01x07 - Mermaid Tails

Episode transcripts for the 2016 TV show "Escape the Night". Aired June 2016 - September 2019.*
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In "Escape the Night" ten guests are invited from the modern world to attend a dinner at Joey Graceffa's newly acquired mansion estate, which has been locked in the 1920's; when America was roaring... roaring with madness. This is a dinner party to die for. No one is safe.
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01x07 - Mermaid Tails

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[Voiceover] Previously on Escape the Night.

We attempt to bind the evil

but the ritual failed.

(laughter)

I don't think it worked.

[Voiceover] And we learned we have a new mission.

The evil in this house gathers its strength

from its five former owners.

When they are released the demon will be

weak enough to banish.

That's why it didn't work.

Holy sh*t!

[Voiceover] In a surprising twist, Sierra is k*lled

by Matt during an exorcism.

Sierra, I'm so sorry.

You need to stop making me do that.

Hey!

(glass breaks)

Are you listening?

This is your fault.

I hope our daughter has more sense than you.

[Voiceover] I will give you the strength to k*ll him,

but first you must let me change you.

Are you coming, Mommy?

I'll be in in a moment, dear.

Stop playing games, Madison!

Get out of the pool!

No, no, ah!

(dramatic music)

[MATT] Do you not see a pattern here?

Do you guys get where I'm coming from?

Okay, but we can't, like, just give up,

otherwise we're as good as dead.

I just don't see the light at the end of the tunnel here.

Well, why don't we just try going and finding

the next owner so we can free it and get on

with our lives?

Yeah.

Alright, alright.

[JOEY] What is that?

[LELE] Oh, a mermaid?

[JOEY] "Madison developed a taste for men

and soon the pool was filled with her victims.

The key to her room rests on the first floor

and can only be found by breaking open the world."

[EVA] The world!

[TIM] Oh, the world!

It says we have to break open the world

and right away everyone lit up

because there's a globe on one side of the room.

[OLI] You think gotta break it?

[TIM] Oh, okay, do it.

[LELE] Alright.

[EVA] I think we should step on it.

[JOEY] Yeah, break that off.

I'm picking that up

and I'm breaking that.

[TIM] Yeah!

[EVA] There's nothing in it?

Alright, that's not the world.

So, what could it be?

Oh, there's another globe there!

Easy.

Can I break it?

Yeah, yeah, just do it.

[OLI] Bloody hell!

[LELE] Okay, good.

[OLI] We're doing this wrong.

[EVA] We broke the world.

"The key to the room is on the first floor."

This is the first floor.

This is the ground floor.

No.

We're not in London!

[TIM] Stop talking crazy English talk!

[MATT] Let's just look in other rooms.

Poppycock!

Oh, there's a world map in the foyer.

[MATT] I don't know if we need to break it,

I was just saying that there's a map.

[TIM] We just made that demon extra angry,

'cause we broke some, like, really nice globes.

[JOEY] There's so many.

[EVA] There's so many worlds.

That spirit is gonna be pissed.

If my house gets trashed in the process of freeing us,

then I'm fine with that.

[TIM] Oh.

[MATT] Guys, guys.

[TIM] Wait, wait, is it?

[EVA] That looks dangerous.

[MATT] It looks like he's hold...

[TIM] Oh, my God.

[MATT] Ohhhhh! [TIM] Ohhhhh!

[MATT] We found keys.

The key we find actually takes us up

to the second floor,

so all of us rush upstairs and we try the first door,

and sure enough, it lets us right in.

It's foggy.

(screams)

Please help me.

I don't know what she is,

she's like scary and her mouth's sliced open,

she has gill titties,

really nice gill titties,

but am I turned on, am I scared,

am I both?

I was both.

House, the house it lied to me.

It said I would be free,

but now I am in chains.

I hated my husband, it's true.

What happened to you?

He was a very, very bad man.

[JOEY] She looks terrifying.

But also at the same time it's like,

I wanna help her.

[MERMAID] But the worst part is,

I've lost my daughter too.

The only way I can be with her again

is if I find her favorite doll,

and then I make things right

with those I have k*lled.

You,

you, can you help me do those things?

[OLI] Wait, wait, wait.

Yo, there's a reason why you're there.

[TIM] That depends.

I've heard of Greek's history,

about mermaids singing and then eating the men.

Wait, wait, hold on, are you one,

you're one of the previous owners, right?

Yes,

I am.

[JOEY] We have to.

Please help me, I will tell you how

to go about it,

please get the doll.

How do we know we can trust you, though?

You can, look at me.

[MATT] You don't look very trustworthy.

Listen to me,

I wrote the names of the men I m*rder*d.

In my diary on the counter,

those names, they need to be measured

by the letter in coin.

And my husband,

my husband kept a stash of golden coins

in the dining room.

There must be enough to pay for them.

All you need to do

is you have to retrieve three bodies of the innocent men

that are chained to the bottom of the pool

but the pool is guarded by my wicked sisters.

Anyone, anyone of you who dares to enter that pool

will be torn into shreds.

[LELE] What?

The way she talks is freaking me out.

What the hell are you saying?

But they can be lured away

by a very special song.

[JOEY] What do we have to do?

You have to find it,

and after that you will be shown

where to find the doll.

The mermaid tells us that we need

to find this doll to release her and set her free.

This is another mission we need to go on

to release her.

We need to find the song.

[OLI] Guys, we need to go.

[LELE] What the balls?

[MATT] I don't know why we're doing this.

[EVA] Of course you don't know why we're doing this.

[JOEY] Shut up!

We're going round and round

and there's always something for us to do

and there's always a next clue.

It's like we're looking for a buried treasure

that doesn't exist.

Look.

Yeah, the chest.

[OLI] There's a lock on it.

[OLI] And we need three numbers.

[TIM] Three.

There's a symbol over here.

It's a tab card counter.

[EVA] Tab cards.

[Eva] Like a coin counter?

[JOEY] Wait, there's a clue on the side.

"The weight of sin will open the door to a song."

[TIM] 69 pounds? 69, 69-

[EVA] Didn't she say that we need to

put the weight of the coins...

The weight of the coins.

Yeah, of the sin.

We don't really have any specific idea

of where this gold is,

so we're just looking everywhere.

[MATT] Sin, the weight of sin.

[JOEY] Alcohol?

Yes, alcohol is a sin and-

There's alcohol over there.

Do you think you'd weigh that?

[JOEY] Try 620.

[OLI] 620?

[OLI] It's not, it's not 620.

[MATT] Sarah, do you know anything

about the weight of sin?

Sinning in this house?

Sin at all?

Why don't we put you on it?

Why am I a sin?

[TIM] Damn!

[LELE] Yo, you are deep.

We have no idea what we were doing,

or where it could be,

so, eventually,

we have to ask the spirit board.

Greetings, spirit, speak to us.

[LELE] Okay. [JOEY] Okay.

[JOEY] Give us...

A sign

of where it could be.

Where is the weight of

sin?

F,

L,

O,

O,

R.

Floor.

The spirit board says floor,

and we realize it has to be on the floor somewhere.

All of a sudden, I look in this gate

and I'm like, "Wait a second, these can be removed."

So I start picking apart the gate on the floor

of, like, the vent,

and there it is, the box.

[JOEY] Oh, my gosh!

[MATT] Wow, the floor.

(Everyone) Yes!

[OLI] We got the gold.

[JOEY] Awesome, let's put it on the scale.

Yes.

So, we put the whole bag on there,

that number didn't work for the combination.

So we're like, what are we supposed to do?

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

what did she say?

She said something else.

Their names need to be measured

by the letter in coin.

I think it's measured by the letter in coin.

The letter in coin.

Maybe it has something to do with

the three names that she's k*lled.

[MATT] I'm not gonna lie to you guys,

I'm a little burnt out after I k*lled Sierra.

So, my brain, my brain isn't, you know.

I get it if you don't understand what to do,

but don't like, put your hands up and be like,

"You guys figure it out."

Count the letters in the names,

try that out.

43.

Okay, so let's put 43 coins in the bag

and then weight that.

[EVA] I don't think we have 43 coins.

They weren't really feeling that idea at first,

but then when they finally did it,

what happened?

Try 260.

[TIM] Try 260.

It worked!

How did you get that?

They don't realize how smart I am

in this game because most of the time, I'm right.

[LELE] Okay, "Play this record to lure the evil mermaids

out of the water,

but once they've come to the source of the song,

you must find a way to keep them there."

Oh, no.

Once we head out to the pool,

we're all shocked.

There are actually mermaids in the pool

and they're terrifying.

[LELE] Oh, my God!

[TIM] Ahhh!

[LELE] I kinda think they're prettier than

the girl that was in the bathroom.

Listen, split up, look for a record player out here.

I've always realized that there was

this record player in the ballroom.

But how are we gonna get the record player

to play the sound

and for the mermaids to hear it

when it's in the ballroom?

Wherever this plays,

that's where the mermaids are gonna be attracted to.

But not inside the house. I don't want them in here.

Yeah, they're gonna get, like, wet all over the carpet.

It's a really nice carpet.

So the plan is,

we're going to keep the phonograph in the pool house,

we're gonna put the record in,

run out,

and lure the mermaids in.

[EVA] They look like...

[JOEY] So scary.

They look terrifying.

[JOEY] Take a peak, take a peak.

(dramatic music)

[LELE] They're hot, awesome body.

(dramatic music)

(screaming)

(screaming)

Go!

(screaming)

[OLI] Right.

Uh, we have the three dead bodies in here.

[OLI] Uh, who's, who's going in?

[EVA] Guys, the mermaids are coming, so hurry.

We're gonna have to take these bodies

out to bury them,

but in order to do that,

that means that somebody's gonna have

to get into the pool and get them out.

I usually don't go in water past my nipples

because I know I'll drown.

[LELE] Uh. I'll go in 'cause I'm a good swimmer...

[MATT] Yeah, Lele, I like that, you get in the pool.

You know you wanna see me.

I was doing it for Matt 'cause I know

he was looking at me so I just take

my clothes off and, you know,

he was looking at me, we all saw that.

Yes, guys, take it off.

This is my kinda dinner party.

[LELE] You're such-

[EVA] You're such a sick ass.

He was just laughing like he always does.

Lele and I are gonna jump in,

we're gonna bring the bodies up to you guys.

You guys gather them together

and start looking in their pockets.

The mermaid said there's something in them, okay?

They have secrets of their own.

[MATT] Alright, we can help with that.

Thankfully Joey and Lele dive straight in.

Don't drown!

[EVA] Come on guys, you're fine.

[MATT] I'm very surprised.

Lele stepped up to the plate and she jumped

in the water and I'm encouraging her.

[MATT] Great job.

[OLI] Well done, well done, well done.

[MATT] I'm loving Lele.

Yeah, let's get him out.

[MATT] Just keep at it.

[JOEY] I'm so exhausted by, like, halfway through this.

Like, I'm like, I don't even know if I can finish this.

[LELE] The more you work, the harder it is to breathe,

so I'm going back and forth and back and forth,

and it's just very hard.

[TIM] Man, it looks like...

[JOEY] I got it!

[OLI] You got it?

[MATT] Nice job, Joey.

[OLI] There's something in this guy's pocket.

[TIM] Oh, my God.

You guys are doing great.

[MATT] Lele's really stepping up.

[TIM] Yeah, she's killin' the game right now.

[MATT] I'm not gonna lie, you know

I was a little worried about her earlier tonight,

but, she's kinda proven me wrong.

[EVA] The mermaids are coming.

(hissing)

We did it!

[TIM] Nice job, yay!

So, Joey and Lele, while you guys were in the pool,

we found something on the first body you brought us.

Guys, it looks like there's something

at the end of the pool.

Do you see it?

Joey, do you see it?

[MATT] Wow.

[TIM] It looks like they found something.

[MATT] What do they have there?

[EVA] It looks like a treasure chest.

[OLI] Oh, yes, what've you got?

There's a chest, but it's locked.

[EVA] We'll figure it out.

Bring it over here.

[JOEY] Okay.

So, we find two things.

We find a pocket watch and we find

a treasure chest from the bottom of the pool,

but we can't get the combination to open it.

[TIM] Oh, what's on the back?

It says, "The moon commands the waters

and tells it what direction to flow

from new moon to full moon."

The moon works with the Earth to control things,

'cause of the gravitational pull.

So we need to twist it until it gets

to the full moon maybe?

Does it switch behind?

Maybe we add up the time it takes

to go from the crescent moon

to the full moon. and that's-

Which is what?

Uh, like I said astrophysics is

a little complicated, probably a little bit

over your head.

I'm really disappointed with Matt.


After he got back from the exorcism

like, he's just taking a step back

and he's not pulling his weight.

[JOEY] Something past one? 10 past one?

Is there something we're missing?

[MATT] So...

[JOEY] Something that has to do with the water.

[MATT] The water's flowing.

[OLI] There's something on the turtles.

[OLI] Wait hold on, there's a black circle here.

[EVA] Yeah, that was never there.

[OLI] There is another moon here, another moon there

another moon there, another moon there, and another moon there.

[Timothy] Oh, yeah, right.

[MATT] We gotta add 'em up,

what kind of moons are they?

[TIM] This is the full moon over here.

[MATT] We got a full moon there.

Does it have a number on the turtle or anything?

[EVA] This is a full moon too.

[OLI] Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

There are two little turtles here

and there's three little turtles there.

[EVA] Yeah.

So we count up the little baby turtles

that go with each turtle.

And as they go in order

it gives us the number combination.

[JOEY] Yes, we got it!

[LELE] You got it?

[MATT] Whoever figured that out,

you guys are very smart people.

I appreciate every single one of you.

Listen, I checked out. I k*lled Sierra, it's over.

We're all gonna die.

[EVA] Who says that?

Matt has just completely given up

and he's like making a point to tell all of us

that he just doesn't care anymore.

"The doll dwells inside a wicked little house

which waits in the north corner of the third floor.

Two guests, selected by vote,

must place this tablet on the mantle

outside the room and the door will be opened.

But, what lies inside will haunt them forever."

[MATT] Yeah, see, let's take a vote.

[EVA] Yeah, let's definitely take a vote,

'cause I know exactly who I'm voting for.

It's about time.

It's time for Matt to go.

This just seems a little irrational.

No...

No, who votes Matt?

[MATT] We didn't even vote.

[JOEY] It doesn't matter.

As soon as we find out that we're voting again,

everyone once again is turning their back against me.

[EVA] Matt, you made it very clear you wanted

to die earlier today.

But, I still get a vote though,

I still get a vote.

[TIM] Okay, let him do his job.

[OLI] We need to take this with us.

I hope it's Matt and Matt that get's pulled.

[MATT] Wow.

[MATT] That's just a little aggressive, don't you think?

[EVA] I'm telling you, Matt's a psychopath.

Well, that got interesting out there.

Yeah, you guys are just a little too, uh, turned up here.

Turned up?

[MATT] Yeah, turned up.

Is it the correct word for right now?

Do we wanna party with DJ Snake right now?

I don't think so.

I'm just going off on Matt because he doesn't

deserve to be here, especially right now.

He's been acting like he doesn't want to be here,

so if he doesn't wanna be here,

then like, he needs to go.

I am so happy I'm not the only one screaming

at Matt and Eva's taking over.

You stand in the side, you go,

"I'm gonna let you guys take care of this one."

[JOEY] Yeah, twice.

So, let's take care of you.

That was a good impression.

You know, going into that exorcism, it changed me,

and I'm just a different person,

but I didn't think it warranted

how aggressive and how mean everybody was being.

It's like, they all wanted me to die.

I just, you know, I felt terrible.

You guys suck.

Let's put it to a vote.

It's done.

I vote that they all suck.

Then, Matt, it's your turn,

go first.

I hate this.

I love this, I want him out.

Eva's coming off a bit too strong against Matt

which kind of concerns me.

She was helping and everything like that,

and now she's just snapping at everyone.

And then that kind of makes me question her.

[Arthur] Matt.

Of course it is, okay.

And the second name to be drawn is Tim.

[LELE] Oh, okay, then I'm okay.

[TIM] Um.

I was not expecting that.

Best get this done, man.

And we might not die.

No, you guys are gonna die.

He's gonna die. If he comes back here alive,

if he comes back here alive, we're gonna k*ll him.

[ARTHUR] It's time.

Eva's energy is kinda throwing me off

at this point.

I don't really know what to make of it.

[LELE] Come back, Timothy.

I know that they're making a mistake

by putting me out to get k*lled.

Oh, my God.

[TIM] Go ahead.

[MATT] Dude, I don't like dolls.

It's just creepy, like, their eyes are burnt out

and they're d*sfigured and dismembered.

I don't know what I was expecting,

but this isn't it.

"Both of you take a drink if you want to know more."

What?

[BOTH] Uhhhhhh.

I've been to the club.

You're not supposed to take a drink

unless you saw the bartender make it.

Ugh, what is it?

Is it blood?

Oh, here, cheers.

Okay, let's do this.

Bring it around.

[MATT] Alright.

All the way, bro.

No, it just...

All the way.

It says take a drink, I took a drink.

Alright, fine.

(knocking)

[TIM] Oh, a note.

I wanna read it, I wanna read it.

"You just drank poison."

Are you serious?

"Sorry about that, but it was quite funny

from where I'm standing.

There's only one portion of the antidote

and the only way to retrieve it is

to search your side of the room for three dolls

that best reflect the rhymes in your storybook,

and place them in their proper setting in the house."

So, when you think you're done,

you're supposed to slam you're little book down,

something will pop up.

It's either the antidote or more poison

depending on if you got it right or not.

If you got it right, then you have the antidote.

If you were wrong, then it's more poison.

"It is now time to start the timer

and begin reading your rhymes."

[MATT] 30 minutes.

[MATT] "Little General Monk sat upon a trunk

eating a crust of bread."

"Lizzy Borden took an a*,

gave her mother 40 whacks."

I can't believe people actually used

to read these nursery rhymes to their kids!

It's crazy!

"Dead was she on Friday,

glad was I on Saturday night

to bury my wife on Sunday."

What the hell?

[TIM] Okay, okay.

"Old Father Long Legs can't say his prayers,

take him by the left leg and throw him down the stairs.

And when he's at the bottom,

before he long has lain,

take him by the right leg pull him up again."

Where did you put your first thing?

Don't worry about it, dude.

Oh, crap.

One of my riddles said a General Monk

that has b*rned and set in hot fire,

and you know, I'm assuming right now

that I'm looking for some sort of doll

that has been b*rned in some way

and I'm having trouble finding it.

[TIM] "Or else I'll b*at you black and blue."

Black and blue, yeah, black and blue.

Are these all, like, community dolls?

I'm not sure.

There's one portion.

I don't know.

No, it says your side of the room.

Oh, God dammit.

Get-put my dolls down, dude.

It's me or Timothy, like, that's what it comes down to,

that's it and I'm trying my best

to make sure I come out of this alive.

"General Monk is dead, keep always from the fire,

if it catch your attire, you too."

Where do I put him, though?

I don't know if these are the daughters.

Is that it?

I keep second guessing myself,

I keep changing it around making sure I got it right,

because, I think I have it right,

but then, if it's wrong,

No hold up, wait, hold up.

Then I'm drinking poison again.

I think I've got what I need.

How close are you, do you think?

I feel like I'm on the last one, but-

I feel like I'm on the last one too.

You wanna help each other with these, like,

some Romeo and Juliet type of thing?

I don't think we're-I don't think we can do that.

Uh,

alright, it was a thought.

[TIM] (laughs)

I think I've got mine right,

I really do.

You gotta be missing something,

I'm missing something too.

[MATT] I think I got it.

No, I think I got it.

[TIM] Ah!

(suspensful music)

Dude.

If you're wrong, you die.

I think, I'm almost positive I'm right.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry if it's you, but...

Yes!

Oh, my God.

Are you okay?

Oh, my God.

"The antidote is attached to the back of the drawer."

(piano playing)

Ah, yes!

What's that?

Okay.

[EVA] Someone's coming down the stairs.

(cheering)

Yes!

[LELE] Timothy!

[JOEY] What happened?

Timothy, tell us everything.

We went in there and they poisoned us both,

and, uh, I got the antidote.

What is this?

And this is the doll that we need

for the mermaid lady's little girl.

That looks disgusting.

Well, let's go give it to her, guys.

Come on, let's go.

Ah, she's still there.

Okay, we got your doll.

[MERMAID] You found it.

Am I giving this, here you go.

[MERMAID] Yes, please.

[OLI] We got it for you.

She can be free now.

[OLI] I wanted to get her number.

[TIM] Now what?

[JOEY] We freed her.

I guess we just find the next owner.

Let's go.

[OLI] There we are.

Alright.

So who's the next owner?

(spooky music)
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