04x19 - One Plus Tutor Is Three

[bunniefuu]

Punky...

is that you?

Uh, yeah.

I thought only Superman
had X-ray vision.

I'll be in my room.

Not so fast.

Don't you have something
to show me?

Oh, I don't know.
What would you like to see?

How about a report card
with nothing but As on it?

Would you settle for a drawing
of Brandon I did at recess?

I wanna see that
report card right now.

Okay, no problem.
Just sign right here.

You mind if I read it first?

Okay, if you give me a two
minute head start to my room?

Sit, young lady!

Uh-oh.

You only call me young lady

when my room is messy,
when I won't eat beets.

- And when you're failing math.
- And when I'm failing math.

How did you know?

Punky, I'm a parent.
We know about these things.

Besides your teacher called.

A "D."

Alright, let's have it.

How long do I have
to stay in my room?

You're not going to your room.

Oh, no,
you're sending me to the home

for kids who fail math.

Your teacher and I
have discussed it at length.

We're arranging for you
to have a tutor.

- A tutor?
- Hm.

That's worse than beets.

It's for your own good.

He should be here any minute.

He's your age
and his name is Walker Wembly.

- Walker Wembly?
- Mm-hm.

Sounds like a geek to me.

He's not a geek.
He's a mathematical genius.

Geniuses are always geeks.

It's a law of nature.

That should be him right now.

Be polite and try to
learn something.

I'll say hello
and go and read in my room.

No, no, Henry! You can't leave
me alone with some geeky nerd.

Okay, okay.

Hello, you must be Walker.

Yes, sir.

What a great name.

This is Punky
and this is Walker Wembly.

Hi, Walker.

- Hi.
- Bye, Henry.

Uh, if you kids need me,
I'll, uh, be in my room.

Thank you for making him cute.

Well, Punky, what is it about
math that gives you problems?

The numbers.

I see.

I guess we better start
on chapter one.

My teacher says
I'll need a lot of help.

I'll probably need
hundreds of hours of tutoring.

Maybe more.

Aren't you gonna get the door?

Was that the door?
I thought it was my heart.

- Hi, Punky.
- Hi.

W... what are you guys
doing here?

What do you mean,
what are we doing here?

We're supposed to go to the
record store at o'clock.

Margaux's limo's downstairs.

And who's the babe?

This is Walker, my math tutor.

- These are my friends.
- I'm Cherie, her best friend.

I'm Margaux,
her prettiest friend.

Hi.

Well, I know you've gotta run.

Nice meeting you.

Hi.
Did you miss me?

Your friends seem nice.

What friends?

Gee, your eyes are blue.

Thanks.
Now let's talk math.

Are you wearing contacts
or little pieces of the sky?

Huh?

I said would you like
a little piece of pie?

Uh, no, thanks.

Let's get started
on percents and ratios.

Maybe this'll turn out to be
more than just math lessons.

Why? Are you slow in history
and English too?

No, I was just trying
to be funny.

Oh, I enjoy girls
with a sense of humor.

You like parties?

Sure. I don't need
tutoring for them.

Great. I'm having a party
next Saturday.

- I'd love to come.
- Good deal.

By the way, there'll be
more guys than girls.

- So bring your friends.
- Sure, we'll be there.

Thank you, Brandon.

Of course,
I know what I'm doing.

I fixed this thing
a hundred times.

Henry, close your eyes
and follow me.

Prepare to have your socks
knocked off.

Hm.

Ta-da!

Oh, you girls look so grown up.

Ah, Henry, every time
I get dressed up for a party,

you get misty-eyed.

No, I get nervous.

You aren't gonna
wanna chaperone, are you?

Of course not.
I wanna ride shotgun.

You even said yourself
that Walker's a nice boy

and a genius.

That's before I knew
he was also a babe.

Cherie, I'm so nervous.

This isn't
tutor-student anymore.

He's man, I'm woman.

I heard that.
The party's off.

Oh, come on, you old prude.

Punky didn't mean it that way.

How did you mean it?

I don't know what I mean.

When I think of Walker,
I get brain meltdown.

Punky, let me give you
a little advice about men.

This should be good.

You haven't had a date
since the victory dance

at Valley Forge.

Yeah, and you were too old
for the army even then.

Honey, the most important thing
about dealing with men

is not to seem too anxious.

Uh-huh.

On the other hand,

you definitely want him
to know you're interested.

Uh-huh.

But in a lady-like sort of way.

She means be cool, be caz,

and, like, never let him
see you sweat.

Gotcha.

Yoo-hoo!

The belle of the ball is here.
Our limo awaits.

- Bye, Henry.
- Bye, sweetheart.

- Have fun. Be good.
- Well, make up your mind.

Only kidding.
Only kidding. Bye!

Bye.

Punky, you might have
better luck with Walker

if you're on the same side
of the room.

Yeah, but I can't just go up
and start talking

like he was
a normal human being.

He smiled and waved.

Hi.

I'm Myron.

I don't suppose either of you
want to dance with me?

- No way.
- No way.

Okay, I'll check you
off my list.

Great idea.

I've changed my mind.
Let's dance.

Okay, let me just erase
your check mark.

Whoo! Dancing sure
makes me thirsty.

Yeah, me too.

I sure could use some punch.

Yeah, me too.

Well, don't you think
you should get us some?

Oh, right.
That's a man's work, isn't it?

- Hi.
- Hi. Great party.

Yeah, I'm glad you came.

- You are?
- Sure.

So how'd you do
on your last math exam?

I got a C plus.

I owe it all to you.

- You're a terrific teacher.
- Thanks.

Uh, Punky, I've got something
really important to tell you.

You do?

Did you ever meet someone

that you really flipped
over immediately?

I sure have.

And did you find yourself

thinking about the person
all the time?

- Absolutely.
- Great.

That's the way
I feel about Margaux.

I'm totally crazy-mad-nuts
about her.

Margaux?

You... you're crazy-mad-nuts
about Margaux?

Why?

Are you kidding?

She's beautiful and rich

and smart and beautiful.

You said that already.

I just think she's great

and I don't know
how to tell her.

Will you tell her for me?

You want me to tell Margaux
that you like her?

Yeah, and could you also mention
that I'm pretty cool?

You want me to tell her
that you're cool too?

Yeah. You think
I'm pretty cool, don't you?

That's not exactly the word
I had in mind.

Then you'll do it?

- I'll think about it.
- Well, could you think fast?

I wanna take her to
the movies tomorrow night.

E... excuse me, may I cut in?

Boy, when it rains, it pours.

Punky, what are you doing?

- Walker likes Margaux.
- No!

Yes, and he wants me to tell her
how cool he is

so she'll go to the movies
with him tomorrow.

That slimeball!

What should I do?

Dump bean dip on him.

Nah, it's not really his fault
he likes Margaux instead of me.

She's beautiful
and rich and smart.

You're smart.

Well, not at math.
You need a tutor for that.

But you're certainly
just as beautiful.

- Oh, thanks.
- In a cuter sort of way.

You may not be rich,
but you do, like,

have your own frog phone.

I might as well
go talk to Margaux.

Margaux, Walker's crazy-mad-nuts
about you.

He thinks you're beautiful
and he wants to take you

to the movies tomorrow.

An admirer? How wonderful.

How romantic.

Who's Walker?

My math tutor.

Oh, the ordinary one.

He's not ordinary,
he's gorgeous.

And sweet and smart
and funny and kind

and... hot for you.

Very well, I'll talk to him.

Terrific.

Hey, I thought you liked him?

That jerk? No way.

Punky will be home soon.

You've gotta learn
to let go, boy.

She's growing up.

Learning about life,
meeting young men...

who I will hunt down
and destroy.

Henry, the girls are back.

Oh, so early?

Did you have a good time?

It was okay.

Just okay?

Well, I had a great time...

but poor Punky
had her heart stomped on.

Sweetheart, what happened?

Are you alright?

Punky will be fine.

Young hearts mend quickly.

- Come on, Cherie.
- Goodnight.

Goodnight.

Would it help
if we talked about it?

I don't think so.

Oh, it sure would help me.

Please tell me what happened.

Walker invited me to his party
just so he could meet Margaux.

- That's not very nice.
- It was disgusting.

I watched him make goo-goo eyes
at her all night.

Yes, goo-goo eyes
can be disgusting.

And then they played
marshmallow on a string.

You know, the kissing game?

Uh, tell me, dear, uh,

were you playing
this marshmallow game?

Get real, Henry.

It was bad enough
having to watch.

Well, I'm sorry
that this party turned out

to be so unpleasant for you.

Henry, life stinks.

Well, maybe
it isn't always fair,

but believe me,

life has a way of balancing
these things out.

Henry, life will never
balance this one out

even if I live
to be as old as you.

Oh, Brandon,
you brought me a gift.

A Twinkie to cheer me up.

I know you were saving
this one for yourself.

Aww.

A card?

"Your heart is broken,
but don't feel blue.

Brandon's still here
and he loves you."

Aw, thanks, pal.

Punky, wanna go to the mall?

They're giving away free samples
at Chubby's Chocolate Emporium.

Sounds great, but I've gotta
study this afternoon.

Oh, I can't go
to the mall either.

Walker's coming over for a date.

Well, aren't you dying to know
what we're gonna do?

Not really.

Of course, you are.

First, we're having high tea
in the garden

with mommy and daddy.

Wowee!

Then we're going
to a big charity fundraiser.

A Rolls Royce demolition derby.

Sounds like a crashing bore.

I don't blame you two
for being jealous.

My first serious romance
and I found the perfect man.

Punky, thank you for bringing

Walky and me together.

You and Walky are welcome.

We love so many
of the same things.

Ballet, the opera, museums.

We've become inseparable.

Well, you better go.

You don't wanna keep
Walky waiting.

Oh, he loves waiting for me.

Even when my hair won't behave

and I have to spend an extra
three or four hours on it.

What a guy.

He sure is.

Punky, I hope
someday you're lucky enough

to find someone like Walker.

Margaux, do you have any idea
what you're saying?

Of course not.
Should I?

Punky's been in love
with Walker all along.

But you told me
you thought he was a jerk.

She only did that to be nice.

Well, that's always a mistake.

I'm afraid it's too late
to give him back now.

Walker and I are deeply in love.

Who is it?

- It's Walker.
- Oh, I know what he wants.

It's our one week anniversary

and I bet he's dying
to buy me a gift.

He should die.

He must want a hint from you
on what to buy.

Come on, Cherie.
I'll drop you at the mall.

This sounds more interesting
than the mall.

I'll leave you with three words
for your hint.

Diamonds are forever.

Come on, Cherie.

I think I'll just hang around
Punky's kitchen.

Maybe feed the old face.

That's no refrigerator.

You're eavesdropping.

Right. Care to join me?

Punky, I've got to talk to you.

Margaux isn't here, is she?

No, and I've got three words
for you.

Diamonds are forever.

- Huh?
- Goodbye.

Wait, not yet.
I have something to ask you.

I got tickets
to the Sting concert.

Would you like to go?

- Me?
- Yeah.

- With you?
- Yeah.

What about Margaux?

Yeah, what about Margaux?

I thought you were
crazy-mad-nuts about her.

No, I'm sick,
bored and tired of her.

She's so bossy.

Our Margaux? Really?

Yeah, the stupid things
she makes me do.

Operas, tea parties.

She won't even play video games.
She's afraid she'll chip a nail.

And all she talks about
is money.

She even asked my dad for a copy
of his stock portfolio.

That's Margaux.

I know.

Punky, I made a big mistake

and I'm man enough to admit it.

I realize now
there's someone else I like.

- Who?
- You.

Me?

That's right.

Punky, I'm sorry.

All that blond hair blinded me.

In other words, first,
you used me to get to Margaux.

Now you don't like her.
You like me.

And you wanna get rid of her?

You've got it.
Let's dump her.

You rat!

If Margaux knew how
you felt, it would destroy her.

No, it wouldn't.
It would destroy him.

Margaux baby.

Uh, y... you wouldn't throw
an egg at me.

Of course not.
I'm too much of a lady for that.

Phew.

But not for this.

Take a walk, Walker.

You don't wanna hang around
with egg on your face.

Margaux, what are you and Cherie
still doing here?

- Eavesdropping.
- Eavesdropping.

Punky, I heard everything.

Thanks for the way
you stood up for me.

That's Punky.

You know, you may not
be a whiz at math,

but when it comes to friends,
you get an A plus.