04x08 - Party Time

[bunniefuu]

[rock music plays]

That's hot.

[Ray] Morning, Greg.

No!

It isn't. You know why?

Because some freeloader
was blaring shitty Metallica all night.

Yeah, that was actually
Exodus's Bonded by Blood,

but it's not your fault
you don't know the genre.

You do know your sister doesn't want
you crashing here, right?

She only took pity on you

because you are
an unemployed man baby on probation.

I'm actually off probation now.

I'm showered and groomed.
I have somewhere important to be today.

Oh, well, that's good.
Congratulations. Good for you.

That means you can
take your perfect circle of a body

and roll your sloppy ass
out of our neighborhood.

Step it back a smidge.

You drive a Miata.
Think you're the King of Egypt?

I don't know about cars,
but I know that's not top of the line.

This is coming from a man

who has a squirrel obstacle course
in his backyard.

Do you have any friends, Raymond?

I believe it was Emerson who said
that "a friend is the hope of the heart."

Yeah. Well, it was Hughes who said,

"Get your g*dd*mn Frisbees off my roof
or I'm calling the police."

Hughes because
it's your last name? Clever.

Listen, those are Aerobies, Greg.
They're not Frisbees. Different disc.

I-I don't have time to talk about that
'cause my dojo needs me. So...

- Got to go. Sorry.
- That's right. I forgot, Raymond.

You like to hang with a bunch of kids
and play kung fu all day.

It is pathetic.

[dramatic music plays]

It's not kung fu.

It's Cobra Kai.

And it's not Raymond anymore.

My name is S...

Stingray. Yeah, I know.

And as much as you try
to clean your life up,

you still stink, Ray.

[chuckles] Stink-Ray!

[Greg laughs]

That is so much more appropriate!
Stink-Ray!

Tread carefully, Greg.

You mess with a Cobra,

you get the fangs.

[dramatic music plays]

[Greg laughs]

[grunting]

[panting]

Time for class.

Listen, John.

I just want you to know

I haven't forgotten what you did for me.

I wouldn't be here if not for you.

And I'll do anything to prove my loyalty.

Anything.

Let's go to work, Sensei.

[Kyler] Guys, the limo is coming at six.

So don't be late or else we're leaving.

'Cause my date and I, we on a mission.

[scoffs] Oh my God.
I bet she doesn't even exist.

- [Robby] Hey.
- [Tory] Hey.

You're, uh... You're gonna go?

To prom?

Yeah, right.
Let the rich kids have their stupid party.

- Can you picture me in a ballroom dress?
- [Kreese] All right, class. Fall in.

Today's lesson is about balance.

Not the way Miyagi-Do teaches it.

You're going to learn how
to get inside the heads of your opponents

and throw them off balance.

Pair up.

Ais!

You know, you should go.

Crashing you-know-who's big night would be
a way to get your opponents off balance.

- Not as much as if you showed up.
- I'm not a student. They won't let me in.

Maybe they would.

If you went with me.

Did you just ask me to prom?

Strictly a tactical move.

Well, it's such short notice.
We'd have to get a ride.

Still need a tux.

I think it's a great idea.

And if you're going,

you're going in style.

[Ray] Wassup! [laughs]

Remember that
from the old Bud commercials?

I guess you guys were too young for...
Probably weren't even born.

Eddie, what's going on, man? Hey, good
to see you. Dieter, how's your mom doing?

Wish she'd call.
You could've had a really cool stepdad.

Sensei!

Sir, I am reporting for duty
and I require no thanks.

Thanks for what?

Oh, uh, you know, just defending the dojo

and I-I served my time, Sensei sir.

Look, we're trying to train
for a tournament.

Let's carry on, everyone.

The All Valley tourney. I'm well aware.

Say, listen, I got a couple of good ideas.
Just basic strategy.

Don't be ridiculous.

You were never part of this team.
You're a buffoon.

A joker, an embarrassment.

You have no value here.

Wow, what?

But, Sensei, I'm, um,

one of the guys, you know.

You will never be Cobra Kai.

You get that?

Oh, wait, wait, w-wait, I got you.

Th-This is, um...

[chuckles] This is a test, right?

Yeah, this is a test.

Get the hell out of here.

Challenge accepted.

[Louie] Why are you cutting
the mozzarella? You're gonna dry it out.

- You're losing the juice!
- I'm making bruschetta.

Let the juice out
so the bread don't get soggy.

- [Louie] Let me get in there.
- I'll bite your fat fingers off!

- [Louie] But you disrespect...
- Louie's sister's more Louie than Louie.

I get nervous having family over

while we're dealing
with the Anthony crisis.

I know. Bullying is the last thing
I ever thought we'd be dealing with.

Yeah, well,

two more weeks in his room
with no screen time

and he'll get the message.

If he doesn't,
maybe we take him to a professional.

Whatever happens,
can we keep your mom out of this?

- I'm finally on stable ground with her.
- [Daniel] Okay.

[Lucille] These are dinner napkins.

I'm gonna swap 'em out
for something a little more appropriate.

Whatever you like, Lucille.
My house is your house.

[doorbell rings]

Hey, come on in.

- Make yourselves at home.
- Amanda. Welcome.

- Oh, hi. Rosa.
- Hi.

[Amanda] It's good to see you.

Oh, you look very dashing.

[tense music plays]

[Amanda] Okay, here she comes.

[romantic music plays]

Wow, you, uh, look so amazing.

So do you. [chuckles]

I guess, um...

Can't believe we finally
get a night to ourselves.

Yeah. No karate, no rivalries.

Just, uh, you and me.

Picture time. Let's go.

Diazes, get together.

You look so handsome.

He looks more and more like his father.

Mama.

So, uh, how you been, man?

- H-How's your weekend going?
- I'm fine.

You know, I don't hang out
with those biker guys anymore. So...

Uh, Johnny.

Come on.

[Vanessa] Okay.

Beautiful.
Let's get the LaRussos together. Anthony!

- Uh, no, he doesn't need to come down.
- Oh.

Thought I was supposed to stay in my room?

Who told you to stay in your room?
He's grounded? What happened?

Ma, we'll talk about it later, okay?

[Vanessa] Okay.

All right. Everybody now.
One big happy family. Let's go.

- Find your spot.
- Even Louie can get in the picture.

[Vanessa] Okay. Alrighty.

One, two, three.

Well, looks like it's just us tonight.
What should we do?

Uh, is that a trick question?

I meant for dinner. Not a trick.

Uh, ooh, maybe I'll make
un hornado de chancho.

[woman] Johnny.

Who's that?

Shannon, this is...

Carmen. His girlfriend.

Hi. I'm... Robby's mom.

Can we talk?

It's nice to meet you.

- [Johnny] What's going on?
- Don't you have a phone?

Yeah, inside.

[Shannon] All right, look, this rich guy,

Silver,

he came by my apartment today
and he gave Robby a car

to take to prom,

saying that him and his date
were gonna go first class all the way.

- Robby's going to prom?
- That's not the point.

He gave me this.

Said he wanted
to make sure Robby was taken care of.

Said he'd find me a new place to live.
Even offered me a job.

Doing what? I didn't ask.

But if there's one kind of person I know,

it's a rich guy who wants something.

Son of a bitch.

[Shannon] I tried to talk to Robby,
but this guy, he has his hooks in him.

Since this is Cobra Kai or whatever,
you need to handle this.

[Johnny] Don't worry.

[tense music plays]

I will.

[pop music plays]

♪ We're breaking all the ♪

♪ Rules again ♪

♪ Space dancing on the... ♪

[cheering]

♪ Moon again ♪

♪ She moves like a ballerina... ♪

Woo!

♪ Got me spinning ♪

♪ It's been a while since I've seen her ♪

♪ I wish I didn't... ♪

Dude, this sucks.

Prom without a date is like
Halloween with no candy. There's no point.

I mean, at least we're not the only ones
in for a boring night.

I heard Logan Wang's
after-party got canceled.

His brother got
in some middle school fight.

That supposed to make us feel better?
That everyone else's night is ruined?

Yeah. It's literally the definition
of "misery loves company."

[Yasmine] Demetri.

Oh, my...

Jessica Rabbit!

W-What are you doing here?

I just flew in.

- W-What about your dad's wedding?
- Oh, I'll get back in time.

You're more important. [chuckles]

I even flew economy plus,
which is total sh*t.

The seats don't even lie flat.

Wow.

You really do like me, huh?

Oh, you have no idea.

Mm. Come on, let's go dance.

Yes, my queen.

I-I gotta, you know.

Woo!

Let's go!

- [gasps] Hi.
- Hi!

I can't believe you're here!

♪ ...we're sinking ♪

♪ In a hole again ♪

♪ So what I'm drinking ♪

♪ I'm controlling it ♪

High heels?

No, no. It's the flying tornado kick
Johnny had me practicing.

Don't understand how I'm gonna use it.

I thought we said no karate talk?

Right, right.

Tonight is just about us.

Cheers.

[pop music plays]

♪ Dark and light ♪

♪ I'm tired of grays
So let's all pick a side ♪

♪ Pick a side ♪

♪ Dark and light... ♪

Oh my God.

♪ ...ignite ♪

♪ You can't stop the... ♪

[Daniel] I said no, all right?

I'm telling you, cuz, she's really good.

She's in her second year
of grad school for child psychology.

- [Amanda] Who is?
- Uh, Cousin Vanessa.

- She wants to help out with Anthony.
- [Amanda laughs]

Oh, no offense,
but if we were gonna get a pro,

we could do better
than Marisa Tomei Junior.

I am offended.
I'm gonna make you eat those words.

- Hey, Ness! Nessa! Come here!
- [Daniel] Louie.

Hey, sis, tell them
what you told me about Ant.

I mean I can't say for sure
what his deal is.

- That's fine.
- That's too bad.

My educated guess would be

environmentally-induced
Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder,

possibly related to a screen dependency,
or full-blown IGD.

I'd want to look
at the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual.

It's an evolving science.

Uh, okay. Uh, well...

Have at him. He's... upstairs.
Second door on the left.

Oh, that's not how this works.
I don't wanna talk to him.

I wanna talk to you.

[Daniel scoffs]

[metal clanking]

You think changing the lock's
gonna stop me?

Come out, you sons of b*tches!

[telephone ringing]

[metal clangs on floor]

[telephone continues ringing]

Hello?

[Silver] Mr. Lawrence.
Breaking and entering, are we?

I don't know what your deal is,

but you keep your cars
and your cash away from my son.

[Silver] Prom is a special night.

Did you even know he was going?

Look, as long as Robby's with me,
I'm gonna take care of him.

Oh, and I gotta say, Shannon?

She is a special lady,

and deserves so much better.

Listen to me, you ancient piece of sh*t.

Whatever you and Kreese are up to,
I'll kick both asses to the nursing home.

[chuckles]

I would love to see you try.

Corner of Magnolia and Lankershim.
You know it well.

Hey, what are you up to?

[smooth jazz music plays]

They're watching us.

[pop music plays]

Let's put on a show then.

Miguel.

What? Um, sorry.

So it's fair to say
you didn't consider the ramifications

of giving him his own electronics.

Would you say that
because of your demanding work schedules,

and now the dojo,

that Anthony may
have learned key life lessons

from the Internet rather than from you?

Um, I wouldn't go that far.

I wouldn't... I mean... Um, no, I'm...

Well, listen, I'm sure he's picked up
some things we didn't realize, but... no.

[Amanda clears throat]

Mm-hm. And when he picked up
these "things," as you call them,

were you able to correct the behavior?

Uh, look, we discipline
when it's appropriate.

Yes. Always. I mean, too much even.

- Hm.
- But not too, too much. Just...

- Like a...
- Hm.

Okay, I'm sorry,

how many stones do you plan
on throwing from your glass house?

I'm curious if you've ever taken care
of anything bigger than a goldfish.

What are you writing?

See, this reaction
is at the root of the problem.

Excuse...

You're acting out.

No, no, we're just working through this.
We're not acting out.

I can prove it with a simple test.

Now, why do you think
you love your daughter more than your son?

Wha... [scoffs]

- Wha...
- [Vanessa] Mm-hm.

What? Give me that pad!

You failed.

Sorry. Nope.

[Silver] It's been a long time
since this place has been a dojo.

[Kreese] They're putting it up for sale.

I think it was a candle shop.

[shouting]

[both laugh]

This place was always good to us.

And it will be again.

After we win the All Valley.

Going back to our roots.

Right here. When it was just you and me.

And I've got my agent looking
for other locations for when we expand.

- Expand?
- [Silver] That's right.

I'm making our dream a reality.

We're just one tournament victory away.

Well, Terry, I can tell you,
as far as surprises go,

this is a good one.

This is not your only surprise.

Tournament's coming up in a week.

I'm with Eagle Fang Karate.
You may have heard of it.

It's pretty badass.

Bert. Hey, Bert. Psst. Bert.

- I'll be right back.
- Mm-hm.

Bert!

- What are you doing here?
- Sorry, you scared me.

I need your help, man.
I'm trying to rejoin Cobra Kai.

I'm not in Cobra Kai anymore.

What?

I gotta get back.
The slow dance is when I make my move.

Wait, I heard that you guys lost
your after-party pad. Is that true?

Yeah. So?

So Stingray's got a move for ya. My place.

Come to 7010 Halbert.

Tell everybody, okay?

[romantic music plays]

♪ Hope they guide me to the one... ♪

- You're a good dancer.
- [Robby] Thank you.

My, uh... My mom was a dancer.

That wasn't an option for me.
I had to teach myself.

You're still pretty good.

You'd win a karate competition
before a dance one.

I hope so.

I mean, all these Encino kids
have their whole lives cut out for them.

I'll never have that.

But if I could just win this one time,

I could look at that trophy
and know I was best at something.

That's stupid.

No, it's not.

I mean, I get it.

♪ 'Cause honestly I liked you more ♪

♪ And you knew it, yeah... ♪

Are they still watching?

I don't care.

♪ You knew it... ♪

Me neither.

- Sam.
- What?

[tires screeching]

[dramatic music plays]

[Johnny] You brought me to the old dojo?

Come on out.

[Johnny groans]

[ears ringing]

[echoing] That's what you get
for betraying your sensei.

You got him to come here?

I had to prove my loyalty.

You wanted to get back at him, right?
Well, here's your chance.

What about focusing on the tournament?

I am focused.

The only way that loser has a sh*t
at winning the tournament

is with the Diaz kid, right?

How's that kid's confidence gonna be
when he sees his sensei beaten to a pulp?

It'll totally throw him off balance.
Just like your lesson.

Unlike him,
I actually heed your lessons, Captain.

- [Johnny] Hi-yah!
- [Silver grunts]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[dramatic music continues]

[grunting]

[grunting]

Woo-hoo!

You see this? Looks like
LaRusso taught him some defense.

Okay, pretty boy.

Let's go.

Let's see what you learned.

[dramatic music intensifies]

[grunting]

Guess you didn't learn much, huh?

You wanna see some more?

Let him go.

Now.

We agreed to settle this
at the tournament.

And that's where we're gonna do it.

What happened to "no mercy"?

You know, I thought
you knew better than to question me.

I thought this is what you wanted.

[tense music plays]

[Silver sighs]

[Johnny groans]

[pop music plays]

Party time!

- Ready for a refill?
- Yeah.

Come on.

I guess Moon's not coming.

I'm sorry. Did you say something?

[Yasmine] Come on,
let's check out the rest of the house.

- [Demetri] I'll race ya!
- [Yasmine giggles]

No more hard stuff for me.
I learned my lesson.

- I'm just gonna grab a beer.
- Okay. Grab me one too. I'll find snacks.

[music on the stereo fades]

Whoa! The day the music d*ed.
What's going on? Guys, turn it back on.

There are families on this street
trying to get some sleep.

If y'all don't go home right now,

you are gonna get arrested
for underage drinking.

Okay, relax. Hey, guys!

Hey, hey! You don't have to leave!
It's fine. He's my neighbor. Hey.

What are you doing here?
You weren't invited.

You should leave right now.

Okay, no one listen
to this speed bump of a human.

This is a loser, everyone.

That's why he's partying with you,
because he has no friends his own age.

Okay.

I warned you,

but you just had to push it
and make it personal.

I did, Stink-Ray.

And you know what I'm doing right now?

I'm gonna start pushing these buttons
and I am gonna call the cops. Ow!

It's not Stink-Ray.

[Greg groans]

Also, this is really gonna sting.

[Greg groans]

So's this.

[all] Oh!

[girl] Did you see that?

Party on.

- [cheering]
- [music playing]

[all] Stingray, Stingray,
Stingray, Stingray, Stingray!

Stingray, Stingray, Stingray,
Stingray, Stingray, Stingray, Stingray!

[Daniel sighs]

Hey.

Look, I know this suspension
and the no screens thing sucks.

But not as much as it sucks to be bullied.

So I hope you understand
why these consequences are necessary.

We're trying to help you to grow
into the person we know you are, Anthony.

I know it's been crazy around here
this last little while and that part,

that's on me.

This tournament stuff made me lose focus
on the things that are most important.

Actually, I'm, uh...
I'm looking forward to the tournament.

You know, I hope you guys win.
Okay? Screw Cobra Kai.

[Daniel exhales]

Well,

on that we can agree.

[faint chime]

What is that?

[Daniel sighs]

We said no more screens.

Are you hearing
anything we're saying to you?

Give me that, Anthony.

It's not even an iPad.
It barely has games. This doesn't count!

- Dad, are you insane? Do you know...
- Quiet!

You're gonna learn to listen to us
and do as you're told, and if you don't,

you'd better strap yourself in
for a rough ride

because I am done playing games with you.

Do you understand me?

Yes.

You better.

[dramatic music crescendos]

[pop music plays]

Seems like
you're always behind me in line.

First Miguel, now Robby.

I have a half-eaten cupcake
if you want some.

You know, I'd kick your ass,
but I promised your mom that I wouldn't.

Stay the hell away from my family.

Sorry.

I don't take orders
from tiny, little b*tches.

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

- [Miguel] Sam, stop!
- [Samantha grunts]

What are you doing?

What Johnny said!
Not taking her sh*t anymore!

- No!
- [Tory] Get off of me!

[grunting]

- [Miguel] No!
- [Tory] Let me go!

- Get off her!
- [Miguel] Stop!

- [Robby grunts]
- You think I broke your heart?

You broke mine too!

[grunting]

[crowd] Oh!

[Samantha grunts and pants]

[dramatic music plays]

[grunting]

[grunting and panting]

[grunting]

You think my dad cares about you?

He's trying to feel better
for screwing up with me!

[grunting]

[Ray] Oh, we're jumping in the pool?

[Ray laughs]

This is the greatest night of my life!

Cannonball!

[upbeat music plays]

Wow, you managed to stay dry.
Can you help me out?

[Tory laughs]

- [Tory yells]
- [Robby laughs]

What was that?

Tonight was supposed to be
for you and me. You ruined it!

What? What? Why are you taking her side?
Same reason you've been staring at her?

Let's not talk about
the moment you had with Robby, huh?

I wanna go home.

Me too.

[knocking on door]

[Miguel] Sensei, you got a second to talk?
I've been having a real rough night.

You around?

- [Johnny groans]
- Oh sh*t.

Not again.

Sensei!

Oh, come inside, come inside.

[sighs] Okay.

- What happened? Why'd you drink so much?
- Old man can kick.

[Miguel] I don't know what that means.
Let's get you up. Come on.

[Johnny groans]

[Johnny singing '80s pop song]

Oh.

- [Johnny groans]
- [Miguel] Put your legs up. There you go.

Okay.

Okay.

Hey, hey, hey! No, no, no!

- Oh, I'm sorry.
- You're fine. I was already wet.

- Me too.
- [Miguel] Okay.

From pee. [chuckles]

[Miguel chuckles]

[Miguel] Gross.

Okay. Look, um, you're good here.

I'm going to bed.
We can talk in the morning.

Wait, wait, listen, listen.

[Johnny sighs]

I want... I wanna be a father to you.

I really do.

I try to protect you.

I try to be there for you.
I just suck at it. I really suck at it.

But I want to so bad.

You're doing just fine.

I love you.

[sniffs] I love you too, Robby. [cries]

[cries]

[somber music plays]

[laughter]

That hook kick was awesome.
Did you throw that blind?

I could throw that in my sleep.

[Robby laughs]

But I think the highlight of my night
was still your dance moves.

[chuckles] Thanks. It's a good thing
we practiced that twirl, it came in handy.

I can't believe
Sensei Silver let us borrow this car.

Yeah, I know.

Gotta return it tomorrow, though, so...

Same with this.

[laughs] Nice!

- [both laugh]
- [Tory] Hopefully, it's all dry by then.

♪ If you listen, just hear my heart
You'll feel... ♪

I guess we should get our money's worth.

♪ ...from the start ♪

♪ If you love me ♪

♪ Come closer and hear my heart ♪

- Hey, see Sam yet?
- No, she's still conked out in her room.

Hm.

- [clanging]
- [door opening]

[Amanda] Anthony?

What are you doing?

I was just, uh, taking out the trash.

You're just taking out the trash?

Without anybody asking?

For the first time in your whole life?

Listen, I, uh...

I screwed up, okay?

I did some dumb things to that kid
and it went way too far.

Okay? And...
And I really do feel bad about it.

I heard what you said, Dad,
and, you know, maybe I could help out,

you know, in the dealership
or hang out in the dojo again,

if-if that's cool?

Yeah, well, that's, um...

That would be cool.

Well, I don't know what kind
of Miyagi magic you pulled, but

it worked.

[dramatic music plays]

Questioning you?

Questioning you? No mercy. [chuckles]

Bullshit. I proved my loyalty.

[glass smashes]

Oh! Hey, hey, hey! Mr. Vice Sensei.

How goes it? Ooh, is that a Technogym?

I think Dwayne Johnson
has one of those in his bathroom.

Hey! What do you think you're doing?

Sensei Kreese was clear. Get the hell out.

I don't mean to be disrespectful,
but I think he's incorrect.

You ask any of the students here,
uh, what they think of Stingray,

and th-they want me on the team, sir.

So you wanna be Cobra Kai?

Yes, Sensei.

I've already proven myself to my peers,

but now I'm gonna
prove myself to you, sir.

How bad do you want it?

I want it more than anything else in
the world, sir. It's literally all I want.

It's all I think about.
I-I'll do anything, please.

[chuckles] You wanna be Cobra Kai?

Ooh. So you wanna be Cobra Kai, huh?

- [Silver grunts and laughs]
- [Ray groans]

[Silver laughs]

You wanna be Cobra Kai?

[dramatic classical music plays]

- You wanna be Cobra Kai?
- [Ray groans]

- [Silver grunts]
- [Ray groans]

You wanna be Cobra Kai? [grunts]

[Silver grunts]

[upbeat music plays]