02x18 - The Aftermath: III

[bunniefuu]

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yeah I really think it might be over now

I'm feeling much

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oh sweet whipped topping there's chicken

out there people shouldn't make me

hungry you wouldn't like me when I'm

hungry

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to be and everything

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nothing in my

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[Applause]

Total Drama Action

aftermath show Jeff here and I'm Bridget

a ton has happened since we last saw you

TVA has lost some serious heavyweights

Oh a beautiful

we've also got our bugs from season one

and Richard thinks we need to bring more

insanity to the show huh I mean

profanity okay okay more humanity

Richard thinks I've gone too

over-the-top but then so of our ratings

okay I get that this is a reality show

and that everyone wants the dirt on what

went down but everyone on TDA who I'd

like to remind Jeff are our friends has

already taken it up the wing wing from

Chris plus they've lost out on a million

bucks I mean isn't that brutal enough

they should be able to come here and

feel safe to speak their minds no one

goes on a reality show to feel safe

bridge this isn't some cushy talk show

do you have any idea how incredible the

lighting is on those shows man I mean

who needs to win a million bucks when

you look like a million bucks um I'm not

sure everyone would agree with you there

well our lighting stinks my

dermatologist told me so and so did my

publicist and my new manager

personal guys come on point is this

isn't some touchy-feely place where

people go to talk about their problems

well they can but I'm not gonna make

them feel any better about them nice

hey I just do what our producers tell me

can I help it if I take my job seriously

huh maybe you should try your job is to

get the goods from people how can they

be open when they might get hit over the

head with a hammer or an anvil come on

that's the point of the segment to get

the truth we've got something even

better in store for today's show baby

you've turned into a bully you know that

a total crisp clone I'm with you bridge

our show tonight and because there's

such great sports they deserve something

extra Oh an already broken John had to

eat food through a straw

that's punishment enough that's what you

think before we find out what's in store

for my man Owen let's see what the

dude's been through already

Owen started the season much like he

begins every morning by eating a lot

warmer things didn't end that way

oh and loved lost and had his job

forced to eat his meals through a straw

Owen kept his head held high even at his

low when he was booted off the show

landing himself exactly where he wanted

to be of the nearest food court our

first guest has spawned with salmon

dance naked befriended a coconut and

eaten a toilet seat welcome

[Applause]

wrong alright let's do this

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hi Annie hi Bridget hi Jeff

it's so great to have you own Oh in my

man Izzy would you care to have a seat

I'm good oh so Owen we were so worried

about you you're busted up ja it must

have sucked having to eat all of your

meals through a straw

jimson soda make a scrumptious blendy

I've been making up for it since I said

this before but is he really is like the

ants to inv*de your picnic eventually

you get bitten by the crazy but that's

better than being bitten by like a tiger

shark a tiger shark huh maybe we should

try that on the show don't even think

about it you know what happened with the

piranhas oh and can handle whatever we

throw at him right dude hmm this potato

salad is delicious what's in here

walnuts which means it's time for a

little game I like to call truth or

electrocution

[Applause]

I'm fine right where I am you have got

to be kidding a hammer and anvil and now

an electric chair you want to

electrocute Oh yo babe it's a big chair

but it's low voltage it's okay I'll do

it I was electrocuted up at the lake

once and it wasn't so bad

I'm very well insulated so the truth bro

you'll be okay thanks grant can I take

my food anything you want man

any final requests kidding bridge Oh

kidding this is ridiculous you don't

have to do this Owen it's okay Bridget

I'm going to tell the truth the whole

truth and nothing but the truth

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you don't have to do this Owen so my

uncle Max's toupee included to a cozy

spot at the petting zoo in fifth grade

my little brother John flight of stairs

and blame it on my other little brother

when my mom sent me to summer camp for

bad kids and they served us lots I

pigged out and the rest of the kids had

nothing but the worst thing I've ever

done I mixed the pot of fake puke it all

went to school hid the puke in my jacket

then I made a noise I don't think that's

what type of truth is there you know

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sorry uncle max and Johnny and Gavin and

um mom so Owen how do you feel about

chef when he broke your jaw furious

vengeful think about this now remember I

wasn't mad I didn't feel anything except

lots of pain in my jaw not mad huh you

must have been really upset when Chris

counted only Courtney's vote unfairly

booting you off the show no but you're

gonna sue right no come on you're

telling me your jaw was busted you were

cheated out of a million bucks and

you're not even mad easy Jeff no I mean

yes

I'm not mad okay I've got one more

that's gonna get you know you've had

your go we talked about this you said

you were going to change captain

Hollywood the only thing that you

changed today was your outfit

time just one more bridge one more

question and I'm done I swear

Owen dude what is your biggest problem

hmm

that's a toughy sometimes I worry I'm

too critical of others that Tom makes

your eyes look really pretty Bridget oh

thanks Owen sure

or maybe it's my unrelenting love of

Derry and sometimes don't worry I might

be color blind my shorts bright green or

moss green oh I know what my biggest

problem is I've gone kind of not so with

food since having my John wired I'm game

ten pounds but really let myself go

wrong your biggest problem is that

you're broke horse I'm broke I'm 16 I

mean your whole family's broke dude your

mom was so sure her little boy was gonna

win the moolah last season she went out

and blew 50 breath

and you didn't win a cent Jan what I'm

just telling oh the truth which he

deserves no you're sick I can't stand

this anymore

I'm sorry Owen what's she sorry for not

like she blew all your coin so what did

my mom blow the money on let's find out

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carried away

ma I just want to know one thing what

did you buy a teensy tiny extra-large

cheese seller

okay I just want to know one more thing

is it full of Jesus I've always wanted a

fully stocked cheese seller tell Johnny

and Gavin to leave me the

parmigiano-reggiano the Emmentaler and

the vendor hot dog cheese and I'll be

home soon

love you guys bye it's not an electric

chair so how do you feel Oh Jeff I feel

awesome

how can you not be mad dude it's a chase

seller exactly there's nothing to worry

about when you have the creamy goodness

of cheese watch dudes gonna make a

k*lling promoting cheese on air whoo

why didn't I think of that oh I don't

even know who you are anymore

oh all this dude you've ever been with

not anymore it's over

oh actually it's just time for a short

break really back I was talking about us

we're through done finito chicken

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Harel getting hidden the Kiwis went bad

I think Jeff suffered a bigger shock

than I did

come on oh and could you please tell

Jeff to stop talking to me Jeff

Bridget would like you to stop talking

to her I can hear her couch let's talk

about this

Owen could you please tell Jeff that

it's time to introduce our next tube

gasps fine be that way

Jeff Bridget says it's time to introduce

kind of my job big guy sorry heather and

leshawna are longtime rivals they do

have one thing in common

Heather tried hard to cover her ugly

bald head while leshawna tried hard to

cover her but after getting caught in a

big fat lie in the end the girls formed

an unlikely friendship when Heather

stood up for leshawna when leshawna

didn't have a leg to stand on our next

two guests have licked Owens armpit

stuck jam from his bellybutton and even

a cockroach oh wait that was just

Heather please welcome

[Applause]

oh I forgot you did all those six things

Heather great to see you leshawna

Heather nice wig good to be here girl yo

Jeff oh and would you please tell Jeff

to say hi to our guests

Jeff Bridget would like you to say hi

it's a talk show but they're not talking

to each other oh don't you worry Owen

I'll do all the talking from now on

Heather your turn in the hot seat and by

hot seat I mean electric chair you mean

we have to sit in that I don't think so

thing is it's not up to you whatever

you've got guts girl just tell the truth

then you'll be okay Heather they can

shock me all they want my parents tried

electroshock therapy on me as the kid to

try to make me a nicer person worked

like a charm

so Heather before you were voted off

Courtney was brought back do you think

she's a worthy competitor no do you

think Lindsay's as dumb as she looks do

you think Beth could be a thr*at Beth

absolutely not

she's all yours Bridge baby I'm thinking

it's time for a little never-before-seen

footage of me there isn't anything I've

done or said off camera that's any worse

than what I'll say right now Oh we'll

see about that what is this it's the

turkey cam girl had a camera on her own

crafty what do we have here Heather has

mad skills oh we are girl but that

doesn't make you look any less funny

oh I sure miss Harold

speaking of which it's your turn in the

chair leshawna whoa after what happened

on the show I think leshawna's suffered

enough

oh I've learned my lesson all right this

girls never lying again don't worry we

had so much fun with Heather I'll go

easy on her there'll be no FEMEN over

here lamb on me

so Heather defended you before she was

booted from the show you honestly think

she meant what she said I mean this is

Heather

of course I believe her don't get me

wrong girl can be a real witch but she

stood up for me and where I'm from that

counts for a lot

leshawna did you blame people for being

mad you know what the whole spa thing in

the video heck no I'd have been mad at

me too listen I know I said all those

nasty things but I meant all the nice

things I said even more we've got a

question on webcam RV from Yellowknife

hey there Harvey what's your question uh

hi leshawna are you bad at Harold for

voting you off no I'm not mad at my

sugar baby

cutthroat Court and he got to him plus

it's my own fault II good and trust me

this girl messed up so like uh is there

still hope for you to know what kind of

a question is that Harold and I are just

friends and that's all we'll ever be

Oh are we doing this again yep but

because I promise bridge we'd go easy on

you you might want to watch this before

answering you just gonna love the

courtney cam I've seen that look before

leshawna it's the way Brigitte used to

look at me yes progress it does look

like you like him you're still telling

me you don't like Harold look or you're

sitting alright alright

truth is I like Harold a lot sure

there's a part of me that can't resist

those little man biceps of his who could

but we're friends which is how we're

gonna keep it Harold's little man biceps

[Laughter]

okay someone get me out of this thing no

what is your problem you used to be

sweeter than honey now you're getting

all kinds of nasty that's what I'd like

to know what we're just having a good

time

back me up man um you are kind of mean

now Jeff I am so proud of you whatever

I'm just having some fun you know what I

think would be fun

since you're such a huge fan of truth or

electrocution we think you should take a

turn

our turn to ask the question no crow

coming honest guy right Jeff is this

really the new you the manager the

publicist the bullying or is this just

what you think people want from you hmm

bass next oh you know that's not the way

this works you wrote the rules this is

all be all the way man my new hairstyle

is to me not if the chair gets you first

who do you think is the hottest girl on

the show oh oh I've got one how do you

really feel about Bridget whatever it's

not like a year you crazy about you

bridge I'm sorry about the way I acted

maybe there's a bit of a softie left in

there after all if you promise to behave

promise double swearsies okay that's all

for tonight join critic as next time for

another totally

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oh that's a real spark

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you