01x02 - Soho's by You?

[bunniefuu]

[???]

Look at her.
Look at that little face.

Yeah. And she's our daughter,
and we get to take care of her

for the rest of our lives.

We get to watch her grow up
and become a young lady.

Yeah. Fall in love.
Get married.

Have children of her own.

I love it.
I love being a father.

Yeah, I love
being a father too.

Every morning.

[???]

? You can count on me ?

? No matter what you do ?

? You can count on me ?

? No matter where you go ?

? I'm standing by your side ?

? I'll be right behind ?

? No one loves you
More than I do ?

? Put your hand in mine ?

? I can see a part of me
In you ?

? A little something special ?

? That comes shining through ?

? I hear it in your laughter ?

? And I feel it when you cry ?

? I will be
Right there for you ?

? Until the day I die ?

? You can count on me ?

? No matter what you do ?

? You can count on me ?

? No matter where you go ?

? You can count on me ?

[THUDS]

[???]

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Hi, judge.
Hi, sweetie.

This is the child.
This is the child's smile.

If she ever answers the door
without it, call me.

Nicole.

Hi, Nicole.

Social worker?
Yeah.

You're going to
Yeah.

I'm never going
to see you anymore?

I wouldn't say never.

I'd just say that from now on,
you're mostly going to see--

Cindy? Hey.
Joey?

I knew I'd been
here before.

From now on you're mostly going
to see someone just like her.

But not her.
You'll be reassigned.

I understand.
Call me.

I understand.

This means you're going
to be on my case forever?

This means I'm going to be
on his case forever.

Shall I mail you a listing
of social workers

so you can place a notch
next to the familiar names?

Hey, judge.
Want to come see my room?

I love my room a lot.

Well, Nicole seems to be
acclimating nicely.

How would you say the remaining
family member is adjusting?

Oh, Michael?
He's doin' great.

Glad to hear it.

Yeah, he just walks around here

smiling all the time.

Pack your things.
We're moving.

What ever happened to
honey, I'm home?

I'm not home.
This is not my home.

It takes an hour and minutes
to get here after work

and that's traveling on the
luxurious subway of the damned.

And then-- Then when
I finally get here, I'm...

here.

Michael, why are you
starting this again?

Because I think Nicole
deserves to grow up

in the best possible
surroundings.

The loft is the best possible
surroundings.

This loft is
a warehouse, Joe.

You don't raise a child
in a warehouse

unless you want her
to grow up to be a truck.

Deep down,
they like each other.

You're a sweet child.

Judge.

You're here.

Hey, Joey.
The judge is here.

Ah, you probably knew that.

And just didn't tell me.

You little dickens.

Hi, Michael.
Are we moving?

First,
we're hugging.

Now we're moving.

Uptown. My apartment,
nd floor, high-speed elevator.

[SNAPS FINGERS]
Takes us right there.

We got an elevator
right here.

What we have is
a shoebox and a rope.

We're not moving uptown.

It's not fair
to uproot Nicole again.

Nicole just got here.
Her roots are this big.

We'll stick her
in a glass of water

and find her a cab with
southern exposure.

I think she'll survive
the move fine. What about you?

We're not talking about me.
I can survive anywhere.

Well, I think you've
demonstrated that, Joe.

Look, nobody
said that living here

was a permanent arrangement.

I have a nice place too, and I
think it's better suited to us.

Look--
Judge, where should we live?

That's not for me
to decide, Sweetie.

It's very important that
your fathers be left alone

to come up with
the proper decision.

And if they screw up,
I'll fix it.

[???]

See, Nicole, this is what
a real home looks like.

With walls and rooms
and washing machines downstairs

so you don't have to walk
to the river anymore

to bang your shirt
against a rock.

We'll all stay here
a few weeks,

and then we'll decide which
place you'd rather grow up in.

Wow. You can see
the whole city from here.

Yep.
Can you see the loft?

Nope. I paid extra for that.

Hey, Joey, come on.

Come on, Joey. Come on.
Come on. Yeah. Good boy.

So, what do you think?

I think everybody in this
building is wearing your suit.

Come on, just sh**t me, Michael.
Put me out of my misery.

Joey, I want to be
totally fair about this.

You give it one night.

You still don't like it
after a good night's sleep,

I promise...
I'll sh**t you in the morning.

The loft
has -foot ceilings.

I don't know how
you breathe around here.

How can you move?

Oh, and look at the stuff
on these shelves. Phew!

Hey, everything in
its little spot, huh, Michael?

Yeah.

[GROWLING]
Yeah. Chomp this guy.

[NORMALLY]
an interior decorator

and you haven't
touched a thing since--

[MAKES SWOOSHING SOUND]
--the day you moved in.

As a matter of fact, I move
things around all the time.

Hey, Nicole, so, what do you
think of this place?

You like this place
or the loft?

Or, uh-- Or this place?

I like them both
the same.

I like them exactly the same.

I can't believe how equal

my feelings are
about both places.

[CHUCKLES]
we've got here.

I think I'll go meet
the neighbor's kids.

The neighbors don't really
have kids your age, Nicole.

What age are they?

No age. No children
for the neighbors.

As a matter of fact,
this building has

a very interesting philosophy
when it comes to children.

What's that?

They don't let them in.

This is a no-children
building?

Yes, but I've been here
long enough

for my lease to pre-date
that ruling,

so we're fine with Nicole.

Why wouldn't they want us
in apartments?

[YELLING]
Are we loud? Is that it?

We're loud?

No kids allowed.
Where is this gonna lead?

[NORMALLY]
out of parks?

You going to keep us
out of schools?

I like it.

She's going to make
so many friends at school,

she doesn't need any
in the building.

Where does Nicole
go to school up here?

[SNAPS FINGER]
Already taken care of, Joe.

Woodcrest Day School.
The best private school in town.

I know. I went there.

What are you talking about?
You went to P.S. .

You sat right next to me.

Oh, that's right.
You know that.

But I wanted to go there.

And I want Nicole to go there.
I already set up an interview.

You got her an interview?

What if I think she should
go to a public school?

Joey, This is the best
there is, and we're here.

This is the kind of upbringing

I always wanted
to give my family.

This is my dream.

This is your dream?

Yeah. Well, except
you were going to be prettier.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Hey.
NICOLE: I'll get it.

Hi, judge.
Hi, sweetie.

Like our new place?
Oh, very nice.

Very uptown.

I've lived in one
just like it for a long time.

Really?

Twenty-seven years.

Pathetic, isn't it?

And who's this
at our door?

Oh, good. I found a
social worker before you did.

This is--

Gabrielle.

Michael.

Out.

Mr. Taylor. Come in.

Oh, this must be Nicole.
Do sit down.

And you are?

Joey Harris.
The other father.

Ah. Divorced?

No, we're living together.

Ah, well, whatever
the domestic structure,

you gentlemen have inherited
a very fine young student.

MICHAEL:
Then she is accepted?

However, the transcript shows

no extra-curricular activity
of any kind.

Mom worked late. I had to
help out around the house.

Now she has two parents,
and she'll have time

to join
whatever clubs you have.

I wish there was
something on her record

that would help her to more
closely fit the profile

of the well-rounded
Woodcrest student.

Yes, but surely
you can't reject Nicole

because she had no time
for field hockey.

Well, why don't I see what
I can do, and I'll let you know.

Hold tight, pal.
Here we go.

You know what
I do for a living?

I didn't actually imagine
that you were employed.

I am an artist.

And when I'm
not creating something,

I'm out there
playing basketball.

I'm nothing but
extra-curricular.

Don't you think two fathers
are gonna see to it

their daughter
knows how to play second base?

And how many of your
well-rounded students

can come into
a brand-new town

with brand-new parents
and still come up smiling?

Now, if your school
can make the mistake

of turning down a good student
and a good daughter,

then your school doesn't know
what well-rounded is.

Sir. Your school doesn't know
what well-rounded is, sir.

Mr. Harris,
I like your passion.

I hate your jacket,
but what of that.

Between you and Mr. Taylor,
Nicole's gene pool

is far too interesting
to pass up.

Then she's in?

She's in.

Joey, you did it.

I didn't mean to.

[???]

Real swell place,
isn't it?

Yeah, and they take
such good care of it.

You know, they vacuumed the
hallway two times already today.

So, what do you
want to do now?

I've got algebra.

Oh, I don't want
to do algebra.

But you should
do your algebra.

'Cause that's something
you'll probably use every day

for the rest of your life.

Just like I do.

I should be painting.
That's what I should be doing.

I just don't feel inspired
in this place. You know?

I feel like
this dead fly.

Banged his head
against the window times

trying to get out,
and now he's dead.

Come on, Joe. If I can work
here, you can work here.

Your work needs quiet,
my work needs life.

I need people around.
You know?

Hey.

I'm going to paint some.

Yeah. Great idea.
Yeah.

I'm going to paint you
some friends.

Really?
Yeah.

This building
may not allow kids,

but I do.
Who do you want?

A boy and a girl.

But I want the boy
to like me, so...

give the girl a mustache.

NICOLE:
we're allowed to do this?

They said no kids in the
building, not on the building.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Someone's at the door.

All right, nobody moves, okay?
Nobody moves.

Excuse me, I wanted
to let you know

there will be
a tenants meeting on--

Who are you?
Where is Mr. Taylor?

Oh, it's okay.
I'm the father of his child.

What do you mean?
What are you talking about?

[GASPS]
to Mr. Taylor's apartment?

Excuse me,
but this is my apartment.

I've got the right
to do my work in it.

You are living here?

MICHAEL:
Daddy's home!

Michael. Michael. Oh--
Hey, Nicole.

How's my little girl?
How's my--?

[SCREAMS]

Joe, would you know
anything about this?

Michael, these walls
were just plain white.

Now you've got yourself
an entire neighborhood.

Yes, but I don't live in
this neighborhood.

You think I'm fat.

Mr. Taylor, we have
a problem here.

The, uh...Bohemian seems
to think he lives here.

Michael, why do we have to

explain ourselves to
this person?

Because this person
is the president

of the tenants' association,

and she can have us voted
out of the building, Joey.

Well, my friends and me, we
vote her out of the apartment.

See, he's an artist.
And, uh, he's different.

We don't like different here.
Good day, Mr. Taylor.

What is wrong with you?

Perfection wasn't
good enough for you?

Because what we had here
was perfect.

Perfect what?
I had to paint Nicole friends.

I had to paint her a dog.
That's pitiful.

No, that's insane, Joe.

Let me explain something.
Do you see this?

This is fantasy.
This, reality.

Do you see
the difference at all?

Fantasy.

Reality.

You are over the edge.
Come back.

Grab my hand, Joe.
Grab my hand! Come on!

You can't breathe in this place.
You can't move in here.

I mean,
flies come here to die.

I don't want my daughter
growing up in this atmosphere.

I don't care where I live.

I understand that
I've done everything I can

to put Nicole in a good home
and a good school

and the only one who's
unhappy with that is you.

Let's go out
for a hamburger.

I also understand you
deliberately tried

to sabotage perfection,
and I resent that.

You'll both feel better
after you've eaten.

I resent not being told when
Nicole's got a school meeting.

I resent the headmaster of the
school not knowing who I am.

And I resent you
bringing my daughter

up to this
child-proof sky-casket.

I don't want her
growing up here.

I don't want
to grow up here either.

I'll tell you
something else too.

Want to play uptown parent?
Play alone.

No!
Fine. I'll help you pack.

No.

My fathers
are getting a divorce.

Joey, what do you
want to do about Nicole?

We have to work out
some kind of joint custody.

I don't know.
What do you think is fair?

Maybe one week up here
with me in reality,

and then one week with you
down there in the circus.

Fine.
Done.

Hey, Marcy probably
left Nicole to both of us

because
she probably figured

that we'd give her
the best of both worlds.

Maybe this is
what she had in mind.

I doubt it.

Well, I'm gonna take a look in
on her before I head downtown.

[???]

Don't hate me.

Hey, what a great day, huh?

The best.
Yeah.

You and me, having
the time of our lives.

What'd you think of that
Great.

Yeah. And the zoo? Good zoo?
Great zoo.

And shopping all afternoon.

Yeah.

Yep. So.
How's Michael doing, eh?

Is he good?

He's great.

You have a lot
of fun together?

NICOLE:
Uh-huh.

Good. What do you do?

The zoo, the movies,
shopping all afternoon.

Why didn't you tell me?

Why didn't you tell me, huh?
We could've done something else.

You were having
such a good time.

I don't care where we go.
I just want to be together.

All right, okay, we won't go
to the zoo for a while.

Because I think the animals
are starting to recognize me.

[???]

What happened?
I just got your message.

I came here to pick her up and
she doesn't want to come home.

What?
Where is she?

She was in
the school library.

And she wouldn't come out
until you both arrived.

I was doing my homework.

Nicole, you do
your homework at home.

I don't have a home.

What about my place?

That's your place.
You have your place every day.

And Joey, you have
your place every day.

The only place
I have every day is here.

I live here now.

You want to see me,
you come here.

Both of you together.

Now I'm going to the cafeteria
to get my dinner.

Salisbury steak this month.

Well, gentlemen, I think you
have something to discuss.

I'll just go and help Nicole
find a good table.

Nicole's unhappy,
and it's all my fault.

Joe, do you know CPR?

What?

I don't think my heart
is b*ating anymore.

Did you see that little face?

That's not a happy face.

Hey, what did we do, huh?

I mean, how can she
be unhappy?

All we wanted was
for her to be happy.

No. All we wanted
was for us to be happy.

Which worked out for me

because when I'm alone
in my apartment now,

I tell you,
I'm thrilled to tears.

Nobody's around,
nobody's yelling,

nobody's moving anything.

I stand alone by my window,

I look at my great view
of that bridge, Joe,

and I want to go down there,
and jump off.

You know something?

It doesn't matter
where we live.

What's that?

Remember growing up
in the Bronx?

We're not moving back
to the Bronx.

When you were Nicole's age,

did you care what kind
of house you had?

Nah. I never thought about it.
Why not?

Because that's where
my parents lived.

Suddenly, I'm in the mood
for Salisbury steak.

Does this mean
we're dating again?

[???]

You happy?
Happy.

Thank you, Michael.

I know this isn't exactly
what you've always wanted.

Yes, it is. I've always
wanted to join the circus.

And now I have.

Besides, who wants to grow up
in a place that doesn't allow

two sweet kids
like you and Joey?

And I can still go
to Woodcrest School, can't I?

Because I really love
the blazer.

Hey, Joey got you in there.
Who am I to argue?

We could take the subway
together in the morning.

Yeah. You buy me a lunchbox,
drop me off at work.

Michael, I got
a little surprise for you.

I made you something.

[CHUCKLES]

There we go.

Welcome home.

I love it.

You made something that I love.

This scares me.

Pull the cord at night.

What? Whoa.

You know,
I'm thinking to myself,

years uptown.
I mean, what kind of adventure

is your whole life in
the same place?

Mind if I come in?

NICOLE: Hi, judge.
Hi, sweetie.

You got both of your
daddies back?

Uh-huh.
Good.

Because in my opinion,
joint custody is unnatural.

A child needs two fathers.

So this case comes
before me

where this construction company
is going under,

and they have several buildings
up for public auction.

And there's one downtown
that I like.

So I buy it.

Your Honor, isn't that
a conflict of interest?

Sue me.

Judge, how come
you didn't bring

a social worker
with you this time?

Because now
I'm going to be so close

that I decided
to look in on you myself.

How close exactly?

Your rent is due
on the first of the month.

[???]

[???]