01x05 - Groundhog Day

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Money Heist". Aired: May 2, 2017 - present.*
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A criminal mastermind who goes by "The Professor" has a plan to pull off the biggest heist in recorded history -- to print billions of euros in the Royal Mint of Spain.
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01x05 - Groundhog Day

Post by bunniefuu »

-"I’m waiting for instructions.
-I have a sh*t at the kidnapper."

-What the f*ck are you doing?
-There are f*cking sn*pers.

-On your knees.
-"They’re aiming."

-Give me the green light.
-"They’re going to execute them.

-They’re going to sh**t.
-I request to open fire."

Put down the g*n!

"They’re going to k*ll them."

Green light.

-Condor , open fire.
-Behind you.

SATURDAY
: PM

Good! Good, Mr Torres. Good. Very good.

But now let’s change the series, okay?

Let’s change the letter, all right?

Another country, yes.
Don’t complain. Come on.

Helsinki! Come down, hurry up.

-What have we got?
-He’s seriously injured. Hurry up!

You k*lled her, m*therf*ckers.

Hurry up.

Water, water, please.

Water, please. Water.

Thanks. Arturo, hold on tight. Rio, Rio!

Alcohol, alcohol.

I need you to take your hand off...

-Raquel.

"Ex-employees of the paper money factory

have revealed the identity
of the man hurt by the police.

It’s Arturo Román,
the general manager of the factory,

who has just been hurt
by the police forces,

while he was on the roof with the robbers.

The events took place after hours
since the beginning of the kidnapping."

HOURS OF ROBBERY

I need to talk to my wife, please.

I need to talk to my wife.

"They say that when we’re at Death’s door

we’re finally able to see
our life with clarity.

And Arturo Román, losing blood on a table,

was waiting for that:
Death’s clairvoyance.

To find out once and for all
who the love of his life had been.

Laura, the woman with whom
he had shared years

of holy matrimony?

Or Mónica, his secretary and lover,

with whom he had felt young again?

Unfortunately, the only certainty
Arturo had at that moment

was that, if they didn’t take out
the b*llet,

he’d kick the bucket
before solving the enigma.

And, frankly, our first aid courses
weren’t a guarantee for living."

Inferior cava.

Right renal.

Left.

Mesenteric.

Right pulmonary.

Left.

This is the heart.

Cava.

Subclavian, right and left.

Brachial.

Humeral.

Internal jugular.

External jugular.

And in red the main arteries.

Hey, stop, stop.

Let’s see.

Do you want us to learn medicine
this way, with two markers?

If anyone is sh*t,
he can’t go to a hospital.

You have to manage inside.

-It’ll be f*cking su1c1de.
-Shut the f*ck up.

One thing is
to lock ourselves up in that mouse trap.

-Another thing would be that we die.
-Denver.

We’re asking you to learn
how to take out a b*llet.

Don’t start
with "the epic tales about the outskirts".

It’s not that hard.

You get the pliers, take out the b*llet
without screwing it up.

-That’s all.
-The sh*t already screwed it up.

If they sh**t me, take me to the hospital.

The answer is "no."

Well, I prefer being lame and free

rather than with excellent health
but in a cell.

Nobody will go out.

Anyone of you is a clue
and a thread that can be pulled.

If somebody wants to resign,
this is the moment.

He will stay here during the robbery
and then he’ll leave.

Will the lesson last long?

My willy is shrinking like Helsinki’s.

Hey! What did you say about my willy?

-Enough. Enough.
-Do you want to see my willy?

Please.

Come on, get dressed.
Let another one lie here, please.

-Mr Willy.
-Come on.

Come on.

-No? No, no...
-Well, there we go.

-Well...
-Come on, Nairobi.

-It’s all right, isn’t it?
-Come on, Nairobi!

So sexy!

-She’s black.
-Sexy, sexy.

-Go on.
-Wow! Okay.

Let’s see what you learnt.

This is the carotid...

"And so, playing doctors,

I found out Nairobi was
more interesting than she seemed."

The heart.

The aorta...

"And, although nobody knew anything
about anyone,..."

The abdominal aorta.

"...what I never had suspected
was that Nairobi had a son.

Or a daughter.

As it seemed by her C-section scar."

-What are you doing? What are you doing?
-Hey, hey!

-Where are you going?
-What’s up?

What are you looking at?

-What’s up?
-Calm down.

No. You’re going to eat that marker.

-What’s up?
-She’s a bit of a lesbian.

Don’t know what the f*ck she’s looking at.

You’re the lesbian. Your nugget
was as hard as a sugar cube.

As a sugar cube? I’m going to...

Stop it!

"And that’s where our friendship started."

Raquel, the Ministry on the phone.

What shall I tell them?
Raquel? What shall I say?

-Raquel! What shall I say?
-Pardon?

-They’ll ask who gave the order.
-I gave the order.

Tell them... the wounded man is a hostage.

-And hang up the f*cking phone!
-He looked like a robber.

I asked for the green light. I insisted.

Inspector, I assume
responsibility with you.

Inspector, the ambulance is ready.

Let’s talk to the kidnapper.

"Preparing the communication
with the kidnapper."

We had to make a decision. They were...

It seemed they’d execute them,
we had to decide, there was no time.

Silence, please!

Professor?

"You fired upon the hostages.

One is between life and death.
I guess that’s why you’re calling."

I’ve got the ambulance
to evacuate the injured man.

Nobody’s getting out of here.

-That man is bleeding out.
-"Due to the b*llet you sh*t."

Will you let him die?

"Let me get a medical team there."

Professor, listen.

I know it was my mistake,

"but if a hostage dies,
it’ll be as awful for you as for me.

Believe me, in less"

than five minutes
public opinion will know that

that man d*ed

because you didn’t let us
come in and save his life.

"Two surgeons and a nurse
with surgical equipment.

-Let me know when they arrive."
-Thanks.

"I also have something to ask you."

The injured man wants to talk to his wife.

Of course.

Jesus.

Locate Mr Román’s wife.

When can the medical team be here?

By helicopter from La Paz,
or minutes.

-Bring them here. Now!
-Okay.

Places everyone, come on.

Please, places everyone.

Excuse me.

Can you drive?

Yes, yes.

I need to get out of here, go for a drive.

-Yes.
-Thanks.

Hey, Raquel.

What’s up?

I have to think.

Drive.

Don’t look at me like that.
I’m not leaving you alone.

Where the f*ck is she?

That bitch has escaped!

Let’s see...

I’m coming.

There we go.

Tell me, my child.

"Will you be able to come here tonight?"

-I don’t know, mum.
-"But why? What’s the matter?"

Mum, it’s...

I’m...

I made

"a very big mistake at work."

My child, your work is very difficult.

"Come on, tell me, there’s nothing"

that still seems so serious
five minutes after being told.

I was drinking wine with...

"I like that. With who?"

Do I know him?

No, mum. I don’t know him either.

The thing is...
When I came back to the tent,

there was a very serious situation,

"a risky one,
on the roof of the factory and...

I thought one of the hostages
was in danger,"

so I gave...

the order to open fire.

And an innocent man was sh*t.

-Yes. I’ve seen it on TV, my child.
-"Now I don’t know what to do."

I don’t know whether to phone his wife,

give a press conference, resign...
I don’t know what to do, mum.

Well, first of all, relax
and don’t blame yourself.

"They’re there with masks and g*ns,"

locked up, all jumbled up.

You only wanted
to protect the hostages, right?

"Honey... What if you had saved
somebody’s life?"

What? You wouldn’t be phoning me, right?

"Well...,

and now I..."

wouldn’t know that you meet strangers

"and have a drink with them."

God! I... I don’t meet strangers.

My child, we have
so little time in this life...

Okay, mum,
but that’s not the question now.

The question is I’m
in a critical situation at work.

Honey, send that work to hell.

"Why don’t you tell them
you want to stamp passports?

This way you may have some fun. Heavens!"

"Or do you think in the future you’ll be
holding hands with the kidnapper"

in an old people’s home?
You won’t, my child.

But maybe with that stranger...

"Don’t laugh, I know
what I’m talking about. I’ve been..."

a widow for years and...

Time doesn’t stop, my child.

And it doesn’t go back either, you know?

-Getting in the perimeter.
-I’ll think about it, mum.

If you see it’s late, go to bed,
all right?

Fine.

Listen and you go to bed

"with someone too."

RACHEL LIKES A STRANGER

-What the f*ck do you want?
-I don’t know. I saw that earlier and...

And it drew my attention.

I didn’t know what it was.

-Sorry.
-Okay, I forgive you.

Okay, see you later.

What are you doing?

b*at it, will you?
I don’t want any chitchat.

How old is he?

Your son.

Seven.

He’s seven.

Where’s he?

With his father?

With his father? Not with him.
He’s never been with his father.

We don’t know anything about his father.

What’s his name?

Axel.

His name’s Axel.

It means "axe."

-Axe.
-Yes.

-And he’s an ace.
-Right...

Just like his mother.

That child is a survivor, you know?

He has survived everything.

He’s like a cork in the middle of the sea,

he doesn’t sink.

That’s the way he is.

When he was three...

I had to take him away
from my mother’s house

because her husband...

gave him anisette when I wasn’t there,
because his sobs bothered him.

So I took him away.

Only the two of us, not needing a family.

Me and him.

And we were f*cking great.

But I screwed it up.

One day...

I had to go to get pills to sell.

And...

And I left him alone.

For five minutes.

I’d be away five minutes, right?

And he made a mess

with the f*cking Spider-Man.

I piss on Spider-Man!

Because he wanted to be a superhero.

He climbed everywhere.
He climbed very well.

And he got to the terrace
through the window.

There he took a chair, went on the chair

and shouted: "Mummy!"

"Mummy!"

He was three and a half.

Sure, five minutes later

we had a police patrol, the firemen...

Everybody.

They caught me with the pills,

with a record,

without a job.

And to prison I went.

So my child started moving
from one foster family to the next,

from hand to hand.

And I got nothing.

Nothing, huh?

I wasn’t allowed
a single visit, a single call...

Nothing.

Then I was released from prison...

and nothing happened.

They didn’t give him back to me.

-Have you seen him again?
-They won’t let me.

But...

I know where he is.

-Really?
-He’s in the Canary islands.

He’s with a family who owns a hotel.

He’s fine.

Are you going to go and get him?

I’m taking him...

and that’s final.

To the other side of the world.

I’m telling you one thing.

In this robbery

nobody’s going to screw it up,
me or anyone,

if somebody makes a mess of it,
I’ll destroy his life.

Of all the plans all these people have,

yours...

is the best.

And I’m telling you another thing...

Do you like tequila?

It’s : am.

There’s a lesson early in the morning.

Plastic expl*sive.

Sorry.

It’d be great if you were
rested for the class.

-We couldn’t sleep.
-Go to bed.

-The three of us together?
-Each of us to their bed.

The pyjamas look
really good on you, Professor.

Now.

Now.

And you... And you with the lights.

That guy really turns me on,
he really turns me on.

-He really turns me on!
-Really? I can’t tell at all.

Can you notice?

-A lot.
-Let him notice.

What a racket, man!

Jesus...

Mónica. Hey... Hey.

-What are you doing here? Are you crazy?
-I wasn’t feeling very well.

I think it’s the medicine, it got me sick.

The medicine.

That will be it, the medicine.
Yes, child. That’ll be it.

Oh my, you’re boiling like a kettle.

She must get the hell out of here.

-I’ll help you.
-Wait, wait.

Could you leave me alone

-for a while?
-Yes.

Please.

What do you think?

She’s not feeling very well.
She looks bad.

If we don’t take that b*llet out b*llet,
she’s f*cked.

Dad, calm down, all right?

She’ll be fine.

Why did you f*cking sh**t her?

Because Berlin was going to k*ll her.
I had no other choice.

Son of a bitch.

If he wants to k*ll somebody,
he should pull the trigger, not you.

We came for a robbery.

Not to k*ll people. Or to save lives.

We’re f*cking wretches, jeez.

-Of all the people...
-Dad, calm down.

Calm down.

Mónica, have you finished yet?

Yes.

-Let’s go.
-Raquel, wait a second.

I want to talk to you.

I want to infiltrate the medical team.

No. Somebody’s getting in, but not you.

Sure. There’s always
someone better than me for everything.

Raquel, I’m a firearms expert.

I can get there and, at a glance,
know how many they have,

what type and if they’re fake or not.

We can know who the robbers are.

You’re right.

You’ll come with me and cover the doctors.

Now I’ll tell you what we’re doing.

I heard a sh*t before.

The police. They sh*t a hostage.

-A hostage?
-Yes.

Who?

Who?

Who did the police sh**t?

The manager of the factory.

Arturo?

Did the police k*ll Arturo?

No. They didn’t k*ll him.

-Is he okay?
-Yes.

Is he alive?

-Is Arturo okay?
-He’s fine. Yes.

-Are you sure?
-Sure.

-Is he okay?
-A surgeon is coming in.

With his team.

He’ll have surgery and will be saved.

-Is he having surgery?
-Yes.

You must tell him I’m alive.

You must tell Arturo.

-Do you hear me?
-Nobody is telling anything.

Because you’ll be fine
and he will as well, okay?

Come on. Let’s have a look at the wound.

Calm down.

He is going to blame himself.
I took the phone because he told me to.

And that now I’m dead because of him.

You must tell him I’m alive, okay?

And his son too.

Are you pregnant?

Very well.

Congratulations.

-Give me a pen, please.
-Okay.

When?

Thanks.

Ángel!

I’ve decided to get our officers
inside the building.

I’ll do it by taking advantage
of the medical intervention.

I celebrate these decisions you make
during ambulance rides.

But my presence here responds
only to the government’s wish

that there isn’t a violent outcome.

Wow!

The CNI officer
has suddenly become a pacifist.

Weren’t you the one
who wanted to get the tanks in there?

I wanted to catch them by surprise.
Finish with this soon.

But now the priority is zero victims.

So I advise to negotiate and wait.

It must suck a lot being here all day

believing you’re the best,
not having to make any decisions, right?

Like being in a hostage crisis talk show.

Inspector, I’m not going to bite

because I understand at a certain age
hormones take over inside.

-I know it because of my mother.
-Where are you going?

As you’ll understand,
I have to inform about all this.

Of course.

So far the kidnappers
have always been ahead of us.

Everything was planned. Except this sh*t.

It’s the first thing
not according to plan.

And we must take advantage.

The only way to get in
without being detected by their cameras

is to advance
along this tube in the subsoil

that leads straight to the basements.

It’s the ventilation nozzle.

It was added seven months ago
to release the heat from the presses.

It’s a work in progress.

-They probably won’t know it’s there.
-I need two of your men to get in there.

Officer García Lobo,
here, and I’ll go with him.

Fine. Deputy Inspector Rubio

"will go with the two surgeons
and will get in as a nurse."

: pm. Synchronize watches.

"At : pm
the medical team will come in.

According to the head of internal medicine

the surgery
won’t take more than minutes."

But they can go on exactly until : pm.

When the doctors go out,

there’ll be a big number
of kidnappers to watch them.

That’s when Suárez and Lobo
will get in through the subsoil.

"They’ll get to the basement’s catch basin
dressed with red overalls and Dalí masks."

They’ll infiltrate among the hostages.

We’ll only be successful
if we do it like clockwork.

Inspector!

-Arturo Román’s wife is here.
-One moment, please.

Suárez, get moving.

Take care of the doctors. And be careful.

Get the operation ready!

What happened? Is my husband okay?

Your husband is conscious and stable.

He was sh*t by mistake.

-sh*t? What do you mean?
-He’s injured, but alive.

Calm down. Calm down.

The kidnappers allow us
to get in a surgical team

and he’ll have surgery immediately.

Sorry, but...
I wasn’t even listening, sorry.

Calm down.

Everything’s gonna be all right.

-Sit down, please.
-Thanks.

-Can you talk to him right now?
-Yes.

Take this.

Almansa, record it!

We must take that b*llet out right now.

You do it, dad.

You’re more cold-blooded.

Where’s the surgical kit
the Professor gave us?

-There’s a scalpel there.
-Berlin’s got it.

Jesus.

I don’t think it’s a good idea
to ask him for it.

The surgeons!
Go and steal their tools. Hurry.

-Okay.
-Wait! Wait!

Give him the note, please.

I’ll clean the wound now, okay?

Relax. You’re going to be fine.

-"Hello?"
-Professor, Arturo Román’s wife is here.

Okay.

Arturo.

Arturo!

What’s your wife’s name?

Laura.

What a beautiful name.
Well, you can talk to Laura.

Wives are good for moments like these.

They’re comforting.

Nobody remembers his wife
when you’re in front

of the disco, high as a kite, but...

If you have a problem, an accident
or... you’re simply scared,...

things change.

Are you thinking
about your secretary right now?

Huh? Yes?

No.

But who can think about lovers

with babies who could be aborted...

-or simply nothing?
-Spare me the speech, will you?

Listen to me.

If you say something weird,

I’ll give you the coup de grace

and your wife will hear it live.
Understand?

Inspector!

They’re turning on a phone.

We must tap that phone.

I want to see the selfie and main cameras.

There, there.

"Hello, darling."

Arturo, darling, how are you?

Fine, fine. I’m fine.

-"It was a clean sh*t."
-There’s no image.

No selfie or main cameras.
They’ve covered them.

"They’re letting some surgeons in."

I know.

Look, I’ve...

I’ve been thinking about you and...

And everything we did wrong.

Don’t think about it, darling. Not now.

"Not now."

Besides, it’s my fault.

I know we’re not fine.
We haven’t been fine for some time.

I’ve neglected you and our children.
I’ve been selfish.

I promise all that’s going to change,
you hear me?

"I promise that’s going to change.

For years you’ve been
saying you want to see

your sister in Australia."

Take the opportunity so the kids
can learn English.

And see kangaroos.

"That’s the first thing
we’ll do when we go out."

I owe you that.

I’ll do it for you.

Because I love you so much.

All these years wasted, chasing...

Thinking all that mattered
was money and the status and...

"But you’re the only important thing.

It’s always been you."

Since the day I met you.

I swear there are times when...

I try to remember that day...

"And I wonder
what the hell you saw in me, Mónica."

Laura.

You just think about getting out of there.

"Just think about that.

I love you."

I love you, honey.

Are you okay?

Calm down.

You’re really experienced, Arturo.

Your secretary... with the belly...

Laurita waiting for you
in the x with the children.

You, surrounded by money, are a legend.

Berlin!

The doctors are outside!

You must excuse me.

-Do they all know what they have to do?
-They do! Of course they do!

Are you ready?

Well, they’re ready.

Mercedes!

Are you ready?

-Yes, sir.
-I want her out of here.

Rio, take her to an office.

Nairobi.

Put on your masks!

And with me! Rock and roll!

Come in.

Leave everything on the floor.

Close the door.

Move forward.

Your hands on your head and legs apart.

We’re frisking you.

Get him out of here, please.

"Listen to me."

One of the nurses is an undercover cop.

-Which one?
-"The one with glasses.

You know what you have to do."

-Perfectly. Let’s get to it.
-Berlin!

It has to be a f*cking precision work.

I know.

People!

The one with glasses is the cop.

They’ll come in.

Maybe during an as*ault,
during an emergency...

It could be the Red Cross guy
or the pizza guy,

but it’s obvious they’ll try
to infiltrate someone.

And that will be our chance
to try and give them a Trojan horse.

Do you know what that is?

-I don’t know, but it rhymes easily.
-No!

-The Trojan horse...
-Was pretty hoarse!

Shut up and focus, Jesus!

Sorry.

I’m sorry.

The Greeks were at w*r with the Trojans.

One day the Trojans found
in front of their city

a wooden horse, a huge wooden horse!

And, out of vanity,

they thought it was a surrender present
by the Greeks.

So they opened the gates...

and they put it inside.

But they didn’t know that horse was hollow

and full of Greek warriors.

That night the Trojans lost the w*r.

And that’s exactly
what we are going to do.

When they try to get in

thinking they’re winning the battle...

Leave all your metallic objects
on that tray.

Glasses.

Watches.

If you have weapons,

microphones... I also advise you
to let them there.

We’re going to track
any type of radiofrequency.

Take off your shoes too. Please.

And now lie down.

On the ground.

Very well.

Like cockroaches.

Stand up.

Put on your shoes.

Take only the glasses.

You’re going to need them.

"Now yes... Welcome.
Take your things and come with me.

Thanks."
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