04x12 - Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost

[bunniefuu]

("SHAKE MY HAND"
BY MERRELL AND THE EXILES PLAYING)

(MAN WHOOPS)

♪ ♪

- You ready for something to eat?
- (WRITING RAPIDLY)

Can't you see my brain is on fire?

I'm inspired. Drawing connections
to all these things

your minuscule mind
couldn't possibly fathom.

Though, to be fair,
the inspiration I stole from that muse

has been waning
with every thought and passing minute.

It's nearly gone.

And you will be, too,
if you don't order food.

You know, I could go for a bite.

Bite me.

Sorry, do you mind giving me
and my friend a moment?

She's just a little...

We have a nasty habit of running
into each other like this, witch.

How did you find me?

The artifact I stuffed you in
was covered in your red hair after,

so... that wasn't hard.

But calling me a witch is reductive.

A lot's changed
since we last saw each other.

Wow.

A Heretic then. How lovely.

Though unless you intend
to k*ll me with kindness...

And we both know
how much I suck at m*rder.

Distraction, on the other hand...

- Suurentaa.
- (CRACKING)

k*lling you is my job.

- (COIN CLINKS)
- (BUTTONS CLICKING)

(JUKEBOX CLACKING)

("HIPCATS" BY ATFC
AND DAVID PENN PLAYING)

♪ All the soul brothers ♪

♪ Jitterbugs and hip cats
and fancy hats ♪

♪ And pretty girls with pretty smiles ♪

♪ All decked out in the latest styles ♪

♪ Breathtakin', hip-shakin' cuties now ♪

♪ Talkin' 'bout some fascinatin' ♪

♪ Devastatin' beauties now ♪

♪ Talkin' 'bout some fascinatin' ♪

- ♪ Devastatin' beauties now ♪
- Hey!

♪ ♪

(CHEERING)

(CACKLES)

♪ ♪

NECROMANCER: A toast!

To the three of us lost souls
getting the hell out of this hell.

Ah... I'll drink to that!
Ha-ha! (LAUGHING)

Better toast... to Falcon's Landing.

What is Falcon's Landing?

A Dungeons & Dragons campaign I played.

(GROANS SOFTLY)

It taught me a valuable lesson.

Jinns, or... jinnis, depending
on the mythology... suck. (SIGHS)

Look, I know it's hard to believe,
but our plan actually worked.

And the sphinx's riddle
led us to somebody who has

the power to give us what we want.

So that jinni can suck all he wants,
but he's our ticket home.

To the jinn!

(LAUGHING)

Or the jinni. (CHUCKLES)

For future reference... my name is Zied.

I'm sorry for the wait...
but your order's ready.

If you three gentlemen
would just sign here.

_

But this says we get one wish each.

Oh, because granting three wishes
is a bit of a myth.

The number is entirely
up to the discretion of the jinni.

But three wishes between the lot of you
should be plenty.

If you use them right...

LANDON: Which you don't want us to do.

The jinni at Falcon's Landing
was a total con man.

The entire party got wiped.

Check the bill.
I bet these wishes come at a cost.

NECROMANCER: We already told you, mate.
We're fresh out of coins.

And as I told you,
that won't be a problem.

No.

Because he wants our souls instead.

Three wishes for... three souls.

- LIZZIE: What's your deal?
- (CHAINS JANGLING)

I thought you wanted to k*ll her.

I will.

Once I figure out what her plan is.

I want to know why she's after the gods.

Who cares? If she's dead,
she can't find them.

But somebody else could. And...

like I keep telling people,
I'd like to be left alone.

AURORA:
Then why are you working with her?

Sorry. I've been eavesdropping.
But the question remains.

You heard what she wants to know.
What does the chicken scratch mean?

(SUCKS AIR THROUGH TEETH)

Oof.

I know it's very important.
I just can't seem to recall.

If she told us that easily,
you wouldn't believe her.

So we're gonna have to treat her
like a hostile witness.

HOPE: The court agrees.

How does the prosecution
wish to proceed?

If it pleases the court,

this could be an opportunity
to continue my Padawan vampire training.

Teach me how to head-dive her.

I mean, God knows
what's going on in there...

hamsters running around on wheels,
cobwebs, screws popping loose.

But I'd level up my powers
and you'd find out what she's up to.

Oh. Sounds fun. Shall we?

We shan't.

Then, what do you have in mind?

LANDON: Let's not overreact.

I told you that blasted feline
would screw us.

Never trust anyone
who licks their own arse.

Does it say why he wants our souls?

No. Only that the contract
is "perpetually binding"

once we all sign it.

Which we need not do,
because being trapped in Limbo forever

is the only thing we can accomplish
by ourselves.

I think we should take the deal.

ALARIC: I thought you said
Falcon's Landing taught you otherwise.

I mean, from what you told us,
everyone d*ed.

That was the party's fault.

The wishes we made had consequences
we hadn't anticipated.

Before we knew it,
we were at each other's throats.

Where we went wrong

was the thought we put
into the wording of our wishes.

If we had been simple, clear, concise,

we might have made it out
of the Landing alive.

The jinni used our greed
and carelessness against us.

Okay, so if we're careful,
this go-around...

Careful didn't get us here
and careful won't get us out.

Now, coins I can recoup.

But my very soul,
qu-questionable as that is...

No, I'm sorry,
even I'm not willing to risk that.

What if you didn't have to?

What if we saved your wish for last?

If Dr. Saltzman and I fail
on our first two tries,

you can use your wish
to get back to Peace.

(EXHALES)

Yeah, I'm okay with that.

Suits me fine, but I doubt
that blue bastard will go for it.

ZIED: You have a deal.

Three souls to Peace, then?

This must be a trap.

You're in league
with the sphinx, I say...

What Ted is saying is,

if souls can just
wish themselves back to Peace,

- why is this place so packed?
- Hmm.

(SIGHS) Because everyone screws it up.

None want to move on.
They all want to go back.

It's that which keeps them trapped here.
Not the coins.

Fear of the unknown, I guess.

When push comes to shove,
when Peace is at their very fingertips,

it's always, "I wish to be rich."
"I wish to be famous."

- "I wish to be Lady Gaga."
- Hmm.

Whoever she is.

LANDON:
That actually makes a lot of sense.

Bottom line is,
people wish for the world

and the worldly comforts they know.

That's the trap.

Good thing you gentlemen
are different, right?

Actually, we're not going to Peace.

Speak for yourself.

We made a deal about making this deal.
Remember?

What'll it be, then?

HOPE: You stand accused

of stealing my body,

blaspheming my family name, and...

well, for being a relentless bitch.

Guilty as charged.

But no matter what punishment
you think of, little bird,

I'm not telling you anything.

Mm-hmm.

We'll see.

Take that daylight ring off her finger.

- Hope.
- You heard me.

AURORA: My brother Tristan
looked at me like that

whenever he betrayed me.

(GASPS)

(SCREAMING)

_

"Not all those who wander are lost."

Wade.

NECROMANCER: It's Ted, actually.

"The Ted."

_

(CHUCKLES) I'll be damned.

At least, I was...

But your wish seems to have worked.

So where is Dr. Saltzman?

Well...

_

Are you gonna k*ll her or not?

Is that your way of telling me
that she's finally healed?

Yes, but she's still unconscious.

We've been at this for hours
and Aurora hasn't said anything.

So maybe it's time for another approach.

Way ahead of you.

Close that door.
You're letting in the stench.

Where did you get that grimoire?

I stole it from Vardemus.

- It's...
- Black magic.

I was gonna say "cool."

Aurora mentioned something to me
when we first met,

and I'm just trying to figure out
how to make one.

Another t*rture device.

Which means you're not listening to me.

(CHUCKLES) That's not how this works.

I'm the sire, you're the bond. Remember?

Obviously, if I'm helping you
burn someone alive.

But if I'm in this,

surely my opinion
should count for something, too.

A head dive won't work.

For starters, it's painless, and...

look, as much as I hate to admit it,
she's too strong for it.

Well, she seems pretty weak right now.
Maybe we could try?

Try all you want, okay?
That way, I can work in peace.

(SIGHS) Hope, a head dive
is the calculus of vampire powers.

I'm a total noob.
I don't know what I'm doing.

What you're doing is annoying me.
So, you have two choices.

You can either put
your brilliant plan into action

or you can sit here
and help me with mine.

NECROMANCER: Not a soul in sight.

It's quiet. Too quiet.

Perhaps that jinni
did deceive us after all.

Or you're being paranoid.

Uh, it might be Saturday, it's early.
Everyone might still be asleep.

Ah, listen to those birds.
I'd missed that sound.

Let's hope it's waking
your missing headmaster up.

Well, it shouldn't have to.

(BOTH SHOUT)

(GRUNTS)

Gentlemen.

Would you stop doing that?

My sincerest apologies, Fred.

It's Ted. The Ted.

Hmm.

I'm also sorry for intruding.

But once a wish commences,
I am tethered to it.

And I thought I should warn you
about something.

Like how you warned us you wouldn't be
bringing Dr. Saltzman back?

- Yeah.
- I am aware of this complication.

His soul remains at the bar,
and he's drinking quite heavily.

Mm, that's him, all right.

As our contract states,
I have granted your wish exactly.

"Bring the three of us back to life."

I have no idea why he lingers.

Well, I do. You're trying to get us
to burn through another wish.

This is exactly what happened
at Falcon's Landing.

We won't be fooled this time.

Take that, you smug blueberry.

About that warning.

If you're supposedly dead
and your friends see you,

only for you to eventually fail
and use your second wish,

this encounter could alter
their perception of reality.

Every mind is different,
but I've seen it drive people mad.

But you're the jinni expert,
so I'm sure you already knew that.

(INHALES SHARPLY) Oh.

(WHIMPERS)

Come on, Wudgie.
Let's go get some waffles.

Now you trust that jinni, do you?

Not at all.

But I can't risk driving people mad.

Then what, pray tell, are we to do?

(WADE SNORING)

LANDON (WHISPERS): Wade...

(REGULAR VOLUME): Wade...

(WADE GRUNTS)

- Wade.
- (GRUNTS)

I am the ghost of Landon Kirby.

My boy?

Is it really you?

Unfinished business has kept me
from passing beyond the spectral plane.

I need to find Dr. Saltzman.

(GROANS)

If you were a real ghost,
you'd know where Dr. Saltzman is.

Okay, I am the dead one.

Who are you to be telling me
how ghosts work?

Wait, is this a dream?

(SIGHS) Yes.

(EXHALES)

Busted, brotato.

I should have known.

I always dream about you
coming back to the school.

I need to find Dr. Saltzman.

That makes sense.

Since I'm not doing my therapy
appointments with Emma anymore,

this must be my subconscious
trying to make sense of all

the traumatic stuff
that we've been going through lately.

A-And that includes Dr. Saltzman.

Him dying had to be rough.

Okay, you're worse at being a dream
than you are at being a ghost.

Dr. Saltzman's not dead.

Wade.

Tell me everything.

(LAUGHS) Okay. So...

(EXHALES)

Well, Hope's become a bit of a problem.

I don't even know
where to start on Josie,

Lizzie, Kaleb and Cleo, or...

Oh, God.

I'm so sorry.

Not just about that.

What you're experiencing
is unnecessary and inhumane.

But I know how we can end this.

If you open your mind to me.

(GROANING SOFTLY)

I'll take that as a yes.

You always take such good care of me.

All evidence points to the contrary.

I know you think
my mind unwell, Tristan.

But I know how we can dispatch
our Tribrid tormentor.

Does that have anything to do
with the gods, by any chance?

See? You can be smart, big brother.

How did you know?

You know me.

Good old Tristan.

Always figuring stuff out.

So, what's the plan?

(MONITOR BEEPING STEADILY)

I can't believe
I let you talk me into this.

There is no way
we could have seen this coming.

Besides, even if we have
to burn through another wish,

- you'll still get yours. I promise.
- (LAUGHS SOFTLY)

Oh, were such promises made
at Falcon's Landing?

Yeah.

Thought so. Which is why we have
to make this bloody wish work.

His heart's not the problem.

Clear, or I will clear you.

(CLICKING)

You can't yell like that.

People can't know we're alive, remember?

I'd wager he does.

LANDON: Don't worry. I locked the door.

Okay, you can worry now.

(LANDON AND NECROMANCER SCREAM)

(CROWD CLAMORING)

LANDON: Knock it off.
It's not his fault.

What are you talking about?

What did you guys see?
And what are you doing back in Limbo?

Let's take a walk,
we'll tell you all about it.

No, I need five more minutes
with this guy.

He never sent me back.

Well, technically, he didn't have to,

because you're technically not dead.

(GRUNTS)

We wasted our first wish.

What game are you playing?

(EXHALES)

Let's get a drink, shall we?

It's time I told you everything.

ZIED: I spent centuries
granting wishes to humans.

Watching their selfish desires
lead them to ruin.

It was sad, really.

Then turned tragic when one of those
same humans m*rder*d me.

That's how I wound up here,

with a staggering debt
owed to the Ferryman.

I can relate, mate.

But that's what you get
for screwing people over.

LANDON: Like how you never told us

that going back
to the real world was pointless

if the Ferryman
can just drag us back here.

And don't forget about hiding the fact
that I'm in a coma.

I'm a jinni, not a psychic.

But I must confess I knew the Ferryman
wouldn't let you leave Limbo.

Has it never occurred to you three
that I might want something, too?

I wish for Peace.
As everyone trapped here should.

But as I said, my debt is far too large
to pay off by myself.

Which is why you opened this bar
and need our souls.

(GRUNTS)

What I need is a workforce.

Subcontractors.
Lost souls like yourselves

to help right the wrongs of Limbo
and help others reach Peace.

It's quite noble, really.

It's a pyramid scheme.

You're the bloody Jeff Bezos
of the afterlife.

(CHUCKLES)

I can't imagine how big
that bloke's bucket's gonna be.

(COINS CLATTER)

Ah. Nice haul today, King.

Drinks are on the house.

♪ Long after we're gone ♪

- ♪ These hills be rollin' on ♪
- (ALARIC LAUGHING)

♪ Long after we're gone... ♪

I guess that answers that mystery.

NECROMANCER: As well as another.

Do you seriously expect us
to be your coin flunkies?

I prefer "Peace facilitators."

And only if you fail.

So what is that next wish going to be?

♪ All those I love. ♪

LIZZIE: This has been a lot to take in.

But you really think
the gods can k*ll Hope?

(GRUNTS) Perhaps not all the gods,

but they have a singular father,
and he is immensely powerful,

if what Ben told me is true.

Ben?

The demigod I met
at the Salvatore School.

Honestly, Tristan,
are you not listening to me?

Please refresh my memory, dear sister.

Ben confirmed my suspicions
about the existence of the gods.

That I was right about the origins
of that sarcophagus

I stole from the museum.

It was crafted
by the very hands of a god,

along with several like it,
to protect them.

Wait, you're losing me again.

If the gods are so powerful,
what did they need protection from?

Well, that I don't know.

But the sarcophagus I recovered
was empty,

which means that a god walks this earth,

and surely knows where the others are.

And if we can find her,
we can find her father and the others.

Her?

Ben explained to me

that mythology has come to know her
as Vulcan or Hephaestus

or a hundred other names,
but always as a man,

when in reality
she is an impossibly gifted

engineer and blacksmith
who crafted weapons

and fantastic machines
for her family of gods.

And I bet she likes weed,
long walks on the beach,

- wearing beanies, and saying "dude."
- (LAUGHS)

Must you joke at a time like this?

I think some of your crazy
might be rubbing off on me.

But I'll give you this much,
that's one hell of a plan.

Well, it's the only plan.

The red oak capable of k*lling
the Tribrid has been destroyed.

So you must break my bonds
and get us out of here

before she returns.

Too late.

Tristan.

What is this treachery?

(CHUCKLES) The treachery is that...
you're not talking to Tristan.

Whoever that is.

I'm sorry.

Don't be.

It's not your fault my mind is broken.

Tristan d*ed
the instant the Hollow k*lled Elijah

and wiped out his entire sire line.

My beloved brother d*ed in a box

at the bottom of the ocean in agony.

Hope. What is that?

Oh, this? This is plan B.

NECROMANCER: I'm truly sorry,

but the name of this bar
should be Falcon's Landing.

I think it's time I wished myself
across the pond to Peace

- before it comes to that.
- LANDON: We're in this together.

At least, until we're not.

Either way,
the third wish is yours, right?

And based on what we know now,

Dr. Saltzman's wish
has a lot to accomplish.

It's got to bring our souls back
from Limbo,

put them back into our bodies...

two of which are dead,
one of which is alive...

and somehow has to bypass
the Ferryman's powers

so we don't just end up back here.

ALARIC: Landon, you were pretty shook up
when you got back.

What else is going wrong
in the real world,

other than me being brain-dead?

Nothing that can't wait.

NECROMANCER: What's the plan, then?

The same plan we'd use
to fight a monster.

If we're gonna att*ck this problem,

we need to know how to defeat it.

If everyone in here
is playing the jinni's game,

talking to them
might help us learn more.

Figure out how to win it.

ALARIC: Well, you boys get to it.

I need a minute to finish this drink

and ponder the stress being in a coma
must be putting on my daughters.

♪ Your tender eyes ♪

♪ For me alone ♪

♪ No longer can I hold... ♪

I know that look.

Need another drink?

Maybe something a little stronger?

LIZZIE: We don't need a plan B,

because she already told me her plan A.

I know more about the gods
than I ever thought I would.

We got what you wanted.
All the information we need.

(CRYING)

Is that true?

Yes.

But I went through all this trouble
to make this for you.

LIZZIE: Hope, you're better than this.

Not anymore.

HOPE: You never should have told me
about Papa Tunde's blade.

You see, this isn't nearly
as fancy or powerful,

but I hope it is just as painful.

(AURORA SHOUTS)

(PANTING)

Actus.

(GASPING)

Well, it took some careful coaxing
from a kraken,

but I think we managed
to gather some useful intel.

No one's ever b*at the jinni.

Yeah.

I don't think any of that's
gonna be helpful.

Sure, it is. Because the kraken
is still playing the game.

It's been pondering
its third and final wish for decades.

I was wrong about the jinni.
It's not using our language against us,

it's using our desperation.

We need to get home,

but we have plenty of time
to figure out how to do that.

To search Limbo for someone or thing
that can help us learn more...

- Mm.
- Find a way to craft the perfect wish.

(ALARIC SIGHS)
Yeah. Like I said. Not helpful.

NECROMANCER:
Then say more. Why not, huh?

Because he used our second wish
while we were gone.

What do you mean?

What for?

I wished for you
to become The Necromancer again.

How did you imagine this would work?

You betray me and then I do
exactly as you say,

like a, like a good little Necromancer?

Better start apologizing soon.
He's getting more Necro by the second.

Which means the sooner
you bring us back to life,

the sooner you can
wish yourself to Peace.

I should do it right now.

Leave you both here to suffer.

What did I do?

Well, then, why don't you?

I... I'm not sure.

Oh, I am.

Because you're the guy who proved to me
that people like us can change,

when you sacrificed your life
for my students.

And you've backed
our every move here in Limbo.

And where did that get me?

It's gonna get you to Peace.

Look, if there were any other way,
I would have wished for it.

But The Necromancer's powers

are the only thing
that can bring us back to life

without the Ferryman interfering.

Mm.

(LAUGHS)

Yeah, the Ferryman's powers
are no match for mine.

(LAUGHS): Oh, no.

His bones quake
at the mention of my name.

Ted?

- Your name is Ted.
- Our friend.

(CHUCKLES)

(GROANING)

I am not Ted. You made sure of that.

Well, you need to be.

To summon just enough power
to do the spell.

What spell?

I kind of assumed you'd know.

(SHOUTS)

Fine! Maybe I do.

But I can't concentrate
with all this pressure, so get out.

- Begone.
- Come on, Landon, let's go.

HOPE: It's a good thing I put up
that muting spell.

She's a real squealer.

Hope, there's nothing good
about what you're doing.

- She's a monster.
- Maybe.

But at least I know why she's hurting,
where she's coming from.

You, on the other hand...

- She started it.
- And you wanted to end it.

At least you did until you started
making up excuses not to.

And torturing her?

That is what monsters do.

My humanity is off.

The whole reason it shut off
in the first place

is because you lost someone you love.

- Like she did. Like I have.
- Ugh.

Your sister went on vacation.
And your dad is still alive.

Stop trying to appeal
to my emotions, okay?

- I don't have any.
- Hatred is an emotion.

And in my experience,
you can only hate what you could love,

if things were a little different.

So maybe what you hate
is how much you relate to Aurora.

I know I do.

Well, I don't relate to you at all.

But don't worry, that's about to change.

How?

Follow me. I'll show you.

(SIGHS)

Why don't you just tell me
about this secret you've been keeping?

LANDON: Maybe I should tell you
why I've been keeping it.

I was afraid of what you'd do.

Not that it matters.
You still screwed things up.

Hey, I came clean with you
about what happened to Hope.

Yeah, and maybe you shouldn't have.

Because everything that has followed

has been a series of increasingly risky,
desperate moves.

And that's bad enough,

but if we can't even trust each other
while we're making them?

And how am I supposed to trust you
when you're the one lying to me?

The secret's about Hope.

And Josie and Lizzie.

Landon, tell me what's going on.

NECROMANCER: Problem solved!

My problem, that is, eh?

Yours is only beginning,
because I am The Necromancer.

And I'm back, baby!

(LAUGHS)

Yeah!

NECROMANCER:
I'm grateful you brought me back,

but I will not be returning you
and birdbrain there

to your pathetic lives after all.

Ted, listen to me...

No, Ted is dead!

I'm the Knight of Nightmares.
The Monarch of Misery!

We got it.

Yeah? Well, I got something, too.

A parting gift from Ted: his wish,
to punish you for all you've done.

You know, if you want to t*rture us,
you should just send us back home.

(LAUGHS)

You must have feathers in your brain.

That would be giving you
exactly what you want.

Oh, I doubt that.

It's time I told you
what's happening in the real world.

LIZZIE: Whatever you have in mind,

I don't want to do it.

She's suffering, Hope.

So are you.

But don't worry, her pain's almost over,

because that is about to change.

Maybe you'll be less judgmental
when you have blood on your hands, too.

Screw you. I won't do it.

(LAUGHS SOFTLY)

The sire bond says otherwise.

k*ll her.

(EXHALES)

Didn't you hear me?

Bury that stake in her heart.

- I command you.
- Hope, please.

We were friends.

We are friends.

As much as I hate
what you're doing right now...

- I still love you.
- Then prove it.

k*ll her.

(EXHALES)

(SCREAMS)

(GASPS)

If you wish to k*ll me, child,
don't make a mess of it.

(SIGHS) You missed.

I know her heart's tiny,
but it's a couple of inches over.

I know.

I meant to.

Which means I broke the sire bond.

(SCREAMS)

(PANTING)

(NECROMANCER LAUGHS)

Oh...

This is rich.

His one daughter's a Heretic,
the other one's gone away,

and Hope's become a villain
like her father?

LANDON:
Which is why if you send us back home,

you'll be sending us into the teeth
of our worst nightmares.

Plus, you get to keep Ted's wish,
which you can use

to break your contract with the jinni.
It's a win-win.

No, there has to be a catch.

Only if you think we're capable
of figuring all that out.

(LAUGHS): Oh...

No, you'll only make things worse.

He'll probably have a heart att*ck,
wind up right back here.

How could you keep this from me?

Look, if we had been sent back,

we'd have to figure out a way
to flip Hope's switch.

You'd find out
about your daughters, panic,

and make a bad decision for everyone
like you always do.

If Ted can change, so can I.

(NECROMANCER LAUGHS) Not a chance.

If Limbo's taught us anything,
it's that we are who we've always been.

Which is why I'm sending you back,
but not him.

What? That's not fair.

I know. It's perfect.

The headmaster goes back
and fails everybody again,

but racked with guilt all the while,

knowing that your genuinely decent soul

is trapped here with me forever!

(LAUGHS)

Landon, this isn't good.

Then prove him wrong, Dr. Saltzman.

Be better.

Work with your students,
find a way to get through to Hope...

without taking it all on yourself
like you always do.

Any final words?

- Take care of each other.
- (LAUGHS)

Oh, we will do nothing of the sort.

And you will take care
of nothing and no one.

Mate, I'd wish you luck, but...

we all know that would be
a waste of a wish, don't we?

Yeah.

(MONITOR BEEPING STEADILY)

(NECROMANCER CHUCKLES)

ZIED: Ah.
I see your second wish has been...

effectual?

I brought this soul back to work
in your salvation army.

Well, you'll be enlisting, too.

Unless, of course,
you use your last wish

to send yourself to Peace.

Never.

What I wish for
is to be free of my contract with you.

That is fortunate.

Yeah.

For me.

What do you mean by that?

LANDON: If I had to guess,

it means Dr. Saltzman screwed you
on his way out.

Indeed.

The third member of your party

wished for you
to become The Necromancer again,

but that your powers only be capable
of returning him

and the boy to life.

That's preposterous.

He also specified

that if you wished for anything
other than Peace,

your third and final wish
be rendered null and void.

Oh, that bastard.

You let him do all that?

The choice was ultimately yours.

Your servitude...

begins at midnight.

(GRUNTING)

Can I get you something to drink?

Forget I asked.
Stay as long as you like.

Why did you save me?

LIZZIE: In classic
Lizzie Saltzman fashion, it was selfish.

I just... couldn't let you die
without apologizing.

For what?

Calling you crazy.

Being dismissive.

Judging your symptoms
and not their cause.

Treating you
the same way everyone treated me

whenever I'd have an episode.

I used to think of my brain
as a weakness, but...

maybe all the issues I've struggled with

are what allowed me
to break the sire bond.

In your defense, I can be quite...
symptomatic at times.

You lost someone you love.

♪ In my mind there was time... ♪

But no amount of lashing out
will ever bring them back.

I think I learned that today,
thanks to Hope.

If you're trying to get me
to forget about Tristan...

No, I'm not.

I know the hole a sibling leaves
in your heart never goes away.

All I'm asking
is that you do something to heal it,

instead of staying stuck on revenge.

He's dead, Elizabeth.
There is nothing I can do.

I'm not so sure about that.

♪ I-I am not okay ♪

♪ I'm not okay... ♪

These gods you were looking for
have all kinds of powers.

Including the ability
to wield and shape time.

They could take us back.

Back to when Tristan was alive?

To when my father wasn't broken.

When Hope had her humanity.

When Josie was still with me.

Well, it's not a bad idea,

but I've run out of inspiration,
I'm afraid.

Where would we even begin?

I stole this from Hope.

It turns out I've already met Vulcan,
so we can start by finding her.

NECROMANCER:
I wouldn't look so confident.

You're doomed to spend eternity
in this hell, by my side.

(LAUGHS)

I'm looking forward to it.

Do explain.

I mean, of course I wanted to get back
and help the people I love,

but if I have to stay here,
I can still help people.

Getting them to Peace.

Doesn't sound like hell to me.

Guess that's why I'm a glass half-full
kind of guy and you are...

I'm The Necromancer. I necromance.

That's what I do, not help people.

So if I'm trapped here... (LAUGHS)

...you mark my words,
I will make this your hell.

You will try.

At least until I find a way
to get you to Peace.

I made a promise to Ted,
which I intend to keep.

Let's just hope
Dr. Saltzman does the same.

(EXHALES)

(GASPS)

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS)

WADE: Whoa, Dr. Saltzman, whoa, whoa.

Take it easy. Come on. (GRUNTS)

Wade? (LAUGHS) How did you know?

That Kaleb was your emergency contact?

I didn't, until the hospital
called the school.

The AV club has been monitoring

all of the school's phones
in your absence,

and I take my duties as president
very seriously.

Ah, well, I'm glad some things
haven't changed since I've been gone.

Where's Kaleb?

He's out parking his car.

But it's not the sweet ride
that you remember.

Because a lot has changed
at the Salvatore School.

I mean, with Hope and Josie and Lizzie.

Yeah, I know. Landon told me.

- But my boy's dead.
- Uh...

I'll explain everything
as soon as Kaleb gets here.

'Cause I'm gonna need you,
him and everyone else

to figure out where we go
from here, okay?

(TIRES SCREECH)

MAN: Do you need help?

I'm not exactly sure.

Well, you're going to,

if you keep standing out in the middle
of the road like this. I...

I could've k*lled you.

That wouldn't be very humane, would it?

You on dr*gs?

dr*gs numb people. Um...
I'm having the opposite problem.

I feel like I may actually be
starting to feel things.

Um...

things like gratitude.

Betrayal.

I even had the slightest urge
to thank you for stopping.

(LAUGHS)

♪ Your feelings... ♪

What if Lizzie is right about me?

♪ In this game... ♪

What's the definition of humanity?

Beats me. But you seem
like you're in a pretty rough place.

I could call the cops if you want.

Um, could give you a lift,
get you some help.

That's good. That's good.
Yeah, keep doing that.

You're starting to creep me out.

No, one last thing, one last thing,
before I let you go. Um...

What would you call someone

who could k*ll a person
without ever meeting them before?

A decent person like you.

On second thought...

don't worry about it.
You've been very helpful.

♪ This is tragic ♪

(MAN GRUNTING)

Not that I care.