12x16 - Handemonium/Breakin

[bunniefuu]

- Are you ready, kids?

all: Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

all: Aye, aye, Captain!

- ♪ Ohh... ♪

♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- ♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- ♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- ♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪

all: SpongeBob SquarePants! - Ready?

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

- SpongeBob

SquarePants!

[laughing]

♪ ♪

[waves crashing]

[klank, klunk]

- [panting]

- Welcome, everyone,

to the Secret Anchor Arm Wrestling Club.

- Oh, yeah!

[cheering]

- [grunts]

- [groaning]

- Give it up, old man.

You're nothing but a soft shell, Krabs.

- [grunting]

- [yelps]

- [grunts] [cheers and applause]

- Yeah!

- I win! Again.

[laughing]

That's me penny pinching hand.

[laughing]

[cheering]

both: Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup.

- This old soft shell is ready to twist another wrist.

Who's next?

- Oh. - [laughing]

- I am!

all: Huh?

- Huh?

[all murmuring]

- You got a problem with that, Eugene?

[laughing] His name's Eugene, by the way.

- [laughing] I got no problem with that,

Shel-don.

His name's Sheldon, by the way.

[both grunt]

[cheers and applause]

[bell chimes]

- [groaning]

- It's humiliation time, Krab-cake.

I've been working out for months to bring you down.

[growling]

- [groaning]

What's...goin' on here?

I can't...hold it! - Any last words?

- Just...one.

Sucker!

[laughter]

- Yeah!

- Next!

- [groaning]

- Next!

- I'll get--

- Next! - You--

- Next! - Krabs.

- [laughing]

I'm the champion,

hands down.

[cheers and applause]

- I'll get you for this, Krabs.

You'll rue the day you--

Aah!

- Yeah!

- [groaning]

[whimpering]

Oh, why do I try to compete with Krabs?

He always goes long and I always fall short.

Will I ever get the upper hand?

Huh?

[clam cawing]

That's it!

My glove!

My big, beautiful, bone-crushing glove!

Thank you, clam. - [caw]

[dramatic music]

[laughs]

[thunder crashing]

[yelps]

♪ ♪

- [growling]

- The pinky is wiggling!

Wiggling!

[laughs menacingly]

- [grunting]

- Let's see Krabs throw down this gauntlet.

[laughing]

Hiyah! - [groaning]

[neighing]

- Ohh...

- Ohh...

- [yawns]

- Ohh...

- I want a rematch, Krabs.

- Bor-ing.

But, whatevs.

- [gasps] Oh, no,

not a hand cramp. Not now!

Luckily, I have a last-minute substitution standing by.

[whistle blows]

[thudding steps]

[all gasp]

- Ow!

[thudding]

- Ooh--

- [moaning]

[bell chimes]

- [grunting]

[groaning]

[shouting]

Any...last...words?

- [laughing]

[whistle blows]

- [groaning] Wha--

- Just one.

Sucker!

[laughing]

- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait now--

Aah--

Huh? No, no, no, no-no-no-no!

- Ta-da!

Let's give a big hand to the new champion.

[whistle blows]

Okay, move it, filthy fingers.

Hiyah! - [gasps, whimpers]

- Aw, too bad Krabs isn't here to catch me

with my glove in the cookie jar.

[laughing] Bust the doors!

[whip slaps] - [neighing]

- Bust this one, too!

- [growls]

[growling]

- And now, for the secret formula.

Open says me!

[whip snaps] - [groaning]

[growling]

[whip snaps]

- Don't hand me that.

I command you!

Please don't hurt me!

Whew.

- [growls]

[sizzles]

- [yelps]

[yelling] Hot! Hot sauce!

Aah! [gibbering]

[groans]

- Look out! - Huh?

- Oh!

[glove growling]

- Uh-oh. That glove is gonna destroy

Bikini Bottom, and I'm gonna get blamed for it.

[gasps] I hate prison food!

But I can't stop that monster all by myself.

This is an emergency!

[yelps]

"Emergency Box."

That's convenient.

- [laughs] Morning.

What is your emergency, sir?

Oh, hi, Plankton.

- I need a hand with something, kid.

Hop to it. - Don't worry, sir.

No matter what the emergency, I've seen it all before.

- [yells]

- I've never seen that before!

- Usually it's sitting quietly on top of the Chum Bucket.

- Well maybe we can talk to it. - Talk is cheap.

I just need you to push this button when I say so.

Hey, fist-face!

Prepare for annihilation.

Push the button, SpongeBob.

[laughing] Huh?

- [sobbing] I can't do it.

I can't sh**t the glove. It's wiggling.

[all shouting]

- [whimpering] - I said, push it!

[groaning]

[rapid beeping]

[laughing] What?

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- [screeches]

- [panting] Why are you here, again?

- I'm helping.

[laughs]

Listen to me, Plankton.

You can't fight a big monster like that with hate.

You can only defeat them with love.

- Blaaaghhh!

Love?

Yikes.

That's too brutal.

Let's do it!

- Ooh, we're in disguise. [giggles]

- Pipe down, SpongeBob, or you'll blow our glover!

I mean cover!

- [feminine giggle]

- [growling]

- [giggles] - Ooh.

[sniffs]

Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo.

- [giggling]

- [grunting] - [giggling]

- It's working, SpongeBob. He's in love.

[laughs] The big dope.

- [giggles] Love.

Ooh! Ha. Mm!

- [chuckling]

- Oh. - [humming]

[whimpers]

[slurping]

[gasps]

- Check, please.

- [growls] - [shouts]

[panting]

- [moaning]

- I'm sorry, Plankton. You came to me for help

and I failed. [sobbing]

[coughs] It's all right, kid.

Keep your pants on.

- Huh? Keep my pants on?

Keep my pants on! That's a great idea.

- Are you insane? I said keep them on!

- Don't worry, you'll see. [clears throat]

♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪

- You do. - Yeah!

- [shouts]

- Thanks for the pants, Hans,

but could you help me with another problem?

- I'm always here to help you, SpongeBob.

High five.

- High five!

- Ouch!

I get it. To catch a huge glove,

you need a huge hand.

- Oh, yeah.

- You're a genius, SquarePants!

- That old glove could be anywhere by now.

How are we gonna find him?

- Hmm, let's see. If I was a glove,

where would I go?

- Ooh, ooh, I know!

[upbeat music]

- Daddy, I want it.

- Now, Timmy, you already have one of those

glove toys at home.

- Not this one. That one!

- [shouts]

[all yelling]

- Uh-oh. - [growls]

[all yelling]

- Hey, Glove-zilla!

Someone needs to teach you some Swedish manners.

- [whimpers]

[yelling]

both: Sic 'em, Hans!

- [barking]

- [yelling]

- I challenge you to a duel.

- [growling]

- Give him the old five finger discount, Hans!

- But only love with defeat the glove.

[both grunting]

Oh, look, they're playing rock, paper, scissors!

One, two, three...

- Yeah! Nothing beats scissors.

- Oh, except rock.

[both whimper]

[both grunting]

Oh, my goodness. It's a thumb w*r.

[exciting music]

♪ ♪

[both shouting]

[all shouting]

[intense music]

♪ ♪

- I can't b*at the glove, SpongeBob.

It's too strong. You need to create a diversion.

- Diversion, eh? Hmm...

- Hmm...

- Hmm...

- Hmm... Oh!

Aha!

No. Hmm...

Hmm...

- Hmm...

- We need a bullhorn, stat.

- I am a bullhorn, stat!

- Hey, finger face.

Your grandma was a combat boot.

[laughing]

- [grunts]

- [whimpers]

- [growling]

[giggling]

- I've got him! How do I look?

- Aw, they fit each other just like a glove.

[laughs]

- [laughs] Hardy-har-har.

- He's harmless now, SpongeBob.

See you tomorrow morning. I'll bring the pants.

- [laughing]

What? Hey!

Come back. That glove is irreplaceable.

Or is it?

[grunts]

That looks way better than a glove.

And it's a combat boot,to boot.

[humming]

Ouch!

- Yeah!

- [humming]

- SpongeBob! Spatula down, sailor.

- What's going on, Mr. Krabs?

- According to the nice man from the Labor Authority,

it's time for your break, boy-o.

- We get breaks?

- Krabs!

- [chuckles] Well, of course you do, boy-o.

Why, if I don't give you a five-minute break

once every years,

this lovely man could fine me big bucks.

- Nice meeting you.

- And you don't want me to get fined, do you?

- [gasps] No!

Never.

- Good. Then you just sit here

and don't do or say nothing for five minutes.

Oh--

and enjoy your break. [laughs]

- Okay.

[whistling]

♪ ♪

[gasps]

Oh!

[dramatic music]

- SpongeBob! What are you doing?

- Uh, I just spotted a spot.

- You can't work on your break, boy-o.

Period. Remember the fines?

- I knew it!

I've had my eye on you for years, Krabs.

Oh, this violation

is really gonna cost you.

Hmm...

- [yelps] Oh, I can see we're gonna

have to take drastic measures here.

[grunting]

[sighs]

- "Employee break room"?

I never knew this was here.

[creatures chittering]

- [whistling]

[gasps] Oh, it's beautiful.

Like stepping through a portal into the magical realm beyond.

- Yeah, whatever. Five minutes.

- I just hope there's enough time to enjoy everything.

Ooh!

[humming]

Ooh.

[laughs]

Enjoy your carousel, my little hot dog friends.

[laughs]

Surf's up!

Wipe out.

[bright music]

♪ ♪

[gulping]

I think this used to be...

creamed corn!

- Sorry, bub.

I was meatloaf before I expired.

[laughs] - Oh, Globby, you're so silly.

[laughing]

[music warping]

Bah bah!

My break room band.

Scrubby and the Cleaning Crew.

Hmm...

Let's see if I wired everything right.

Perfect.

[upbeat music]

Yeah!

♪ ♪

- Huh? Ooh, music.

I didn't know the Krusty Krab had a lounge.

Ooh!

♪ ♪

- Shake a leg.

- Oh, come on in, everyone.

Try the funk, it's fresh.

[all cheering]

- I sure dig that. There we go, yes.

- [humming] Huh?

Where'd all me paying customers go?

[music thumping]

What--ow. What the--

[all cheering]

A party? I don't remember charging

anyone for a party on me premises.

[all cheering]

- Oh yeah!

- All right, that's it. Five minutes are up, SpongeBob.

Break's over, everyone out.

Everyone out. Out, out, out, out, out.

- You're in compliance this time, Krabs.

After a break at my house!

[all cheering]

- Oh, Mr. Krabs, that was so much fun.

I can't wait for my next break in years.

- [grunting]

Well, I'm glad you enjoyed it, boy-o,

'cause it's time you got back to making me money.

- Yes, sir, Mr. Krabs. - [laughing]

- Huh, wonder where Squidward got to.

Oh, well. [whistling]

- [sighs]

Hey, bub, have you seen my lid anywhere?

[yells] - Sorry,

I'm on my break.