01x16 - A Tale for the Ages

[bunniefuu]

[KOKUYO]
Everyone!

As of now, this man
known as Senku

is pronounced the new
chief of Ishigami Village!

[VILLAGERS cheering]

[SENKU]
Ishigami Village?

[RURI]
That's right Senku.

I know of you. I have
for a long, long time.

Since I was a child.

Your full name...
is Ishigami Senku.

[SENKU]
Thanks.

Everything is finally starting
to make sense to me.

If every last living
person on the planet

was turned into stone,

then who could've even founded
this village in the first place?

Also, why do you, Kohaku,

and some of the others clearly
have foreign blood in you?

Now, all thanks to you, those
mysteries have been solved.

[BOTH gasp]

Sorry, but no?

I don't see how any mysteries
have been solved.

Yeah, and I don't get how
Senku happens to have

the same name
as the village.

Plus, Ruri, you somehow
knew about Senku?

[SENKU chuckles]

I'll bet that I probably come up

in your priestess
mythology, don't I?

You do.

When you say "mythology,"

do you mean like Momotaro
and the gorilla?

[SENKU]
Yeah.

No wonder you guys
know about folk tales

and giant animals you would
never have seen before.

Yeah. Ruri taught us
about lots of stuff.

The priestess passes
down knowledge

to the next generation
through stories

known as the Hundred Tales.

[RURI'S MOTHER]
Ruri.

This last story, the Hundredth
Tale, is very important.

And this one is true.

It happened a long,
long time ago.

[RURI]
The story my mother told me

is one of great strength,
and an indomitable spirit.

The Hundredth Tale.

I'll tell it now.

[RURI]
Its title is...

[RURI]
..."Ishigami Senku."

Why in the heck do you keep
following me, Moon? What gives?

[SENKU whistling]

[SENKU]
Even if I juke it hard,

it follows me ten billion
percent of the time.

[SENKU growls]

[RURI, BYAKUYA] Ever since he
was very young, this boy, Senku,

was fascinated by
the world's mysteries.

[BYAKUYA laughs]

[BYAKUYA]
I know!

It's because it has
a crush on you, Senku.

[groans]

I don't need that kinda
crap right now.

I wanna know about all
the science behind it.

[BYAKUYA] What kind of
preschooler are you?

[BYAKUYA
]The real reason the Moon

looks like it's following you
is 'cause it's super far away.

And because I choked hard
on a crucial portion

of the astronaut
selection trials.

It seems even farther
away from your old man.

I don't need to hear about

your little pity party
right now either.

[BYAKUYA]
I got a k*ller leg cramp

in the middle of the
clothed swimming test.

I was never a good
swimmer to begin with,

but that one still stings.

[SENKU] Do you know when they'll
be recruiting astronauts again?

Not soon.

It's something like
once per decade.

[SENKU]
I'm going to space.

So an astronaut then?

That's an excellent
dream, young man.

Work hard, and when
you grown up, you--

No. I'm going there
as soon as possible.

[BYAKUYA] Senku loves
space as much as I do,

but he always
thinks for himself,

and builds things for himself.

Science had gotten him,
hook, line, and sinker.

[TAIJU gasps]

[COLLEGE STUDENT A]
What's your next class?

[COLLEGE STUDENT B]
My grades are horrible.

[BYAKUYA] JAXA's looking
for astronaut candidates.

The first time in ten years.

[laughs]

[chuckles]

[TAIJU] What're we gonna do
with this thing, Senku?

[TAIJU]
Hm?

My hand's moving!
What did you do?

Of course it's moving.

I'm sending electricity
straight into the muscles.

[inaudible]

[gasps]

[BYAKUYA]
What is this crazy suit?

[yelps]

[BYAKUYA screaming]

[BYAKUYA]
My limbs are twitching

and doing breaststrokes
on their own!

You said the clothed
swimming test

was your biggest
hurdle, didn't you?

So we're shocking your muscles

with the electrode
training suit from hell.

[BYAKUYA] You're gonna
drown me with this thing!

[JAXA EXAMINER A]
You're saying a fifth grader

made the suit all by himself?

So did it prove useful to you?

[BYAKUYA]
No, of course not.

[JAXA EXAMINER A]
No surprise there.

[BYAKUYA]
Although...

[JAXA EXAMINER A]
Hm?

[BYAKUYA]
It meant the world that Senku

put in that much time and effort
because he wanted to help.

I had no choice but to swim
in it, even if it k*lled me.

And it turns out, in the end,

I made it through
the swimming test,

and consequently,
on to this interview.

I'm gonna become an
astronaut and go into space,

no matter what.

I'm gonna work for science.

That's the only way
I can repay Senku...

...for everything
he's done for me.

[REPORTER A] We're here
at the exciting launch

of the Soyuz rocket.

The crew is boarding now.
Their next stop is space...

[BYAKUYA] Hey, are you on
regular TV? Online?

Whatever. This is live, right?

Ishigami Byakuya! It's him!

Yo, Senku, knowing how you are,

I'd bet you're probably not even
watching the broadcast today.

But I'm bringing
home souvenirs--

some gifts just for you.

So wait for me!

Ah, shut up, ya geezer.

[BYAKUYA]
Crap, I gotta go.

If I don't get onboard now,

they might leave me
here on Earth!

[SENKU]
Turns out,

the man who actually founded
Ishigami Village...

...was Ishigami Byakuya.

He was also my father.

[BYAKUYA]
This is the crew of the Soyuz.

Commencing final
preparations for docking

with the International
Space Station.

[YAKOV]
Docking successful.

Ah.

[YAKOV laughs]

Welcome, friends, to the
International Space Station!

Yes, we're glad to have you!

Honored to be here.

Forgive my husband.

He may roar like a lion,
but on the inside,

he's a sweet little kitten.

Ishigami Byakuya.

And this gentleman
here is Shamil.

[LILLIAN] Ugh! Why are
these hallways so narrow?

Look, I ain't nothin'
like the rest of y'all!

I spent 50 million dollars
to buy a ride on the Soyuz.

I'm one of the first space
tourists in history.

Not to mention a certified
international celebrity.

A pop diva. I am Lillian!

Don't act like you
don't know me!

[YAKOV]
Oh, yeah, of course I do.

I even have all your CDs.

[LILLIAN] Then you get
how important I am!

Yes, ma'am. Please calm down.

[LILLIAN]
Do you really get it?

[BYAKUYA laughing]

[laughs]

Why'd ya have to go
and cr*ck up like that?

I could've kept up the
act longer, ya know.

I swear!

That was terrible!

I just couldn't take
any more of that bit.

Nobody really talks that way!

Such foolishness.

Stop laughing like
that, silly old man.

I'm sorry, y'all.
Just havin' some fun.

But I am Lillian Weinberg,
and I'm lookin' forward to this.

I promise to do my best
not to get in anyone's way.

[sighs]

I was scared this next
week was going to be hell.

[DALIA chuckles]

[DALIA] You really had us
fooled for a moment there.

Lucky you weren't being serious,

or I would've k*lled
you in no time.

Swear to God.

It's nice to meet
you. I'm Dalia.

That trembling giant over
there is my husband, Yakov.

[chuckles]

I thought you were going
to give me a heart att*ck.

Both I and Dalia are
experienced doctors,

so if you feel sick, you can
come talk to one of us.

[LILLIAN]
That's good to know. Thank you.

I'm really glad Yakov's here.

After all, it's his
second time in space.

He may be a wimp,
but he's also a veteran.

Only I can speak of
him in that way.

Just knock it off, old man.

Well, I'm actually
kind of a big deal.

[DALIA] Now don't you start
getting too full of yourself.

The girl behind him is Connie.
She was a staffer at NASA.

[CONNIE]
Uh, hi.

I'm a... a... huge fan of yours!

Like, a super fan!

Huh?

Ha! Oh, wow. I had no idea
you'd be so star struck.

So, uh... nice to meet you.

Come on. Why so shy, Connie?

You know you wanna
get her autograph,

so go ahead and ask her for one.

She won't bite.

Well, if you... don't mind.

'Course not. Glad to!

[CONNIE gasps]

[CONNIE]
Thank you so much!

[YAKOV laughs]

[YAKOV] Did you see how
I made that all happen?

Well now, since Lillian did
spend 50 million to get here,

I suppose it's time to give her

the kind of greeting
worthy of a pop diva.

Huh?

This'll be the background
music for the whole trip.

That's a great idea!

Play it all day, every day.

No! Please you don't
have to do that!

I'd probably die from
embarrassment!

I was just kiddin'
earlier, I swear!

[OTHERS laughing]

[LILLIAN]
♪ Nowhere to turn. ♪

♪ Nowhere to hide. ♪

♪ Between a rock
and a hard place. ♪

♪ Someone to find. ♪

♪ I know that times are tough, ♪

♪ Just down and out, ♪

♪ Putting my faith
in tomorrow. ♪

♪ I'm ready to go, but I don't
know where to start. ♪

♪ Each and every road seems
to be calling to me. ♪

♪ Pulled in every which way,
so I make my own path. ♪

♪ A deep breath,
and my best foot forward. ♪

♪ One small step from zero. ♪

♪ I'm not afraid. ♪

♪ 'Cause the world
that we want ♪

♪ Is right here
for us to make. ♪

♪ Just taking one
small step to hero. ♪

♪ I'll take the chance. ♪

♪ And when I do, ♪

♪ I'll be thinking of the
same thing I always do. ♪

♪ It's always you. ♪

And that was my
mini-concert in space.

I'm a little too embarrassed
to sing acapella

for my new astronaut friends,

so I'm gonna sign off now.

Bye-bye. I love y'all!

[BYAKUYA chuckles]

[LILLIAN]
Hey, Byakuya, Shamil,

y'all wanna use the comm next?

Like to get in touch
with your family?

Got no one to call,
so I think I'll pass.

How 'bout you?

Yeah, no.

I do have a son named
Senku back at home,

but he's a bratty kid,
like our friend Shamil here.

He's not really the
sentimental type.

Tryin' to get in touch
with him right now

would just distract him
from his research.

Can't have that.

[SENKU chuckles]

[SENKU]
So, the distribution of posts

about stone swallow figures
being found around the world

is directly proportional

to the distribution of
swallow populations.

Crunching numbers for
statistical significance

would be overkill.

It's clear these stone
figures are real swallows

that have somehow
been petrified.

Swallows turning to
stone across the globe?

It's ridiculously inane.

Now this is exciting.

[LILLIAN humming]

[BYAKUYA yawns]
Can't sleep?

Oh, sorry, was I too loud?

[BYAKUYA] Agh. Loud enough
to pop my eardrums.

[LILLIAN scoffs]

Hah. Easy, I'm just
playin' with ya.

You really love to sing, huh?

I've been doin' it a long time.

[BYAKUYA]
Since you were little?

My whole life.

One day, I found a
record in the trash.

I listened to that
thing constantly.

Actually, I think I wore out
my record player on it.

I mean, it really did stop
workin' after a while.

When that happened,
I started singin' for myself.

It was just so much fun to
sing my little heart out.

And now that I'm older,

I wanna sing for
all kinds of people

livin' all over the world.

I wanna make them smile
and feel glad to be alive.

If I can give people joy,

well, that would
make me happy too.

It just feeds my soul.
It makes me feel like--

[LILLIAN gasps]

[LILLIAN growls]

Oh, sorry about that!

Jeez, you're a stinker, ya know?

Listen.

If you don't mind me asking,

you think you could sing
for Senku someday?

[LILLIAN]
I'd love that.

[BYAKUYA]
I'm miso soup!

Help me! I don't
wanna get eaten!

Whew, I'm flying!

Zero gravity!

I'm free!

[BYAKUYA laughs]

[BYAKUYA]
Can't get away from me!

You sure are having fun, huh?

[BYAKUYA]
Yo.

Do ya wanna try
some Japanese food?

No, this nutrient jelly
is enough for me.

For every meal?

Ugh. Sounds boring.

Here.

So, are those noodles?

[BYAKUYA] Not just noodles,
it's custom-made ramen.

Tastes exactly like
the ramen at the place

my son and I go to all the time.

I have no doubt it's
very delicious, Byakuya.

but it's too much.

We've come here to work,
and our time is precious.

Sorry, fun's not crucial
to human survival.

Come on, man, just have
a taste. It'll shock ya!

[sighs]

[BYAKUYA]
Mh-hm?

[BYAKUYA chuckles]

[gasps]

[BYAKUYA]
See? It's scary good!

[LILLIAN]
Ooh! I wanna try some, too!

[SHAMIL]
No.

Look there. Outside the window.

The Earth.

[gasps]

[BYAKUYA]
Senku.

[gasps]

[inaudbile]

[SHAMIL]
What's happening?

NASA, Roscosmos--
I can't reach either one.

The comms out?

No, there's no one responding.

Um, ham radio's the same.
All lines are silent.

That light...

Something happened down there.

Something terrible!

[CONNIE]
What? Like a nuclear w*r?

You shouldn't say
such foolish things!

Yes! The Internet still works.

Anyone tweetin' about
what's goin' on?

Nothing. Everybody stopped
posting at the same time.

I know! Live camera feeds!

Huh?

Bingo!

[BYAKUYA gasps]

[BYAKUYA] What the hell?
Are those statues?

But how's that possible?

No, there's more.

[gasps]

[CONNIE]
Oh my God.

[YAKOV]
We can't act rashly!

Let's wait here.

There are seven billion
humans on the planet,

so let's wait for the
survivors to contact us.

They'll be able to help us!

So how long should we wait?

For a month? Maybe two?

With humanity in this state,
we have no hope for a rescue.

We're floating in
space, remember?

Well then, let's go back.

[ALL gasp]

Hold on. What are you
even talking about?

Did you hear what I said?

Out of all the people down
there, someone can help us!

[BYAKUYA]
You're wrong, Yakov.

There are only six.

We are the last humans left.

So we can't just sit here
and wait around for help.

Because now it's up to
us to help them out!

All the seven billion
people on Earth need us!