02x12 - The Slump

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Felicity". Aired: September 29, 1998 –; May 22, 2002.*
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Follows Felicity to NYC after high school as she navigates life and discovers who she really is.
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02x12 - The Slump

Post by bunniefuu »

ANNOUNCER:
Previously on Felicity...

(LAUGHS) We're dead
if someone catches us.

Nobody's gonna catch us.

GUARD: Hello?

Do you two understand that
you're both in serious trouble?

Once Mom gets here,

she'll start trying to get me
into Tuesday dinners again.

And she'll want to go
shopping all the time...

Mom's not moving here.

What?

We're separating.

Dear Sally...

I'm in trouble.

(OPERA PLAYS)

Excuse me.

I'm looking for
Professor Papalian?

Oh, yeah, sure. He's not here.

Oh. Um...

He's on leave. Indefinite leave.

Can I help you with something?

(CHORUS SINGS OPERA)

Um... No.

I guess not.

Okay.

(MUSIC STOPS)

Oh, damn it!

(CLANGING)

Oh, damn it!

Is he okay?

Yeah, yeah! Just a family thing.

What, are you one
of his students?

No. He was my counselor.

Oh. All right, then. That's me.

I'm filling in for
him while he's gone.

I'm Toni Pavone.

Felicity Porter.

Oh, yeah.

Porter.

You're in trouble.

Close the door. Sit down.

"Broke into the pool."
You broke into the pool?

Drinking.

Ben Covington.

Why did you break into the pool?

I don't know. I...

(OPERA PLAYS)

It was a really stupid and

immature thing to do,

and we're both very sorry.

Well, that's good.

Uh...

Are we gonna be expelled?

1986, a sophomore
named Miles Adler

went out drinking with his
frat buddies, you know, guys,

and they broke into
the pool just like you.

And this Adler kid, who's
wasted out of his mind,

dives in the shallow
end, smacks his head,

lands in a coma for 15 days.

It cost the university a couple
hundred grand in legal bills,

articles in the
paper, you know...

Do you know this?

Uh, no.

Monteverdi.

It's nice.

Okay. So, technically, you
vandalized the school property

under the influence of alcohol.

We have a zero tolerance policy,

which means in addition
to your punishment,

you're gonna have to start
alcohol treatment counseling.

Oh, my God.

How is Wednesday at 3:00?

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Hi.

Sorry I'm late.

Who are you?

Ben Covington.

You're in trouble.

Close the door. Sit down.

(THEME SONG PLAYING)

The fact is, I'm actually lucky.

I mean, if my parents
ever had to break up,

I mean, for me, this is
the best possible time.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Imagine if this had
happened years ago

when you were tutoring me.

I would have
probably lost my mind.

I would've obsessed over it.

♪ We walked
alone beside the park

♪ And talked about your shoes...

FELICITY: But now, I mean,
it doesn't really affect me

the way that it would have.

I mean, my everyday life
is... Basically the same.

♪ I wanted to show you

♪ Right or wrong ♪

You know what?

Screw Toni Pavone.

What?

What, we're gonna take
alcohol counseling now?

It's so stupid.

I know. It's ridiculous.

And another thing,
that lady, she stinks.

It's like old
cigarettes. It's nasty.

Yeah, well, you
still have to go.

No, I don't.
College is an option.

Look, they took away swimming,

and now I gotta go
to alcohol counseling.

Well, I'm not
doing it. Forget it.

What are you gonna do, leave?

Yeah. I'm thinking about it.

Hey, honey.

Hey.

I was thinking about tonight.

I don't know. Are you in
the mood for Italian food?

It really doesn't matter, Dad.

I'll just choose a place.

What time does Mom get in?

5:00.

Can I get you
something? A coffee?

Yeah, sure.

Bach believed

that women had
the ability to reason,

that they should be
given an equal voice...

Which was a shocking
idea for England in the 1600s

and probably for a few
people here today, huh?

All right. I will have your
tests graded by Tuesday.

You guys have a good weekend.

Hey.

You were so good.

You're so much better!

I saw it.

What?

The, uh... The hi note.

Oh, you did?

Why'd you do that?

What? I was just saying hi.

We say hi all the time.

Do you have to do it on the
bluebook of the anonymous test?

I don't understand.
What's the big deal?

It's anonymous.

You asked me not to give
you any special treatment.

Don't give me any
special treatment.

Well, I have to. How can I not?

Are you saying that I did
that to get a better grade?

All I know is now
when I read it,

it's not just a paper.
It's my girlfriend's paper.

Well, that's an easy fix.

Ruby, come on...

(SOPRANO SINGS)

I think this might
be a waste of time.

What's that?

This. Alcohol abuse counseling.

I mean, I don't drink.

Says here you drink.

I drank. I don't drink.

Why'd you drink?

I told you.

You were just blowing off steam?

That's right.

Where'd the steam come from?

I just found out my
parents are splitting up.

That's all it is.

You wanna tell me about that?

Uh, it's not that big of a deal.

I mean, it happens
to everyone, right?

No.

Well, it's gonna be fine.

I mean... Tonight, we're...

all having dinner, and...

How's that gonna go?

It's gonna go fine.

Yeah?

Yeah. You know, I understand

that you're trying to
get me to say something

revelatory or whatever,
but, you know...

If this is about figuring
out my punishment,

just look at my record.

You can see that this isn't
the type of thing I do usually.

Take a look.

I'm a real pro. A therapist.

Licensed.

So when you're ready...

Come back and we'll talk.

I never caught my
parents having sex,

but this must be
what it feels like,

getting a glimpse into
your parents' intimate life,

seeing something that
you know is happening,

but you don't want
to think about at all.

Uh, how was your flight?

Turbulent.

So was ours.

I... How are your...

Go ahead. No, you go.

I made appointments for
us tomorrow at Cascades.

They have this body wrap
there called The Escape.

It's supposed to be so relaxing.

Great. Okay.

Don Laberts called
this afternoon.

He'll be there on Thursday.

What time does that start?

Um, early. 7:00.

It's just one of those
embarrassing in-honor-of dinners.

It'll be over by 9:00.

You are gonna go, right?

Yes.

Ravioli sounds good.

Is that what you're having?

Barbara?

I don't know.

What are you gonna
do, sweetheart?

Um...

Felicity.

I'm sorry.

Barbara, um...

What's going on, sweetheart?
What's happening?

FELICITY: Nothing. I
told her what's going on.

He didn't tell me. He just...

It was a slip. It was
a mistake. I'm sorry.

Honey...

It's okay, Mom. It's okay.

It's not okay. I wanted to
tell you myself in person.

When did you do this?

Last week.

You did this a week ago?

You say "you did this" like it
was some sort of premeditated act.

BARBARA: Well, it was certainly
a very aggressive thing to do.

EDWARD: An aggressive thing.
Is that you talking or Carolyn?

BARBARA: Oh, do
not bring up Carolyn.

EDWARD: Why don't
you make me a list

of the things I can
and cannot bring up.

(VOICES FADE)

(CHORUS SINGS)

(TYPING)

(CHORUS SINGS)

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

DR. PAVONE: Come in!

(SONG PLAYS)

Can I, uh, talk to
you for a minute?

Close the door. Sit down.

♪ Where do I go

I don't know who I am anymore...

♪ When it's all blown over

How I got here. I don't...

I don't know what I'm doing.

I don't know why I'm here.

♪ When it's all gone to the dogs

I've been in
relationships that I don't

really understand. I...

I hate my haircut. I...

I dropped pre-med like it
was some kind of victory, and...

I can't even remember
why it felt like that.

♪ Where do I hide

Sorry.

Don't be sorry. It's okay.

♪ From the careless
words you speak ♪

I didn't realize how
much I depend on them...

My parents just being there.

I mean, even though
I'm 3,000 miles away, I...

I depend on them.

I'm an only child, so that's
probably what all this is.

Did you say any of this to them?

No.

I just kinda let them talk.

They said they were
having difficulties and that...

That it was for the best.

I guess I just feel responsible.

How are you responsible?

I'm pretty sure that
it disrupted things...

My coming here, and...

Pushing them away.

I mean, if I hadn't
left Palo Alto. If I'd...

If I hadn't been so selfish,

they'd probably
still be together.

What was selfish
about you coming here?

What do you mean?

Why did you come here?

Oh... Pff.

Basically because Ben
Covington came here.

Hmm.

You came for Ben?

At first, yeah.

And then I thought
it was for me. That...

That maybe I'd find
myself or something.

I just don't understand.

What?

Well, they were here
for Thanksgiving, and...

They looked so hap... Well...

They looked happy, and...

I was home over Christmas,
and everything seemed fine.

I just don't understand
why they're breaking up.

I thought you said
it was 'cause of you.

Hey!

Hey.

So if you don't go
see Dr. Pavone,

you're gonna get expelled.

Oh, yeah? She's a doctor?

Psychologist.

I guess she went to Yale.

Yale. Big deal.

You still thinking
about dropping out?

Yeah, a little bit.

I checked out the Voice.
They got ads in the back.

You can get a courier ticket
to Prague for 200 bucks.

A courier ticket?

Yeah. It's a steal.

You gotta leave last minute
and you can only take one bag,

but the ticket's really cheap.

Well, let me know
if you're really going,

'cause I should
probably go with you.

I'm kidding.

Well, you know,
if you wanted to,

if you decided to
do that, then I'd do it.

Come on!

No, I'm serious. That's
what we gotta do.

Go see Dr. Pavone.

No. Let's drop out together.

Go see Dr. Pavone!

Dr. Pavone. Come on!
Think about it. It'll be fun.

I am such an ass.

Can you confirm that for
me, that I'm an ass, please?

I just read your essay,
and it was fantastic!

I'm not kidding. It was
one of the best in the class,

and I was thinking to myself...

"Could I have been
more of an ass?"

Doesn't matter.

Okay, which is sort of a
confirmation, but I deserve it,

because I was treating you like I didn't
think you could write what you wrote,

which was excellent. It was.

You hate my guts?

I gotta go get ready for
customs of czarist Russia.

ELENA: It is a problem.

A real serious problem.

Is anybody listening to me?

What?

My lab partner. What's
wrong with you guys?

I'm writing lyrics. What
rhymes with column?

Have you guys ever
heard of courier tickets?

Slalom.

Yeah, Ben was
talking about those.

ELENA: Listen! Slalom...

His name is Tracy.

I thought he would be
a girl. He is not a girl.

He's way too cute to be a girl.

Is he available?

I don't know. And I
don't wanna know.

I'm telling you,
if I find out he is,

I'll get no work done,
and I'll fail chemistry!

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Come in.

Hi.

GIRLS: Hi.

Can we... Can we talk?

Food?

Oh, yeah, um... Do you want
something from the corner?

No, I'm okay.

Bye. Bye.

Bye. Would you like something?

No, thank you.

So how are you?

Uh... Good.

I had a meeting
with Dean Alison.

They want me to come guest
lecture at the medical school.

Really? Yeah.

I just learned about
your incident at the pool.

Oh. And now you're in
alcohol abuse counseling?

Dad, that's just policy.

It was a little embarrassing

learning that your daughter
had been caught swimming drunk

on university property.

It was... It was just the night
after you told me about...

You and Mom, and...

I don't know.

That stupid prank is
gonna come at a real cost.

I know. That's why
I'm in counseling.

What sort of punishment are
they discussing? I don't know.

Well, what did
your counselor say?

I don't know!

Mom's not coming on Thursday...

To my dinner,

and I know you were
planning on going.

Dad, the hospital's
honoring you.

Of course I'm gonna go.

Mom's only here
for a couple of days.

I think it'd be good

for both of you to spend
some time together.

I'm not as good as she is at...

Anyway.

Dad...

Go with her on Thursday.

Please.

Okay.

Okay.

BARBARA: No. I want
you to go with Dad.

But you're only going
to be here for a few days.

It's a special
night for you father.

I know how much
he wants you there.

So, then why don't all
three of us just go together?

Because I'm angry at your father

and because he's angry at me.

Please, just go with him.

But even he said it's just one of
those stupid in-honor-of dinners.

He didn't mean that.

He loves those
things. You know that.

Go with your father
on Thursday, please,

or I'll never
hear the end of it.

Mom?

Yeah?

I'm sorry.

What for?

For everything.

You apologized to them?

Yeah.

Oh, boy.

What?

What did they say?

Uh, they told
me not to be silly.

Good. Points for the parents.

And you're not pissed
off about any of this?

No. I'm just...
I'm a little tense.

Hmm. Tense but not angry.

Not everyone gets angry.

That's true.

Many people who are
repressed and out of touch

insist that they are just tense.

What are you...
What are you saying?

It would just be nice to
see who you really are

under there.

Under what?

This whole act. This whole
polite thing that you do.

Well, I'm sorry,
but this is who I am.

No. Come on.

First of all, you're not sorry.

Secondly, you told me yourself
you don't know who you are.

You have no idea. You don't
know why you came here...

That's not true. I told
you why I came here.

Oh, to follow a guy?
No. I don't buy that.

You're too smart for that,

and you're too screwed
up not to be a little bit angry.

Are you angry?

No.

Well, then why the hell not?

All your life, you have been

your mother and
father's little centerpiece.

You go home for Christmas.

They make you think that
everything is nice and normal.

And then your father
gets on a plane,

and comes back with you
to start to work at a hospital

that is affiliated with the
college that you're attending.

He did ask my opinion.

Oh, baloney. It
was after the fact.

Then he spills the beans that and
he and your mother are breaking up,

but he doesn't bother to tell his
wife that he's told his daughter,

a huge burden for you to bear,

then your mother
finds out that you know.

She's furious with your father.

Your father's
already fuming at her.

You're caught
right in the middle.

"Go with Mom." "Go with Dad."

This is a sporting
event. This is martyr ball!

They've got the sticks,
and you're the puck,

and you're telling
me you're not angry?

Well, how does it feel?

What?

To be the good little girl.

You know, I don't
know if I like this.

No. Seriously...

How does it feel?


Because it is annoying
as hell to watch.

You sitting there
like a little cupie doll,

denying what you're really
going through, not only...

Fine. I'm angry.

Well, you should be.

All right, I am. Well, why?

Because everything's a
little screwed up right now

and because my mom's leaving
and I don't understand why

and my dad's moving here,
and I don't want him here.

Of course you don't.

And I'm mad at the position
my parents have put me in.

Yeah, I'm a little mad.

I'm a little pissed off.

Good.

So I've done some research.

About what?

About our trip.

Our trip?

Yeah.

"Vienna.

"Monumental sites as awesome
as any in London, Paris, or Rome."

You know what we could do? We could
just get, like, a Eurorail pass, right?

That does sound
pretty incredible.

That's the thing. It's
not incredible at all.

It's something we could
actually do that's credible.

We could never
really do it, though.

Why not?

Because, obviously,
I mean, it's us.

What does that mean?

Because we dated we can't
go somewhere together?

I just think it
would be awkward.

All right, what would
be more awkward,

getting on a plane and getting
the hell out of here or staying?

I mean it.

Are you even happy here?
'Cause I don't think you are.

You don't?

No, I don't.

I've been watching you at work.

Listen to me. It's Thursday.

We could get dirt-cheap tickets

to France or Austria or Spain,

and we could be
there by Saturday.

Backpacks, wine, cheese, and no
more stinking, reeking Dr. Pavone.

What are you thinking?

Um...

I'm thinking that my
parents are splitting up.

That's one of the reasons my
dad's moving to New York for a while.

My mom's leaving him.

I didn't know that. I'm sorry.

Yeah. That's okay.

It's fun thinking
about this, though.

It's like the only fun
I'm having right now.

But I don't think
I'm where you're at,

at least not yet.

Here's my problem,

I don't want to care.

I just don't. I wanna
be like every other guy

and just not care.

I know guys like that. You
guys know guys like that.

You might be a guy like that.

I wanna be... I
wanna be like you.

I wanna be that guy whose
girlfriend gives him a crooked look,

and he sort of shrugs and
goes on his way, ya know?

But me? I am a
disaster. I'm freaking out

because Ruby's acting
all distant and disinterested.

I don't know if that's her
reacting the way that she should,

because "screw me,"
or if it's me overreacting.

Because I get the
distinct impression

that we are in a nosedive,

and I have reason to believe
that it's entirely my fault.

I'm Noel, by the way.

Tracy.

Yeah. I heard a lot about you.

I don't mean to take
up your study time,

but I do wanna know what you
guys would do, especially you,

since I'm pretty sure
Elena's advice would be like,

"You're such a geek." So?

Did you apologize to Ruby?

Yes, I did.

And she didn't take it?

No. I mean, uh...

I don't know. It was like

she just ran into an
ex-boyfriend or something.

Hmm. Why don't
you just say, uh...

"Baby, I really am sorry,

"but I want you in my life.

"Now, if you're hurting,

"I want to make it better.

"Whatever it takes"?

That's what I would say

if I got into an argument
with my girlfriend.

I mean, if I had a girlfriend.

God.

What?

Nothing.

Thank you.

You're invited back anytime,

no matter what happens
between you two.

Thank you.

Look...

Ask

anything you want.

But know that

certain questions aren't
going to have clear answers.

There's no other man.

There's no...

No horrible secret.

I'm just trying to
figure out who I am.

Mmm-hmm.

Why can't you do that with Dad?

I just don't think I can.

Well, yesterday you said
you were having difficulties.

Yes.

So what?

I mean, isn't that what happens?

You're in a relationship
with someone for a long time

and you have difficulties
and you deal with it, right?

I don't know what else to do.

Besides break up the family?

I'm sorry you feel that way.

You don't know how it is.

Then explain to me.
Help me understand.

(SIGHS)

I've been in your
father's shadow

ever since the day I met him.

Then why did you get
married in the first place?

It was a very difficult time.

If you really wanted
to finish college

and that's how you felt,

I just... I don't understand.

I don't know what to tell you.

Were you pregnant?

There are so many
reasons why we got married.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Your father and I...

Honey...

So let's drop out.

Baby...

I really am sorry.

(CHUCKLES)

Noel, what are you doing?

Wait. Let me finish.

I want you in my life.

If you're hurting...

What?

I want to make it better.
I'll do whatever it takes.

That's sweet.

Oddly put, but sweet.

What's going on?

They still haven't taken
down their Christmas lights.

Look, I know that it's weird

with me teaching this class,

but we'll get through it.

People have been through
much harder things than this.

I'm late.

What?

And I'm never late.

Um... How late?

Five days.

Five days.

Look, it's probably nothing.

I thought I got my period,
like, three times today.

Okay, so then it
could be nothing.

Unless I'm pregnant.

You're not gonna call
me a baby again, are you?

No.

I was going to tell you that...

Hmm?

No matter what

we're gonna be okay.

I know.

Why Vienna?

You know, it's got, uh,

monumental sites as awesome
as London, Paris, or Rome.

Why did you come here?

That question is
getting so annoying.

I obviously don't
know. That's why...

No, wait. I mean, here.

Today.

If you're leaving,
why'd you come?

Because I wanted to thank you.

What? You could've called.

I wanted to see
you and thank you.

You want me to
talk you out of it?

No, I don't.

Okay, 'cause I'm not going to.

Well, good. I don't want you to.

How'd it go with your folks?

Bad.

How bad?

I really... I don't
want to talk about it.

No, no. You can't say bad...

And then clam up.

How bad?

Horrible.

I haven't felt that
way in a long time.

Since when?

Um...

Since I was a kid.

And what happened
when you were a kid?

(SIGHS)

Nothing. I mean, I
went to ballet camp.

I was 10. It was sleep-away.

I hated it.

I came home a day
early, I hated it so much.

And when I came home,

I realized my mom had been
sleeping in the guest room,

not in her room with my dad.

She saw that I saw and
was so embarrassed,

and my dad, too, and...

They didn't say
anything about it,

and I didn't mention it.

I don't know. It was just...

It was so uncomfortable.

It was that horrible feeling.

(SIGHS)

So that night
at dinner, I, uh...

I told them how much
I loved ballet camp.

I just wanted to
change the subject,

make it all better, and...

Then everything was
back to normal again.

I went to ballet camp
the next four summers.

It's a hard job, isn't it?

Keeping the family happy?

I...

I think, um...

I think that might be it.

Why I...

came here to New York.

I don't blame ya.

Who wouldn't want to
get a break from that?

But, seriously...

Why Vienna?

I don't know.

I just feel so lost here.

Well...

You know, the thing
about being lost...

You can be lost anywhere.

(KNOCKING)

Hey.

Hey.

I called before, and
Meghan answered.

She said you were
packing for Vienna?

Oh, God.

If is this about me coming here

or what's going on
between us, then we need to

sit down and talk
about it, figure it out.

I'm not going to Vienna.

I thought about going

for a little bit.

But I'm gonna stay.

I kind of panicked when I heard.

Yeah. I can imagine.

I thought you were leaving.

My flight's at 6:00.

Oh.

Dad and I both wish this
didn't have to be so hard.

But you know we both love you.

Yeah, I know.

I love you, too.

Hey.

Hey.

So, I can't go.

Yeah. I, uh, I figured.

What do you mean, you figured?

I don't know. I...
I had a feeling.

So you didn't buy the tickets?

Nah.

You're kidding?

I don't know. I...

I could tell your
heart wasn't in it.

I just...

I don't think it's the best
thing right now for me.

Yeah, I know.

So how about you?
Are you still gonna go?

Nah, I'm not gonna go.

Not without you.

Guess I gotta go see
stinky Dr. Pavone, huh?

I was thinking,
though, about our trip.

What?

I don't know. Maybe this summer.

That's a nice sh*t.

Thanks.

(FELICITY LAUGHING)

BEN: Nice.

Just try and get it...

Try and get it in the
little round thing, all right?
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