04x12 - Daddy's Little Beauty

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Flintstones". Aired: September 30, 1960 – April 1, 1966.*
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Living in Bedrock, Fred Flintstone works an unsatisfying job, but returns home to his wife Wilma and eventually daughter Pebbles.
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04x12 - Daddy's Little Beauty

Post by bunniefuu »

Maybe Barney would like to take
a walk with me and Pebbles.

1-5-2..

- Hiya, Fred.
- Now you made me lose my place.

Oh, sorry, Fred.

1-5-2

3-4-6-2-1.

Now, what is it you want?

[phone ringing]

Excuse me, Fred.
My phone's ringin'.

Hello.

(Fred on phone)
'Hello, Barney.
This is Fred.'

Ooh! Hiya, Fred.

Say, I'm taking Pebbles for
a walk. You wanna come along?

Hey, that sounds like fun.
The only thing is--

We're leaving right now.

- Oh okay, but I gotta--
- 'Barney, hurry up.'

Just one thing, Fred.
I got to be home by five.

We're eating early tonight.

Why didn't you say so?

I tried to, but
you hung up on me.

Oh boy. That guy
really is a kook.

[siren blaring]

Yabba-dabba-doo

Flintstones
Meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Let's ride with the
family down the street

Through the courtesy
of Fred's two feet

When you're
with the Flintstones

You'll have
a yabba dabba doo time

A dabba doo time

You'll have
a gay old time

[suckling]

burp

[babbling]

slurp slurp slurp

ha ha ha

bam

(Fred)
'Wilma, I'm home.'

Hello, little Pebbly-poo.

You bein' a good little girl?

Well, look at this.

Daddy's little angel
finished all her milk.

burp

Now, what was that for, Dino?

(Wilma)
'Oh dear.
Is that you, Fred.'

Yeah, honey.
What's wrong?

Oh, it's the vacuum cleaner.
It's stuffed up again.

Oh well. Let me
take a look.

Mmm! Sure is.

Roll it over to the window.
I'll have it fixed in a jiffy.

All it takes
is little know-how.

Quarter to three.
Let's make it 3 o'clock.

toing

cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo

Ow!

Sorry, pal.
Just borrowin' a feather.

'This should do it.'

Coochie, coochie, coochie,
coochie, coochie, coochie.

Ah-ah-ah-ah

ah-ah-achoo!

Give it a try now, Wilma.

[whirring]

Oh, that's fine.

Thanks, Fred.

And nobody even said gesundheit.

Boy, I'm exhausted.

I did the washing, ironing,
scrubbed the kitchen floor

polished the silver,
dusted the living room--

Oh, Wilma. Why don't you
take a break?

You can clean out
the garage tomorrow.

Oh, you're so good to me.

heh heh heh

No, I mean it Wilma.
I got an idea.

Why don't you take a nap

I'll take the baby out
for a little air.

Ah, you are good to me, Fred.

I think I will take
a breather.

Come on, pinky. Mush.

How 'bout it?
Wanna take a walk?

[Dino barking]

No, no. No, Dino. Not you.

(Fred)
'I was talking
to the baby.'

Down, Dino. Down, down!

Heel, Dino

No, no, Dino. No.
Heel, heel!

Dino, I said he..

wham

toing

Man's best friend.

Oh, boy.

[pleasant music]

What a day. Smell that
clean, fresh air, Barney.

[barney sniffing]

Ah, Fred. You smell the air.
I'll smell the hot dogs.

Huh? Oh, oh, yeah.

Red hots. Get 'em
while they're hot.

Red hots.

Hmm, How about it, Barney?
Be my guest?

Well, now that
you mention it.

(Barney)
'Thank you.'

Uh, two hot dogosauruses.

Yes, sir.

Hold the baby.

Pay the man.
Will you, Barney?

Who, me?
Well, uh..

...I suppose a guest has
certain obligations to his host.

Eh, would you hold the baby?

Sure thing.

Heh heh heh. You're a real doll.

[Pebbles giggling]

Here you are.

See you later.

Hey, pretty good
hot dogosauruses, huh, Fred?

Yeah, but something's missing.

Hey, Mac. Aren't you
forgettin' something?

Huh? Oh, you're right.

Hey, Barn.
We forgot the mustard.

Ga-ga-ga ga-ga

boo-boo

Boo-boo. Yeah, ha ha.

I agree with you 100%.

Hey, Fred. We better start back.
It's gettin' late.

Yeah, I guess
you're right.

My, what a beautiful subject.

- Huh?
- Uh, you mean me?

You're kiddin', of course.

I mean the little girl.

Like the sign says "Children's
photos our specialty."

Yeah! Yeah, I think I will.

Bu-but, Fred. You just had
a picture taken last week.

Sure, but you know
how kids change.

Oh yeah. She may have
two more freckles by now.

ha ha ha

Alright, cutie.
Let's have a big smile.

Yeah, Pebbles.
Smile for the nice man.

(Fred)
'Big bitty smile.'

'Come on.
Look at daddy, Pebbles.'

Now watch.

ga ga ga

ah ah ah

moo moo moo

eeyah eeyah eeyah

Please, please.
I cave.

Please, I don't feel
so good.

[clucking]

Please, sir, please.
Control yourself.

Wha-wha-wha..

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah.
Did it work?

Did she smile?

[yawning]

(photographer)
'I'm afraid not.'

Okay, I got
some more that will--

Please!

I'd rather do it myself.

Well, gosh. I was
only trying to help.

This is what you want,
to have a picture

taken on a pony.

It never fails.

Come on. Daddy will put
Pebbles on the nice pony.

[Pebbles wailing]

Okay, okay, okay.
Daddy will show you.

See, see, sweetheart.

See. Nothing to be afraid of.

Ee-ya-hoo!

[neighing]

Ho ho!

Hey-hey, this is fun.

Ya-hoo!

Hiho..

...silver!

[neighing]

Look at daddy, Pebbles.

crash

Ha, ha ha ha

ha ha ha

I say, that's it, that's it.

Ooh hoo hoo. This will be
my masterpiece.

I'll make it a flash sh*t.

Hold it.

boom

Hunh. And I thought this was
a nice, safe profession.

Are you alright, Fred?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Did you get her picture.

We'll know
in an instant.

You see, I use
an instant Polorock camera.

[gasps]
Magnificent, beautiful.

This is the cutest baby
picture I've ever taken.

Say, that's great.

- Yeah, isn't it?
- Boy, she's a doll.

Yeah, heh heh.

For a smile like that

it's worth a bump
on the head any day.

ha ha ha

Fred, if I'm gonna make it
home in time for dinner.

We better take a bus.

Okay, here comes
the bus now.

[tires screeching]

Watch your step please.

How much to Rockway Lane?

Ten cents and a nickel
for the kid.

Fair enough.

gulp

ding ding ding

The nickels and dimes
aren't so much

but, ooh, those half dollars.

gulp

ding ding ding

Step to the back
of the bus please.

ting ting

Oh brother.

This guy would be great
at a taffy pull.

And you know what, Stanley?

The winner of the beauty contest
gets a prize of 500 grams.

Wow, that's real dough.

You said it.

I sure hope my baby wins
that beauty contest.

Beauty contest for babies?

He-hey, Fred.

You hear anything about
a beauty contest for babies?

No.

This guy next to me
is talking about one.

And the prize is 500 bucks.

Boy, that's a lot of hay.

He's got his baby entered

and I bet his baby isn't
half as pretty as Pebbles.

E-excuse me, mister.

How you go about gettin'
into this contest?

You gotta fill out
an entry blank, see?

Wait a minute. I think
I got an extra one.

Yeah, here it is.

Gee, thanks.

Come on, Charlie.
This is our stop.

[screeching]

(bus driver)
'Watch your step please.
Watch your step.'

ting ting

My baby was supposed
to meet me here.

(female #1)
'Over here, darling.'

Oh, hiya, honey.

You're all set, I got
the entry blank for the contest.

Can my daughter and I
give you a lift home?

No, thanks. Good luck
in the contest, miss.

See you later, Fred.

Oh, here is
your entry blank for Pebbles.

Thanks, Barn.
But don't go home yet.

I want you to hear
what Wilma says

when I tell I put Pebbles
in a beauty contest.

Fred Flintstone,
are you out of your skull?

But, Wilma.

No siree bob.
No daughter of mine

is entering a beauty contest.

But, Wilma.
Pebbles can win it.

That's exactly
what I don't want.

Do you realize what happens to
babies who win beauty contests?

And get lots of money
and go in the movies?

But, Wilma--

The become vain,
spoiled, impossible.

No, Fred.

I want our Pebbles
to grow up

a normal, happy,
unspoiled girl.

But, but..

...Wilma.

Barney, say something, will ya?

But, but, Wilma..

Oh, boy.
Thanks a lot, Barney.

Now look, Wilma. Let's sit down
and talk this over.

Not now.

I've got to get this roast
ready for dinner.

Besides, the answer
would still be no.

slam

tick tick tick

- Hiya, Fred.
- Huh?

Oh! Oh, it's you, Barney.

- What you doin'?
- Shh.

Not so loud.

Come in but be quiet.

Oh boy. For a minute,
I thought it was Wilma.

I'm filling out
the entry blank

so Pebbles can get
in that beauty contest.

But Fred, I thought Wilma
was dead set against it.

Barney, don't you
know by now.

That I'm the boss
in this house.

But boss. What's gonna happen
when Wilma finds out?

Let me worry about that.

Right now, I got to finish
this entry blank.

Eh, color of entrant's hair.

Brown.

Color of entrant's eyes.

heh heh heh

Same as mine.

Bloodshot.

ha ha ha

Barney, you heard of people
with chiseled features.

How would you like
to have a chiseled head?

Subtle, but I get it.

Good, now where was I?

Eh, measurements of entrant.

What would you say, Barney?

Well, just as a guess.

I'd say about, uh..

...14, 12, 14.

Yeah, yeah.
That's about right.

14, 12, 14.

Well, look at that
next line, Fred.

heh heh heh

All entrants must appear
in bathing suit

and evening gowns.

Evening gown! Whoever heard
of an evening gown for a baby?

Hey, how about this
lampshade, Fred?

It's just about
the right size.

ha ha ha

(Fred)
'Oh, Barney.
That's wonderful.'

'Oh, what a doll.'

ga ga ga

Well, that takes care
of the evening gown.

Now we gotta get her
a bathing suit.

Hey, how about this doily?

Here, Barn.
Try this on for size.

Oh, Fred. I don't look
good in a bikini.

heh heh heh

On Pebbles, fat head.

ha ha ha

[knocking on door]

(Wilma)
'Fred, are you in there?'

'Fred?'

Uh, yeah, yeah, Wilma.

Barney and me, we-we
have things to discuss.

We-we'll be out
in a little bit.

Can you hear anything, Betty?

I can hear them whispering

but I can't make out
what they're saying.

They're up to
something, alright.

In fact, Fred's been acting
mysteriously all week.

Pretty neat, huh?

But I've been thinking, Fred.

What if she has to go into
water? This bikini might shrink.

I'm way ahead
of you, Barney boy.

We'll test the bikini and give
her a bath at the same time.

Good thinking, Fred.

[Pebbles babbling]

Yeah, ha ha ha

Yes, Henry. I got
you bubble bath, see.

Pebbles get all
clean for tonight.

Hey, Henry. Make
lots of bubbles.

ha ha ha

[bubbling]

Hey, that looks like fun.

I think I'll get on my
bikini and take one too.

ha ha ha

plop plop

Whee!

[splash]

(Fred)
'Okay, Pebbles.
That's enough.'

Come to think of it, Wilma.

Barney's been acting
strange too.

He says they're
going out tonight.

You don't suppose they..

they..

(both)
...found another woman.

Oh, Wilma. Let's not
lose our heads.

After all, Fred is fat
and homely and sloppy.

Yeah, and Barney is short
and dumpy and not too bright.

(both)
They have found another woman.

Uncle Barney will get
Pebbles nice and dry.

Now I gotta figure a way to get
out of the house with the baby.

Without Wilma
knowin', of course.

Hey, maybe you can sneak her
out in your bowling bag.

Say, that might work.

Sure, you tell Wilma
we're going bowling, see?

And then you put Pebbles
in the bowling bag.

Yeah, yeah go on.

And, uh, you put
the bowling ball

in Pebbles' crib,
and then we--

Ah, be quiet, Barney.
Why do I have to sneak her out?

(Fred)
'She's half mine.'

Yeah, I know, Fred, but..

I'm through
pussyfootin' around.

I'm goin' in there,
and I'm gonna tell Wilma

I'm goin' out,
and I'm taking the baby.

That's tellin' her, Fred.

Oh, she'll give me
an argument alright.

She'll say, "Oh no, you're not."

And I'll say, "Oh yes, I am."

And she'll say,
"Oh no, you're not."

And I'll say,
"Oh yes, I am."

And she'll say, "Oh no--"

Hold it, hold it, Fred.

Why don't you quit now while
you're ahead. Heh heh heh.

I knew Fred is
going out tonight

but he won't tell me where.

And Barney's going
with him.

I've got an idea.


You and I are gonna be
busy this evening too.

So if Fred wants
to go out tonight

he's going to have to take
Pebbles with him.

[giggling]

I get it, Wilma.

You can't get into trouble
with a baby in your arms.

(Wilma)
'Exactly.'

I don't know
what he's up to.

but he's not going out of this
house without the baby.

Come on, Barney.

See you later, Betty.

Bye, Barney.

Yeah, Wilma.
I'm goin' out too.

Okay, Fred,
but you're taking the baby.

Huh!

Oh no, I'm not.

- Oh yes, you are.
- Oh no, I'm not.

- Oh yes, you are.
- Oh no, I'm not.

- Oh yes you are.
- Oh no--

You win, you win,
Wilma. We are.

Little do you know it, Pebbles.

Tonight, you're gonna be daddy's
little beauty contest winner.

[Pebbles babbling]

You know, Barn.
If I live to be a hundred

I'll never understand women.

No matter what you
expect them to do

they always do the opposite.

Yeah, guess that's why they call
'em the opposite sex, he he he.

- Oh look, Fred, here we are.
- Yeah.

[car horns honking]

Boy, what a mob.

We'll have to use
the stage entrance.

Wowie, wow, wow, wow.

Ah, they must be
the mothers of the kids.

If they're the mothers, I wonder
what the kids look like.

You said it before.
Wowie, wow, wow, wow.

Just a minute. What can I do
for you gentlemen?

And the little lady?
Coochie-coochie-coochie-coo.

[Pebbles laughing]

Would you kindly direct us

to Miss Pebbles Flintstones'
dressing room?

Oh, let's see,
Pebbles Flintstone..

Room 13, but she isn't here yet.

Coochie-coochie-coochie-coo

Oh yes, she is.
You were just tickling her.

Wha.. A baby!

Oh boy. What's Mr. Goldbrick
gonna say about this?

A baby in the contest.

Mr. Flintstone,
are you out of your mind?

But Mr. Goldbrick.

No, no, no! No baby
is entering any contest of mine.

But Mr. Goldbrick..

Hey, hey. Just a minute.

I got an entry blank here.

Show me where it says anything
about the contestant's age.

(male on PA)
'Mr. Goldbrick,
the contest is starting.'

(Mr. Goldbrick)
'Okay, I'm coming. I'm coming.

Yeah. Show us
where it says anything

about the contestant's age.

(Mr. Goldbrick)
Are you sure there isn't
something about it?

I even read the fine print,
heh heh heh.

[crowd clapping]

muah muah muah

She's not goin'
to be in my show.

Look. I'll tell you
what I'll do.

Bring her back in 20 years,
and I'll put her in.

Mr. Goldbrick, Mr. Goldbrick.
What an idea!

Puttin' a baby
in the contest.

I didn't put--

Now, wait a minute.
How about my ba-ba-ba-baby!

In the contest.

Pebbles.

Didn't I tell you
she was great, Mr. Goldbrick.

You're a genius for thinking
of this, Mr. Goldbrick.

Yes, aren't I.

Quickly, I want pictures taken,
of me and the baby

for my image.
Goldbrick does it again!

Would you like some coffee while
we watch television, Betty.

The coffee sounds
wonderful, Wilma.

But, well, what do you say
we don't watch TV tonight.

I mean, can't we spend
a quiet evening just talking.

That's a wonderful idea.

I read somewhere
that people today

are losing the art
of conversation.

Okay, what do we talk about?

Oh, lots of things.

Uh, let's see.

Have you been
to any good sales lately?

Nope.

Seen any good place lately?

Nope.

Read any good books?

Nope.

- Wilma.
- Yeah.

I'll race you
to the TV set.

[both giggling]

From the stage
of Bedrock Theater.

We've just brought you
the first half

of our International
Beauty Contest.

(Mr. Goldbrick)
'We've seen a young lady
reach her first plateau'

'on her way
to fame and stardom.'

'Miss Pebbles Flintsone.'

(both)
Pebbles Flintstone!

In a beauty contest?

So that's what they're up to.

Come on, Betty. Let's get down
to that beauty contest.

I'm with you.

[Dino barking]

And now, while the girls

are changing
into their bathing suits.

Here's a word from our sponsor.

Oh, that Fred,
going behind my back this way.

I'll bet Barney's
in on it too.

Just wait till I get my hands
on that Fred.

[Dino growling]

You're right dino,
rawr rawr.

As you know,
ladies and gentlemen

in this contest, talent goes
hand in hand with beauty.

And leading off

anxious to show that she's not
just another pretty face.

Is the lovely
Miss Zelda Pilbrick.

I got Pebbles
all ready, Barney.

Shh

Miss Zelda Pilbrick is on.

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah.
What's she doin'?

She is entertaining
the folks with her talent.

Ridin' a unicycle
and knittin' a sweater.

Heh heh heh

squeak squeak squeak

Boy, she's really loaded
with talent.

- Uh, Fred?
- Yeah, rawr.

Speakin' of talent.

What do you got planned
for our Pebbles.

- What're you talkin' about?
- Talent.

Every contestant
will be judged

for her talent
as well as her beauty.

Oh boy. What am I
gonna do, Barney?

Pebbles is just beautiful.
She hasn't any talent.

- Betty, can't you go faster?
- I'll try.

- Oh, dear.
- What is it?

We're getting a flat.

And I know
there's no spare tire.

Oh my gosh. Dino,
quick. Do something.

What can he do, Wilma?

I don't know, but..

Good boy, Dino.

Faster, faster.

Barney, think of something.
What'll I do?

Gee, I don't know, Fred.

It's hard to top
that last act.

[Dino barking]

Find Fred, Dino.

[Dino continues barking]

(Betty)
'And Barney too.'

And now, last but not least.

That little lady
who has captured your hearts.

Miss Pebbles Flintstone.

Can't you think
of anything for her to do?

I'm lost, Fred.

[Dino barking]

Dino, how did you--

pow

[Dino continues barking]

- Barney Rubble.
- Fred Flintstone.

Where is my baby?

Oh gosh, Wilma,
Dino knocked me down.

You're lucky he got
to you first.

Now, where is Pebbles?

screech

muah muah muah

Fred, I'm ashamed of you.

You know how I feel
about this sort of thing?

I, uh--

Hey, they're gonna announce
the winner now.

(Mr. Goldbrick)
'And here she is.'

'The winner of The International
Beauty Contest.'

Miss, Miss Zelda Pilbrick.

- She didn't win.
- Oh, cheer up, Fred.

Like Goldbrick said

in 20 years, you can
enter Pebbles again.

Ladies and Gentlemen.
Tonight, we have two winners.

Allow me to present,
Miss Beauty of the future.

The one and only
Miss Pebbles Flintstone.

There, she's finally asleep.

Yeah, sleeping like a baby.

You see, Wilma, you were
worryin' all for nothin'.

Winnin' the beauty contest

hasn't had any effect
on her at all.

Yes, I guess you're right, Fred.

Sure I'm right.

By tomorrow, she'll have
forgotten all about it.

[Pebbles babbling]

Flintstones
Meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone-age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Some day maybe Fred
will win the fight

And that cat will stay out
for the night

When you're
with the Flintstones

Have a yabba-dabba-doo time

A dabba-doo time

You'll have a gay old time

bam

thud

You'll have a gay old time

W-i-ilma-a-a!

bang bang bang
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