03x02 - Not Just Cards

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Good Girls". Aired: February 26, 2018 - July 22, 2021.*
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Sisters Beth and Annie and their best friend Ruby become fed up with playing by the rules and not getting the respect they deserve, they band together to take control of their lives.
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03x02 - Not Just Cards

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on "Good Girls"...

They're gonna take the house.

I made you something.

It's literally
nail polish remover,

hydrogen peroxide, and bleach.

She's a terrible human being,

and she thinks,
because she lives

in this clean little bubble,
that on one's gonna notice.

Be good, okay?

Maybe the man
just needed a greeting card.

Throw it on.

Thanks again
for working your magic.

I wish I could do more.

I m*rder*d the kids' dad,
all right?

Marcus' dad... he sets us up.

- What if he doesn't come back?
- How much?

I'm not taking your money.

Can we not use the phrase
"a friend."

He's dead.

One last name popped up.

♪ In the place
where you lay ♪

♪ In the shimmer above ♪

♪ In the rust and the oil ♪

Well, how much
did you get for it?

300.

Well, where am I
supposed to put my clothes?

Where you put 'em now.

♪ There's nowhere
to run to ♪

♪ You forget
where you've been ♪

♪ Your shadow is shrinking ♪

You know
that grandfather clock has been

in my family
for, like, two generations?

The girls think it's haunted.

Yeah, with the Boland dynasty.

It has nine bids, Dean.

♪ Rage on ♪

♪ Helpless ♪

♪ Reach out ♪

Well, what about
your country, rustic thingy?

No offers yet.

So surprised.

We need the money, okay?

♪ Reach out ♪

♪ Sightless ♪

- I got to pay her back, Dean.
- I just got to pay her back.

♪ Soundless ♪

Hey, Mama.

- Daddy!
- What's up, man?

How you doing?

Need to get that doorbell fixed.

Hey, Mom.

I made you something.

- Want to see it?
- Yeah.

- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

Check it out.

- It's cool?
- Yeah.

Yeah?

He missed you.

I'm back now.

So what's up?

Can you come to one of my games?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, Mama got you hoopin' now?

No, soccer.

- Soccer?
- Yeah.

How you get into that?

A mom friend at the park.

♪ Rage on ♪

♪ Soundless ♪

We're not paying her
to check Instagram.

It's fine, it's fine.

We're paying her to make sure
that our baby doesn't die.

- All right.
- All right.

Uh...

To nationals, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Resolved... that my son
is the coolest, smartest,

most talkiest debater in
all of southeastern Michigan...

Okay.

Soon to be the entire nation.

Mom.

Yay, Sadie!

Ben.

Of course, yeah...

- I'm... I'm sorry.
- It's okay.

Takes a minute.

Ben.

- To Ben.
- To Ben, to Ben.

Your order will be up
in just a minute.

- Thanks.
- Oh.

So now that we're all to...

- Can I have a green tea?
- Mm-hmm.

So we wanted to thank you.

Oh...

- For what?
- No, no, not here.

We're in couples therapy.

Oh, yep, there it is.

And... and we're really doing
great work.

Well, I guess we have
a lot to celebrate.

And Dr. Cohen mentioned
that you could possibly play

a role in our healing.

Ew.

Well, that's not really
what he said exactly.

Well, honey, he did say

that she's the reason
that you slipped up.

- Excuse me.
- Can I use the restroom?

- Yes.
- Yes, now.

Please.

Okay, look,
in the spirit of Ben...

What else did, uh,
Dr. Cohen say?

What if we just table
this debate, huh?

Well, he said
that you're a tiny bit...

broken.

Wow.

And a little bit lost.

- Wow.
- Oh, God.

And that you are trying
to fix yourself

by using my husband's...

you know...

And... and that it's just
kind of, like,

this dysfunctional pattern,

and it is going to
keep repeating itself

until we all...

figure this out.

It's deep stuff.

- Mm.
- Yeah.

- Yeah.
- What's your take, Gregg?

Um, just that if you would like

to talk with him

that we would cover it.

I have his card.

Here.

Your Dante's Inferno.

You sure?

We got to pay electric.

What about our phone?

Send the check
for phone to water.

Send the water to phone.

They see we had good intentions.

Yeah, take 'em at least
a couple weeks to sort out.

And we still take showers.

Yeah, well, not Li'l Money.

Truly, he smells like
hamsters and burps.

I hate how good we are at this.

- I know.
- Bill roulette.

Hey, still works.

Hey, Darryl.

When?

What do you mean by "helping"?

Pointing out everything
that I'm doing wrong.

Dog,
I've been on that for years.

Oh, she's more specific...

Like where I keep my trash bags,

what I feed my kids,

the way I wear my "rouge,"
as she puts it.

Too much, right?

Too little.

Hmm.

Hey, uh, this hot dog
tastes weird.

It's been spinning under
a light bulb for three days.

I need a refund.

- You bought gas station meat.
- Make better choices.

Hey, can I talk to your manager?

Ooh.

Just kick her ass to the curb.

She's cleaning
and doing the laundry.

She ironed Dean's underwear.

It's Ruby.

Hey, lady.

Do you guys sell flowers?

Jesus.

Yeah.

What is up with the
teddy bears at these things?

I just mean...
they were adults.

Everybody go to the same Kroger
to get flowers?

Can you not?

I'm just saying.

The man is dead, okay?

He did try to frame Stan.

Annie.

And lock us up.

He lost his life.

Okay.

That's not how that works.

You all right?

It is really weird.

Guess we're back in business.

Here's what we do.

Little help here?

We print 20 mil, one big run,
buy a giant super yacht.

Can I put
my mother-in-law on it?

Round-the-world cruise?

Round and round
and then round again.

No, because we sell it

for a fleet of private jets...

money washed.

Boom.

What do we do with jets?

Sell 'em to the Saudis.

Boom.

- Stop saying "boom."
- Um, and we need that.

Fine.

How would you wash the money?

What would he do?

She means g*ng friend.

Yeah, I connected those dots.

He outsourced.

Yeah, we did that, and we got
banned from Costco for life.

Literally, I grocery shop
at the dollar store.

Okay...

what if we didn't use
people like us?

You mean like people like him?

Yeah.

Where do we find those people?

Hey, how was soccer?

I got to play goalie.

- I thought Marcus was goalie.
- He didn't come today.

- Hello, ladies.
- Hi.

Your rouge is just lovely.

Free sample.

Oh, what about mine, Judith?

Please, you've got youth.

Beth, are you home for dinner,

or will you be at the card shop?

It's not just cards, Judith.

They have gifts and...

You sold my clock?

My ancestors brought that

across the country
in a covered wagon.

Well, it's going back across
to Phil Hanson in a box truck.

Well, it's your wedding gift.

I'll start the stroganoff.

I mean, her rouge is on point.

I hate you both.

- See you, Dean.
- Yeah, have a good one.

- Bye, guys.
- Bye.

Hey, you.

How do you like my fish?

Can't wait to catch my own.

I just wish I knew how
to get my sales up, you know?

I got to let you in
on something, Dean.

It'll be our secret.

No one needs a hot tub.

Okay.

Well, how'd you get all those?

Landscapers,
contractors, realtors.

It's a relationship game.

I'll tell you, it sucks to be
the new kid at school.

Why don't I introduce you?

Seriously?

- Come to dinner Thursday.
- I'm meeting some developers.

Thanks.

I'll head back.
Thank you.

How is it being
a mental patient?

It's okay.

What's your damage?

My parents
are getting a divorce.

What's that got to do with you?

They're my parents.

Yeah, so, like,
why aren't they here?

I don't know.

You do dr*gs?

No.

You got a girlfriend?

There's a girl I sort of like.

Well, she like you back?

She sits next to me on the bus.

You're fine.

Hey, come on in, Tim.

Actually, one sec.

This'll just take a sec.

Real quick, Tim.
Here we go.

- Yeah.
- Okay.

What's Otsego University?

A nationally accredited college.

Where's the campus?

- Online.
- Bingo.

Well, your country's
quite stingy with visas.

Oh, so you're illegal.

Are you from the board?

You know, you might want to
lay down for this, Dr. Cohen...

No one really does that.

Because I am not lost,
I'm not broken,

and I am certainly
not the reason

that Gregory
cheated on his wife.

- You hear me?
- Loud and clear.

- Yeah.
- Good, good, good.

Because I'm about to deliver
some straight talk

that's gonna help you
render your verdict

or whatever it is
you people call it.

We call it a diagnosis.

He came to me, okay?

He came to me because
that marriage is a joke.

Mm-hmm, yeah.

So it's not really my fault
that he got tired of boning

an ice queen whose idea
of getting wild

is leaving her bra on
for a quickie.

Oh, man, I mean,
who'd want to tap that?

Well, not her husband,

especially not after being
locked up in a McMansion

where you can't even choose
your own outfits,

or, God forbid,
you try to talk about something

other than ways
to jack up your face

with lip fillers
and butt cement.

- Wow.
- Yeah.

Yeah, it sounds like
they've got you all wrong.

Yes, yes.

Now, what are you
gonna do about it, Otsego?

Oh, uh, I don't need
a prescription, okay?

- Oh, no, that's fine.
- That's fine.

Um... here's who
you're looking for, I think...

Dr. Eli Cohen.

I'm Josh Cohen.

I work with kids.

Yeah, um, Eli's upstairs
in a suite.

Oh.

- You'll like him.
- He went to a real college.

Well, thank you for listening.

On the house.

That's so nice.

- Do you mind sending Tim in?
- No, not at all.

- Thanks.
- I'll just...

Oh, Tim?

- No, leave it open.
- Yeah.

"Coal black"?

Now, how's that different
from coal gray and ink black?

Hold it to the light.

I mean, where is this guy?

Why can't they just make
black black?

- Is anyone working?
- You know, funeral black.

You know, say exactly what
you need it for.

- Oh, okay, I see.
- It's like that.

All right, we're out of here.

I need to buy a suit, Ruby.

- You got to go to this thing?
- The man tried to put you away.

Okay, I'm going
for the families.

Be right with you, folks.

Oh, really?

Okay, okay, calm down, chief.

I mean, the time to be
right with us is long gone.

Babe, not now.

How we doing over here?

We were better
before you started

Snapchatting your bestie.

- I'm so sorry.
- I didn't see you.

And that, Brian,
is exactly the problem.

Yeah, so do you guys,
uh, validate

even if you don't buy anything?

Let's go, Stanley!

Hey, I'm just checking in.

Uh, Jane said that Marcus
wasn't at soccer today,

so, um...

I hope he doesn't have that bug
that's going around.

Danny had it last week.
It's really brutal.

I'm waiting for it to take out
the rest of us.

Um, anyway, uh, yeah,
just call me back.

I hope you guys are okay.

Hey, how much, uh... how much
cash do you have on you?

Why?

We need to tip
the movers pretty big.

Why?

Well, I kind of... I kind of
stepped in it with one of them.

Which one?

The guy with the tat
with the girl on it...

the one with super detail
with the boobs, the nipple,

and the camel toe.

All right.

What did you say?

I made some stupid joke
about most movers

coming straight out of prison.

I wasn't even talking
about those guys.

Okay, so?

So they're straight
out of prison,

and the lead guy
with the tattoo thingy,

his rap sheet reads
like a CVS receipt.

He's telling me
like he's proud...

armed robbery,
forced entry, kidnapping,

something-class two
with animals.

We're talking
full-on criminal, Beth.

Lemonade?

We have an employee, okay?

He's gonna wash
exactly like we did, except...

Where did this guy go to prison?

- I don't know.
- He didn't have a résumé.

Yeah, but is he
more Martha Stewart

or Suge Knight?

I don't think he plays golf.

- Oh, great.
- So we're r*pe bait.

Well, can't get all of us.

I mean, not all at once.

- Great.
- So he gets me while you watch?

No, we run for help.

The point is, he's gonna wash
in ways that we can't.

So how's he gonna do it?

Not Costco.

How much are these?

$9.95.

50/50, right?

- What?
- No.

What we agreed on.

We said ten.

I meant 50.

Uh, Beth.

48 hours.

- Well, no one got r*ped.
- Sort of.

Ben's at a friend's.

- I-I came for you.
- No, no, no, no, no.

- It came out wrong, okay?
- Oh, which part...

the needy and slutty...

Or the lost and broken?

She's still hurt
and, like, super mad.

That I get.

It's just her way
of processing it, okay?

What I don't understand is
how you could possibly think

that your penis wasn't
equally at fault here, Gregg.

What do you want
me to do, Annie?

- Stand up for me for once.
- You didn't want me.

You had a baby with her.

Yeah, and now that's why
I got to try and fix it.

I feel bad for you.

Okay.

You know, you could see
every shrink on the planet,

and you'd still never sack up.

Nice.

Good luck
on your spiritual journey.

Got it.

Find the light, Gregory.

You know what?

You're lucky.

Why's that?

Because it must be nice
being just so perfect.

God is great. God is good.

By His blessings, we are fed.

Give us, Lord, our daily bread.

Amen.

- Mom.
- Hi, Mommy.

I thought you'd be selling
your cards tonight.

Not just cards, Judith.

Let me get you a seat.

So we're praying at dinner now?

Yeah, Mom thought
it would be fun.

Hmm.

How'd it go today?

He sold another Boland.

That's not
what they're called, Mom.

Tell that to the Jacuzzi family.

Are we going to be famous?

Ooh, when Daddy has his own
spa named after him, yes.

We're a long way
from that, dear.

There you go.

Mommy's in the baby chair.

What do you call
a cow who's masturbating?

Beef stroganoff.

Get it?
It's a cow that's, you know...

Kenneth Irving Boland.

Kenny, why don't you go
do your homework?

He needs to finish his dinner.

So the Jacuzzis
were actually brothers.

Do you want to be finished, KB?

- Yeah.
- Go play video games.

They've had plenty
of screen time.

And throw in some YouTube.

There were seven of 'em,

and they started out
making airplane propellers.

Got to be in the clean-plate
club to get dessert.

One of 'em d*ed
in a plane crash, and...

they decided to scrap it

and... and just focus on impellers

and hydrodynamics instead.

You can have
as much dessert as you want.

All I know is there are
plenty of starving children

in Africa that would love
to have this food.

Ship it to 'em.

Come on, let's go crush
some brownies.

- I'm in the clean-plate club!
- Me too!

I want brownies!

I get the first on!

And that's how they got

in the whirlpool game.

I appreciate you helping us out.

Did Dean ever tell you I worked?

No.

After he was born,

I was sitting on a bag
of frozen peas,

squirting water down there
so I could tinkle

without my parts catching fire.

Nobody tells you what it's like.

That you'll come out
all stitched back together

like Humpty Dumpty.

We'd never have kids.

And everyone's fawning
over this perfect baby boy,

while I'm just...

Nothing...

empty,
flesh and hormones over ice.

I had postpartum after Jane.

Back then, they called it
"a nervous condition."

Judith.

So I became a shopgirl.

Got dressed up, dropped
the baby with a neighbor,

took the bus downtown,
and you know what?

I felt like a person again...

with a purpose.

Why'd you stop?

I made a quarter
of what John made,

and my son was being raised
by wolves.

Dean's boss called him
management material.

Your happiness
was important, too.

How much does the card shop pay?

You shouldn't have quit.

And you should be home
for dinner

if you don't want
the kids saying grace.

What a lie, huh?

That we can have it all.

That's the dumbest thing
I've ever heard.

It's no crazier
than saying "Jacuzzi."

Ooh, I slept funny.

I know something
that could work that right out.

- All right.
- What's that?

Take a Boland.

Nice, steamy Boland.

Oh, a big, bubbling Boland.

Coming in off the ski slopes.

Rough day at work?

Grab your favorite magazine.

Pop out back.

Step into a foamy Boland.

Yeah!

Where is this guy?

- I don't know.
- I don't know if he's lost.

- Text him.
- I just did.

What if he went
to the paper place?

I gave him the address.

What if he's not coming?

Yo.

- Hi.
- It's Beth.

I'm just calling
for a quick ETA.

I'm not gonna make it.

Oh, uh...

do you need to reschedule?

No, I'm good.

But you owe us some money.

Yeah, I did some math,
and it works out

way better for me
if I take 100%.

What?

Hello?

Did he say "math" or "meth"?

- Call him back.
- And do what?

Say "please"?

You have reached
the voice mailbox of 313...

Let's do what he would do.

He would make him eat a Glock.

Okay, let's do that.

Beth, you're not
a scary gangbanger

with throat tats.

You're a mom with
a Chinese symbol on your hip

you got on Spring Break.

Wait, I thought
you got that lasered.

It is so expensive.

You are never gonna be him.

So let's just suck it up,
print some more.

Are you serious?

- We have the plates.
- We have the press.

That last run cost us
a grand in ones.

We have to find
another career criminal.

What happens when that guy
decides to renegotiate?

Then we make more.

And then that guy?

We make more.

And then every criminal
in the city knows

that we're a bunch of suckers.

Well, can't have it all.

I'm a pillar of the community.

I organize
the neighborhood watch.

I'm on the PTA,
Chamber of Commerce.

I post on Yelp,
Angie's List, Nextdoor.

I am a den mother,
for God's sake.

Ma'am, again, I apologize...

Yeah, well, that's not gonna
put the 500 bucks

back in my son's piggy bank.

Do you know how many lawns
he had to mow for that?

Now, is it possible...

that he misplaced it?

Really?

$500 goes missing
on the exact day

that this guy
is loose in my house?

I didn't take
this bitch's money.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.

A lot of strong emotions here.

I just want my money.

You might want to be careful
about who you're coming at

with all these accusations.

No, I-I am sure
that we can work something out.

Or this bitch could take it up

with his parole officer.

How many violations do you get
before they send you back?

We're gonna take
another good look around.

I'd appreciate that.

What's this?

Don't start.

I hope it's not
a coal black suit.

Yep, and I got
the pocket square, too.

Why would you go back there?

They're the only place
that does layaway.

How long did you wait?

Please let me make my sandwich
How long?

You're exhausting.

Maybe you need
to be more exhausting.

And what does that mean?

You're so used
to being disrespected,

you don't even see it
happening anymore.

Babe, you go HAM
every time they seat us

by a bathroom in a restaurant.

Why should we sit
by the bathroom?

- Somebody's got to.
- It's unappetizing.

- Babe, ask them to move.
- I shouldn't have to.

And I should be able
to enjoy dinner with my family

without feeling like the
whole world is out to get us.

So you just want to pretend
it's not happening?

I just want buying a suit
to be buying a suit.

They're UV protected,
maintenance-free.

We can match the color
of any deck, any siding,

no matter what, guaranteed.

Where have you been hiding
this one, Gayle?

- Just my secret w*apon.
- Oh.

Looking forward to more, Dean.

- Yes, sir.
- Drinks on us next time.

Next time we are drinking
to celebrate a big sale.

Bye, you guys, drive safe.

- All right?
- Thanks so much.

What did I tell you?

I am serious.
You're a natural.

Oh, I had a pretty good teacher.

Maybe it's about
making the right connection.

Oh, thanks, man.

Oh, wait, I had the, uh...
I had the gray Buick.

Those are mine.

This is gonna be fun, huh?

For sure.

Hey, it's me.

I'm not trying to stalk you
or anything.

I'm just a little worried.

Um...

I hope I'm crazy,
and you and Marcus

are having fun somewhere.

Um...

call me or text me
or, um, whatever.

How is that your breakfast?

Savory sweet.

Disgusting.

It's like huevos rancheros.

Except no huevos.

And no rancheros.

- I'm a grown-up.
- I can eat whatever I want.

Comprende?

So he just showed up
with all of it?

Minus his cut, yeah.

We should've kept his share.

Show him who's boss.

Easy to say when
you're not in the dark backyard

with him
and his big old meat hands.

So let's go divvy up.

Yeah, I'm gonna buy Ben a pony.

You know,
those really tiny ones?

Does he want a pony?

What kid doesn't want a pony?

- Girl, you have bills.
- I mean with the extra.

Or instead of a pony...

we take this profit,

and we get more ones.

And then what?

We print more money.

And then what?

We make more.

- Yeah?
- And then what?

- Whatever we want.
- Yeah.

I mean, it's what he would do.

- Hmm?
- He wouldn't do that.

You're jealous.

Here, you two can join
the syrup-on-your-face club.

Don't get it anywhere near me.

Come on.

I don't want it
anywhere near me.

We're accepting new members.

Yikes.

Hey.

- Hey.
- How'd you do?

Well...

Some dude gave me a 20
to park his E-Class out front.

- Gross.
- Yeah.

I horked in his water bottle
and stole all his change.

So how's my Nance?

She keeps saying my name
to prove she's cool with it.

Hi, Ben.

How was school today, Ben?

Would you like a boba, Ben?

Boba Ben, Ben, Ben, boba?

She's so woke.

Yeah, ever since
she got therapized.

That whole thing was so wrong.

You know who I think
needs a therapist?

Therapists.

Jenny's mom's a therapist.

And she went to rehab
for Ritalin.

Why are they
up your butt anyway?

You don't need a therapist.

Thank you.

- You tell me everything.
- I solve your problems.

I-I mean, not everything.

Good thing I'm free,
'cause you'd go broke.

So how's this supposed
to work, anyway?

Just talk about
what's bothering you.

Yeah, but
what do people usually say?

Well, most of my patients
are younger,

so lots of complaints
about brushing teeth,

going to bed early,
wanting more screen time.

- This is stupid.
- I'm gonna go.

Okay.

Aren't you gonna try to stop me?

I can't help you
if you don't have any problems.

Got a problem
with your attitude.

What else?

Well, this bean-bag chair
kind of smells like pee.

There is a reason for that.

What else?

- Babe.
- Yeah?

Was I like this when you met me?

No, you hid it better.

You should've
checked references.

Honestly, I'm angry, too, babe,

but you just can't live
in it all the time.

What if I found a way to stop?

Oh, yeah, sure, there's, um,
yoga, meditations,

church has got a bunch
of different fellowships.

What if it was something
you wouldn't like?

But we wouldn't have to sit

next to the bathroom ever again?

I thought we said never again.

You look real good in that suit.

Nice.

Pass this down to Daddy.

Daddy gets the big piece.

- There we go.
- Nice.

Here you go.

- Hey, Mom.
- Hey.

I was defrosting a casserole.

Oh, the kids wanted pizza.

Yeah, come, uh...
come sit down, have a slice.

- Come on, guys, help me out.
- Pass it, come on, let's go.

- I put you here next to Kenny.
- Is pepperoni okay?

Uh-huh.

All right, team Boland,
check in.

How's everyone's day?
Thank you.

Oh, really?

Nobody has anything
to say at all?

Ooh, I k*lled a frog in science.

Oh, that's gnarly.

I finally made sense
of that pantry of yours.

I had a pretty good day.

Yeah?

I got an opportunity
to make some real money.

They want to promote me
to manager.

- No way.
- Yay, Mommy.

- Is that better than worker?
- Way better.

I get salary. I get commission
on every event.

That's awesome.

They're even talking
profit sharing.

What about the hours?

Well, that's the best part,
because we'll be able to afford

help now and you don't have
to worry about us anymore.

- That is incredible.
- Congratulations.

And, you guys, how about we say
thank you to Nana?

- Thanks, Nana.
- Thank you, Nana.

We couldn't have done it
without you.

Work.

Cheers.

Thank you.

Oh, my God,
I was worried about you.

And Marcus is okay?

No, no, no, no, no,
I totally get it.

Well, listen,
I've got your money,

and it's, like, totally burning
a hole in my pocket.

I know, but I'm not good
at this stuff.

Hey, you want to get a drink
or something?

Dean's mom is here, and it's,
like, this whole thing.

You're gonna die.

Can I get you anything?

I'll wait for my friend.

She ain't coming.

I think you might need
that drink, huh?
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