05x09 - Bye, Bye, Bookman

[bunniefuu]

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Any time You meet a payment ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Any time You need a friend ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Any time You're
out from under ♪

♪ Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave When you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit Ripoffs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Scratchin' And survivin' ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Hangin' In a chow line ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky We got 'em ♪

♪ Good times ♪

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Oh my goodness
I can't believe this.

Willona, It is colder in
here than it is outside.

And it's zero degrees out there.

You telling me?

It's so cold in here,

when I shake my
head, my eyeballs rattle.

I better not make any
mistakes in my homework,

'cause my eraser's frozen.

I'll make some
coffee. Good idea.

Willona, will you look at this.

We're shivering and shaking,

and he comes out
dressed like a fool.

Girl, you're only as
warm as you feel.

Simply a case of
mind over matter.

Well, I think you
better stick with matter,

'cause your mind
ain't together, brother.

Will you look at this, Willona.

Thelma,

either the water's
rusty, or you burnt it.

Oh, this is getting
to be too much.

Now we gotta deal
with rusty water.

I'm calling Bookman
right now, honey.

Willona, it won't do any
good, we've already tried,

and Bookman hasn't shown up.

Oh, it's the same old song.

When things break down
and nothing goes right,

good old Bookman
is out of sight.

I'm gonna get some
action here this time.

That's right.

It takes a man to get
results around here,

and I'm determined
to get results.

You know what I
mean? I had enough...

Wow, speaking of results.

Welcome to the igloo,
there, Nanook of the ghetto.

How you doin', honey?

Where you been?

I'll tell you where she's been.

Up and down the halls,
defacing the property.

Booga, what are you
flappin' about now?

Miss Woods, Penny's been
writing all over the floor with chalk.

Is that true, honey?

Yes, Mama.

Penny.

You haven't been
writing naughty words,

have you, Penny?

Of course not.

What have you been writin'?

Numbers.

Writing naughty numbers?

We were playing hopscotch,

and Mr. Bookman's just
mad 'cause I b*at him.

Oh, Booga,

I know you're not
wrapped too tight,

but don't you have
anything better to do

than play hopscotch
with the little kiddies?

Yeah, like fixi"
the water pipes.

Yeah Bookman, what
about getting us some heat?

Look, it ain't cold in
here. I feel comfortable.

That's because you got
enough blubber on you

to keep a bear in hibernation.

Look, I'd like to help you
out, but I ain't got time.

Mrs. Bookman and I are
going to visit her mother.

Oh, come on, Bookman.

Anything to get out of work.

Hey, young lady, if
you got a complaint,

put it in writing.

That's cool, old man,

but who's gonna read it to you?

Look, I'd like to
chitchat with you,

but I ain't got time.

See, Mrs. Bookman's waiting,

and when she's kept waiting,

she becomes a
fire-breathing dragon.

So why don't you
put her in the furnace?

Maybe then we'll get some heat.

I see you made some coffee.

Don't mind if I do.

Ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha.

Like some cream
and sugar in that?

No, thank you.

Mm-mm.

Thelma, this sure is delicious.

I sure wish you'd
show Mrs. Bookman

how to make coffee.

Hers always come
out like rusty water.

I'll get it.

Hi, Mrs. Bookman.

I was just leaving, Violet.

Good.

Mother's waiting,

and you know how mother
hates to be kept waiting.

Is she a dragon too?

What does she mean "too"?

Just childish prattle, my pet.

Mrs. Bookman, would you like

Thelma to show you how
she makes her coffee?

And what is wrong
with my coffee?

Pure nectar, my sweet.

Nectar.

Oh, is that anything
like rusty water?

I can explain
everything, Violet.

We'll discuss it at Mother's.

Violet, we are slowly but
surely freezing to death.

Now, that's more important
than going to your mother's.

More important than
going to see my mother?

Miss Woods, Yes, Violet.

All tenants have
their little problems,

but Mr. Bookman and I
have our personal lives too.

So let's try to be a little
more considerate of others,

shall we?

Otherwise, I'll have Nathan
evict all of you so fast,

your butts will hit the
street before your feet.

Do I make myself clear?

Coming, Nathan?

Yes, dear.

Hey, Bookman,

in the meantime, man, what
are we gonna do for heat?

Get another stick and rub it
up against your brother, J.J.

That does it. that does it!

It's time for some action.

You're right,
Willona. You are right.

Now, I hope you have
something really dirty

and underhanded in mind.

No, I was thinking of something
a little more subtle for Nathan.

How about a hitman from Detroit?

Hey, remember?

Bookman said that if
we had any complaints,

to put them down in writing?

Right.

Well, that's just what
we're going to do.

We'll put them
down in a petition.

A petition?

Willona, it'll only end
up in a pile of red tape

on some politician's desk.

You know, Michael's right.

A petition ain't
strong enough for him.

I vote for the
hitman from Detroit.

Honey, it will be strong enough

if we get every
tenant in this building

to list their
grievances and sign.

Yeah, that'd scare Bookman
into doing something.

Well, let's stop
talking about it,

and let's get on with it.

Oh, Michael, try to
get that window open,

'cause this heat is k*lling me.

Yeah, Michael.

Let some of that
Chicago hawk in here.

Hey, y'all, I'm trying,
but it won't budge.

Wait a minute, Michael,
let me handle that.

Obviously need some
body English in there.

Whoo-hoo.

Lord have mercy.

We asked Bookman for
heat, and he's about to k*ll us.

Boy, now I know what
a TV dinner feels like

in a microwave oven.

Yeah, I tell you.

Our petition got
results, all right.

But instead of
freezing, we're frying.

J.J., try banging on it.

Maybe you'll loosen it.

Heh, heh. Penny, heh, heh.

See, you're just a little girl.

Obviously,

you don't understand
the finer points

of mechanical engineering.

What the situation is here,

is that we've had a
sudden climatic change,

which has added
molecules to the wood,

which, therefore, has taken away

the unloosen-ness
of the situation.

Let me try.

Go ahead, little girl, try.

Just a lucky punch.

Are you sure you're not
a hitman from Detroit?

I'll get it.

Hi, Penny. Is your mother in?

Yes.

I'd like to talk to her.

Why didn't you say so?

Well, welcome to the
steam bath, Bookman.

Booga, Booga, Booga.

What are you
doing to the furnace?

It's over 90 degrees
in this building.

Hey, look, I
apologize, Miss Woods.

And as soon as I can
get down to the basement,

I'll cut the heat down.

Yeah, well, we could lose

half the hot air in this room,

soon as you leave.

Well, is there anything
else need repairing?

Is the water running clear now?

Yes, Yeah.

Uh-huh. How about the stove?

The pilot light working?

Yeah. Oh, that's good.

Nice of you to ask.

Well, you know,
this apartment holds

such fond memories for me.

See this window? First
window I ever replaced.

And probably your last.

You can still see my thumbprint,

right here, where
the putty dried.

Oh, come on, Booga.

Enough of this, waddling
down Memory Lane.

What is going on?

Well, I guess I'm not
myself, after what happened.

What happened, Bookman?

You didn't make your
eviction quota for the week?

I wish it was that simple, man.

Folks, I just got the word.

I'm being replaced.

You being replaced?

Uh, y-you mean, you got fired?

They call it terminated.

I think they gave him the axe.

Hey, uh, Bookman,

Did they give you any reason
why they, uh, let you go?

City don't have to
give you a reason.

Oh, this door's
a little squeaky.

I'll just give it
a little spritz.

Oh, thanks, Bookman,

but you really don't
have to do that.

Yeah, Bookman.

Sit down here and have
a piece of Thelma's cake.

At least that'll make you
forget your other problems.

No thanks. I'm
not really hungry.

Well, maybe just to be sociable.

Uh, Bookman, listen, uh,

Are you positive that they
didn't give you any reason

for f*ring you?

Oh, I'm positive. But
I can live with that.

It's my wife that
I'm worried about.

I can't ever remember
seeing her so upset.

Think back to
your wedding night.

Bookman, uh, w-what
are you gonna do now?

Well, I'll just have
to remain positive.

I mean, you know,
you fall off a horse,

and you just get back on again.

You're gonna become a jockey?

No. I'm gonna go out
and find myself a new job.

Hey, that's the spirit, Bookman.

Yeah, as scarce as they are.

Do you know that 34 percent
of the Black community

is unemployed?

Hold on, I heard
it was 25 percent.

Oh, no, no, no.
That was last week.

But I ain't gonna let
it get me down, baby.

I'm gonna be out
pounding the pavement,

knocking on doors,
till my knuckles ache.

Boy, it sure is nice
to see you grow up

to a beautiful young
woman, Thelma.

Aww, thanks, Bookman.

That's really nice
of you to say that.

No matter how
hard it is to believe.

Hey, you know something else?

This is the first
time, the first time,

we've ever had a chance
to sit down and talk.

I mean, I've always
been so busy,

and I never got a chance to
see what nice folks you really are.

We try, we try.

Listen, we'll see you around,
though, Bookman, you know.

No, the apartment
goes with the job.

And it goes when the job goes.

Oh, Bookman, I'm
sorry to hear that.

Willona, Willona,
please... Call me Booga.

I mean, when a man
is down on his luck,

little things like
that, mean a lot.

Oh, Bookman, you'll
find some place.

Of course you will.

Yeah, shortage of
housing and unemployment.

But these are my problems.

I got no business
putting that on you.

Hey, hey, hey. Don't
take it so hard, honey.

That's what friends are for.

Yeah, some friends we are, huh?

Well...

You ain't gonna have ol'
Nathan Milhous Bookman

to kick around anymore.

Try not to blow your cool.

Well folks, we've just seen
the final days of Bookman.

J.J., a man losing
his job is no joke.

Yeah, and it was our
petition that got him fired.

Yeah, and he was so
sweet and nice to all of us.

He has no idea... we did it.

So, you think they
fell for it, Nathan?

Violet, they don't have no idea.

I'm gonna lay so
much guilt on them,

they'll never sign
a petition again.

I'll have my job
back in no time.

Sock it to them, Nathan!

I never thought Bookman
would lose his job.

I just wanted to light
a little fire under him.

That's the same thing
they said to Joan of Arc,

and look what happened to her.

Oh, Willona, don't feel guilty.

It's not your fault.

Yes, it is.

The petition was my idea.

Yeah, but I drafted it.

I signed it.

We all signed it.

I didn't.

Willona, you shouldn't
regret the past.

I mean, guilt only
immobilizes you.

That's the same thing I say
to all the chicks I go out with.

But that's the only way
I can get 'em mobilized.

Oh, Mama, can't we do something
about Mr. Bookman's job?

I like him.

When we play hide-and-go-seek,

he's a good place
to hide behind.

And I can b*at him
in hopscotch too.

And he buys all
us kids ice cream

when the truck comes around.

Hey, Willona, do you
think Alderman Davis

could pull a few strings?

Ohh. Who's Alderman Davis?

Just look in the Yellow Pages
under crooked politicians.

Pass on Alderman Davis.

I already made one mistake,

I am not about to make another.

But we ought to be doing
something for Mr. Bookman.

Honey, we're thinking
about that now. That...

Oh, Bookman, my good man.

We were just saying
a few kind words

about the soon-to-be departed.

That's really nice of you, J.J.,

but what else can you expect

from such a warm-hearted
bunch of people.

Hey, right now, there's
somebody I want you to meet.

Hey, Stanley?

Folks this is Stanley
Sifford, my replacement.

Hi, sure is nice
to meet you folks.

Nathan here's been
showing me the ropes.

And you know that's strange,

'cause most guys would
have turned their back

on somebody
who's taking their job.

It's not your fault, Stanley.

It's not anybody's fault.

You see what I mean?

He is one of a kind.
Now, you know,

they broke the mold
when they made him.

I think I know why it broke.

Well, now that I'm here,

is there anything
that needs fixing?

The shower drips a little.

Well, I always say:

why put off until tomorrow
what you can easily do today.

That's funny.
Bookman always says:

why put off tomorrow
what you can put off forever.

Hey, look, Stanley,

I know it's your first day
at work and everything.

You don't wanna
tire yourself out.

Well, I'll just take a
look at the shower.

I always say:

an ounce of prevention
is worth a pound of cure.

Heh, heh, heh. We ain't never
had the prevention or the cure,

But we sure had the pounds.

Ah! Just remembered.

I got something to take care of.

Listen, I'll be back
later to say, um...

goodbye.

You know, J.J., it's
really gonna be strange

living in a building
where everything works.

Including the janitor.

Hey, hey, hey,
wait just one minute,

This just might work
out for the best after all.

You know, you're right, Willona.

We can't help it if Bookman
didn't cut the mustard.

We had no idea and
we had no intentions

of getting that man fired.

Right? Right.

But if he is
fired, c'est la vie.

C'est la guerre.

C'est si bon.

Mama, you mean we don't want
Mr. Bookman around anymore?

Honey, he'll find another job.

Yeah, but where do you put
a man who's lazy, mouths off

and never keeps his promises?

Send him to Washington.

Well, but best of all, we
don't have to see that jive,

Alderman Davis.

Yeah, you're right...
You know, he could...

Oh, you're back.

Violet and I decided to
make the final rounds together.

She's very upset.

This is her third
box of Kleenex.

Oh, Mrs. Bookman, how are you?

These are hard times.

I don't know what
Nathan's going to do.

Come on, now,

I told you to stop bothering
people with our troubles.

Violet, you promised.
No more crying.

I can't help it.

I'm not as strong as you are.

We've had rough times before.

I know, but never
as bad as this.

Yeah, I know. I know.

Keep her away from
the open window.

Charming J.J.

Sweet Thelma.

Darling Michael.

I'm sure you understand
what I'm going through.

I know how bad I felt
when your father lost his job.

I think it's time we
should be leaving, Violet.

Yes, I need some fresh air.

Wait a minute, Mrs. Bookman!

Take it easy.

The door is this
way, Mrs. Bookman.

The window's faster.

Take it easy, take it easy.

Miss Woods,

we'd like to ask
you one last favor.

Anything.

We'd like for you to have this.

Oh, I... I couldn't take that.

It's an antique.

It's been in Violet's
family for years.

Yes, handed down from
generation to generation.

Careful, Nathan, don't be
the generation that drops it.

I mean, this beautiful,
expensive clock,

that's something
you never let go of.

Knowing it's with you would
make us feel so much better.

Dearest friend,

I'd rather see it on your table,

than in the window
of some hock shop.

If I'm still here to see it.

Please?

Ok.

Let's go, Violet.

I'll have to watch her
like a hawk every minute.

Well, folks, your
shower's all fixed.

All it needed was
one little washer.

That's nice, Stanley. Thank you.

Oh, sure. And, Miss
Woods, if you don't mind,

I'll go over and see if I can
fix anything in your apartment.

Thanks a lot, Stanley.

We sure have a great
new janitor, don't we?

Yeah, I tell you, that
Stanley is something else.

You know, he really
gets the job done.

Yeah, Stanley's my man.

Maybe Stanley would buy
us double scoops of ice cream.

Oh, Stanley's a great guy.

I'm gonna miss Stanley.

Alderman Davis' office, please.

Well, hello there, Wilma.

Nice of you to drop by.

Usually it's me who
pays you the visit.

Somebody always winds
up paying when you stop by.

And the name is Willona.

It warms my heart

knowing my constituents
feel free to come to me

for consultation and advice.

I wish I could be
sure of the free.

Tell me, how are the Evans,
my favorite project family?

Oh, they're fine.

And, of course, how
are you too, Winnonie?

Could we just get down
to the business at hand,

why I came here, please.

I think I know why you're here.

It's about Bookman being fired.

That's right.

And you came to thank me.

Well, you needn't.

You see, it's all part of
being a faithful public servant.

Keeping in touch
with the people.

You put the touch on
the people, all right.

Your thanks isn't necessary.

You may, however,
show your gratitude

by making a generous
donation to my favorite charity.

The Alderman Fred C. Davis
Clinic for Un-neutered Cats.

Alderman, I didn't...

My secretary will accept
your check on the way out.

Good day, Wilhemina.

Willona. The name is Willona.

I didn't come here to thank you.

I came to see if you could
get Bookman's job back.

Get his job back? Yeah.

But you're the one
who started this petition.

I know, but we just wanted
him to shape up, not ship out!

Well, I was only acting
in your best interest.

After all, my people
deserve the very best.

Then how come we
got stuck with you?

I'm gonna let that
one slide, Wyomia.

I realize your comments
are an overstatement,

like your hips.

Well, it's better that
an understatement,

like your hair.

Well, what you're
asking me to do

is far more complicated
than you could ever imagine.

What's so complicated about
getting a man's job back?

You see,

the political bureaucracy
is very complex.

One must adhere to certain
channels and procedures.

Oh, channels and procedures.

I get it.

How much is it going to cost us?

Oh, now, if I
didn't know better,

I would think you were
suggesting a bribe.

Oh, ho, ho... How much?

I'll have you know,
the word "bribe"

is not in my vocabulary.

Not in your vocabulary.

Well, how about
political contribution?

That I've heard of.

But, now, if I'm going to
go out on a limb for you,

there's something
else I ask in return.

I never, never want to hear you
complain about Bookman again.

You got it.

And, as far as
your contribution,

I'm sure we can work out
some arrangement, Winekta.

Perhaps some little token of
your esteem for Mrs. Davis.

What kind of token, and
how much esteem, baldy?

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

One good thing
about Alderman Davis,

he can't be bought...
but he can be rented.

Ha ha ha. That's the
price we had to pay, honey.

Surprise! I'm back!

Good.

Now would you give us some heat?

Hey, Thelma, you should
know better than that.

You can't teach an
old buffalo new tricks.

Oh, by the way, I guess I
owe you some thank-you

for getting me my job back.

You mean, you know
about that, Bookman?

Yeah, and it's the
least you can do,

considering your petition
got me fired in the first place.

You knew about that too?

You betcha, little lady.

This whole thing was a hustle?

Yeah. Beautiful, wasn't it?

You lost me my job, and
I used you to get it back.

Ha ha ha!

You mean, little Mrs.
Bookman was in on it too?

Great little actress, isn't she?

Well, we ought
to be on the stage.

We're a regular Farrah
Fawcett, Lee Majors.

Yeah, Charlie's Devil
and Six Dollar Man.

And you fell for it.

Now give me my clock back.

Clock?

The man say he
want his clock back.

We thought it was a gift.

Loan, loan.

It was hard enough for me
to convince Mrs. Bookman

to let me use it in the plan.

Now hand it over.

Come here, Booga, listen.

You have to
understand the structure

of a political bureaucracy.

You see, there are certain
procedures and channels

one must adhere
to. And if you elect...

Hey wait a minute. Hold it.

I don't wanna
hear all that stuff.

Just give me the clock back.

Bookman, I don't think
you heard the lady.

You got to give a
little to get a little.

I don't think you understand.

Give me my tick-tock back.

Uh, what they're
trying to say, Bookman,

is that in order to
get your job back,

they had to bribe
Alderman Davis.

Oh, that's all behind us now.

I don't wanna know
about sordid details.

I think you'll want to know
about this detail, Mr. Bookman.

Don't tell me you
gave that man my clock.

We gave him your clock.

I asked you not to tell me that.

You know, you had no
right to give that clock away.

Neither did you.

But that's all behind
us now, remember?

Look, I can't go
home without it.

Bye-bye, Mr. Buffalo Butt.

Bye!

Violet will k*ll me.

We know.

♪ Just lookin' Out
of the window ♪

♪ Watchin' the asphalt grow ♪

♪ Thinkin' how It all
looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good times ♪
♪ Hey, yeah ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave When you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit Ripoffs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

Good Times was videotaped
in front of a studio audience.

♪ Good times ♪