02x15 - Otto Suwen/A Reason to Believe

[bunniefuu]

"Instead"?!

Yes.

Where's the old hag?

I couldn't foresee what would happen,

so I had her go elsewhere.

And what the hell are you still doin' here?

You wanna "talk things over," but the one you wanna talk to ain't even here!

That's true.

So I guess we'll just say I'm buying time so a certain boy and girl can be alone for a while.

Oh, really?!

You ain't got what it takes, small fry.

The stone—

Damn it...

Is this what you're looking for?

A merchant always keeps one step ahead to ascertain his chances of success,

and that's what I am.

You piece of...

I've never had very many human friends,

but I made lots of non-human friends instead.

The entire forest is against you now.

Enjoy this welcome from the zodda bugs first!

Damn it... Damn it!

Damn it!

When I was a young boy,

the world was a hellish cradle.

No matter where I went, I heard endless voices,

but had no idea what any of them were saying.

At that age, I had no way to know that this was the blessing I was born with,

the "soul of language" divine protection.

Wait up!

Otto, what are you doing?

You're not going to play with them?

My parents tried their hardest to understand my abnormality,

but any who don't have a divine protection can never understand.

Otto, try writing it.

It was my brother, seven years my senior,

who realized that written words might bring about that understanding

when spoken words couldn't.

Otto...

That may have been the first time I'd cried out since I was born.

Then when I turned ten...

Big... light... went... that way...

Those meaningless voices started to transform into sounds with meaning.

You can understand what animals say?

Yeah.

Rain... fall soon. Rain soon.

They say it's going to rain soon.

Huh?

Otto, that's an amazing power.

And because it's so amazing,

you shouldn't talk to zodda bugs when people are around.

Why not?

Divine protections are blessings granted by this world,

but there are people who would try to take advantage of it.

You have to keep your power hidden.

That's why I can't talk to you around other people anymore, Fulfew.

I understand, Young Master.

Liar!

Liar! Liar!

You're just a liar!

We know it's all lies!

You're so lying!

I'm not lying!

My big brother Otto can talk to animals!

Can't you, Otto?!

It's true!

Zodda bugs!

Oh, no! Zodda bugs!

You zodda bug freak!

After that, I sealed my divine protection

and swore never to use it again.

Then when I was fifteen...

You son of a bitch! I know you were with my girlfriend!

W-Wait a—

Shut the hell up, you zodda bug freak!

Zodda bug... freak?

I'm gonna find out the truth!

I saw.

I know the truth!

You're the eighth guy she's been with!

You jerk!

Someone k*ll him!

I made an enemy of the daughter of the most powerful person in town,

and they ran me out.

After that, I unexpectedly found my independence as a merchant,

and I busted my butt working.

I made up my mind that I'd run my own shop one day.

You can do it, Otto!

Go, go, Otto!

Well, well, well...

Where are you off to in such a...

hurry?!

You're one lucky boy.

You woulda been k*lled if I hadn't found ya.

Better be grateful to the boss kid.

B-Boss... kid?

Yeah, he's our boss.

And he's the guy who saved your life.

I-I understand. Thank you very much.

And I should thank him, too.

If yer gonna cry, go hide first.

No man should start sobbin' in front of anyone.

Huh? C-Cry?

Darn it...

What is this?

This... Th-This...

I... I'm so glad I didn't die...

I realized that every time I cry, it marks a rebirth in my life.

My first cry as a baby after receiving life...

My second cry after learning

of my family's love and realizing where my heart lay...

And this day, the third, when I had a brush with death,

and gained an understanding of my purpose and reason for living.

I wasn't actually asked to buy time this way...

But it's all to help my friend!

...coming! Coming!

Bad one coming!

I know that!

Right behind you. Already here.

I said I know that!

I planned for it! It's all part of the calculation!

You're going to die. Poor thing.

Could you please stop being so pessimistic?!

Is this what happens when I keep using it?

My divine protection is such a hassle.

I wonder if Natsuki-san... is getting his chance to talk to Emilia-sama.

Found ya!

Damn you!

I was given a really exciting role to play for once!

I'm not letting you catch me that easily!

Come on, give me a break...

I don't think so!

I'm not lettin' you pull any of your sh*t again!

I... I wouldn't be so sure...

This fight isn't over ye—

I told you, I'm not lettin' you pull any sh*t!

Frankly, you surprised me.

I seriously never woulda thought you had it in ya.

You'll hafta forgive me for doin' somethin' so shitty to a man.

I think I've done all I could.

Gimme the stone back right now!

Enough already, damn it!

A'right, then. When you wake up, this'll all be—

Let's just say my personal battle ends here.

Ram!

El Fula!

Cocky bitch!

Not that I didn't know it, but you're so pathetic, I couldn't watch.

Isn't that a little harsh toward someone who just gave all he had fighting?

All you had? In the state you're in?

I've never seen a maid as well-described as the polar opposite of soothing!

Hey, Ram, doesn't joining their side mean

you're goin' against what that bastard Roswaal wants?

I would give my very soul to fulfill my master's fondest desire.

But...

in my own way.

Cut the sh*t!

What do you think is happenin' while you keep me here?!

You really think he's worth trustin' that much?!

Is Natsuki-san worth it?

Well, if we're talking about whether he's worth anything,

I suppose he's not.

Huh?!

But I look forward to seeing what flowers bloom from him,

so I keep pruning and brushing off the bugs...

I suppose that's the mood I'm in now.

Hmph. Frankly, I have no idea what gives you such high hopes for Barusu.

He's weak, useless, and so incompetent, he can't even make tea right.

That's going a bit too far... or maybe not, actually.

But... when it's do or die,

he has bizarrely good timing.

A man who only has good timing.

That's what Barusu is.

If he believes he sees an opportunity and acts on it,

you know that's the only path to victory.

I guess when all's said and done, you trust Natsuki-san too, Ram-san.

That's "Ram-sama."

That's such a hostile way to hide your shyness!

Enough!

Stay back.

Wait... Ram-san!

Have you ever once beaten me in a punch-out?

No... way...

You've gotten stronger, Garf.

Al Fula!

I'm counting on you, Otto. Please don't do anything crazy.

Now...

I'm going to do my part.

Oh, good. I finally found you.

You really thought this through, didn't you, Emilia-tan?

You knew no one would find you if you holed up in here.

Why... are you here, Subaru? You don't...

...get forced back as hard as Roswaal?

I mean, I'm here, but I'm fighting pretty hard to endure.

I... see...

Half of me believed you'd be here, and half of me just wished for it.

Half... and half...

I'm so relieved that I found you.

Just... relieved?

You're not angry?

What's this about, Emilia-tan?

Were you actually afraid I'd be mad at you?

I'm not angry.

Though I did panic, and frankly, I wasn't even sure I was alive.

I see. You're not angry.

Emilia?

You're not angry at me, Subaru.

You won't even get angry.

Why won't you get angry?

What I did was selfish, wasn't it?

It caused trouble for you, didn't it?

I worried you by leaving without saying anything.

Are you not angry because you d-didn't expect anything in the first place?

You're kind to me even when I mess up

because you're not even disappointed in me, right?

Because you know it's never going to go right?

No, Emilia! That's not what I think!

Then...

Then why?

Why didn't you keep your promise?!

You and Puck both broke your word and went away.

You went away and left me behind.

You're a liar.

Puck is a liar.

Liar...

You liar...

Emilia...

You shouldn't... break a promise...

You shouldn't lie!

It's wrong!

Emilia...

I love you.

Huh?

Night after night, you go rushing into the same damn trial over and over.

What the hell is that trial, anyway? It's just the past!

Don't keep moping over stuff that's over and done with!

Uh, wha...

When I tried to do it for you, you insisted that only you could do it.

So when you blow it, that just means you were all talk!

S-Subaru...

And in the end, when your pet and guardian takes off,

you abandon your duties and run off to sulk and cry your eyes out?

I can't put up with it any longer!

You're right.

It only makes sense that you'd think of me that way.

But still...

I love you, Emilia.

I love you.

I love you so, so, so much, I don't know what to do with myself.

Wh-Where did all this come from?

I love that beautiful silver hair of yours,

I love those damp purple jewels you have for eyes.

I love your voice and how just hearing it puts me in a trance.

Your long, slender arms and legs, your pale skin,

and your height are all so perfect to me that I can't stand it.

Just being with you makes my heart race out of control.

It's scary, honestly.

I love how you're a little absent-minded, too.

The way you give everything your all is adorable,

and I respect the way you do your best to help others.

It's hard to leave you alone when I see you putting others before yourself.

I want to see all the expressions you make from right here beside you.

Th-This is no time for...

Stop playing around!

Why are you suddenly saying all this?!

That's not what we were talking about!

You were saying that I'm utterly useless,

that you couldn't put up with me!

Yeah, you're right.

So why would you forgive me for being so useless?!

If that answer is all you want, I've said it over and over!

It's because I love you!

I'm head-over-heels in love with you!

Everything about you shines in my eyes!

Yeah, of course, parts of you aren't perfect.

You're not an angel or a goddess. You're an ordinary girl.

You'll feel so bad that you want to cry sometimes,

and you'll want to run away from things that hurt! I get that!

But even including that weakness and the parts you might even call ugly...

I love every part of your being, Emilia.

That's just... t-too selfish!

You just named all the things that make me useless,

and you still say you love me?

How can you expect me to believe you?!

You're wrong! You've got it completely wrong!

It's not because I believe in you that I love you!

I believe in you because I love you!

Just loving someone isn't a reason to believe in them!

If just loving you isn't a reason to believe in you...

Then who the hell would willingly go through all this suffering

to come and help a pain in the ass like you?!

I love you so much it makes me crazy!

I love you so much I could die!

That's why I put up with the pain and suffering!

Even now, I feel like I might puke, but I'm still standing in front of you!

I never asked you to do that!

You're just being selfish!

You're not thinking about my feelings at all!

You have no idea how I feel every time I see you

getting hurt because of me!

How would I know?! I don't even think about it!

All I think about is how to look good in front of you!

I'm suffering for you here!

At least try to look as cute as I hoped you would!

Don't talk like I'm just some doll!

Why did you break your promise?!

If you'd just done what I asked you to, that would've been enough!

Why wouldn't you even do that?!

You actually hate me, don't you?!

I love you!

Liar!

I'm not lying! I love you!

Then...

Why?

Why did you break your promise?

I can't tell you.

If you'd stayed with me until morning like you promised,

I think I could have believed you.

I could have believed you and entrusted you with everything.

But you...

Since Puck left, my memories have been slowly coming back.

Sights in my mind that I don't recognize...

Conversations I don't remember...

More and more of them keep coming back.

I thought I remembered everything all this time,

but I went and forgot them, as if they never existed.

When all the memories come back,

what's going to happen to me?

Is this me... really me?

I forgot so many important things.

I even forgot about Mother.

And yet... I'm not wrong?

What matters isn't how you start or what happens in the middle.

It's how it ends.

Yeah... you're right, Mom.

No matter what memories you get back,

it won't change anything.

I love you.

I'm always going to love you.

I can't believe that.

If the me that you say you love... g-goes away, could you still...

I could.

No matter what happens, you're not going to go away.

I love you.

But you're a liar!

You wouldn't make me believe you.

Then I'll make you believe me now.

Suba—

If you don't want this, then dodge.

I love you.

No matter how many hopeless sides of you I see,

and even if we argue like this...

I'm never going to stop loving you.

That won't change, no matter what happens.

I'll just love you even more than before.

That's why I'll always believe in you.

And if you want to know why...

Because... you love me?

With all those unfamiliar memories flooding you,

it's only natural that you'd feel anxious and scared.

But the path you've walked until now won't go away.

You're going to be fine.

How can you say that for sure?

What matters isn't how you start.

It's how it ends.

The woman I respect the most in the whole world said so.

You'll be fine, Emilia.

I'm on your side.

It's okay if you remember everything.

And if you're still scared, we'll find it.

Find... what?

Just like my feelings for you make me able to keep running forward,

you'll find your most precious feeling, the one that makes you able to blow away

all the anxieties and run forward.

Of course, I'd like to hope that precious feeling will be for me.

My most... precious feeling...

I wonder if it's among all these memories I've been getting back.

My most precious feeling...

Yeah, I'm sure it is.

Your reason to keep walking is there.

Yeah.

Hey. Sorry to keep you waiting.

Ain't like I was waitin' for you.