08x20 - Paradise City, Pt. 2

[bunniefuu]

(Power drill whirs)

I can't believe
this is actually happening.

Oh! That was fast.

Robbie:
(chuckles)
you are so adorable.

There's your director.
(Cell phone rings)

It's the studio.

Why don't you say hello to jason
while I take this,

And then...
Lunch at the holly?

Okay.

Dude, robbie the suit
keeps saying she's adorable

And whatever,

But, sir,
she's not my trixie!

Oh, dude,
then why are you using her?

I don't get it.
Why would you cast her

If she's not your trixie?

Mewes:
I have no choice.
He's the boss.

Kevin:
oh, listen to you, man.

Just come on, dude!
Whose story is it, all right?

Who wrote the screenplay?

A lot of misspellings,
but whatever.

Who's directing?
It's you, man!

God, what happened to you?

If I wasn't stuck here
in winnipeg,

I'd come down there

And smack taste
outta your mouth, I swear.

You're making me sick.

I knew I should've directed
this movie.

I... Just...

Wanted to say hello.

(Power tool whirs)

♪♪♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

♪ If I hold out ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

♪ Yeah! ♪

♪ Oh! Oh! Oh! ♪

♪ Be the best ♪

♪ The best that I can be ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it ♪

♪ I can make it ♪

♪ I can make it through ♪

♪ Whatever it takes ♪

♪ I know I can make it through ♪

(Hum of chatter)

You sure you don't wanna
join us in whistler

For the break?

Too much work.

Have fun.

Ellie nash?

Hi.

I've got here
a ticket

To sunny california,

Courtesy of paige.

She promises
the star treatment.

Okay, I'm still in shock
that she actually got that part,

But...

No, I should just get ahead
on the next issue.

(Phone rings)

I thought it might be fun

To reunite
our little family...

In l.a.!

It's your mom.
She's at the hospital.

Marco:
is everything okay?

Yeah, um...

Yeah, no...
She just volunteers there.

Tell her I'll call her back.

Okay.

She'll call you back.

From the airport.

Yes!

Yes!

Yes! House reunion time!

We're gonna have a blast!

Emma:
there has to be a way
to get you to l.a.

For that audition.

Well...

(Change clatters)

Find the magic money.

You know, you could always
hitch a ride with the guys.

Yeah, I figure
it's the least I can do

After losing us
the part in the movie.

I got a bus driver,
I'll pay for gas.

We'll bring food,
sleep on the bus,

Play gigs
all across america.

Emma:
and manny's coming with.

Uh, this trip?
It's just the guys.

Emma:
remember that time
that you that emailed

Topless photos of manny
to everyone in the school?

(Chuckles)

You owe her.

Big time.

All right,
well, I'll ask the driver.

As he says, "jay's bus,
jay's rules."

"Jay" as in jay hogart?

No. There is no way
I'm getting on a bus

With that boy.

(Traffic hums)

(Paparazzi yell
to get paige's attention)

Oh.

Paparazzo:
careful! Are you all right?

(Awkward half laugh)

"Mewesical high star
hits new low:

Trips and falls down
at the holly."

There is no such thing
as bad publicity.

I am so new
to this hollywood thing,

Which is why I have
a few questions.

Like who calls the sh*ts
on set?

(Half laughs)
the director.

Oh.

Unless i, the producer,

Disagree with him.

So if jason mewes
didn't like me and you did?

You'd have nothing
to worry about.

Now, just be
your adorable self

And I'll take care
of everything else.

(Gushes)

Oh. I should go.

I have to pick up my friends
at the airport.

We'll call you a car...

After you have a cappuccino
with my friend tim rozon.

He's gonna be starring
in my next picture.

Tim, this is paige michalchuk,

The studio's newest star.

I think this would be good
for your career.

Who knows,
maybe we'll hit it off

And we can fake a relationship
for the press?

I guess I could be
a few minutes late.

(Airplane whistles overhead)

Marco:
so, which celeb
should we add to our posse?

Ooh, taylor kitsch?
Ha!

I think we'd all
get along with him.

(Laughs)

Wife and kids:
oh! (Joyful cries)

(Muted airport announcement)

(Sniffles)

Hey, are you all right?

(Hum of chatter)

I'm fine. Yeah.

Um... The l.a. Air is so dry.

Paige:
marco? Eleanor?

Ellie and marco:
(excited squeals)
hi! Hi!

(Squeezing grunt)

Sorry I'm late.

Lunch at the holly
with my producer

And one of his stars showed up.

But I am here now,

And a limo awaits
to show us the town!

♪ Let's get crazy ♪

♪ Let's be sure
to lose our mind ♪

♪ Let your hair down ♪

♪ Welcome to your life ♪

♪ Welcome to your life ♪

♪ This is gonna be
a good year ♪

It can't be...

Ashton kutcher!

♪ This is gonna be
a good year ♪

Honey, I could've told you
that wasn't ashton kutcher.

His shoulders
are a lot broader.

Yeah, and I think
he stopped wearing

That trucker hat
in ' .

But I like yours.

Kids today.
I know.

Let's go find
jean harlow.

Bye, love.

Bye.

♪ There's lots of sunshine ♪

♪ Just spread your love
all over tonight, yeah ♪

♪ This is gonna be
a good year ♪

♪ This is gonna be
a good year ♪

♪ This is gonna be
a good year ♪

♪ Right now ♪

Are you ready?

(Stunned gasps and laughter)

Marco:
oh my god!

Oh my god!
Look at this place!

(Laughs)

I can't believe
you live here!

I know.
Isn't it amazing?

It's the perks
of being a leading lady.

I didn't even know
you could act.

Thank you, eleanor,
for your confidence.

See? I always knew
you had star potential.

(Laughs)

Jay?

Jay?!

This is a bad, bad, bad,

Bad, bad idea.

Jay:
that voice!

Could it be?
Manny santos.

It's hard to tell
since she hangs up

Every time I call.

(Annoyed exhale)
I can't do this.

Look, manny is in a horrible
relationship right now.

And the only way to save her
is to get her to l.a.

Please,
if you care about her,

Convince her
to come with you.

All right, if you need help
getting to l.a.,

I've got the route mapped out,

The gps ready,
and a t*nk full of gas.

Emma:
there's no reason to say no.

(Dance music plays,
hum of crew chatter)

Paige:
marco...

Marco:
oh...

(Laughs happily)

I can't believe your doing
a "seventeen" sh**t.

This is crazy!

Crazy stunning.

But I think I would
photograph better

In something more tapered.

Oh, I was just wondering

If I have to wear
this exact dress?

If it isn't hollywood's
newest diva.

Oh...
The dress is beautiful.

I just think something
more classic

Would suit me better.

Like that black and white
dress there.

Uh, she's right,
you know.

Simple.
Really makes an impact.

Emma:
oh! I'm so proud
that you're going to l.a.

Manny:
well, if I can get there
without k*lling jay.

Kelly:
can't be worse
than your psycho professor.

That guy's a real creep.

(Door opens)

(Door closes)

(Barks)

Mick.

I've been looking
all over for you.

(Dog whines)

Can we go somewhere
and talk?

(Hum of chatter)

Mick:
so you messed up
the audition,

Just like I said
you would.

Manny:
mick...

You're not ready
for professional work.

Anyone can see that.

Mick.

Oh, come on,
let's go.

I thought I could do it.

I've indulged this behaviour
long enough.

I said let's go.

Kevin smith said
if I just get down there,

I still have a chance.

Kevin smith?

What's gonna change this time?

You're still
the untalented girl

That crawled out of my bed
yesterday morning.

You think I have no talent?

(Laughs)

How you conned your way
into smithdale drama

I'll never know.

How can you say that?

Just don't come crying
back to me

When you fail.

Spinner:
everybody, just got off
the phone with marco.

Paige is starring
in that jason mewes film.

How awes is that?

Dude,
I used to date her!

Michael:
ogling?

What am i,
some mad scientist genius?

Paige:
hell-o?!
I thought you were a brainiac!

I meant stop staring
at their melons.

Dude, she's totally
screwing me up.

Mewes:
look, trixie was
a classy broad.

She would say "boobs."

My script says "melons."

Mewes:
no, that's the old version.

Blazing through the scenes?

Michael raye:
yeah, like a well-oiled
machine.

Mewes:
this girl you picked, dude?

She looks the part...
Somewhat.

She's not exactly
an actress though.

This is my girl.

Try to make it work.

All right, guys, let's uh...

Let's try this again.
From the top.

Paige:
how many times
do I have to tell you, jason?

Stop staring at their boobs.

(Inhales and exhales nervously)

How was that?

Honestly?

Paige:
ugh! We have been at this
for hours

And I'm not getting
any better.

There goes my career
as a hollywood starlet.

Ellie:
so what?

When was the last time
you acted?

Like, grade ?

Paige:
grade .
Give me some credit.

Okay. They liked
your screen test, right?

You can do this.

I-i understood that scene.

I just...
I need to calm down.

Comfort food,
like... Like back bacon

And maple syrup.

Oh... The best stuff
is at the canadian shop.

Get me some?

I'll go. Um...

Just run lines with marco
until the voice coach comes.

Okay, I can do this.

Thanks! Thanks for everything,
you guys.

It really means a lot to me.

Okay...

Spinner:
dude, that's kind
of a fire hazard.

Hey, man,
every candle counts.

Be careful, okay?

(Door chimes jingle)

(Half laughs
in disbelief)

What's the occasion?

Peter:
well, you've got your big sh**t
over the break,

And I've got my trip
with the guys,

So I thought I'd arrange
a little romantic lunch.

Mm, well,
didn't you get my email?

The sh**t got postponed,
so now I'm free.

Oh!

Well, I've still got
my guys trip

And you have izzy,
so...

Well, my mom is taking izzy away
to see her great-grandma.

(Stunned) oh...
Normally that'd be great,

But we're gonna be
totally roughing it...

With my work keeping me
so busy,

I thought it'd be nice
to hang out.

I'm sure the guys
will understand.

(Awkward breath)

(Hum of traffic, horns beep,
din of chatter)

Ellie nash!

Craig!
Oh my god. Hi.

Hi.

I, I can't believe
you're in l.a.

I can't believe you're eating
ketchup chips

With... Pete wentz.

What can I say?
We're addicted.

Craig:
yeah, uh, this is pete

And this is cassadee
from hey monday.

Hey.

Ellie: hey.
Cassadee: hi.

Dude introduced us
to ketchup chips,

And now we can't go on tour
without 'em.

Yeah, they're so hard
to find,

But so worth it.

Why didn't you call?

We just assumed
you'd be on tour.

We? You're, uh,
you're here with someone?

Marco and I are visiting paige.

Oh! Then you should all
drop by tonight.

I'm playing in this club
called "the highland grounds."

You look good.

Yeah.

Clean and sober
for a year now.

Anyway, we gotta hit
a sound check,

But, uh...
See you tonight?

Yeah! Yeah,
if we can tear ourselves away

From the hustle and bustle
of hollywood.

It was nice meeting
you guys.

Nice meeting you.

Bye.

♪ And I was hoping
that I could change you ♪

♪ Be the one to tame you ♪

♪ But you... ♪
(Panicky breaths)

♪ You never got... ♪

Ugh...
(Hyperventilating)

♪ But you never got close ♪

♪ Maybe you didn't know ♪

Mewes:
cut! Cut! Cut!

Look, this is the moment
I fell in love with trixie.

When I looked across the hall?

My whole world changed,
all right?

So when you sing this,

The audience has to feel
that way too.

Uh... For the record,

I'm not...
I'm not feeling this.

Hello? These stairs
are gonna collapse,

Like, any second.

The only thing I feel
is terrified.

Can someone help me down,
please!

Mewes:
ah, get her down please.

Marco:
(laughs)

Ah... I wish
they filmed that.

It'd be great
for the blooper reel.

In case you didn't notice,
I had a panic att*ck in there,

And...
You just laughed at me.

You know, I thought
you would come to l.a.

And be my friends,

But ellie doesn't even want
to come to the studio

And you're not on my side.

I am.

Paige,
it's gonna be okay.

No, it's not.

I'm gonna get fired
and I'll have to go back

To picking up
after hailey's stupid dog.

I thought you were
her stylist.

I was her assistant.

(Phone rings)

Wow.
Robbie wants to see me.

To fire me.
'Cause paige fails again.

Go enjoy the pool
while we still have it.

(Marco's phone rings)

Hi, mrs. Nash.

What's up?

Emma:
so that's it?

You told jay to leave for l.a.
Without you?

Paige got the part.

Guess even she's more
talented than I am.

I should've listened to mick
in the first place.

It's mewes.

Mewes, it's emma.

Really?

Gotcha.

(Sighs)
so, paige isn't working out.

What does that mean?

It means,
get your butt to l.a., Pronto!

I don't know
how you did it...

I promise I'll improve.
I-i'm taking singing lessons.

I got a dance coach...

This isn't about
your singing.

I told mr. Mewes
you aren't going anywhere.

Check this out.

I got the "seventeen" cover?

Robbie:
and thousands of dollars
in free publicity

Before we sh**t a frame.

You just became very valuable
to the movie.

However you did it,

Keep doing it

At the "young women
in hollywood" gala tonight.

Let's see just how many covers
you can snag for this film.

I won't let you down.

(Front door shuts)

(Phone keys beep)

Okay, guess what?

Your mom called me.

She said you weren't
answering your cell?

Ellie, she told me your dad's
back from afghanistan.

It's complicated.

I know.

Your father's sick,

You haven't even been
to see him yet.

Okay. I really don't
wanna talk about this.

You can't just avoid it.

Watch me.

(Door slams shut)

Jay:
next stop, california.

Sav:
sweet!

Two weeks of scratching,
belching,

Not-showerin'
good times.

Yeah, guys, about that...

Hey, guys!

Thanks so much
for letting me come.

No problem.

Jay:
we gotta hit the road now,

If we want somewhere
remotely warm to sleep.

Gets cold on the bus.

So much for scratchin'
and belchin'.

Jay! Jay!

Wait! Wait! Wait!

I'm coming with you.

You sure this time?

Well, then welcome aboard.

(Luggage clatters)

Guys:
wooooo! Yeah baby!

Peter:
where we goin'?!

Sav:
southern california, baby!

Danny:
here we come!

Guys:
southern california,
here we come!

♪ If you believe
everything has a reason ♪

♪ If you believe that
what you see will unfold ♪

♪ If you believe
that everybody... ♪

I thought you'd hate me
after I quit.

When I heard you were
going to this thing,

I was so relieved.

These young women
in hollywood losers

Are so lame.

Talk about lame,

I flew my friends
down here

And they don't understand

How important
these events are.

Well, that's why famous people
are friends with famous people.

'Cause we get it.

Marco:
paige! Wait!

I'm worried about ellie.

(Exasperated sigh)
it's not the time, marco.

Her dad's sick

And she's in total denial
about it.

She won't even talk to me.

Hailey:
our red carpet time is : .

Marco:
paige,

Ellie's hurting.

I'll talk to her.
Tomorrow.

This my first red carpet.

I wanna enjoy it.

♪ Soon you will go ♪

♪ You always do ♪

♪ My fair weather friend ♪

♪ My fair weather friend ♪

♪♪♪

Paige:
you missed a tres cool party.

It was beyond words.

Check out the gift bag!

Oh, great.
The economy model.

(Watch clatters)

(Computer beeps)

(Gasps) our pictures
are all over the web.

Perez called you
the newest celebu-slut.

Th-that's good, right?

Uh, try great.

Why is there antennas
on your head?

Sign of affection.

But of course,
you wouldn't know that.

Marco:
oh.

Why is that?

'Cause you're not
in the biz.

Come on, marco.
Things are finally working out.

Just... Be happy for me.

Please.

Look at this one!

Paige: (gasps)
hailey: oh my god...

Paige:
do you realize how many people
are gonna see this?

This is crazy!

Look how hot you look.

That is so fab.