05x09 - It’s a Vibe

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Grown-ish". Aired: January 3, 2018 - present.*
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Zoey heads off to college and begins her hilarious journey to adulthood.
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05x09 - It’s a Vibe

Post by bunniefuu »

Junior: This is it,

one of the proudest moments of my life,

crossing into the Gamma fraternity.

But getting here
was no walk in the park.


They tested our commitment.

They tested our resolve.

- All done.
- Uh, yeah.

The brothers requested you wash
these drawers by hand.

- No Name.
- Yeah?

♪ Voice on every track, I can be... ♪

Got a callus with your name on it.

And sometimes it felt like they tested

how much they could [bleep] with us.

[Groans]

♪ This is what it means... ♪

[Laughter]

Ugh...

It has been a ride.

But you earned your five stars,

so your Gamma name is The General.

- Ooh!
- Ohh!

This was one of the hardest
journeys of my life,


but I can honestly say...

it was all worth it.

Gammas: ♪ Mama, mama, don't you know ♪

♪ I'll be a Gamma till I'm old ♪

♪ I'll be a Gamma till I'm old ♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

Gammas!

[Cheers and applause]

Move!

Gammas: Move!

Move!

Hunh!

[Cheers and applause]

Introducing line

of Gamma Psi Delta!

Gammas: Hah!

[Cheers and applause]

[Chanting] G Psi D!

G Psi D!

G Psi D!

Whoo! G Psi D!

G Psi D!

[Cheers and applause]

Congratulations on crossing the line.

- Gamma looks good on you.
- Thank you.

It was a lot of work, but... [Gasps]

♪♪

[Laughing]

Wow! I'm so glad I didn't peak
in high school.

♪ Watch out, world, I'm grown now ♪

♪ I'm grown ♪

♪ Learn something new every day ♪

♪ I don't know, so I'mma feel my way ♪

♪ Got the weight of the world on me ♪

♪ But no regrets, this is what I say ♪

♪ Watch out, world, I'm grown now ♪

♪ I'm grown ♪
♪ You can tell me ♪

♪ My heart b*ating so loud ♪

♪ Mama, look, I'm grown now ♪

♪♪

Your boy has done the impossible.

I escaped the friend zone...
[Smooches]...

While simultaneously pledging a frat,

all while crushing my cla...

Okay, uh, passing my classes,
but, still,

no one has ever ended a semester
on a higher note.

I'm sorry. Zoey who?

Hey, babe.

Hey. Aww!

Ugh! I'm literally sick
of you guys already.

What up, General?

At ease, Frat.

You know what? I'm sick of everybody.

Well, you aren't gonna be
sick of me after this.

You're welcome.

- What for?
- Vibe Fest?

Doug's throwing a dope day party.

He's been planning it for weeks.

Ugh! Why does my ex always
throw the best parties?

- Enh.
- Thanks, Junior.

That sounds like fun!
I promise not to get sloppy.

Good luck with that.

Alright, guys, I'm gonna head out.

By the way, you and I are
definitely going together.

Ew.

Did y'all hear that?
"Definitely together."

♪♪

Yo, Doug, I need you
to come over here, man.

I think I saw a big-ass spider

right under, uh,
the napkin holder there.

Bro, I'm a bar back,
not pest control, alright?

Listen. Don't shame me for
my arachnophobia! I'm scared!

Bro, if I go over there and this spider

is not the size of a ferret,
I'm gonna go crazy, man.

It's right under... Look... Careful!

It might... It's a jumping one.

Bro, I don't see a spider...

Oh, no. It's over here now. Look, look.

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Look at your face!

[Cheering]

What up, what up?

[All talking]

♪♪

What's up, what's up?

Hi! Look at your cute outfit!

This is crazy.
What are you guys doing here?

Everyone wanted to come
support you and Vibe Fest.

That's some real fam sh*t, man.

Of course. We got you, bestie.

Aaron: You use that word very loosely.

You call him bestie,
you call me... I just...

Ana: Ohh. Make a decision, you know?

I would have thought
it would take, like,

Luna's bat mitzvah to actually
have us all be together.

[Chuckles] Or most of us.

Yeah, no, Jazz and Sky
send their regrets.

They're, like, in Italy
or Stockholm or...

- I don't know. Who knows?
- Yeah.

Oh, and let me guess, Luca's
on a Peruvian Ayahuasca retreat?

- Aaron: Sounds about right.
- Probably.

No, no, no. You guys, who do you think

is helping watch Luna this weekend?

I can't... I can't leave

Phil alone to watch the kid. That's...

Well, I'm just happy
you guys are here, man.

Aaron: And Zoey
will get in here tomorrow.

You know she likes
to be fashionably late, so...

Okay, so we're Cal U's
hottest couple for one more day.

Vivek, stop.

Okay. Where is the tequila? Is it...

- Behind the bar, yes.
- Thank you.

Nomi, i-it's : a. m.

Mama's baby-free this weekend,

so I should've had a drink,
like, minutes ago.

Hey, now.

She's not wrong. We're on vacation.

Hey, d-do the Crips know
that you stole their onesie?

What? It's okay.

We'll talk about it later. Just...

Lauryn: Oh, my God!

I just saw you and Annika
are IG official!

[Ding!]

Ah. We do look pretty cute
together, huh?

I mean, it doesn't even
look like she used a filter.

Mm.

[Sighs] You're so lucky.

You've found your forever person.

- Forever person?
- Mm-hmm.

Forever-ever?

Look. Don't listen to her.

I mean, we are Gamma men now.

This should be the time of our lives.

What's the point of
having the time of your life

if you don't have anyone
to share it with?

All I'm saying is that you
shouldn't retire from the game

when you just got drafted.

I mean, you get haircuts every Friday.

Obviously, you belong to the streets.

[Cellphone dings]

Which are calling my name
right now. See ya.

♪♪

[Sighs] He's an idiot.

He is.

Is he?

I can't believe you're
putting on a festival.

- Like, a festival?! That's huge.
- It is, man.

It's like Coachella
meets Camp Flog Gnaw,

but in giant tents I could
afford to rent in a hurry.

I'm really putting myself
out there, you know?

This is big for me, guys.

You know, I just want it
to be a success, you know?

Vivek: Well, we got you,
brother, alright? We know it will be.

Sorry, guys. It's just burgers.
I was gonna do filet mignon,

but I don't know how to filet a mignon.

- Another toast.
- Okay.

- Aww. Thank you, bro.
- To me and Ana.

- Right.
- Mm-hmm.

Going long and strong,
just like my sex game.

- Vi-vek!
- Cheers.

Sorry. It's really weird
to see you guys as, like...

- "Ana and Vivek."
- Word.

So how are the lovebirds doing?

- Mm.
- We're doing great.

Awesome.

Alright, guys. Cheers to Vibe Fest.

Ohh! Cheers!

- Cheers!
- Cheers!

- Vibe Fest!
- Yeah!

♪ Ohh, unh ♪

♪♪

♪ Ohh ♪

♪ I'm just with the crew ♪

♪ We ain't out here looking for boos ♪

♪ 'Cause some nights
be better with you ♪

♪ No baby mamas, keepin' it cute ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh,
that's just what I do, do, do ♪

♪ And that's just how we do it,
that's just how we do it ♪

♪ And you can do it, too,
ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ That's just how we do it,
ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

- sh*ts, sh*ts, sh*ts!
- sh*ts, sh*ts, sh*ts!

♪♪

- Cheers!
- Cheers!

Whoo!

Mmm.

Alright. Cool.
You guys already got drinks.

Yo, the bar line's
already out of control,

and I did not get enough water, y'all.

Dude, it's okay. Breathe, alright?

We're all having a great time, right?

- Yeah.
- Yeah. It's great.

Ana: Yeah!

♪ Like this, drip on a waterfall ♪

Yo, where's Zoey?

She just sent me a text that
she couldn't make it. I know.

- Sorry, man.
- Thanks.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can't wait to see her either.

Um, guys, I'm gonna go check out
if Cirque du Soleil over there

is as flexible as she seems, so...

- Fingers crossed.
- Alright, then.

sh*t, the last time
I saw that look on her,

she ended up pregnant.

♪♪

Okay, okay, everybody!

Please make some noise
for our beautiful dancers!

[Cheers and applause]

Incredible, incredible.

And if you're feeling lit tonight,

if you're having a good time
at the Vibe Fest,

make some n-o-o-oise!

[Cheers and applause]

Because right now we are entering

into peak vibes, everybody, yes.

Peak vibes! Peak vibes!

Everybody give it up
for my best, best friend.

- Yeah!
- Let's go, Doug!

There is a special lady in here
who means the world to me.

Ana, from the moment we met,

I knew that I would slowly wear ya down.

What?

So what I'm saying is, Ana...

will you make me the happiest
man on Earth by marrying me?

[Crowd awws]

♪♪

[Chuckles] Um...

♪♪

I'm sorry.

♪♪

Ana.

♪♪

Pbht. This is bad, man. This is...

I think this is worse
than when he got arrested.

This is definitely worse than the time
he got kicked out of school.

But it's better than when he got
disowned right before his dad d*ed.

- True. That's true.
- Whoa.

How many times has this guy been
kicked when he's already down?

- A lot.
- A lot.

Just too many times.

Man: This is your driver.
I'm by the blue tent.


The or...

[Beep] The orange tent.

The orange one? ¿Naranja?

Ana!

[Beep]

Are we consciously uncoupling?

Look.

I grew up watching rom-coms,
and, you know,

I always wanted to be a-a Julia Roberts

or... or a Meg Ryan.

But then I realized that those
movies weren't written for me

and I have to write my own story,

and that means
not getting married at .

I just thought proposing
was the next logical thing

when you're with the right person.

Vivek! Of course you're my person.

You're my emergency contact
at my hot yoga studio.

[Laughs]

I just wanted to show you
that I'm serious.

I love you,

and I love that you're serious about us.

But I have to be serious about me.

I'm just... I'm not... I'm not ready.

So what does that mean for us?

I don't know.

♪♪

♪♪

[Liquid bubbling]

♪♪

♪ I'm the top dog, I'm the guru ♪

♪ I'm the king like Shaka Zulu ♪

♪ b*at got me dancing... ♪

You know when you see a UFC
knockout, but your jaw hurts?

Ana's rejection kinda felt like that.

Ugh. Do not ever
propose to me in public.

[Coughs] Hold up. Propose?

Like, marriage?

This is moving quicker
than J. Lo after a breakup.

I don't know. I wouldn't mind
a public proposal.

Ugh! Yazmine is pro-marriage.

Who even is into marriage anymore?

- Bitch...
- What? No. It's just...

if we keep our bank accounts separate,

I wouldn't mind jumping the broom.

No. Marriage is a heteronormative

and oppressive institution.

I just don't think
there's any greater bond

than the one you make with your partner

in front of God and your family.

Ugh. You are like a walking red state.

Yeah, she was totally
conceived in missionary.

I'm sorry. [Laughter]

Look, I'm gonna play the field, retire,

get my real-estate license,

and then settle down with a hot divorcée

who knows what she wants.

How romantic.

I don't know. That sounds
like a solid plan to me.

My parents, they got married young,

but I feel like these days,
the best marriages happen

when you've lived a little more life.

Are you advocating a ho phase?

More like a ho era.

♪ Yeah ♪

♪♪

Excuse me.

I don't know why people keep
saying we don't have water.

Excuse me. Can I refill you?

We have water, everybody!
Vibe Fest has water!

Jazz: Hey.

♪♪

You missed a cup.

Jazz?

- What are you doing here?
- Hey, you.

I didn't think you were gonna make it.

[Giggles]

You're late to the party.

I didn't come here for the party.

I came here for you.

♪♪

I don't know what Aaron told you, but...

Nobody needed to tell me anything.

Between all the late-night sad posts

and the frantic group texts,
it's giving desperate.

Okay, yes, that was
a little manic of me,

but I promise you,
everything's good. I'm fine.

Come on, Doug. It's me.
What's really good?

Okay, you think you can just go ahead

and do your three months of therapy

and you can psychoanalyze me?

What, are you gonna tell me
about my daddy issues next?

Oh, actually,
it's full-blown mommy issues.

[Chuckles]

No, but, seriously, Douglas.

It's you and me.
We never lie to each other.

Tell me what's up.

[Inhales deeply]

What do you want me to tell you?
That I'm a failure?

That I-I lost my job, got an eviction,

and now I'm sleeping on an air mattress?

And this is my last chance
to make a name for myself?

This Vibe Fest is turning
into the Black Fyre Fest.

Someone offered to give neck
for a bottle of water.

[Chuckles]

Every time I try to chase my dreams,

I end up at square one.

Wait, so you really thought
after graduating college

everything would just fall into place?

Look, Jazz. I had a plan...

Do you remember what my plan was?

It was track. And it didn't work out.

Do you think I'm a failure?

- No, but it just wasn't right for you.
- Exactly.

So why don't you give yourself a break?

Alright. Don't laugh
when I say this, okay?

Okay.

I'm scared.

[Scoffs] No sh*t, Douglas.

We're all scared.

None of us have it all together,
and if someone says

that they do, they're straight-up lying.

Okay, I-I just feel like
this whole adulting thing,

it... it would be easier
if I didn't have to do it alone.

But you're not alone.

All of us have your back.

And if you ever need me,
I'm just a text away.

Well, it's good to see you.

It's good to see you, too.

How long you in town?

Mm, like, a couple days?

And then what's after that?

Honestly... I don't know.

And I'm okay with that.

- Fire.
- Yeah.

Would you like to dance?

[Laughing] Okay. Come on. Let's do it.

Mmm. Mmm.

What are you doing in here?

[Sighs] Watching a montage
of our entire relationship.

Those photos are from yesterday.

Yeah.

We were so young then.

[Chuckles]

I know I said no to an engagement.

♪♪

- Ana, what are you doing?
- Don't mess up the moment.

So, when, uh, we first met,

I genuinely hoped

you'd get arrested for
slinging all those dr*gs.

[Both laugh]

But then something changed.

And I fell in love with you.

And now I can't imagine spending
another day without you.

You're my best friend.

Wh... Is this really happening?

So let me ask you.

- Will you...
- Yes!

...move in with me?

♪♪

I'm in.

♪♪

Ohh.

[Both laugh]

♪♪

♪ We came to party, we came to party ♪

♪ We ain't come in here to hurt nobody ♪

♪ It's go time,
yeah, it's go time, yeah ♪

[Message bloops]

♪ We came to party, we came to party ♪

♪ We ain't come in here to hurt nobody ♪

♪ It's go time, yeah, it's go time ♪

What up, man?

What's up?

You know the miracle of air travel

is that I could get from here
to New York in five hours?

And this phone in my hand
means that I can

FaceTime Zoey at any point in the day?

Yet I still end up
sleeping alone at night.

I know, man.

I tried to do long-distance
with my ex, Olivia.

It is hard.

Relationships are hard.

So is timing.

Annika's always been my day one,

and now that things are finally popping,

I just don't wanna end up like Vivek.

Well, listen, man,
you can't overthink it.

You gotta focus on how you feel.

Honestly, I just feel like
now that I'm a Gamma,

there's a lot more of life
for me to experience.

Like... her...

and her over there.

[Both chuckle]

Well, relationships are always
gonna be a lot of work,

but I wouldn't trade mine for anything.

[Cellphone rings]

I'm gonna take this.

[Cellphone unlocks] Hey, babe!

Yeah, no. I miss you.

♪ We, we just came to party
and have a good time ♪

♪♪

Uh, so, now that
we're moving in together...

...is it safe to talk
about getting a dog?

- Too soon.
- Really?

- That was fun.
- You've got my number, right?

Yes. I'll call you.

Vivek: Uh, Phil's in
for a rude awakening.

Um... Nomi? What was that?

Yeah, are you okay?
Do you need me to lie to Phil?

Hoes before bros.

You guys, I'm great!

But what about Phil? Is he great?

Yeah, he's great.

He's great. I mean, I'm great.
We're... We're all great.

Yeah, no, we're... we're
in an open relationship.

Yeah, no, I didn't tell you.

Yeah, so I do me, Phil does him.

You know, sometimes we, like,
do other people, and... Yeah.

We felt like
the best relationship for us

is one with some freedom in it,
so that's what we're doing.

Huh. That's... cool. Very progressive.

Very progressive.

Thanks. Just think about it.

We're not a progressive couple.

We could think about it.

♪♪

- Hey! There you are.
- Junior: Hey.

I feel like I haven't seen you all day.

Yeah. Just a lot going on.

- Let's get out of here.
- Yeah.

Unh. I'm drunk. I need
to be in my bed, alone.

We'll get you there.

That was so embarrassing.

It was. I could not
take my eyes off them.

I hope that when
I finally get proposed to,

it's nowhere near belly dancers.

Yeah, my sister's friends are
very weird and very messy, so...

I'll see you tomorrow? Is that cool?

Wait. Um, do you want
to come chill in my room?

Um...

To be honest, my head's just kind of

all over the place right now.

Well, we can just meet later tonight.

[Exhales sharply]

What?

I feel like I might have
just jumped into us too soon.

Too soon? Wait. Am I missing something?

I thought this is what you wanted.

It was. It definitely was.

I just...

Maybe we should keep
being friends. For now.

Friends.

Yeah, that's... That's cool.

- Friends. Yeah. Okay.
- Cool.

Uh, so you want to watch
this finale episode of

"Blind, Drunk Love"?

Mnh. N-No, I'm good.
I'm real good. Thanks.

♪♪

She's good.

I'm good.

We're good. [Chuckles]

So why doesn't this feel good?

♪♪

The Vibe Fest was actually fire.

- Yeah.
- It really was.

people passed out from dehydration.

Wait. Huh? I thought they were napping.

- Nah.
- You guys, we did it! Unh!

- What?
- We are moving in together.

Yep.

- Oh, congrats!
- Whoo-wee

I put a ring on it.

- Ohh.
- Very progressive.

Very progressive, yes.

At least someone caught a vibe tonight.

- Mnh.
- Guys?

- What up?
- I am thirsty as hell.

- Ana: I am so thirsty!
- Vivek: Same! Same!

- Yeah?
- Let's b*at it. Come on.

[Fingers snap] Yeah, the vibe's gone.

- Let's go!
- Wait. Five more minutes.

- Five more minutes.
- We're out of here.

- I know, but I...
- Why when I get comfy, we gotta move?

- Thank you, Vibe Fest!
- Ow!
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