05x04 - For Real

[bunniefuu]

[ZAPPING]

[ON SCREEN] Greetings, Titans.

Your number one nemesis, Control Freak, has returned.

You may have thought you saw the last of me in 257-494.

But while away, I've been studying your every move.

And now I'm back with The Ultimate Titans Challenge.

A series of mind-boggling events designed to test your specific skills and stamina.

And to raise the stakes, I have crafted an arsenal...

...of counter-technology weapons to render your powers useless.

Prepare to be defeated.

[LAUGHING]

Hello?

Hello?

Greetings, Titans.

Your number one nemesis has returned.

Greetings, Titans.

Your number one nemesis has returned.

Greetings, Titans.

Your number one nemesis has...

[CHIRPING]

[SCREAMS]

Okay, the Titans aren't home.

But sooner or later, they will face my challenge.

[LAUGHING]

I can wait. I can wait.

[WHISTLING]

There she is, home, sweet tower. At least temporarily.

[BOTH SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

- Titans East, come in. Hey, Cyborg.

I'm transmitting a list of villains to keep an eye out for.

When word gets out that the Titans are out of town someone may try to pull something.

When word gets out the Titans East are in town, they'll think twice.

Guys, thanks for looking after the city while we're off fighting the Brotherhood of Evil.

We're happy to help.

Now, make sure you remember to activate the security lockdown every night...

... and if you're gonna wash the T-Car buff counterclockwise.

Oh, and don't eat the turkey leg in the fridge. I'm saving that for turkey night.

- Turkey. Don't worry, Sparky.

You just concentrate on stopping the Brotherhood of Evil.

We have everything under control here. Bumblebee, out.

[LOUD THUD]

Titans.

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

SPEEDY: Man, they've even got flat-panel computer displays.

How come we don't have flat-panel computer displays?

Greetings, Titans.

Your number one ne...

Hey, you're not the Teen Titans.

We're Titans East.

Aqualad. Speedy.

Mas. Y Menos.

And Bumblebee.

Uh, yeah, never heard of you.

Never heard of us? Who is this guy?

Who am I? I am Control Freak. Master of mass media, ruler of reality.

And I escaped from prison to defeat my "archnemesi," the Titans.

The real Titans.

Robin, teen wonder.

Raven, mistress of magic.

Beast Boy, shape-shifter supreme.

Cyborg, half man, half robot.

And Starfire, alien powerhouse.

She's too good for Robin. He'll never appreciate her.

BOTH: Si.

You sound more like a fan boy than a nemesis.

[STAMMERING]

A great villain always studies his adversaries, okay?

g eat a a ays stud es s ad e sa es, o ay?

Well, if you're such a bad dude, then why aren't you on their bad-guy list?

Huh? "List of notorious villains...

...Plasmus, Overload, Johnny Rancid, the Puppet King"?

They only fought him once. I'm a recurring villain.

So are you like, the Robin of the group?

No, I'm the leader of the team.

And we're done talking. We're taking you back to jail.

Not so fast. I came here to enact The Ultimate Titan Challenge...

...and I'm not leaving until I fight the Titans.

You wanna fight the Titans, you got it.

I've brought the ultimate weapons, made specifically for the real Titans.

You Titan wannabes don't stand a chance.

Victory will be mine.

[BEEPING]

Your efforts are futile.

This atomic-resistor capsule was built to defeat Starfire.

That would've worked on Starfire.

You got anything in there to stop me?

I devised this aerial-sensory detonator to intercept Robin's birdarangs mid-flight.

It will easily annihilate your puny arrows.

You were saying?

[SHRIEKING]

[MAS Y MENOS SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

How'd you do that?

o d you do t at?

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

I can't understand you.

Take that. And that.

Nothing happened. Must be the batteries.

[SCREAMING]

Spanish language converter.

I built that to be strong enough to contain Beast Boy's most powerful animal.

Let's see you get out of that.

He may trap Beast Boy. But not us.

I brought this cool magnetic-repeller for Cyborg, but who cares.

All these would've worked on the real Titans. It's just your powers are...

...stupid.

I don't wanna fight you any more.

[CHIRPING]

It's okay, Mr. Silkie. Papi's here.

Who zaps out in the middle of a fight?

BUMBLEBEE: We'll find him. Somehow.

[BEEPING]

[ON SCREEN] The Tower sensor detected weapons fired. Everything okay?

We had to deal with Control... Controlling Silkie.

He's eating everything. Must have eaten through one of the sensors.

Bad, Silkie.

Well, Starfire left plenty of food for him.

Uh-oh. I gotta go.

Why'd you do that? They're trusting us to protect the city.

You want them to think we're in over our heads...

...with some bad guy who didn't make the list?

We need to get more information on Control Freak.

[ALARM BEEPING]

[ALARM RINGING]

[PEOPLE SHOUTING]

Don't go in there, wait for the Titans.

We are Titans.

[expl*si*n]

BUMBLEBEE: Drop it.

Who is going to make me?

[LE BLANC GRUNTING]

[CLATTERING]

With the Titans out of town, I thought I had a chance.

We are the Titans. It is true.

I'd feel better if Control Freak were behind bars too.

Let's get back and...

[WHIRRING]

"Who are these guys?

So my chat-room chums, tell me...

...what do you know about the Titans East? Do you think they're real Titans?"

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: There's a Titans East?

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: IMHO, Robin's the only real Titan.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: These guys are just posers.

[GRUNTING]

"Did you see that? He talks to dolphins?"

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: So?

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: Beast Boy can be a dolphin.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: Yeah, Beast Boy rocks.

[MAN SCREAMS]

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

You look familiar.

Are you Starborg?

CONTROL FREAK: "Stingers, huh?

Well, Bumblebee's never going to be as cool as Starfire."

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: Starfire and Robin forever.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: Starfire should be with BB.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: No way.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: Big deal.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: Mas y Menos just go fast.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: I wonder if they eat fast too.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 4: LOL.

Thank you, Robin. I like your other costume better.

I'm not Robin, I'm Speedy.

"What do you think of the Titans East now?"

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: Anyone can say they're a Titan, doesn't make it true.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: Who decides?

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: They should have matching jackets.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 4: There should be a test.

There should be a test.

This stinks, nobody even knows who we are.

So what if the kid didn't know your name. Let it go, Robin.

MAN [ON SCREEN]: Before I knew it I was surrounded by dolphins...

... and some guy in a unitard pulled me out of the water.

"Some guy in a unitard"?

Let it go, Unitard Guy.

We're here to protect the city, not for the recognition.

- And there's still a villain on the loose, so... CONTROL FREAK: Greetings, Titans East.

Your evil nemesis is back.

Looks like he found us.

That's right, I'm back.

And this time I have masterminded the New Ultimate Titans Challenge.

Bring it on.

MAS: Where are we?

I don't like the looks of this.

CONTROL FREAK: Welcome, Titans East. After much analysis, I have created...

... a series of events re-designed to challenge your specific powers.

If you succeed, you will have proven your worth as Titans.

But failure will mean that the city, the real Titans trusted you to protect...

... will be destroyed.

[LAUGHING]

[ UG G]

Oh, didn't I mention...

... the New Ultimate Titans Challenge will be televised...

... so everyone can watch your defeat.

Welcome to the New Ultimate Titans Challenge.

We're gonna find out just how real the Titans East are.

Each of our Titans wannabes...

... will attempt a physical challenge designed specifically for him or for her.

Bumblebee, the little bee who packs a big sting.

Speedy, whose fantastic arrows perform awesome feats.

Aqualad, bold and daring marine marvel.

And Mas Y Menos, the tiny twins with amazing speed.

Let's see how these Titans do when we challenge their superpowers.

Bumblebee, your challenge:

An expl*sive device has been attached to the bottom of the 12:02 express train.

Unless you can stop the train before it gets to 1st Street, the device will go off.

No problem.

CONTROL FREAK: This collar will keep you from getting any big ideas.

Let's see you stop a train...

... when you're the size of a fly.

Aqualad, on the other side of the reservoir is a t*nk filled with polluted water.

I diverted the flow of water so the polluted water is headed straight for the reservoir.

If you cannot shut off the valve in time, the city's water supply will be contaminated.

Piece of cake.

CONTROL FREAK: While fighting a ferocious shark?

CO O : ile fig ti g a fe ocious s a ?

Did you forget, I can speak to animals?

No, which is why I devised a mechanical shark who only listens to my commands.

Get him, Glen.

Mas Y Menos.

For you, I have created an amazing race through the city.

If you are able to push these two buttons located across town from each other...

... then you will stop my device.

Okey-dokey. We got it.

But you have to touch both buttons at the same time.

Which means you can't be touching.

BOTH: How can we be in two places at once?

[HORNS HONKING]

CONTROL FREAK: Speedy.

Your challenge is to fend off my indomitable incoming missiles.

If you cannot, the Bay Bridge will be annihilated.

Uh-uh-uh. No arrows.

Come on, kid. You can do it.

[GRUNTING]

[CONTROL FREAK LAUGHING]

That's my friend, Speedy.

CONTROL FREAK: "I have devised the perfect challenges for these second-rate Titans."

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: I could have thought up better challenges.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: Yeah, a mechanical shark has been done a thousand times.

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

Maybe Aqualad found a way around my mechanical shark.

But there's no way Bumblebee's gonna stop the train in time.

[GRUNTS]

CONTROL FREAK: What is she doing?

Next stop, 1st Street.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: She stopped the timer.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: Guess you didn't think about that, Control Freak.

We could build a slingshot.

We'll get a thousand clothespins and string them together.

I've got it.

The Titans East are clever, no? That is how they captured moi.

CONTROL FREAK: "He used himself as an arrow. Unbelievable."

CHAT ROOM CHUM 1: You never said he could use himself as an arrow.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 2: Hey, don't be a Titans-East hater.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 3: Titans East are cool.

CHAT ROOM CHUM 4: Bumblebee and Aqualad forever.

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

[ON SCREEN] You guys were so cool.

I mean, I didn't think you could pull it off, but you did.

I can't believe the bad guy zapped himself in front of us.

Uh-oh.

Your Ultimate Challenge has been canceled.

[SIREN WAILING]

All right, Titans East. Now that I know what you're capable of...

...I'm gonna make things even harder for you. I'll be back.

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

I got reports of missiles, expl*sive devises, and a...

...mechanical shark?

Don't worry, Sparky. We've got everything under control.

Great, I knew you could handle it.

It looks like we're gonna be gone for a while. You mind staying longer?

BUMBLEBEE: No, this place is beginning to feel like home.