09x21 - Galaxy Girls

[bunniefuu]

-[Mysterious music]

-Hi, I'm michael newman,
a professional lifeguard.

The ocean is a place
to enjoy and have fun.

But never swim by yourself,
always have a buddy--

-Director: cut, cut, cut!
-[Buzzer]

-Director: that was great.

Wow, wow! That was
great. Beautiful.

All right, guys,
we're gonna go again.

Melvin, step out
here. You're all done.

-What did I do wrong?

-Director: I
want you to make

The pull back a
little sooner, okay?

Just so we
can tighten it.

-Newman: what'd I do wrong?

-You? Nothing, nothing,
you were beautiful.

It's just, I want
another choice.

-Well, what can
I do differently?

-It's not you, milt, okay?

-It's mike.
-Whatever, cookie.

It's just-- just
not the right look.

-Well, this is the way
we do it at baywatch.

-Look, this is a public
service announcement for cable.

Cable, cookie.

-All right, well then
what do you want me?

You want me happy? Sad?

A big smile on my
face? What do you want?

-I want chucky dog.

Hey, somebody
bring chucky dog.

-I beg your pardon?

-We're gonna bring in
chucky. Where's chucky?

Come on, chucky
cookie. Come on.

Chucky, there he is.
Come on in, chucky.

I'll give him back
to you later, ladies.

Oh, give me
some love, chucky.

The hair, the whole
thing works. The shorts.

You look great in red.

I want you come
over here, okay?

Chucky dog, I want you to
hop in the water there, okay?

-Okay.

-Mel, take five.

-That's mike, and
I don't understand.

This guy looks nothing
like a lifeguard.

-Maybe, but he's
got a hot new cd.

He's marketable.
He's el fuego, baby!

You can't teach that.

-[Gasping and gulping]

-Where's chucky dog?

-I can't swim!

-Somebody get him
a box to stand on.

-Crew member:
box flying in.

-[Theme music playing]

-♪ Some people stand
in the darkness ♪

♪ Afraid to step
into the light ♪

♪ Some people need
to help somebody ♪

♪ With the edge of
surrender in sight ♪

♪ Don't you worry

♪ It's gonna be all right

♪ 'Cause I'm always ready

♪ I won't let you
out of my sight ♪

♪ [I'll be ready]
I'll be ready ♪

♪ [Never you fear]
no, don't you fear ♪

♪ [I'll be ready]

♪ Forever and always

♪ I'm always here

-[Exciting music]

-Alex: this is great.

Come on, gotta keep it up.

-Newman: all right.

[Hooting]

All right, all
right. Whoa!

Hey, come back
and pick me up.

-Alex: grab on.

-Newman: all
right, I'm on.

-Alex: I love this.

-All right, give
it some gas.

We're gonna come around
and pick up my boat.

All right, looking good.

Keep moving, keep
going, keep going.

So, what'd you think?

-I thought it
was fun. Thanks.

-Hey, alex, yeah
it was, wasn't it?

-Yeah, you're pretty
unbelievable out there.

-Ah, it's just a
lot of practice.

Hey, you weren't
so bad yourself.

-Well, I did have
the best teacher.

-You know, I was thinking
maybe we could go out together

On the sea-doo
some time again.

-Yeah, sure I'd like that.

-I don't know, maybe pull
one out of the windjet

While it's underway or
something like that.

-Newmie, you are
my kind of guy.

See you later.

-[Funky electronic music]

-[Excited chatter]

-Obviously, you've all heard

About the miss galaxy
beauty and fitness contest,

Obstacle course and swimwear
competition in redondo beach

Co-sponsored by our
very own baywatch.

-Yeah, you want
us to compete?

-That's up to you.

What's up to me, is picking
the right kind of people

To organize the event.

-Oh, I'd like to do that.

-Yeah, count me in.

-One, two, count
yourselves in.

Thank you very much.

-So what do we have to do?

-The galaxy people set up the
obstacle course, promotion,

And pick the
celebrity host.

-Celebrity? What celebrity?

-It says here,
someone well-known,
instantly recognizable,

And someone who you're
all used to seeing

Surrounded by
beautiful women.

-Well, look no
further, ladies.

-Sorry, he said we
need somebody famous.

-Oh, but I am famous.

Haven't I ever told you
about the time that i--

-Yes.

-How about the time that i--

-Yes.

-You two, do me a
favor, go organize.

-Well, see ya.

-What?

-Ask me why I'm smiling.

-I just did.

-Alex and I went for a
sea-doo ride together.

-Wow.

-Yesterday, we
went windsurfing.

-I'll notify the media.

-You sound jealous.

-Really? I was
trying for irritated.

What the hell are
you talking about?

-Alex and i, we've been
seeing a lot of each other.

-Newmie, I'm busy.

-I think she likes me.

-You're a very likable guy,

But right now
you're pushing it.

-I think she has
the hots for me.

-The hots?

-Yes, romantically
linked. Amore.

Where are you going?

-To get you a doctor.

-She said, and I quote,
"newmie," she called me newmie.

-Everybody does. I
mean, that is your name.

-She said, "newmie,
you're just the kind of man

I want in my
life." End quote.

Where are you going?

-To get her a doctor.

Maybe the two of you can
get a group discount.

"The hots"?

-"Just the kind of
guy I want in my life."

Yes!

-Hey, thanks for
watching our water.

-Lifeguard:
hey, no problem.

-Instantly recognizable?

-Someone surrounded
by beautiful women?

-How are we supposed to
find somebody like that?

-Well, we just
open our eyes.

Look.

-[Gasps] george hamilton?

-You think?

-Think?

-Couldn't be.

-Could too.

-Out here, on our beach?

-He's gotta be
somewhere. Why not here?

Come on, let's go see.

-Hi.
-Hi.

-Hello.

Your shadows have spilled
over into my reflective zone.

-Sorry.

-It's all right. It's
just a critical time of day

For tanning lines.

-Yeah, you know, you
should be careful.

You don't want to
get too much sun.

-Too much sun? I'm a
professional, my dear.

-Excuse me, but
you're him, aren't you?

-"Him," who?

-George hamilton.

-No. No, I'm not him.

A lot of people think
I look like him.

Wish I did, he's kind
of like a god to me.

Trying to get his tan.

-It sure looks like him.

-That's because it is him.

-But he said--

-Okay, sometimes stars
don't want you to think

That they are
who they are,

Because the paparazzi
and the press.

-Excuse me, we really
don't want to infringe

Upon your privacy
or anything, but--

-I'm april.
This is jessie.

And we realize you have
a busy schedule, but--

-No, I haven't got
much going on right now.

-Really?

-Well then,
mr. Hamilton--

-I'm not him.

-Well, what would you
like for us to call you?

-It'd be nice if
you call me earl.

That's my stage
name, earl.

-Well okay, "earl."

We have a business
proposition for you.

-Well, what kind?

-Well, for starters,
you'll be on tv

With a lot of
beautiful women.

-Tv, huh? That's a
good start, go on.

-All right, that's
three o'clock, all right?

-Yeah.

-All right, so you
meet me in my place.

You know how to get there.
-No, it's good, man.

-Hey, manny. Welcome back.

-Yeah.
-How you doing?

-Okay, I guess.

-Hey, manny.
Welcome back.

-You know, I'm not back.

I'm gonna clean out my
locker and say goodbye.

-Say goodbye? What
are you talking about?

-Look at me, mitch.

I can't walk, I can't
run, I can't swim.

I can't be a
lifeguard anymore.

-Well you know, I can
think of plenty of things

That need to be
done around here.

-Yeah, if you
have two good legs.

-Actually, you're
just the man I need.

-For what?

Do the towels
need washing?

-No. Ron is
going on vacation,

And I need backup
at the switchboard.

-What is this? Charity?

-No, it's not. It's
a very good idea.

-I think it's sucks.

All right, because I can
take my early retirement.

I can get my injury pay, and
I could make more money than--

Than some stupid operator.

-Yeah, you could, or you
could take an important job

Around here and
help all of us.

-No way.

You know what, this
place is in violation.

There's no ramps out there.

Crips like me can't go
up and down those stairs.

-Well, we'll just
have to do something

About that, won't we?

-Yeah.

I had to take the
freight elevator up here.

I felt like a desk or
some damn filing cabinet.

-What about the
stuff in your locker?

-Forget it, because I
don't need it anymore!

-[Downcast music]

-Help! Help!

Help! Help!

Help me!

[Coughing]

-April: you okay?

-Manny: yeah, I'm fine.

-April: I thought you were
gonna hit the pilings for sure.

-Manny: no. Me?
Are you kidding?

No piling's gonna
take me out.

-[Beach chatter]

-Hey, alex.

-Newmie, my main man.

-Do you really mean that?

-Well, figuratively.

I mean, I was
trying to be cool.

I guess I failed.

What's up?

-The padi project.

-Patty?

-Professional association
of dive instructors,

The people who certified you.

-Right, that padi.

-Once a year, padi's project
aware holds a worldwide

Ocean cleanup.

Volunteers clean
up the beaches,

Both on top and
below the water.

Want to come with me?
We can dive for trash.

-And they say
romance is dead.

-I know, it didn't
sound so good.

-No, it sounds great.

-Then it's a date?

-Sure, it's a date. Yeah.

-You're on. See ya.

-See ya.

-[Peaceful music]

-Good news.

-What'd they do extend daylight
savings time year-round?

That's a good
joke for the act.

-No, we talked to the
galaxy contest officials.

-And they think you'd make
a great master of ceremonies.

So what do you think?

-Good.
-Good! [Giggling]

-There are some perks.

-Like what?

-Wardrobe?

-Limousine?

-Manicurist?

-Masseuse?

-It's the cost of being a
god, like george hamilton.

-Two-nine-five to scarab
one, we need backup

Off china cove reef.

Glass bottom boat
pulling a titanic.

Can you assist?

-Scarab one crew: affirmative,
I'm two miles southeast.

Hi-ho silver, away.

Hey, manny, how you doing?

-Hey, manny, you know,
just because you're

In that wheelchair doesn't
mean you have to stop living.

I can teach you how to work
this beast in five minutes.

Come on, give it a sh*t.

-[Tense music]

-Not much of
a turnout, huh?

-No. How do you make
collecting trash fun?

-I have an idea.

-I like it.
-You do?

-All right, thank you
everyone for showing up

To the 10th annual
padi project aware

Underwater trash pickup.

Can you gather all your
stuff, and we'll head on down

To the water.

-Meet you down there.

-[Laughing] that's good.

-Newmie: hello.

-Hey, newmie, my
man. How's it going?

-Good. Did you have
a good time today?

-Terrific, yeah it was fun.

-Listen, I was thinking
maybe you and I could go out

And get beer and a bite to
eat after work tomorrow?

-Sure, sounds good. Just
tell me where and when.

-Well, where is a secret,

But how about I pick
you up at seven?

-Seven it is.

-Cool. See you later.

Bye, mitch.

-So what are you gonna do
when he makes his big move?

-Move? Who?

-Newmie.

-Oh, very funny.

You know newmie and
I are just friends.

-Well, you and I
might think that,

But he has quote-unquote
"the hots" for you.

-The hots? You mean like--

-Yep, those hots.

-This is not good.

-What's worse, he thinks
you have the hots for him.

-Me and newmie, the hots?

-Yes, yes, and yes.

-Oh dear god.

[Sighs]

-Two-one-four, this is
two-nine-five, can you respond

To help out at
tower 12 or not?

-Responding lifeguard:
respond to what?

-I just called you a minute
ago, I put you on hold.

-Responding lifeguard:
no you didn't.

-This is two-nine-five, did
I just call you a minute ago?

-Responding lifeguard: me? No.

-This is two-nine-five,
who's this?

-Responding lifeguard:
it's me again, manny.
What do you want?

-Damn it!

-Hey, hey, hey,
take it easy.

What's the matter, here?

-I can't get the
switchboard to work right.

-Just give it some time,
you'll get the hang of it.

-What if I don't,
huh mitch?

What am I gonna do, I
can't do anything else.

-Manny, don't b*at yourself
up, it takes time to adjust.

-I used to be a
lifeguard, mitch.

Now I'm just a temp worker,
and I can't do anything right.

-[Solemn music]

-Excuse me, i--

I found him, thank you.

Hey.

We both know I'm here.

Aw come on, manny, I
looked everywhere for you.

-I've been here with
all the other rejects.

-What are you doing?

-I'm online,
got some email.

There's this guy in hawaii I
met through america online,

He's a paraplegic too.

-Really? What do
you guys talk about?

-Talk about things
we can't do anymore.

-Oh for god's sake.

You know what, I'm
sorry, I can't.

-Hey, what are you doing?

-I'm low on self-pity
right now, okay?

Here's me in your face.
You're being rude.

-What do you
want from me?

-You know, I knew this
little kid once, you know.

A real spunky guy, real big
smile, real positive attitude.

You know what he said?

He said he wanted
to be a lifeguard.

He said he wanted to be a
lifeguard more than anything

In the world and that nothing
would stand in his way.

And you know
what, nothing did.

-Yeah well, he's changed.

-I don't like him
very much anymore.

-Why don't you just
get off my back, mitch!

-You gotta live your life,
whether you like it or not.

Why don't you concentrate
on the things you can do

Instead of crying over
the things you can't.

You want me to get off
your back, fine I'm off it.

Why don't you get
off your back?

-[Solemn music]

-Hey.

What's this?

-It's my job application.

-It's all computer stuff.

-Yeah, I've been talking to
the special needs department

At ibm.

And they helped me
come up with the plan.

-What's the plan?

-To bring baywatch
into the 21st century.

I want to computerize
that dinosaur switchboard,

And I want to put
laptops and cameras

On every single
lifeguard tower.

And I want to connect
it all to a motherboard

Here at headquarters.

-Cameras?

-Eyes in the sky.

Outside of headquarters and
on key lifeguard towers.

I could see problems
on the beach.

And I could tell the lifeguards
where those problems are at.

-"I," meaning?

-Me.

Look, this is something
I can do, mitch.

Let me do it, please.

-Manny, this is awesome.

I mean it's great,
but this is expensive.

-Ibm will supply the
equipment if we test the system

Here at baywatch.

-You're back on the
payroll, lifeguard.

-[Tense music]

-Announcer: hello
ladies and gentlemen,

Welcome to the 7th annual miss
galaxy fitness competition

Staged right here at
beautiful redondo beach.

-April: that's
great, george.

-My left side might be
a little better, huh?

-Hey, can you girls move a
little bit closer to george?

-Sure.
-Oh yeah, come on.

-Okay, how's this?

-Good, huh?
-Will this work?

-Yeah, perfect.

-You getting a
flare from the teeth?

Okay, that's it, girls.
That's enough for now.

-Where are you
going, george?

-Massage.

-Massage?

-Massage, it's in
the list. Massage.

-Yeah, but we still
have the swimsuit portion

Of the competition.

Not to mention, the
press conference for
last year's winner.

-Hosting gets me tense.

It's not easy being
george hamilton.

Ta-ta.

Groovin', baby.

-Great.

-[Cheerful rock music]

-♪ You're looking so good
♪ my blood runs hot

♪ Living for the moment
♪ in the summer of love

♪ I got my friends feeling alright

♪ Temperature is rising
♪ into overdrive

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ How come you feel so good

♪ Legs up to heaven looking so fine

♪ Reaching to the galaxy
♪ the edge of time

♪ Show me the way into your heart ♪

♪ I know I've loved
♪ you from the very start

♪ Baby baby baby why can't you see

♪ Just exactly what you're doing to me

♪ Baby baby baby why can't you see

♪ My bloods running hot won't you
♪ give it to me

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ How come you feel so good

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ How come you feel so good

♪ How come you feel so good

♪ How come you feel so good

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ how come you feel so good

♪ Sweet sweet summer
♪ come on and tell me

♪ Why do you feel so good
♪ why do you feel so good

♪ Come on baby yeah

♪ How come you feel so good

♪ How come you feel so good

-Hold on right there.

-Sure.

-Newmie: we're here.

-Where?

-Newmie: the secret
spot I told you about.

-I thought that we were
just gonna have a beer

And a bite to eat.

-Well, we are, figuratively.

-Right. You know, in a
restaurant with a lot of people

Around us, that
kind of thing.

-No, just armand and us.

-Armand?

-Armand.

Come on.

This is one of my most favorite
spots on the entire coast.

Just a romantic beach,
beautiful sunsets.

And the views, oh it's
absolutely magnificent.

-Alex: it's
beautiful, but newman--

-I love the view, don't you?

-Yeah, it's great.

-Here.

-I'll just--

-Oh! Here, come.

Duck a l'orange.

-I beg your pardon?

-It's what we're
having for dinner.

Hold on just a second, I
need to check with armand.

-[Groaning]

Okay.

-[Phone ringing]

-Buchannon.

-Mitch, help.

-Mitch: what's wrong?

-It's newmie, he's getting
ready to make his move.

-How do you know?

-Because we're on the
beach, alone, with armand,

And he's making
duck a l'orange.

-Alex, what do
you want me to do?

-I want you to come
have dinner with us,

Because if you're here,
he won't do anything.

I need a chaperone.

-Oh for god's sake,
you're a big girl.

-Please? I don't want
to hurt his feelings.

If you're here, he
won't do anything.

-Alex, you know what
they say, "two's company."

-Point doom, get here or I
will never speak to you again.

-Hello.

-[Alex chuckles]

-You know, this view
is so romantic.

I didn't want you to
miss a moment of it.

Let me just get my chair
and move it around.

Did you like armand's
duck a l'orange?

-Oh, it was superb, I
really appreciate you

Going through
all this trouble.

-Armand, I think we're
done with our course.

Could you take the plates?

-Yes, sir.

-Alex: thank you, armand.

-Thank you very much, and I
think we should have a toast

To the most beautiful woman
on the most romantic beach--

-Oh, mitch!

-No, that's a car on the
highway. That's not mitch.

To the most beautiful woman
on the most romantic beach--

-Oh look, there's mitch.

-No, that's a woman
on that sea-doo.

-You're right.

-To the most beautiful woman
on the most romantic beach--

-Hey, mitch! There he is.

-Why do you
keep saying that?

-Hey, mitch! Hey!

-Hey, alex. Hey, what
are you doing here?

-What are you doing here?

-I'm doing a
little surf fishing.

-Well, why here?

Why not up there
or down there?

Or how about mexico?

-I guess we found your
little secret spot, huh?

-Well I guess it's
no secret anymore.

-Nope.

-Oh, having a little
dinner, are we?

-Yes, we are having
duck a l'orange.

Would you like to join us?
We still have some left.

-No, you stay, how often
do you get a chance?

-[Excited cross-talk]

-Guys, guys take it easy.

I'll tell you what, I'm
gonna continue to fish

But right down
there, okay?

You guys finish your dinner
and pretend I'm not even here.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

-I will save you dessert.

Newmie--

-Maybe I was thinking
after dinner we could

Take a drive up the
coast, walk in the sand,

Watch the sunset.

And then, maybe could--
-newman, don't.

-Don't what?

-Don't say anything,
don't do anything.

Don't make a move.

-I don't understand.

-[Sighs]

Look, newman, you
are the sweetest guy.

I mean, everybody loves you.

And I like you
a ton, you know,

But not like that.

I have had the best time
hanging out with you

And doing stuff.

Newmie, you and
i, we're buddies.

Good buddies are hard
to find, you know.

And I was just thinking,

That I really don't
want to mess that up.

You understand?

-Yeah.

I'll tell you what we
should do to fix this.

-What's that?

-Let's stop this
dating thing.

Just hang out together
whenever we feel like it,

Like buddies do.

-Like buddies.

-Buddies.

-You are such the man.

-Hey! Hey, I
got one! [Laughs]

-[Laughing]

-[Action-packed music]

-Announcer: on your
marks, get set, go!

-[Cheering]

-Manny: two-nine-five
to tower 12.

-Tower 12, manny.
What's up?

-You got some kids behind
you unloading their car.

They got a barbecue
and a case of beer.

-I'll take care of it.

-Manny: scarab two,
this two-nine-five.

-Scarab two lifeguard:
scarab two. Send your traffic.

-You've got a beer regatta
going on about a hundred yards

Off the jetty.

And there's a wave runner
taking target practice.

-Scarab two lifeguard:
working on it.

-Tower eight, this
is two-nine-five.

-Tower eight: this is
eight, two-nine-five. Come in.

-There's a guy in a t*nk
top and a baseball hat

Just north of your tower
and he's picking pockets.

-Tower eight: I see him.

-I'll notify the police
while you detain him.

-Tower eight:
that's a roger.

-Wow, that's awesome.

Everything working?

-Yeah, perfect.

-Welcome back to baywatch.

Great to have you here.

-Thanks, mitch.

Hey, thanks for the
kick in the butt.

-Hey, anytime.

-I know.

-Host: here we are
at the final stages

Of the miss
galaxy competition.

These judges sure have a
hard decision ahead of them.

So ladies, give one last
chance to show off your stuff

Before advancing on to
the individual interviews.

-[Cheering]

And now, once again, our
celebrity host, george hamilton.

-The galaxy girls, ladies
and gentlemen. Yes, sir.

Let's have a big hand for
them, the galaxy girls.

Well, the obstacle course and
swimwear competition are over.

And it's time for
the winner's circle.

This features the top
women, who are judged

By their overall appearance,
beauty, body tone,

Poise, confidence, and--

Cheryl, could you
lift the card?

-Oh.

-Confidence and
stage presence.

Each contestant will answer
a predetermined question,

And the final decision
from the judges

Will decide this
year's miss galaxy!

Yes, sir! Let's
have a big hand!

For the galaxy girls.

But first, a lot of people
think george hamilton

Got a big head.

Well, a lot of you don't
see him the way I see him.

And I just want to
do something for you,

Because you've been
a great audience.

The press, here, if you
want to leave a number,

I'll give you a head
sheet and maybe call.

[Chuckles]

-Well that's it
ladies and gentlemen.

Gotta leave now.

[Chuckles] oh, no. Not here.

Goodbye, all. Thank
you very much.

-April and jessie:
earl! Earl!

-Come back here!

-What are you thinking?

-Where are you going?

-I'm michael newman, a
professional lifeguard.

The ocean is a fun and
exciting place to play.

But don't ever
swim by yourself.

Always have a
buddy with you--

-Director: cut, cut,
cut, cut, cut.

That was great.
Awesome, pause the set.

Come on out, okay, mark?

-That's mike.

-Whatever, I'll
tell you what,

I want to try something
new here, all right?

So, it's a wrap. Okay, milt?

-That's mike.

-Okay, whatever.
Cookie, come on in here.

You're great.

Has anyone ever told you
that you look a lot like--

-Yeah, I know,
warren beatty.

-Director: come
on in here, cookie.

Get in the water, beatty.

-George: get in the water?

But it's cold.

I don't have to mess
up my hair, do i?

-[End theme playing]