04x11 - Where No Fan Has Gone Before

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Futurama". Aired: March 28, 1999 - September 4, 2013.*
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Accidentally frozen, pizza-deliverer Fry wakes up 1,000 years in the future.
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04x11 - Where No Fan Has Gone Before

Post by bunniefuu »

[ Man ]
one, two! One, two, three!

[ Siren wailing ]

A hush comes over the crowd.

The only sound is bender
calling everyone else a jerk
as he swings!

Oh, and he slices
into the water!

D'oh, man!
[ Groaning ]
[ whirring ]

Well, boy, I tell ya, buddy--
uh!

Bad news, everyone!
You're not good enough
to go on your next mission.

Hooray!
Not good enough!

- Why? Says who?
- Because. And says me.

It's an extremely
dangerous mission
that k*lled my last crew,

And you're not nearly
as good as them.
Whoo-hoo!

We live to suck
another day!

[ Both grunting
rhythmically ]

Huh? Oh!

We are just as good
as any of those other crews
you sent to their deaths.

- What's the mission?
- Collecting honey.
Ordinary honey.

- That doesn't sound
so dangerous.
- This is no ordinary honey!

It's produced by
vicious space bees.

A single sting
of their hideous neurotoxin
can cause instant death!

And that's if you're
not allergic. You don't want
to know what happens then.

[ Shuddering ]
oh, no, no. God, no.

Your insides will boil out
of your eye sockets
like a science-fair volcano.

I didn't want to know!
[ Sobbing ]

These bees are larger
than most buicks
and twice as ugly.

Larger than an american sedan?
Whoo! How big is the honeycomb?

Honeycomb's big.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- It's not small?
- No, no, no.

It'll take more than deadly,
deadly bees to keep us
from doing our job.

- Come on, boys.
- But, leela, we're no good.

Listen, I'm scared too.
But I'm more scared
of disappointing myself.

I'm not scared of that
at all. Hooh!

[ Buzzing ]

Now, bees communicate
by dancing.

Like my parents!
Oh, wait. That was hitting.

So this language cartridge
will let you distract them.

Ah, good. I often have
thoughts and feelings that can
only be expressed through dance.

[ Buzzing ]

[ Giggling ]

[ Fry, bender moaning
fearfully ]

- [ All gasp ]
- bender, quick!
Waggle something!

Uh-- [ buzzing ]

[ Buzzes ]

Leela, let's turn back.
There's absolutely no shame
in wussing out.

Relax.
Everything'll be fine.

Oh!
Oh, my god!

The old planet express ship!
There's the black box.

[ Man #1 ]
captain!
The bees have us surrounded!

Oh, the professor was right!
We're not as good
as his old crew!

[ Man #2 ] well, I aim to prove
him wrong. It'll take more than
a few deadly, deadly bees to--

[ Screaming ]
oh, lord! Aa-aa-aah!
[ Clicks off ]

I couldn't make that out.
Too much static.
[ Moans ]

[ Buzzing ]

Eww!

[ All gasp ]

We found it!
The honeycomb hideout!

- Hey, what's this goop?
- Royal jelly.
They feed it to the queen.

Bees make honey and jelly?
Huh!

How come nothing humans make
tastes good? [ Screams ]

[ Sputtering ]
help!

I can't swim in jelly,
as far as I know! Uh!

Look!
It's a baby queen.

Aww, she's so cute!

You adorable, wittle,
itty-bitty, fuzzy-wuzzy--

Leela, stop bonding
and let's go!
I got jelly in my underpants!

I'm taking this bee with us.
With a queen we can build a hive
and make more honey ourselves.

Let me just pack her a lunch
and we'll go.

Pick up the pace, lady!
[ Buzzing ] I'm sick of shaking
my booty for these fat jerks.

[ Buzzing angrily ]

Uhh, I didn't mean
you're all fat--
[ buzzing ] just fatso there.

[ Buzzing ]

[ Buzzing ]

[ Yelping ]
oh!

Aah! Ohh!
[ Buzzing ]

Help! Ooh-- da-- yipe!
[ Gibberish ]

This is where we
distinguish ourselves
from the last crew.

Activate emergency,
high-speed, self-contained,

Escape-pack
crisis-response units.

[ Electronic warble ]
quick!

[ Electronic warble ]
whaa-aa-aa!

Whoa-oa-oa!

Ow! Ow!
[ Grunting ]

[ Buzzing ]

Aah! Ooh! Uh!

- [ Bender yelps ]
- [ leela ] good luck, bender!

[ Buzzing ]

I'm back, baby! Blaah!

[ Buzzing angrily ]

We made it!
We're alive!
Burn on that old crew.

-The only things they did better
than us were suck and die.
-Leela, we got lucky this time.

But you should be more careful.
I don't want anything
to happen to you.

Thanks, but I can look out
for myself. Frankly, I can
smell danger a mile away.

- Look out!
- Aah!
- [ Buzzing angrily ]

You want her? You're gonna
have to go through me!

Waah!
Uhh!

Aah! Uhh!

[ Horn honking ]

You call that a wound?
That's a boo-boo, tops.

But thanks for trying
to save me, fry. Fry?

[ Gasps ]

He's-- he's dead.

Oh, who will
make bender waffles...

Just the way he
likes them now?

[ Mourners sobbing ]

[ Crying ]

It was all my fault!
He d*ed because of me!

No, no, no,
no, no, no.

I'm lying to make
her feel better.

[ Wailing ]

Husband, can't you go anywhere
without lightin' somethin' up?

It's an old jamaican
accounting tradition.
We burn his time card.

That way, his zombie
doesn't come back looking
for his final paycheck.

He looks so natural. It's funny
to think he's crammed full
of sawdust and preservatives.

I only wish I could've
removed the stinger.

[ Gong rings ]

I barely knew philip,
but as a clergyman,

I have no problem telling
his most intimate friends
all about him.

[ All crying ]
[ hermes ]
soothe us with sweet lies.

It may comfort you to know
fry's death took
only 15 seconds,

Yet the pain was so intense
that it felt to him
like 15 years.

And it goes without saying,
it caused him
to empty his bowels.

[ All gasping ]

We now commend
fry's body to the ages.

[ Stinger crunching ]
♪♪ [ bagpipes ]

He's walking on sunshine now.

This makes me the oldest member
of my family.

[ Hysterical sobbing ]

Him do good snu-snu.

Ehh.
Hmm.
[ Whistles ]

All those times I said,
"k*ll all humans,"

I'd always whisper,
"except one."

Fry was that one.
[ Gasping ]

And I never told him so.
[ Crying ]

Farewell from
the world of tomorrow!

[ Grunts, snores ]

[ Sniffles ]

[ Sobs ]
they say a spoonful
of space honey...

Helps ease the pain.

[ Slurps, gulps ]

[ Gasps, whimpers ]

[ Sobs ]
it's good!

[ Gulps ]
I feel funny-- ha-ha funny.

[ Giggling ]

Huh?

- Leela?
- Fry? I thought you were dead.

Nope.
I'm better than ever.

Before the accident,
I couldn't do this.

Impressive.
But it does sort of support
my "you are dead" theory.

Then I'll prove I'm alive
by telling you something
only I could know.

There's a surprise for you
in my locker.

I got it at
a swedish novelty shop
before we left.

[ Gasps ]
it's too beautiful to open.
Can I open it?

- Sure. There's just one thing
I want you to do.
- What?

I want you to wake up.
Wake up?
But I'm not--

[ Snorts ]
[ yelps ]

In my dream,
fry said he hid a gift
for me in his locker.

If it's true, then he must
still exist in some form.

Of course he still exists--
as a frozen corpse
in outer space.

[ Chuckling ]
oh, I made myself sad.

Well, here goes.
[ Inhales deeply ]

[ Screeching ]

[ All groan ]
bubkes.

♪♪ [ Whistling ]

Well, I feel better now.
Pawning all the stuff in fry's
locker helped give me closure.

Was there anything in there
that might have been
a gift for me?

No, nothin'.
Not at all.

No way, jose.
Here it is.

You took this
from fry's locker?

Hey, the guy's dead.
There's no law
against grave robbin'.

[ Gasps ]
[ squeaking ]

That proves it!
Fry is alive somewhere,

And he's reaching me
in my dreams!
Bull pies!

Lay down here
and we'll do some tests.

If fry is out there
somewhere,
[ beeping ]

Leela's brain could be acting
as a five-pound ouija board.

Is this some sort
of brain scanner?

Some sort, yes. In france,
it's called a guillotine.

[ Gasps ]

Professor! Can't you examine
my brain without removing it?

Yes, easily.
[ Whirring ]

Hey, what if fry wasn't actually
dead when we buried him?
You know, like julia roberts.

Well, I suppose
there's a slim--
[ bell ringing ]

[ Gasps ]
I don't believe it!

What is it? Is fry alive
in some other dimension
or something?

No! According to this
gizmometer, fry is dead
and nothing can bring him back.

- Remarkable!
- But... My dream.

Your science
can't unprove that.

How could I have known
the gift was in fry's locker?

Easy.
He told you about it
before he d*ed,

And your grief-roasted mind
blocked it out.

Are you saying...
I'm going crazy?

No, no.
No one's saying that.

But I'm certainly
thinking it loudly.

[ Muttering ]
[ snoring,
chirping ]

Hi, leela.
I'm just gonna keep talking,
even if you can't hear me.

Blah-blah-blah,
blah-blah-blah-blah-blah.

Shut up! I can hear you!
The professor says
you're just a dream.

Oh, yeah?

Could a dream take you dancing
in a venusian garden?

Well, yes, technically.
But it's still
very sweet of you.

Then what if we shared
a midnight sleigh ride across
the ice fields of hyperion?

Oh, fry,
you must be alive.

I've never been treated
so romantically by my
own imagination before.

Here, take my jacket.
You look a little cold.
Thank you.

It's all so beautiful,
I forgot how many hundreds of
degrees below zero it must be.

I just wish I could convince
the others you're alive.

You can.
All you have to do is wake up.

No, no! Don't say that!
This is real!

- [ Snorts ] not another dream!
- [ Nibbler yelps ]

[ Gasps ]

Fry's jacket--
the one he was buried in!

My dream was real!
[ Loudly ] he's alive!

[ Thumping ]
[ woman ] quit your braggin'!
My boyfriend's alive too!

[ Thudding ]
oop, not anymore.

[ Screaming ]


That's better.

[ Panting ]
fry's alive! I have proof!

[ All scoffing ]
you do not!

I'm from jamaica,
the "show me" island, so show me
you blowin' it out your fanny.

But he gave me his jacket.
Look!

That's not fry's jacket.
Fry's jacket is red.

That's your jacket,
an off-the-rack,
lime-green affair.

But fry-- his jacket--

And when I woke up,
it was on me!

You're under a lot
of guilt stress, leela.
Here, work it out.

I am not under stress,
damn it!
[ Rapid squeaking ]

[ Farnsworth's voice ]
everything's going to be
all right, leela.

- What?
- I said, everything's
going to be all right.

Uh-- uh, maybe I am
freakin' out a little.

A little? You're screwier
than my aunt rita,
and she's a screw.

I need to calm down.
I better take some more
of that space honey.

You've been taking space honey?
Be careful,
you purple-haired imbecile!

One spoonful
calms you down.

Two spoonfuls
help you sleep.

But three spoonfuls, and you'll
go into a sleep so deep,
you'll never wake up.

- Never!
- Never!

- [ Amy's voice ] never!
- [ Gasps ]

One spoonful
to calm me down.

[ Gulps ]

Okay. I got a pretty good
"calm" going.

Two spoonfuls
to help me sleep.

[ Gulps ]

Uh-oh. Still awake.

I guess one more spoonful
couldn't hurt. Uh!

Oh, my gosh!
I better get a sponge!

Fry? Is that you?
I don't need a sponge!

[ Yawns, smacks lips ]
why am I sticky and naked?
Did I miss something fun?

Incredible!
According to the gizmometer,

Fry touched the royal jelly
in the space hive,

Leaving an imprint
of his d.n.a.
And brain waves.

Then, when it spilled
on the couch,

It recombined
with trace amounts
of fry's hair and skin--

And blood!
Don't forget about fry's blood.

Yes, bender, thank you.
In short, the various fluids
fry left in the couch...

Caused the royal jelly
to regenerate his entire being!

Neat!
This is great!

My buddy's alive, and his
credit cards are valid again!
Let's go get hammered!

[ All cheering ]

I should warn you--
I'm a mean drunk.

- Fry, I'm so glad
I didn't k*ll you.
- Me too.

Feeling responsible
for your death
was driving me mad.

But now everything
is all right.
Uh, not everything.

What? What do you mean?
You have to wake up.

Wake up? Oh, no.
No! It can't be!

[ Snorts ]
huh? Pooh!

I'm cracking up.
In my dreams I'm happy,
because fry is alive.

- But when I'm awake,
my mind plays tricks on me.
- Oh, take it easy, leela.

In every life,
we have some trouble.

But when you worry,
you make it double.

♪ Don't worry, be happy ♪

♪♪ [ Scatting ]
♪ the landlord say
your rent is late ♪

♪ You may have
to litigate ♪

♪ But don't worry ♪

♪ Be ♪
♪ happy ♪

♪ Ain't got no cash
ain't got no style ♪

♪ Ladies vomit
when I smile ♪

But does zoidberg worry?
Feh! You wish!

♪ Be ♪
♪ happy ♪

Don't worry, now, amy.

Okay. I'm happy!

Take us home, bender!
♪ Ah, don't worry ♪

- ♪ Be ♪
- ♪ happy ♪♪

- Uh, were you just singing?
- No. I was tellin' you
not to worry.

I'm not allowed to sing.
Court order.

I'll find fry's coffin,
get his corpse...

And keep it under my
mattress to remind me
that he's really dead.

- That'll prove I'm not insane.
- ♪♪ [ "Theme from
2001: a space odyssey" ]

Okay. It's just
an ordinary coffin,

Containing my ordinary
dead friend who I k*lled!

♪♪ [ Angelic vocalizing ]

[ Snorts ]
what happened?
Why am I in my apartment?

[ All ]
you k*lled fry! You k*lled fry!

You k*lled fry! You k*lled fry!
Stop it! Stop it!

- Yee-aah!
- [ Gibberish ]
- you k*lled fry.

[ Revving ]
[ screaming ]

Okay. I'm insane.
[ Thuds ]

But I'm still sane enough
to know it.

[ Sighs ]
the only time I feel all right
is in my dreams... With you.

Three spoonfuls.
Then I can dream forever.

[ Gulps ]
one.

[ Gulps ]
two.

Here goes.
Good-bye, waking world.

- [ Fry ] leela, no!
- [ Buzzing ]

Listen to me.
You don't want to lie in bed
like a vegetable...

And do nothing
the rest of your life;
I've tried it.

Bedsores hurt!
Then what am I
supposed to do?

- Fight it!
- I can't!

You can. The leela I know
doesn't give up this easily.

Okay. I'll try.

[ Buzzing ]
ugh!

Go away! Ooh!

I don't know if you can hear me,
leela, but there's something
I want to tell you.

I-i love you.
I'm so scared, fry.
I don't know what to do!

Just wake up, leela.
Please, just wake up.

I don't understand
what you mean.
[ Sobs ] just wake up.

Please.
Just wake up, leela.

[ Sniffling, sobbing ]

Fry. Y-you're alive.
Leela! You're awake!

Of course I'm awake.
You wouldn't stop waking me.
Where am i?

In the hospital.
The ambulance took you here
right after the bee stung you.

But the bee stung you.
It barely touched me.

The stinger went
right through me,
and you got all the poison.

My new spleen came from a guy
who liked to motorcycle.
[ Imitating motorcycle revving ]

Sweet three-toed sloth
of ice planet hoth!
She's awake!

- [ All cheer ]
- you were in the best coma
I've ever seen!

- The doctor said
you'd never wake up.
- Really? How long was I out?

Two weeks. Fry never left
your side for a minute.

And he talked nonstop.
Like a parrot of the sea,
he was.

I thought maybe if you heard
a familiar voice, it might
help keep your mind together.

But who knows if it
really got through?

It got through, fry.

It got through.

[ Leela ] you could
really use a shower.
[ Fry] you too.
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