Dinner is served in
the main dining room.
Where's Grandpa? He's
down in his laboratory.
Working on a secret project.
Secret project?
[sighs]
[door creaking]
Grandpa, chow time.
[static buzzing]
[laughs fiendishly]
Grandpa, chow time.
Start without me.
I'm inventing a machine that's
going to achieve world peace.
We're having broiled shark
and tossed centipede salad.
The world waited this long,
it can wait a little longer.
(Herman) Well, well, well...
if it isn't our favorite
mad scientist.
[laughs]
[laughs sarcastically]
Close the door.
[door shuts]
Okay, let's eat.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
What's the third sign?
I was hoping you'd ask.
Is that a hint?
No. It's an order.
As head of the
household it is my duty...
to see what my sneaky
old father-in-law is up to.
[door creaks]
[snickers]
Wowie, wowie.
Wowie zonk.
This place looks just like the
launching tower at Cape Kennedy.
[static buzzing]
[laughing]
[snoring]
[ringing]
Herman, you bum! Get
your hands off my machine!
[laughing]
[buzzing]
I don't know what I'm
doing, but I'm sure having fun.
Okay, Herman, knock it off.
All right. All right. All right.
I was just trying to...
Watch it. Don't stand up.
[buzzing]
Herman!
My darling Herman!
What happened?
Is he... No. He's just
slightly unconscious...
from being hit in the head
with a bolt of lightning.
Boy, was he lucky. Any place
else, it would have k*lled him.
[Herman groaning]
He's coming to.
I'll take the sheet.
No, Lily, don't touch him
until I prepare you emotionally.
What's wrong, Grandpa?
Did the lightning disfigure him?
Yes, my child,
I'm afraid it did.
Oh, my poor Herman,
my poor darling.
[groaning]
Now brace yourselves.
I'm gonna unveil him.
Now be brave.
Remember, my children, no
matter how gruesome he looks...
he's still our Herman.
[all gasp]
Oh, no!
Eddie...
We're gonna have to
break this to him gently.
Where am I?
You're right here, dear, in
the bosom of your family.
You got hit in the head
by a bolt of lightning.
I did? How?
How? By fooling around with
my machines, you big schnook.
(Lily) Grandpa!
It's all his own fault...
if schnooks rush in where
wise men fear to tread.
How do you feel? I feel fine.
I feel fine.
No harm done.
That's funny. My
clothes are too big for me.
I guess the heat of the
lightning expanded them.
[exhales]
What are you all staring at? Haven't
you ever seen big clothes before?
Why is everyone staring... Lily.
Yes, my beloved.
I demand to know why
everyone is staring at me.
Herman, I'm afraid to say
this but the explanation...
can be found in
the nearest mirror.
Nearest mirror?
(Herman) Mirror?
[screams]
Marilyn, get him
some water. Quickly.
[Herman gasping]
I've never seen that
man before in my life.
Neither have we.
This is a practical joke.
While I was unconscious
you put a mask on me.
No. Now, Herman. No, it's
not a mask. It's really you.
It's amazing. From one
lousy bolt of lightning.
Here, Uncle Herman,
drink this. Thank you.
I'm drinking, he's drinking.
It really is me.
Grandpa, throw the rest of this
water in my face, maybe it'll wash off.
Thank you. You're welcome.
He's still there, taunting me.
I'll never be able to do it.
You'll never be able to do what?
I will never be able to go through
the rest of my life with a face like this.
(Lily) Well, Grandpa,
what do you think?
(Grandpa) Not bad.
Not good, but not bad.
I think I look ridiculous.
Why?
I'm not used to dressing flashy.
I feel like I've...
gone Hollywood.
But, sweetheart...
I picked out the most
conservative outfit I could find.
(Lily) In keeping with
the dignity of your work.
Lily, dear, I have explained
to you half a dozen times...
I am not going to the
parlor with this face.
Oh.
You see, he figures they'll
take one look at that face...
and reach for the
embalming fluid.
Not necessarily. I figure
they'll be extremely polite...
and extremely cold.
The same as my family.
That's not fair, Herman,
we're not being cold.
We're just... You're just what?
We're just going through
a period of adjustment.
After all, Herman, I mean, we
have to look at you constantly.
You only have to look at
you when you're shaving.
(Eddie) Grandpa!
Hi, Mom. Hi, Grandpa.
Hello... sir.
Hello, sir?
He meant, "Hello, Pop."
Grandpa, will you come
outside and play catch with me?
Sure. Let's go. Okay.
(Herman) Wait a minute. Hold it.
Edward, why didn't you ask
your father to play catch with you?
'Cause my father isn't here.
(Eddie) I mean, he's...
He means he doesn't want
to mess up your new suit.
Yeah. Or your new face.
I see.
How considerate.
How coldly considerate.
Herman. What?
I've got it. We'll make an
appointment with Dr. Dudley...
to discuss the possibility
of plastic surgery.
Plastic surgery.
Plastic surgery!
Lily, what a wonderful
idea! I could kiss you.
As a matter of
fact, I think I will.
You don't want me
to. You don't want...
My own wife doesn't
want me to kiss her.
Oh, no, Herman, it's not that I
don't want you to. It's only that...
Only that I need more time.
Can you understand? Indubitably.
I can also understand that from now
on you prefer I sleep in the guest room.
Now, Herman, I...
I'm sorry that you feel so
strange with your own husband.
I just hope that someday
we can find a mutual friend...
who may introduce us!
Hermy.
[sobbing]
Hey, Marilyn. Yes, dear?
When Mom and Pop come
back from Dr. Dudley's...
will Pop have his
old face again?
You see, Eddie, now Dr. Dudley
is a general practitioner...
and if he advises
an operation...
then he'll refer your
father to a plastic surgeon.
Oh, gee.
Eddie, cheer up. His old
face wasn't that sensational.
Compared to his new
one, I think it was. So do I.
[laughing]
What's so funny?
The way Herman disguised
himself to appear in public...
so he wouldn't get stared at.
What's so funny about that?
I'll bet you 10 to 1 he
gets stared at anyhow.
Sit down.
That's fine.
Right there.
Now, tell me about the accident.
[muffled mumbling]
I didn't get any of that.
Doctor, he was hit on the
head by a bolt of lightning.
[snickering]
That's terrible.
Don't you think you could hear him
better if you took off the bandages?
Take off the...
I think so, too.
Come. Right this way.
Up and right over
to... That's fine.
All righty! Let's
hop on the old table.
Good.
Let's see what we have here.
You know, this roll of bandages
reminds me of my childhood.
I had a Siamese cat who
loved to play with a spool of yarn.
My mother gave the cat away, because
she thought that I was allergic to it.
But I wasn't. We found out later
that I was allergic to my mother.
Mr. M., I have no time for
games. Show me your face.
Not until you promise
not to laugh at it.
Come now. I never
laughed at it before.
From time to time it made
me sick but I never laughed.
Hermy, baby, please.
After all, he's our doctor.
Yes.
[grunts]
[gasps]
Do you mean that
this is the result...
of being hit by a
bolt of lightning?
That's fantastic!
Mr. Munster... Yes, Doctor.
It is my considered
expert medical opinion...
that that bolt of lightning
was your good fairy.
What do you mean?
I mean that this face
is a vast improvement.
So don't complain.
We were hoping to restore
his old one with plastic surgery.
[laughing]
You're kidding. No.
You really want the old
face back, on purpose?
Yes.
And that's why we brought this photograph
so you could tell us if it's possible.
[mumbles]
Mr. and Mrs. Munster, forget it.
No plastic surgeon in
the world would touch him.
Wear it in good health.
[exclaims]
He likes this face better.
And he calls himself a doctor.
Dear, there's no
accounting for taste.
Don't you worry, we'll
get another opinion.
Now, I'll go and fix you
some lunch. I'm not hungry.
Darn!
Nobody loves me. There.
[Grandpa shrieks]
(Grandpa) Lily! Marilyn! Eddie!
Herman!
Am I glad you're home. Why?
Why? Because your
troubles are over.
Look what I found
tucked away in my files.
What is it? Plans for a
condominium in Transylvania?
No. It's your
original blueprint.
The original? Correct.
The one they followed
when they put him together?
Right. Where did you get it?
"To our favorite Count Dracula.
"A souvenir from Dr. Frankenstein
and all the guys and gals."
Isn't that sweet?
Well, that's... Yeah,
that's fine but...
how does it solve my problem?
How does it solve your
problem? We follow it again.
We put your head back in the
original magnetic field and then...
you regain your original
face. What do you say?
I say absolutely not.
It's too dangerous.
I say absolutely yes.
No, Herman. If
something should happen...
Lily, dear, my mind is made up.
Grandpa, when do we start?
Herman, I'll be ready for
you in about five or six hours.
Oh, Mom, come on. Let
me go down and watch.
No, Eddie. It's safer and
smarter if we all wait here.
[static buzzing]
(Herman) Well?
How are we coming? Great!
Are you comfortable? No.
Does the blueprint say I'm
supposed to be comfortable?
(Grandpa) The blueprints
say a lot of things.
Maybe you should take a
little bit more time to study them.
What's the matter,
Herman, turning chicken?
Hardly.
Chicken. Chicken?
You aren't gonna...
Herman, please.
Here, sign this.
What's this? It's a
routine release form.
Okay, we're all ready.
Good luck. Thanks.
Same to you.
♪♪[humming]
[buzzing]
[laughs fiendishly]
[crackling]
[Grandpa laughing]
Goodbye, Herman.
[laughing]
It's just like
your first haircut.
[thundering]
[crackling stops]
Easy does it, Herman.
Hey, I hear footsteps.
They're coming up.
Well, was it a success?
Yes and no.
Isn't Dad having supper with us?
No, your father
has to go to work.
He's taken a job as
a cocktail waitress.
Eureka! Eureka what?
I may have found
where I slipped up.
Do you think she'll
be willing to try again?
Grandpa, don't even ask him.
Good evening. Good
evening, Aunt Herman.
Well, how do I look?
[wolf-whistling]
You look lovely.
Thank you.
Well, I'm off to
the cocktail lounge.
Goodnight to everyone...
except Grandpa.
Herman, be a sport. I
did restore your old face.
I'm greedy.
I want my old face
attached to my old body.
Goodnight, dear.
Goodnight, dear.
Don't let the
customers get fresh.
I won't.
[smacking]
Nuts!
I forgot to ask him what he plans
to do about next Monday at school.
What's next Monday
at school? Father's Day.
[laughing]
Just what I need,
right after I set my hair.
[thunder rumbling]
[thudding]
[laughing]
Lily! Lily! Lily! Lily!
I'm back!
I'm Herman Munster...
your handsome husband.
[laughing]