01x05 - Lady in Waiting

[bunniefuu]

You can pour Mr. Chadwick's
coffee now, Charles.

Yes, ma'am.

Good morning. Good
morning, Charles.

Ah, thank you.

Good morning, Beth.

Beth. You are sulking.

What?

You are sulking!

I'm not sulking.

Of course you are sulking.
And it isn't necessary.

We have had our usual argument
and now the matter is settled.

Is it?

Beth, now listen to me.
He isn't for you, believe me.

But if you insist upon seeing
him I have a right to...

...well, to express my feelings.

You have no right to
control my life.

Your life, in this case, is tied in
with an employee of the company.

What difference does that make?
He's an honest, hardworking...

Yes, he is. And he's ambitious,
he's intelligent...

...he's a good attorney, and he has a
flair for the advertising business.

And he's also smart enough to
know a golden opportunity...

...when he sees it.

You're not Father.

No, I'm not your Father.
I'm your brother.

And if your choice of men friends
were more mature, believe me...

I would stay out of your life.

You don't know how to
stay out of my life.

I won't let you be used, Beth.

Therefore I've taken
the appropriate steps.

Charles, car ready?

What do you mean you've
"taken the appropriate steps?"

Bryce, what have you done?

I've written a letter
to Peter Hamilton.

He'll receive it when he gets
back from Atlanta today.

What?

I told him that if he continues to
see you, contrary to my wishes...

...his employment with Ellison
Chadwick will be terminated.

I don't believe it. You mean
you threatened him with...

I won't be home for dinner.
Don't wait for me, Beth.

He won't care if you fire him.

No?

Well then let me ask you a
question, Beth.

If your name weren't Chadwick,
and you didn't have all of this...

...do you think that... I mean...
do you really think that...

...Peter Hamilton would
give you a second look?

Now...

I'm... I'm sorry if I sound cruel,
I don't mean to be.

But the sooner you face the facts,
the better.

And the cheaper it will be
for all of us.

What about the price I've paid?
First to father then to you.

Anything I wanted to do own my own,
you or he prevented!

Beth. This is hardly the time.

No, it never is.

Charles?

Yes, Miss Chadwick?

Tomorrow's your day off, isn't it?

Yes, ma'am.

Will you be leaving tonight
with the rest of the staff?

Well I'd planned to, Miss Chadwick.

But, if you'd like me to stay...

No, no. That won't be necessary.

As you wish. May I
bring you more coffee?

Thank you Charles, no. That'll
be all.

Hello?

Yes, operator. Speaking.

Darling! How are you?

I'm going in to wheel and deal
in a minute...

...and I thought I'd call you first
and say good morning.

Oh. You always surprise me.

Well, that's better than
being predictable, right?

How's Atlanta?

Oh, just fine, all of it.
Hey, I miss you.

I miss you too.
When will you be back?

Well, later tonight. I thought I'd
come right over from the airport.

Darling? Hello?

Darling, let's make it tomorrow.

I mean it'll be I ate,
you'll probably be tired.

Well... uh...

No, really. Tomorrow
will be much better.

Mr. Gaines will see you now.

All right, Beth. Gotta go. I'll call
you first thing in the morning.

You do love me, don't you?

No, I hate you with a passion.

Goodbye, darling.
Have a safe trip.

Beth?

Beth? You awake?

Yes. Who is it?

Would you open the front door?
I've lost my key.

I'm in bed already.
Come in this way.

Are they unlocked?

Yes.

Oh. Don't forget to
turn off the alarm.

All right.

It's off.

Beth, why didn't you
turn off the alarm?

I don't understand...

We found a key ring in
the bushes, Miss Chadwick.

Does it belong to your brother?

Yes... those are...
those were his keys.

The front light's b*rned out.

He must've dropped his keys and
couldn't find them in the dark.

Probably walked around to
your French doors and knocked.

I was asleep. I had taken sleeping
pills and I... I didn't hear him.

We figure he broke the glass
and opened the door.

I heard the glass and then
the alarm go off.

I just woke up and
reached for the g*n.

I thought it was a burglar.

Obviously a mistake, Miss Chadwick.
A terrible mistake.

I thought it was a burglar.

A terrible mistake... mistake...
mistake... mistake...

That does it.

Beth.

Bryce!

Y'now, the most ridiculous
thing happened.

I've lost my key to the front door.

How did you get in?

With this.

A spare?

Yes, I leave it in the flowerpot
by the front door.

Why didn't you answer?
I was ringing...

Beth! Beth! What is it?

I sh*t Bryce.

You what?

He came in my room
as the alarm went off.

Go and see.
I want to know if he's...

All right. All right.

Now you stay here. Stay right here.

Beth, he's dead.

6 Mary 102, 2 Mary 7 clear.

12 Mary 155, restaurant information
frequency 15 clear.

6 Mary 2 continuing, a male
45 years, 5'11, 190 pounds.

Mary 75 Roger. Now 17 clear.

You guys all finished?

Okay, that's it.

You catching up on
your reading, Lieutenant?

No, no, not really.

Well, I was half asleep because
I'd taken a sleeping pill.

And the burglar alarm was on?

Well, yes. There is a switch
beside my bed.

How does it work outside?

At the front door? Well, if you
have a key and use it, then it...

...automatically turns the alarm off.

Ah.

Do you have any idea why your
brother went through your...

...French doors, knowing he'd
probably set the alarm off?

I guess he lost his keys and he came
round the side of the house...

...and tried to get in my window.

What time did you go to bed
tonight, Miss Chadwick?

About nine thirty.

I didn't feel very well yesterday,
so I didn't go out.

Excuse me.

Did I hear you say you
stayed home today?

Yes, that's what I said.

You didn't go out at all?

No. No, that's what I said.

Thank you.

When you got there he
was already dead?

Yes, that's correct.

Did Miss Chadwick telephone you
after she sh*t her brother?

No. I was on my way over. I stopped
at the gate when I heard the sh*ts.

How many?

Three.

The alarm was going?

That's right.

Why did you drop by, Mr. Hamilton?

I came to see Bryce. I work for him.

Can you account for your
whereabouts this evening?

I came in from Atlanta, I landed at
ten o'clock...

...I took a cab from there, got into
my apartment about ten forty-five.

You can check with the doorman.
He can vouch for that.

Why did you turn around and come
over here after just getting home?

It's a little involved.
Miss Chadwick and I...

...have been seeing each other.
And Bryce objected.

So you came over here to kind of
have it out with him?

I suppose you could put it that way.

Is this your newspaper?

No.

We found these outside in the bushes.

Thanks. Excuse me.

Miss Chadwick, these
your brother's keys?

Yes. Where did you find them?

In the bushes, ma'am.

With that front light b*rned out
it's really tough to see.

Gentlemen, you have our statements.
If you don't mind, I think that...

No, I'd like to go through this just
once more, to make sure...

...I got things straight.

Gentlemen, please.

No, Peter. That's all right.

Go on.

Now, Miss Chadwick, you said you
went to bed at nine thirty, right?

And you took a sleeping pill
before you retired.

That's right.

Well, would you mind telling me
what happened after that?

Well, it was after eleven...

...and I heard the glass break and
the alarm go off, and I woke up.

You thought it was a burglar?

Yes. Yes, I thought
it was a burglar.

You see, it was pitch dark, and I
was half asleep because I'd taken...

...the sleeping pill, and I heard the
glass break and the alarm go off.

And so I reached for the g*n.
It was in the drawer beside my bed.

And then I just started sh**ting.

I didn't know what I was doing.

Gentlemen, I will be available for
questioning tomorrow.

Right now I'd like to see that
Miss Chadwick gets some rest.

All right fellas, wrap it up.

Thank you very much. Goodnight.

C'mon.

Excuse me.

Were you and your brother the
only ones that were living here?

Yes. Well, except for Charles
and the maid.

My mother moved to Palm Desert
after my father d*ed.

Who is Charles?

The butler.

I suppose he's off tonight?

Yes.

Great big place, isn't it?

Well, goodnight.

Easy, boy. Easy, fella. Easy!

Easy! Easy now! That's right.

No, no, no. Not Enrico, darling!

Be nice, darling. Be nice!

You there! Pay the cab
and bring my luggage.

Come on, dear.

Did she have any luggage?

Luggage?

Right here.

There's ten-fifty on that meter.

Gee, I've only got eleven dollars.

Well, go ahead. Keep it all.

You're a sport.

All right, easy, boy.

Now Enrico, come here,
come here, come here!

Now you stop that, do you hear?
I want you to behave yourself.

That's a tough little
monkey you got there.

Enrico is not a monkey.
He's a pedigreed silky.

Oh, I can see that, ma'am.
It's just a figure of speech.

Now you stay there.
Where is my daughter?

I don't know, ma'am.
She's probably asleep.

Well, where's Charles?

It's his day off.
Are you Mrs. Chadwick?

Yes. And you?

My name is Columbo, ma'am.
I'm a Lieutenant from the police.

Just a minute. Not so quickly.
I'd like to look that over.

Well, I must say, you
hardly look the role.

Well, you know how it is.

You... you brought my bags in?

Yes, ma'am. The cab fare was
ten dollars and fifty cents...

...and was a fifty cent tip,
so that's eleven dollars.

I'll see that you're
reimbursed, Lieutenant.

Now, tell me. What happened?
Where is she?

Here I am, Mother.

Do you feel better now?

No.

It was an accident.

I don't care what it was.
You k*lled my son.

Mother.

Oh, you were always so
impossible, always.

Blundering, making mistakes,
causing trouble wherever you were.

He looked after her all of her life.

He protected you and now
you've destroyed him.

Mother, you don't understand.
It wasn't my fault!

I don't want to hear about it.

I'm sorry Lieutenant. This must
be very embarrassing for you.

No, not really, no.

You see, I come from a very big
family, and at dinner time...

...it was like, well you know,
Madison Square Garden, and...

...we used to patch it up with coffee.

Is that a hint?

Well, I smelled it when I came in.
I sure could use some.

Mother?

I should think it would be obvious
I am in no mood for coffee.

Ma'am, would you like me to
take your bags upstairs?

No. No, thank you.
Beth can attend to them.

He was a special man, Lieutenant.
Very special.

He kept us all together.

I thought you lived in Palm Desert?

I mean spiritually.

When my husband d*ed I...

...I couldn't stay in
this house any longer.

Well, that's certainly
understandable.

Was that when your son
took over the business, ma'am?

Yes. And turned it into one of the
largest advertising agencies...

...on the West Coast.

Really? Marvelous.

He took over from my husband
in many ways...

...including dealing with Beth
and her problems.

Oh?

Her choice of men, when she had a
choice...

...has never been particularly mature.

Oh yeah. Like that Peter Hamilton?

Exactly. He's an
obvious fortune hunter.

Of course, she would have no way of
seeing through him, would she?

I'm afraid not. She's something
of a child, Lieutenant.

Her decisions are always vague
and emotional.

Bryce was far more perceptive.

He never married, did he?
Why was that?

What are you implying?

Oh, no offense, ma'am. No, he just
seems like a very distinctive man...

...and a unique man and I
was curious about him.

Well, he was. But he had far too
many responsibilities for marriage.

And I suppose he never met the right
woman.

Then there was the business.

I don't know what's going to happen
to the company now.

I certainly can't run it.

And I don't want to bring anyone
in from outside.

You won't have to.

And what does that mean?

It means that I'm an
officer of the company.

In name only.

That's because Bryce would
never let me participate.

Of course he wouldn't.

You aren't even capable of
running your own life.

I've never been allowed to
run my own life.

Lieutenant? Won't you sit down?

Thank you.

But things are different now, aren't
they?

There's a change in the status quo.

If you're seriously considering...

We're not alone, Mother. I suggest
we discuss this later.

All right Lieutenant. I've kept you
waiting long enough.

What can I do for you?

Oh, no, no. That's all right. No, I
only have one problem and that is...

Cream and sugar?

I... No, I take it black. Thank you.

I couldn't sleep last night.
There were a couple of points that...

...were bothering me so I thought I'd
come over here and clear 'em up.

What kind of points?

That newspaper.

Newspaper?

Uh, yes. The one that I noticed
on the table in the foyer.

Now correct me if I'm wrong, but
didn't I hear you say that you...

...were home all day yesterday?

That's right.

See that's what puzzles me. How
did that newspaper get there?

Haven't you ever heard of
home delivery?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I have a newspaper
delivered to my house every morning.

There's your answer.

No. No, that won't answer it. No.

No, the newspaper on the foyer
table, that was a late edition.

I mean, I even saw racetrack
results in it.

I'm afraid I don't quite follow you.

Well, if you were home all day
who brought home the newspaper?

Well, Bryce must have brought
it home.

Yes, but Bryce came in through your
room, he didn't come in through...

...the front door. I mean, he was
sh*t on that side of the house.

How did that newspaper get to
the other end of the house?

Lieutenant, you seem to be
cross-examining my daughter.

That's all right, Mother.

Bryce must have brought it in,
and in my confusion, I picked it up...

...put it on the foyer table
when I went to answer the door.

Yes, that would be an answer,
except for one thing.

You left your brother's attache case
out there.

Why wouldn't you bring them both
in at the same time?

I didn't see it.

You didn't see it. Gee. They
couldn't have been too far apart.

People are inconsistent when they
are in a state of shock, Lieutenant.

It's foolish of you to expect
rational behaviour...

...at a time like that.

Well I'm sure you're probably right
about this. Y'now, I only get...

...into it because I try to figure it
out in my mind, you understand that.

Well look, I'm sure both of you have
a great deal to talk about.

So I'm going to run along.
Thank you for the coffee, ma'am.

Bye bye.

Goodbye.

Uh, listen, about that
eleven dollars, ma'am, uh...

If you leave me your card,
I'll send you a check.

I'm all out of cards.

Here.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, Lieutenant.

Easy now, easy.

The jury's coming in now.

Have you, ladies and gentlemen,
concluded your deliberations?

Yes sir, we have.

Clerk?

Thank you.

What do you think?

What?

She's home free. You watch.

Jupiter and Venus are in
good aspect with Pluto.

I have before me the verdict of the
coroner's jury...

...in the matter of Bryce Chadwick,
deceased.

The jury finds that Bryce Chadwick,
aged 46 came to his death...

...July 21st at his residence, 2307
Lorraine Drive, death being caused

...by three.38 caliber b*llet
wounds in the upper chest.

The jury also finds, from the
evidence submitted...

...that the death of Bryce Chadwick
was an accident.

Thank you very much.

Good luck to you.

See?

Thank you jury members.
This inquest is now closed.

Nice to be believed, isn't it, huh?

Yes. I want to take
the whole jury out for dinner.

That is what is known as
bribery after the fact.

Oh, is it?

Anyway, it's all over.
Back to normal, huh?

Oh no. That's exactly
what I don't want.

What do you mean?

Well, I think it's time we
made a few changes...

...that I broke a few patterns.

As long as you don't break ours.
How about some lunch to celebrate?

Can I take a raincheck? I have
a few appointments.

You don't mind, do you, darling?

No, no. That's all right.

Oh, when you get back to the office...

...would you set up a meeting with the
heads of the departments?

What's the agenda?

Reorganization.

Uh, tomorrow at two.

Mother?

Morning, Mr. Hamilton.

Oh, Lieutenant.

You remember me?

Yes, I've got a very good memory.

I tell you, I envy you that. I got
to the point where I can't...

...remember my telephone number.

What can I do for you, Lieutenant?

Well, I couldn't help overhearing
that she turned you down for lunch.

You want to grab a bite with me?

You want to ask me some
questions, is that it?

Well, uh... listen. It's my treat.

All right.

Window down, please.

Oh. Right.

That's it.

I held the whipped cream on the
Mighty Malt, that's what you wanted?

Uh, right.

Okay, and they were out of onion
rings. You want a substitution?

No, that's all right. No,
that's fine.

All right. Don't forget to let me
know before you leave, I need to...

...take the tray. People are always
driving off with our trays.

Right. I'll remember.

Thank you.

You're welcome. Right.

Tell me something.

You and Mrs. Chadwick, are you
going to be married?

You don't believe in
preliminaries, do you?

Well y'now sometimes, you just...

Yes, were going to be married but
we haven't set the date yet.

Mainly because of Bryce.

Oh, I see. Y'now what I
was wondering was...

...the night of the sh**ting, why
did you drive over there so late?

Let's say the propulsion was anger.

Huh? What do you mean?

Oh, I got back from a business trip
and there was a letter waiting...

...for me from Bryce, said to
lay off Beth, or else.

Or else? Or else what?

Oh well, it's professional
discrimination, things like that.

So I got hot and I went over
to have it out with him.

Boy, you got there just in time
for the commotion.

It's quite a coincidence, isn't it?

That's a leading question,
Lieutenant.

Do you think that the two of us
did Bryce in together?

What do you mean? m*rder? No,
I mean you were at the inquest.

They said it was a accident.

Well, I'm not talking about
the inquest, I'm talking about you.

What do you think?

Do I think it was a conspiracy? No,
oh, no. No chance of that. No sir.

It's rather odd that you're still
asking the same questions though.

Oh well, y'now, that's... well, that's
just me. I mean, nothing official.

It's just that I have this bug
about tying up loose ends.

Listen, I want to thank you.
You've been very helpful to me.

Suppose you ask the question
that you haven't asked.

Whether or not I'm a fortune hunter.

Well, I never intended...

I'm not. I love Beth, with her
money, or without her money.

As a matter of fact I was quite
prepared to quit the company.

Of course that won't be
necessary now.

No, it won't. But I won't be a
hypocrite, Lieutenant.

I'm sorry about poor Bryce being
k*lled, but...

...it has gotten Beth out
from under his thumb.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, way out, huh?

What's that supposed to mean?

Way out? Well, y'now in the
courtroom I overheard her say that...

...she was breaking patterns. Now,
this is a terrible thing to admit,

...but I think that, in a way, her
brother's death is...

...the best thing that ever happened
to her.

Hey, mister! You forgot the tray!

Sorry.

It's all right.

May I assist you, sir?

Oh. You scared me. No, I was
looking for Miss...

You're Charles, aren't you?

Are we acquainted?

Oh, I saw you at the inquest. No,
I'm Lieutenant Columbo.

I'm looking for Miss. Chadwick.

You're a police officer, sir.

Yes, I am. Yeah. Uh, is she in?

I'm afraid not, sir.

Oh, she isn't. I see. Well, do you...

Do you know where I can
get in touch with her?

Yes, she's at the beauty parlor.
Eugene's.

Uh huh.

Will that be all, sir?

Yes, Charles. Yeah, I think so.

Hey, this smells new.

It is, sir.

Oh. Why didn't she take it with her?

It was just delivered.

Oh, it was just delivered! I see.

Well, I want to tell you, it's a
beauty.

That's a wonderful piece of
machinery.

Will that be all, sir?

Yeah, Charles. That'll be all.

I don't want you to worry about me,
Charles. I'm going to go around...

...the side of the house here and
I'm going to conduct an experiment.

Is it something I can
help you with, sir?

No, Charles, it's a kind of do it
yourself thing.

Thank you very much.

May I help you, sir?

Uh, well, I'm not a customer.

No, I assumed that. You're
looking for someone?

Yes, I was looking for a
Beth Chadwick. Miss Chadwick?

My name is Lieutenant Columbo.

The police?

Well, look now, it's not serious.

I just want to talk to her
for a moment.

Well right through that door,
Lieutenant. Cubicle four.

Thank you.

Ah, Lieutenant.

Your cigar?

What about it?

Uh, well, the fragrance is not uh...
compatible.

Oh. See that's a shame. I just
lit it.

Oh.

What brings you here, Lieutenant?

Well, I stopped by the house.
I talked to Charles.

He told me where you'd be so I
thought I'd come by.

There's just one point that I
wanted to clear up.

Do you mind?

Does it matter? I'm a
c*ptive audience.

We can go, Miss.

No, no, no, that's all right. Go
ahead and finish.

I saw your new car, by the way.
Oh, that's some automobile.

Thank you.

Really beautiful. Beautiful.

I suppose you have to order those
things weeks in advance, don't you?

Yes, that's right.

Yeah, that's right. Boy. Real
change of pace for you, isn't it?

Well, I felt like something racy, as
they say in advertising. A new image.

Yeah. Well y'now, I can understand
that... I'm sorry...

...because it's a natural thing I
think, after a death in the family...

...to want to break loose.

That's one way of putting it.

Gee, that's funny though.

What?

If you had to order the car some
time ago...

...that would mean you knew in advance
you were going to change your style.

Finished, Miss Chadwick.

May I see?

Yes.

Oh.

- Looks fabulous.
- Just amazing.

Miss Chadwick, you look sensational.

You really think so?

I'd say you were a new woman.

Oh, thank you, Lieutenant.

Goodbye Jean, thank you.
See you next week. Bye Felicia.

Excuse me. Sorry.

Why Miss Chadwick, you look lovely.

Thank you. You're very kind.

The bill, and could I have an
appointment next week.

Certainly.

Well, Lieutenant, you haven't asked
me your question.

I'll tell you what. Are you
headed home?

Yes.

Do you mind if I meet you there?

Because it kind of has to do with
your house.

Is this really necessary?

Well, in a way, it is, yes. I
promise it won't take long.

All right. I'll meet you there.

Lieutenant? Your cigar.

Oh, Good afternoon, ma'am.

Good afternoon.

Oh, Charles, our Lieutenant
requires a stepladder.

Would you be good enough to get
one for him?

Yes, ma'am. Another
experiment, sir?

Uh, well, I guess you could call it
that, yeah.

Experiment, Lieutenant?

Uh huh. Like I said, I was out here
earlier.

Hey, why don't I show it to you?

Now, you figured that your brother
had to walk around...

...the side of the house like this.
Is that right?

I figure it. And so did the
coroner's jury.

Right. Now you see you had to walk
on grass.

Is there some point to this?

Yes, ma'am, there is.

You see, now this grass is kind of
dry because the sun's been out.

Uh, well, today's Thursday.

And the gardener cuts the grass on
Thursday. Excuse me a minute.

You see? Grass.

Yes. Well, that's only natural.

It certainly is. But you know there
was no grass on your brother's shoe?

I'm afraid I don't quite understand.

Your brother was sh*t a week ago.
On Thursday. And I looked at the

...photographs of the body, I even had
them blown up...

...and for the life of me, I just
couldn't see any grass...

...on the soles of his shoe. And I
couldn't figure that out. Why?

It was freshly cut...

...and it was sticky because it was
at night and there was dew.

Y'now that's very good. He must've
had particles of grass on his shoes.

But they were probably brushed off
on the carpet.

And unfortunately the room's been
cleaned.

Yeah, I know.

Well, unless there's something else?

Just one more thing.

I guess Charles has the stepladder
by now, huh?

I would think.

Yeah.

The other morning when I was over
here, I noticed these potted plants.

How observant.

And they're very pretty, you know.

But I got to thinking, I says to
myself, y'now sometimes people they...

...keep a spare key outside, just in
case they forget their own key.

Uh, do you... do you see this?

What?

This imprint here.

Yes. What about it?

Well that's like a fossil or
something.

You see, a spare key must've been
hidden in there for a long time.

You see, that's been rained on and
everything.

There was a spare key.

Oh?

I put it there myself when the alarm
system was installed.

Bryce didn't know about it.

I also removed it from there myself
recently...

...because I had second thoughts.

What do you mean by second thoughts?

Well, if a burglar were in fact on
the premises, he might find the key...

...and then what good would the
alarm system be?

Good point.

Yes, hey yeah.

I was right, wasn't I? Because you
found it.

Yeah, I guess I did.

All right, Lieutenant.

I think you've finally overstayed
your welcome.

The official verdict is death by
accidental means...

...and that should satisfy you.

Look ma'am, I don't mean any
offense.

I'm just trying to tie up loose
ends.

You see, I'm compulsive that way,
it's just, well...

...that's what my wife says
about it, just...

Are you really?

No, I mean all I meant by that was
that, well you see, if there was...

...a key there, and if Bryce knew
about it, well, then of course...

...he would use the key to let himself
in through the front door.

But I told the truth the night it
happened.

And I told the truth at the inquest.

So whatever your little compulsions
may be...

I'm afraid I must insist you
leave me alone.

Oh, goodbye.

I'll take it all.

Well, is that it?

No, I haven't finished.

You're not bored, are you?

No, no... I'm having a wonderful time.

Is there something young and bright?

Why don't you try this one?

Oh, that's marvelous. I want to
try that on. Excuse us.

Don't forget to get my hat over by
the black bag...

...could you bring it with me?

Could you get the zipper? Peter!

Yes?

Everybody set for this afternoon's
meeting?

Uh, yes, but I was wondering, Beth.

Huh?

Uh, don't you think it's a little
premature?

Perhaps another week for things
to ease up.

No. It must be today.

All right. It's up to you.

Well? What do you think?

Interesting.

What does that mean?

It's wild. Uh, a little out of your
style though, isn't it?

No, I don't think it is.

Well, you asked.

It was a courtesy.

I'm perfectly capable of making
my own decisions.

Oh, what is that silver dress over
there on the rail?

This one! This matches it!

Uh, Beth?

Why don't you finish your wardrobe?
I'm going back to the office.

No, no, I want you to wait till I'm
ready to go?

Do you have trousers that go with
the red top?

Beth. I'm not sure what's gotten
into you, but I'm not sure I like it.

I'll see you. If you need me, I'll
be back at the office.

Did you want to try this on?

Yes. This one and that blue dress
over there, please.

Ladies and gentlemen...

...will you please take your seats.

Well now, we've all been through a
period of anxiety and indecision...

...since my brother's death...

...but in a corporate sense we must
maintain our continuity.

As you all well know, this
is a family owned firm.

Therefore, as of today, I am
assuming the presidency.

As my first order of business...

I would like to announce the
elevation of Mr. Peter Hamilton...

...to executive vice-president in
charge of accounts.

As to philosophy, my brother was a
traditionalist.

I want to break new ground.

Would you pass these along, please.

I want to streamline. We're going to
cut down marginal accounts...

...and we're going to start promoting
ourselves for a change.

It seems to me we've been selling
everything but our own product.

Beth, forgive me, but that
is our job.

Forgive me, but it's not. Our job
is to grow.

Now when was the last time this
agency took on a new account?

We have all we can handle.

Nonsense!

Now look, Beth, I don't want to be
difficult, but I... I...

Fred, I don't mean to interrupt you...

...but this is really not the time for
negative thinking.

Now, if you disagree with my
approach...

...you're perfectly free to sever
your relationship with the firm.

No, Beth, I feel I can accommodate
myself to your way of thinking.

Yes, I'm sure you can.

Any questions?

Very well. We'll adjourn.

Oh. One more thing. A happy and
personal note.

I'd like to announce my engagement
to Mr. Hamilton. Thank you.

Are those letters for me to sign?

Yeah, right.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

You must be out of your mind. What
qualifies you to run this company?

I had a very good teacher, my
brother.

I've been studying his reports for
years and asking questions.

Thank you. We'll finish later.

He may not have known it, but he was
grooming me.

Well, don't forget. I am the
majority stockholder.

I will not relinquish control.

Don't be naive, Mother.

Who else can take over and still
keep it in the family?

Besides, I'm prepared to go to
court if necessary.

And you know what that means,
publicity, interviews, scandal.

I can't believe you're talking to
me like this.

Are you prepared to take over the
company?

You're getting old, Mother, or
hadn't you noticed?

Come in.

Am I interrupting something?

What do you want, Lieutenant?

Well, I just thought that...

Why, hello there fella, how
you doin'?

I got a treat for you. I got a
little something for him.

Here you are.

Y'now I've been carrying these
things around with me all week.

Come here, boy. Come on. Take one
of these. Look at that. C'mon.

Oh, easy. Easy.

I think we have a personality
conflict.

Do you need me for anything,
Lieutenant? Come here.

Uh, no ma'am. No, I don't think so.

Then I'll be leaving.

Mother?

We'll go into this later.

As you wish.

I'll leave the two of you alone.

No, that's all right Peter.

The Lieutenant is going to be
very brief.

Well Columbo, what is it now?

We've talked about keys and grass
and newspapers. Oh, thank you.

Well you know how one thing leads to
another. Now when I was... thank you...

When I was over at your house there
the other day...

...and I was climbing up and down that
ladder...

...I tell you, I had a thought,
something else occurred to me...

...that's been keeping me awake
at night.

Oh. What might that be?

Well, I was wondering about that
b*rned out bulb...

...in front of your house.

And I went over there this morning
to take a look at it. And...

You brought it with you!

Oh yeah. I didn't think you'd mind.

No.

This is a hundred watt bulb.
Hundred watt?

Got a life 750-800 hours. Now, if
your house is anything like...

...my house then you'll burn the
outside light 8-10 hours a day.

So that means it would last two, two
and a half months. Is that right?

I'll concede to your knowledge.
I don't know.

Thank you very much.

Uh, now this is what I got to
thinking.

I hate to change bulbs outside my
house...

...because no matter how tight I get
that up in the lamp...

...you see, they attract a lot of dirt
and goop and they're full of

...dead bugs and I just don't even
like to go up there and touch them.

Would you get to the point?

Uh, why is that bulb dirt and dust
free?

That bulb is clean as a whistle.

Now I think that's kind of
strange, don't you?

Hanging there long enough
to burn out,

but not hanging there long enough
to get dirty.

We're a fastidious family.

If the bulb is clean it's because
servants cleaned it.

They cleaned a b*rned out bulb?

They work in the daytime. So how
would they know?

All right Lieutenant, I think
that'll be enough.

I beg your pardon?

I want you to listen to this very
carefully.

I don't ever want to see you again.

You'll be refused admittance to my
house and to this office.

I have a great deal of work to do...

...and I no longer can indulge
your suspicions.

If you think you have a case against
me, go to the District Attorney.

Is that clear?

Yes. That's very clear.

I'm warning you. No more questions.

I wasn't going to ask a
question, ma'am.

I just wanted to return your bulb.

What can we do about him?

Beth, take it easy. Calm down.

Oh, stop saying calm down. You're
a lawyer, do something!

I mean we can institute some kind of
proceedings against him.

There must be somebody in the city
government who can do something!

Calm down. Take it easy.

Well is that your professional
advice?

Beth. What in the world has gotten
into you?

We never argued like this before.

We're not arguing.

Something's wrong. What is it?

All right, there is.

Number one: this business of
arbitrarily promoting me.

To say the least it smacks of high
level nepotism. It's...

And I assume there's a number two.

Yes, there is.

You announced our engagement without
even letting me know.

I thought it would please you!

It did please me.

But don't you think you could've
consulted with me?

I was just as surprised to hear it
as everybody else.

Well, I did it for you.

I mean, we are going to
get married, aren't we?

That's not the point.

I would have liked to have
had a hand in the decision.

Now it's not like you to act
this way.

This is way out of character
for you.

Well, if I've changed...

...it's because I thought you'd
like a more exciting woman.

A change, yes, but a complete
metamorphosis?

I'm not sure Beth you're
the same person.

Maybe I'm not.

Maybe Bryce was right.

About what?

About your being the wrong kind
of man for me.

What's that, the third?

I get paid not to count.

Just keep 'em coming, that's all.

Well, I didn't think you people
were supposed to drink on duty.

Oh, Mr. Hamilton.

Drink? Oh no, that's coffee.
No, I don't drink.

No, it's been a very long day.

I can see it's been a long day
for you too.

Oh, it shows huh?

Y'now, it's quite a coincidence...

...you and I both meeting in the same
place like this.

Yes, it is, isn't it? Yeah.

What are you reading?

Oh this? This is a transcript of
the inquest.

Listen, congratulations. I
understand you're engaged.

Not necessarily.

Oh really? What happened?

Let's get back to this. See I want
to ask you something.

Lieutenant, why are you hounding
Beth?

Hounding? Who me? Oh no, I'm not
hounding anybody. Oh no. No.

No, what I'm trying to do is get
to the bottom of this thing.

Y'now Lieutenant, I like you. I
really do. But you are devious.

Devious?

Your job was finished with the
coroner's verdict.

But you're still hanging around.
You're still asking questions.

You even managed to bump
into me here.

Now, Lieutenant. You don't really
think that...

...Beth k*lled her brother in cold
blood now, do you?

Well, as a matter of fact, I do.

Mr. Hamilton, you asked me what I
thought. Now I'm going to tell you.

I think she set it up, I think it
was deliberate...

...and I think you can help me
prove it.

Now, excuse me. You're sure that
that's coffee you're drinking?

Because you're not making any sense.

I was there. And I know Beth didn't
k*ll anybody. It was an accident.

Can I tell you about my wife?

Y'now my wife, she's got a proverb
for every situation.

You know with her, a rolling stone
gathers no moss...

you gotta look before you leap...

I'm sure that your wife is a very
nice woman.

But what has that got
to do with the case?

To be honest, she solved it for me.

We were having an argument last
night, she says to me...

"You're putting the cart before the
horse", and I said, "Right."

In this case, the horse is before
the cart. And I had the answer.

And what was that?

In the transcript you weren't very
specific.

I know. I just read every word
of it.

But I think on the night of the
m*rder you said something.

If you can remember that, and you
tell me you got a terrific memory...

...then you'll know, you'll know for
sure whether or not Beth Chadwick...

m*rder*d her brother.

All right. And what do I remember?

Who is it? Who's there?

Who's there?

Hello operator? Get me the police.

Operator?

Oh operator, I'm sorry. Forget it.

Lieutenant Columbo?

Is that you?

Come on, Lieutenant.

Come in and have a drink.

Lieutenant Columbo?

This is the way your brother came in
that night, isn't it?

How did you get in?

Same way your brother did. With a
spare key.

One of my men located your locksmith.
He was very cooperative.

What do you expect to prove by this
bit of nonsense?

Oh, I don't want to prove
anything, ma'am.

I came to arrest you.

Arrest me?

Yes, ma'am.

For the m*rder of your brother.

Oh.

And I did have a reason for coming
in this way.

I wanted to see the look
on your face.

Well, I'll consider myself
under arrest.

And now I want to see the look on
your face when I call my lawyer.

You know what's ironic?

I knew it wasn't an accident the
first night.

I knew it as soon as I saw that
newspaper.

But I didn't have any proof.

I had to wait for the proof.

I had to wait for your fiance to
give it to me.

From Peter?

Yes, ma'am. Although I don't think
he meant to.

You see, according to your story,
you were asleep at night...

the alarm woke you up, you reached
for a g*n...

...and you sh*t what you thought
was a burglar.

Which is exactly what happened.

Couldn't be. Because Mr. Hamilton,
who was driving up outside...

...at the time, he heard both the
sh*ts and alarm.

Of course he did. What difference
does that make?

Oh, big difference.

He heard the sh*ts first, then the
alarm.

That's the cart before the horse.

I mean, how could the alarm wake you
if the sh*ts came first?

You see, what really happened was
your brother came walking in here...

...just the way I did tonight, you
sh*t him...

...and then you set the alarm a few
seconds later.

Peter is mistaken.

No. He's a very good lawyer and he
prides himself on his memory.

And he won't like it...

...but he'll testify against you in
court if he has to.

Along with the other holes in your
story, I think they'll convict you.

No, really, you don't
want to do that.

Policemen outside, what would be
the point?

Besides, you're too classy a woman.

Now would you get dressed, ma'am?

Take all the time you need.