04x15 - Kings of the Con

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Crashing through
the crowded halls ♪

♪ Dodging girls
like Ping-Pong balls ♪

♪ Just to reach the bathroom
on time ♪

♪ Leaping over laundry piles

♪ Diapers you can smell
for miles ♪

♪ Guy's got to do
what he can to survive ♪

- ♪ In the Loud house

♪ In the Loud house

- ♪ Duck, dodge, push,
and shove ♪

♪ Is how we show our love

- ♪ In the Loud house,
in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ One boy and ten girls

♪ Wouldn't trade it
for the world ♪

- ♪ Loud Loud Loud

♪ Loud house

- Poo-poo.

[upbeat music]

♪

[panting]

[grunting]

[knock at door]

- I got it.

- Sorry, Lynn,
I don't mean to be rude,

but it's an emergency!
- [grunts]

- I don't know why
he didn't just pee outside.

I would if I could.

all: We know!

- Lincoln!
[panting]

- Clyde, it's okay.
Take your time.

- [exhales]
Thanks, buddy.

- Lana, not on the begonias!

- Look, I got the program

for tomorrow's
Ace Savvy Convention!

Check out the prize
for best cosplay!

- "The con-goers with the most
authentic character portrayals

will be named
Kings of the Con,

and win a cameo in the next
Ace Savvy movie!

[gasps] The movie?

- ♪ Ace and Jack

[together]
Time to deal out some justice!

- Cut!
That was brilliant!

[gasps, panting]

- We have to win!
- I know!

We're the biggest
Ace Savvy fans ever!

Who else can say they wrote
an issue of the comic?

- Just one tiny problem.

Do you think
our Ace and Jack costumes

are good enough to win?

- Well, I did just upgrade
my poker chip blaster.

[beeps]
[both yelping]

Whoops. I'll recalibrate it.

- That'll definitely help.

But, you know,
there will be

a lot of Ace and Jacks
at the con.

- We need something
to set us apart.

Something no one else has.

- Hmm.
- Hmm. [gasps]

[together]
Jackpot.

- Thank you for joining me.

One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven,

eight, nine--
Someone's missing.

- [grunts]
What's the dealio, Stinkin'?

I'm in the middle of a set.
[grunts]

- Have a seat.
- Yeah.

[clears throat]
As you guys know,

Clyde and I are going to the
Ace Savvy convention tomorrow.

- Don't care.
- Didn't know.

- Okay.
- And?

- And, of course, we'll be
going dressed as Ace and Jack.

- But we thought,
why hog all the fun?

Why not invite you guys
to come, too,

as your characters
from our comic,

"The Full Deck."

- Featuring the High Card,
the Eleven of Hearts,

the Night Club,
the Joker,

the Strong Suit,
the Eight of Spades,

the Royal Flush,
the Queen of Diamonds

the Card Counter,
the Deuce!

- Sorry, can't.
- I'm busy.

- Likewise.
- Totes have plans.

- I got a hot date with Bobby.
- Middle of session, man.

- Wait, wait, wait.
Did we mention

that if we win best cosplay,

we get to be in
the next Ace Savvy movie?

- Movie?
Like, a real one?

- Not the kind
you and Clyde make

in the back yard
with your little toys.

- They're called
action figures, and no.

This is the real thing.
On the big screen.

- That's, like, a huge deal!

- I will prance around at your
weird convention all day

for the chance to be in
a Hollywood movie.

- Literally--
[talking over each other]

- Yes, yes!
- Fantastic!

Okay, if we're going to win,

we need to turn you into
Ace Savvy experts.

The bad guys,

and this baby's called
the High Roller.

It's got horsepower,
gull wing doors.

- And the latest in front
and side airbag technology.

[phones chiming]

- Hey! You guys were supposed
to silence your phones.

Who are you even texting?

- Leni, that's not how
you spell "bored."

- Sorry, guys, but we've been
listening for hours.

When do we get to the costumes?

[upbeat jazzy music]

♪

- You guys look perfect!
To the con!

- Whoo-hoo!
Rock 'n roll!

[screams]

- Nice use of your jetpack,
Night Club.

- This is actually pretty cool.
- Wow, this is incredible.

- What's that?
- Hmm, interesting.

- Wow!
- Ooh, it's a creature.

- That outfit--I want it!

- Hey, pal. You gotta wait
in line to see the Kitty,

just like everybody else.

No cuts!

[cat screeches]

- Who's the Kitty?
Is it a real cat?

- Lana, we went over this
in our presentation.

- He's the most
vicious villain

in the Ace Savvy universe!

- Ohh, I have to pet him.

- Sorry, Lans, no time.

We gotta focus
on impressing the judges.

They decide who wins
Kings of the Con,

So keep your eyes peeled
for two people in orange vests.

- Would you say
it's a traffic cone orange

or more of a clementine?

- Good job, Leni!

Action poses, go!

- Oh, wow.
This must be the Full Deck

from issue number .

Very impressive.

- No!

My chips!
- Ah! [grumbles]

[grumbling]
- Sorry!

Well, the important thing is
we got their attention.

And they really seemed
to like your sisters.

- True.
And then they stand out,

it's good for all of us.

We're one step closer
to being in that movie.

- Wish I could
just fix this belt.

Oh! Oh! Ah!

- Is anyone around here
savvy enough

to ace this challenge?

Try and guess how much this jar
of poker chips is worth

and win a gold poker chip.

- Ooh, here's a chance
to impress the judges.

- Ace and Jack
are on the case.

- So if the green chips
are worth $ ,

- And we have to think
about the volume of the jar,

minus the air, plus the--
- That's $ , .

And if you give me a moment,

I can convert it to
cryptocurrency.

- Wow. You're exactly right.

- Impressive work.

You really live up to
your name, Card Counter.

- Thank you. Though the credit
for my character

belongs to my brother, Lincoln
and his compatriot, Clyde.

- Co-authors of issue .

- Happy to sign a copy for you.

Ugh, this pen!

[both laugh nervously]

Okay, guys, we gotta get back
in front of those judges.

- I don't see them anywhere.

- [gasps] Clyde!

- Uh, there!
They were in my blind spot.

- Ladies and gentlemen,
boys and girls,

try out
the Hammer of Justice.

Impress everyone
with your super strength.

Step right up.

- Perfect. Here's our chance
to make up for last time.

- Careful, Ace.
Go easy on 'em.

[straining effort]
Ah!

[breathing heavily]

[grunts]
[beeping]

- You are as strong
as the Old Maid.

- Don't worry, Stinkin,
I'll teach this game

for calling you old.

[screams]

Huh!

- Oh!
- Ah!

- Whoo!

- Wow! Guess that's why
they call her the Strong Suit.

Let's get a picture.

- How about one
with the Full Deck?

Get in here, girls.

all: Selfie!
[shutter clicks]

- [sighs]
Well, even if we have to

ride my sister's coattails,
we'll still be in the movie.

- You're right. Just keep
picturing my name in lights.

- Okay, I know the day's
not over yet,

but for me,
there's a clear winner

for Kings of the Con.
- Same here.

Okay, say your pick on three.
One, two...

[together]
The Full Deck!

- [gasps]
- Yes!

- Ugh, but what about
that Ace and Jack they're with?

- Eh, I'm not that impressed.

I don't think
we need to include them.

- Hey, you wanna take a break
in the judge's lounge?

I hear there's donuts.
- Oh, yeah!

[together] No!

- I can't believe this.

My sisters are going to be
in the movie and we're not!

They wouldn't even be here
if it wasn't for us.

- Don't give up, buddy.
We got this.

The judges haven't made
their final decision yet.

- You're right.
We still have time

to show them
what Ace and Jack can do.

You guys have been working
so hard.

- You must be starving.
- No thanks.

They're charging bucks
for a corndog and a cape.

- It's my treat.
- Well, in that case--

all: Thanks!
- Thanks, Linc.

- There goes
all my souvenir money.

- Sorry, buddy.
It'll be worth it.

Now where did those judges go?

- Get your revenge
and dunk the Card Shark!

- [laughs]

- Bingo.
Here's our chance to wow them.

- I got this. I'll turn my
blaster from ding to demolish.

- [imitates fanfare]

Watch out, Card Shark.

You're about to get Jacked!
- Hi-ya!

[coin clatters]

- T-try it again.

[coin clatters]
- [laughs nervously]

Here, just use this.
- [grunts]

- Wow, kid.
- Wait!

Uhh, we got something here.

Hi-ya!
[crashing]

- Uh-oh.

[water splashing]

- Well, if the judges
had stuck around,

I think they would've been
impressed with our mopping.

- Don't worry, Clyde. We'll
find another way to wow them.

[both gasp]

- High roller fans, huh?
[chuckles]

You boys wanna see
what it feels like

to sit inside?

- This is our chance.

We can show off our
encyclopedic knowledge

of Ace and Jack's
custom ride.

[together]
Yes, we do!

- Engaging camouflage mode!

[beeping]

[upbeat music]

Whoops! It's a little different
from the movie.

- [laughs] Actually, boys,
I'd prefer if you didn't--

- Engaging flight propellers!

- Whoa!
[all screaming]

[grunts]

- Uhh, maybe it's this.
- Uh, maybe this?

[siren wails]
- No, no, no, no!

No, no, no, that one!
The red one!

[both shouting]
- Ahh! Ahh!

[screams]

[grunts]

- Well, now I'm pretty sure
the judges hate us.

If we're gonna turn thisaround,

we've gotta think of
something brilliant.

- Yeah, and we've only got
an hour to do it.

- It's gotta be something big.

- Something
only Ace and Jack can do.

Something like--
- Solving a crime!

- Ooh, now that's brilliant!

But where do we find
a crime to solve?

- We make one.

- No one will hear us in here.

Now to think of
the perfect crime to solve.

- I'll get us
the deluxe package

to buy us extra time.

Plus, it comes with
all these fun backgrounds.

- Attention all con-goers:
sorry to disappoint,

but the Kitty is officially
done signing autographs.

- Darn. I was kinda still
hoping we'd squeeze that in.

- Wait, Clyde, that's it!

Let's catnap the Kitty.

- I know we want
an autograph, but--

- No, I mean,
this is the perfect crime

to get the judges' attention.

- Hmm. Normally,
this level of deception

would give me a stomach ache.

But we have no choice.

- All we'd have to do
is hide the Kitty for a while,

let the panic build up,

then you and I track him down
and rescue him.

- We'd be heroes.

The judges will forget
all about the Full Deck

and name us Kings of the Con.

- Come on, the Kitty's trailer
is this way.

- Wait, our pictures!

Oh, look. This is the one
where you got your idea.

And this one is where
I was questioning it.

- The Kitty's not taking
a dime less

than what
the Card Shark's making.

♪

Are you sure
you don't need backup?

- I got this. Nana Gayle
calls me the cat whisperer.

Hello, Mr. the Kitty, sir,

would you mind
getting in this crate?

Or, as you might say,
meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.

- [screeching]
- Ahh! Ow, ow!

Not my Crime Eye! Ah!
[groans]

[thud]

Let's move on to plan B.

[groans]
- Uh, uh,

sorry to bother you,

but some sponsors
wanted to send over

a complimentary caviar dinner.

We've got it all set up
over here.

- Huh?

- Here's our tasting menu.

Might I recommend the--
now, Lincoln!

- Ha!

[screeching]

[both grunting]

[grunting]

[screeching]

[hisses]
- Whew, we did it.

[screeching]

Maybe we should
give him some alone time.

- To being Kings of the Con!

- We just pulled off
the biggest heist of all time!

[both laugh]

- [gasps]
- Attention con-goers:

the Kitty has gone missing.

If you encounter him,
please do not engage.

He is highly stunt-trained
and really dangerous.

[all gasping]

[both gasp]

- Okay, time to be heroes.

[both gasp]
Oh, no.

He escaped!

He must've picked the lock
with his claws,

just like in
the fourth Ace movie,

"Meow You See Me."

- What do we do meow?
I mean, now?

- Well, technically,
we can still be the ones

to rescue the Kitty.

We just made our jobs
a lot harder.

- True, but maybe
my cat knowledge can help us.

Come on!

- So cats really like popcorn?
- Big time. At my house, we can

barely get through a movie
without a cat

getting in the bowl.
[meowing]

[meowing, munching]

It's working!

[meows]

[beeps]
- ♪ Ace and Jack

- [screeches]
- ♪ Ace and Jack

♪ Save the day
- No, no, no, no, no!

Why did I add that feature?

[growls, retches]

[both gulp, scream]

- Uh, did you know

the Kitty could actually
sh**t hairballs?

I thought it was
all special effects.

[both grunt]

Got our supplies.
One Ace and Jack flying drone,

one Ace and Jack Pillow,
and one Old Maid jumbo pencil.

- That was all of your
souvenir money, wasn't it?

- It's okay.
It had to be done.

[upbeat music]

- Hey, not bad!

You think he'll fall for it?
- Oh, yeah.

My cats att*ck anything
with feathers.

My dad had to get rid of his
fun hat collection. [tisks]

- Okay, Kitty,
come and get it!

♪

[screeching]

Oh, no!
Surprise aerial att*ck!

[growls]
[crashing]

Good thing I brought back-up!

Hi-ya!

[dramatic music]

Really?
That did nothing?

- It messed up his fur
a little.

- He's armed with catnip!
Hit the deck!

[growls]
[beeping]

[both coughing]

Dang it, he gave us the slip!

- Or did he?

Looks like someone
is shedding for the summer.

Follow that fur!

♪

- Clyde, up there!

♪

[screams]

[struggling efforts]

- Wait, it's just rope.

[struggling efforts]
[blows landing]

[hisses]

Take this!

Darn, I only had
four chips left.

You mind throwing those back?

- Uh, oh, he's reloading!

Go, go, go!

[panting]

[growling]

[laughs, inhales]

[both scream]

Oh, no, Clyde!
I'm stuck!

- Me too!
What do we do now?

Help!
- Somebody!

[upbeat dance music]

[chatter]

- Ah, no one can hear our cries

over the pumping
of that sick bass.

- I've got an idea.

Can you help me
get my mask off?

[straining]

Fling it at that light.

We're sending my sisters
a signal.

- Huh!

- Thanks.
- Lemme just check it

before you tag us.

- Ah! I always have
double chins in these pics.

- [gasps]
What's that in the background?

- Does no one remember this
from our con prep?

That mask means
Ace and Jack are in trouble.

Someone needs our help.

- Well, what the junk
are we standing around for?

Let's go save some butt!

- It looks like the signal
is coming from that stage.

- How are we gonna
get over there?

- On it, dudes. Yah!

- Well, that's great for Luna,
but what about the rest of us?

- Oh, I've got an idea.

♪

[engine roars, tires squeal]

♪

- Oh, sh**t!
Where's the windshield wipers?

Uh, this one?

[disco music]
[squeals]

[squealing]
- [screams]

- Yes! Nailed it!

- Lori, watch out!

- Oh, no!
- [screams]

[all scream]

- Dudes, it's Lincoln
and Clyde!

They're up there!

- Wait for me!

- Lincoln,
if this is really the end,

I gotta tell you...[gulps]

I went to Dairyland
with Rusty once.

- [gasps]
- It was only 'cause

you were grounded.
- It's okay, buddy.

[hissing]

[both scream]

- Yo, furball, down here!

- Kitty,
meet your worst nightmare.

- Huh?

- A little help,
Eight of Spades?

- Gladly, Strong Suit.

- Ahh! [grunts]

- Throw.

- [screams]
- I'll grab the boys.

- Oh.

[screeches]

- Lincoln! Clyde!

[shrieking]

- Uh-oh.

- Hi-ya!

Ohh, you birdbrains
couldn't think of

a better w*apon than an abacus?

[hissing]

[screeches]
Yah!

Oh, never mind.

It's actually quite effective.

♪

- Eh, gross. Hairballs.

I thought it was Lana's job
to deal with these.

- Ooh, save me one,
would ya?

[meows]

[growls]
[hisses] Prepare to face

the Royal Flush!

Aww, you're such a cute boy.

Why are you so feisty, huh?
Do you need hug?

[screeches]
- Hey!

No one donkey kicks Lana
but me!

[grunts]

[screeches]

[percussive rock music]
[groans]

- Oh?

[screams]

[grunting]
Guys, I figured it out!

I'm free!
[squeals]

[screams]

- Hang on, Leni!

The Joker will save you
from this cat-tastrophy.

[laughs]

[screams]

[growls]

- Give it up, Kitty.
This ends now.

[screeches] Ha!

- Oh, no! Litter cloud!

[coughing]

[growls]

[both scream]

[screeches]

- Kee-kee! No! No!

- We've been saved
by the Deuce!

- Yay, Lily!
- Ace, the crate!

[grunting]

- Keep 'em coming, Lily.

[screaming]

[grunting]

Nice job, Jack.

- Are you guys sure
we have to crate him?

I think he was just playing.

all: Lana!

[crowd gasps]

- We heard fighting!
- What is going on over here?

[both gasp]
You boys found the Kitty!

- You're heroes! Ohh, just like
the real Ace and Jack.

- Hmm?

- Well, I think
it's safe to say

We have found
our Kings of the Con!

[cheers and applause]

- Wait, so we're
out of the movie?

- I guess so.
- [all groan]

[somber music]

♪

- Um, we need
to say something.

It's just--we don't exactly
deserve to be Kings of the Con.

[together]
Huh?

- We found out the Full Deck
was gonna win it without us,

so we catnapped the Kitty
so we could "rescue" him

and impress you.
[all gasping]

[together]
Oh!

- We just really wanted
to be in the movie.

- Lincoln!
- How could you?

- But now we can see
how dumb that was,

and we're so sorry.

- Especially to you,
Mr. the Kitty, sir.

Still a huge fan.

- [hisses]
- [screams]

- Watching you guys in action
was incredible.

You really do deserve
to be Kings of the Con.

- Well, I think you two
can exit the stage now.

Can we get the girls over here?

- Okay, the Full Deck
is officially Kings of the Con!

And that's final.
[cheers and applause]

- Whoa! Stage dive!
[screams]

- Smile big, everybody.

This is for
the movie press release.

- Get a better angle.
- Get me picking my nose!

- You boys ready
for your photo?

- What photo?
- You're in the movie, too.

- We don't condone
what you did.

But you really made a splash
with the fans,

so we came up
with a small role for you.

- What is it?
- Ace and Jack's

crime-fighting nephews?

- Nope. The Kitty's personal
pooper-scoopers.

He's really looking forward
to working with you.

[both whimpering]

[laughs]

- ♪ Cramped inside
this tiny space ♪

♪ May sound bad
but ain't the case ♪

♪ In the Loud house
- ♪ Loud house

- ♪ Duck and dodge
and push and shove ♪

♪ That's the way we show
our love in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ Loud house

♪ Laundry piles
stacked up high ♪

♪ Hand-me-downs
that make me cry ♪

♪ Stand in line
to take a pee ♪

♪ Never any privacy

♪ Chaos with kids

♪ That's the way
it always is ♪

♪ In the Loud house