02x26 - Big Time Superheroes

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Big Time Rush". Aired November 2009 - July 2013.*
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A look at life for the members of a boy band who are trying to make it big in the music industry.
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02x26 - Big Time Superheroes

Post by bunniefuu »

- ♪ So hop in your ride, roll your windows down ♪

♪ 'cause tonight's your night, get lost in the sound ♪

♪ got to crank the music loud

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

♪ blow your speakers out

- print it!

[All cheering] - yes!

- Btr's new album is complete.

[All cheering]

- with new songs.

Both: and a new attitude.

- And it's gonna send btr to new heights.

And nobody can stop us.

- And you swear you fully regret

imprisoning the band big time rush

while trying to sabotage their first concert performance?

- Absolutely.

From now on, I want to focus on my music, not theirs.

My days of calling in revenge are over.

- Then, mr. Hawk, your parole is...

Approved.

- ♪ Ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

- caw!

- ♪ Make it count, play it straight ♪

♪ don't look back, don't hesitate ♪

- ♪ when you go big time

- ♪ what you want, what you feel ♪

♪ never quit and make it real ♪

- ♪ when you roll big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ listen to your heart now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ don't you feel the rush

- ♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

- ♪ oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck

♪ with the life you choose

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got so you got to live it big time ♪

all: come on.

Come on.

[Computer chirps]

[all cheering]

- and now we make our ceremonial march

to our digital storage room and grab our big time hard drive

and get it to the cd-making place.

- Looking for this?

- Hawk!

What are you doing here?

- Why are you dressed like that?

- Oh, I'm crazy now.

And I'm stealing your hard drive to get my revenge.

- Give us that hard drive right now.

- No.

- This looks like a job for...

Him.

- No, it doesn't,

'cause there's six of us

and only one of you.

- Guess again.

Hawk-men!

You know, jail gives you lots of time

to design cool henchman costumes and plan cool escapes.

Caw!

[All coughing]

- he's gone!

- And so is our entire second album!

[Eerie gurgling]

- [screaming]

- okay, to the best of your ability,

describe what happened.

- I was doing the dishes.

I heard a strange noise coming from the sink.

I looked in the sink.

I saw it, I screamed, and I sent my daughter

to the park so it wouldn't get her.

- It's back.

- What's back? - Nothing.

Nothing's back.

We'll fill out this maintenance report,

take care of that little clog asap.

Bye.

- We have to shut that water off now,

or it'll spread like before.

- Why don't you shut your mouth before you cause a panic?

- Are you forgetting what happened last time?

- This is nothing like the last time.

[Rustling, clanking, and groaning]

[siren wailing]

[indistinct speech over police radio]

- right now, we can't positively identify anyone,

except that it's-- - hawk!

Arrest him! It's hawk!

- Except that it's someone disguised as a nut bag.

Now, we'll do a full investigation as soon as we can.

All: as soon as you can?

- We need to ship our album,

which is on that hard drive, today.

- Oh, really?

Well, in that case,

let me get our special

boy band task force on this asap.

- Oh, sweet. - Yes!

- He's being sarcastic.

- Mm-hmm, he is.

Besides, I have a lot

of other crimes I have to deal with today:

a naked mugger,

a pawn store holdup,

and three cats stuck in trees.

- We got a on curtis and vine.

- Make that four cats.

Get out there, brown.

Besides, why don't you just download your backup files?

You do have backup files, right?

- Control room! [All yelling]

- search "blow your speakers out,"

and the file should come up.

- [Shrieks]

he must have hacked in

and stolen all our song files.

- Wait, why is blow your speakers out

showing up on a web link?

- Who's "hot new artist zwagger"?

- And why can you preorder blow your speakers out

on his hot new album?

- [Gasps] and paralyzed and superstar

and all of our songs!

- What label is he on?

Hawk's recording our news songs

and is gonna release them before we do.

[All screaming]

- for the last time, I'm not shutting the water down.

- Okay, what's going on?

Because my mom won't tell me.

- Super-clog is back.

Look, I want you, your mom, and the boys

to get out of town for a few days.

I'm sorry. I have no time to explain.

- Super-what?

- Okay, I have a little bit of time.

About five years ago, a clog like I've never seen

almost destroyed the palmwoods.

It oozed out of sinks and splattered out of showers.

Residents moved out in droves.

This place was shut down for a year,

but the clog was never found.

And now it's back.

- A sink clog of grease and hair

almost destroyed the palmwoods?

- And I have to stop it

before it stops us.

- Super-clog.

Please.

[Eerie gurgling]

[groaning]

you're gonna need a bigger plunger.

- ♪ Got to crank the music loud ♪

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

♪ blow your speakers out

- now, that's what I call zwagger.

Only nine more songs to record,

and we've got your smash debut album,

and I've got revenge on big time rush.

- Um, did you just say, "revenge on big time rush"?

- What? No, no, no.

Why would I say that? I said--

uh--

caw!

- Oh, okay.

So what do we do?

- I think we should just call the police again.

- What, so they can tell us to wait a few days

while they save some cats?

- I think it's time...

For him.

- No, no, no. - No, no, no.

- The only way to defeat supervillains

is with superheroes.

- All we have to do is get into hawk records

and steal back our hard drive...

Normal burglar style.

- You do realize that breaking and entering

is against the law, right?

- May I remind you that in that studio

is the only copy of btr's second album?

Now, who's in?

- Give me the bolt cutters.

- Sledgehammer, please.

- Kelly,

keep the van ready and running.

And you...

Can wear one bandana.

- Let's get our songs back.

[All cheering]

[eerie gurgling]

- okay, plungie, it's all up to you.

- Are you sure you don't need a bigger plunger?

- Shh. You're psyching him out.

Now all we're missing is the element of surprise.

Surprise!

Aah! Ooh!

Stronger than before.

[Eerie gurgling]

[echoing belch]

plungie!

No!

- Bob.

It's too late.

- He was so young and full of suction.

- Focus.

What will it do next?

- Well, it knows I'm after it, so it'll probably retreat

into the pipes, waiting to strike again.

[Pipes rattling]

[screeching growl]

- [screaming]

- ah!

- Okay, everybody spread out,

and find that hard drive.

- Stop right there.

Let's try paralyzed one more time.

This time, a little more zwagger.

- Oh, no. They're already on song three.

- ♪ You, you walked into the room ♪

[music stops] - oh.

Hurry this up before we get caught.

Come on.

- Okay, we can't hurry up,

because we can't find the hard drive.

- That's because you're not thinking

like an evil producer.

And I do because I sort of am one.

Shbingo.

[All gasping]

- we got our songs back.

- Yes! - Whoo!

[Siren wailing] - whoa!

- There they are, commissioner.

They've broken into my studio,

and now they're stealing my property.

- He stole it from us first!

- I don't know what you're talking about,

but I do know that that is my hard drive.

- No, it's not. - You are a liar!

- No, you did. No. Not.

- Quiet!

There's a simple way to settle this.

Let's just see what's on the hard drive, shall we?

- Yeah!

And then you'll hear us singing,

and he'll go to jail.

- Dear hawk's video diary,

I am so happy today that I wrote a song.

It's called I love the police.

♪ Police are good, they guard our neighborhood ♪

♪ police are nice, I think they're cool as ice ♪

- oh, this is bad.

- This is so bad!

- ♪ Ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

[bluesy harmonica music]

- ♪ we got thrown in jail



♪ And I know--

- not helping!

- Everybody calm down!

We can figure this out.

- This was hawk's plan all along:

a super disguise so he couldn't get identified

and a fake hard drive

so we'd get busted and end up in here.

- But now...

We're breaking out of here.

- We really need to get him some help.

- It worked!

- Big time rush. - Wait.

- You made bail.

All: kelly!

- Yay!

Now, stay out of my way.

I am looking into your had drive robbery,

but this is the lapd, and we deal with a lot of crime.

Last year alone, we had a b--

- we have another at sunset and vine.

- Will someone please save the tree cat?

And I better not catch you anywhere near hawk records,

or next time, there will be no bail.

- Yes, sir, mr. Commissioner.

We will stay away from hawk records.

Okay, how do we get back into hawk records?

- Weren't you idiots just in jail?

[Evil laughter]

- ah, I can almost hear him laughing at us now.

[Evil laughter]

- wait!

- There are three things every supervillain must do:

laugh evilly,

seek revenge,

and show up on various screens unexpectedly.

- You'll never get away with this, hawk.

- Oh, but I am.

In fact, I've just put a little zwagger

on your song superstar,

which is going to turn him into a superstar.

- That's song six!

He's halfway there.

- Did you say, "his song superstar"?

- Okay, and what do you think of this

as a title for my new cd?

It's called caw!

- We will not let him get away with this.

- Yeah, well, we're not allowed to go to hawk records, either.

- Wow, I never thought I would say this...

James!

- We won't be there.

But he will.

- How does he do that?

- We're not sure.

- Okay, so bandana man is going to defeat hawk

and his hawk-men by himself?

- No.

The supertastic super- will.

- Who's the supertastic super- ?

- I'm looking at them.

- So you want us to disguise ourselves as superheroes,

pull a surprise raid at hawk records,

and take our hard drive back by force?

- Does anybody have a better idea?

I didn't think so.

[Eerie gurgling and groaning]

- okay, now I think it's in the lobby.

- Yeah, and getting bigger.

That's it!

Get out of the way!

- What are you doing?

- If bitters won't shut off the water,

then we will.

[Gurgling stops]

now it's trapped and can't move.

- What do you think you're doing?

- Saving your life.

- All that's happened today was, your mom got a little dirty,

and you lost your little plungie.

- [Gasps] little p--

don't turn that valve.

That's just what it wants.

- Don't tell me what to do.

[Pipes clanking]

[eerie gurgling]

[people screaming]

[eerie groaning]

[loud retching]

[woman screaming]

[people screaming]

there's no need to panic. Remain calm.

There's no need to panic.

Get rid of it.

Get rid of it!

- And I want in.

'Cause this thing is so going down.

- Okay.

This is everything we've got in the studio.

- I can't believe we're doing this.

- Supertastic super- , suit up!

- You said "super" twice.

- You bet I did.

- Okay. - Okay!

- ♪ Strobing lights, feel the rhythm, the rhythm ♪

♪ and it'll get you right

♪ sweat it all out of your system ♪

♪ you got to free your mind

♪ let yourself unwind

♪ 'cause it's your - ♪ night, night, night

- ♪ so get it - ♪ right, right, right

- ♪ so hop in your ride, roll your windows down ♪

♪ 'cause tonight's your night, get lost in the sound ♪

♪ got to crank the music loud

♪ oh, oh-oh, oh

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

♪ so hop in your ride, roll your windows down ♪

♪ 'cause tonight's your night, get lost in the sound ♪

♪ got to crank the music loud

♪ oh, oh-oh, oh

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

- ♪ I know you feel the heat

♪ I see you feeling the fire, don't worry about a thing ♪

♪ fulfill your every desire

♪ the dj's playing your song, so now you can't go wrong ♪

♪ 'cause it's your - ♪ night, night, night

- ♪ so do it - ♪ right, right, right

- ♪ come on

- ♪ can you feel it - ♪ inside?

- ♪ You'd like to go for - ♪ a ride

- ♪ I know you need it, I can see it in your eyes ♪

- ♪ so hop in your ride, roll your windows down ♪

♪ 'cause tonight's your night, get lost in the sound ♪

♪ got to crank the music loud

♪ oh, oh-oh, oh

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

♪ your speakers out

♪ so hop in your ride, roll your windows down ♪

♪ 'cause tonight's your night, get lost in the sound ♪

♪ got to crank the music loud

♪ oh, oh-oh, oh

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

♪ your speakers out

♪ whoa-oh, whoa-oh, whoa-oh

- ♪ let me hear you say

- ♪ whoa-oh, whoa-oh, whoa-oh

- ♪ this party's never over, no, no, no ♪

- ♪ whoa-oh, whoa-oh, whoa-oh

- ♪ let me hear you say

- ♪ whoa-oh, whoa-oh, whoa-oh

- ♪ whoa-oh, whoa-oh

- ♪ so hop in your ride, roll your windows down ♪

♪ 'cause tonight's your night, get lost in the sound ♪

♪ got to crank the music loud

♪ oh, oh-oh, oh

♪ baby, blow your speakers out

♪ your speakers out

- kelly, where's your costume?

- I didn't like anything in the pile.

- Well, you can't go like that.

You'll get recognized.

- Ugh, fine.

I'll be bowl-head.

Covers my face, and I don't look any dumber than you guys.

- Good point.

- Supertastic super- ,

to the skies!

- Ha-ha!

[All thumping]

[all grunting]

- you can't fly.

- Oh. - Oh, right.

- To the van! All: the van!

[Eerie gurgling]

- all right, we all know the plan.

- We power plunge the three main points of entry.

- Creating a turbo stream of water

that forces super-clog up through the pipes.

- And its only escape

is the ventilation shaft in the roof,

where it will sh**t out and meet its sun-dried demise.

[Eerie gurgling]

- power up!

- Split up!

- Hello, super-clog, I'm katie, and you're evicted.

[Motor whirring]

[eerie gurgling]

- you're all overreacting!

It's just a little clog.

[Eerie gurgling]

- all right, super-clog, you are going down.

I mean up!

[Motor whirring]

- this is for plungie!

Yah-ha! [Laughing]

[eerie groaning]

[laughing]

[eerie groaning]

[spluttering expl*si*n]

- [screaming]

[loud splat]

all: oh!

[Cheers and applause]

- we can all use the bathrooms again!

- Yeah.

- I can wash dishes again!

Wait.

- Sadly, this victory is bittersweet,

as I have lost my best friend.

Plungie!

Plungie, oh.

- Well, this story is wrapping up quite nicely.

- No, it's not.

- Yes!

All songs are complete.

Now to upload your album to the web and get my revenge.

- Think again, hawk.

- Who are they?

- We are the supertastic super- .

- You said "super" twice.

All: you bet he did.

- And we want our songs back now.

- Yeah. Not gonna happen.

Caw!

- Ba-ha-ha-ha!

- [Grunting]

oh!

- Slapshot!

- Time to get the hawk out of here.

- Yeah, I got bowl powers now.

[All yelling]

[siren wailing]

all: whoa!

- Do you see this?

Can you believe what I'm seeing?

I thought I told you guys to stay away from hawk records.

- Commissioner, they broke in and att*cked me.

- [Gasps] - [gasps]

- I think you know what to do.

- Yes...

Arrest him for stealing big time rush's second album.

- Wh-what?

No, you can't prove anything.

- We checked local costume shops to see

who bought a hawk costume, and we found this receipt.

- Well, that could be any hawk!

- And we found your comment card,

where under reason for purchase, you checked "revenge."

- Who cares?

You'll never find your precious hard drive.

- You mean this one?

He's been talking to it all day,

saying, "revenge is mine," and freaking me out!

- You traitor!

I'll get you, big time rush.

I'll be back. Caw-caw!

Caw-caw!

[All cheering]

- hey!

I thought I told you guys I would handle this.

All: are we in trouble?

- No.

In fact, I could use

an action squad like you

that I can call when disaster strikes this fine city

and it's too much for me to handle.

- Well, commissioner, I think I speak

for the entire supertastic super-

when I say we're willing and ready to serve.

[Cat meowing]

- here, kitty, kitty.

[Cat meowing] - come on, kitty.

- Oh, let me just throw the bowl at him.

- No! - No!

- Just grab the branch! - I'm doing the best I can.

- ♪ Step it up, get in gear ♪

♪ go for broke, make it clear ♪

- ♪ got to go big time

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ make it work, get it right ♪

♪ change the world overnight

- ♪ got to dream big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ give it all you got now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ isn't it a rush

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck with the life you choose ♪

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got so you got to live it big time ♪
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