08x05 - Third Time's a Charm

[bunniefuu]

[ electricity crackles ]

[ creature howls ]

Hey! Watch the architecture!

[ grunts ] Puny Friedkin University people!

Behold the mighty Mina-toga!

Really? [ grunting ]

[ roars ]

[ shouts ] [ grunts ]

[ plop! ]

The star quarterback of Melville City College

trying to steal our school mascot before the big game!

And I would've gotten away with it, too,

if it hadn't been for Friedkin's meddling super-heroine!

[ cheers and applause ] [ camera shutters clicking ]

[ clicking continues ] [ all murmuring ]

Where'd she go?

Miss Tennyson! Where's Lucky Girl?

Sorry, Professors, did you say something?

[ up-tempo music playing ] I can't believe this,

I mean, this is ridiculous,

[ sighs ]

[ Zed panting ]

[ Zed whimpering, burps ]

You can't sit here moping forever, Kevin,

You're right, Let's go for a ride,

Oh, wait -- I don't have my car,

I've searched the entire universe dozens of times,

I don't know what Charmcaster did with it,

One more time? Please?!

[ gasps ] You found it?!

That's my girl! Mwah, mwah, mmm!

Okay, reunion's over, We should get out of here,

Oh, thank you, babe, [ rumbling ]

[ gasping ]

[ grunts ]

Gwendolyn!

Oh, goody,

♪ Ben ♪ ♪ He's a kid, and he wants to have fun ♪

♪ But when you need a superhero ♪

♪ He gets the job done ♪ ♪ Ben ♪

♪ With a device that he wears on his arm ♪

♪ He can change his shape and save the world from harm ♪

♪ When trouble's taking place ♪

♪ He gets right in its face ♪

♪ Ben ♪

♪ When lives are on the line ♪

♪ It's hero time ♪ ♪ Ben ♪

What's happening here, Charmcaster?!

See?! I told you Gwen would take our bait,

[ sighs ] What do you mean it was your idea?

[ whirring ]

Charmcaster: Oh, please!

I have no interest in fighting you,

Not like you have a chance here anyway,

[ gasps, shouts ]

Now you kids play nice in there,

Kevin: It's got to be Charmcaster!

Who else has it in for Gwendolyn?

Darkstar, Hex, Adwaita,

Okay, who has it in for her lately?

We did not exactly part ways with Charmcaster

on the best of terms,

Yeah, she stole my car!

Oh, humans are so barbaric,

Why can't you be civil to one another?

Uh, Ben, you got a little something

right there,

Hold still, [ grunting ]

Agh! Wait! What are you doing?!

Skurd: See? Just as I said, barbaric,

Kevin, this is Skurd,

the Slimebiote that has taken up residence on the Omnitrix,

And won't leave!

Speaking of leaves, you getting all this, buddy?

[ zip! ]

[ whistling ]

Aah! Unh! Huh?

[ grunts ]

Don't move, Adwaita!

I'm a lot more powerful now than the last time we fought!

[ gasps ]

Your posturing, while adorable,

is quite pointless, lovely Gwen,

Eradico!

Portalus projectum!

Beardy mortal -- Nada!

What did you do to my powers?!

This is not any of our doing, Gwendolyn,

Speak for yourself, Uncle Hex,

Charmcaster is your niece,

Dare not speak that wretched name in my presence!

Or what -- You'll yell even louder?

I shall yell as loudly as I wish,

whenever I wish!

It is good to see you again, Gwendolyn,

I'm only sorry that it's because you are

now trapped here forever, too,

There's got to be a way out! All: There isn't!

Did you try -- All: Yes,

Well, how about -- All: Yes,

Look, we each know a lot about magic,

If we put our heads together,,,

His head is on fire,

Yours is a skull,

Come on! Work with me, people!

I refuse to divulge even one shred of my knowledge of magic

to such unworthy recipients as you!

Good, Maybe we'll be

spared the sound of your voice for a change,

[ sighs ] I'd pity anyone who got stuck with one of you

as a college roommate,

Thank you, sir,

Big exam -- Study, study, study,

Hmph, which subject?

Math, History, Astrophysics,

Mm-hmm,

Gonna be a while, dude,

Nothing to see here,

Yeah, you know, like they say,

a watched pot never boils,

[ rake scraping ]

[ sighs deeply ] This is like looking for a needle in a stack of books,

And that creepy guy is giving me the creeps,

[ rake scraping ]

Perhaps you could try to turn into Brainstorm

to read more efficiently,

Great idea!

[ beep ]

Even better! [ zip! ]

Well, find anything?!

Huh? Oh, no, I got bored,

I'm reading an article on the new "Space Sumo Slammers" movie -- In D!

Why don't you ask the university employee

with so much free time on his hands for his assistance?

Yeah, Not,

Sir, I do not suppose you have any interest

in helping us look through all of these books about magic for --

Ha! Did somebody say "magic"?!

Pick a card, any card!

That is not the kind of magic to which I was referring,

Just do it, Rook, Maybe he'll finally get lost,

[ sloop! Tink! ]

Hmph, okay, look at it, memorize it, show it to your friends,

but do not let me see it! This is imperative!

[ zip! ] Ha, place it back in the deck,

Abracadabra, alakazam!

[ chuckles ]

Is this your card?!

[ laughs ] How cool was that?!

You cannot be serious,

It's just a card trick, Ben,

How can you possibly be impressed by that?

You have seen real magic,

Eh, real magic, whatever,

but that was your card, Rook! I mean, how does he do it?!

A magician never reveals his secrets,

[ rake scraping ]

[ clock chimes ]

For a grounds keeper, you sure do love magic,

Ha, what's not to love?!

Pulling rabbits out of top hats,

sawing ladies in half, oh, it's all such fun!

Yes, delightful,

People, am I the only one

who cares that Gwendolyn is still missing?

Gwen can take care of herself,

Then why isn't she back yet? How about,,, Bezel?

Yeah, we know,

He has not been seen in many centuries,

There is some evidence to suggest he never even existed,

Dude, just stick to raking,

[ electricity crackling ]

[ both gasp ] Huh?

[ crackling continues ]

Where's Gwen?! Did someone mention Bezel?

What have you done with Gwen?!

Say hello to my little friend,

Huh?!

"Hi! I'm Gwen!

I used to think I was so much better than Charmcaster,

but now, look, I fit in her purse!"

[ beep ] Big mistake, Charmcaster --

Way big! [ beep ]

[ grunts ]

Uh, or Shocksquatch!

Why do you even bother to call them out before you transform?!

Eh, I don't know, I've been asking myself that same question, eh?

[ electricity crackling ]

[ shouts ]

[ coughs ] Oh! Look out!

[ grunts ] Where is Zed?

I thought she was with you,

[ Zed whimpering ]

Stay right there, girl, Stay,

[ Zed yips ]

[ Zed panting ] Huh? Bad doggy!

[ Zed grunts ] [ screeches ]

You have her very well-trained,

Go and make me something cool to fight with! Hurry!

It's not what you said, It's the way you said it!

Oh, the blocks lobber, eh?

Oh, beauty!

Transformacio diestay!

For me?! Oh, you shouldn't have!

Oh, I so wish I could stay and play more with you boys,

but I'm afraid you must be going!

You, too, old man,

Exciase!

[ shouts ]

[ shouts ]

[ shouts ]

[ cicadas chirping ] [ zapping ]

No way she's squatting in Gwen's headquarters!

Patrium dacuritum!

[ grunts ]

[ gasps ]

[ creature roars ]

New plan!

Okay, new new plan,

[ creature growls ] Unh! Ohh!

New new new plan?

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh!

My magic library now!

Mine, mine, mine! [ giggles ]

How do you like that, huh?

[ scoffs ] Not you, Uncle Hex,

I meant Gwen!

I will not stop now -- Or ever!

Incoming!

[ all shouting ]

[ gasps ]

[ distorted ] Where are my charms,,,

Unh! ,,,of Bezel?!

Um, Gwendolyn, are you all right?

Oh, I'm better than all right,

I'm getting us out of here!

[ beeping ] Rook: She has surrounded the building

with some form of magic barrier,

I don't care, man! She's got Gwen!

[ Zed whimpering ] And the charms of Bezel,

Oh, she does? I've been wondering where they were,

This explains so much!

Would you mind explaining it to us?

[ laughs ] I'm sorry,

I assumed you knew by now,

I am Bezel,

the most powerful manipulator of magic

the universe has ever known!

[ cicadas chirping ]

Pick a card!

You're a janitor!

[ chuckles ] Custodial engineer!

It is highly unlikely that a magic user of such magnitude

would be raking leaves on a college campus,

Well, I tried raking leaves for the city, but they weren't hiring,

A guy's got to make a living,

Not a lot of job security in the magic biz,

Yeah,,, No,

Hmph! First rule of showmanship --

Razzle-dazzle 'em,

[ whirring ]

Better?

[ whirring ]

You chose this building at this school

to house your library for a reason, Uncle Hex,

Yes, it does have a nice view,

[chuckles] When you can see it,

Ugh, what does that have to do with magic?!

[ clock ticking ] I spy with my little eye,,,

[ ticking continues ] Aha!

Oh, thought you could hide this from me, Unky-wunky?

Ooh-ooh, are you gonna be sorry I found it,

[ whirring ]

Okay, Bezel,

if that's who you really are,

get us in the library,

Oh, easy-peasy, Now, everyone join hands and close your eyes,

[ cicadas chirping ] Your spell isn't working, pal,

Spell? Oh, no, uh,

that was just a team-building exercise,

[ groans ] [ Zed grunts ]

Mr, Bezel, this is an extremely urgent matter,

If you're the most powerful wizard ever,

can't you just make Charmcaster disappear or something?

Eh, probably, Now pick a card!

Dude, the library's that way,

Mm-hmm, so it is,

If you can do real magic, what's with all the card tricks?

Blah! Real magic!

I hate real magic!

Want to turn a pumpkin into a carriage? Poof!

Broke your mother's vase? Zap -- good as new!

There are no rules! It's all just willy-nilly!

While magic tricks are nothing but rules,

Mm-hmm, it's about the misdirect,

All: Huh?! [ zap! ]

[ zapping! ]

All right! Excellent! [ laughing ] Yes!

You see, this is why magic is malarkey,

You wanted into the library, I got you into the library,

Where's the fun in that?

Come on, pick a card!

[ lipstick squeaking ]

Cabals and stratagems,

plots and ploys,

powerful sorcerers turned into toys!

The ancient, the classic once proud but now tragic!

Come bring me the soul of the father of magic!

I summon the mighty Bezel!

[ rumbling ] [ poink! ]

Oh, I'm being summoned! [ sighs ]

[ grunting ]

Oh, the summoning continues!

You called?!

Here, pick a card!

[ ting! ]

Now I'm not only in control of the charms of Bezel

but also Bezel himself!

[ laughing evilly ]

I did it! I actually did it!

I am the most powerful sorceress there is!

[ squeals ] Ooh-ooh-ooh, goody!

[ Zed growling ] Easy, girl, Whoa!

[ Zed barking ] Why does Zed keep behaving like this?

Ben: Maybe the totems have some weird effect on her?

She is an alien, I am an alien,

Yeah, but you're always weird,

[ Zed whimpering ]

[ beep ]

Hiyah! [ screeches ]

[ shouts ] Unh!

[ high-pitched voice ] Ben, you have to get Charmcaster

to reach into her bag!

[ grunts ] Unh!

Gwen: Hello? Can anybody hear me?!

[ Zed barking ]

[ Zed barking ]

What has gotten into you, Zed?! Agh!

[ creature roars ]

[ creature roaring ]

[ creature roars ]

Gwen: Ben?! Kevin?!

Rook?! Anybody?!

[ creature roars ]

Kickin Hawk: Unh! [ Zed whimpers ]

[ Zed growling ]

[ Zed panting ]

Ew!

It's no use!

Zed's the only one who can hear us!

[ poink! ] Gwen?! Ben?!

You have such a cute, little chipmunky voice, Gwen!

Sorry -- Gwendolyn, Gwen: Pay attention, Ben!

You have to make Charmcaster reach into her magic bag!

How? I don't know! Think of something!

Skurd: We're doomed, [ sighs ]

[ creature roaring ]

Kickin Hawk: [ grunts ]

[ screeches ]

Ugh, hurry up and finish them already!

[ gasps ]

[ exhales sharply ]

Bactusum, magnustu, predraco!

[ twinkling ]

[ growls ]

[ laughing evilly ]

Whoa, Our problem just got bigger!

[ roars ]

[ grunts, squawks ]

[ shouts ]

[ growls ]

Are all your enemies so melodramatic?

Less snark, more help

before we both end up barbecued!

I shall be,,, Sir Kickin of Hawk!

That's still being snarky,

But I'll let it slide this once,

Charmcaster, prepare thy butt for kicking!

[ screeches ] [ growls ]

[ grunts ] [ roars ]

[ shouts ]

[ grunts ]

Yes, my car's still here! Cover me!

[ creatures roaring ] [ r*fle cocks ]

[ creatures roaring ] [ shouts ]

[ screeches ]

[ engine revving, tires squealing ]

This is for stealing my ride!

[ tires screech ] Magic,

Charmcaster: [ growls ]

[ chuckles evilly ]

I've beaten the most powerful magic users

in this world and all others!

And you honestly think you have a chance?

You've got no magic, Ben Tennyson!

Not true! Pick a card!

Or maybe you'd rather pick a,,, Totem!

[ scoffs ] Holding my Bezel totem doesn't make you magic,

Maybe, But this does!

Abracadabra, alakazam!

Impossible! You couldn't --

Show me your hands again!

Check your bag!

No! This is impossible!

You don't know any magic!

[ growls ]

[ whirring ]

[ shouting ]

[ screeches ] No!

Nooooooooooo!

[ Zed barking ] [ beeping ]

[ barking continues ]

Ben: Gwen, can you hear me?!

Gwendolyn?!

[ all shout ]

Oh! Ugh! It's ridiculous!

Oh, your foot is in my face!

Did you taste that?

[ sighs ] Ugh!

Thanks, Girl,

Bezel! [ plop! ]

[ laughs ] Great magic trick, Ben!

[ clears throat ] Excuse me!

I'm fine, by the way,

Don't everybody ask at once,

No, no, no!

I am the ultimate magic user -- Me!

I refuse to accept this temporary setback!

I will have the last laugh!

Ha! You hear that, Tennysons?!

[ high-pitched laugh ]

[ grunts ] [ r*fle whirs ]

Ohh, unh!

We couldn't use magic ourselves in there,

but I could create a trap activated

by Charmcaster's own magic

when she touched it,

Yes, yes, you succeeded where we failed,

Wonderful,

Charmcaster: Tell me how you made that totem disappear, Ben!

Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!

Hmph! Clever conjurer, that Gwendolyn --

Misdirection and magic,

[ chuckles ] Clever, Very, very clever,

Darling! I've been so worried about you, Hex,

How have you been? Where have you been?

And why didn't you take me with you?

[ giggling ]

Elena,

Charmcaster: Let me out of here this instant!

Kevin: Good to have you back, "G,"

[ Zed mewling ] You know, I used to wonder

if Charmcaster and I could've been friends

under different circumstances,

and now I know that's true,

[ laughs ]

[ Zed howling ]