03x20 - Knights of the Road

[bunniefuu]

In 1972,
a cr*ck commando unit...

was sent to prison
by a m*llitary court...

for a crime they didn't commit.

These men promptly escaped...

from a maximum-security
stockade...

to the Los Angeles underground.

Today, still wanted
by the government...

they survive
as soldiers of fortune.

If you have a problem,
if no one else can help...

and if you can find them...

maybe you can hire the A-Team.

Corson Truck Dispatch.

I just finished with lunch.
I'm on Main and Third.

Let me know
if you have any customers.

Clear.

This is Tyler.

If you see any of Corson's trucks
on the street, take care of them.

Corson One.

Bill from the diner called. There's a
silver-blue Volvo left in the loading zone.

It's been there awhile
and he wants it towed.

This is Tyler.

I just intercepted a Corson call.
Get over to Bill's Diner...

and get a silver-blue Volvo parked in
the front before Corson gets there.

Okay, I've got it over here,
Dad. You need a hand?

No, I've just about got it,
honey. There you go.

You know, it's hard to believe somebody
would leave a beautiful car like this...

abandoned at
the side of the road.

Oh, no. Look out, honey!

We'll take it from here,
Corson. This is our call.

No, Carl,
we got this call first.

If you want to check the log
books, you go right ahead.

I don't think so.

Dad! Put me down!

Dad.

Listen, old man...

Mr. Tyler made you
a very generous offer...

for your broken down junkyard.

There's no more business for you
in this town, Corson. Got it?

Dad!

You should feel thankful
your business is all we take.

You got so much more to give.

One pretty lady, huh, Carl?

How about it, Jenny? You want
to play house to save Poppa?

Hey, hey!

Get away from me.
Let me go.

Now, didn't your daddy ever teach
you it's not nice to hit people?

It makes them mad.
And when they get mad...

they do things.

Sometimes unpleasant things.

You understand
what I'm telling you?

I'm gonna get
those punks if it kills me.

Dad, we can't fight them alone
anymore. We need some help.

If only I could have found
The A-Team when it was in L.A.

Dad, there's a black van
over there.

I bet it's Tyler's.

I've taken about all
from Tyler, I'm gonna take.

Hello, I'm Hannibal Smith.
This is the A-Team.

They're scum, Mr. Smith.

They disable
people's vehicles and...

they charge them outrageous
prices to repair 'em.

Sometimes they just tow cars away for the
fee and claim some violation of the law.

Yeah, we've held them off
for quite a while...

but now they're starting
to play real hardball.

Yeah, I was the one who sent Dad to L.A.
to find the A-Team.

Never thought we'd be able
to do it, though.

If we'd have known he had such a beautiful
daughter, we'd have come to you.

About the payment.

Yes. Usually we require
a small deposit. And the...

balance is paid
upon completion of the job.

I'll be most happy to work out
all the details in private.

We have a part time
bookkeeper, Mrs. Kenper.

She'll be happy to go over
all that with you. Thank you.

- Faceman bites the dust.
- Right.

Your business
isn't that big, Mr. Corson.

Why would Tyler want
to go through all this...

just to get his hands on it?
- That's what doesn't make any sense.

I've got a franchise to go
across the border to pick up...

American cars stalled in Mexico.

And that, plus what we can pick up here in
town is barely enough to keep us afloat.

We can't even afford
part-time employees.

Colonel? Colonel, did I ever
tell you that...

being a tow truck driver has always
been a secret dream of mine?

Well, first thing we got to let Mr. Tyler
know is that you're still in business.

You know, Hannibal,
it just ain't fair.

These are honest people who
work hard all their lives...

trying to earn a honest living.

Then, some buzzard come along
and try to take it away.

Yeah, well, we'll just have to
bend their beaks, won't we?

- Faceman! Look at all this neat junk.
- Yeah.

Think of the history
that is extant in this yard.

Take this, for instance.

Huh?

That's nothing
but an old gearshift knob.

No. This is not just an old
gearshift knob. Listen.

Coming from a Japanese car.
As a matter of fact...

coming from a 1972
baby-blue Hiroshimoshi.

Murdock--

Think of the stories that this
knob could tell, if it could talk.

Think of the hearts and the minds and the
souls of the men who have touched it.

We're talking about
people's lives here.

Faceman,
this is not just a yard...

filled with junk cars strewn about
so that nature can consume them. No!

We're talking
about living creatures.

We're talking about souls.

Gee, I never thought of it
like that, Murdock.

You haven't read
much Bradbury, have you?

- Well, looks pretty nice.
- B.A. is the best.

Here you go, B.A.

Not bad?

Not bad.

Faceman, could I talk to you
for a minute, please?

Sure.

Excuse me.

Yes?

I'm beginning to become concerned
about what's going on here.

What?

That temptress dropped you
like a cold shower.

That wench tossed your charm aside
like a hot sweater in July, pal.

Really? What are you talking
about, Murdock? This is a case.

I mean, this is strictly
business with me.

You don't want to talk
about it? I understand.

I'll ride with you and if you
want to open up, I'll be there.

I'm going to leave now. You
stay here and think about it.

Murdock.

You know, Tyler monitors
our frequencies.

I'm counting on it.

We are like priests.

We're saving souls
on the road of life.

Highway rangers. No.

No, we're not rangers.

We're knights.

Knights of the Road!

When you're stranded
on the road, who do you call?

Yes, the tow truck driver.

That's you and me, B.A.

And the souls. They linger...

in each and every car.

Let's go, guys!

Habla, Senor Zuniga.

I'll have Corson's franchise
within a week.

Very good.

I assume the old man isn't giving
you too much trouble, then?

You've got to be kidding.

Hey, I can take care
of everything just fine.

Don't forget,
this is a 50-50 deal, huh?

Mr. Tyler.

The only reason I deal with
lowlives like yourself...

is to keep my hands
from getting dirty.

Don't overestimate
your position.

Go on, Faceman. Put your hand
in mine and say it.

The Tow Truck Driver's Creed must be
said at the beginning of each trip.

I swear to come to the aid
of the automotive maiden...

threatened by the ravages
of the asphalt dragon...

who breathes fire and
casts potholes in her path.

Who never uttered the cynical cliche,
"It's either not getting sparked,

or not getting gassed"?

And at the end of the day...

when twilight comes, when others
feel that duty has been served...

I shall not rest until my tools
and fingernails are clean.

For that is the creed
of a Knight of the Road.

Murdock, just be quiet. I want
to be alone with my thoughts.

Corson Base to units.
Here we go.

Hello, beautiful, what's up?

Pick up a gold Renault on Fourth and Main.
The driver has left the car.

- It has a broken drive shaft.
- Got it.

Face, we'll meet you there.

10-4, I'll see you there,
Colonel.

I'm gonna enjoy this.

This is Tyler.

I just spotted
a call from Corson.

There's a gold Renault broken
down on Fourth and Main.

I want to get there first
and teach him a lesson.

The Knights of the Road have
arrived at their destination, sir.

We're right behind you.
E.T.A. three minutes.

Roger.

Quickly, Faceman. We must get this
fair damsel in distress to a mechanic.

Well, heads up, Murdock.
It's showtime.

You just don't learn, huh?

Maybe this time
we'll break his legs.

Well, well.

Looks like Corson
got himself a little helper.

All the better
to send our message.

Well, thanks, gentlemen, but we
have everything under control.

I don't think we'll be needing
your assistance after all.

You sure are a funny guy
for a pretty boy.

So I'll tell you what.

You get this truck out of here and I
promise I won't break your face too badly.

Be gone. The Knights
of the Road are not afraid.

Be gone before I raise my lance and
make of thee a poor and piteous fool...

whose tail will ride twixt tooth and
tongue and buried there until you die!

What are you talking about,
punk?

I give you both fair warning.

I will count to 175.

- One, two--
- Why, you...

Nice.

All right.

I know just the place
to put these slimeballs.

Let's go.

Hey!

Hey!

Well, I think that ought
to get Tyler's attention.

What the heck's
going on here, huh?

This is great.

I've got a bunch of damn
Girl Scouts working for me.

These guys came at us
from both directions.

Now I'm telling you, they were
planning for this as*ault.

What do you think I pay you for?
To take care of any problems.

I can tell you one thing, Mr. Tyler.
It ain't gonna happen again. Right?

- Right.
- You got that right, Bubba.

Now, I want you guys
to arm yourselves.

Keep it in the truck if you have
to, double-up if you have to.

Anybody gets near one of our
trucks, you waste them.

- And bring the body to me, you understand?
- Right.

We got a week to get
Corson's franchise...

or Zuniga's gonna cut out on us.

Now get moving!

Come on, guys, let's go to work.

I'll personally give $50...

to whoever spots
one of these guys.

Now what I mean,
the work order...

was sent out yesterday.
I mean...

we drove clear across town
in order to get here.

I don't get it.

Nothing was written down
by the girl there.

Oh, boy.
Gee whiz, I...

I hate temp help these days. I mean,
you tell them to write it, you know?

You tell them to carbon it, even make
a xerox of it, but do they listen?

No, siree.
Well, I tell you.

I personally apologize and it
will not happen again, okay?

As soon as my boys run a check on these
radios here, we'll be out of here. Okay?

- Yeah, okay.
- Okay, great.

You got the clips on tight,
crazy man?

I am shocked.

I am shocked that you would, for even a
moment, consider casting any doubts...

on the ability
of a Knight of the Road.

I'm gonna cast my fists on your lips
if you don't answer the question.

They are tight, sir.

I wrapped the monster jaws...

around the unsuspecting wire,
and I pressed...

and I pressed until they became
one with each other. In fact...

it was such a beautiful moment,
I may need a cigarette.

Okay, Hannibal.
We got the radios wired up.

♪ See you later, alligator ♪

♪ Don't overheat your radiator ♪

♪ Just keep it cool,
we'll catch you later ♪

♪ You know you finally
met your match ♪

♪ We'll throw a chain around
that bumper ♪

♪ And tow away
that sporty number ♪

♪ Let 'em worry,
let 'em wonder ♪

♪ We gotta keep 'em
on their toes ♪

♪ That's the way
the story goes ♪

♪ You can dish it out ♪

♪ But can you take it? ♪

♪ You're acting tough ♪

♪ Bet you're only faking ♪

♪ Ain't you had enough,
ain't your knees a-shakin'? ♪

♪ 'Cause we're
the baddest boys in town ♪

Hey, you guys need a tow truck?

♪ See you later, alligator ♪

♪ Don't overheat your radiator ♪

♪ Just keep it cool,
we'll catch you later ♪

♪ You boys have finally
met your match ♪

♪ Sure did! ♪

♪ See you later, alligator ♪

♪ Don't overheat your radiator ♪

♪ Just keep it cool,
we'll catch you later ♪

♪ You guys have finally
met your match ♪

♪ Listen! ♪

♪ See you later, alligator ♪

♪ Yeah! ♪

This is incredible!

In the last two days, our business
has tripled anything we had before.

It's just a matter of going
out and finding the business.

I'd say, it was more
a matter of hiring you four.

That, too.

Yeah. Regardless of the danger,
that's what I'm here for.

To serve.

That's why we pay you.

Yeah. But I don't always do this
kind of stuff for the money.

I mean, sure. Running the risk of having
your skull beaten in with a crowbar...

that's fun in itself.
But, well...

helping people.
You know, that's...

that's also a thing with me.

That's very nice.

What are you staring at?

You. I've been watching you,
and I'm worried about you.

- Can I talk to you for a minute?
- You're thinking...

that I've been sh*t down, right?
- It is a little disturbing...

to the frontline troops to see their top
love-pilot hit the dirt and then cry "medic."

Do I have to go in there
just to prove to you...

that if she thought
I was interested in her...

I mean, she'd go for me in a hot second?
- Yes.

I want you to go in there
right now.

I want you to go in there
and talk to her...

and not come out
until you've fixed that flat.

- Right now?
- I'll wait right here.

- Fix that flat.
- Yeah.

Here. Let me
get that for you.

I can get it fine.

Wait a minute, Jenny. I think
we should have a little talk.

Now, I've tried to be nice...

charming, witty.

I think I deserve better,
don't you?

I mean, after all, I am one of the guys who's
trying to pull your garage out of the dumps.

And I do appreciate what you're doing.
What seems to be the problem here?

What's the problem? I'll tell
you what the problem is.

You are nice
and charming and witty.

You're even good looking. I know the type.
I was engaged to one.

I see. Well, I'm sorry.

- If I'd have known that--
- Face.

- Face, the Colonel wants you on the double.
- Right.

It's a blue Chevy
with no engine in it.

Parked two miles south of the
main highway on Wilson Road.

Put the package in the trunk...

You know, I've been
waiting for this.

I knew, there was something
hidden deeper.

Everything depends on it.

If Corson's guys get this one
away from us, it's over.

If anyone shows up,
I want this pickup cancelled.

What do you suppose
they're picking up, Colonel?

I don't know.
But whatever it is...

it's at the bottom
of Tyler's operation.

- So, what's the plan, Hannibal?
- The plan.

Face.

Oh, here.

This is the part I like.
I mean...

you can almost hear
those wheels turning.

Yeah, he's an idea machine all right.
He's on the jazz now.

We're gonna put our own package in
the blue Chevy out on Wilson Road.

Murdock.

So far, so good.

If they don't spot us
they'll go through with it.

Yeah, so far, so good.
But you forgot about Murdock.

Don't worry, B.A. The Knight
of the Road will be fine.

Okay, Murdock.

They're on you now.

Be quiet.

You're okay. You're clear.
They're hooking you up.

They just put something
in the trunk.

Murdock, they're doing something behind
the car. Can you tell what it is?

It looks like they're
changing the license plates.

We've gotta hang back.
Stay out of sight.

Take care of yourself.
It's all up to you now.

This is no problem
for a Knight of the Road.

This car belongs
to the Mexican Consulate.

It's free to pass into Mexico.

Corson is supposed to do
these border crossings.

It's a diplomat's car.

It doesn't come
under Corson's contract.

Diplomatic Immunity.
There is no search.

- They're crossing into Mexico.
- What're we gonna do now, Hannibal?

We can't cross the border
station without getting busted.

We're wanted men, remember?

We can get across the border,
but not in time to follow them.

Murdock?
This is Hannibal. Come in.

Murdock? Do you read?

That fool is on his own now.

We gotta get back
to Corson's garage.

The only chance of hooking up
with Murdock is if he phones us.

Yeah.

Where?
The trunk.

Toto, I have a feeling
we're not in Kansas anymore.

It looks like a 30,
no, a beautiful...

35-foot run.
What do you think, Howard?

The preferred aptitude
of this athlete...

will enable him
to perambulate...

this pedestrian abyss with
consummate facileness.

Maybe this Cinderella story
is too much to believe.

We don't like
any sudden surprises.

- We agreed on a price.
- Well, yes.

But you must
remember, my friend...

the price is always contingent
on the risks involved.

$300,000, we agreed on.
You can count it.

I will.

What about today's delivery?

You should have no trouble
crossing the border.

You will be towing my own personal car.
There should be no problems.

Of course, once you get the Corson
towing franchise, we won't...

have to worry about
what car we use, will we?

That's great.
Where's the dr*gs?

In the spare tire.

If you leave now, you should be
back in the United States by dawn.

- Hello?
- Hola.

Person-to-person call for
Mr. Hannibal Smith from Rod Knight.

No operator, no. Road.

- Road, as in Colossus of--
- That's me, operator. Go ahead.

- Hey, Hannibal.
- Murdock, where are you?

I haven't got a clue, Hannibal,

I was under the hood of the car.

I'd ask somebody around here, but
they don't seem to speak my language.

I think, I'm either in Mexico...

or at a swap meet.

Can you give us
a destination or a location?

No, that's a negative.
I had to lay low, but...

I'm in a...

I'm in a villa somewhere. But here's
what I do know. Do you have a pencil?

This is the scoop.

There's some big sh*t down here by
the name of Zuniga who is selling...

dr*gs by running them across the
border in wrecks that they fix up.

Now, Tyler has just
bought the next load.

Well, that's why they want
Corson's franchise.

So no one will question why they're
towing wrecks across the border.

They needed to make
a dope run now...

so they used diplomatic plates.

But they can't overuse it 'cause
the border guards get suspicious.

It looks like our muchachos are getting
ready to move their next load...

in a black, four-door sedan.
- Okay.

See if you can find out
more about this Zuniga.

And, get us a location
so we can meet you there.

I gotta mail something first.
Trust me.

Tyler's bringing in a load
of dr*gs. We got work to do.

They're crossing the border now.

They're towing a black sedan
with diplomatic plates.

Pick them up about a mile down the
road and get them between us, B.A.

Yeah, get them between us.

Those Corson guys are on us
again. They're everywhere.

All right, joyride's over.
Everybody out.

Hey, what's going on, huh?

Diplomatic plates.

That's why the guards never
searched this car.

- Hey, look, Face. Powdered sugar.
- Not my brand.

Now, there's just one thing
I'd like to know.

Where does Zuniga live?

I ain't telling you spit, jack.

Doesn't look like he wants
to cooperate, Hannibal.

No, it doesn't, does it?

But I bet he changes his mind.

Not a chance.

What're you doing?

It's really a shame you're not
more cooperative.

You're bluffing.
I ain't telling you nothing.

You want to know something,
use the Yellow Pages.

Yellow Pages? Cute. B.A.

- What the hell you doing, huh?
- Hey!

It's simple. I'm gonna squeeze
the truth out of you.

You're crazy!

Wrong answer.

- This is m*rder!
- Now wait a minute!

Stop!

This is m*rder.

This is pest control.

B.A., you're developing
a sense of humor.

I'll tell you what you want to know.
He lives in a mansion in Mexico.

West of Santa Rosalina. A couple
of miles across the border.

125 San Marcos Road.
Now call him off!

Yeah, I knew you'd listen to reason.
You guys can get out now.

- What?
- Yeah, you can get out. Come on.

Face, let's tie them up.
We've got work to do.

No, I need something bigger,
more powerful.

That truck over there,
it hasn't run for awhile...

but it weighs about 12 tons.

Can you get her going?

You know, Hannibal, if it
got wheels, I can fix it.

There's more than one way
to get south of the border.

Drop the g*ns.

What is the meaning of this? Who
are you to come in here like this?

Well, let's say that
we're the cleaning crew.

We've come to sweep up the dirt
starting with you. Move it.

If you're looking for money,
I can pay you.

Well, if you're
looking for money...

it's been mailed.

To the Corson garage.

And you know how the mails are.

Through rain, through sleet,
through hail...

they must go through.

Okay, B.A.

- We thought we'd bring your car back.
- Yeah.

Algae is so terrible
on the paint job.

You'll pay for this. You will
never leave Mexico alive.

Really?

Let's put this slimeball
in the local slammer.

Hannibal, we are bringing
these guys to the police.

Man, we're gonna be
asking for trouble.

Don't worry, B.A. The cops
don't want us in Mexico.

And this time, we don't have to leave the
garbage in a pile before the police arrive.

This is gonna be fun.

I want these men arrested
as cocaine dealers.

Hope you have
plenty of empty cells.

Arrest them.

I told you, you would
never leave my country alive.

What do you want us to
do with them, Captain?

Captain?

Captain of Police.
Captain of the police. Great.

Put them into a cell
and watch them closely.

I will deal with you
and your friends later.

So much for law and order.

Good.

The Knights of the Road have arrived.
Anyone have a flat?

Yeah, what took you so long?

Did you ever stand on line
at the post office?

If I could impose upon you for a
moment, would you be so kind?

Would you mind looping
this hook around the bars?

The Knight of the Road knows
how to start the engine.

Stand back, gentlemen.
For your safety. Stand back.

What the hell was that?

Go!

It seems our friends are more
resourceful than we expected.

I suspect they're on their way to
Corson's garage to pick up your money.

Yeah, I want to go after them
by myself...

but if we g*ng up on them,
we can tear them apart.

We'll split it
down the middle, 50-50.

I paid for something
that I didn't collect.

In case you don't remember...

that drug shipment is in a cube
in that thing you call a car.

I'll be at Corson's
when they deliver the mail.

We haven't got much time.

Zuniga and Tyler
will be here any minute.

You know they're gonna have
an army with them, Hannibal.

Well, I hope so.

Come on out, Corson!

We'll talk on my terms now.

You've got 10 seconds to come
out with the money, senor.

Or, I'll take these trucks, and
I'll knock your house down.

Hey, Murdock, there's no
business like tow business.

Nice.

Well, what can I say? You saved
my business and my life.

I could never thank you enough.

You did fine.

Tyler's in jail, so is Zuniga.

You know, the Mexican people don't like
a crooked cop any more than we do.

You know, it's pretty incredible
how you lured Zuniga into the U.S.

We couldn't take a police
captain to the police.

Even though we tried.

Well...

You know, I really meant
what I said before.

I could fall for you if...

Yeah, I know.

Maybe someday.
If I'm in town...

I'll give you a call.

Mr. Corson! I just...

I just got to have it. Murdock,
you can have anything you want.

I know I can't be a Knight
of the Road forever...

but I need something as a remembrance
of those stirring days of yesteryear.

Where's the big guy?

My kemosabe.
I want him to share...

Right here.

No, big guy!
You're making a mistake!

Knights of the Road don't fly.
You're thinking of Superman.

Wait, friend. Put me down!

- Colonel!
- B.A., let him down.

- Okay.
- No! Wait!