S, are you hungry?
Grab a plate.
I'm not hungry,
corky
And after you see
what's in this box
None of you will be either.
Here it is--
the new set for f.y.i.
What new set?
You've got
to be kidding.
Miles,
I'm senior anchor.
I should have been consulted
weeks ago.
I agree, jim,
but unfortunately
Mitchell baldwin,
whose title outranks yours
Likes to do things
his way.
He calls it a set
for the st century
Designed to move f.y.i.
Into the future.
It's ugly.
It's weird.
It's stupid.
It was my idea.
I pitched this set
to the network five years ago.
They laughed at me.
Called me
silverberg the dreamer.
Are you so desperate
for recognition from baldwin
You'll take credit
for the dumbest idea ever?
Yes.
There are no chairs.
Where are we expected to sit?
No, don't tell me.
In the st century
Newspeople will have
no need to sit.
We'll all be expected
to stand around
Our legs now
grotesquely overdeveloped.
And those rebels among us
who still enjoy sitting
Will be shipped off
To some penal colony
somewhere.
Jim, you would do the news
from these podium things.
See, there you are,
standing.
Hey, that looks
just like you, jim.
Oh, and this must be...
Oh, man, they drew me
with less hair than I have now.
It's the future,
frank.
Did you think
you would have more hair?
Look, I think
we all agree
This set is
a huge mistake.
I say
we confront baldwin
And tell him
we don't want it.
Come on, murph,
we don't have a sh*t.
We haven't gotten
our way with him once.
The guy is impossible
to manipulate.
No one's impossible
to manipulate.
I think I've finally gotten
a handle on him.
He respects strength.
Every time we give in to him,
it hurts us.
The next time we see him,
we play hardball.
We say no set, no way.
He's the dreamer!
Frank, what are you
doing with that?
Coloring in my hair.
Good afternoon,
everybody.
Hey, mitchell,
how's it going?
I see you've had a chance
To present our exciting new set
to the team.
So, the new f.y.i.
What do you think?
I think it's a piece of...
Genius!
We all think
It's a brilliant
design concept.
As brilliant now
As it would have been
five years ago
But we are having
A few minor problems.
What kind of problems?
We hate it.
Look, I'm aware that
the set I've proposed here--
A two-level, state-of-the-art,
high-definition
Multi monitor media environment--
Is a radical departure
From what
you're used to--
Fake wood and carpet.
(Laughing:)
fake wood and carpet.
But I am convinced
that this is the proper set
To propel f.y.i.
Into the new millennium.
We've shown it
to focus groups
And it tested very well.
With who,
the klingons?
All this talk of a new set
is ridiculous.
When I started out
A set was a desk,
a globe, a clock.
Occasionally, betty furness
would walk through
Trying to hawk a refrigerator.
Those were simpler times.
Times when people sat.
Look, mitchell,
f.y.i.and that fake wood
Have been very successful
for years.
Listen to us.
We know what works.
Well, if you feel
that strongly
I'll have
to think about it.
I thought
you'd see it my way.
I said I'd think
about it.
Oh, and murphy
I'm sponsoring
this corporate dinner
For the washington inner-city
scholarship fund
And your presence
would help raise more money.
Don't say another word.
I'd be happy
to help you out.
Terrific.
Sunday night, : .
My assistant
will send directions.
Better yet,
why don't we go together?
That way, we take one car,
save fuel emissions
And make
al gore happy.
Pick me up at : .
Fine. : It is.
I'll see you then.
Well...
So much for the hardball.
We're still stuck
with this awful set
And on top of it
He got you to do
a favor for him.
Corky, he didn't get me
to go to the dinner.
I wanted to go.
That way, I get him
out of the office--
His center of power--
And into my house--
my center of power.
We'll drive in my car--
My center of power on wheels.
With each little battle I win
I'm setting up a pattern
for the bigger one
And he won't even know
it's happening.
You just wait.
By monday morning,
we'll have our old set back.
Um, frank, I think
you can stop coloring now.
You look like wayne newton.
Can you believe it?
He's late.
Baldwin's never late.
I know what he's doing.
He's trying to get
the upper hand.
By asking him to come at : ,
I had the power.
By showing up late,
he's taken it back.
I hate this.
You know,
sometimes your voice
Takes on the exact timbre
of a ten-foot truck
Going under
a nine-foot overpass.
(Doorbell ringing)
Eldin, that's him.
Tell him I'm not ready.
What do you mean?
You are ready.
Eldin, just lie to him.
Whoa! Lie?
Eldin bernecky does not lie.
I have to keep him waiting
To get back
the balance of power.
Make up a reason
why I'm late.
No!
That's underhanded.
It's against
my personal code of ethics
And... When it comes to lying,
I'm real bad.
Oh, like that's ever stopped
anyone in washington.
Just do it!
(Doorbell ringing)
Hello. Is this
murphy brown's residence?
Yeah. Come in.
So, is murphy ready?
She's, uh...
There was a terrible accident.
She came running
down these stairs
And she tripped
Just at the moment
that I was working
With exposed
electrical wiring.
She fell on the live wires.
Bzzzt!
Took on about ,
volts.
b*rned her hair
Her dress
Knocked out some of her teeth.
I'm her brother,
leon shrimley.
Will you get down here?!
Mitchell, hi.
I didn't hear the bell.
I see you've met...
Your brother,
leon shrimlack.
Shrimley! Ley!
I have to go now.
You...
That's avery's nanny.
You'll have to excuse him.
He accidentally swallowed
Play-doh earlier.
I hope I haven't
kept you waiting.
Actually, I was
a little late myself.
Oh, is that right?
I hadn't noticed.
Uh, well, I guess
we should go.
Since you were kind enough
to drive here
Why don't I drive
the rest of the way?
I'll just get my keys.
It's okay, murphy.
I like to drive.
Besides,
I'm parked behind you.
This is a little embarrassing
But, uh, I tend to get carsick
riding in the passenger seat.
All that weaving and bobbing.
I think I should drive.
Oh, you'll be fine.
I have a range rover.
The ride is as smooth as ice.
You don't know ice
Till you've ridden
in my porsche.
I'm too big.
I can't fit in a porsche.
Oh.
After you.
Uh-huh, after me. Um...
You know, since we're going
to be taking your car
Why don't I
Supply the driving music?
You listen to country, right?
This is your chance
to hear some motown.
I'll just get my tapes.
(Country music playing)
Again, murphy, I'm sorry.
I completely forgot
that my cd system
Doesn't play tapes.
Yeah, it's funny the things
one forgets sometimes.
(Twanging along
with the music)
Uh, mitchell, you know,
I think I'm getting
That car-sickness thing
I mentioned.
You don't mind
if I turn this down?
Oh, no problem.
Would you like fresh air?
That might be nice.
Your power window
Doesn't seem to be working.
No, they're fine.
I have it set
So I control all the windows.
Tell me how far
you want it down.
Maybe it would be easier
if I did it myself.
I don't want to fiddle
with the controls
While I'm driving.
Just say when.
That's too much.
Can you put it up a touch?
Sure.
Smidge more.
More. More.
A little more. More.
Uh, too much.
Just slowly down.
Down a little more.
Why don't I switch it
so you can adjust it?
Oh, okay.
So, this is a range rover.
Not bad...
But couldn't you get
the same effect
By buying a ford explorer
And gluing grand
to the hood?
You might want to take a left.
I know where
I'm going, murphy.
I'm sure you do
But I've lived here
for years.
I might have a little better
lay of the land.
I think I've planned
this out pretty good.
We'll just take rhode island
over to first
Then first to bryant, and...
(Sucking air)
What?
Nothing.
This route is fine, murphy.
I didn't say it wasn't.
We'll get there.
Of course,
we'll be a little late
But, you're fine with that.
I am.
Good.
How late?
Worried?
No.
Ten, minutes.
It's not the ideal scenario
Given that you're
the chairman of the event
But I'm sure they'll understand
once they see those directions.
You can get us there sooner?
Take your next left
Go for three blocks,
right under the bridge
Another left
Through
the industrial park.
We'll be there
in nine minutes flat.
Nine minutes.
I'm counting.
So, mitchell...
We've been working together
for a while now.
I think you've come
to respect my opinion
On matters regarding f.y.i.
You know, editorial policy,
set design, that kind of thing.
Whoa. Get some shocks
on this baby, why don't you?
This street is all dug up.
Look at that sign.
They're doing road work.
That sign's been there
for years.
We locals don't pay
any attention to it.
The road's fine.
We'll be there
In eight minutes
and seconds, trust me.
Well, I usually
don't like driving on...
The road is fine?!
Boy, the braking distance
on this thing
Leaves something
to be desired.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
So what's the story?
It's your oil pan.
How is it?
I won't know
until I look at it.
So it's..?
It's not here.
I knew it.
As soon as it happened,
I said to myself
"This car is minus
one oil pan."
Thank you, murphy.
What about the muffler?
It's no good.
Gone?
Gone would be
A big improvement.
It's wrapped
around the rear axle.
If we'd been driving
my porsche
We could have maneuvered
around that pothole.
If we had stuck to my route
There would have been
no pothole.
Your route
would have taken forever.
As opposed to yours-- journey
to the center of the earth?
I see what's
happening here, huh?
Two people feeling
The strain
of the situation
Looking to assign blame.
You got to channel
your anger at this moment.
Divert it away
from each other
And use this time
For introspection
and personal cleansing.
Oh, yeah. We'll do that.
Can you fix this?!
Excuse me, murphy.
This is my car.
I can handle this.
I know how to talk
to a mechanic.
Hector, do you think
you can repair the damage?
Ooh, that was
very impressive.
You should teach
a seminar.
Why don't you go back
To playing with
the air compressor?
Nah, I'm sick of that.
Look, we're in
a big hurry.
Can you patch things
so I can drive it now?
It will take at least
an hour, maybe two.
Oh, wonderful.
This is just wonderful.
Where's your phone?
I'll call a cab.
I think not.
I've only seen one cab
in this neighborhood after dark
And it was in
a high-speed chase.
My friends, you're going
to be here for a while
So I suggest you relax,
make yourself comfortable.
(Snapping fingers)
This is unbelievable.
My car is trashed.
I'm sponsoring a dinner
I'm not going to make it to
And I'm starving.
What a lovely evening.
Thank you.
Oh, like I'm having fun?
Just how I wanted
to spend my evening--
Being analyzed
by pennzoil's answer
To sigmund freud.
I need another quarter.
Don't eat stuff
out of the vending machine.
Those malted milk balls
are growing fur.
I don't care. I'm hungry.
Do you or do you not have
a quarter?
Okay,
but if I'm kicking in half
I want something I can eat too.
Let's get
cheese and crackers.
No. Peanut butter cups.
Cheese and crackers.
I was the one
who came up with the idea.
I should have
first choice
And I like
peanut butter cups.
That's a fascinating bit
of personal information.
Shopping for you will be
much easier this christmas.
Peanut butter cups
are more filling.
Cheese and crackers
are healthier.
Peanut butter cups
are easier to split.
Cheese and crackers
cover two food groups--
Dairy and grain,
while peanut butter cups
Cover only one--
the lard family.
I want
the peanut butter cups.
Okay, okay. I don't want to be
a big baby, like some people.
And I mean big baby.
Get the peanut butter cups.
What are you doing?
Where are my cheese
and crackers?
Forget your cheese
and crackers--
Where's my
peanut butter cups?
It's jammed.
Well, now you've done it.
Me? You're the one
who cheated
And pulled the knob
at the same time.
You got to have
things go your way.
You twist everything
so it happens
When you want,
the way you want.
"Up a little.
Down a smidge."
Me? If anyone has
to have things their way
It's you,
mr. Shows-up-a-little-late
Mr. I-forgot-i-have-a-cd-player.
You've manipulated
every situation all night
So you'd come out on top.
You only agreed
to come tonight
Because you thought
you could manipulate me
Into changing
the set design.
Which is what
you wanted me to think
But I saw through your scheme.
I am the one person
you can't manipulate.
That drives you crazy
Because you always
have to be in complete control.
I have to be in control?
If that's not the pot
calling the kettle black.
Now it's a black thing.
It is not a black thing--
it is a murphy brown thing.
Because of you,
my car is ruined.
Because of you,
my banquet's ruined
And because of you
I never got my damned
peanut butter cups.
I want
my peanut butter cups!
Cheese and crackers!
Cheese and crackers!
(Drill whirring)
I cannot stand idly by
And let this happen.
With all the hate there is
in the world
All the discord
and mistrust
We got to do everything we can
To treat each other
with love and respect.
I thought the two of you would
know that better than anyone.
You, who...
Have a forbidden love.
I do what I can.
You... You are not easy,
you know that.
Oh, like you're
a walk in the park.
I've never met anyone
so obsessed
With being right.
With the exception
Of myself, of course.
I know what you mean.
There was a moment when I looked
at you, and I thought
"Wow, there I am...
If I'd been born a loud,
blonde, white woman."
So...
Where do we go from here?
It's pretty clear we'll never
be able to manipulate one other.
So I guess the only other choice
is to be completely honest.
We don't trust each other,
we're both obsessive
And we'll run down anyone
who gets in our way.
Friend?
Friends.
♪♪ Love is
a many splendored thing ♪♪
♪♪ It's the april rose... ♪♪
See, in my design,
I had podiums too.
Look at the date--
Five years ago.
How about that?
Really interesting,
miles.
Morning, guys.
How did it go
with baldwin?
Do I get to sit?
Take it easy.
Let me get some coffee.
Actually, mitchell and I
Never got around to talking
about the set last night.
Why not?
Will you relax?
Everything is fine.
It's better than fine.
The reason I can say that
Is because something
very special happened
Between mitchell and me.
Oh, my god!
Murphy!
You slept with him?
I hope you're all happy.
Murphy gave herself
to the boss
Just so jim
could have a chair.
Thank you, slugger.
I didn't sleep with him.
We stopped playing games
and were honest with each other.
We developed a closeness,
and-- dare I say it?--
A friendship I think
we'll both treasure
For years to come.
Oh, yeah. She slept with him.
Will you stop it?
I don't think we have to worry
about that new set anymore
Because one of the added bonuses
of friendship
Is that it's a great way
to manipulate someone.
(Elevator bell ringing)
Good morning, team.
Miles:
hi, mitchell.
I brought you something
on my way upstairs.
Cheese and crackers.
(Laughing)
You had to be there.
Since we're all here
Why don't we close up
on this set thing?
Bottom line, we hate it.
It makes us uncomfortable
And that's not good
for the show.
Just being honest,
like we agreed.
Well, murphy,
I see your point.
Okay, the old set stays.
And I hope this proves,
once and for all
That my personal agenda
Takes a back seat
to the good of the show.
Maybe we can all be
less suspicious of each other
And work to make the show
that much better.
I pitched that idea
five years ago.
What, miles?
I couldn't quite hear you.
Nothing.
Just stuff you say in a group.
By the way, we're going to have
to cut the budgets
For your individual stories
by percent.
You can't do that.
What?
I'm sorry.
It's belt-tightening time.
Ooh, you are good.
You are really good.
I never even saw it coming.
There never was
any new set.
It was a cover to cushion
the budget cuts.
Would I go through all that
just to get my way?
Yes. It's exactly
what I would have done.
I only got the word
on the cuts this morning.
Exactly what I
would have said.
We had an understanding.
It's like the words
are coming out of my mouth.