01x22 - Lotsa Luck

[bunniefuu]

( soft theme playing )

My, isn't Pepper the perfectionist?

I'll say. The girl is particular with her comedy props.

Hey! Comedy is a serious business.

Seems a shame to waste all Pepper's effort

on just another routine performance.

Anyone special coming to visit this week?

Looks like some orangutan,

who goes by the name "O.B." is scheduled for a visit.

Huh?

O.B.? That's a funny name.

Oh, it says here that O.B. is just his nickname.

He's known professionally as--

Old Bananas!

You know him? ( laughing hysterically )

Old Bananas is coming here? Wahoo! Yeah!

BOTH: She knows him.

I'm O.B.'s biggest fan!

♪ You think about All the things ♪

♪ That you love to do

♪ It all comes true

♪ You find a place You never knew ♪

♪ Where you're happy To just be you ♪

♪ We can be ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ Who we wanna be ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ At the Littlest Pet Shop You and me ♪

♪ We can be ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ Who we wanna be ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ At the Littlest Pet Shop You and me ♪

O.B.'s coming here? I can't believe this is happening.

Okay, Pepper, who is this "Old Bananas?"

Only the biggest comedy name in pet showbiz.

Oh, yes, I've seen him on TV.

Wasn't he on that sitcom called, uh, That's My, um, Something?

Orangutan!

That's My Orangutan.

A classic.

They're running it again on Planet of Pets Channel.

( gasps )

Old Bananas must have heard about me.

And now he wants to see my act.

O.B. taught me everything I know about comedy.

ANNOUNCER ( over TV ): Okay, everyone! Who's Your Orangutan?

CROWD & PEPPER: That's my orangutan!

PEPPER: Of course this was before pet watch-dog groups steered

TV networks away from doing any imitate-able behavior.

So...

( crowd laughs )

PEPPER: Nobody could touch Old Bananas at pratfalls...

...throwing pies or delivering classic comedy shtick.

ANNOUNCER ( over TV ): Hey, everybody, Old Bananas would like to know

if you file your nails.

Because he files his in the trash!

( laughing )

O.B. would like to wish you

one more thing...

lotsa luck!

PEPPER: Lotsa luck.

There isn't one day I don't think about O.B.

and all I've learned from watching him.

( sighs )

Well, now you'll get to meet him.

That's right!

And to get O.B.'s "lotsa luck" in person,

it's the ultimate showbiz seal of approval.

Blythe, could you get the hammock out of storage?

O.B. always rests on a rope hammock on TV.

Oh, and you'll come and watch my performance with him, right?

I wouldn't miss it.

So Pepper,

do you think O.B. will like the routine you've been working up?

No way!

It's not nearly good enough.

I can't just perform for O.B.

I've gotta shine!

( whoopee cushion blowing )

( mysterious theme playing )

Oh, there's that hammock.

( coughs )

Ugh, dusty in here.

What the-- Huh?

"Kung fu quilting."

Weird. What the heck is kung fu quilting?

Kung fu quilting master?

Anna T.?

Mrs. Twombly!

( gasps )

No way!

A little to the left. A smidge to the right.

Pepper, your perfectionism knows no restraint.

Restraint is no virtue in the pursuit of comedy.

Aah!

Who said that?

Someone I admire very much, and who I hope gives me

a big "lotsa luck" thumbs up.

So let me get this straight,

you believe that getting some kind of crazy endorsement

from a TV primate you've never even met will mean

you're a great comedian? Well, when you put it that way

it sounds almost silly. ( horn honks )

Uh, yeah.

But, it's not! Not at all.

I'm gonna get his thumbs up, "lotsa luck",

and then the world will be my toaster.

I think you mean oyster.

No, I can't stand seafood.

( soft theme playing )

( bell chimes )

Oh, I see we have a celebrity here today.

Old Bananas, indeed!

( gibbering )

Oh, my, and so talkative.

Back there is our day camp. You're gonna just love it.

Or I'll be a monkey's uncle.

( laughs )

Sorry, that joke bumps him.

I have no idea what that means.

Yes, that's right, O.B.

Just follow Penny Ling back to the day camp. Have fun!

Mr. O.B., we have someone here who is your biggest fan.

Hm. You don't say?

I do say.

Her name is Pepper and she's the funniest skunk I know.

Really? Well, we'll see about that.

This rubber chicken's fresh out of the box.

So let me "beak" it in.

( giggles )

See what I did there? I said, "beak" it in

instead of "break" it in, 'cause it's a chicken

and it has a beak.

Yeah. Okay.

( comical theme playing )

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To lay it on the line!

( drums sound )

You know,

I've never thought about the chicken's motivation before.

Yeah, it explains a heck of a lot.

Guys, it's a joke. It's not a philosophical discussion.

Must be a bad rubber chicken.

( clapping )

Ha.

( gasps )

I didn't know he was watching me rehearse!

And if you had, you might have been funny?

( dramatic theme playing )

O.B., we, and especially our very funny friend here,

weren't expecting you yet.

No! I was just working on my material.

Sure, sure.

I can't believe you're really here.

You must be Peppy.

Uh, Pepper. What did I say?

You said--

Yes, I'm Peppy, or Pepper, whatever you want to call me.

So honored to meet you sir-- Primate--

Oh, uh, your comedyship.

The bear tells me you're funny, Popper. We'll see.

All right, who's your orangutan?

ALL: That's my orangutan!

Ooh! You know it!

Whoops! Clumsy me.

Well, at least he's not perfect.

Wait for it.

CROWD: Ooh!

Everyone gets a souvenir.

Autographed personally by me.

( all chattering )

So, Poppy, pass me your bad rubber chicken.

How long do chickens work?

Around the "cluck".

( laughing )

Why did the chicken cross the road twice?

Because he was a double-crosser.

( all laughing )

What do a chicken and a grape have in common?

They're both purple.

Except the chicken.

( laughing )

Oh, he's so much funnier in person.

Yeah, he's k*lling me.

And that's how it's done, Patty.

( soft theme playing )

Huh. Looks like someone's quite a hit.

( all chattering )

Yeah.

Youngmee, I found these flyers

in an old trunk in the pet shop's storage room.

So I did a search,

and you won't believe what I found out about Mrs. Twombly.

Kung fu quilting? What the heck is that?

BLYTHE: It's a rare combination of manual quilting skills

performed with simultaneous kung fu action.

Okay. What does Mrs. T. have to do with it?

There was once an amazing woman,

who was not only the inventor of kung fu quilting,

she was its sole world-class practitioner.

She took her novelty act on the road, to global acclaim.

But what does all that have to do with--

( gasps )

O-M-G! It's Mrs. Twombly!

( upbeat theme playing )

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ She quilts you a blanket With time to spare ♪

♪ With kung fu fists flying Through the air ♪

♪ Her fingers are faster Than a swarm of bees ♪

♪ Her legs kicking around At ninety degrees ♪

♪ We say

♪ Meet Anna T, If you please! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Yeah! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah!

♪ Who's got the moves like You've never seen? ♪

♪ Kung fu quilting up Her new routine ♪

♪ Quilts made softer Than a summers' breeze ♪

♪ Strong enough to catch a dog And his fleas, we say... ♪

♪ Meet Anna T, If you please! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Yeah! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ She's so popular Downright jocular ♪

♪ Acts so amazing It's kung fu quilt-ocular ♪

♪ Patterns on squares Chopping through the air ♪

♪ Miss Anna T

♪ You can't compare!

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Yeah! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Meet Anna T, If you please! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Yeah! ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

( crowd cheering )

Whoa! That is crazy.

I can't believe she's never mentioned

anything about this before.

I've gotta ask Mrs. Twombly about this.

Whew! That O.B. is a tough audience.

What's the use performing for him?

He clearly doesn't think I'm funny.

Did you really think Old Bananas

would be just like he was on television?

Why wouldn't I? Everything on TV is real.

Right.

Well, Old Banana's just like anyone else.

And you can entertain anyone, right?

Yeah, you know, you're right!

I can make anybody laugh!

Why should he be any different?

I'm gonna make that guy laugh!

Right! I'm gonna win him over!

Right!

And you're gonna be my stage partner!

Right! What?

Oh, Mrs. T.! Mrs. T.!

I have to ask you about something.

Oh, my, Blythe, what is it?

Is it true that you invented kung fu quilting?

( sighs )

Well, I suppose everything winds up online, sooner or later.

It says you were the world class champion.

The key word is "were."

Really, Blythe, all of that belongs in the past.

But-- It was nothing,

and it was silly. ( phone rings )

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a pet shop to run.

Wow.

That's some masterful quilting, even without the kung fu-ing.

Sometimes I feel like a bowling pin,

and at other times, I feel like--

O.B.: Peppy!

Mind your props!

( groaning )

Ah! Oh.

( yawns )

Old Bananas sure is a tough nut to cr*ck.

I was thinking he's just a plain old nut.

Bite your tongue! He's a showbiz legend.

If he says I need to mind my props,

then I probably do.

I guess.

( soft theme playing )

Mrs. T., I just need to ask you one more thing.

What is it, Blythe?

How did you do it?

Oh, it was pretty easy.

I just sprayed that part of the window and then squeegeed.

No, I mean, how did you come up

with combining quilting with a martial art?

Like many things in life, it was serendipitous.

Seren-who-da-what now?

Well, it all started because I had an awful tummy ache.

The doctor said to lie flat for two weeks.

Turns out, he was a terrible doctor,

but I didn't know that yet, so I did what he said.

Lying there, I was so bored!

I had to do something to keep busy.

So I took up quilting.

But that wasn't enough either, oh, not by itself.

While laid-up I watched a lot of kung fu movies...

( making kung fu noises )

...and I loved the legwork.

So, as I was quilting,

I just started doing kung fu moves with both legs.

I didn't think much about it, at first.

I just did what came naturally.

See that leaf way up there, stuck on the brick?

Uh-- Oh, now I do.

( yells )

Whoa!

You still got it, Mrs. Twombly!

Well, thank you, dear,

but what I can still do is nothing,

compared to what I was capable of in my days

of kung fu quilting mastery.

I know! I read all about you

on weird-mixed-martial-arts- of-the-past.com.

But why did you quit?

Well, it wasn't all sunshine and peanut butter, Blythe.

Soon I had to defeat all challengers

to my title of kung fu quilting champion!

And I thrived on that fresh challenge...

( action theme playing )

( yells ) ( dings )

( crowd cheers )

Turning each new square-off into a benefit

for local charity, until...

( crowd gasps )

( yells )

( yelling )

( crowd cheering )

Ooh!

( crowd gasps )

I pulled a major tendon.

I decided it was time to call it quits.

NEWSCASTER: Kung fu quilting master Anna Twombly

announced her retirement, stunning the world.

And nothing else happened today.

ASTRONAUT: One small step for man,

one giant leap for mankind.

It's funny that retiring my act had such an effect.

No one wanted to ever hear about kung fu quilting again.

So you just walked away from all that?

Well, it was more like a limp.

I'm afraid "all that" is in the past, dear.

Wow.

( drumroll )

Welcome, friends and honored guest.

Glad you could make it on such a warm afternoon.

And I've got the perfect thing for a hot, sunny day.

Instant shower! Ya-cha-cha-cha!

( plays )

One down, to go!

Ow!

A banana split!

Ha! Whoo-hoo! Yeah!

( horn honks )

Ta-da!

Whoa. Ta-da!

( upbeat theme playing )

( panting )

( snoring )

Oh!

Mrs. Twombly, can you explain something?

All right, how about the theory of relativity?

That's always fun.

No, I want to know how you could have been

the toast of the planet, then just give it all up?

Easy, dear.

Those Achilles tendon injuries hurt like the dickens.

But what about after it healed?

You could've gone back.

Blythe, I was good at kung fu quilting--

Good? You were the best!

But the moment I opened Littlest Pet Shop,

I knew that I found my true calling.

But you were, like, mega-famous.

But I wasn't happy. You see,

I learned that I no longer have to do kung fu quilting.

I've done it.

Well, I'd sure like to learn it.

And I bet my friends would too.

Is that so?

Oh, I'm late.

See you later!

What'd I miss?

Pepper's gone through all her props,

without much success.

She's in uncharted territory now.

Whew! Huh?

( uplifting theme playing )

( breathes deeply )

Hey, have you guys ever noticed how someone walks

when they've an itch that's drivin' them crazy,

but they can't reach it?

( groaning )

( laughing )

( laughing )

( Pepper groaning )

That's so true!

Thank you! Thank you!

Oh, ha. Almost fell for the oldest gag in the book.

( whistles blows )

In the words of Old Bananas himself, "Ha!"

( all laughing )

( laughing )

Now that's minding your props, Peppy!

Take a bow.

You've earned it.

Come on! Give it up for Peppy!

( all cheering )

Yeah!

How about that?

Peppy thinks I taught her everything she knows.

Well, now she's funnier than me!

But I thought you were disappointed in me.

Naw.

That was just my way of preparing you

for the rigors of showbiz,

but seeing you bring down the house just now

with that clever ending twist,

I think you're ready, Pepper.

He knows my name.

Course I do, kid.

Come on, come here.

( knocking on door )

Oh, my caretaker's here.

Time to go.

Oh, and one last thing,

lotsa luck!

( sighs )

Huh. So how does it feel to finally get O.B.'s approval?

You know, it was okay,

but not as good as just gettin' a laugh from all of you.

ALL: Aww.

Alrighty, here we go, kids.

Kung fu quilt! That's it!

Raise that leg, Jasper.

Stitch that square, Sue.

And kick and stitch and kick and stitch

and kick and stitch.

( soft theme playing )

( upbeat theme playing )

♪ We can be ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ Who we wanna be ♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ At the Littlest Pet Shop You and me ♪