♪ Yell at me all you want,
that's just fueling the fire ♪
Ah, sh**t, anyone have a charger?
Oh, I got you.
I know it's in here somewhere.
Just give me a sec.
Okay.
Okay.
Hey, I didn't know you play tennis.
I don't.
- [DRILL WHIRS]
- Yeah, practical.
You know what, Nicky? It's okay.
- I think I'll be fine without it.
- No, it's definitely in here.
Just give me a second.
Nunchucks.
[GROANS]
Maybe the charger's not in there?
Oh, my gosh.
You are totally right.
It's definitely in here.
Just give me one sec.
♪ Whoop, whoop ♪
♪ Cabernet and Sauvignon ♪
♪ Team is here and now it's on ♪
♪ Carry on and Carignan,
sippin' on Perignon ♪
♪ Fine wine, got notes like a cello ♪
♪ Pull up in the spot like hello ♪
♪ If you got me, then I got you ♪
♪ This is the vibe, this is the crew ♪
♪ Grand crew, grand crew, uh ♪
♪ Grand crew, grand crew,
grand crew, uh ♪
♪ Grand crew ♪
Uh-oh.
You got that look, Noah.
What look? That look you give
when you're about to listen
to some Drake
and then make some mistakes with an ex.
So what's her name,
and what went wrong?
- Her name is my dad.
- For real?
I know a My-Leene,
I know a My-Qweesha,
but I ain't never met no My-Dad.
No, I'm talking about my actual dad.
He's been off at work lately,
and I'm just getting a little worried.
You and your dad work together?
Yeah, he owns an independent copy shop,
and I've been managing it
ever since college.
But yesterday out of nowhere,
he did the craziest thing.
- Good morning, son.
- Morning, Dad.
BOTH: He closed the door
to the back room.
So? I close doors all the time.
It's part of my everyday life.
You have to know my dad
to understand the gravity
of the situation.
He never closes that door
unless he's stressed about work.
But everything's been fine
at the shop lately.
Then why don't you ask
your dad what's up?
[LAUGHTER]
Talk to my dad about his feelings?
Nicky, did you hear what she just said?
Oh, I did. Fay, you a hoot.
Emotionally, my father's like
that part in the ocean
that everyone knows is there
but it's too deep and dark to reach.
Wait, that's not unusual.
We all have deep-ocean dads, right?
- Absolutely.
- Oh, yes, bro.
I love my dad and he loves me back,
but he's only hugged me
one time in my life.
And I think that was
because he lost his balance
and fell into me on the escalator.
I'm just saying the tension
that builds from not talking
can cause problems.
It led to my parents' divorce,
which is why I vowed
to always speak my mind,
and it's been working out great for me.
But didn't you also get divorced?
I did, but it was all my ex's fault,
and I told him that constantly.
Look, communication
isn't our problem, okay?
On the basketball court
of life, my dad and I
have a Stockton-Malone,
no-look-pass kind of vibe.
I can assist him
without even saying a word.
Yeah, and in that metaphor,
I'm the old white owner
who watches the game from afar
as Noah does all the work.
Exactly. When he's sniffling,
I got the meds on deck.
When he's yawning,
I got the pillows on fluff.
And when he's stressing at work,
I got the key lime pie on a slice.
♪
Mmm.
That's nice.
♪
I mean, that's his favorite,
and it works every time.
Sounds like a tremendous amount of work
- to avoid a conversation.
- Yes, it is.
Thank you so much for
acknowledging all my efforts.
Now, Fay, I'm aware
that you like to bake.
Would you perchance be able
to bake me a good key lime pie?
Yes, I am willing to make you one
if you really want to keep
being avoidant with your dad.
I would love to keep
doing that, so thank you.
I wish a slice of pie
would fix my family problems.
My older brother, Michael,
is coming to town.
Why is that a problem?
You'll get it once you meet him.
Michael is... a lot.
A lot? How?
Can you please pass the popcorn?
Sure. Here you go, dummy.
[LAUGHS]
So he picks on you a little.
Isn't that just brotherly love?
For kids, not adults.
As a person in general, he's... a lot.
You keep saying "a lot" a lot.
'Cause he's a lot.
But I have the perfect solution.
Stand up for yourself
and tell him to stop
because you're a grown man
with a mortgage and a wife?
Of course not. Fay, you sound nuts.
My perfect solution
is the three-day visit.
Now, it's the perfect amount of time
to enjoy each other's company,
and just before his presence
becomes too much,
his a-lot ass is on a plane
back to Pittsburgh.
What's with men?
Fathers, sons, brothers,
and not a single one knows
how to talk to the other.
- Right?
- Right?
I'm sorry, Nicky,
do you want to help with Dad?
What? No, I'm one of the boys.
Just had another bad job interview.
These are becoming pointless, bro.
- I'm sorry to hear that.
- And they never say it,
but I know it's because
I don't have a degree.
Damn.
- Damn!
- Okay, that first "damn" was for me,
but the second one
was clearly about you.
What's going on?
So I just started learning
how to play chess.
And I've been playing against
this woman, QueensGambit ,
but she's been whooping my ass.
Damn! Damn!
- What opening are you using?
- What?
I opened the app with my finger, bro.
- What do you mean?
- Oh, Lord.
Give me your phone.
There. Now take her rook,
and you'll be on the path to victory.
You have no idea what to do next.
I do not. There you go.
One order of avoidance pie.
Aw, that's would be for me. Thank you.
So this is where you work.
I thought this was a place
you make copies.
- What's with all the donuts?
- It's called Copy and Donuts.
It's a pun on "coffee and donuts."
I get the pun, but it's just
a really random combination.
Come on, haven't you ever
been printing a copy
and gotten hungry for a snack?
- Nah, bro.
- Well, this isn't "Shark t*nk."
I don't need to sell
this business to you.
We've been open for years,
and we're doing fine.
- Okay.
- Ooh.
How much for a slice of pie?
Oh, sorry. This isn't for sale.
We don't sell pies. We sell donuts.
You can't sell both?
No, it's called Copy and Donuts.
It's in the name.
But does that have to be the name?
I get it, you have some
issues with the business,
but you don't have to keep saying that.
I speak my mind, remember?
Okay, well, please take
a hiatus on doing that,
because my dad's here.
- Good morning, son.
- Hey, Dad.
This is my friend Fay.
Fay, this is my dad.
Hello, Fay. Nice to meet you.
Actually, she brought over
some delicious key lime pie.
Do you want a slice?
No, thank you. I'm not in the mood.
He denied the pie.
So I can't buy the pie,
but he got it offered to him for free?
Oh, my God, dude. Just take it.
Dope.
Hello, everybody.
This is my older brother, Michael.
Michael, is the crew.
Y'all must have lost a bet or something
to be hanging out
with my idiot brother.
[LAUGHTER]
- Big bro got you, Wyatt.
- Thank you. Thank you.
So who y'all having sex with?
- What?
- Come on, now.
You know I heard about the crew.
Y'all out in these streets,
except for this married chump. [LAUGHS]
You two hooking up?
[LAUGHS] What?
Aw, y'all, we all adults here.
Let's talk about
a little adult content,
you know what I'm saying, man?
- Okay.
- Wow, he is a lot.
I told you.
Still worried about your dad?
Yeah. After you left,
he really started falling apart.
- What's weird about that?
- He was on the computer.
He never uses the computer at work.
He doesn't trust them ever since Y K.
- Nothing happened on Y K.
- Exactly.
He thinks that was a part of it
and that something
much bigger is on the way.
I just need to figure out
what's going on.
But how do you find out
something about someone else
without ever talking to them?
By snooping through
their personal belongings?
- Yes. That's a great idea.
- For the record,
I was just helping you
complete your thought.
I wasn't suggesting you actually do it.
No, it was your idea,
and I agreed to it.
Tomorrow morning, we're searching
through my dad's computer,
and it's gonna make everything better.
This is gonna be fun.
He's selling the business.
Someone wants to buy this place?
I mean oh, my God.
I can't believe
he's selling the business.
I always thought that I would
take over the shop, but...
he's just selling it
without telling me?
This is why you don't snoop.
Well, you should've told me
not to snoop, then.
- I did.
- Nobody remembers that.
Look, the answer is simple.
You need to talk.
And I know just
how to make that happen.
When my parents didn't talk
for this long,
I just locked them in a room.
Isn't that the plot
from some ' s movie?
Yes, "House Arrest."
Sometimes plots of movies
are good real-life ideas:
"Air Bud," "Soul Plane,"
- "Jurassic Park."
- "Jurassic Park"?
Yeah, so many people d*ed.
You're telling me
you wouldn't go to a park
full of actual dinosaurs
right now if you could?
You're right, yeah,
I'd be first in line.
Dinosaurs are the original birds.
So what do you say?
You want me to lock you in a room?
Look, I'm not gonna
"House Arrest" my dad, okay?
Now that I know what the problem is,
I just need to Stockton
and Malone it like always.
If he's selling, that must mean
the business is in trouble,
so we just need to drum up
some business.
How are you gonna do that?
Hi. Do you guys
have any pie?
No. We only sell donuts.
Really? My friend came by yesterday
and said they had the best key lime pie
they'd ever tasted in their life.
Well, I don't know
what to tell you, homey.
We are Copy and Donuts.
- Noah.
- What?
Oh, my God. We need to sell your pies.
[MELLOW HIP-HOP MUSIC]
♪
Nicky? Why are you in my home?
And why are you here
so early in the mo...
No, no, no. You didn't.
Standing still
doesn't make you invisible.
Did you sleep with my brother?
And don't you lie to me.
Oh, yes,
like, three times last night.
Didn't need to know
how many rounds you went.
Just wanted a yes or no.
You said don't lie to you.
Also two more times this morning, ee!
Why? You agreed that he was a lot.
Well, he is, but he's also so cute.
And I realized he's only here
for three days.
That's the perfect amount of time
to share each other's company
before his presence becomes too much,
his a-lot ass is back
on a plane to Pittsburgh.
Those were my exact words
about the perfect brother visit.
And now it applies to me getting busy.
Hey, hey, hey, raise your hand
if you had sex last night
and twice this morning.
Ow!
Nicky!
What?
Sherm, I need you to make
some more chess moves for me.
QueensGambit has been in my DMs heavy
since you started doing it.
- I think she's feeling the kid.
- I ain't surprised.
Chess can be a very sexual game.
I think it stems from the tension
between the black and the white pieces.
- So you'll hook it up?
- Only if you help me
polish up my résumé.
I'm still having a hard time
finding a job.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
- Okay.
Checkmate.
Damn. How'd you get so good at chess?
When I was a young un,
used to see this old heads
playing Leimert Park.
One day, they invited me to play.
They used to crush me,
until the day came
when I began to crush them.
The student became the master.
That's right. I got so good,
I even started a little chess g*ng.
Nobody on the block messed with us.
We were made men,
until the old Benny came around.
It was a Sunday afternoon...
Sherm, I'm sure this story
gives a lot of texture
as to who you are,
but right now, I have a crisis.
QueensGambit wants
to meet up in person
for a date to play chess.
- But you're terrible.
- Exactly.
The only reason she's feeling
me is because of your moves.
If we play in person, she's
gonna know something's up.
I need you to teach me your ways.
You can't just teach somebody
to play chess in one day.
You've got to live it.
You've got to breathe it.
It's not just a board game.
It takes time.
- I'll pay you bucks.
- It's just a board game.
I'll teach you today, baby.
- Mmm, these are good eggs.
- I'm glad you like them.
- I kind of wanted to try some.
- My bad.
I thought the whole pan
was for me, but I can share.
Here, Nicky, you want some, babe?
Oh, no, it's okay. Oh, it's happening.
Mmm, very good.
Well, we should probably
wrap up breakfast.
We have so much to fit in
since it's such a quick trip.
Oh, about that. I have decided to stay.
- What?
- Until when?
Until forever, dummy.
That is... so great.
It is?
It is.
All right. There you are.
- Thank you so much.
- Thanks.
What's this all about, Noah?
Remember that key lime pie
that Fay made?
It's a hit. People love it.
We're selling pie?
But, son, we're Copy and Donuts.
Believe me, it was really hard for me
to wrap my brain
around it at first too.
But I was just trying
to figure out a way
to drum up some more business.
Why? The shop's doing fine.
But...
- is it, though?
- Yes.
- Then why...
- Then why what?
Oh, did I say, "Then why?"
What I meant to say was...
"Then pie?"
Would you like some?
No, thank you.
Still not in the mood.
He denied the pie twice.
What the hell is going on?
Here you go, more delicious ways
to avoid communication.
Yeah, great. Thanks.
What's up?
Looks like things
are going really well here.
Yeah, I mean,
the pies are selling great,
but my dad is still in a mood.
And on top of that, he said the
business is doing totally fine.
- Then why is he selling it?
- I don't know. I can't ask that.
Okay, we're gonna get
to the bottom of this, but...
first, can you help me
carry these pies to the back?
Sure.
- Hi there.
- Hello.
Okay, great,
now that all the pies are in,
there's was just one
last thing for me to do.
- What's that?
- "House Arrest"!
Wait, Fay! No! Damn it.
Damn it!
Man, that was fun.
Hot take: I love L.A. traffic.
Gives me more time to sing in the car.
You only sang one song
over and over again,
and it was
"I Love L.A." by Randy Newman.
I know, 'cause that's my jam.
You only sang the chorus.
Yeah, that's the best part of the song.
In fact, all songs should
just be the chorus, honestly.
Yo, I'm b*at. I'm gonna take a nap.
Nicky, you want to join?
Oh, I'm good. Thank you.
Okay, well, the offer will always stand
'cause I'm here for good, baby.
Bow!
[LAUGHS]
This is a nightmare.
Michael moving to L.A.
is the opposite of small doses.
In fact, it is an overdose,
and you know what, Nicky?
You know what? I blame you.
Don't blame me.
I wanted a vacationship,
not a relationship.
I want him gone just as much as you do.
- Then help me fix this.
- Okay.
I am way ahead of you.
Trust me. I have the perfect plan.
Wake up! It's time to train.
It's the middle of the day.
I've been awake.
Well, I just woke up from a nap!
So let's get to work.
Polish Opening.
Wrong. Bird's Opening.
Wrong. Catalan Opening.
Wrong again.
It's the queen that's really
about that street life.
She'll clap anybody in any type of way.
Blap, blap, blap!
She wants all the smoke.
Dutch Defense.
French Defense.
Benoni.
Faster. Again.
I think I'm starting to get it.
These rooks aren't looking
for any trouble,
but don't cross them,
or else pew, pew, pew!
- ♪ Winning it all ♪
- ♪ Ain't gonna walk away ♪
Checkmate?
Say it again, but now say it
with your chest.
Because you did it.
- Checkmate!
- [LAUGHS]
- Blap, blap, blap!
- Pew, pew, pew!
Michael will already
be thinking about leaving,
and once the improve group
starts to perform,
he's as good as gone.
Are you sure? Because this seems
like a pretty crazy
and elaborate scheme.
Trust me, it's the perfect plan
to get rid of Michael.
What's that?
Michael, you're here.
Yeah, I was taking a nap
underneath this blanket.
So you were sleeping
and you didn't hear
what we were talking about?
No, I heard the whole thing.
I just kept on listening,
hoping y'all would say, "Psych,"
but you didn't.
- Let me explain.
- You don't need to explain.
I heard the whole plan, and honestly,
- it would have worked.
- I knew it.
But overhearing it works too.
I'm out.
What is wrong with the pie lady?
Why'd she lock us in here?
She just wants us to talk
about our problems.
You have a problem with me?
No, mm-mm.
You know, we should work
on getting this door open.
It can't be that hard.
Noah, don't turn your back on me.
I'm your father.
Noah.
- Noah!
- Why won't this open?
Noah, stop ignoring me!
Will you just shut up
and let me try this?
You don't tell me to shut up.
[GRUNTS]
Did you just throw a pie at my head?
You were acting like a child.
The guy who throws a pie
is calling me a child?
You're the child.
That all you got?
You only hit me because
I didn't see the pie com...
- Damn it.
- Stop dawdling around the issue
- and tell me what's going on.
- I'm not dawdling. I'm...
I said no dawdling.
It's just that I'm try...
Why didn't you tell me
you were gonna sell the shop?
What?
That's...
- That's what's wrong?
- Who is dawdling now?
Damn it, I was so close
to hitting you that time.
Me selling my shop
is none of your business, son.
Well, it is my job and my life.
You mean the life I provided you.
You don't appreciate
anything I do for you.
What you do for me?
I do everything for you.
You have no idea
how much I take on to make sure
that you're okay ever since Mom d*ed.
And for what?
For you to leave me out of your
most important decisions?
Nah, screw that.
I'm done with you.
Ha! I got you!
I didn't realize you felt that way.
I'm not hearing anything in there.
Is that the sweet silence
of a father-son hug?
Oh, no.
For the record,
this was not part of the plan.
[DRAMATIC HIP-HOP MUSIC]
♪
I guess being straightforward
about everything
you think at all times
has its downsides.
It wasn't your fault.
That was just...
three decades of untapped
conversation flowing out.
I said some really hurtful stuff,
and I don't know what to do.
Excuse me. Can I get a slice of pie?
Sorry, there was an incident.
We're all out of pie,
and I don't think we're gonna
be selling them anymore.
Really?
It's gone?
I took too long, darn.
I took the pie for granted.
I was assuming
it was going to be around.
[SOMBER MUSIC]
I guess the life lesson is,
if you love something,
don't overthink it.
Just show up for it right away.
♪
Well, that was interesting.
Yeah, that guy was being
super weird about the pie.
Noah.
Oh, my God. The pie is my dad.
There you go.
Michael,
we need to talk.
I want to explain my actions.
Okay. Go ahead.
I was wrong to want to get rid of you.
But the truth is, you are mean.
Oh, that's a weird apology.
It's not an apology.
You are not a nice person.
What are you talking about, fool?
See, man, there it is.
Right there.
Now, that hurt me for so long,
but now I realize
it's the only way that you know
how to communicate your love.
No, it's not, dummy.
I'm not dumb.
I'm a smart boy.
And I also love you.
Now, whether you're willing
to say it or not,
I know that you love me.
All right, whatever, man.
You're a clown.
No, I'm not. I love you, Michael.
Okay, bro, just chill.
I'm chill, and I love you, Michael.
I love that you're a big old
bald dummy.
- I love you, Michael.
- All right, stop.
- I love you, Michael.
- You smell weird.
I love you, Michael.
I love you man. I'm sorry.
I love you too, bro.
♪ Yeah ♪
Anthony, how was your
chess date with QueensGambit ?
It was not what I expected.
Thank you for flowers.
Yeah, turns out, QueensGambit
is actually a -year-old
Russian man named Oleg.
I'm sorry we put in
all that work for nothing.
Oh, not for nothing.
I destroyed him in chess.
You stayed on the date with him?
I had to try out my skills.
I paid good money for them.
Oh-ho-ho-ho!
Well, I'm glad you were
satisfied with my services.
Hey, look, I know you've been
looking for a more steady job,
but I was thinking
maybe you want to try
teaching or tutoring.
The way you broke things down
for me really clicked.
Huh. I might do that.
- [CELL PHONE CHIMES]
- Oh. Ah.
Oleg just texted me.
- You're still talking to him?
- Oh yeah.
He's really dope. And he actually
cuts hair at a Black barbershop.
Hey, everybody, we are back,
and I have some exciting news.
My brother is moving to L.A.
[CHUCKLES] Great.
I love this. Wow, wow.
Look, I want y'all to know
I think you're all really, really cool,
especially my brother. He's dope.
And I don't expect a ton of your time.
Just think of me
as someone you can call
if you ever want to use me.
Mostly that's for you, Nicky,
- for the sex.
- Oh, yeah, I got it.
- 'Cause I'm ready.
- [CHUCKLES] Great.
So, Mr. Coleman,
this is a special Pinot
from Theopolis Vineyards.
It's a crisp and apologetic wine.
It's a wine that says, "I am so sorry
I locked you in that room."
- Thank you.
- That was nice.
Does my wine have
a nice message attached to it?
Yes, it says, "It'll be $
to pay me back for all those pies."
So I invited you here
because I think we need to...
actually talk.
Agreed.
But first, cheers.
Cheers.
[BOTH GULPING]
Okay, I'm ready.
Noah, I'm selling the business
because I'm thinking about retiring.
Why didn't you want to tell me that?
Because I didn't want to put the burden
of the shop onto you.
I always thought you came to
work at the shop after college
because you didn't want me
to be lonely.
I feel like I took away
the opportunity for you
to pursue your true passions, so...
selling it after I retire
seemed like the best way
to set you free.
You didn't make me
come back to the shop.
I came there because honestly...
I love working with you.
So we're both just trying
to take care of the other
and doing it all wrong, huh?
Maybe I'll put my plans
to sell the shop on hold.
Very cool. Yeah, that's really cool.
Maybe we could
get drinks like this more often.
I'd like that.
I love you, Noah.
I love you too, Dad.
[CELL PHONE CHIMES]
What'd I tell you about leaving
your cell phone out like that?
Y K is done, Dad.
That's what the machines
want you to think.
You guys wanted to see me?
Is everything okay?
Yeah, everything's fine.
I just thought it'd be a good idea
if you and Dad started talking
a little bit more.
Talking? Me, Dad?
But why?
- "House Arrest"!
- Take a seat, Nicky.
Okay.
Okay,
let's talk.