02x32 - Meet the Meteor

[bunniefuu]

♪ Just sit right back ♪

♪ And you'll hear a tale ♪

♪ A tale of a fateful trip ♪

♪ That started from this tropic port ♪

♪ Aboard this tiny ship ♪

♪ The mate was a mighty sailin' man ♪

♪ The skipper brave and sure ♪

♪ Passengers set sail that day ♪

♪ For a -hour tour ♪

♪ A -hour tour ♪

♪ The weather started getting rough ♪

♪ The tiny ship was tossed ♪

♪ If not for the courage of the fearless crew ♪

♪ The minnow{\r} would be lost ♪

♪ The minnow{\r} would be lost ♪

♪ The ship's aground on the shore of this ♪

♪ Uncharted desert isle ♪

♪ With gilligan ♪

♪ The skipper, too ♪

♪ The millionaire ♪

♪ And his wife ♪

♪ The movie star ♪

♪ The professor and mary ann ♪

♪ Here on gilligan's isle ♪

Skipper!

Skipper.

Skipper.

Skipper. Skipper.

Ugh!

Gilligan, is this your idea of some kind of a joke?

Look, a falling star!

Gilligan, it's daytime. That's impossible.

Would you believe a falling moon?

No, I wouldn't believe a falling moon.

What would you believe?

I... I believe it's gonna hit the island!

[expl*si*n]

Skipper, what do you think it is?

I don't know, gilligan, but we'd better go see.

Look, gilligan, look!

What a crazy care package.

Looks like something from outer space.

I believe it! No wonder.

After all the stuff we sh*t up there, they finally sh*t back.

I don't mean a w*apon, gilligan. I mean, it's...

It's a piece of meteor.

Oh, no!

A piece of meteor? A meteor?

Yes, a meteor.

What's a meteor?

Oh, brother.

Come on, let's take a closer look.

Hey, skipper, I don't think we should go too close.

Looks kinda spooky.

Gilligan, let me explain.

A piece of meteor is something

Off a star or a planet or something,

And it breaks off every now and then and falls to earth.

Oh, professor: don't go near that!

It talked.

Skipper! Gilligan!

It knows our names.

It's the professor.

Doesn't look like the professor.

Get away from there!

I wonder what he's worried about.

Professor: fast!

Let's go find out. Fast!

What's wrong, professor?

That large, glowing object.

It's a meteor. It's like a little piece

Of star or planet, breaks off...

All right, gilligan. The professor knows all about that.

Now gentlemen, on the one hand,

There may be nothing to worry about.

Good. But on the other hand..

I knew it. It's always the other hand that gets in trouble.

Gilligan, would you be quiet and let the professor talk?

Now these meteors travel millions of miles through space,

Through the stratosphere, the ionosphere,

The radiation belt, picking up

All sorts of strange rays.

That's why it's glowing.

Oh, my gosh.

- What are we gonna do about it?

I have a suggestion.

, What?

This simple form of geiger counter

Will be able to tell us whether that meteor is radioactive.

Oh, professor, if it is, it's absolutely deadly.

Now, just try to be calm.

When I put this fallout meter together,

We'll make a radiation count,

And that way we'll definitely know

Whether there's cause for alarm.

[Blaring]

Gilligan!

My alarm just went off.

Cut that out!

Gilligan, there is great need for secrecy.

Ginger, mary ann, and the howells

Mustn't know anything about this.

That's a good idea, professor.

I'll help you put this together.

Gilligan? Yes, sir?

I... I want you to stand guard outside the hut

And let nobody know what we're doing.

That's easy because I don't even know what we're doing.

By the way, what are we doing?

Gilligan, outside!

Hold this.

Gilligan, what are you supposed to be?

I can't tell you.

What can't you tell me?

Ask me what the skipper and the professor are doing in there.

All right. What are the skipper

And the professor doing in there?

That's what I can't tell you.

Oh, gilligan. Come on.

You can tell ginger.

You might as well not run your fingers through my hair.

You'll probably end up with a palmful of greasy kid stuff.

Why can't you tell me?

My lips are sealed.

There. Did that steam them open?

No, it's a surprise.

Surprise?

My birthday.

A surprise birthday party!

A surprise birthday party?

Oh, you admitted it!

, Gee, I didn't think anybody would remember.

Don't tell anybody that I know!

Ok.

Gilligan!

Why did you do that?

I just wanted to tell you something.

Gilligan, will you please get out of here?

Ginger wanted to know what was happening in here,

But I didn't tell her, but she thinks she knows...

Gilligan! Gilligan, out!

Ok, you don't have to be sore about it.

[Sighs]

Hi, gilligan.

Who goes there... Friend or foe?

Well, it's me, mary ann.

Mary ann who?

Well, how many mary anns do you know?

Well, let me see, I know mary ann finglemeyer.

Mary ann grumschmidt.

Mary ann dinglehopper.

Oh, gilligan, stop that.

I've gotta get in the supply hut

And get some clothespins for the clothes.

Oh, no. No, you can't go in there.

Don't you remember? This is wear your dirty shirt week.

Oh ho, there's something in there you don't want me to see.

Honest, mary ann, I can't tell anyone.

Uh-huh, and if you can't tell anyone,

It must be something for everybody.

Yeah, it's something for everybody, all right.

A christmas party!

They've hidden the presents in there!

They have? Oh, boy!

No, wait a minute, mary ann...

Oh, gilligan, you just can't keep a secret.

Hi!

I didn't tap you on the shoulder that time.

Gilligan, I have a good idea for you.

The next time that you have an urge to come in here,

Conquer it!

Out!

Now let's try it again, professor.

Hello there, gilligan.

Halt! Back up and be recognized!

Recognized? Don't be silly.

We're mr. And mrs. Howell.

You've met us dozens of times.

Stand aside, young man.

We want to get our sun umbrella.

I'm sorry. No one's allowed in there.

Well, I'll have you know that you're speaking to a howell!

I'm sorry. Howells aren't allowed in there, either.

Thurston, I think I'm going to have one of my fainting spells.

No, no, lovey. Let me handle this.

Young man, I'll have you know that

The howells are greeted with open arms

At buckingham palace, the white house,

And the kremlin, which I must point out is easy to get into

But m*rder to get out of.

I'm sorry. No one's allowed in the supply hut.

Oh, but I must get my parasol.

This tropical sun plays havoc

With delicate complexions.

You're so right, and it isn't good

For your skin, either.

I'll tell you this.

The skipper and the professor are working on a secret.

[Gasps] I just adore secrets!

( , )}I love to hear them, and I love to tell them.

Well, I'd love to tell you, but I can't.

Oh, and it doesn't matter because I know anyway.

Egad! You're so right, lovey!

And besides that...

Yes, which can only mean...

An anniversary party?

I'm going to break out my best bottle of bubbly.

Oh, it's going to be marvelous.

I know everyone will be there.

Oh, darling, darling ginger,

We have the most wonderful secret to tell you.

It's about the party.

Oh, gilligan, you promised

You weren't going to tell anyone.

Well, don't worry about the expense of the gifts.

After all, it's the spirit, my dear, that counts.

Gifts? Why should I bring a gift

To my own birthday party?

Gilligan, what is the meaning of this?

I'm kinda confused myself.

Oh, please stop fighting.

We're preparing for the christmas party.

Christmas party? You mean birthday party.

Anniversary party.

Young man, what have you got to say for yourself?

Just one thing. What?

Help!

[Meter clicking]

Aren't we close enough, professor?

Skipper, you just write down the figures as I call them out.

Ok, but talk fast.

All right.

Over .

Over .

Over .

So you see, gilligan,

There was no radiation near the meteor at all.

Oh, boy!

However there were cosmic rays. Oh, boy.

Which aren't as deadly as interstellar radiation.

Oh, boy!

However, they can k*ll you. Oh, boy.

Gilligan, can't you say anything but "oh, boy"?

I could say "oh, girl," but I don't think it'd sound right.

Oh, please, keep digging. Now, for goodness sakes,

The professor's got a way of using these cosmic rays,

And I think he's gonna get us off the island, right?

This reflective screen I'm making will focus those cosmic rays

And sh**t them straight up into the air.

A weather plane or a radiation detection station

Is bound to spot them, investigate,

And we'll be rescued!

Oh, boy!

Skipper.

Yeah, w-well, a skipper's allowed.

You haven't told me why I'm digging for lead.

Why, to protect ourselves from the cosmic rays

When we put this screen around the meteor.

That's right.

You see, we're gonna melt it all down

And dip our clothes into it,

And then they'll be full of lead.

How about that? Instead of getting the lead out,

We're getting the lead in.

Yes, gilligan. Dig!

Hurry it up, gilligan. If this lead gets cold,

It won't stick to the cloth.

This is the last one.

I'm gonna need more of that lead.

Well, there's plenty over there, professor.

Oh, this thing's really gonna hold a press.

Now let the rest of it cool. We may need it later.

Hey, skipper, give me a hand with this.

It's awful heavy.

All right. Have you got this, professor?

I do.

Let's put it over there with the other things.

We'd better start getting into our things.

Shoes first.

Here. Shoes first.

Skipper: hey, gilligan,

How'd you get your pants on?

Stand me up and I'll tell you.

Whoo. You fall down, you break your pants.

Yeah, well, be careful, too.

You might break your neck.

Professor, how're you gonna walk in these things?

Well, lead is a soft metal.

It'll loosen up as you move around a bit.

By the way, how did you get into them?

, You take the pants, lay 'em down there,

And then you kinda sit down and kinda...

Slide in!

I'm afraid it's rather difficult to walk.

This lead makeup sure feels funny, professor.

Well, we needed to protect our faces from the cosmic rays.

I feel like frankenstein.

[Groaning]

[Groaning]

[Moaning]

Come back here, gilligan!

Cut that out!

We'd better move on. We're almost there.

Oh, I hope so. These suits are sure uncomfortable.

But I bet they wear like iron.

Come on, gilligan!

Why, it's wonderful.

It's wonderful!

The count has dropped almost to zero!

You mean it might work?

I think so.

I'd better go tell the others.

Skipper: gilligan!

Gilligan: skipper.

Give me a hand.

[Grunting] gilligan. Up!

Wait, wait, wait!

There's something funny going on back there.

Oh, well we could use some laughs, professor. Let's go back.

No, no, no. I don't mean funny funny.

I mean funny strange.

Come on.

Professor, what happened to the bamboo screen?

Why, I'm afraid to even guess.

I just noticed something.

Look at this tree!

Gilligan, it's just a tree.

Yeah, but a few minutes ago,

It was only feet tall.

What do you mean a few minutes ago it was only feet tall?

Gilligan, for goodness sakes...

No, no, skipper. He's right.

I remember that tree.

He tripped over it.

This is the tree that he tripped...

Oh, well, professor, what does it mean?

Well, it means we've got to get rid of that meteor

Before it gets rid of us.

Gets rid of us?

Gilligan, those cosmic rays are so powerful

That they aged that bamboo screen

Into sawdust in just a few minutes.

Oh... And that tree?

A little while ago that tree was a sapling.

It's now fully grown and will die of old age within a week!

You mean to say that the cosmic rays

That this meteor puts out makes things grow older?

Yes, they speed up the life process at an incredible rate.

You've made me feel older since you've been talking.

W-w-well, w-what about the plants

And the trees and the bamboo...

And the people?

Uh, I'm afraid that within a week,

We shall all die of old age.

However, the others don't know

About this, so let's not tell them.

I only have one thing to say.

What's that?

Why'd you have to tell me?

Why? Why did you have to tell me?

Why? Why did you have to tell me?

Why'd you have to tell me?

All right, gilligan! [Clangs]

Professor, this is the worst spot we've ever been in.

Can't you think of something?

I... I am thinking.

Can you think faster?

Are you thinking faster?

Skipper, I am thinking as fast as I can.

Well, it's not fast enough!

You know, I know a way I could think faster.

How?

If you'd stop telling me to think faster.

[Playing music]

Gilligan, this is no time to be listening

To the radio. Now turn that music off!

Why? After next week, we won't have time to listen to anything.

Radio: we interrupt this program

For a special weather bulletin.

Gilligan, will you turn that radio off? You heard me.

No, no, no. Leave it alone a minute.

Radio: the storm that was due to hit hawaii this morning

Has passed to the south and is traveling

In an easterly direction.

It's an electrical storm of such intensity

That it has been lighting up skies for miles around.

All airlines and ships have been rerouted.

Oh, great. That's all we need is a storm.

Well, it's not just a storm, skipper.

It's an electrical storm.

You've seen one storm, you've seen them all.

No, but this one may save us.

( , )} Can save us?

Well, that meteor out there

Is making us grow older every minute.

All right. Now listen, skipper.

Meteorites are composed of metals.

They're made of metals... Iron compounds.

Now if that storm should pass over the island,

It might just possibly destroy it.

Oh, come on, profes...

A storm destroy that meteorite?

Good question.

Thanks, gilligan.

All right, now listen to me.

We make a lightning rod,

We attach it to the meteorite,

And if just one bolt hits it...

Oh, professor.

You mean a bolt of lightning strike...

What are the odds on that?

Well, a million to one.

Oh, fine. A million to one.

What could be worse than that?

A million to none.

Exactly!

At least it gives us a possibility.

I mean, that's better than nothing.

Yeah. I'll go tell the others the good news.

No, wait a minute. How can you tell them the good news

When we haven't told them the bad news yet?

I mean, that is, unless of course you...

Me? Why would I do a thing like that?

[Crying] oh, ginger.

Do I look any older to you?

[Crying] no.

Do I look any older to you?

No.

Oh, we're too young to die of old age.

[Sobbing]

Wait a minute.

What if the professor is wrong?

Hey, yeah. What if he's wrong?

On the other hand, what if he's right?

[Wailing] [wailing]

[Knocking on door]

Come in.

Ginger, mary ann. I've got some good news.

You have? Good news?

Yeah. There's a big storm coming this way,

And the professor figured out a way to destroy the meteorite.

Oh, gilligan, I could kiss you!

Oh, so could i!

Yeah, a bolt of lightning has to hit it.

A bolt of lightning... Has to hit it?

Yeah. The professor's gonna make a big, big,

Long lightning rod to make the odds better.

And exactly what will that make the odds?

A million to one.

And you call that good news?

Well, that's better than the bad news.

Oh, gilligan.

Well, you haven't told the howells about this, have you?

Me? Why would I do a thing like that?

And being of sound mind,

I do hereby bequeath to my nephew perry

My favorite polo pony, sea biscuit,

And my set of matched golf clubs,

Wingfoot, hillcrest, and pebble beach,

And the $ . His wife frances owes me

I do hereby negate in full.

Thurston, it makes me very sad writing your will.

But, dear, we always knew that one day we'd have to go

To that great safety deposit box in the sky.

Yes, but after all,

In the past we've always gone first class.

Have you any regrets, dear?

No, my dear.

No, no, perhaps one.

That I won't live to be years old.

Oh, but you will, dear.

You'll be that on saturday.

How much time do you think we have left?

Well, gilligan said about a week.

Oh. Only a week. Oh.

Oh, the professor'll simply have to do something.

I can't go. I haven't got a thing to wear!

Professor, shouldn't a lightning rod

Be made out of copper or steel or something?

Yes. Obviously,

The better the conductor, the better our chances,

But all we have to work with is this lead.

This is the straightest, longest bamboo pole

I could find, professor.

Well, that's just fine, gilligan.

Now put one end into this pot and keep turning it.

The lead'll gradually harden on the pole.

Huh. That's it.

Hey, I'm making a leadsicle.

Well, there you are, professor.

The lightning rod's all finished.

Well, just put it down. Let it cool and harden,

And we'll finish the work in the hut.

All right.

Oh, should I wake up gilligan?

No, he's exhausted. Just let him stay there.

Professor: cosmic rays are speeding up the life cycle,

Making everything older.

By the end of the week, we'll be years older.

Soon we'll all be years older.

Years older.

Years older.

Years older.

[Humming]

Better hurry up, skipper.

You're gonna be late for the party tonight.

Well, don't just stand there, gilligan.

Come over and help me.

Well, hurry it up.

I'm running.

Ungh!

[Grunting]

Pull, gilligan.

Thanks, little buddy. Heh heh heh.

( , )}Well, it's hard to realize

This th anniversary on this island.

Years.

One good thing about it...

We know everybody at the party.

Heh heh heh heh.

[Gasping]

Well, hand me my cane, gilligan.

Either that cane's getting heavier,

Or I'm getting older.

Well, naturally, gilligan.

You're getting older,

So the cane is getting heavier.

Thank you.

Shall we start going?

Lovey, my dear,

Help me with my tie, will you?

Oh, yes, of course, thurston.

Come over here.

Oh, thank heavens it's downhill.

There you go, my dear.

Oh, where's your bow tie, thurston?

This is my bow tie.

It's worn out through the years.

Erosion, you know.

[Crackling]

Dear, did you hear all that crackling?

I'm afraid they put too much starch

In your shirt.

Oh, no, that wasn't starch.

It was my arteries hardening!

Noisy little sons of g*ns, aren't they?

Oh, yes.

Thurston, help me select a piece of jewelry.

All right, my dear.

I'll help you.

Oh, this one is just... Heavy one.

You'll never be able to wear it, my dear.

Oh, nonsense, thurston.

Diamonds are never too heavy.

Put it on me, please.

There you are.

I'll put it on you, my dear.

Oh, it must be terribly uncomfortable.

Oh, on the contrary,

It's a delightful way to get the bends.

Come along, dear.

Tell the truth,

I feel more comfortable that way myself.

Let me get my little hatty.

And away we go!

[Groaning] out on the town!

Oh, cab! [Groans]

Here, zip me up.

All right.

Oh, I can't.

What's the matter?

I haven't got enough zip left in my zipper.

Use both your hands.

All right.

[Grunts] there.

Mary ann, do you think that anyone

Will recognize this dress from last year,

Or the year before, or the year before,

Or the year before?

Oh, yes, I know.

You don't have to go over the last years.

Years? Please!

It's not a day over .

Oh, I forgot.

We started subtracting years ago.

Professor: yo ho! Yo ho!

Are you ladies dressed?

Oh, i... I thought the skipper and gilligan

Were coming to call for us.

Well, it was too far for them to walk.

Why, you ladies certainly look

As beautiful as ever tonight.

[Chuckles] professor,

I bet you say that to all the girls.

Mary ann, we are all the girls.

Well, if you're ready,

Let's go to the party.

I'm ready.

I'm ready, too.

All right, if each one of you will take an arm,

I think that I'll be able to make it.

[Laughing together]

Oh! There, let's have a ball.

[Everybody talking]

I'd like to... Quiet! Ooh!

Quiet! I'd like to propose a toast

To our th anniversary.

Th!

Anyone for ?

Oh, !

I won't argue the point. I'm a gentleman,

But it's... It's that we've been here.

All right now, here's a toast to the island.

I raise my cup of grog.

Though life hasn't been easy here,

At least we've been out of the smog.

Ha ha ha!

Oh, thurston, you haven't lost your touch.

Oh, let's have some music.

Yeah, let's dance.

Come on, ginger. Let's dance!

Come on, professor, move!

Get up there, girly. [Music plays on radio]

And we'll go around in a bit of a twirl, huh?

Ok.

Old man on radio: we interrupt this program

For a special weather bulletin.

The storm is about to hit this area

At any moment.

[Thunders]

See?

And it looks like a real fish-wiper.

[Thundering]

The storm is here!

[Thundering]

Lightning rod...

Got to get it into the meteor!

Help!

[Gilligan screams] oh, help!

Something's happening to my little buddy!

Little buddy, are you all right?

Yeah, I'm ok,

But I lost the lightning rod!

It flew out of my hands,

And I don't know where it went!

Look! Look at the meteor!

Gilligan, the meteor disintegrated!

Not only that, it broke into a million pieces!

Yes!

Well, I just told the others the good news.

Not a trace of cosmic rays!

Well, that's wonderful, professor!

That's the best news I ever heard.

Oh, gilligan, you've been looking at that mirror

For the last minutes!

I know.

I don't think I look bad for a man of .


♪ Now this is the tale of our castaways ♪

♪ They're here for a long, long time ♪

♪ They'll have to make ♪

♪ The best of things ♪

♪ It's an uphill climb ♪

♪ The first mate and his skipper, too ♪

♪ Will do their very best ♪

♪ To make the others comfortable ♪

♪ In their tropic island nest ♪

♪ No phone ♪ ♪ no lights ♪

♪ No motor cars, not a single luxury ♪

♪ Like robinson crusoe ♪

♪ It's primitive as can be ♪

♪ So join us here each week, my friends ♪

♪ You're sure to get a smile ♪

♪ From stranded castaways ♪

♪ Here on gilligan's isle ♪