07x06 - The Dukes in Hollywood

[bunniefuu]

- Yee-haw!
- Yee-haw!

Now, you're lookin'
at Boondocks Pike.

A picturesque but seldom
traveled Hazzard County road.

And it can sometimes be
awful hazardous for a traveler.

You see, like that old
log layin' in the road.

You never know what to expect.

Like things
fallin' out of trees.

And predatory wildlife.

'Cut! Cut! Cut!'

Nicely done, Brock. Print that.

Which just made
it a natural location

for a Hollywood movie
company to come and sh**t.

The Hazzard folks was curious
about the Hollywood wildlife.

It was a mutual curiosity.

Can you believe
this, Uncle Jesse?

I mean, a big movie
star like ol' Brock Curtis

right here in Hazzard.

It is somethin'. I wonder
where the kids are.

It's a shame they're
missin' all this.

'You knew they're foolin'.'

Bo, can't you go any faster?

Today's Brock Curtis' big
scene, and I don't wanna miss it.

Daisy, if you hadn't
spent so much time

getting yourself ready,
we'd have been there by now.

Yeah, I know, but..

Oh, fellas!

Don't you think Brock
Curtis is the cutest moviestar

you've ever seen?

- Don't make me gag.
- Oh, come on.

- He doesn't do nothing for me.
- Alright.

- I love him.
- We'll take a shortcut, okay?

- Okay.
- Alright.

Now, this next scene is rough.
You sure you can handle it?

It's why they pay
me the big bucks.

- Everything all set?
- I took care of it myself.

It'll look just like
an accident, Mr. D.

You sure you wanna
go through with this?

I've got to. I'm desperate.

I've a $ million insurance
policy on Brock Curtis.

That I've to collect
on to survive.

- I get the message.
- I've run out of money.

If I don't come up
with that million

I'll lose this picture my
house, my swimming pool

my limousine,
everything. And so will you.

Brock Curtis has to die.

Now, we've all heard
about how cutthroat

the movie business is

but I swear I thought
they was exaggeratin'.

Okay, Billy, let's get
cracking. Way behind schedule.

Okay, Jason.

Folks, quiet on the set.

We're ready to roll.

- Cameras ready?
- All set, Mr. Holloway.

The helicopter in position?

Check.

Alright, this is the
big chase scene.

We got lot of coverage,
so it's gotta be a good one.

- You ready, Brock?
- Let's make some movie magic.

Alright, quiet on the set,
folks and I mean quiet!

Roll cameras.

And action!

'Give him one in there.'

'He jumped clear
off of the hill there.'

That's it. Kick him
there. Ju... oh, yeah.

'Alright! Hey, could have
fooled me, I'll tell you that.'

'I ought to knock him to
the middle of next week.'

'No, you won't.'

Accelerator's stuck.
Brakes are gone.

Help! My brakes are gone!

Well, I don't know what
he's so excited about.

That's a normal
Hazzard County drive.

Let's go, Bo.

Alright, look out, everybody.

What should we do, Mr. Holloway?

Uh, uh, uh, call an ambulance.
And keep those cameras rolling.

Keep those cameras rolling,
Chuck. We want all of this.

Now, that old boy
is havin' a bad day.

Tell you what, he
looks like he's out cold.

Sure does. He's gonna be k*lled.

Not if we can help it.

- Luke, be careful.
- Of course, I'll be careful.

- Looks like he made it.
- Alright.

Now, if he can
just slow that down.

Brock's gonna be just fine.

Alright, hang on, this
might hurt a little bit.

- Yeah.
- Alright.

- That's what you'd have done.
- Stop that, would you please.

- I think he's alright.
- Be careful.

I couldn't believe the
way they jumped that car..

And so Bo and Luke got
to meet a big movie star

but if he'd have
been a country singer

they'd have really been excited.

As it was, Daisy made up for it.

Thank you.

'You Dukes are marvelous.'

That's exactly the kind of
excitement I need in my picture.

Thanks a lot, Billy. I'm
unconscious and things pick up.

Oh, no offense. It's my fault
and the script's. Not yours.

I still don't know
what happened.

The brakes just went out
and the accelerator was stuck.

Well, that's just it.

When we checked, the hydraulic
lines were completely gone.

The screws could've loosened
bouncin' down a road like that.

'It ain't likely.'

You think someone
could have loosened them?

Well, there's no
tellin' for sure.

Oh, come on now, Brock!

I'm sure it was an accident,
let's not get hysterical.

In any case, we got it on film.

You guys not only saved our star

you might have
saved the picture.

Well, sh**t, glad to do it.

It was one way of
gettin' to meet you.

'Mmm-hm-hmm.'

Let's face it,
Blake. You blew it.

Well, it would have
worked perfectly

if those rubes
hadn't interfered.

Don't worry, Mr. D, because
I'm gonna take care of Curtis

before we leave Hazzard.

Well, if those
rubes interfere again

take care of them too.

After the movie
company had finished

their last sh*t in Hazzard,
Boss gave 'em a farewell party

before they returned
to Hollywood.

Of course, ol' Boss
had an ulterior motive.

Mr. Dillard! Oh, you
came. I'm so glad.

- Welcome to my party.
- Welcome, welcome, welcome.

I'm J.D. Hogg.

- And I'm Rosco P...
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen,

I've a most fantastic
movie idea for you.

- Well, I'm looking for someon...
- Yeah, listen to this.

You know, I've led
a most exciting life.

Oh, yes. Full of action and
adventure a-and larcen...

- Would you please?
- Well, it's just that..

Now, Mr. Dillard. Mr. Dillard?

Where'd he go? Oh, dag
blast it! Look what you done.

- Well, I'm sorry.
- I gotta go work on the script.

And you look terrific. And I
wanna ask you something.

I want you to be in my picture.

- Do you mean that?
- We certainly do.

Billy and I'd like to put
you and the General

in the movie.

Well, that's real
flattering of y'all

but we ain't done no actin'.

Well, hold on a second now.
Daisy did some local theater.

Yes, but, Bo, I don't know.

We can't leave Uncle Jesse
tendin' to the farm by himself.

- Thanks a lot y'all, but...
- 'Won't take no for an answer.'

Billy got that chase scene
and wants to use it in the picture.

That's right. It was fantastic!

I'm gonna rewrite the entire
ending and put you in it.

'I want realism, I
want fresh faces.'

And I wanna make
a deal with you three

to come to Hollywood
for two weeks.

Us? In Hollywood?

- 'Well, what do you say?'
- Oh, I've always..

'Land sakes!'

Possum on a gum bush.

Daisy, I always knew you
oughta be in the movies.

Possum on a gum bush?

- I've to talk to Uncle Jesse.
- See if he can do without us.

If you like, I'll ride along,
maybe help convince him.

Would you? Well, let's go!

- Let's give it a try.
- Good luck, you guys.

- Thank you.
- Thank you very much.

Alright.

Come on, let's go.

- I'll put a stop to that.
- Don't, Mr. Dillard.

This could be the
chance I was waiting for.

Supposing someone
happens to drive that orange car

of theirs off the
road with Curtis in it?

Uh-oh, looks like
the Duke's luck

is holding true to form.

There's gonna be trouble.

And they're smack
dab in the middle of it.

It ain't easy gettin' my
whole life down on paper.

What was I doin'
during the Depression?

- Hey, Boss.
- Hmm?

- Guess what I just heard.
- What? I can't guess. Tell me.

Well, listen, those Hollywood
people are gonna take

the Dukes to Hollywood.

Oh, they're taking
the Dukes to..

They're taking the
Dukes to Hollywood?

Well, what about me?
Ain't they takin' me?

- Well, it don't look so.
- Dag blast it, it ain't fair.

Oh. Listen, little chrome
dome. Listen, don't be upset.

You know, there
ain't no justice.

I know it. Oh, wait a minute.
Oh-ho, you said the magic word.

- Chrome?
- No!

- Dome?
- No! No, no! Justice!

Justice! I'd have got it if
you'd given me half a chance.

Well, listen, them Dukes
are on probation, ain't they?

Oh, yeah.

If they wanna go to Hollywood

they gotta take their
probation officer with 'em.

- Namely me!
- And me. Oh, you, you rascal!

I knew that we'd get it.

Hollywood..

Here we come!

Alright, now, get away, get
away. I'm only up to .

I'm gonna go tell Flash.

It's better than doggy num nums.

Are you sure that
you and that director

ain't pulling our
legs, Mr. Curtis?

Hey, call me Brock. No way.

I'll see to it that Jason
Dillard, our producer

puts it in writing.

We sure could use the money
to fix up the farm for Uncle Jesse.

- So anyway, Mr...
- Ah!

I mean Brock.

- I sure loved your last movie.
- It was great.

- Yeah, we saw it...
- Bo. Bo, look out!

You know, I've heard it's
rough makin' it in Hollywood.

The Dukes are havin' a
rough time just gettin' there.

- Is everybody alright?
- What the heck was that about?

Did you see? That
guy had a mask on.

- Yeah.
- He almost got us k*lled.

- You sure handled that wheel.
- Thank you.

This puts your accident
in a different light.

Somebody's tryin'
to hurt you bad.

You've any idea who it could
be? Do you have any enemies?

Well, I didn't think so.

Of course, in this
business you can never tell.

Anyway, I'm certainly
glad you Dukes are coming

to Hollywood with me.
You're my good-luck charms

Unless maybe all this has
changed your mind about coming?

- Oh, no way.
- Don't worry about a thing.

- We're gonna be there with you.
- We'd love to be in your movie.

Hey, hang on. We gotta get
Uncle Jesse's permission still.

- Oh, yeah.
- Let's head home.

Wait a minute. We also gotta
check with Boss Hogg about it.

What's he got to
do with you leaving?

Well, a few years back,
me and Bo got busted

for moonshine,
we're on probation.

Uncle Jesse made a
deal with the government.

We'll tell you about
it, but don't you worry..

Meanwhile, the producer's flunky

had deep-sixed the car he swiped

and was reporting on
the failures of his mission.

Those yokels are ruining me.

Well, that's twice
they've saved Curtis' hide.

Look, we're leaving Hazzard,
so it looks like I'll have to wait

till we're back in LA
to collect that policy.

You're forgetting
one thing, Mr. D.

Thanks to that
genius director of ours

those Duke kids
are coming along.

Look, there's $
million at stake here.

If they get in your way
again out there, k*ll them.

You are gonna be marvelous.
It's gonna be a fabulous..

Naturally, Jesse gave his okay

for the boys to
leave for Hollywood.

And so did Boss.

On the condition that he
and Rosco could go along

as their probation officers.

The director agreed,
so everyone packed.

And at dawn, the movie company

was ready to
leave for the airport.

Tell me that ain't
who I think it is.

Dressed like that,
they could be arrested

for disturbin' the peace.

'They got their nerve forcin'
themselves along on this trip.'

Boss and Rosco will do about
anything to get in the movies.

Mr. Dillard! Oh, Mr. Dillard,
I'm here and I'm headed..

He just thought he
had trouble before.

I hope I get to sit next
to you on the plane.

Me too!

I've a brilliant idea to cast the
lead in The J.D. Hogg Story.

- A-are you ready?
- I'm ready!

Robert Redford.

'Oh, how about that, huh?'

And you know who should
play Rosco P. Coltrane?

No, who?

- Burt Reynolds.
- Burt Reynolds.

Let's load the bus.
We're due at the airport.

We're going! See
you on the plane!

Ciao! Nothing personal, Flash.

- Ciao?
- Who are they?

Get in the car. Let's go.

- We'll call when we get there.
- Right.

- Take it easy, Uncle Jesse.
- Be good.

- Okay.
- This would really be a kick.

If it wasn't for all them things
happenin' to Brock Curtis.

I know. He's a real
nice guy. I kinda like him.

Somebody's out to
get him, that's for sure.

Just gotta stay alert.

- Say, Rosco?
- What?

Did you put out an APB on
that guy who tried to clobber us?

Of course, I did.

Dipstick, here, will take
care of it, won't you?

Don't worry, Luke. If he's
in the county, I'll find him.

Come on, folks.
Let's get aboard now.

Rosco, did you have to
bring that fleabag with you?

Well, listen, she cries
if I leave her by herself.

Come on, honey..

Now, Hollywood has
withstood premieres

scandals and earthquakes

but it might be facing
its severest test.

Friends, this is
travelin' Hollywood style.

A charter flight with
everybody up top

and General Lee
in the cargo hold.

Now, ain't that a picture?

Sorta reminds you
of Roy and Trigger

going down Hollywood
Boulevard, don't it?

Listen, Bo, keep
your eye on the wheel.

You have to look out for
these California drivers.

Would you look out? Because
you're crushing my sequins.

Well, you ain't doing too
much for my doodads either.

Oh, hush up, will you? Or I'm
takin' you out of my life story.

'That's a promise.'

Look! There's
Hollywood Boulevard.

- 'I'll be.'
- 'It sure is.'

'Wow.'

Look up ahead, there's
the Chinese Theater

where they put their
footprints in cement.

- That's it, alright.
- Oh, I don't believe this.

- My, oh, my.
- Oh, this is just..

- Like I always pictured it.
- 'Me too.'

Dag blast it, Rosco! Will you
hush up that hound dog of yours?

Well, she thought
she saw Lassie.

- Lassie?
- Yes.

After a Hollywood tour
and a good night's sleep

at a fancy motel complete
with indoor plumbin'

The Dukes reported for work

with their probation
officers, Boss and Rosco.

Howdy. Uh, name's Bo Duke.

This here's my cousin
Daisy and my cousin, Luke.

We're here to help Brock
Curtis out with his picture.

Okay. Who's that in back?

Unfortunately, they're with us.

That's J.D. Hogg
and Rosco Coltrane.

That's Rosco P.
Coltrane, and this is Flash.

- Say hello.
- Oh, would you hush up?

The company's on
the New York street set.

Straight ahead, end
of the street, to the left.

- Thank you, sir.
- Thank you.

I don't see no naked women.

My goodness, can you
see any producers here?

No, but I see some
scanty-clad women.

'Ooh-hoo, look at that!'

- 'Ooh, lookit there.'
- 'Oh, lookit there.'

I'll bet he's a movie
star. Ask him, Bo.

Hey, are you, are you anybody?

- It's Zorro.
- Of course, he's somebody.

Oh, look at that dress.

It's hard to believe
they're just actors, ain't it?

Oh, look down this street.

'Zorro, zero..'

Alright, we'll start here.

We'll carry them, then
take them over there.

You got that, Jackie?
Betty, write that down.

Can you set that up now?

I keep telling you, Brock,
I'm positive those were just

a couple of unfortunate
accidents back there in Hazzard.

I would still like those two
extra guards around, Jason.

I am not so sure.

- You don't trust me.
- It's my neck.

'There they are.'

- Alright.
- Is Brock in there?

I'm sure he is.

'This is the best
I've ever seen.'

'Flash is excited.'

Hey, welcome to the salt mine.

- Hey.
- How are you doing?

- Hi, Brock.
- Daisy.

- Luke.
- Good to see ya.

What do you think? Look
just like New York City?

It's just amazing.

I think Bo's impressed.

Hey, Luke, you know somethin'?

These buildings ain't
got nothing behind 'em.

Well, that means
they're all fake.

Shh. Don't let that
get around, okay?

Now, those guards are
real, so everything's cool.

- That's good.
- How're you doing?

Alright, Billy,
let's get cracking.

It's after o'clock, we still
don't have our first sh*t.

Alright. You heard our
producer, let's get set up.

Why don't you come along?
Brock, bring them along.

Daisy, we'll go, find
the make-up trailer.

Jackie, how're you doing? We're
gonna make some movies, huh?

Looks like we're gonna do that.

Oh, Mr. Dillard, Mr. Dillard,
oh, I know you any place.

Oh, yeah. You
look just like you do.

You know me, don't you?
J.D. Hogg from Hazzard County.

And I'm Rosco P. Coltrane.

It's time to talk about our
deal for The J.D. Hogg Story.

Oh-h-h.

How about this for casting?
Listen to this great idea.

- For my wife, Lulu.
- Uh-huh.

- Bo Derek.
- Yes.

Oh, I love that idea,
J.H. That does it.

Yeah, if you can't
get Raquel Welch.

- Yeah, of course.
- Yeah, yeah.

- Did you..
- Keep them away from me.

Mr. Dillard, wait a minute.

Stop that. You want to back off.

If you don't stop
pestering Mr. Dillard

I'll have you
thrown off the lot.

What? Thrown off the lot? Do
you know who you're talking to?

'Besides that, we are
the probation officers'

for Bo and Luke Duke.

That's right. And
if we go, they go.

- Yeah.
- Get off the lot.

Wait a minute. I ain't
leaving until I sell my picture.

I'll knock him.

If Dillard doesn't recognize
a great thing when he sees it

I'm gonna find a
producer who does.

- Come on.
- That's tellin' 'em.

This is the scene
where you help Brock

get the secret
micro film to the UN.

I want you Dukes to make
a really exciting entrance

in your car right
down the street.

You think you can come up
with something spine tingling?

Yeah, it's just like an average
day in Hazzard County, huh?

- Bo!
- We'll think of somethin'.

Good, show it to me.

- Alright.
- Okay.

Maybe, we can slide
it around the turn?

Okay, everybody, let's get this
equipment moved out of here.

I just can't believe
we're in the movies.

It's so exciting.

Yeah. It's good that nobody's
bothering Brock no more too.

- Yeah.
- Hey, listen, Daisy.

To be on the safe side,
while we're comin' up

with something for the
General, keep an eye on Brock.

- That'll be no problem at all.
- I bet it won't.

- I'll see you later.
- Alright.

I'm telling you, Blake

I need that $ million
insurance in a hurry or..

I'm wiped out.

Don't worry, Mr. Dillard.

While the Dukes are
getting all the attention

Brock Curtis is going to
finally have his accident.

I guarantee you that.

Do you have any idea
what you're gonna do..

And while Bo and
Luke was rehearsing

with the director,
the producer's flunky

was rehearsing a
little scene of his own.

Dukes, this is a rehearsal,
whenever you're ready.

Uh, that's a big - ,
we're all set. Comin' ahead.

Oh, my goodness.

- Thanks.
- 'Everything I wanted.'

'That was just ..'

Friends, in Hazzard or Hollywood

if there's trouble,
it'll find the Dukes.

You alright? You okay, Brock?

'I don't believe it,
another accident.'

I looked up, there was a
light fallin' out of that window.

Alright.

Daisy and Brock
could've got hurt bad

from all the way up here.

Here's where the
light was attached.

Looks like a bolt could
have just come loose.

Watch yourself, wouldn't wanna
hurt one of them pretty legs.

Thanks, about
being careful, I mean.

Well, take a look at this.

Have you noticed anybody
wandering around the set

wearing brown
corduroy pants today?

I didn't notice, but
I can check it out.

No. You better let me handle it.

Hey, come on, let's
go. Watch your step.

Are you alright, Brock?

Yeah, the Dukes came
to the rescue again.

They're more reliable
than the U.S. cavalry.

I guess, we all owe you a
debt of thanks, young man.

Don't mention it.

Jason, there have been
entirely too many accidents.

I think it's time we call
in the outside police.

- Yeah.
- I think that's a good idea.

No. It will be terrible
publicity for the picture.

That was an accident.
Pure and simple.

Alright. I'll call in the
studio security to investigate.

Now, if you're
really alright, Brock..

And you, miss, too,
let's all get back to work.

Alright, everybody, let's take
a break. We'll clean up the set.

Jackie!

- Clean that up, okay?
- Are you alright?

Brock, let's get you first
aid. Clean that up now.

Alright, everybody,
let's clear up the set.

What did you find?

Well, it's just like
back in Hazzard.

The bolts that were holding
that light down for years

just kinda worked
themselves free.

- Or somebody freed them.
- Yeah, exactly.

That ain't all.
Here, take a look.

This was on a nail
next to the window.

We find the person this
belongs to, we got the culprit.

Great. Well, we're on a
break, let's go look around.

I feel a little strange
about that, Daisy

seeing as how
this ain't Hazzard.

What if we take this to head
of security, see what he says?

Listen, while
ya'll are doing that

I'm gonna kinda snoop around
and see if there's anybody

hangin' around that's got
a grudge against Brock.

I bet that pretty little
assistant director can help us.

- Excuse me.
- Bo, be careful.

- Yeah.
- Come on.

Meanwhile, Boss and
Rosco was making the rounds

of all the producers' offices
to peddle The J.D. Hogg Story

and there wasn't a
whole lot of excitement.

He slammed that door, he's
gonna wake up velvet ears.

Come on, he ain't the
only producer around here.

- Hold it right there.
- What?

We've been getting
complaints about you two.

- What?
- You have to leave the lot.

Come with me.

We're here on official business.

- Right, so am I.
- Wait a minute..

I ain't leaving this here
lot until I sell my picture.

- Come on with me.
- No, no, we..

Hey!

Oh-h-h!

- Hey!
- Wait a minute, wait a minute.

There. Come on.

Come back here!
Come, come back here.

Uh-oh, looks like Blake is
one jump ahead of the Dukes.

He's gotten rid of
them ripped pants.

- Where's it?
- Come on, quick.

- Come on, come on.
- Wait a minute.

While Boss and Rosco
was gettin' a runnin' tour

of the movie studio,
Luke and Daisy was talkin'

to the chief of security and
not makin' much head way.

Thanks for your concern
folks, but it's our job

to handle matters like this.
Trust me, we're handling it.

Oh, I'm sure you are, we just
thought maybe we could help.

Like we was wondering
if you knew somebody

who might have a grudge
against Brock Curtis?

Or wanted to do him any harm?

Randall.

They are?

Well, get more help if you
need it, but I want them off the lot.

You people are certainly
making pests out of yourselves.

'Your two oddball friends are
disturbing the entire studio.'

Now, you'll have to excuse me.

You might like to see
this, our cousin found...

I said, you'll have
to excuse me.

Yes, sir.

Much obliged.

Ain't he adorable.

Well, since we're already
pests why don't we go all the way

and find Mr. Torn Pants.

'Alright.'

Alright, alright, the
coast is clear, come on.

Come on.

Well, this is...
oh, I can't see..

Oh.

- Come on, will you?
- Well..

- How do I look?
- You gave me a start there.

- I did, huh?
- You're kinda cute, you know.

I believe I need a shave.

Would you hush up the dog?
It'll give us away or somethin'.

Flash doesn't recognize
me, she thinks I'm a gorilla.

You know, I have a
great craving for a banana.

Uh-oh, here comes the guard.

Wait a minute.

It's you two.

So how do you like the
movie business so far?

There are some
things I like just fine.

And, uh, I gotta
tell you the truth

there's other things I'm
not so darn sure about.

Like lights fallin'
on top of people.

Would you tell me a little bit
more about this producer fella

and that shadow of his?

First of all, nobody
likes Blake, he's a creep.

'But, uh, Jason Dillard's
okay as far as producers go.'

At least he was until he started
getting into financial trouble.

Financial trouble, huh?

I heard it from the hair
dresser whose girlfriend

goes with Dillard's driver

and she said that Dillard was
really having some problems.

Huh.

Alright, you two
clowns, out of there.

Wait a minute. Don't do that.
Don't do that. Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.
This is an outrage.

I and this gentleman are public
officials of Hazzard County.

Can't you see us?

That's right, I'm
Rosco P. Coltrane

and this is just a disguise.

Oh, yeah. We got disguises
on. I'm not a frog you know.

- And this is a Sheriff here.
- I don't care. Let's go.

- Wait a minute.
- Don't scuff my fur.

Listen, you're making me angry.

And while all this was going on

Jason Dillard was getting
a very important phone call.

Gordon, I've been doing business
with your bank for years.

How can you put the
squeeze on me like this?

Oh, thanks a lot.
Twenty-four hours, huh?

That's a big favor.

They're cutting off
my credit in hours.

Mr. Dillard, I
swear you'll collect

your millon bucks insurance.

Brock Curtis won't
last out the day.

Yeah, I've heard that before.

It's those blasted Dukes
that have been saving him.

Now, they make sure
that nothing goes wrong

I'm gonna take
care of those hicks.

And then, I'm gonna
take care of Brock Curtis.

This is your last chance, Blake.

Or I'm bringing in
someone from the outside.

I'm not going down.

Meanwhile, Bo, Luke and Daisy

was meeting to compare notes
on what they had found out.

What did you find out?

Well, what people
are saying around here

is that this Jason Dillard fella

might have himself some
sort of financial problems

and lose the whole picture.

- That could make him desperate.
- Yeah.

Supposing Dillard and his
friend are behind these accidents

what good is it gonna do 'em?

Dukes, on the set,
please. Rehearsal.

Yeah, we're comin'.

We gotta talk this over some
more and get deeper into it.

Let's keep a close
eye on him, okay?

I demand to see the
head of the studio.

- I got a movie idea to sell.
- Big, big movie.

You aren't seeing anyone.
You're barred from the lot.

What?

Look, when The J.D.
Hogg Story hits the screen

and takes in, oh, I don't know,
a million smackers anyhow

'and I own, this here studio..'

- Owns it.
- You know what?

- I'll have you fired.
- He will fire you.

I'll take that chance,
now move out.

George.

Oh, sorry about
that, Mr. Baldwin.

Just two more weirdos
trying to make it into movies.

- Who's he calling a weirdo?
- That's alright, George.

Excuse me, I'm G.S.
Baldwin, the producer.

- G.S. Baldwin.
- Baldwin.

- Oh, producer.
- You're a producer.

O-o-h! Uh, mister..

I've got something,
you'll be interested in.

You certainly have,
uh, do you mind?

Oh, well, uh, no.

Let's have a look at you, girl.

What a face, look at
those eyes, George.

Look here, mister, uh,
hey, listen, I wanna tell you

about a wonderful
movie idea I've got...

'Excuse me, gentlemen.'

Do you mind if I take
Flash along with me?

I'd like to give
her a screen test.

A screen test?

She could be our
next big animal star.

Just look at those
eyes, George, huh?

Get their names and addresses.
I'll be in touch with you.

- Yes, sir.
- Wait a minute.

You wouldn't wanna keep Flash
from being a star, would you?

Oh, no.

'Gonna be a star.'

- I'll be in touch.
- Oh, do that. A star.

- I can't believe it.
- 'I can't either.'

You know, you weren't
discovered, but Flash was!

Lemme tell you
about the next stunt.

After you get the microfilm
from Brock, you take off

and then a truck will
come and block your way

so you hit the ramp, fly over
and head out down that street.

- We come from that direction?
- Yeah, down there.

You guys get to use
ramps in Hollywood, huh?

- Kinda takes the fun out of it.
- Yeah.

Alright, let's, let's,
uh, try a rehearsal.

You got it.

At least Brock's where
we can keep an eye on him.

Daisy's doing a
good job at that.

- Yeah, I think so.
- Keep your eye on that ramp.

Dukes, this is a rehearsal,
whenever you're ready.

'Action.'

'Bo?'

- The engine's dead.
- We don't have time to stop.

That producer's gonna
have to do better than that.

He's messing with the
Dukes and General Lee.

Wha-what's, cut it, cut it.

We got some more
of them barrels.

- Wow.
- Fuel wire's split wide open.

Sure is.

Split wide open? Looks like
it's been cut clean through.

Well, let's not get
excited here, young man.

Your cousin said that line
was split and it very well

could have just from normal
wear and tear now, couldn't it?

I guess so, but...

You seem to think all these
unfortunate accidents are caused

by some mysterious person.
Do you have anyone in mind?

Yeah, we got a couple of ideas.

Well, let's hear 'em.

We don't wanna
talk about it just yet.

Well, until you are, is
this something you can fix?

We'll take care
of this right away.

Then, let's get on with it, huh?

If you don't think
this was an accident

we better do something.

Who do you suspect?

I don't wanna accuse somebody
until we got some evidence.

'Mr. Curtis, we
need you on the set.'

You know, you Dukes
are really something.

Take care of yourselves.

- You too.
- Yeah.

This is your chance. While the
Dukes are busy, go get Curtis.

And no excuses. I'll
take care of the guards.

Well, that's just great.

- What are we gonna do now?
- Gotta think of something fast.

Dillard's on set, I'll go to
his trailer, see what I can find.

I better go with you.

Alright. Bo, you can handle
that fuel line by yourself?

Yeah, shouldn't take
more than minutes.

- See you in a little bit.
- Great.

I'll save a little bit for
Flash. She loves hotdogs.

Wait a minute here.
Lift this car stopper here.

'Yeah, let us in, you hear?'

Yeah, we're here to see
Flash, the super starlet.

We're her managers.
Come on, open up.

My orders are to keep you
out of here. Now, go away.

- No! W-well, you can't do that.
- No.

Don't answer the
phone, talk to us!

Hey, wait.

'Hey, stop, come back here.'

You know, they'd
go a whole lot faster

if they'd just get
off and start runnin'.

But old habits is hard to break.

And if you're from Hazzard,
a chase means wheels.

Even if it is a kiddie car.

After us, so hurry,
hurry. Come on.

Come on, come on, come on.

"The National Accident
Insurance Company."

- Hey, did you find anything?
- Yeah, maybe. Come on.

- We gotta make a phone call.
- Alright.

'Alright. That way, that
way! That's the idea.'

'Come on, come on,
come on, come on.'

Come on, come on, come on.

Oh, watch it!

'Watch it!'

I didn't have the clamp
tight enough. It's alright now.

Find out anything?

Yeah, Daisy's on the phone
doin' a little shuck and jive.

She's calling the National
Accident Insurance Company.

Accident Insurance
Company? Yeah, good idea.

Hello.

This is Mr. Jason
Dillard's secretary callin'.

And I'm callin' about
the insurance policy

that Mr. Dillard has
for our movie cast.

Uh-huh, that's right.

Do you have a Mr. Brock
Curtis on that list?

Yes, I'll wait.

Yes? You have?

For $ million dollars.

'Yes, well that checks
with our list too.'

Much obliged. Bye.

Five million dollars.

That's what Dillard gets
if Brock has an accident.

Fellas, I think we
just found our motive.

Better tell Brock about it.

He's worth more to
them in a hospital bed

than in front of the cameras.

I wondered what
happened to them.

Come on, let's
go back to the set.

- Oh, my goodness.
- Alright.

'Wait a minute. Wait a minute.'

- Now, come on will you.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

'Wait a minute. Wait a minute.'

Those trouble makers are
on the back lot heading south.

We're following up.

'..I beg of you,
move it, move it.'

One thing Boss and
Roscoe accomplished

was to take
everybody's attention

off the bad dude, Blake.

Just as he was gettin'
ready for more dirty work.

'Hey, Luke, trouble.'

There he goes.

- Are you okay?
- Are you alright, Brock?

- Yeah.
- You break anything?

No.

Look out.

Hey, where are the guys?

- Look at that, it's Blake.
- Blake?

Careful.

Hey, wait..

I thought y'all might
need The General.

Get after him.

Watch it, watch it, watch
it. Go in there! Go in there!

- Oh!
- Oh.

- Where am I?
- Oh, oh.

- Yeah.
- We're dead.

- Yeah, we went to heaven.
- Oh, at least.

I thought I was going
to the other place.

I ain't going if
this ain't heaven.

Ooh!

'Looks like I'm never
gonna sell that picture now.'

Oh, hey! Watch it.

- What the heck.
- This is a minefield.

Stuff is fake in Hollywood.

Follow him through there.

And so that's how the Dukes
foiled a real Hollywood m*rder

and solved the mystery

of who was tryin'
to k*ll the movie star.

Jason Dillard, the
producer, and his flunky

was taken away and
locked up in a real prison.

And before long, the Hazzard
folks was headed back home.

And got picked up at the
airport by Enos and Jesse.

Bo, Luke and Daisy enjoyed
their fling at movie making.

But was glad to be back.

Home sweet home, huh?

Once again Hollywood
missed a golden opportunity.

Boss never sold his life story.

Or became th century Hogg.

And poor Flash
flunked her screen test.

She fell asleep in
front of the cameras.

Hollywood managed
to survive the Dukes.

But can you imagine
what would happen

if the Dukes took on Nashville?