Go-o-o-o-o, o-o-d?
No.
You'll k*ll me if I do.
Stepping back in time
I'd pull Ann aside
"I'm so proud of you"
"I'm so proud of you"
Stepping back in time,
I'd pull Ann aside,
"I'm so happy for you
I'm so happy for you"
I'd say, "Ann,
what gives me the most joy
"Is to watch you
"I'm a small boy
"Wide-eyed in my awe
at your silken voice
"I admire you
- Never tire of you"
- ANN: Never be tired of you
Teary-eyed, she'll say
"I'm ashamed to see
"That we both can't be
Where we ought to be"
Crying, you will say
"It's so sad, you see
"That we both can't be
Who we ought to be"
Stepping back in time,
I could step aside
Not allow my rage
to be magnified
To a dangerous point
where a rash act
What an impact
I can't grab back
- No, there's no more time
- There's no more time
- What a shame
- Oh, what a shame
- That we both can't be
- That we can't be
- Where we ought to be
- Where we ought to be
- No, there's no more time
- There's no more time
- It's so sad to see
- So sad to see
- That we both can't be
- That we can't be
- Who we ought to be
- Who we ought to be
Henry.
♪ ♪
Henry.
She won't be the one
keeping you company in jail.
I will.
Day after day after day
Night after night after night.
It's incredible.
Annette.
Annette?
You've changed so much, Annette.
Yes.
Yes, I have.
You, too, have changed.
But at least
you're safe here, yes?
You can't drink and you can't
smoke here, can you?
No. No, I can't.
And you can't k*ll here,
can you?
It was a joke.
Mm, you are my daughter
after all.
No.
No more k*lling.
Only time.
"k*lling time."
Have you heard that expression?
No.
But now,
you have nothing to love.
Can't I love you?
No.
Not really.
Annette.
We don't have long.
♪ ♪
I'll sing these words to you
I hope that they'll ring true
They're not some magic chimes
To cover up my crimes
Annette, of this I'm sure
Imagination's strong
And reason's song
Is weak and thin
We don't have long
I stood upon a cliff
A deep abyss below
Compelled to look, I tried
To fight it off
God knows I tried
This horrid urge to look below
But half horrified
And half relieved
I cast my eyes
Toward the abyss
The dark abyss
I heard a ringing in my ears
I knew my death knell's
ugly sound
The overbearing urge to gaze
Into the deep abyss, the haze
So strong the yearning
for the fall
Imagination's strong
And reason's song
Is weak and thin
We don't have long
I'll never sing again
Shunning all lights at night
I'll never sing again
Smashing every lamp I see
I'll never sing again
Living in full darkness
I'll never sing again
A vampire forever
Annette, no.
No, no.
Annette, Annette.
No.
I sang these words to you
Can I forgive
what you have done?
I hope, that they'd ring true
And will I ever forgive Mom?
Imagination is so strong
Her deadly poison, I became
And reason's song
is never strong
Merely a child to exploit
Imagination is so strong
Forgive you both?
- And reason's song
- Forget you both?
- So faint and shrill
- To take that oath?
- I stood above the deep abyss
- To take that oath?
Why should I now forgive?
Why should I now forget?
I can never forgive,
I can never forget
Both of you were using me
for your own ends
For your own ends
Not an ounce of shame
The two of you,
you're both to blame
I wish that both of you
were gone
Wish you were gone
- No, don't blame Ann
- Wish you were gone
- Annette, that's wrong
- Wish you were gone
- No, don't blame Ann
- Both of you gone
But is forgiveness the sole way
This horrid urge to look below
When all has gone so far astray
God knows I tried
to fight it off
- Extract the poison
- Half horrified
- From one's heart
- And half relieved
- And from one's soul
- I cast my eyes
- I can't be sure
- Down the abyss
Forgive the two of you or not
- I take this oath
- Sympathy for
- Forgive you both?
- The dark abyss
- I take this oath
- Sympathy for
- I take this oath
- The dark abyss
Forgive you both?
- Or forget you both?
- Don't cast your eyes
- I must be strong
- Down the abyss
- I must be strong
- Annette, please don't
Time's up.
No contact.
And now you have nothing to love
Why can't I love you?
Can't I love you?
Now you have nothing to love
Can't I love you, Annette?
No, not really, Daddy
It's sad but it's true
Now you having nothing to love
Annette.
My Annette.
Never cast your eyes
down the abyss.
Goodbye
Annette
Goodbye
Annette
Goodbye
Annette
Goodbye
Annette.
Goodbye.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Stop watching me.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Action!
It's the end
So we bid you
Good night
Safe journey home
Watch out for strangers
If you liked what you saw
- Tell a friend
- ANNETTE: Tell a friend?
If you've no friends
Then, tell a stranger
Tonight
Ladies.
Three, four, one.
Good night one and all
Men.
MAN and WOMAN:
Three, four, one.
Good night one and all
- Everyone.
- Come on.
Three, four.
Good night
One
And all
Get ready.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Three, four.
- Ready?
Good night one and all
Good night one and all
Toutes les femmes.
Three, four.
Good night one and all
Tous les hommes.
Three, four.
Good night
One
And all!
♪ ♪
Annette (2021)
Moderator: Maskath3