05x02 - High Society

[bunniefuu]

♪ Unh, unh, unh, I been
puttin' in the work ♪

♪ Ain't no tellin' what I'm worth ♪

♪ I been duckin', I gon swerve ♪

♪ Got 'em buckin' in the burb ♪

♪ I just spend lots of paper ♪

♪ Still got plenty for later ♪

First week of college,
and I'm already in my bag.

Transition's going smooth,

and I've already met some
interesting new people.

♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪

Like Annika Longstreet.

♪ Ooh, nana, ooh, nana ♪

♪ Ooh, nana, eh, ah ♪

♪ I been running all day, ooh, nana ♪

JUNIOR: She's someone who's always felt

that she was bigger
than wherever she was.

♪ Ooh, nana, ooh, nana ♪

♪ Ooh, nana, eh, ah ♪

If the girls she grew up with

were Destiny's Child...

she needed to be Beyoncé.

♪ Eh, ah ♪

She is the living manifestation

of decades of female empowerment...

the civil rights movement...

and Oprah having her own network.

There is nothing she
didn't think was possible.

♪ I been puttin' in the
work, ain't no tellin'... ♪

Because no matter the challenge,

Annika was up for it.

♪ Got 'em buckin' in the burb ♪

Are you sure you want to run for office?

You're just a freshman.
No one knows you.

They will.

And Cal U was gonna be the place

where she started her journey

to making sure
everyone knew her name.

Okay, "Uh-nee-kuh."

It's Ahh-nih-kuh.

♪ Watch out, world, I'm grown now ♪

♪ I'm grown ♪

♪ Learn something new every day ♪

♪ I don't know, so I'mma feel my way ♪

♪ Got the weight of the world on me ♪

♪ But no regrets, this is what I say ♪

♪ Watch out, world, I'm grown now ♪

♪ I'm grown ♪
♪ You can tell me ♪

♪ My heart b*ating so loud ♪

♪ Mama, look, I'm grown now ♪

♪ I'm grown ♪

Guys! Exciting news.

I'm running for class secretary,

and I've just come up
with the perfect slogan.

[Ding!]

"I'm With This Bitch."

Well, yeah, Annika felt like

- "I'm With Her" was kind of played out.
- Oh.

We just came from the
Clubs and Activities Fair.

I didn't run for student government,

but I did check out
the campus improv scene.

- Really?
- Yes.

And you guys should stop by.

I went by. I only made it half a lap,

and some rep tried to pitch
me on going into pediatrics

after med school, but
I'm not so into chil...

Feet?

- No. Children.
- Huh?

I don't know why you
guys want to join a club.

My sister Zoey told me that
clubs are for commuter students

and people who can't
get into off-campus bars.

Come on, bro. Join something.

You gotta commit to the
college experience...

you know, ball games, tailgating,

getting our stomachs pumped.

I mean, that's what we're here for.

- Ehh...
- Mm, speak for yourself.

I am here because my
dead immigrant grandma

would rise from the grave if
I didn't get a college degree,

and it was hard enough getting
her in there the first time.

And I am here to get that
paper so I can get that paper.

You know what I'm sayin'?

There's only so much you can do

and so much you can
make without a degree.

ANNIKA: Come on, guys. Think bigger.

Do you really want to just be
a doctor or a marketing exec

making boring ads that
people just skip over?

Excuse me. Boring? Have you ever seen

our Stevens & Lido
skydiving tampon commercial?

That campaign was submitted
for an Adweek Award, thank you.

And do you know how hard
it is to "just" be a doctor?

I'm not insulting doctors.

I'm just saying, if you're
gonna be a doctor, be Dr. Phil.

That feels like you're
insulting doctors.

- Mm-hmm.
- Look at Rihanna.

She could just drop incredible albums,

but to become Rihanna,

she had to have Savage and Fenty.

So your "Umbrella" is
"I'm With This Bitch"?

No.

I'm just saying that this is my play

to get tapped by The Crest.

Uh...

You do know that Cal
U has a secret society, right?

Absolutely.

- He doesn't.
- I don't.

Well, it's our version
of Skull and Bones,

and it's a proven path
to becoming a senator,

a C.E.O., or even president.

Once you're in, you're on
your way to running the world.

Mm. You know what? I'm good.

What you just described

does not sound
like it's for Black people.

Well, neither were the
Oscars before Halle Berry.

♪♪

Did she just compare herself to Halle?

- I think so.
- ZAARA: Yep.

♪ I got the moves, yeah,
I got the juice, yeah ♪

AARON: First day, already
the face of the university.

Hmm.

- ♪ Yeah, moves that make lil' mamas shake, ankles break ♪
- _

- ♪ Moves that make my pockets fat ♪
- _

- Okay, Zo.
- ♪ b*at that money, andale ♪

- _
- ♪ I'm ballin' like Jrue Holiday ♪

- _
- ♪ Pack my bags, move out of state ♪

♪ Like, I'm so fly, I'm outer space ♪

♪ You got a move, I'm in a blitz, whoa ♪

DOUG: Professor Jackson!
Professor Jackson!

I'm your biggest fan! Will
you sign my ass for me?

- [Laughs]
- Congrats, brother.

You're a fool, man.

- What up, boy?
- What's up, what's up?

Hey, funny thing...

- I've actually done that.
- What?

A woman got a tattoo of my signature

after an Afro-Salon
event in Johannesburg.

So, what are you doing here?
Quick coffee run for the office?

You know, you should
make it a coffee slow walk

so that you don't spill anything
on your new super pastor suit.

Oh, very cute. He thinks
I'm an errand boy. We'll see.

No, come on, bro. I think
you're an errand man.

Oh. Well, actually, I'm
getting coffee for myself.

I don't do grunt work, just grinding.

All right, look, no shade. I just...

I figured, you know,
that's what assistants do.

I mean, typically, yeah, but not me.

I mean, I'm beyond that.
I'm on my Oprah sh*t.

- Oprah?
- Yeah.

That's who you're going with?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

Well, you know, you could have
said Steve Jobs, Warren Buffett,

- Floyd Mayweather.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

The point is, I'm k*lling
it at work right now.

I mean, they've got me
handling stuff around the agency

they usually give to
people three titles...

three titles above my level.

I'm on course to have my
five-year plan down to a three.

Maybe / .

- That's a good look.
- Thank you.

- Proud of you, man.
- Thank you.

You know, you also could
have said, uh, Bob Johnson,

Jack Dorsey, Tyler Perry.

These are all great options.

Hey, looking good,
Assistant Professor Jackson.

Hey! Feeling good, Dean Watson.

How you guys doing? Welcome, welcome.

Ah, I swear, sometimes
it's just too easy.

You know what? I don't have
a problem with school spirit.

I'll flip a cop car when we
b*at Cal State Rancho Cucamonga.

[Indistinct shouting]

Whoo!

Just kidding. I'm Black.

It's just with this being
my second go-round at school,

I don't have time to mess around.

I know what I'm here for.

I'm here to get my degree and get ou...

What... [Grunting]

What the... ?

♪♪

All right, look, if you're
holding me for ransom,

just call my dad, Andre Johnson Sr.

Tell him you have Virgil
Abloh's last pair of Off-Whites

in a size , narrow.

He will wire you any
amount of money you need.

FEMALE VOICE: Andre Johnson
Jr., you've been chosen.

For what?

The Crest.

♪♪

Cool.

Make sure you vote for me. Thanks.

Oh, my God, Junior.

You should have been here last night.

They finally figured out
who pulled the fire alarm

- in the middle of the night.
- It was Tasha Wong.

But, I mean, if she didn't
want to hear people going at it,

she should have just gone to BYU.

Yeah, that's true.

Where were you, bro?

Oh, I was just out.

You know, just being out
and about. It's whatever.

Well, you're smiling like
you just found your G-spot.

What is up with you?

It's nothing.

You know, I just had some
things that I had to handle.

[Chuckles] Some secret things...

that happen in a society.

Wait. Did you get tapped
by a secret society?

- Hmm.
- Hold on.

Did The Crest tap you?

Oh! She got it out of me.

- You got into that Illuminati cut?
- Yes, sir.

Ooh, we up! Let's go.

- I got shotgun on your next Elon flight.
- Got you, bro.

Wait. Heh. What's happening?

Are you a "Johnson & Johnson" Johnson?

Because if not, this
literally makes no sense.

I don't know. I guess they
just saw something in me.

Something undeniable. So...

- Undeniable?
- Mm-hmm.

Like a Tom Ford aviator
undeniable? Hardly.

They chose you because you're
a non-threatening Black man.

What?
- You heard me.

You're the safe choice, Barack.

I am hardly a safe choice.

Raised in the suburbs,
private-school education.

You make them look good
while increasing diversity.

Plus, they know you'll never
rock the boat... Barack.

Okay, you keep on saying "Barack"

like it's an insult
when it's definitely not.

Of course not. Barack.

Okay, Annika, look.

I am sorry that they didn't choose you,

but I don't know what
I can do about that.

♪♪

[Scoffs] What?

Wow. Finally a cold front in SoCal.

Um, well, I'mma dip, 'cause...

I'm with that bitch.

♪♪

♪ I'm a big, big, big, big, big, big ♪

♪ I'm a big sh*t ♪

♪ I'm a big, big, big, big, big... ♪

Amazing! You're k*lling it.

- k*lling it!
- Incredible work, guys.

In-credible!

This is a disaster.

You took the words right
out of my mouth, Robin.

[Singsong voice] Full train wreck.

This day. We haven't
gotten the sh*t yet.

And now Glossier wants a
whole new graphics package

- for their campaign.
- [Cellphone buzzes]

Is there anything I can do?

Yet another fire to put out.

ROBIN: No, no. That's
not what I told you.

[Camera shutter clicking]

♪♪

Can I make a few suggestions?

- And who exactly are you?
- Oh. Doug.

I'm one of the Account... Executives.

Junior Account Executive.

- I'm part of Robin's team.
- Mnh.

Look, this right here,
this... This isn't hot.

This is kind of giving lukewarm.

But I have some ideas to
give it a little energy.

So let's get into it.

You're sure about this?

Trust me. They're gonna love it.

♪ Big, big, I'm a big sh*t ♪

[Indistinct conversations]

♪♪

There's the face of Cal U!

[Chuckles] Guilty as charged.

Ahh. The face of Cal U. That's funny.

♪♪

MAN ON TV: ... this commercial break.

ANNOUNCER: At California
University of Liberal Arts,

we pride ourselves on
being the intersection

of academics and culture.

What the [bleep]?

California University,

where you'll see yourself.

"Educated Black Minds Matter."

You see that?

I told you, you should
have trademarked it.

T-the only reason I came back to Cal U

is 'cause I was promised
that things would change.

% of this college is Black.

Of that %, % are athletes.

There's a lot of work
to do, but these ads,

they make me feel... exploited.

Bro, it is time to man
up in the real world.

You've always been this disruptor,

so go out and disrupt some sh*t.

We're grown-ass men.

It's time to get out there
and take what we want.

I mean, respectfully and
consensually, of course.

I'm glad you added that.

No one's gonna give
our generation anything.

Look, if I wasn't on my game,

I'd be getting coffees like
the rest of these assistants,

but instead I'm running photo sh**t.

Okay, so... what you're saying is,

I need to dust off the orange jumpsuit.

I'm saying... I don't think
the people at this university

know what Assistant
Professor Aaron Jackson

is capable of until you tell them!

Bet.

- Buck the system.
- Right!

- Be a doer!
- Exactly!

Because... W-What is that old saying?

Those who can do and those who can't...

- Teach.
- Yeah.

Your words, not mine.

♪♪

Sometimes you're really
bad at being a good friend.

I know Annika was disappointed

when she wasn't chosen for The Crest,

but she was way out of line
when she went off on me.

I know who I am, and I am not safe.

I speak my mind.

I let the Reddit boards know

how I really feel
about the "Snyder Cut."

Maybe they see some greatness in me

I didn't even see.

[Glass clinking]

Congratulations to the future
leaders of Cal U and America.

Welcome to The Crest.

ALL: Cheers!

- Yeah!
- Whoo!

[Applause, glasses clinking]

This is incredible.

I feel like a Batman villain.
In the best possible way.

- Hmm.
- Hey, man.

- Hey.
- Hey. I'm Kyle.

Junior. Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

Hey, look, I'm sorry for the whole

- "hood over the head" thing last night.
- Oh.

When they did that to
me, I was ready to fight.

Some things you just can't
do to a Black man, right?

It's true. My whole life
did flash before my eyes.

It was a lot of me playing video games.

[Chuckles] Man.

When I look around this room,

I see the people we'll be
building the future with.

You know, when I got to Cal U,

I was all work, but it's interesting...

I can really think about my place here.

Maybe I could be the
next sh*t-caller, huh?

Ah, that's why you
came to college, right?

Ah, it wasn't. But I'm down now.

You know they haven't let a
lot of us in places like this,

but it's good to see things changing,

because the sky is the limit now,

and this is your ticket
to changing the world.

Being a C.E.O., a judge,

maybe even the second
Black president... Barack?

Again with the "Barack".
What is up with that?

I get it... I'm eloquent, I am dashing,

but if there's one thing
I am not, it is safe.

I mean, I will rock the boat.

♪♪

Hey, so, it's great that all
the efforts towards diversity

are really paying off,

but we could be doing more, right?

- What do you mean?
- I mean, for starters,

opening things up for more
Black kids who didn't grow up

in the suburbs or go to
a private high school?

If we're gonna run the country,

we need to look like the country.

There's someone you should consider.

Annika Longstreet.

- Annika Longstreet?
- Yes, man!

She is smart, focused,
pathologically driven

in a way that is a
little scary, honestly,

but I think she is perfect for you guys.

Look, I get what you're doing,
but that's not gonna happen.

Why not?

Let's just say that everyone can see

that she's not right for us.

You are, and that's why we chose you.

Oh, man. You just gotta get to know her.

She is great.

And if it's about numbers,
she can even have my spot.

This isn't covering a shift
at the Olive Garden, Junior.

Don't let the Louboutins
and the Gucci fool you.

She's just not one of us.

And The Crest isn't about to go ghetto.

[Guests gasp]

Let's see Barack Obama do that.

Ow.

Okay, maybe that's not
exactly how it went down.

[Rewinding]

And The Crest isn't about to go ghetto.

Well, then The Crest isn't
about to get Andre Johnson Jr.

♪♪

[Chuckles]

I was driven here blindfolded,

so I'm definitely
gonna need a ride home.

Yo, yo. What's the
good news on the sh**t?

Did you tell the Creative Director

- that you were in charge?
- No.

I mean, I let him do his thing
and I added some ideas in.

He almost quit.

Do you know how insulted he
was to have some college kid

come in and tell him how to do his job?

I'm not a college kid.

And you're also not
an Account Executive.

I don't think this is working.

No. Look, Robin. We...
We can figure this out.

I've been doing really good here.

I thought I was helping.

Robin, this is a big mistake.

We can get past this.

Oh, I'm way past this.

You can get your final
check at the end of the week.

Thanks.

Ohh.

♪♪

♪♪

What?

I came to say that you were wrong.

I am not the safe Black choice.

I almost punched a guy
who's probably gonna decide

whether or not we go to Mars

or where the next World Cup is gonna be.

I'm not joining The Crest.

Well, there goes any chance
of you ever going to Davos.

- What's Davos?
- Oh, my God.

If you have to ask, it just
proves you don't belong.

Okay.

Look. I'm sorry I went
at you for getting in.

I was just jealous.

All my life, I've wanted

something more than I've had, you know?

Going to college and getting a good job

just isn't enough for me.

I want that elevator ride to the top.

I want things that no Black
girl has ever dreamed of.

That way, maybe there'll be
a little Black girl out there

who can dream beyond what I can imagine.

I know whatever you end up doing,

you're gonna inspire a
lot of people, Annika.

Thank you.

You know, it was kind of nice

to dip a toe into the idea
of belonging to something,

you know, knowing some
people would have my back.

Maybe I should find a club to join.

Well, whatever you do, do not
join the John Birch Society.

They make The Crest look like Howard.

[Chuckles] But, seriously,

we need to find someplace
that we can rock with.

We have to find our people.

♪♪

Assistant Professor Jackson.
The big man on campus.

Yeah. Uh, about that.

All of the, uh, banners
and the bus ads...

Research has shown they've
been very effective.

Yeah, but they all...

Well, don't they all seem a bit much?

I don't follow you.

I told you, the
university is very excited

- that you've come back home.
- Mm-hmm.

But "Educated Black
Minds Matter," it just...

It sounds a little demeaning

to actual educated Black minds.

Well, we're a changing university.

Two years ago, you shut
down your own graduation.

- Yeah.
- Now you're an assistant professor.

I... [Sighs]

I just don't know if I want
to be the face of all this.

So just take me off.

Aaron.

To do what I need to
do, I can't play it safe.

I'm sorry, but y-you brought
me back to this university,

and I have to stay true to me.

Hope you can understand.

JUNIOR: So what is college for?

Maybe it's to see who you are...

♪ I'm touchin' down ♪

... if you're someone
that rocks the boat.

♪ Pull up on you ♪

Is it time to level up

and meet the challenge
of your generation?

♪ Don't make a sound ♪

[Knock on door]

Is it time to dream...

♪ Cannot be found ♪

♪ I got two seats ♪

♪ We got tonight ♪

♪ She up on me ♪

♪ We up all night ♪

You just gonna stand there...

or are you gonna let me in?

♪ You trying to get her back ♪

♪ I'm Kobe with the steal ♪

♪ MIA, MIA-A ♪

♪ MIA, MIA-A ♪

♪ MIA, MIA-A ♪

♪ Back in your city, yeah, pullin' up ♪

... or become more realistic?

♪ MIA-A ♪

♪ MIA, MIA-A ♪

Maybe part of what college is about

is just your experiences
and the people you meet.

♪ MIA-A ♪

♪ MIA, MIA-A ♪

♪ Back in your city, yeah, pullin' up ♪

♪♪

Which makes me think...

maybe I do need to find my thing.

You really said that to
Dean Watson? Good for you.

Look, bro, this is
tenure-track talk, right?

So I just told him it wasn't
cool to exploit us like that.

You can't use my face
and not hear my voice.

You think he took it to heart?

%. I just...

I told him what it was
and what it should be,

and that was it, you know?

Well, I can tell you what
it is right now.


[Aaron sighs]

Well. [Scoffs]

Let's just hope they change
the ones in the bathroom.