01x12 - Dream Moms

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Raven's Home". Aired: July 21, 2017 - present.*
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Best friends Raven and Chelsea are together again and raising their three children under one roof.
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01x12 - Dream Moms

Post by bunniefuu »

(R&B song plays on radio) You are one good-looking sandwich.

Yes, you are.

Yes, you are.

Look at you.

Thick slice of ham What you hiding underneath there? Lettuce? Juicy, old tomato.

If eating you is bad, I don't wanna be good.

(clears throat) Starting to worry you've been single too long, sweetie.

No, Chels, I love being single.

Means I don't have to share my sandwich.

Oh, it's my song! This is my jam! Yeah, La Dee Da, the best girl group of all time! What! (vocalizing) I said, hey, head out into the nightlife Ready for having a good time Wanna do whatever feels right - Yeah, yeah! - Uh, uh! Come on, Mom.

Gonna use what I got tonight Don't back that thing up in the kitchen.

(music continues) Or anywhere! - All right, Chels, party's over.

- (music stops) (laughs) Hey, Ma, I need you to pick me up 500 ice cream sticks for a school project.

Oh, when's the project due? - Tomorrow.

- T-tomorrow? When were you gonna tell me? I just did! Hey, honey, what you looking for? I need to feed Kenneth before school.

Ugh.

You know what? I cannot wait for you to take that snake back to school.

I hate snakes.

Don't worry, Ma, he'll be gone by Monday.

Has anyone seen my bag of dead mice? - I put it right next to the ham.

- What? So you gonna eat that? I might never eat again.

Ohhhh Hey - Yo Let me tell you somethin' Had my vision all worked out But then life had other plans Tell 'em, Rae It's crazy when things turn upside down But ya gotta get up and take that chance Maybe I'm just finding my way - Learning how to fly - Yeah, we're gonna be okay - Ya know I got you, right? It might be wild, but ya know that we make it work We're just kids caught up in a crazy world - C'mon! - It's Raven's Home - We get loud! - It's Raven's Home It's our crowd! Might be tough, but together we make it look good Down for each other like family should It's Raven's Home When it's tough It's Raven's Home We got love 'Cos no matter the weather, ya know we gon' shine There for each other, ya know it's our time (Raven laughing) Yep! That's us.

(laughing) Excuse me, Mr.

Alvarez? - Oh, hi, Nia.

- Hi.

I wanted to talk to you about my science test.

Yeah, that was a tough one to hand back.

- I wish you'd kept it.

- (laughs) I've just had a really hard time with this genetics section for some reason.

Oh, Nia, I know it can be intimidating, but science is just asking a question and then performing an experiment to answer it.

It's all about the results.

There's no right or wrong.

Well, in that case, would it be wrong for you to change this "D" to an "A"? (laughs) Very wrong, actually.

I could get fired.

No, I-I didn't mean You know what? Good talk.

Listen, if you want to write an essay on genetics, you know, do an experiment about characteristics in your family, I could give you some extra credit.

Seriously? Thank you so much, Mr.

Alvarez.

I really appreciate it.

Hey, it's the least I can do.

(chuckles) It's all I can do, really.

I'm a middle school science teacher, Nia, I don't have much power.

How about this? We'll switch out Levi's regular soap with joke soap and turn his whole body green.

That's not an experiment, that's a prank.

It'd be funny though.

Hey, check this out.

"Genetic similarities and differences in twins.

" That's perfect! You could write something about you and Booker.

I have kind of wondered If Booker and I are twins, how come he's psychic and I'm not? What makes him so special? Maybe he's not special.

Maybe you have powers too, but he just did something to make it work.

That's it! That'll be my experiment.

I'll see if I have the same genetic power as my twin brother! Man, you wanna be like Booker? This "D" really messed you up.

Look, Chels! One last stick, then I'm finished with Booker's project! You know, I thought you and Booker were going to work on that project together.

So did I.

Levi, do you see it? No, but he's got to be in here somewhere.

Just don't tell my mom.

She'll k*ll us.

- (loud) Why would I k*ll ya? - No reason! There's go to be a reason.

There's always a reason.

What's the reason? Really, Mom, it's nothing.

Oh, Rae, they're lying! There's a snake on the light! - (hissing) - (screaming) Quick, we need something to catch him in! (Raven whimpering) - Hurry! - Where'd he go? (snake hissing) (high-pitched scream) Snake on the foot! (screaming) Careful, you're gonna scare him! Scare him? He's a snake.

He's made of fear.

He got away.

- He's over there! - (Raven screams) - I got him! - Wait! No, wait! I got him.

Quick, Levi, bring me something to put him in.

Here we go.

Good boy.

Whew! Now, that was close.

That could have been a real disaster.

(crunches) Get up.

Get up! Get up! Get up! Look what you did.

I worked all day on this.

Oh, Mom, you didn't have to do that.

I changed my project.

I'm writing a paper now.

- I'm gonna k*ll him.

- No, no, no! No, no, no.

Rae, Rae, Rae.

Look.

Look around, boys.

Look what you did.

Yeah.

Listen, we have been working all day.

We've been doing your laundry, cleaning up after you.

I built a bridge for you that you were supposed to help me with.

You have no appreciation for anything.

Listen, both of you, go to your room.

- But we really - No "buts"! Go to your room.

Listen, Rae, if it makes you feel any better, that bridge wasn't really your best work.

Wow, I've never seen my mom that mad before.

I have, in the grocery store.

But, in my mom's defense, that lady had over 15 items.

I can't believe they think we don't appreciate them.

We appreciate them.

Well, we don't tell them or show them, but, tshh, they know.

I don't think they do.

Maybe we should do something, you know, to really show them that we care.

Yeah.

Get on the computer and search for "what moms like.

" (keys clacking) All that's coming up is pictures of scented candles and firemen.

Well, search to see if anything fun is happening in town.

Food truck festival, book fair, some band called La Dee Da playing in Old Town tonight.

La Dee Da? Isn't that the band they were listening to this morning? Honestly, I can't keep up with what the grown-ups are into these days.

Yeah, Mom and Aunt Chels love that band.

We should buy them tickets.

I've got some leftover cash from my birthday.

What about you? I do have a little Tooth Fairy money burning a hole in my pocket This is perfect! Only one problem.

We don't have a credit card.

Tshh, don't worry.

I know someone who does, and they've bought their way out of trouble with my mom lots of times.

Thanks, Dad! You're the best.

We'll send you the cash (laughs) unless you want me to keep it.

(laughs) (seriously) I'll put it in an envelope tomorrow.

Hello, Mom.

Hello, Auntie Rae.

You both look lovely.

(whispers) Jump in.

I'm terrible at small talk.

Here, this is for you.

You got this flower from the vase on my dresser.

You can't give me something I already own.

We just wanted to apologize for messing everything up earlier.

You were right.

We haven't been appreciative.

But that all ends now.

Today is officially "Mom Appreciation Day".

Yeah, they're saying all the right words, but something doesn't feel right.

We have a surprise for you.

We wanna take you out, but you can't go dressed like like that.

You just said we look lovely.

Sorry, I was just trying to warm up the room.

Well, I don't know how I feel, because, you know, I've been cleaning up all day, and I think I just wanna chill, - light a scented candle - Ooh.

Look at pictures of firemen.

No, no, no, no.

Trust me, you're gonna love what we have planned.

Okay, okay, well, how do I do my hair? Do I do it like Saturday night, - or Sunday morning? - Hey! Just bring both wigs and you can decide when you get there.

So, how's it going? Well, there's a lot of stuff under here, and something snarled at me.

But, I found it.

This was the shirt Booker was wearing the day he got his very first vision.

Ugh.

It's like wearing one of Booker's feet.

Are you sure you really want to do this? Yes, I have to.

It's my experiment.

I'm gonna do things just like Booker and see if any of it triggers my power.

That shirt's triggering my gag reflex.

Okay, now I have to get into Booker's mindset.

How you gonna do that? Well, by doing what he does every single day.

I'm gonna say something I think is cool and then not make a basket.

Grab an umbrella, 'cause the Splashmaster General's about to make it rain! What does that mean? It doesn't matter.

He just turns his brain off and then talks.

Huh.

Probably just luck.

It's cupcake time! I thought you were supposed to miss.

I'm trying.

Thanks for visiting Mount Swishington! Now we're playin' donkey ball! Upload that to Hoopstagram! We're bakin' maskets! Man, how does Booker not make these things? I think I know.

He stinks at basketball! Oh, boys, this better be worth it.

You had us walk three blocks blindfolded.

It was only supposed to be one block, but we went the wrong way.

Okay, you can look now.

Oh, great.

Oh (gasps) Rae, look who it is! No way! No way! No way! Surprise! It's your favorite girl group of all time, La Dee Da! (screaming) - We bought you tickets.

- What? - Oh, my goodness.

- I can't believe it.

This is amazing! So, does this mean you're not mad at us? How can we be mad at the boys that got us La Dee Da tickets? I don't think we're ever gonna be mad at you again.

Well It worked better than we thought.

This concert fixed everything.

I know this is gonna break your hearts, but the concert is canceled.

(audience clamors) Come on, Rae, let's go elbow our way to the front, all right? You clear a path, I'm gonna carry the drinks.

Yeah! Um, actually, we're gonna hang back a sec and go to the bathroom.

- But I don't have to go to the bathroom.

- Yeah, you do.

Okay, well, y'all stick together and, uh, wash your hands.

Yeah! Both of them.

La Dee Da, here we come! What's going on? I had a vision that the concert's gonna get canceled.

It can't get canceled.

It's the only reason our moms love us again.

I know.

We need to sneak backstage and tell La Dee Da how much our moms need this show! - Come on! - Wait! Now I actually do have to go to the bathroom.

(humming tune) All right ladies, there are 2,000 screaming fans out there waiting for La Dee Da to give them the show of their lives.

And our fans are the reason we're here, 'cause we don't get paid until after the meet-and-greet.

Now, come on, Dee, door.

Da, makeup kit.

What was that thud? I think I found the thud.

That's Da! She's in the band! The show's about to start.

She can't go on like this.

Levi, I think we're the reason the show gets canceled.

- Excuse us! - Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse us! That's cute.

Do that later.

Excuse me! Excuse us! (singsongy) Oh, yeah, b*rned you.

(both screaming) Front row! This is amazing! Selfie! You're so cute! (laughing) - Oh, wow.

Chels? - What? What would you do if La Dee Da saw us dancing perfectly, and asked us to perform on stage with them? I would throw up, Rae! I would literally throw up.


Oh, those boys are so sweet for getting us tickets.

I know, I can't believe how long they've been in the bathroom.

Yeah, we should go check on them.

We're in so much trouble.

We never should have come backstage.

Ugh! We can't take them anywhere! I knew this was too good to be true.

What? What's too good to be true? I just saw the boys getting in trouble backstage.

What? We're returning them, Rae, I don't know where, but we're gonna return 'em.

We are.

Excuse us! Coming through.

We'll be back, though.

- Anything yet? - No.

Not a vision, or a weird feeling? Nothing? Wait.

Wait, I'm seeing something.

That stack of books on the desk is gonna fall right now! Okay.

Right now! You were right! It didn't work.

None of this stuff worked.

So what if Booker has visions and you don't? Why does it matter? He's my twin brother, Tess, and he has this amazing power that makes him special.

I guess I'm just not special like that.

- Is she okay? - I think so.

Yeah, I can feel her breath.

I can smell it, too.

Got to get you some gum when you wake up.

This is bad! La: Da, are you ready? Someone's coming.

There.

(humming tune) Oh! Da, you asleep? Well, are you gonna get dressed? Are you giving me the silent treatment? Is this because I've been secretly dating your ex-boyfriend? I should fire you for that, but I actually respect you for it.

Hurry up and get dressed.

We are on in five! - What was that thud? - I don't know.

(gasps) I think we found the thud! What? Oh, my goodness, it's Dee! Hey, Ma.

Booker, what are you doing here? We just wanted to make sure you guys had a great night, to show you how much we really appreciate you.

But we're in so much trouble.

We never should have come backstage.

We ruined everything.

Oh, my head.

She's waking up! Hey, Ms.

Da, we're super sorry, but you need to get up on that stage.

I don't think I can.

Me neither.

Ah.

Rae, this is awful.

They can't have a La Dee Da concert without Dee and Da.

No, you can't.

Un unless you can.

(audience cheering) (loud cheering) Where are those girls? Rae! We're in La Dee Da.

I know, Chels.

Don't throw up! Took ya long enough.

Let the b*at rock Turn it up now I said, hey, head out into the nightlife Ready for having a good time Wanna do whatever feels right Gonna use what I got tonight Just give me a b*at and I'm gonna be free Be me, working my body Put a request in the DJ He play what I say, I'm going crazy Shake your body, body, body Look at them, they're k*lling it out there! If we were any other family, we would have called the paramedics and run.

(laughing) - Say hey, turn the music on, let it play - Who are you? - What? Oh, I'm Raven, and this is Chelsea.

We're your biggest fans.

Do you mind if we take a selfie real quick? - Yeah, one.

- Okay, smile.

I got it.

- Security! - Wait, wait, wait! - No, no, we're good.

- Raven: Okay, good.

Ahhh, ha, ha! Okay, all right, all right.

Okay, let the Okay, I got the kids.

Thank you, sir, thank you.

(women squeal) Did you hear that crowd, Rae? They were cheering for us! Ooh, I don't know if that's true, but I'm gonna pretend it is.

Me, too.

I don't care if we're banned from this theater for life, you guys were amazing out there! - Thank you.

- Everyone was so impressed, they promised not to press charges.

Yeah.

Tonight was so much fun, you guys, but you know you don't have to do something huge like that just to show us you care.

But you do so much for us.

Yeah, and all we do is drive you crazy.

You do, you really do, but I'm gonna tell you a little secret: I drove my parents crazy, too.

Yeah, Grandma told me.

You know, if you really want to make us feel appreciated, you could do little things, like wash the dishes, without having to be asked.

Oh, yes, or you could fold the laundry.

Or just say "thank you.

" We can do that.

Oh, now.

You want us to say it now? Yes.

Thank you.

Yeah, thank you.

Switch! - Come here! - Oh, I love you boys.

Whoo! Hey, Chels? - What? - Tonight was lit.

- Yeah, it was! - (laughing) Come on, let's go to the car.

Wait, you have to show us where the car is.

You walked us here blindfolded.

Oh, yeah, it's this way.

- So much fun! - I wanna do it again.

- Next week.

- Yeah.

No, no, it's definitely this way.

Nia, I just finished reading your extra credit paper.

Look, I know it wasn't very good.

I didn't prove anything.

Also, I might have spelled my name wrong.

Sometimes my computer auto-corrects it to "Narnia.

" No, Nia, this paper was exceptional! And the further research you did to explain why you have genetic differences from your brother? That was very, very impressive.

Really? I helped.

Just in case you wanna throw a few of those extra credits my way, Mr.

Alvarez.

Ah, ha, ha, ha.

I'm concerned about your peer group.

Don't worry, she's harmless.

Mostly.

I think you were having trouble connecting to the material in class, but you did that in here.

You showed a real grasp of the scientific method.

That's not even taught until ninth grade.

So, I get the extra credit? This paper will bring your score up to a "B.

" But, I have one more request: I want you to check out one of my honors science classes.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

If I did that, they'd have to invent an even lower grade for me.

When's the last time you handed out a "Z"? I think you'd do really, really well.

You have a scientific mind.

You just need to learn to unlock it.

I'll think about it.

Listen, you may not have the "hoop skills" that you wrote about your brother having, but that paper was a slam dunk.

(laughs) Don't tell the other students how funny I am.

I need them to fear me.

You used "hoop skills" instead of "psychic powers" on your paper? I didn't want Mr.

Alvarez to know Booker's secret.

I'm just glad he bought it.

If he ever sees Booker on that basketball court, he'll know I was lying.

Come on, let's go.

Something weird happened at that concert.

A lot of weird things happened at that concert.

I know.

I mean, my vision of La canceling her show didn't come true.

That's never happened before.

Maybe I can stop bad things from happening.

Levi, what are you doing? Kenneth isn't in his cage.

Together: Oh, no! Kenneth, Kenneth, you leave me alone! (hissing) Snakes can't climb.

I am so happy.

Oh, he's climbing! He's climbing, he's climbing.

Chels! He's climbing! The snake is climbing!
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