02x25 - Operation: Steam Heat

[bunniefuu]

♪ Just sit right back, and you'll hear a tale ♪

♪ A tale of a fateful trip ♪

♪ That started from this tropic port ♪

♪ Aboard this tiny ship ♪

♪ The mate was a mighty sailin' man ♪

♪ The skipper brave and sure ♪

♪ Passengers set sail that day for a -hour tour ♪

♪ A -hour tour ♪

[Thunder]

♪ The weather started getting rough ♪

♪ The tiny ship was tossed ♪

♪ If not for the courage of the fearless crew ♪

♪ The minnow would be lost, the minnow would be lost ♪

♪ The ship's aground on the shore of this ♪

♪ Uncharted desert isle ♪

♪ With gilligan ♪

♪ The skipper, too ♪

♪ The millionaire ♪

♪ And his wife ♪

♪ The movie star ♪

♪ The professor and mary ann ♪

♪ Here on gilligan's isle ♪

Ginger: gilligan, where's the hot water?

Thurston: water boy, where are you hiding?

Mary ann: gilligan, I need hot water!

I'm coming, I'm coming.

Gilligan, gilligan, can't you hear everyone

Yelling for hot water?

I can hear them if I was in hawaii.

Very funny. Besides, what were you doing up in the jungle?

I got tired of going to the lagoon for water

And bringing it back to camp

And boiling it to make hot water.

Well, where else are you gonna get hot water?

Out of a hole in the ground?

How'd you know?

Well, I just figured that you...

How do I know what?

That I get hot water

Out of a hole in the ground.

Well, where is it, gilligan?

Oh, is it here?

It's around here someplace.

Well, I don't seem to be able to find it.

Is it over here?

Oh, I know, skipper.

[Hissing]

You found it!

Gilligan, look! Gilligan, look!

Hey, professor! Professor!

Boy, wait till the others hear about this.

What's going on?

Hot water! Ha ha ha ha!

Of course, that means there's underground thermal activity.

Well, I know what it means to you.

It means to me I don't have to boil any more water.

Oh, boy! Hot showers, a hot bath!

Of course, it could also mean an active volcano.

Professor: "volcanoes in the south pacific islands follow a pattern.

"There is a noticeable rise in the temperature of the earth's crust,

"Followed by a rumbling sound,

"A blinding flash of light,

"And then a severe earth tremor.

Total destruction can be expected when these things occur."

Professor! Hey, professor!

Hi, professor.

Oh, hi, gilligan.

Maybe you could help me solve a problem.

How do I get the hot water to camp

Without carrying it?

Well, that's very simple.

Just use some bamboo rods to make a pipeline.

Oh, thanks, professor.

Talking to you is like looking up the answers

In the back of a book.

You going someplace?

As a matter of fact, I'm going

To the other side of the island.

What for?

Oh, I just want to look around.

There's a very rare species of something

Over there I'd like to examine.

Well, why go all the way over there?

Maybe it'll come over here.

Well, that's what I'm afraid of.

I mean, I'd rather not wait until it gets here.

Mmm. Hey, what's this?

That's a thermometer.

How big is that thing you're gonna examine?

Could be enormous.

Well, how are you gonna get close enough to take its temperature?

I intend to approach it very cautiously.

Oh, well, you better take this.

What for?

Make it stick out its tongue to say "ahh."

Heh, oney.

[Grunt] twosies.

Wish I had a porter.

Thurston, after all, gilligan found the hot water.

Therefore he owns it.

Yes, my dear, I know he found it.

I know he owns it.

But I intend to merge his hot water company

With my cattle company.

Well, what will that give you?

Boiled beef.

Oh, lovey, my dear, I did make a funny!

Ah, my dear, this is just the thing. There you are.

[Gasps] thurston, that's money.

Don't you see, darling?

I intend to have gilligan

Pipe his hot water into this trunk,

And that way, we'll always be able to have a hot bath.

But thurston, what's more important than money...

Did you say a hot bath?

Exactly.

Faster, thurston, faster.

Dishwashing with running hot water.

You know what that means?

No more broken nails.

Oh, no more chapped hands.

As davy crockett said

When he sh*t the last indian,

"No more red skin."

Professor: there will be a noticeable rise

In the temperature of the earth's crust.

Gilligan, my boy, pipe that hot water

Immediately into the howell hut.

Now just a minute, mr. Howell,

Let's be fair about this.

Fair? Ooh, how vulgar.

Just tap the water right over there, gilligan.

Mary ann has the dishes ready and waiting.

Oh, gilligan, now, come on.

Little buddy, you know how happy

A hot shower makes me, and when I'm happy,

I don't yell at anybody, do i?

Just a minute, skipper, that's coercion.

And coercion is sneaky and underhanded,

To be used only by a howell.

We need the hot water for the dishes, gilligan.

Well, I say a shower is more important.

Pipe that water to the howell hut!

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

What if I told you everybody can get hot water.

What would you say to that?

Out of one small little hole in the ground?

Just leave everything to me.

Well, I don't know about that...

It isn't we don't trust you, gilligan.

You see, it's just that leaving you in charge of a construction job

Is like leaving a lit match in charge of dynamite.

Skipper, get ready for your hot shower.

Mr. Howell, get ready for your hot bath,

And ginger, tell mary ann the hot water is on the way.

Are you sure you know what you're doing, gilligan?

Uh-huh. This time, nobody's gonna be able to say,

"Gilligan, you did it again."

Ooh, I'm gonna... Hmm.

Everybody ready?

Mary ann: ready.

Skipper: all set, gilligan.

Thurston: let her pour.

The little tide should be coming in

Any minute now, little boat.

Hot water, here we come.

... ... ... Leaks.

Oh, could have been worse.

It could have been .

[Hissing]

.

.

Gilligan, my boy,

Did you, uh, happen to drop that?

These are $ bills.

S? Oh, uh, perhaps you dropped those?

These are $ , bills.

You should be more careful

About dropping money out of your pocket, my boy.

Yes, mr. Howell.

All I got in my pocket,

Let's see, is, um...

Marbles, cents, and my lucky charm.

A lucky charm?

According to the rest of that stuff,

You're on a losing streak.

This must belong to you, mr. Howell.

Well, perhaps it does,

But it could find its way into your pocket

If you would grant me just one small favor.

I'll do you a favor for nothing.

Nothing? Nothing.

Would you pipe that hot water into my hut

For my own private hot bath?

It wouldn't be fair.

Fair! Oh, there goes that word again!

Gilligan, I'll let you use my tub

Every other saturday night,

Including the sailboat.

Mr. Howell, the skipper wants to take a shower

And the girls need it for the dishes.

Well, they want it as much as this, hmm?

Beautiful sound, isn't it?

[Hums]

Hee hee hee. Smell it, my boy.

Here, taste it.

Uh, don't bite it.

I'm sorry, mr. Howell.

Unless I can figure out a way

To make everybody share it, nobody gets it.

Well, there goes the end

Of a beautiful friendship.

[Bubbling]

[Rumbling]

What was that?

J.p. Morgan turning over in his grave.

What are you doing?

I'm thinking.

What are you thinking about?

The hot water.

Can we help you think?

Oh, that won't help.

How about this?

That'll just mix me up.

Gilligan, honey.

Oh, gilligan, dear.

Skipper!

Professor: if the temperature of the earth's crust

Rises degrees,

A blinding flash of light could be expected.

Gilligan, the hugging and the kissing

Is just to show how much we love you.

Why, there's no one in the world

That I love as much as I love you.

Is that the truth?

If I'm not telling the truth,

May lightning strike.

[Boom]

Ahoy there, little buddy.

Hi, skipper. I'm sure glad it's you.

Well, and I'm glad it's you.

I mean, uh, that is, the fact that we're alone,

Now we can have a buddy to buddy talk,

Right, little buddy?

Right. And you won't try to trick me,

'Cause you're my best friend.

If you can't trust your best friend to play fair,

You can't trust anybody.

We... Well, exactly.

I mean, you can trust me.

Sure.

You see what I mean?

Care to take in my laundry when it's dry?

Skipper, you're going swimming in the lagoon?

Well, I guess I'll have to, gilligan,

Since I don't have a shower.

Oh.

Skipper, you want to take a nice, hot shower?

Yes!

Think warm.

Professor: the volcano will signal the eruption to come

By an earth tremor.

[Rumbling]

Then the entire area will shake violently within seconds.

[Rumbling]

[Clamoring]

Hey, quiet, quiet!

No hot bath, no hot water for your dishes,

And no hot shower. Some friends.

Sometimes I just wish the earth

Would just open up and swallow us up.

[Rumbling]

Uh, skipper, that never happened before.

Well, I hope it never happens again.

I know something else that never happened before...

It never snowed.

Oh, gilligan, it doesn't snow on a tropical island.

Yeah, look.

I wonder if we're on the christmas island.

I'm trying to make some snowballs, but it won't pack.

It isn't snow, gilligan.

It's volcanic ash.

There's an active volcano on the island.

You mean the kind that goes rumble, rumble, varoom?

Where hot lava comes boiling down?

And the island explodes?

And sinks into the ocean?

Ooh, sounds perfectly dreadful to me.

Looks even worse.

Hey, professor, great news. They've stopped.

Who has stopped, gilligan?

The spouts have stopped spouting.

And the volcano has stopped volcanoing.

Erupting. That, too.

Unfortunately, it simply means

That the gases are gathering force

And could explode at any moment.

Well, that's terrible.

However, there is a way to neutralize the volcano,

By countering its energy force

With an equal energy force.

Oh, that's terrible.

No, that's good.

Sounds terrible.

In layman's terms,

If I could explode a b*mb in a tunnel

Near the base of the volcano,

Its force would blow it out

The same way you'd blow out this candle.

[Blows]

Well, but, professor,

Where are you gonna get a b*mb that big?

From materials right here on the island.

As a matter of fact, I'm making a crude form of nitroglycerin

Powerful enough to blow off that entire mountaintop.

You're making nitroglycerin?

Why, yes. Sulfuric acid from the crystallized copper in the caves,

Glycerol from papaya seeds,

And potassium nitrate from the rocks at the lagoon.

You hear that? He's making nitroglycerin.

Any questions?

Yeah, I have a question.

Good, gilligan. What's your question?

What's nitroglycerin?

Gilligan, will you keep quiet?

Better still, gilligan,

Will you get me a piece of vine

That I can use as a fuse?

Oh, yeah.

Uh, about inches long.

Yeah.

Dry, but not brittle. Mm-hmm.

Uh, pliable, but not soft.

You can count on me.

And, skipper, I'll need a clock

I can use as a timing device.

We'll be back in no time, professor.

Good, since we have practically no time left.

Aaah! Let's go, gilligan!

Ah, that's too brittle.

I think that's too wet.

No, that's too dry.

You're not going to eat that stuff, are you?

Of course not. The professor's making a fuse

For a b*mb. He's gonna blow the volcano.

Well, that's not the way to blow up a volcano.

I was in a movie once,

And that's not what the natives did.

What did they do?

Well, they took the handsomest man in the tribe

And the most beautiful woman...

I bet you played the woman.

Oh, gilligan, sometimes you have

A keen, analytical mind.

Thanks.

Anyway, they made a big banquet for us,

And they put beautiful flowers in our hair

And lovely bells around our ankles,

And the drums roared

And the children cried.

And I thought you said

You weren't going to eat that stuff.

I always eat popcorn at the movies.

Needs butter.

We walked bravely up the mountain,

And right to the volcano,

And we threw ourselves into it.

Into the volcano?

You can get k*lled that way.

That was the whole point of it.

The volcano's appetite was appeased by the sacrifice,

And it never exploded.

Anyway, that's the way we did it in the movie.

Oh, I don't know.

You could save everybody else, but you could end up...

Ginger. Oh, no.

Ginger, help!

I got it from the howells, professor.

He sold it to me.

Are they at the lagoon?

Well, he is, but she can't make up her mind

Which diamond to wear for an expl*si*n.

Almost finished.

Oh, be careful, huh?

Yes, it's highly volatile.

The slightest move could set it off.

Oh, well, be real careful.

Where is gilligan? I need that fuse.

Well, I'll find him, professor.

One part nitric acid...

And parts glycerol.

You want something done, you've gotta do it yourself.

Professor, ginger's gonna throw herself in the volcano.

[Pants] huh? Oh.

Oh, boy.

Gilligan, where have you... Gilligan, stop!

I'm sorry, skipper,

But I ran all the way and I was thirsty.

But you don't understand.

You wouldn't like it anyway. It tastes awful.

Oh, I'll bet it did.

Professor: powerful enough to blow up the entire mountaintop.

Gilligan, I don't want you to get alarmed

Or get nervous, but you just drank the nitroglycerin.

I what?

Professor: the slightest move can set it off.

Gilligan, no! D-don't... Don't shake.

But I can't help it.

Skipper, my knees are knocking.

Stop it!

Gilligan, don't you realize that if you move,

Half the island will blow up.

I don't care about the island.

I'm worried about me.

But, gilligan, if the island blows up,

You'll be leading the way.

Skipper, do something.

All right, little buddy,

Let me take you outside

And find you a nice, quiet place to... Blow up.

Please move slowly.

Slowly, gilligan... Oop!

Dust, dust!

That's gonna make me sneeze.

Aaaah! Don't sneeze.

Aah, aah... Aah-choo!

Ooh.

Sit down. Easy, now. Easy, gilligan.

Skipper, you better go down to the lagoon.

Little buddy, I am sticking right here with you.

You better go because now it's my turn to...

Aah-choo!

Still here.

Gilligan, please, now sit quietly.

Don't move a muscle.

I'm going down and get the professor.

Better hurry.

Don't move a muscle, gilligan.

Now let's see, there's my cosmetic case,

And my jewel case and my pill case and...

Oh, uh, gilligan?

I can't move.

Oh, you poor boy. Where does it hurt?

Uhh! I don't feel a thing.

You don't feel a thing?

Mrs. Howell, I might blow up!

Oh, don't you dare get angry with me.

I mean blow up for real. I drank some...

Oh, that's why you don't feel a thing.

You've been dipping into mr. Howell's private stock.

Demon rum is your worst enemy.

No, I didn't drink rum, I drank nitroglycerin.

Oh, mixed drinks are even worse.

Gilligan, hurry up!

The volcano's about to explode.

So am i, and I can't move.

Oh, my gosh, that's terrible.

Quick, run down to the lagoon.

Why, I'm not gonna go without you...

Aaaah!

See if I can find out what's wrong.

I know what's wrong, I can't move.

Well, maybe it's a reflex thing.

Cross your legs.

I'm afraid to.

Oh, gilligan... Oh, mary ann.

Gilligan. Mary ann!

Now, when I hit you... Oh!

Maybe I should hit you harder.

No. If you hit me any harder,

You'll turn me into a jigsaw puzzle.

What?

You see, I drank this nitroglycerin.

Any minute, I could explode.

Explode?

Yeah. Boom!

Oh, gosh. I better go get the professor.

Uh, skipper went to get him, too.

Oh, oh, you just sit here,

And you try not to think about it.

Oh, because if you think about it,

You're liable to get all upset.

And if you get all upset,

You're liable to go to pieces.

Oh, I mean... Never mind.

Go get the professor. I have a terrible itch,

And if I scratch it... Oh, no! No, no, no!

Oh, don't scratch!

Come on, professor, hurry up, please!

Will you tell me what this is all about?

I drank the nitroglycerin that was in the coconut cup.

You what?

I tried to stop him, but it was too late, professor.

What did it taste like?

Mmm, needed a little salt.

It's too watery.

Well, it was water, gilligan.

I was using the water in that cup

To dilute the other ingredients.

Then I'm not gonna blow up?

Gilligan, I oughta blow you up personally.

Of all the stupid things that I've ever heard...

We haven't got time for a talk.

We've got to b*mb that volcano.

Gilligan, get down to the lagoon.

Tell the others to get down there, too.

Ginger, mary ann, the howells...

Ginger. Oh, my gosh, ginger.

She's gonna throw herself in the volcano.

Throw herself in the volcano?

She does it all the time. It's an old native custom.

You see, they get the handsomest man

And the most beautiful girl...

Ginger plays the part of the girl...

And they put flowers in their hair,

And bells on their toes, and the drums...

Gilligan, never mind that.

Get down to the lagoon! Yeah.

Skipper, we've got to get that clock in the b*mb.

According to my calculations,

We've only got a few minutes left.

Well, we'd better hurry! Ooh!

Ginger! Ginger! Hi.

Hi.

Oh, you didn't throw yourself in the volcano.

Of course not!

I've got something real important to tell you.

What? What?

Oh! The professor's gonna blow up the volcano.

Oh, my goodness! We better get back to the lagoon!

[Whispering] yeah, lagoon. Yeah.

Ginger?

Ginger!

Ohh!

Where are we?

I don't know, but that first step is a doozy.

One thing's for sure...

We can't get out the way we got in.

Thanks.

[Hissing]

This is not a good place.

You can let go of my hand now, gilligan.

You can let go of my hand now, gilligan.

Sorry.

Hey, there's tunnels.

Maybe they lead out of here.

I'll go this way, you go that way.

Yeah.

Don't be scared, ginger.

Don't be afraid, ginger.

Ginger, just be brave like me, ok?

Ok. Aaaaaah!

[Crash]

The tunnel goes around in a

Circle. Circle.

[Rumbling]

Oh, what's that?

It's the volcano.

Sounds like it's going to explode.

Yeah. I think this is the cave

Where the professor's gonna throw the b*mb.

Both: the b*mb?!

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

Professor, for goodness sakes...

I asked you to be careful, skipper.

Oh, I wish you'd given us more time.

Well, there's plenty of time.

The pit's right back there.

Eh.

Are you ready?

All right, professor.

Do you want to know what time it is?

Gilligan, that's not important.

It's to zero.

What?

I don't know. Here. See?

Gilligan, I think that's the b*mb the professor built.

Are you sure?

Take a closer look. That's it!

Oh, yes. Here, you take it.

No, you take it. No, you take it.

I thought I heard gilligan.

Oh, don't be silly. He went to the lagoon.

No, you take it. No, you saw it first.

Now it's to zero.

Professor, I'm sure that was gilligan.

Skipper, that b*mb is going to go off! Oh!

Get rid of it!

Bye, b*mb.

Aaah! Aaah! How'd that happen?

Well, get rid of it!

W-w-w-where? In the pit!

And this time, don't throw it, drop it!

Drop it!

Ooh! Skipper! Aaah! Aaah!

Skipper, what are you doing down here?

And why did you bring that thing?

Aaaah! The b*mb!

B-b-b... Don't just stand there, gilligan,

Do something with it. Aaah...

First one to drop it is out.

First one who drops it, we all get out the hard way.

Oh, where's the professor?

He's up top side.

All: professor!

Ginger: help! Grab the vine!

Oh, professor! Professor, help!

Come on, ginger, get going.

[Groans] up, up.

Oh, oh.

Get the vine!

All right, gilligan, you're next.

No, skipper, you go first.

Don't argue, gilligan.

The skipper always goes up with his volcano.

No, skipper, you go first. I insist.

Gilligan, you are going up there now!

Besides, it'll take the of you to get me out of here.

Now come on, up!

All right, pull!

[Grunts] move... It... Gi...

Pull, pull!

Unh! Unh! Unh! Unh!

All right, skipper.

Hold on!

[Groans]

[Ticking]

All right, pull!

[All grunt]

Let's get out of here!

Gilligan!

What? That!

Get it off of him! Get it off!

Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!

Come on!

[Boom]

[Coughs]

Did anybody else get k*lled besides me?

Gilligan, you're very much alive.

We all are.

I guess we're gonna stay that way. Look.

Ginger: gilligan, hot water.

Thurston: water boy, where are you hiding?

I'm coming, I'm coming.

Mary ann: gilligan, hot water for the dishes.

Where are you hiding?

Look, I said I was coming... Aaaaaah!

♪ Now this is the tale of our castaways ♪

♪ They're here for a long, long time ♪

♪ They'll have to make the best of things ♪

♪ It's an uphill climb ♪

♪ The first mate and his skipper, too ♪

♪ Will do their very best ♪

♪ To make the others comfortable ♪

♪ In their tropic island nest ♪

No phone... No lights...

♪ No motorcars, not a single luxury ♪

♪ Like robinson crusoe ♪

♪ It's primitive as can be ♪

♪ So join us here each week, my friends ♪

♪ You're sure to get a smile ♪

♪ From stranded castaways ♪

♪ Here on gilligan's isle ♪