02x13 - I Want to Be Alone

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

♪ Here we are, face to face ♪

♪ A couple of silver spoons ♪

♪ Hopin' to find
We're two of a kind ♪

♪ Makin' a go
Makin' it grow ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ Takin' the time each day ♪

♪ To learn all about ♪

♪ Those things
You just can't buy ♪

♪ Two silver spoons together ♪

-♪ You and I ♪
-♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ You and I together ♪

So, we take the December
sales figures

for Eddie Toys and move them
over to the gross volume column.

Oh! I see, then we subtract
the December expenses

to get the net figure.

Exactly! Isn't it beautiful?

Ah, Dexter, what do we do
with these figures here,

do we enter them
into the next fiscal year?

RICKY: Let's take a closer look.

Ah-ha, um-hm.

Well done! Kate, Dexter...

thumbs up!

[SIGHS] Ricky, don't you
have something to do?

Ar-- We are trying to work here.

Kate,
I've got a serious problem.

I'm bored!

Well, ugh!
Don't you have any homework?

[SCOFFS]
That's how bored I am Kate.

I did it already.

Well, why don't you play
video games or watch TV?

Well, I'm bored of them,
and there's nothing good on TV.

I mean, we have 37 channels

and the best show
was on the Japanese station.

Bowling for Yen.

[WATCH BEEPING]

Ah, excuse me!
I have a business call to make.

One of my clients is trying
to convince Orson Wells,

to come out with a line
of designer jeans.

They're for porkly people.

I've come up with a great name
for the jeans.

Wide Loads.

[RICKY SIGHS]

I've got an idea.

Why don't you clean
up your room?

Kate, I said I was bored,

I didn't say I was crazy.

[TRAIN HORN BLARING]

-Hi, guys.
-Hi.

Guess, why I'm carrying
a brand new fishing pole.

BOTH: Uh...

Buzz! Sorry, time's up.

The answer is,
because we're going fishing.

-All right!
-KATE: [SQUEALS] Wonderful!

Now, aren't you gonna ask me
where we're going fishing?

-Where?
-Where?

Gee! I had a hunch
you'd ask me that.

Well, the skinny is--

See one of my top
toy designers, Bill Whiffle,

the inventor of the bill ball...

he owns an old
rustic kinda mountain cabin

right on the shores
of Lake Goochiwampus.

Now, Bill isn't using
that cabin this weekend,

so, he's offered it
to us to use.

-[SQUEALS] Oh!
-That's great!

[EXCLAIMS]
However, there is one big catch.

-What?
-What?

We've got to want to use it.

-[INHALES] We want! We want!
-We want! We want!

All right!
Then let's not waste time.

There's food to be gathered,
there's clothes to be packed,

there's fishing gear
to be fished out and...

geared. Let's go.

[TRAIN HORN BLARING]

-Let's go.
-Come on.

Tell Mr. Wells, I've come up

with a nifty slogan
for his jeans.

"If you can't resist
a-la mode,

then pry yourself
into Wide Loads."

Yes, I'm glad you like it.
Good-bye.

[EXHALES] D-- Dexter,
I got some great news.

Dad, Kate, and I are gonna
spend a weekend in

a terrific mountain cabin
right next to a lake.

-Congratulations.
-[CHUCKLES] Thanks.

I'm gonna be fishing,
hiking, canoeing.

A minute ago,
I didn't have a thing to do.

Now, I'm gonna have too much
to do.

Isn't life a kick in the head?

Yes, life is a kick in the head.

That's why I own stock
in several aspirin companies.

Well, this weekend's
gonna be great.

What're you gonna do?

Well, let me check
in my calendar.

I have only one thing scheduled.

"Give my canary a bath."

Well, uh, aren't you gonna be
with your girlfriend?

No, I'll be alone this weekend.

She'll be out of town,
attending a seminar on

"the moral decay
of our society."

Really?
Where is the seminar being held?

In Las Vegas.

Okay, Saturday you're gonna
give your canary a bath.

Now, what about Sunday?

Well, I think I'll read
this month's issue
of Money Manager Magazine.

It always has some extremely
exciting articles in it.

[DEXTER CLEARING THROAT]

"You, too, can grow vegetables
on your unused cemetery plot."

[CHUCKLES]

This is your weekend?
[CHUCKLES]

You're gonna read
a magazine and...

wash your bird?

That's right.

Dexter I-- I hate the thought
of you being alone so--

Why don't you come
and join us this weekend?

You mean
that cabin in the woods,

nestled in the wilderness,
next to a tranquil lake?

-Yeah, would you like that?
-Good Lord, no.

Why not?

-Well, I don't like the country.
-How come?

Because it's not in the city.

But that's the whole point,
to get away from the city.

I mean, there's a lot of neat
stuff you can do up there too.

Beautiful scenery, wildlife.

I'm not a very big fan
of wild animals.

I'm even a little reluctant
to use this duck phone.

Dexter, this would
be the perfect chance

for us to become better friends.

We'll have a good time,
hang out together.

You'd wanna hang out with me?

-Yeah.
-Well, I'll tell you what?

Next Monday, why don't you come
over to my office?

I'll give you an accountant's
green visor,

some sleeve protectors,

we'll see what's new
in the tax laws.

Uh--

[SIGHS] That--
that'd really be awesome.

But it seems to me

that this is the perfect time
for us to get together.

[EXHALES, INHALES] Well,
the thing is, I'd really hate

to intrude on a family occasion,
Richard.

-Come on.
-Now, Richard.

-What are you doing?
-[RICKY GRUNTS]

Richard, hold on, don't push.
Don't push.

Hey, Dad! Dad!

-[CHUCKLES] Hey, Dexter.
-Hello, Edward.

-RICKY: Uh.
-What's up, son?

Dad, can Dexter come to the
cabin with us this weekend?

But Richard, I'd r-- r-- listen,

I'd really hate to intrude
on you guys, Edward.

Oh! Don't be silly.
It's no intrusion,

we'd be glad to have you.

-But-- But.
-See I told you, Dexter.

-But-- But--
-Hey, Kate, good news!

Dexter wants to come
to the cabin with us.

-Oh!
-"Wants" is a little bit strong.

Wonderful!
The more the merrier.

-Yes, but-- but--
-Yeah, I better get another rod.

Oh! And I'll get another
sleeping bag.

Yes, but-- but-- [GRUNTS]

But what Dexter?

Richard,
I don't belong up there.

There are no sidewalks.

No taxis, no Perrier.

Don't worry.

Believe me, you'll fit right in.

[♪♪♪]

Wow!

Ooh!

Ah!

Good Lords!

Is this great or what?
[CHUCKLES]

There's no "what" about it.
It's terrific.

-Ooh! I love this place!
-KATE: Yeah!

What about you, Dexter?

Oh, it's wonderful.

[EDWARD COUGHS]

Dex, please, that bug spray
smells terrible.

I'm sorry. That's why I brought
my air freshener.

Dexter, aren't you a little
uncomfortable in that suit?

Oh, this is my traveling garb.

Now that I'm here,
I will, of course,

change into something
a little more Daniel Boone-ish.

Hey, guys, a pot-belly stove.

-EDWARD: Hey!
-Hear some great

ghost stories, around this baby.

DEXTER: Dust!

Hey, a great old stove.

I have always wanted to cook
on one of these. [GASPS]

Ooh.

Sure wish I had a vacuum.

No problem.

-You brought a DustBuster?
-Didn't you?

Darn! You know, no matter
how carefully I pack,

there's always something
I forget.

Hold it! Nobody move!

Got it!

Thank you, Dexter, for saving
us from that vicious dust ball.

Well, I believe in stomping
first, asking questions later.

Kate, let's go for a walk
around the lake.

-Oh, I'd love it.
-What are you guys gonna do?

Well, uh, I dunno? Uh,

Wh-- What do you want
to do first?

I know what'd be fun.
[CLEARS THROAT]

Let's hang up these.

Dexter, you've been here
five minutes,

you've already k*lled
12 forms of life.

Dexter, I-- I really don't want
to spend the whole day

hanging up No-Pest strips.

Listen, I'm sorry, whatever
you wanna do is fine with me.

Why don't we hop in the canoe,
and go fishing?

Except that.

What's the matter,
you afraid you'll fall in?

-[CHUCKLES]
-[CHUCKLES] You got it.

Dexter... [SIGHS]

...you told me you bought
a brand-new fishing outfit.

So, why don't you try it on

and get into the spirit
of the occasion?

We're gonna have a great time.

And nothing is going
to go wrong.

Trust me.

[♪♪♪]

Trust me, huh?

[DEXTER SIGHS]

[COUGHS]

[BREATHES DEEPLY]

Dexter, I warned you
not to stand up in the canoe.

The seat was damp.

And the lake wasn't?

Anyway, it was lucky
you're a pretty good swimmer.

That wasn't swimming.
That was panicked flailing.

I get goose bumps,

every time I think of the fact
I was immersed

in water where bugs have babies.

[SPITS, COUGHS]

Listen, Dexter, we--
we can still have a good time.

Want to go outside
and pick some berries?

I don't know.

-Dexter...
-[BLOWS NOSE]

Nothing can possibly
go wrong this time.

Trust me.

[♪♪♪]

Trust me, huh?

Dexter, how could
I have possibly known

that right in the middle
of our berry patch,

there would be a spring?

Oh! Not just a spring,

a hot spring.

A very hot spring.

[DEXTER EXHALES]

DEXTER: Oh.

Listen, Dexter, I owe you one.

I mean, I might have gotten
wet, too,

if you hadn't yelled out,

"Oh, God, I don't want to die."

Always glad to be of service.

I-- I'm going to go see
if my other clothes are dry.

-EDWARD: Hi, Dex.
-Hi, Dex.

Says you.

What's the matter with him?

Uh, he--

he's kind of had
a rough day, Dad.

You see.

First we went fishing,
and he fell into the lake and...

then we went berry-picking,
and he fell into a hot spring.

Oh, what a shame.

Well, at least there's nothing
else for him to fall into.

[DEXTER SCREAMING]

[WATER SPLASHING]

Except the well.

[SIGHS]

Dexter, ar-- are you okay?

I'm f-- fine, I'm fine.

[COUGHS]

Well, it'll be a beautiful
sunset tonight.

After you've warmed up,
we can go outside--

Oh, no. I don't want
to go back outside.

Please don't make me!

All right, we'll stay inside,
right here.

Bless you. [SNEEZES]

-Bless you.
-Thank you.

-[COUGHS]
-RICKY: Ah.

Well-- well,
why don't we play a game?

-Good idea.
-How about 20 questions?

Terrific!

Dexter, since you had such
a rough day,

-we'll let you go first.
-DEXTER: Very well.

[DEXTER SIGHS]

-What do I do?
-Okay, well,

you have to think of something,
and we get 20 questions

to guess what it is.

All right, uh, I'm thinking
of something.

-Start guessing.
-Oh! Can I guess first?

-Sure.
-Ah, is it a mineral?

No.

[CLICKS TONGUE]
Is it a vegetable?

Yes.

EDWARD: A vegetable,
a vegetable.

Uh,
is it a green vegetable?

Oh, no!

All right, it's not a green
vegetable, take it easy.

[CHUCKLES]
Is it a leafy vegetable?

I don't believe this.

I'm trying my best.

Well, is it a tomato?

It's a bear!

Dexter, we're supposed
to guess what it is.

Yeah, and besides,
you said it was a vegetable.

It's a bear!

All right, it's a bear,
I'll think of something.

It's a bear!

Dexter, you-- you've already
had your turn.

Yeah, if you don't wanna play,
at least don't ruin it for us.

Please, listen to me.
There is a bear behind you.

-KATE: Oh, God!
-[ALL SCREAM]

EDWARD:
All right, all right, all right.

Just, just, just, just, just
remain calm, now there's...

Bears are used
to being around people. He's...

he's probably very gentle.

[BEAR GROWLS]

Or not.

What we need here is a plan.
Any thoughts?

I-- I'm open to suggestions.

Can I hear some voices?

[BEAR GROWLS]

Not yours.

[BEAR GROWLS]

All right, quick,
I need a w*apon.

[BEAR GROWLS]

Maybe we can sneak out the door.

Good idea.

[BEAR GROWLS]

Now what?

Well, he's hungry. He's...

Probably leave after
he has some berries.

What happens if the berries
are just an appetizer...

and we're the main course?

Well, I, for one,
have had just about enough.

-Dexter, shh!
[WHISPERS] Not so loud!
-You'll make him angry.

I refuse to be intimidated
by a beast.

-[BEAR GROWLS]
-Oh, shush!

Don't interrupt me
when I'm talking to you.

Now listen, you,
I happen to know the owner

of the Ringling Brothers Circus,

so, I suggest
you make yourself scarce,

or you may spend the rest your
life wearing a clown collar,

tooting a toy horn,
and riding a unicycle!

Now, march! March!

You, march!
Get out of here! That's it.

Step lively! Come on.

Hup, two, three, four! Hup.

Shoo!

You were wonderful! [LAUGHS]
Whoa!

Take it easy, take it easy.

[DEXTER MOANS]

What did I do?

-RICKY: Really--
-You saved us!

-You were terrific!
-How do you feel?

[DEXTER SHIVERS]

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Palpitations.

Uh, try taking
some deep breaths.

Hush! I don't dare,
with my luck,

if I open my mouth
something tiny

with far too many legs
will fly into it.

Wel-- Can I--
can I get you anything?

Some concrete, a skyscraper.

Oh, what I wouldn't give
for a whiff of smog.

I'm sorry, Dexter, I--

I really hoped
you'd like it up here.

Uh, I'm sorry Richard,
but I really don't.

But, if you stayed
in the city by yourself

wouldn't you be lonely?

[SIGHS] It's true,
I would have been alone,

but I wouldn't have been lonely.

You see... I'm surrounded
by people all week long.

At work,

at social gatherings.

So... [CHUCKLES] ...when I get a
rare weekend alone,
I treasure it.

I know what you mean,
I've felt that way myself.

-[KATE SIGHS]
-So, have I.

You know,
when I was in m*llitary school,

I lived in the dorm
with 20 kids.

And sometimes, I just wanted
to get away from them all.

Especially Ernie Lingpiddle.

And the shower problem.

What shower problem?

He never took one.

I'm sorry, I made you come here,
Dexter,

if you really didn't want to.

There's no need to apologize,
come here, Richard.

You said you wanted
to be my friend.

You asked me here
because you cared about me,

and I came
because I care about you.

Friends?

-Friends.
-[DEXTER CHUCKLES]

I'll tell you what, why don't
we drive back to the city,

and Dexter can have his Sunday,
all to himself.

You'd do that for me?

Why not?
Let's load up the car, come on.

-RICKY: Hey, Dad!
-EDWARD: What?

RICKY: You know what? I heard
there's gonna be a terrific

football game on tomorrow.

EDWARD: That's just fine!
Let's do that.

You know, Edward's a
good player, I've been
meaning to see.

EDWARD: All right.

ROCKY: Well then,
what are we waiting for?

EDWARD: Let's go!

[BEAR GROWLS]

It's not so bad here.

How about 20 questions?

[EDWARD GRUNTS]

[EDWARD GRUNTS]

Shh! Hold it!

What are you doing?

Checking for bears.

You know, Dad,

we could have still been locked
in that cabin

if it hadn't started to snow.

I know, for a minute there
I began to think that bear

was going to hibernate
in our station wagon.

Well, I think Dexter was happy
to return to civilization.

Yeah, I kinda got
that impression

when he got down on his hands
and knees and kissed his carpet.

[LAUGHS]

[EDWARD SIGHS]

Dad, there's something
I don't understand I mean--

How could Dexter
not like the woods?

I mean, we do,
we love the woods.

Yeah, I know what you mean, son.

When you really, really
like something,

it's hard to imagine
somebody else doesn't, but...

truth is, people are different.

Not everybody likes
the same thing.

That's right, Rick,
for instance, uh,

your father
loves Italian food,

and I don't.

Honey, I thought you loved
Italian food.

[CHUCKLES] No.

You love Italian food.

I do believe that I have
mentioned it before, dear.

But I thought you were joking.

I don't know anybody
who doesn't like Italian food.

Sweetheart.

Well, now you know somebody,
darling.

What's not to like
about Italian food?

There's pasta,
meat, cheese, tomatoes.

That's right, no matter
what you order,

it's pasta, meat, cheese
and tomatoes.

Guys, I get the point.
[CHUCKLES]

You telling me you
don't like veal parmigiana?

No.

Just like you don't like sushi.

EDWARD: It's raw fish,
honey.

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're going to find our way ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ Taking the time each day ♪

♪ To learn all about ♪

♪ Those things
You just can't buy ♪

♪ Two silver spoons ♪