08x19 - Paradise City, Pt. 1

[bunniefuu]

♪♪♪

(Traffic whirs)

Paige:
(excited giggle)
what can I say, marco,

This is my life.

Paige michalchuk,
hollywood stylist.

Swimming pools,
movie stars...

Mmm.

You... Wanna visit?

Um...

This month isn't the best;

Work is insane.

Hailey:
paige?!

(Gasps)
can you hold?

Client on the other line.

Paige!

(Door shuts)

Uh, is everything okay,
hailey?

How's my performance
in this episode?

Hailey: (on tv)
so I talked to mo and...

She said she saw you
at the holly

Last night with cody.

Man:
yeah.

It's reality tv, hailey.

It's great.
You're awesome.

Okay,
virgin mobile party.

Can you help me
with an outfit?

I knew that you would remember
I wanna be a stylist.

Were you thinking dress?
Maybe miu miu?

Does she have
a doggie line?

The outfit is for truffles?

(Dog whines)

Hailey:
you are the best
assistant ever.

Come on, truffles.

(Phone key beeps)

Marco?
You still there?

(Sighs) a visit right now
definitely won't work.

I know,
I'm disappointed...

(Whining)

(Disgusted)
too.

Ugh!

(Heavy, exasperated breath)

I'll talk to you later,
marco.

(Sharp exhale)
truffles!

♪♪♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

♪ If I hold out ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

♪ Yeah! ♪

♪ Oh! Oh! Oh! ♪

♪ Be the best ♪

♪ The best that I can be ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it ♪

♪ I can make it ♪

♪ I can make it through ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

Here are the keys
to that school bus.

Now, I want it in
tip-top shape

By the time the winter
break's over, 'kay?

No problemo, shep.

Shep trusts you
with a school bus?

I have given him no reason
not to...

Yet.

(Chuckles slyly)

Shep:
nothing to do
over the winter break?

Listen up!

Celebrity friend of degrassi,

Jason mewes, is holding
open auditions

For his new movie
"mewesical high."

Are you a star
waiting to be discovered?

Or a band
waiting for their big break?

Like the studz!

Oh yeah! Spend the winter break
in sunny california!

Movie stars!
Cool!

Anya:
how about you mia?
Gonna audition?

Nah. Oh!

But I'd love to meet
michael raye.

I hear he's the star
of the film.

You have a crush?

You do.
You love him.

No, I just like his movies,
okay?

Manny:
no vicious blot,
m*rder or foulness.

No unchaste action,
or dishonour'd step...

Mick:
stop!

Manny, didn't we talk about
you trying cry in this scene?

Well, i... I thought I'd
try something different.

And do you think that worked?

I'm not sure.

Hard to perform from a stance
of not being sure, isn't it?

Are you "not sure"
you want to be an actor?

No. I'm sure.

Mick:
are you "not sure"
you have the focus

To practice this craft?

No. I'm sure.

Are you "not sure"
you have any talent?

Because you're beginning
to make me wonder.

I'm sure.

Use that emotion.

Back to the scene.
Go!

No vicious blot,
m*rder or foulness.

No unchaste action,
or dishonour'd step

That hath deprived me
of your grace and favour!

(Class applauds)

Class...

Now you've seen how
a real actor takes direction

And commits to an emotion.

That's it for this morning.

Manny, a quick word.

(Low buzz of chatter)

Uh, one last thing...

Are you "not sure"
that I'm crazy about you?

I'm sure.

(Chuckles)

I was thinking dinner
at "la chasse,"

Then, uh...
"Dessert" at my place.

That sounds nice.
(Clears throat slightly)

Nice?

Well, more than nice.
Um...

It's just I was supposed to go
to this kevin smith lecture

With some of my friends.

(Sighs)
kevin smith?

Yeah, well, you know I did
that movie with him,

"Jay and silent bob
go canadian, eh?"

I sort of owe it to him
to show up.

Go. Have fun
with your friends.

Well, no!
I don't have to go.

I... I'd much rather
spend time with you.

So, um, dinner?
At "la chasse"?

Now I've come
to think about it,

I've just got
too much work to do.

(Hum of chatter)

Manny:
maybe I should leave.

Emma:
why? 'Cause mick wouldn't
want you here?

Everything I do,
I do because I want to.

Oh! So he doesn't control you?

You don't understand.

I feel great.
Like I can do anything

When I listen to him.

Mick:
is this seat free?

What are you doing here?

I figured if kevin smith
cast you

In one of his films,

He can't be half as bad
as I imagine him to be.

I'm really glad you came.

Man:
ladies and gentlemen,
kevin smith!

Kevin:
hello smithdale!

Crowd:
(wild cheering)

(Cheering, whistling
and applauding)

Give it up for jason mewes!

(Louder, wilder cheering)

Paige!

We're gonna be late
for truffles' reiki appointment.

(Palm pda button beeps)

Oh, I cannot believe it!

Auditions are happening
for the jason mewes movie

And I never got the call.

I, I actually know jason

From working on
a kevin smith movie.

I could maybe help you
score an audition...

If you promise to help me
launch my stylist career.

Deal.

Kevin:
how many people,
given the chance,

A, would you go back and relive
your high school experience?

And b,
what would you change?

Like, for me, I would eat
like , less twinkies.

Crowd:
(tittering)

You know, maybe get involved
in a sport of some sort,

Work off some of this chub.

What about you, sir?

If you had a chance
to go back to high school,

What would you change?

I would go back and snag
that girl that got away.

Kevin: really?
Mewes: I would.

That is a hell
of a poignant thing

For this dude to say.

But it really is
an excellent segway

For what I'm about
to tell you.

Which is,
mr. Jason mewes here,

Who we all know from jay
and silent bob,

Has written
and will be directing

His feature film debut...

Called "mewesical high."

These things I do
for you.

It's not that bad.

An goethe must be turning
in his grave.

I guess it is
kind of derivative.

Mick and manny:
(chuckle)

Are you guys
having a conversation?

Is it like "oh my god,

I totally got mariah carey
tickets!"

Hey, there's a show
going on up here,

So shhh... Shush!

Sorry, kevin.

You look familiar to me.

Mewes: oh snap!
Kevin: mewes!

Manny santos!

Kevin:
'kay, ladies and gentlemen,
this chick played abalone

In "jay and silent bob
go canadian, eh?"

Come on up here, manny.

(Crowd applauds and cheers)

How are you, manny?
I don't wanna sweat on you.

This chick is a brilliant,
brilliant actress.

Crowd:
(whistles and cheers)

Where have you been?!

Man, this fool has been
bugging me for months

To try to find you.

Your agent said
you're not doing auditions.

Why?

Manny:
I'm not allowed to audition
in the program.

Oh, at least that's what
her psycho professor said.

Kevin:
psycho profe-
I don't understand.

What do you mean?

That dude?

Look at the way he wears
his beard right here,

Like he's got a brazilian...
Like a landing strip.

Come on,
don't listen to him.

Look, this man is trying
to make a movie.

He's going to be casting it
at your alma mater,

Back at degrassi.

Studio has given this mama luke
full casting control.

He gets to cast
an unknown female lead.

Who are you?
An unknown female lead.

Look, I'll hold
a special audition for you.

Please come.
Really?

Kevin:
it's not a creepy thing,
it's a good thing.

Assistant:
mr. Smith, your car is ready.

Thank you, juicy.
I gotta go, man.

Well, excellent seeing you.

Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.

Don't be an idiot,
give her the package.

Yeah, look...

Audition package.
Please come.

You'll be great.
Seriously.

Thank you!

(Muted chatter)

(Bagpipes play,
hum of chatter)

Degrassi kids just have
this honesty

That hollywood kids lack,
you know?

Plus, the chicks
are really hot.

Mewes:
all right,
so you guys are the "studs"!

Peter:
uh, studz.

Mewes:
all right. New jersey.

Jason mewes,

Played by my little boy
right here, michael,

Believes that he will
successfully mack trixie

If he's a drummer
in a band.

So show me what you've got,
boys!

Peter:
one, two, three, four!

(Studz plays)

♪ Let's skip homeroom
I wanna see a bedroom ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Let's skip sex-ed
forget what your daddy said ♪

What do you think?

She's smokin'.

(Peter sings)

Dude, about the band!

Stop channelling me
and focus.

I can't, dude.
She's too hot.

(Song finishes)

Listen, you're gonna
have to go outside.

What'd I do?

You're battin' your eyes

And you're your flauntin'
your stuff.

You know what you're doing,
all right?!

You're distracting my boy.

Peter:
dude, that's my girlfriend.

Oh!
Then I apologize...

For what I'm imagining
right now.

Can we try again?

No. Please, don't,
all right?

My ears are
still ringin'.

Which is exactly
what I'm looking for.

Boys, you're the new
high school band

Of "mewesical high"!

See ya in l.a.!

Danny, peter and sav:
yes! Yes! Yeah! Hah!

(Laugh of disbelief)
crazy!

Man:
you know what? Just quit
this passive aggressiveness

That you've got going on
right now.

It's been like this
all day long.

You're passive!

Man:
I'm out here working
my butt off in the pool.

I do lap after lap...

I got you the audition!

(Excited squeal)

I did it!
I finally did it!

(Excited laughter)

Hailey: (singing badly)
♪ goin' to parties ♪

♪ Was your big thing ♪

♪ Taking every girl home
for a night ♪

(Frustrated grunt)
dammit!

♪ Made you feel
like a king ♪

♪ I was hoping
that I could change you ♪

♪ Be the one to tame you ♪

A musical is a stupid idea.

Who even watches those
anymore?

Like, everyone.

No one. Uh...
No one watches musicals.

Let's take it
from the top.

And this time,
don't let me forget a word.

Yes, ma'am.

♪ Goin' to parties ♪

♪ Was your big thing ♪

(Whining)

Manny:
take these;
I know them inside out.

Emma:
you are gonna be amazing.

(Manny's cell phone rings)

Hey, mick.

Mick:
you missed scene study.

You went to the audition
after all.

I just had to give it a sh*t.
I thought you'd understand.

Mick:
that had to experience failure
to know that I'm right?

You think I'm gonna fail?

There's no doubt
in my mind.

(Phone snaps shut)

Casting assistant:
ugh... Manny santos?

Mr. Mewes would like
to see you.

(Woodenly)
it just hurts so bad.

Okay...
(Clears throat)

(Overly dramatic)
it just hurts so bad!

Um...

(Stiff)
it just hurts so bad-ly...

(Softly)
to you with her.

(Angrily)
to see you! With her!

(Robotically)
to see you with her.

Maybe if we just try
the song again?

Michael raye:
dude, uh, I know
you're the director,

But, uh, I've done, like,
ten movies

And I'm pretty sure this broad's
never gonna get it.

Mr. Mewes,
you do have...

A plane to catch.

Maybe we should go.

Manny, I'll show the stuff
to the suits

And we'll see
what they say.

Sorry, kids,
that's it for now.

What?! I don't even
get to audition?

Dude, dude, I thought
she was my trixie.

I don't...

She is a hottie,
for sure,

But she totally sucked.

Hello, beautiful.

Guys, we're in a movie!
Hello l.a.!

Palm trees!
Girls in bikinis!

Sav:
oh, dude, do you think
jason mewes will introduce us

To ben affleck?

Sav:
have you guys seen "phantoms"?
That movie was the b*mb!

Mia: cool.
Michael: yeah.

Dude,
don't make a scene.

Mia:
I don't know...

Michael raye:
a beautiful,
smart girl like you?

Hey! I was telling
your girlfriend

How much I'd like
to get with her.

(Awkward laugh)
michael, stop it.

No, I was just saying
if I had a trailer here,

I'd invite her back there,
you know,

For a little private
casting session.

Students:
(shocked) oh!

Mewes:
dude, what's up?!

He said he was gonna
sleep with my girlfriend.

I was method acting, okay?
I was just channelling mewes.

You didn't have
to punch me!

I'm not working
with this chump!

Dudes, you're off the movie,
all right?

What, you're kicking me
off the movie

Just 'cause he's trying to mack
on my girlfriend?

Um, no,

Because you punched him
in his mouthpiece!

All right,
that's hollywood.

You're done.

Sav:
man, now I'll never
get to meet ben affleck.

(Car door shuts,
engine rumbles to life)

That was stupid.
A cattle call.

Jason mewes wasn't even there.
Let's go.

Uh, not until we talk
about my future.

What future?
You're a terrible assistant.

You should feel lucky
I didn't fire you ages ago.

Ugh! Where's my palm?

(Sighs)
I left it in the audition room.

Go get it.

No!

I'll fire you,

And then you can go back
to canada

A big fat failure.

(Truffles whines)

One palm,
coming up right up.

(Truffles whines)

Hailey: (to truffles)
how's my little girl?
You're a good girl!

Yes you are!
Who's the bad lady?

No one has that jersey girl
next door quality we need.

Casting agent:
maybe mewes found someone
decent in canada.

Robbie:
I'm the producer;
I'll decide who we cast.

Hi.

My boss was just here
and...

State your name
and the part you're reading for.

Excusez moi?

Robbie:
to the camera, please.
This is your chance.

Take it or leave it.

Of course.
Uh...

My name is paige michalchuk

And I'm here to audition
for trixie.

Manny:
what was I thinking?

I sucked.

Well,
at least you tried.

Well, I shouldn't have.

Mick was right,
I'm not ready.

(Computer beeps)

Kelly:
is that your computer?

Ahh! Kevin!

What're you doing
on my computer?

Oh, you're dressed.

Emma's dressed too,
I bet, huh?

What about kelly?
Is kelly dressed?

I'm kidding.

Look, why aren't you
going to l.a.?

I already auditioned here
and I blew it.

Even mewes thought I sucked.

Kevin:
no, no, no! No, santos.

You cannot give up,
you know,

Just 'cause you messed up
one time,

For heavens sakes!

If that was the case,

I would've been out of this
business after "jersey girl,"

Which a lot of people
think that I am.

But I'm not,
I'm still here.

I suggest you go down
to los angeles and audition

Because mewes needs you.

What if they've already
picked someone else?

Kevin:
oh my god, manny,
this is the movie business.

Okay, they pick somebody,
they recast immediately.

There is a week left
before they start sh**ting.

That's plenty of time for you
to get down to los angeles,

Knock his socks off
with a better audition

And secure the part
that is rightfully yours.

Believe me, I would love
to go with you

To los angeles right now,

Rather than be here
freezing butt in saskatchewan,

If you follow me.

But you gotta do this.

You can do this!
Go do this.

Paige: (jersey accent)
when I saw you,

Standing there
at the quick stop,

You had your arm around
what's-her-name,

She was even wearing
that sweater I gave you,

It just hurt so bad!

I can't even be in the same room
as the two of you.

Mewes:
dude, I know this girl.

This the lesbian chick
that got cut

From "jay and silent bob
go canadian, eh?"

Robbie:
that's great. So you already
have a working relationship.

Dude, she's not my trixie,
all right?

And you went ahead
and gave her a screen test?

Robbie:
yeah. I'm the producer
and I loved her.

You want this project
green-lit or...

Or not?

(Door opens,
paige sighs heavily)

Come on.

(Paige sighs,
truffles whines)

Tell me about it.
Hailey parties while I sl*ve.

(Whir of approaching vehicle)

Uh...

Are you looking
for hailey?

Au contraire, paige.
I'm looking for you.

Will you be mewesical high's
prom queen?

(Camera shutter clicks)

Oh...my god!

I got the part?

That's right, baby.

This is the craziest thing
that has ever happened to me.

Uh...

Thank you.
You won't regret this.

'Course not.
'Kay, sweetie, gotta run.

See you at the studio!

(Phone keys beep,
limo doors shut)

Marco, uh...

Know how you wanted
to visit?

I think this week will work.

Why don't I buy your ticket?

(Hum of chatter)

Hailey:
...said, "I think you got
a stain on you."

She said,
"no, that's the dress."

So I said,
"whatever shenae grimes.

"The shores" has an after show.

Does " "
have an after show?"

Hm? (Laughs)

Paige!

(Truffles whines)

Truffles isn't dressed
for cocktails.

Remember the mewesical high
audition?

Oh my god,
did I get the part?

No. I did,
so I'm quitting.

You?!

Ugh!
Who will look after truffles?

Where will you stay?

If you think I'm gonna
let you stay here

And freeload off of me...

That's okay,
they're putting me up

In a house
in beverly hills.

Thanks for everything
though.

You think you've got it all
figured out,

But this town is a lot tougher
than it looks.

No matter how tough it gets,
hailey,

I'll never treat people
the way you've treated me.

See ya later, truffles.

(Truffles whines)

My best buddy!
About to become a big star?!

Paige!
You must be thrilled.

Ah! Beyond thrilled.

And when you and ellie get here?

I am going to dial it up
to ecstatic.

We'll be your entourage.

Paige:
oh, no, hon,
just my friends.

I have a feeling
I'm gonna need them out here.

Good afternoon.

Hi, uh...
Paige michalchuk.

(Murmuring)
paige michalchuk...

Welcome to hollywood.