04x08 - Dancing with Angels

[bunniefuu]

Welcome to Paris, mademoiselle.

Would you like some bubbly
water with a wedge of lemon?

Oh, Justin, it's all so beautiful.

The music, the food.

Whatever that last thing you just said was.

Well, the fake French accent

goes with the fake French scenery.

I got it from a travel agency
that went out of business.

It was either this or a volcano in Hawaii,

and volcano food is always burnt.

So, you recycled?
That's good.

Yeah, well, it's true.

When you hang around angels,

you're influenced to do good things.

And sometimes we do it
by sending mind messages.

I like you.

I heard it!

Oh my gosh, it was all echoey in my head.

Like, "I like you, you, you."

Aww. I like you too...
too, too, too.

This is the best date ever.
Put some...

Get out here, Max!

I told you I don't want
all that sand in the house!

Mom! I'm trying to have
a romantic dinner.

Oh! You made it
look like Paris!

And you must be Rosie.

Jerry! Get out here.
Look what Justin did for his girlfriend.

Why are you wearing all that stuff?

I am not making two trips!

You people think I'm the family pack mule!

Oh, hi.

Could this date get any worse?

Can you hear me, Harper?

Yes. No, I'm on
the terrace now.

Forget the phone,
I can hear better when you yell!

Ah! That's hot.
What was that?

Ow! That's hot.
What was that?

Sorry. Hey, my dad
brought everything up.

So stop faking the cramp
and just come on up.

You guys are ruining everything!

Cool! We're in Paris!
Oh, no.

Buenos Dias.

Wait a minute.

I know what's going on here.

We're being rude.
Yes!

Justin made us dinner
to introduce us to Rosie.

Come on everybody, let's eat.

How sweet!

Mmmm.
Smile.

♪ Everything... ♪

♪ is not... ♪

♪ What it seems ♪

♪ Seems ♪

♪ Well, you know everything's gonna be a breeze ♪

♪ And the end will no doubt justify the means ♪

♪ You can fix any problem with the slightest of ease ♪

♪ Yes, please ♪

♪ But you might find out it'll go to your head ♪

♪ When you write a report on a book you never read ♪

♪ With the snap of your fingers you can make your bed ♪

♪ That's what I said ♪

♪ Everything is not what it seems ♪

♪ When you can get all you wanted in your wildest dreams ♪

♪ You might run into trouble if you go to extremes ♪

♪ Because everything is not what it seems ♪

♪ Be careful not to mess with the balance of things ♪

♪ Because everything is not ♪

♪ What it seems ♪

Yeah. That's my family.

You can always count
on them to embarrass me.

Only thing missing was my dad

sucking hot cheese through a snorkel.

He did do that.

What?

Listen, Justin,

why don't we just have a
do-over date tomorrow night?

We can forget tonight ever happened.

Alright.

Hey.

You know where you guys should go?

I've heard of this crazy, fun
angel club in Los Angeles.

I'm not an angel.
Do you think they'd let me in?

More importantly...
would they let me in?

Well, it is angels only.

I don't think it's a good idea.

Yeah, Alex, it's not gonna happen.

You always got some
kinda scam going on up there.

Yeah, you're right.
I am bad.

Maybe... maybe being
around all those angels

would be a good influence on me.

So, if you take me,
you'll be doing a good thing.

And if you don't take me,

well, you'll be doing
the opposite of a good thing.

You're manipulating an angel.
What kind of a person does that?

The kind who wants to take
her best friend to an angel club

for the best night of her life.

I get to go too?

Now Rosie, you don't wanna
do the wrong thing here.

It's true.

I never do the wrong thing.

Oh! Then it's settled.

You're doing good by taking us to the club.

Uh-uh. Not good.
Nothing's settled.

I'm not gonna let you
ruin something that we...

I can't wait to dance with you
at the angel club.

Another mind message.
I love those.

We're going to the club.

What just happened?

I may pay for this later,

but I think I just manipulated an angel.

OK. I'll see you guys tomorrow.

Yes.

This is gonna be awesome!

I finally have an excuse
to make angel wings.

Wow. This is the first time
one of your outfits is actually

gonna help you blend in.
Kinda weird, right?

Alex, I don't want you to
ruin my date with Rosie.

I don't know if you know this,

but she's a little outta my league.

Well, if you wanna date someone
who's in your league,

you should date Glenda,
from the hardware store.

You know, the girl whose head
is shaped like a raindrop.

Alex, I'm serious, alright?
I like Rosie.

After Juliet, I thought I
might not ever meet someone

that I felt this way about.

OK, Jimmy Soap Opera, I get it.

Alright, you won't even see me there.

But, if it doesn't work out with Rosie,

I've been telling Glenda
about you for months now,

and I think...
she's interested.

So, Alex.

Oh my gosh, Max.
You scared me.

Actually, Mom and Dad are gonna
be the ones who are scared.

When they find out that you're going
to Los Angeles without telling them.

And how would they find out?

I don't know.

Sometimes they hear things from someone

who could easily be quiet if he
had a souvenir from Los Angeles.

Alright, what kind of souvenir
does this someone want?

This someone wants you to bring him back.

Ozzy Osbourne's star,
from the Hollywood Walk-of-Fame.

Fine.

Oh, you know the someone we're
talking about is me, right?

Oh my gosh! No way!

Wow. Flashing in
is so awesome.

So much faster than flying.

And you don't have to worry
about those lazy birds

trying to hitch a ride on you.

Plus, Harper's homemade wings

would have never made the flight.

They're uh... kinda floppy.

Yeah, you don't wanna bend
a wing. You'll fly in a circle.

Wow. The Hollywood sign.

In person. This is amazing.

It's like a dream.

You dreamt of standing
in front of giant letters?

Well, the dream part
was... you.

Well, it's not a dream.

I love Los Angeles.

Nobody even noticed two
teenage girls wearing wings

ripping a star out of
the Hollywood Walk-of-Fame.

Yeah, they were all just
looking for celebrities.

What a bunch of losers.

I just bought a map that
showed me where they all live.

Wait. Alex, isn't it
gonna be awkward dancing

with a big piece of sidewalk
in your hands all night?

Yeah, you're right.
Here, hold this.

Key Largo, Key West, keychain.

Hey, what took you guys so long?

Oh, we, uh... we stopped
to get Max a souvenir.

OK, you guys ready to go in?

Gosh. In where? Is the club
behind the Hollywood sign?

No, the secret entrance is here.

Inside the "H".

OK guys, follow me.

Oh! This is so exciting.

Let's go in and pretend like we're angels.

OK.
That'll be tough for Alex.

Hey! At least
my wing's not bent.

OK guys, we just have to talk to
the manager and then we're in.

What? They'll know
we're not angels.

Stop! I haven't seen you guys
here before.

So, let me tell you about
all the fun you're gonna have.

It's OK. I've actually
been here before

so I can kind of show them around.

Great! Great.

I'm Zeedrik, if you have any
questions, just let me know.

Wait.
Where are you guys from?

Angel-opolis... ville.

I don't think so.

Tonight, you live on the dance floor.

Hold on a second.

Let me see those wings.

Those aren't angel of darkness
wings, are they?

No?

Angels don't lie.
That's good enough for me.

We made it in.

What are angels of darkness?

Oh, they're bad angels.

If you get too close
to one, they can draw you

to the dark side and
make you do bad things.

We have one of those in the wizard world.

It's called Alex.

Alright. Ready to have
some fun, Harper?

Yeah. This place is pretty
high up on the list of things

I'd love to be able to tell someone
about, but can't. Come on!

Max, where are Alex, Justin and Harper?

They didn't show up for work.

I'm covering for their shifts.

Right now, I'm covering for Alex.

See? I'm reading a magazine.

Uh, where did they go?

They all took a trip to...

I don't know.
They're your kids.

Trip?

Max.

Max, you tell us where they went

or I'll send you to your room.

Sweet. I love my room.

Then you can never go there again.

I never liked my room anyway.

Jerry, how are we supposed
to punish this thing?

Sorry, but I'm not talking.

I've got a lot riding on this.

Wait, Max.
Did you see this?

Look, it's the annual Little
Miss Waverly Place Pageant.

Tonight. And look, Jerry,
it's not too late

to enter your seven
to twelve year-old girl.

Yeah, but I'm a guy.

Oh, you wouldn't.

Have you met us?
Oh, yes we would.

It's your choice. You can
answer some questions now,

like, "Where are Alex,
Justin and Harper?",

or you can answer some questions later,

like, "What will you be doing

for the talent portion
of the competition?"

Lean and step.
Lean and step.

Check out the club.
Check out the club.

I'm really getting the hang
of this angel slide thing.

Yeah. It's not that hard when
they're saying exactly what to do.

Stop talking, so I can hear
what I'm supposed to do.

Lean to the right.

Go down.

Now slide, angel slide.

Slide, angel slide.
Come on!

Slide, angel slide.
Come on!

Slide, angel slide.
Yeah!

Slide, angel slide.
Come on!

Slide, angel slide.

Yeah!
Smile.

Ah, I blocked your face again.

These stupid wings are
making it really hard for me

to prove this is the best date ever.

I'll prove it.
Oh.

Slide, angel slide.
Come on!

Oh my gosh.

What?

Is it my breath?

I've been on a no-stinky-food
diet since Thursday,

just in case I got the chance to kiss you.

So, it's not my breath.

Alex and Harper are doing the angel slide.

We have to stop them.

Why?

Wings up.
Wings down.

Wings up.
Wings down.

Now all the angels fly up!

No!

Oh, that's why.

I said, "fly up",

and two angels didn't "fly up."

You know I would, but I just
sprained a wing jogging.

So, it's like...
not working for me.

And I don't know what her excuse is.

You're not angels.
Who are you?

Rosie, let's get out of here,

before our date's totally ruined.

Whoa! You two stick around.

No one's going anywhere.

I knew I shouldn't have
let you come here, Alex.

Relax, I can get us out of this.

Come on, Zeedrik.
Let us out of this.

You're right. I should let you
out of this, but I won't.

I don't think you're angels.

We should run, but I don't know where.

And he's right there,
so he probably heard me.

Never mind.

Come on, Zeedrik.
We're angels, we've got wings.

Don't look at them too closely.

Then prove it. By flying.

Nobody passes up that part
of the angel slide.

It's literally the only fun part.

I'm just gonna
do the right thing

and tell him you're not angels.

I brought you here.
I'll take the blame.

No, I'm not letting you
take the blame for them.

Alex, distract him.
I'll handle this.

Say, Zeedrik, I love this club.

I'm digging the white.

Tell me, tell me, what is your secret

for handling grape juice stains?

Zeedrik. This one can fly.

No, I can't.

Uh-oh.

See? We're angels.

Ta-da!

There's more to being an angel
than just flying.

I've got another test.

All angels can play the harp and sing.

Well, here, you're Harper.

I don't care what you make me look like,

I know that you guys are just bluffing.

And I'm not gonna tell you
where Alex and Justin went.

Oh, really? How 'bout now?

What have you done to me?

Because I love it.

Ya can't cr*ck me.

OK. I didn't think it
would come to this, but...

look what Mommy bought you.

Get along, little doggy.

Quit stalling, suspicious angels.

I want to see you play.

OK, I'll go first.

Pling ping-ping ping ping-ping.

I'll play, you sing.
OK.

♪ Twinkle twinkle
little angels ♪

♪ Angels
♪ If you wonder

♪ We are angels ♪

Harp solo!

OK. Ta-da!

Alright. You're angels.

Horribly awkward, untalented
flabby wing, tone deaf...

OK, OK. So he said it,
we're angels.

Alright, let's get back to the slide.

Crank up the slide.
Crank up the...

Oh, no.

What's that? A star from
the Hollywood Walk-of-Fame?

Well, how did that get in here?

That belongs to Ozzy Osbourne,
not us. Right, angels?

Yeah, right.
Right!

You took that!
If you're angels...

You're angels of darkness.

Pull the alarm!
Everybody, get out!

Rosie!

Rosie!

She's gone.
Nice going, Alex.

This is exactly why I
didn't want you to come.

I knew you'd ruin it.

Justin, I'm sorry. I didn't mean
for all this to happen.

You never mean for things to happen.

You just don't get it.

This was my second chance
at love, and now she's gone.

Way to go, Harper.

Way to make a mess of things.

Me?
I know.

I just wanted to say it for once
instead of hearing it, OK?

Alright, let's get this thing
back to Hollywood.

Being around all these angels is starting

to make me feel like I
should do the right thing.

I really hope that wears off.

That was wonderful.

Oh Max, honey, I have to tell you,

you are the cutest little
cowgirl I've ever seen.

You did a really good job on him.

I think he's got a real chance
at winning this pageant.

Come on. I mean, you're
not really gonna do this

to your own son, are you?

Next up is Waverly Place's
own Maxine Russo.

Oh!
Oh, that's you, cutie.

Get up there and knock 'em dead.

Woo.
Go up.

OK, I'll tell you!

Alex and Harper and Justin all
went to Los Angeles with Rosie

to some angel club.

Oh. Well, Rosie's an angel,
so, they're OK.

OK.

Now, get up there and win this for Mommy!

But I told you where they went.

Yes. Yes, yes you did.

Um, but we don't care about that right now.

What's important is you
winning this competition.

Go get our trophy!

Come on, now!

Uh, what the heck?

Smile.

The hat! The hat!

Yeah!
Woo! Woo-hoo!

Justin?

Rosie. Uh...

You're still here.

I... I thought
that you took off.

You thought I would take off without you?

No. I just lost you
in all that chaos.

Look, I don't even know where
to begin to apologize.

This was supposed to be
our do-over date.

It was even worse than the last one.

Justin, it's not about any one date.

We're gonna have lots of dates.

We are?

I don't know if it's
the fear of losing you,

or the fact that a coyote could come out

of the woods and eat us right now,

but I'm just gonna...
just gonna lay it on out there.

You mean a lot to me.

And you mean a lot to me.
Why are you trying so hard?

I was in love once.
And I lost her.

And... now I've been given
this second chance.

And who gets second chances?

I just don't wanna mess it up.

Justin, nothing is going to mess this up.

Are you just saying that because you're
an angel and you're obligated to?

Don't ruin the moment, Justin.

Do you think Max will be upset if
we don't have Ozzie Osbourne's star?

Um...

No. No no no. I think he has
much bigger problems.

Mom and dad entered me in a Beauty Pageant.

Oh Christ, that's awful.
And hilarious.

But those are my favorite combinations,
so I like it.

It gets worse.

We won.

We won.

There she is. Little Ms. Waverly Place.

You got weeks to learn how to lasso,

cause we're going to regionals.