04x17 - New Guy in Town

[bunniefuu]

Theodore Carlton Hunsacker.
Heh. That's quite a mouthful.

Family came over on
the Mayflower, huh?

They wanted to, but they missed
the boat by about 222 years.

What should I call you? Ted?

T.C. We got a speeder
coming up on the right, Jon.

Yep.

They said you were good before
you transferred from cruisers.

Good? Did you see his records?

Don't know why Getraer bothered
to have Jon ride him around.

Everybody gets ridden around when
they go from cars to bikes. Probation.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Well, in Hunsacker's
case, it was just a formality.

- The guy never makes mistakes.
- Hey, everybody makes mistakes.

I don't care how great
they are, sooner or later.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Well, if this were a
pool, I'd take later. Latest.

Oh, I'll take sooner, Grossie.

He's bound to mess up at least once by
the end of next week. Say, Friday morning.

Got you.

- Friday a.m.
- Okay.

Yeah, I think we got
something going here.

I don't know. You guys really wanna bet on
how quick a new guy does something wrong?

Hey, we're not talking
about anything big.

A guy with Hunsacker's reputation
doesn't do that kind of foul up.

He better not, Grossie.

He's out with my partner.

Okay, what's the fastest way...

the eastbound Ventura Freeway
to Hollywood Freeway North?

The off-ramp to the right-hand
lane of Riverside Drive...

Camarillo Street exit.

[TIRES SCREECH]

Watch out, Jon! Look out!

That was no accident.

You all right?

Yeah, I'm all right.

I'll call it in on the radio.

Stay on your box so your
backup will know your 20, all right?

Sure you're all right?

All right. Come on, T.C.
Go on before you lose him.

Go on.

[ENGINE STARTS]

[SIREN WAILING]

Fifteen Mary 3.

I need backup
for... Mary 3 Adam...

eastbound Foothill...
approximate...

[SIREN WAILING]

WOMAN [ON RADIO]: All units, vicinity
of Foothill Boulevard and Roxbury...

7 Mary 3 is involved
in a possible 11-99.

May need assistance.
Units responding identify.

Seven Mary 4 responding.
Did Jon say what the trouble is?

Negative, Mary 4. Transmission
broken, unable to copy.

What happened to Mary 3 Adam?

Mary 3 Adam. In pursuit
of hit-and-run suspect.

Larklin Terrace heading west.

Backup units can intercept
where Larklin hits Fairborn.

- How is he?
- Nothing broken as far as I can tell.

Jon? Hey, Jon.

Jon, it's me, Ponch.

Jon? Can you hear me?

Yeah.

Give me a hand, Ponch.

No, man. Don't move,
all right? Just stay put.

Don't push it, all right?

[TIRES SCREECH]

Suspect turning
right onto Clarington.

[TIRES SCREECHING]

[POP MUSIC PLAYING OVER RADIO]

Lady, will you move it?
That's a hit-and-run driver.

- It's stalled.
- Well, just pull up, won't you?

[MUSIC STOPS]

- I'm in reverse. I'm sorry.
- All right, ma’am.

Mary 3 Adam. Suspect
last seen doubling back...

off of Clarington onto
Hungerford Avenue.

- Breaking off.
- I feel terrible.

If the radio hadn't been so
loud, I could've heard you...

and I could've stopped.

Come on, let's roll.

I'll escort.

Is it bad?

Why didn't you stick
around to find out?

T.C.: He was on his feet
when I left him, Ponch.

He told me to go after
the guy. He'd call it in.

He didn't look hurt to
you or anything? Huh?

Shaken up, yes.

- Hurt? He said he...
- Don't you have any instinct?

Walking wounded, they call them.

He's been Baker's
partner how many years?

Sure he'd have the instincts.
I gotta take Jon at his word.

Hey, look, don't
worry about it, okay?

Well, I guess I'd be a little
jumpy if he was my partner too.

Take it easy.

MAN: It worked like a charm.

Your timing was perfect.

[PANTING] I know.

Did you k*ll him?

The bike hit him pretty hard.

But I'm not sure.

- I wish I saw it.
- Robert saw it.

Oh, yeah. I forgot.

Your eyes are his TV camera.

Don't get smart.

I'm trying to get you to feel
what it's like to be identical.

You didn't have a pain
every time Robert had a pain?

I had a pain when he d*ed.

Okay.

So we faked that
Corsican brother stuff a lot.

We had a lot of laughs.

When those two cops
ran him into that wall...

I hurt too.

I was his wife.

But you don't hear him talking to
you in the middle of the night like I do.

And I promised him...

they'd pay.

The both of them.

See? I told you, Grossie,
it's not so simple, is it?

I'll get it.

See this red piece here? All
I have to do is turn it around.

And then?

Oh, I'm not so sure about that.

No?

GROSSMAN: Hmm.

You want to try it?

That thing's had me
climbing the walls for two days.

How'd you do that?

Don't work so hard on the
trees. Concentrate on the forest.

Hi, everybody.

- Hey, Ponchy.
- Hey, Ponch. How's Jon?

Slight concussion, shoulder sprain, they
said. Should be out of there by tomorrow.

Great. I'm glad to
hear that, Ponch.

Listen, T.C., I was a
little hard on you out there.

Jon did tell me he told
you to go after that turkey.

And, well...

I guess I didn't win
the pool on you after all.

You guys are betting
on me to mess up?

Well, we just figured your
reputation was a little exaggerated.

How many are in this pool?

Let's see. Um

Nearly everyone on the shift.

What's left?

Tuesday afternoon
and, uh, Friday afternoon.

I'll take Friday.

- Hope you don't feel insulted.
- No, flattered is what I feel.

GROSSMAN: Is that modest?

Is that gracious?

No wonder Bon's making him guest
of honor at her Sunday barbecue.

- Barbecue?
- A welcome-to-the-squad celebration.

- What do you say?
- I'd love it. What time?

We eat about 6.

Uh-oh. I'm gonna be a
little late. I hope that's okay.

Sure, if that's the
way it's gotta be.

President wants him in Washington
to advise on the Middle East.

- No, look, there's this concert.
- Bob Seger's at Hollywood Bowl.

No, they're broadcasting
the symphony concert

from London, and I
gotta be home to tape it.

You're gonna be late
because of Beethoven?

Havergal Brian's
Gothic Symphony.

Well... that makes a difference.

- Havergal.
- Yeah, Gothic Symphony.

Old Havy.

Must be some symphony. Half the state of
California's supposed to be in the choir.

Heh. Sounds loud.

Hope he's not one of the guys
that go around putting on airs.

He never did put anything on me.

And he didn't talk
about opera or anything?

Never had a chance,
we were too busy.

Then my, uh, secret admirer
showed up in his van. Heh.

Wasn't his van. License
check turned it up stolen.

Yeah, I'm real surprised.

Hey, I gotta go. I
gotta pick up Karen...

and get out to
Bonnie's barbecue.

Oh, Karen, uh...?
Ahem. Karen Banister?

You finally got a date
with her, huh? Ungh.

It only took me
three months, man.

Yeah.

Well, have a good
time, would you?

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Get well.

[POP MUSIC PLAYING
OVER STEREO IN DISTANCE]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[CAR APPROACHING]

[CAR DOOR OPENS]

[CAR DOOR SHUTS]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Is this where they're
honoring what's-his-name,

that brilliant,
easygoing, erudite...

- yet humble...?
- T.C.

- Yes.
- Heh. Come on in.

I think you probably know
everybody. Or almost everybody.

- Food's right here.
- Thank you.

- Except for what's on Grossie's plate.
- Oh, my, my.

-Thanks a lot.
BONNIE: Excuse me.

You're here sooner than expected.
Did they cancel the concert?

- No, it's only two hours long.
- T.C.

- Hey, how you doing, Ponch?
- Have a good time.

- T.C. Hunsacker, Karen Banister.
- Hello.

- Hi. What's only two hours long?
- Oh, the Gothic Symphony.

It's a very rare piece
of classical music.

Yeah, by Havergal Brian.

He has those marvelous
choral movements.

I thought they were
broadcasting that next Friday.

No, sorry, it was tonight.

- Oh, no. Did you tape it, I hope?
- I sure did.

-Reel-to-reel and cassette.
KAREN: Oh, was it beautiful?

T.C.: It was great.

Um, would you like me
to run a little interference?

I bet you I can get him into
the kitchen somehow or another.

No, let them talk, Bonnie.

I'm the one that's
taking her home.

Ponch?

Hey.

I wanted to tell you I let that
conversation with Karen go on too long...

and I just, uh...

Hey, I enjoyed
listening to all that.

I learned something, all right?

- I'll see you Monday, okay?
- Thanks.

Don't start the car,
Ponch. Get Karen out.

Come on, man. What now?

Last time I saw this was
in the Army. Demolition.

It's the insulation
off a detonator wire.

- Get out of the car, Karen.
- Something wrong?

Honey, get out of the car.

GETRAER:
Combination plastique...

and dynamite.

There's enough expl*sive here,
Frank, to create a crater 10 feet wide.

T.C. thinks it was
wired by a pro.

Maybe somebody in
m*llitary demolitions.

Yeah, it's worth considering.

Look, uh, give me
some names, you know?

People you've arrested. Uh...

People who said
they'd get even or...

Well, I don't know, you tell me.

What do you think I've been
thinking about all weekend?

We figured we'd go over it
during patrol this morning.

Uh-uh. Baker's gonna
be in the file room.

He's gonna be there this
afternoon. All week if need be.

He's going over every single
case you and he ever worked on.

The computer could do that.

The computer can't tell us who
might be carrying a grudge for you.

Jon's really gonna like
being cooped up down there.

You should've heard
him in the hospital.

Look, he took a pretty
rough tumble. I don't

think I want him on
the road for a while.

Anyway, let's let our friend think
he's halfway home for a while.

Sure, why not?

I'll be playing target
out there on the b*at.

Well, Hunsacker
will back you up.

- Okay.
- Heh-heh.

Well, Frank, uh, try to
show a little enthusiasm.

This is the officer
that saved your life.

Don't get me wrong, sarge,
he's as good a cop as they come.

Uh, then what's the wrinkle?

Does he have to be as good
as they come all the time?

Uh, I don't get it.

Well, the guy graduates at
the top of his academy class.

On the pavement, it's like he's
got eyes in the back of his head.

And if you wanna know
about something, he'll

tell you. More than
you wanted to know.

I mean, if he
wasn't so perfect...

maybe the rest of us
would feel more comfortable.

Uh-huh.

So, uh, you mean having
such a good example around...

- is cramping your style?
- No, that's not it.

We're not machines out there,
sarge. We depend on each other.

A little snafu now and then
kind of makes us feel human.

Kind of puts us in
touch with each other.

I read you.

I just hope when T.C.
does fumble out there,

that you treat him just
like everybody else.

You know I will.

[SIGHS]

GROSSMAN: Hey, Ponch.

T.C's gonna come bowl
With us tomorrow night.

- That's terrific.
- You better watch out.

He promised to
sharpen up my game.

-You got your work cut out
for you. GROSSMAN: Thanks.

Well, it's been a while since I rolled
a line, so don't expect too much.

Sounds like a setup to me.

Aw. Catch you later.

[ENGINES STARTING]

I just figured something out. If
you were just a little arrogant...

a little self-centered...

you'd be a little easier
to take, you know?

Well, maybe... Look out!

What are you, crazy?!

[TIRES SCREECHING]

That's the last sh*t
he's gonna take at me.

Ponch, wait.

Ponch.

Ponch, he's just a
deuce. I spotted him...

I spotted him weaving
while we were talking.

[MAN MUTTERING]

Ponch, stop it!

He could still be the
guy that came at Jon.

Ponch, different
face, different man.

-How many guys you think
are after you? MAN: Huh?

[PANTING]

Maybe you better take this one.

I better... I better call it in.

All right, over you go.

Put your right hand
on the top of your head.

- Hey, Jon.
- Hey, sarge.

Any, uh, possibles yet?

Yeah, a lot of possibles,
but not many logicals.

Heh. Since when
is m*rder logical?

Oh, yeah. How's Ponch doing?

He and T.C. thought they had a
suspect this morning. They didn't.

Well, at least they're out
in clean air and sunshine.

I don't know, Jon. At least you don't
have any vans coming at you in here.

Thanks.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

- Feel like lunchtime?
- Definitely.

- Today I buy.
- I accept.

But I choose the restaurant.

All right, but please, T.C...

I'm always open to expanding
my horizons, you know...

but nothing too fancy.

Trust me.

Ah, T.C, T.C., amigo, how
are you doing, senioritos?

Meet a friend,
Frank Poncherello.

- Frank, meet Paco.
- My pleasure, senor.

I smell the aroma of a kitchen
where things are made from scratch.

We don't need those, Paco.

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

All right. How often do
you eat in this place?

As often as I can.

You don't look like Grossman.

Hang out at the doughnut
shop, you look like Grossman.

[LAUGHS]

How you feeling?

I'm better. Thank you.

Got one question, though.

You were so sure that deuce
in the van wasn't coming for me.

I told you, I saw him weaving.

Well, he could've
been setting up an alibi.

Manslaughter pays a
lot less than m*rder one.

Your man's not gonna come after you in
a van again, Ponch. Not after missing Jon.

- Heh-heh. Now he's clairvoyant.
- No, it stands to reason.

The van didn't work for the guy.

He's too aggressive to
try the same thing twice.

Hot?

Well, it's all a
matter of taste.

Oh.

MAN: I'm gonna drive this car to the
open field alongside Foothill Boulevard.

WOMAN: Yeah, I
know where that is.

And then leave it.

- Abandoned?
- Right.

Then I'm gonna take this
package and wire it on the inside.

The minute Poncherello...

goes to open up the
door, check out the car...

boom.

How can you be
sure it'll be him?

Because you are
gonna lead him there.

Hey, partner. How
you doing, Jon?

Hey, Ponch, sit down. I want
to show you something, okay?

Here it is. Beck.

Remember Robert Beck?

We chased him after he robbed
that mom-and-pop grocery store...

- near the Cypress on-ramp?
- When was that? Three years ago?

Four years ago. Remember he
lost control, hit the wall on 5th?

Yeah, but he can't be after us now. He
was dead-on-arrival at County General.

Yeah, he was. But
his twin brother wasn't.

Then that's it.

He said it was all our fault because we
went after his brother in the first place.

Yeah, he was
screaming for justice.

- And he knows expl*sives.
- Army demolitions.

T.C. scores again.

Well, it's a good chance,
but sarge is gonna

check it out with all
the other possibles.

Well, listen, I gotta
go. Catch you later.

Hey, Ponch?

Did, uh, T.C. make a
winner out of anybody yet?

You kidding? You
would've heard about it.

Good. I still have
a chance, then.

I gotta go. See you later.

Now, tell me, Ponch, when
do I get to corrupt your taste...

with a trip to that
Picasso exhibit?

Hey, I don't think I'm quite
ready for three-eyed women yet.

[TIRES SCREECH]

Let's go for it, man.

[SIREN CHIRPING]

I'll take it.

I'm gonna need your license
and registration, ma’am.

I admit I was going fast,
officer, but I do have a reason.

You're allowed to plead guilty with an
explanation when you appear in court.

But...

don't you wanna hear
why I had to drive like that?

PONCH: If it's a matter
of life or death, yes, I do.

Is it life or death?

No, officer.

I couldn't really say
it was life or death.

Please drive under
the speed limit, then.

It's your life too.

Thanks.

- Ponch.
- What?

- I think I know that woman.
- Yeah, from where?

I can't remember.

I saw an exhibit like this once
at the Museum of Modern Art.

Abandoned Dream.

Laid out a couple
of million for it.

Bet they wouldn't
pay much for this one.

It's funny, that lady could have pulled
over a couple hundred yards back.

Yeah, but she didn't. She just
kept on moving until she got to here.

By this car.

I got it. She was the lady in the
station wagon that cut in front of me...

when I was chasing
that van that swiped Jon.

PONCH: Same woman?

I'm good at faces, Ponch,
and I remember the glasses.

Door handle.

That was the door handle?

Hey, I'm just warming up.

It's a nice night. You sure you
want to try bowling with that shoulder?

Oh, yeah, yeah, and I promise
you I won't ask you for a handicap.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Well, let's hear it.

What did you uncover on
Robert Beck's twin brother?

Uh, he's dead, Ponch.

I figured that one had fizzled.

k*lled in some sort of
industrial accident not

two months after his
brother hit that wall.

That's great.

Perfect, some jerk's
out there gunning for us...

and we don't have
the slightest idea why.

Yeah, really gives you a
secure feeling, doesn't it?

I tell you one thing I'm gonna do
before I roll one down that alley.

Ask T.C. to check that
nobody put plastique...

in the thumbhole.

[BOTH LAUGH]

And then I'm gonna
bowl my usual 220...

and make him look like an ordinary
human being like the rest of us.

There you go.

[BOTH LAUGH]

It's them.

Right.

Okay, Robert.

- This is gonna be it. This is for you.
- Just do it!

- Move it, move it!
- Move. Come on.

We'll wait till they come out.

[ALL CHEERING]

MAN 1: Go get them, Frank!

Hey, terrific.

Keep it up, you might top 220.

Of course T.C. will top 280.

MAN 2: Now's the big sh*t here.

MAN 1: Go get them, Grossman.

You got it.

MAN 3: Come on, Gross.

- Garbage again.
- But it's consistent garbage.

- You've got a natural hook.
- Well, too bad the lanes aren't curved.

No, look, all you have to do is
compensate on your delivery.

- And relax. Don't choke up. Huh?
- Thanks a lot, Harlan. You made my day.

Harlan's analysis is right,
but I suggest you forget it.

- Best suggestion I've heard all evening.
- Now, look, all right...

think Zen.

The mind becomes the target.

The will becomes the motion.

Look. They're already falling.

I can do it.

You already have.

[ALL CHEERING]

- That's a boy. Good one.
- Thanks a lot.

There's nothing you're
not good at, is there?

Lots of things.

Astrophysics, molecular biology.

I never did get a handle
on pre-Socratic metaphysics.

Yeah, we'll take
your word for it.

[SIGHS]

And there is another thing.

I don't have much
luck keeping friends.

No, I don't have much
luck making friends.

I don't know, my
shoulder's a little stiff.

-Yeah. Ha-ha.
BONNIE: Right. Sure.

[ALL CHEERING]

MAN 4: Good sh*t.

[BONNIE GIGGLES]

Go ahead, I can
hold my concentration.

Thanks.

[BALL THUDS]

It's just a matter of
watching and waiting now.

But this time, Lina, we're
gonna get them for sure.

How was I supposed to know that Poncherello
would have the same partner Baker did?

Don't forget, I want him
dead as much as you do.

- Where are you going?
- To get some cigarettes, do you mind?

- Well, don't you want me...?
- No, you just stay right here, all right?

I'll be right back.

Jon, I'm putting you back
on the road tomorrow.

Thanks, sarge.

I figure anybody who can b*at me at
bowling can handle himself on the highway.

- All right.
- See you later.

- See you.
- Good game.

[ENGINE STARTS]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

What does it take
to make you die?

GETRAER: Maiden
name, Lina Williams.

Married Robert
Beck, August 8, 1974.

So you weren't so far off when you
thought it had to be Beck's brother.

I guess we just don't think
of women as being so deadly.

She seems to have learned about expl*sives
from books and her late brother-in-law.

Anyway, this pretty
much closes this case.

Have fun on the
freeways, fellas.

Wait a minute. How could she have
been driving the van that ran me down...

the one that T.C. chased?

She's the woman in
the station wagon, right?

We're way ahead of you, boys.

Lina Beck was asked that
exact question pretty early on.

Well, go on, sarge.
Keep us on the hook.

The driver of the van
was somebody she paid.

A family friend from back east
who got cold feet and flew home fast.

We have inquiries
with police back there.

But until we get confirmation...

don't drop your guard, huh?

You know what I feel like?

I feel like the world is
back in one piece again.

I'd just like to hear the final
word on that Beck woman's story.

Right, but I was thinking
about you and me.

I hate to admit it, but I'd much
rather ride the b*at with you...

than be stuck in some file room.

Ha-ha. Well, I think it calls
for a little celebration, partner.

Yeah? How about lunch?

Exactly.

And I'll bet you
know just the spot.

Now, how'd you
guess that, huh? Ha-ha.

Hey, I thought you knew
all the good salsa spots.

Chalk up another one for T.C.

Last time I saw T.C., he was under
300 tons of paperwork this morning.

Lots of pencil time to get
through when you finish probation.

Mm-hm. Hey, are these hot?

Like T.C. says, it's
a matter of taste.

- Oh, is that a fact?
- Mm-hm.

One.

Two.

- Three.
- Three.

[PONCH SIGHS]

[CHUCKLES]

BAKER: What, uh—?

What was that dish you ordered?

[BOTH SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

[PONCH LAUGHS]

Yeah.

Yeah, well, remind me not
to order it again, would you?

[PONCH LAUGHS]

Hey, by the way,
how's your shoulder?

Ah, it's a lot better.

[ENGINES START]

- Sarge.
- Hm?

Completed my evaluation
reports. Everything in triplicate.

New York informs us that all Lina
Beck statements about her accomplice...

- are bogus.
- Doesn't make sense.

- No, no, not at all.
- Hope everything's in order.

Triplicate.

- Triplicate.
- Huh?

Triplicate. Don't you get it?

- Get what?
- Oh, I'm surprised at you.

Triplets.

We have to get in touch with a
certain country registrar back east.

To see if the late Robert Beck
had one identical brother or two.

GETRAER: Right.

Ninety-eight, 97...

[TIRES SCREECHING]

We got a speeder 70-plus
coming up on the right.

[SIRENS WAILING]

Hey, behind us, Ponch.

Looks like the
same van that hit me.

Slow down, and let him pass.

[TIRES SCREECH]

Seven Mary 3 and 4 in
pursuit of reckless van...

210 east of Yarnell.

Are you sure?

Thanks.

Right.

We think there's a Beck brother
still gunning for you, do you read?

Both of them are dead.

You're not gonna
believe this, but we have

confirmation of a
third brother. A triplet.

Keep your eyes and ears open.

Got it.

Ponch, you leave your
saddlebag unlatched?

No way!

- b*mb!
- Let's do it.

Now, while the road is clear.

Put your left hand on your head.

Put your hand on your head.

Look familiar?

Three of a kind.

Remember this face...

- because you're gonna see it again.
- We can wait the 20 years.

- Wanna call it in?
- With pleasure.

GETRAER: Well, T.C...

you now have
official class-1 status...

- as a motor officer.
- Congratulations.

Beginning to feel
like home here.

Okay, now for something
really important.

Yeah, like, who won the pool.

Well, I can't tell
you who won...

but I can tell you when
T.C. made a real beaut.

When?

- Come on, sarge, let's have it.
- Heh.

Well, you have to admit that I just
about laid that triplet idea in your lap...

and you didn't
even pick up on it.

Well, what can I say?

Heh. You should've come
up with it in the first place.

Well, who won?

Ah, yes, Friday afternoon.

Grossie.

The winner is...

Theodore Carlton Hunsacker.

[LAUGHS]

[LAUGHS]

[ALL LAUGHING]