03x15 - Down to Clown

Episode transcripts for the TV show "9-1-1: Lone Star". Aired: January 19, 2020 to present.*
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A NYC firefighter relocates to Austin, Texas with his son, where he tries to start a new life while he works to save people's lives.
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03x15 - Down to Clown

Post by bunniefuu »

Hey, folks, this is
Ronald the Survival Guy.


Today, I am building
a primitive lean-to,


ideal if you ever find yourself

in the case of emergency shelter.

As you can see, I've already gathered

quite the stack of brush.

And with my trusty Kn*fe,

I'm sharpening this y-stick.

Now, I usually don't get
personal on these blogs,

but a lot of you've been asking

why Brittany is no longer in my videos.

Long story short, she met a gentleman

with another more, heh,
popular bushcraft vlog.


I'm not gonna say names.

But just so you know,
it's gonna take a lot more


than that to break me.

Oh, wow.

I don't know if
you guys can see this, but...


an alligator lizard
just paid us a visit.

How about I show you all how to
grill up a little lizard snack?

(LAUGHS)

(GRUNTS, LAUGHS) He's wily.

(GRUNTS)

Wily. (GRUNTS)

(SCREAMING)

Oh God! Ow!

TOMMY: Hello!

Austin Emergency Services!

He's gotta be close.

Guy told dispatch he was
half a click south of the road

before his cell dropped out.

Better than a whole click, I guess.

RONALD: Hey, I'm here! Please help!

Alright. Emergency services.
We're coming to you!

RONALD (GROANING): I'm here!

I'm here. Oh, God.

(GROANING) I'm here. I'm...

- I'm here (GROANING)
- Alright.

TK, get his vitals.

- Nancy, inspect the wound.
- Oh, God.

I understand you have a s*ab wound.

- Is that correct?
- I accidentally got myself.

Cap, I'm seeing a strange lump.

- Cap, it moved! The lump moved.
- Ah!

Oh, yeah, it's a sneaky
little bastard, alright.

- Holy God. What is that?
- Alligator lizard.

That's what I was going for

when I got myself
and then it climbed inside.

(SCREAMING) Just get it out!

- Please.
- Alright. Alright.

TK, grab your tourniquet.

Let's keep that little bugger
from going up any higher.

(RONALD GROANS)

(SCREAMS)

Just one last twist.

- (SCREAMS)
- There we go.

Dude is lit.

RONALD: And it's mating season,

so he's gonna already be worked up.

If he comes out, he's gonna be
looking to att*ck.

Then we'll give him something to att*ck.

TK, grab his shoulders.

Nancy, hold his feet.

- Yeah, Cap.
- (GROANS)

TOMMY: Ron, listen to me.

I'm gonna need you
to brace yourself, okay?

This is gonna hurt.

It can't hurt more than it already does.

Okay, here we go.

- (RONALD SCREAMING)
- NANCY: Cap, what are you doing?

You're just gonna piss it off even more.

- That's the idea.
- (GROANING)

- TOMMY: Come on.
- RONALD (SCREAMING): Oh, God!

- Come on.
- (RONALD SCREAMING)

Okay, that's it.

(QUIETLY): There he is.

TK, grab the biohazard bag. There we go.

There.

Cap, what are we gonna
do with this thing?

Uh, that's for Animal Control
to sort out.

Let's package him up,
get him ready for travel.

How you doing, Ron?

Oh, better. But-but could you...

Yes, Nancy, uh, would you
get rid of the tourniquet?

- It's got to hurt like hell.
- RONALD: Thanks.

Say, could you hold it up
for the camera?

My subscribers are gonna
wanna see a close-up.

DR. PATT: So when we last spoke,
we talked about you

making a note of those moments
during the week

when you felt rage building
or an urge to lash out.

Yeah.

DR. PATT: And how did that fare?

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

I see.

Okay.

Right.

Huh.

Okay.

Oh, wow.

Should you be saying "wow"?

It's fairly frequent, isn't it,

these feelings of rage?

When I told you
I was pissed off all the time,

I meant all the time.

I just don't know why all of a sudden.

Well, maybe it's not
as sudden as you think.

It's possible
that the roots of your anger

go deeper than you know.

I'd like to try something.

Have you heard of EMDR?

I think I listened to 'em in the ' s.

No, it's Eye Movement
Desensitization and Reprocessing.

It's a form of therapy that allows us

to occupy your active mind

so as to free up your unconscious mind.

And you think that's gonna
unlock the source of my rage?

It might.

Now watch the ball on the screen.

Deep breaths.

Follow the ball.

Breathing.

Good.

Okay, what do you see
in your mind's eye right now?

A spot on my lung.

My tumor.

- DR. PATT: Deep breaths.
- (OWEN EXHALES)

Follow the ball.

And what do you see now?

My son in a hospital bed.

He's got a tube down his throat.

DR. PATT: Watching the ball.
What about now?

A red, uh...

Big red nose.

Like a bloody nose?

No, like a-a, uh...

Like, like a rubber, like a...

It's a clown.

Alright, I think that's a good start.

Let's take a break.

(EXHALES) Yeah, I think we got
a little off-track there.

I think we are right on our way,
actually.

Tell me about the clown.

- What?
- The clown.

It's the only time that you took
your eyes away from the screen

and your respiration
became notably more rapid.

I think it's telling.

Except it isn't.

It just popped into my head.

It doesn't mean anything.

All the other associations

had to do with some sort of trauma.

I don't have any trauma around clowns.

When you think about clowns,
what comes up?

John Wayne Gacy.

The Joker, Pennywise.

All negative representations.

Uh, 'cause clowns are awful.

So it's possible that you
suffer from coulrophobia,

which is the irrational
or extreme fear of clowns.

My "fear of clowns" is-is
neither irrational nor extreme.

But you do have very strong
feelings about clowns.

So how are you coping with that?

I avoid the circus.

_

_

Okay, sir, I'm gonna get help to you.

Can you give me your address?

I-I-I can't. I don't...
I don't, I don't live here.

I'm renting this condo for a work trip.

(MAN COUGHS OVER PHONE)

Oh, my God, there's so much smoke.

Okay. I need you to
stay low and stay calm.

I'm Dave. Can you give me your name?

- JORDAN (OVER PHONE): Jordan.
- DAVE: Okay, Jordan.

Let's forget the address.

Can you recall for me any cross streets,

Anywhere you might have gone
for a takeaway?

- A takeout?
- JORDAN: Yes.

I get coffee every morning
at Capitol Roasters.

DAVE: Brilliant. I see it.

That puts you on Congress.

JORDAN: That's right! That's right!

It's the tower across the street.

Can you tell me what unit you're in?

JORDAN: I'm on the fifth floor,

but I'm not in my unit.

I'm in a hallway.

Okay, then let's get you to some stairs.

That's what I'm looking for
but I can't find it.

I can barely see with all this smoke.

Alright. I am pulling up
the building blueprints.

But for now, I need to get you
behind a closed door

and away from that smoke.

Do you think you can find your way back

to your unit for me?

The ceiling's falling! (COUGHS)

I don't know where I am and
now I'm really turned around.

DAVE (OVER PHONE): Okay. Okay.

I want you to start banging on doors.

Let's see if we can find someone
to let you inside.

Hello!

Hey! Open up!

The building's on fire!

Hello!

Help! Please, I need help!

Dave, the building's mostly empty.

- DAVE: I understand, Jordan.
- (COUGHS)

Okay, I've got the building
blueprints in front of me.

Tell me what unit you are
standing in front of right now.

(COUGHS) .

Okay, excellent, excellent.

There is a set of stairs to the left

around the corner.

I need you to stay low

and head that direction.

Uh... (COUGHS)

I can't go that way.
It's all on fire now.

Uh, Jordan, uh... change of plan.

It looks like there is a workout room

across the hall down to the other end.

With a little luck,

we're not gonna need
a key to get in there.


(COUGHING)

JORDAN: I found it!

Okay, get inside. Close that door.

(ALARM BLARING)

JORDAN: Oh, God. Alright. I'm in.

The air's a little better in here.

It's about to get even better.

There are some windows
on the north side of the room,

so I want you to take something
heavy and smash those windows.

JORDAN: I-I don't see any windows.

DAVE: Um, the north side
of the room, Jordan.

Three big bay windows.

But there aren't any. Just walls.

No, no, no. No, they're
right here on the blueprint.

Jordan...

are you absolutely sure
there are no windows?

Yeah, I'm telling you, no windows!

The smoke's coming in.

(PANTING) Dave, what do I do?

Gym, gym, uh, gym.
What else is in a gym?

Um... Jordan?

Are there water coolers?

JORDAN (COUGHS): Yes.

Towels. What about towels?

Yeah, they have, they have both.

Good. Good.
We are going to create a defensive space

to keep you safe
until first responders arrive.

So what I need you to do
is start wetting those towels.

Take the first towel
and cover your mouth

and with the others,
we're gonna stuff them under the door


to stop that smoke.

Hey, Rescue is three minutes out.

He's on the fifth floor.
He's not gonna make it.

(KEY CLACKS)

How we doing, Jordan?

JORDAN: The door's gettin' really hot.

(GROANS) The towels,

they're catching on fire!

Okay. I need you
to step away from that door

as far as you possibly can.
Keep your face covered.

Are the firefighters close?

Any second now.

JORDAN: So they're not here yet?

They are coming as fast as they can,

and they know exactly where to find you.

They're not gonna make it in time, Dave.

(VOICE BREAKING): Fire's coming in.

Oh, God, so this is it.

No, no, no, no, Jordan, this is not it.

- We are not giving up.
- (JORDAN BREATHING HEAVILY)

JORDAN: I wasn't even
supposed to come on this trip.


I volunteered.

My wife said, "Go, have fun."

My two kids hugged me goodbye.

(JORDAN BREATHING HEAVILY)

(CRYING) I'm...

I'm never gonna see 'em again.

(SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE)

(WEAKLY): I hear sirens.

I need you to hang on in there, Jordan.

JORDAN (BREATHES HEAVILY): Dave?

Yes, Jordan.

Thanks for trying.

(FLAMES ROARING)

(BEEPS)

(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING)

(GRACE SIGHS)

GRACE: Hey, Dave.

Hello, Grace.

You okay?

Yeah.

You know, no matter
how many people we lose here,

it never seems to get
any easier, does it?

I wouldn't know, actually.

Never lost anyone on a call before.

Really?

- In all your years on the job?
- Yeah.

Guess luck's always been on my side.

Streak over, then.

Well, you know, Emergency Services,

they offer counseling / .

Yeah, I appreciate it.
I think I'd just rather

get out of here, to be honest.

Do you have anybody you can call?

Oh, yeah, my brother's in Leicester,

so he'll be awake in about six hours,
so maybe I'll FaceTime him.

I mean, you...

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS) Why don't you,

why don't you come
over for dinner tonight?

Tonight? No. No, no.

Couldn't possibly put you out.

Well, no, you wouldn't
be putting us out.

- We'd be happy to have you.
- Grace...

You have enough to worry about

on the home front with a little baby.

And you don't need to be
fretting about me.

I'm gonna have Judd
make his potato salad.

(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

Just grab the rest of my things.

Okay.

(PANTING)

- Hey, babe.
- Hey.

Hey, uh, do you remember
where we kept my old fish t*nk?

Your...

TK, are we getting fish?

Nope.

CARLOS: Uh, what is that?

That is Lou, an alligator lizard,

and our new buddy.

And, uh, what is Lou doing

in a to-go box?

Oh, this is from lunch.

I put him in here after we
dug him out from the guy's leg.

What guy's leg?

I was on a call today.

He was buried in there pretty good.

You brought a flesh-eating
reptile into our home?

No, he wasn't eating it.

He was just... hangin' out.

Anyways, after we rescued him,

we brought him to Pathology
to make sure he wasn't diseased.

- CARLOS: Mm-hmm.
- Which he wasn't, by the way.

He's adorable, isn't he?

Maybe to another lizard.

You're gonna love him. You'll see.

Besides, you wanted a pet.

Yeah. To, you know, pet.

I don't want this thing
anywhere near me.

That's fine.
I'll take care of everything.

I'll feed him,
I'll set up his basking lamp.

You won't have to lift a finger.

Good. Because I'm afraid I'd lose it.

Think your fish t*nk is in the garage.

Excellent. Would you mind getting it?

(SIGHS)

And this is me not lifting a finger.

The potato salad is lovely.
Thank you, Judd.

I can't help but notice
you ain't really touched it.

It turns out that it's difficult
to enjoy something

even as lovely as this

after you've k*lled a father of two.

It was not your fault.

That man was on the fifth floor.

Grace said that whole place
was an inferno too,

so nobody's gonna save him.

I could have done more than

march him into a windowless tomb.

That, uh, that tater salad
that you're so fond of...

that ain't actually my recipe.

The fella that give it to me,
his name was Chef Parkland.

He was a...

He was one of my best friends...

and he was a husband...

and he was daddy to a little girl.

He was one of eleven

incredible firefighters
that we lost at the .

The Farm and Feed Factory
on Old Walker Road.

I-I remember that.

Yeah, on the drive over,

my job was to look at the facility maps

and blueprints.

Yet it never occurred to me

that a fertilizer factory

is basically a b*mb
just waitin' to go off.

Now, I thought that should have
been the first thing on my mind.

And, uh, I tortured myself
about that for weeks.

It was months, actually.

How did you forgive yourself?

I don't know if I ever did.

But my therapist said something

that made me feel a little better.

He said, "A hero ain't in the saves.

It's in the carrying on after a loss."

GRACE: Yeah, that's right.

And you're gonna carry on too, Dave,

because you are a hero, sir.

No, I'm not a hero.

GRACE: Yes, you are.

I see what you do every day.

Thank you. (CHUCKLES)

I think I needed
to hear that tonight. Hmm.

Thank you so much for inviting me over.

I think if it wasn't for you two,

I'd just be getting
sloshed off my trolley

watching old "Battlestar Galactica."

I didn't understand a word
that you just said,

but I do feel like maybe
we should have offered the man

a little something
stronger than iced tea.

You know, uh, actually I do fancy

a tipple, actually.

A...

Uh, your booze would be good.

- JUDD: Oh!
- Yeah.

- GRACE: Alright.
- Gotcha. You like bourbon?

I don't really like it.
I bloody well love it!

Oh. Uh-oh. Watch out.

(LAUGHTER)

You seem to be
in good spirits today, Owen.

OWEN: Oh, I am.

Watched a little movie last night.

"The Greatest Show on Earth."
Ever seen it?

Uh, with Hugh Jackman, right?

That's "The Greatest Showman."

"The Greatest Show on Earth,"

C.B. DeMille. .

Just happened to win the
Academy Award for Best Picture.

Two and a half hours
of glorious technicolor.

And the thing is filthy with clowns.

I mean, they're like of 'em in there.

Jimmy Stewart doesn't even
take his clown makeup off

for the whole thing.

And...

I loved it.

- Really?
- Yeah.

I might even watch it again.

So, does that sound like someone

who's suffering from clown-o-phobia?

Well, I never formally diagnosed you.

I merely suggested
that some triggering event

around the concept of clowns

might be at the root
of your anger issues.

But it's not because I do
not have a thing with clowns.

Are you sure about that, sonny boy?

(HEAVY BREATHING)

"Sonny boy"?

(EXHALES DEEPLY)

(ALARM BEEPING)

JUDD: Grace, make that stop.

(BABY BABBLING)

(DAVE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

Ah! Good morning, Grace.
Did you sleep well?

Uh, I did. Thank you.

Oh, thank goodness.

Charlie started mewling
at the cr*ck of dawn.

I was worried
she might have woken you up.

Ah. Um, well, I didn't hear any mewling.

Well, you have a seat.

I've got beans on toast on the go.

That'll be ready in just a moment.

(CHARLIE COOING)

Okay. Uh...

Dave, got a question for you.

Yeah, of course.

What are you still doing in my house?

When you went to bed last night,

Judd and I's little tipple

turned into two little tipples

and then three big ones and so forth.

Yeah, so...

I couldn't let him get behind
the wheel after all them tipples.

So I just told him to
crash out on the couch.

You know, um, you can
tell me your secret, Dave,

because you have turned
our squealing little gas monster

into a cooing cherub.

That's just a nip of antacid.
That did the trick.

What, you gave my child antacid?

As in, like, grown-up antacid?

Is there really such a thing
as grown-up antacid?

It's just calcium carbonate, isn't it?

Also, I don't think she has gas.
I think it's just reflux.

JUDD: Girl and me here, we've
been trying to cr*ck the crying code

for, what, couple months now,
he gets it night one.

It's amazing, ain't it, Grace?

Uh, it's something.

Yeah. You have no idea the kindness

that you've done us, man. Truly.

Well, can't say there isn't

a little bit of self-interest involved.

If I'm gonna be sleeping
on your couch for a week,

I would like to do it in peace.

- Did-did you say a week, Dave?
- Mm-hmm.

Yeah, the man's got
a plumbing issue at his house.

Mystery clog.

No one can find it.

No hot water until they do.

And they didn't try to snake it or...

(SCOFFS) Multiple times.

Well, you know,
as I was telling your husband,

I don't have to stay.
I don't wanna be a burden.

Don't be crazy, man.
You ain't no burden.

Is he, Grace?

I guess not.

("SLIPPERY PEOPLE"
BY TALKING HEADS PLAYING)

Oh! So sorry.

- Oh. Yeah.
- Beg your pardon.

Oh. Ran out of hot water
there at the end,

so you might wanna wait a few minutes

for it to replenish.

(GRACE SIGHS)

(DOORKNOB RATTLES)

Oh, dear.

♪ What about the time? ♪

♪ You were rollin' over ♪

♪ Fall on your face ♪

♪ You must be... ♪

Dave, did you bring your own coffee?

I did. French press. Coarser grind.

Okay. Because, you know,

we've got plenty
of coffee in the pantry.

Oh, I know. I just can't do
that freeze-dried stuff.

Life is too short for crap coffee.

Sorry. No offense.

Oh. None taken.

Good morning, Grace.

Can I offer you some bangers and mash?

Uh, I think I'm good with cereal today.

You're missing out.

I could've sworn we had some milk left.

Ah, I finished that off last night.

Just before bed.

A little bit of warm milk,
and Dave is closed for business.

♪ ...bottom to the top
Turn like a wheel ♪


♪ He's alright ♪

- ♪ See for yourself ♪
- ♪ The Lord won't mind ♪

- ♪ We're gonna move ♪
- Oh, my God.

♪ Turn like a wheel inside a wheel ♪

(LOUD CRUNCH)

♪ I remember when ♪

♪ Sittin' in the tub ♪

♪ Pulled out the plug ♪

♪ The water was runnin' out ♪

- (KNOCK ON DOOR)
- DAVE: Grace?

Thought I would suggest
that we carpool together,

but you seem to be running a bit behind.

Uh, no, you go ahead, Dave.
I still need a minute.

Nah, I'll wait and we can
take your car together.

If we don't save the planet, who will?

Yep.

Late again, eh?

♪ He's alright ♪

♪ How do you know? ♪

I'll just be in the car.

♪ He's alright ♪

♪ Love from the bottom to the top ♪

You "Inception" -ed me.

I "Inception" -ed you?

Yes. Ever since you had me doing

your stupid eye movement mumbo-jumbo,

I've been having nightmares
with clowns in them.

- Really?
- Yes, really.

You and your little bouncing
ball sent in the clowns.

I even had one where you were a clown.

It's infuriating.

I'm leaving your office

with more neuroses than I
had when I came in here.

I think we may have taken the cap off

something in your subconscious.

Well, I'm putting the cap back on

'cause things are getting in there

that weren't there before.

You seem angry.

I am angry. That's the whole point.

And you've got me talking about clowns.

No more clowns.

Hiya, kids. It's me, Zippy the Clown!

(CHEERING)

Now, are you ready
to meet my balloon circus?

KIDS: Yeah!

But first, who's our birthday boy today?

- It's me!
- Oh!

And what's your name, young man?

Darren!

Well, happy birthday, Darren!

Now, I bet you like...

(GASPS) ...giraffes.

Giraffes are my favorite animal.

- Oh!
- (HORN TOOTS)

(ZIPPY LAUGHS)

Okay, that is impressive.

Clown did his research,

Darren's favorite animal
really is a giraffe.

- Aw.
- Oh!

It's so good seeing Darren laugh.

He woke up this morning in tears

saying all he wanted for his birthday

was Ted to be here.

Just remind Darren that from now on,

he gets two birthdays.

No, I did.

He'd rather have his dad.

Why?

(TOOTS)

Oh, that is one awful giraffe.

(TOOTS)

Thank you, Zippy.

But it made Darren smile.

Now, before I make the hippo,

I gotta do the hippo dance.

- (KIDS CHEERING)
- (ZIPPY HUMMING)

(CREAKING)


- Oh. Oh.
- (GIGGLING)

- (GRUNTS)
- (KIDS SCREAMING)

(HORN BLARES)

Thank you for coming. We're this way.

I wanted Darren's th birthday
to be memorable.

- Not traumatizing.
- Well, don't worry.

We'll try to keep
the trauma to a mini... mum.

ZIPPY: Don't worry, kids.

Zippy's just fine.

Cap?

I don't even let Darren play on it.

My ex-husband built it.

Always promised he'd add
a coat of sealant.

Classic Ted, all promises.

Cap, do you want us to check out
the integrity of that structure

so Medical can make an assessment?

- Yes, yes, do that.
- Yes, sir. Y'all heard him.

Uh, TK, Nancy,
stand by with the patient.

Will do, Cap.

Mommy, is Zippy gonna be okay?

Oh, yes, sweetie.

These firefighters
are gonna help him out

because they're very, very brave, okay?

That one looks scared.

Owen?

Owen?

- (OWEN PANTING)
- Owen?

Owen?

JUDD: It'll be alright, sir.
We'll get you out of there.

You alright?

Gee, thanks, Mr. Fireman.

- That'd be... real swell.
- TOMMY: Owen?

I wanna take your blood pressure.

Really, I'm...

I'm alright.

No, you are not alright.

I just need to catch my breath.

I think you're having a panic att*ck.

PAUL: This wood is a rotted mess.
It's no wonder you dropped in.

MARJAN: When he did,
he destabilized the whole thing.

No, I just...

I just need a minute.

JUDD: Chavez, you grab
the struts and cribbing.

- Is it the clown?
- (GASPS)

Have you ever been diagnosed
with coulrophobia?

Not officially.

Alright. You gonna pass out?

Fall down? Vomit?

I think I have it under control

if I just stand still here for a minute.

Please don't make this a thing.

- Everything okay, Cap?
- Yeah.

Yeah, your dad just wants to, uh,

observe from back there, you know,

wants to see the whole picture.



MAN: One, two, three.

Here we go.

Cap, we've ruled out a spinal injury.

His pulse is strong.
Everything seems normal.

Sir, are you in any pain?

Just a wittle-bitty-bit.

I'm Tommy. Can you tell me your name?

Zippy the Clown.

Unless that's on your driver's license,

I'm gonna need something

a little more official than that.

Fine. My name's Ted. Ted Rogers.

Wait, Ted?

RAE: He did not!

Hey, Juliana. Hey, Darren.

Dad?

Oh, so Zippy the Clown is...

Ted, what the heck are you doing?

TED: I couldn't miss Darren's big day.

With the custody stuff,

this was the only way you'd let me come.

It's like Mrs. Doubtfire,
but with a clown.

Ted, we agreed, two birthdays.

It's not the same, Juliana.

- But it is...
- JUDD: Alright, folks...

(STAMMERS) Can we do this
after we get him out?

That's, that's a good idea.

Cap, we're about ready to cut him out.

- Yep.
- Marjan, fire that up.

(CHAINSAW REVVING)

Ted, you idiot.

I know. I got what I deserve.

I screwed up so many times.

I'm so sorry, Juliana.

- Is he gonna be okay?
- I think so.

They'll take a better look
at him at the hospital.

Can I go with him?

That's not up to me, little buddy.

- DARREN: Mom, please.
- Oh. Uh...

Y'all are free
to ride with us if you want.

(HORN TOOTS)

Okay, We'll go with him.

Yay!

JULIANA: Come on, baby.

Little boys really do
love their daddies, huh?



Hey, baby.

Hey.

What's that?

Eggs for breakfast tomorrow.

I also got some peppers, some onion,

and mealworms.

Ugh. Please don't put them
next to the coffee beans.

Lou?

Hey, buddy. I got a big special...

surprise for you.

CARLOS: Hey, did you see there's
a new season of "Grand Designs"?

Uh, no.

No, I didn't.

Want to watch it tonight?

Unless you're busy,

and then I can just
stick with the magazines.

No, I'm good. I'm easy. I'm free.

- Yeah, I'm free.
- Cool.



Um...

Hey, babe.

Why don't we, uh...

Why don't we do that now?

Do what now?

TV thing.

But you haven't finished
putting the groceries away.

- Come here.
- What?

TK: You look so good today.

CARLOS: You got even the mealworms?

TK: Mm-hmm.

What?

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

TK, the thing was on me,

and you... you didn't say anything?

I'm sorry, I didn't wanna scare you.

How did it get out?

I don't know. It crawled.

Do not say crawled.

TK, where is it?

I don't know. These things are fast.

It could be anywhere.

(SOFT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

So how long is he planning on staying?

I guess until his plumbing
situation is figured out.

What kind of plumbing situation?

He says he's got some sort of
mystery clog in his pipes.

Oh, I remember the last time
we had a mystery clog.

It ended six months later
with a jackhammer

taking up the kitchen floor.

Did you say six months?

Mm-hmm. And an extra week

to put the floor back together again.

Listen, Dave is nice, okay?

He's nice and he's good with the baby.

And we've been saving on gas

'cause we've been carpooling to work.

(CLEARS THROAT) Okay.

So, uh, you mean to tell me
that this man is there

when you wake up in the morning

and next to you on the drive in to work

and sitting beside you
all day long at a desk

and then back in the car
with you on the way back home?

Okay, Tom, you know, it's not as bad

as you making it sound right now.

Oh, oh, no.
Then why are you here right now

still in your work clothes?

Is it? Oh... (LAUGHS)

Is he waiting for you in the car?

(SIGHS) Tommy.

No, I Uber-ed here, okay?

I just let him take the car.

- Gracie.
- I couldn't do it.

He sings show tunes comin' and goin'.

And I couldn't do "Surrey
with the Fringe on Top" tonight.

Okay, Grace.

You need to kick that man off
your couch and outta your house.

Yeah, Tommy, that's...
I would love to do that,

but I can't just kick him out
onto the street, T.

No, kick him out into a hotel.

Okay, listen.

Just hear me out, okay?

The real test of Christian charity

isn't when it's easy, right?

It's when it's hard.

Oh, don't do that.
Look at you and Julius.

- Okay. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- Okay?

You put all that anger and pain
and bad blood to the side

to welcome an unwanted guest
into your home.

The unwanted guest that cleans,

helps my girls with long division,

and is out right now
with them at a movie.

He cleans, Tommy?

Mm-hmm. My point being that Julius

isn't exactly taxing
my Christian charity.

And, listen,
I'll tell you something else.

- Listen to me. Girl.
- Sure. Yep. Yep.

You are not Jesus. Okay?

You need to relax your standards
right here just a little bit.

- (KNOCK ON DOOR)
- Oh, Tommy...

- Yep?
- Howdy, y'all.

Oh, hey, Juddie.

Oh, that was fast, sweetheart.

Yeah, there was no traffic.
There's no rush.

I just need, like, ten minutes.

(JUDD SIGHS)

Uh, where's Charlie?

She's with Uncle Dave.

(GRACE SIGHS) Let's go.

- (MOUTHS)
- JUDD: Go? Ah...

Dave?

Ah! You're home.

Dave, where's my child?

Sleeping peacefully in the crib.
I just put her down.

Oh, so she's fine.

Oh, she loads better than fine.

What does that mean?

My friends, I have some big news.

As of one hour ago,

Charlie is officially bipedal.

Okay. So what you're
saying is our daughter

took her first steps and we missed it?

Oh, no. Not to worry.
You didn't miss a thing.

I caught each and every moment

of Charlie's
first vertical foray on video.

Uncle Dave to the rescue.

DAVE (OVER PHONE): Come to me, Charlie.

Charlie, come to Uncle Dave.

You wanna come towards Uncle Dave?

Wait, wait. Let me get a good angle.

Let me get a good angle for Mum and Dad.

Oh, yes! You're doing it.

(GASPS) Oh, you're really doing it!

Good girl!

That's fantastic!

Good girl. Come to me, Charlie.

Come to me, come to Uncle Dave.

What a moment.

It seems that, in my excitement,

I may have accidentally
flipped the camera.

Well, that's unfortunate, isn't it?

Isn't it?

(WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

- He's gotta go, don't he?
- Yeah, I think it's time.

So what are you gonna tell him?

DR. PATT: So, Owen, how would
you like to start today's session?

With an apology.

Turns out I'm terrified of clowns.

I see. And what changed your mind?

A close encounter with one.

I, uh...

I am a chloraphobe. I'm chlorophobic.

Coulrophobic.

Chlorophobic is a fear of chlorine.

Oh, well, can't say
I'm a fan of that either.

You should be proud of yourself, Owen.

It takes a lot of courage
to admit something like that.

Thank you.

DR. PATT: And have you been
able to give any more thought

to what might be
the cause of this phobia?

Yes.

In fact, I think I know
exactly where it came from.

- DR. PATT: Is that so?
- Mm-hmm.

So I told you that
in one of my nightmares,

you were a clown?

DR. PATT: Yes, I recall.

Yeah, but I didn't
tell you what you said.

You called me "sonny boy."

And that phrase has
some significance for you?

There's only one person in the
world that's ever called me sonny boy.

My father.

You've never mentioned him in here.

What can you tell me about him?

Not much.

Haven't seen the man since I was .

And are you comfortable
sharing what happened

when you were ?

He abandoned the family.

Do you remember how you felt
when your family separated?

Shame.

Terror.

Rage.

Am I to assume
that you never got the chance

to tell your father how you felt?

No, no, I...

I don't even think I was aware of it.

And, um...

I've never talked
to anybody about it until...

just this moment.

And-and how does that feel
to finally say it out loud?

Some relief, I guess.

Frankly, not as...
as much as I would like.

DR. PATT: And why do you think that is?

Well, saying it out loud
doesn't change what happened.

Doesn't change the fact that I...

don't have any relationship
with him to this day.

DR. PATT: Well...

Then maybe I'm not the person
you need to say it out loud to.

- BREE: Good night, Grace.
- You too, Bree. Drive safe.

(SIGHS)

Okay, Lord...

I pray You forgive me
for what I'm about to do.

(SIGHS) I just ask that You give

Dave the strength to receive this

and to be able
to stand on his own two feet.

Okay.

(CLEARS THROAT)

Hey. Um, you about ready?

Oh, yeah.

Uh, almost finished, Grace.
Just give me one moment.

Yeah, yeah, sure. You take your time.

(SIGHS) Actually, Dave, um...

I think we should talk.

Honestly, um, I'm glad
to hear you say that because...

I do too.

- Oh, you do?
- Yeah.

I want to preface this by saying

that I am deeply grateful
for the hospitality

that you and your family have given me.

I know you're coming from a good place

and it's been a wonderful experience,

but it does feel a little bit...

smothering?

- Smothering?
- Well, no.

That's-that's not the right word.

Uh, what I mean is, um,

the family togetherness

is-is just a little bit suffocating.

- Yes.
- Okay.

Yeah, that-that means the same thing.

Right. What I'm trying to say is
I crossed the Atlantic

to escape my family togetherness.

So really, it is on me.

And I should have turned down

that initial invitation to dinner.

But I didn't because I thought

that you didn't want me to say no.

And then Judd so graciously offered me

the space on the couch.

And I didn't wish to disappoint
him in the same way

I don't wanna disappoint you, 'cause...

Argh!

Just, I can't take anymore.

Sorry... if that came out wrong.

Uh, no.

How could it? Um...

Listen, Dave, I was just
trying to be of some service.

You lost a caller
and you were hurting, so I...

DAVE: Yeah, I did.

But then I found out it wasn't my fault.

Yeah, yeah. No, of course, it wasn't.

No, I mean,
it literally wasn't my fault.

Turns out the flat owners
were doing some remodeling,

and they didn't put the permits in,

and they didn't take
those new papers to the city.

And so the blueprints
weren't in the system.

So greed is to blame, not me.

Oh. So then when did you find this out?

Oh, like the, the day after.

So why didn't you say anything?

Because you and Judd seemed like

you were enjoying having a project.

Uh, I didn't know
how to bring it up anyway.

Well, it's out there now, isn't it?

That boil has been lanced.

So I think I'm just gonna go
back to my place tonight.

But hold on. I'm-I'm sorry.

So what about your plumbing issue?

Well, I think I can get by
without a little hot water for now.

In fact, I like my showers quite brisk.

Oh. Okay.

I-I mean, I just wouldn't have known

the way you ran through our hot water.

Well, you might wanna
look into upgrading,

uh, because I suspect
you have a tiny t*nk.

Tsk. We will do that.

Yeah.

You're not angry, are you?

No, I'm-I'm not angry at all.

No hard feelings?

No, no hard feelings.

Ah! That is why they call
her Amazing Grace,

ladies and gentlemen.

Uh...

Have a lovely evening.

You too, Dave.

Yes.

That was a lot of strength
You gave him, Lord.

Like a whole lot.

(LAUGHS)

I appreciate you, though.

(SIGHS)

CARLOS: Oh. Hey.

Were we robbed?

No, I was looking for Lou.

Oh.

I got him.

You got him?

Is he...

What? No, I didn't k*ll him.

- He's right in there.
- Oh. Lou!

I found him by the desk lamp.

I guess he was basking.

Oh, my God, babe.

But... I thought you hated him.

CARLOS: I do.

But...

I love you.

And I love how big your heart is

for bringing in strays.

I love you too.

(SIGHS)

We should bring him to the greenbelt

and set him free, right?

I'm begging you.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

- (DIALING)
- (EXHALES)

(LINE RINGING)

- WOMAN (OVER PHONE): Hello?
- Yes, um...

I'm-I'm trying to reach Walter Strand.

WOMAN: Oh, I'm sorry.
He's not available.


Is there a message I can give him?

Is there a message?
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