05x12 - Hurl, Interrupted/Diamonds Are for Never

[bunniefuu]

This program is rated G

and is suitable for
general audiences.

the c♪

♪ Dodging girls
like ping pong balls ♪

♪ Just to reach
the bathroom on time ♪

♪ Hey! Hey! Hey! ♪

♪ Leaping over laundry piles ♪

♪ Diapers you can smell
for miles ♪

♪ Guy's gotta do what he can
to survive ♪

♪ In the Loud House!
In the Loud House! ♪

♪ Duck, dodge,
push and shove ♪

♪ It's how
we show our love ♪

♪ In the Loud House!
In the Loud House! ♪

♪ One boy and ten girls ♪

♪ Wouldn't trade it
for the world! ♪

♪ Loud house ♪

♪ Loud! ♪

♪ Loud House! ♪

[baby]
Poo poo!

♪

♪

[percussive rock music]

g*ng way, burger eaters!

Wait up you guys!

Hup!

Whoa!

Hup, ugh!

Grant, hit us!

Here's to us, guys!

The new tri-county
roller derby champions.

We really earned
these burgers.

Yeah!

I'd hip-check just for fun,

but when
you win a prize for it,

we're doin' good work here,
people.

And when the prize
is a free trip to Dairyland,

it's even sweeter.

I can't wait to ride
Whipped Scream again.

I've watched this,
like, a million times.

I heard about this kid
that went on it

just one time,
and he never stopped barfing!

Hmm.
You're awfully quiet, Lynn.

Aren't you pumped
for Dairyland?

Pfft.
Of course I am.

Who's sayin' that I don't
want to go to Dariryland, huh?

Anyone who says that is
getting an elbow to the glutes.

[munching]

[bell ringing]

[chatter and footsteps]

[whispering]
Psst, Clyde.

[shouts]
Oh, hey, Lynn!

Shh-shh.
I need your advice.

Um, okay.

But what if I'm terrified
of giving the wrong advice?

Dr. Lopez says I tend
to let my fear control me.

Bingo, and that's
exactly why I came to you.

Let's say
I had this friend

and this friend was super tough
and awesome at everything,

but she-- or he--
was afraid of just one thing.

Lynn, no disrespect,

but I don't have time
for hypotheticals.

How can I help you?

Fine,
here's the deal.

I'm going
to Dairyland tomorrow,

and I don't wanna ride
Whipped Scream

because... I'm terrified
of throwing up!

Blegh.

Lynn, no one
likes to throw up.

Yeah, but I hate it.

I did it once
when I was little,

and it got all into my nose,
and I tasted it for a week.

[shudders]

Never again.

So how do I b*at this stupid
fear and get on with my life?

You can't b*at it.

You just need
to live with it,

and be honest
with your friends about it.

Look them right
in the eye and say,

"I am not comfortable
with this situation."

[laughing]

[making buzzer noise]

That's dumb.
What else you got?

There's no other way.

Dr. Lopez says you
have to own up to your fears.

Otherwise, you end up
shoving them so far down,

they end up coming
out in really weird ways.

[bell ringing]

And I have a fear of being
tardy, so can I please go?

Fine. I'll just have to
figure something else out.

Thanks for nothing,
McBride.

[distant screams
and ominous music]

[giggling]

[gulps]

I planned the whole day
around riding Whipped Scream.

A-yup!

We go on at :
: and o'clock

with bathroom breaks built in
for post-ride clean up.

Okay, I'm just gonna
be honest with you guys.

Big roller coasters scare me.

[deep breath]

I don't wanna
go on Whipped Scream!

Uh, actually, I kind of--

[laughing]

What a scaredy-cat!

Right?
Lynn, Margo, come on.

Let's hit
the big-girl ride.

Paula, you can
go ride the Lil' Skimmer.

Yaaaaaay!

[gasps]

Okay, fine I'm coming.

Wait!

Uh, why rush
into things, right?

Let's take in all the
other wonders that Dairyland

has to offer first, and
save Whipped Scream for last.

The longer we wait,
the bigger the barf will be.

Hmm.

[nervous laughter]

Hmmm.

[nervous laughter]

All right.

Really?
Oh, phew.

I mean, who wants to see
the butter churning show?

Let's go.

Hey, Dairylanders!

I'm Kai, churn-maiden,

and today I'm gonna teach
you all about butter churning.

Woo!

It takes about
to minutes

of vigorous churning to get
your butter nice and creamy!

Can I get a volunteer
to help?

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Let's churn, baby, churn.

[grunting]

♪

[grunting]

Uh, Miss,
I think it's ready.

Are you kidding me?

This stuff needs
at least another hour.

[splattering]

I'll go.

[horn fanfare]

Isn't Seas o' Cheese
great?

♪ Dairy binds
the world together ♪

♪ Dairy binds us all ♪

Ugh, Lynn this is lame.

Shh.
We're about to hit Switzerland.

♪ Dairy binds
the world together ♪

♪ Dairy binds us all ♪

♪ If you're feelin'
kinda farty ♪

♪ You can
blame it on Havarti ♪

[music stops]

[voice on PA]
Hey Dairylanders,

it's your ole' pal
Tippy the Cow.

Due to some
unforeseen curdlin' ,

it looks like we're gonna be
stuck here for a little while.

Oh, gee, that's a shame.

Guess we gotta wait.

[low clank]

Ugh!
I'm starving!

Well, look around!

There's all the cheese curds
and milk you could ask for.

[slurping]

Ah.

And it's a great way
to load up on calcium.

Ew. I've had enough of this.

I wanna ride
Whipped Scream.

Me too.
I say we swim for it.

[splashing]

W-wait!

Don't you wanna sail
through the land of lactose?

Ugh, dang it.

Guys!
I can't get my cast wet!

♪

Finally,
Whipped Scream, here we come.

[whimpering]

Whoa, look at that!

Lynn, seriously?

It's just a petting zoo.
Come on!

Huh!

Hi there.

Wanna meet Ursula,
the angriest cow in Michigan?

Heck yeah, we do!

[Latin guitar music]

Okay, Lynn, that's it.

You've been stalling
all day.

I'm starting to think that

you don't wanna ride
Whipped Scream.

What?
That's a load.

Then let's go ride it.

Right now.

[deep breath]

[gears clanking]

[pneumatic hissing]

[buzzing]

Uh, Lynn,
are you sure you wanna drink

that dairianna-grande-
iced-tea-cichino

before we ride?

Just worry about
yourself there, champ.

Hey, we're next!

[distant screaming]

[slow ominous music]

Hmm.

Hey, don't push me!

Whoa!

[zapping]

[pneumatic hissing]

Aw man, it's broken.

Oh well, let's go.

[zapping]

[girl]
Oh, it's even fast now.

[smacks]

[Ursula brays in distance]

Ursula.

Sorry guys, gotta pee.

♪

[Latin music]

[roaring]

[Tippy]
He-hey, Dairylanders,

it's your old pal Tippy.

No need to panic, but there's
a wild rampaging cow

loose in the park.

Huh?

[screaming]

Huh?
Lynn, there you are!

Can you believe it?

We're not gonna get
to go on Whipped Scream!

I heard!
But, safety, right?

I'm sure we'll have plenty more
chances to ride another time.

We got our whole lives
ahead of us!

Actually, you don't.

[sproing]

No, no,
I mean about the ride.

Today's the last day
of Whipped Scream.

We're closing it down
to break ground

on the new Dairyland Hotel.

What?

Oh. What?

What's the only thing better
than playing at Dairyland?

Staying at Dairyland!

Now run for your lives!

Come on, everyone!
Moo-ooo-ove!

Oh, I can't believe
we missed our chance

for a final ride
on Whipped Scream.

I know, it's not fair.

We'll never
get to ride it again.

Oh.

[mooing]

Uh, I'll be right back.

[light instrumental music]

Hmm.

♪

Oof.
Ursula, there you are!

[grunting]

Let's put down the cow head,
and head back to your pen now.

[angry roar]

[gasps]

[shattering]

♪

[gasp]

[tires screeching]

Hoo-ha,

Hup!
Whoa, girl!

♪

[laughing]

Nice move.

You ever thought about
joining a roller derby team?

Aah!

[moaning and thud]

[music tempo quickens:
upbeat pop rock]

[roaring]

♪

[hooves pounding]

[snorting]

♪

[grunting with effort]

[metallic thud echoing]

[cheering]

That was amazing!

You're welcome.

Now, you can reopen the park.

Ha, thanks kid.

Woo-hoo, Lynn!

That was incredible.

Thanks to you,
we're gonna get our puke on!

Yup, you guys have fun.

Wait, aren't you coming
with us?

[sighs]
No, I'm not.

I should've been honest
with you guys from the start.

I don't wanna
go on Whipped Scream

because I'm terrified
of throwing up.

I know you're all
gonna give me a hard time,

but it's just how I feel.

We're not gonna
give you a hard time.

You mean, you don't think
I'm being a total wimp?

No way!

Would a total wimp
be brave enough to ride

the angriest cow
in Michigan?

If you don't wanna
go on Whipped Scream,

it's totally cool with us.

Yes!
Not today, barf.

Ahem.

Paula, sorry we gave you
a hard time about not riding.

You're still
cool with us.

Oh, it's fine.
Now go puke your brains out.

All right!

Woohoo!

[distant screaming]

Phew, I am so glad that
is not us up there,

right, Lynn?

[stomach gurgling]

Lynn?

All the cheese curds
and milk you could ask for.

[slurping]

Whoa girl!

[groaning]

[Paula]
You don't look so good.

I don't feel so good either.

[heaving]

[vomiting]

Urgh.

Are you okay, Lynn?

Actually, I'm fine.

I mean,
barfing wasn't fun,

but it also wasn't nearly
as bad as I remember.

That was amazing,
let's go again!

You know what, I'm in!

I'm not afraid
of throwing up anymore.

Sweet!
Let's get back in line!

Shoosh, yeah!

Paula, are you okay
here by yourself?

[light piano music]

Oh, I am good.
Go get your puke on.

Woo-woo!
Let's barf, baby!

Woohoo!

Yeah!
Woo-hoo-hoo!

[metal music and splattering]

[breezy,
' s-style i♪strumental]

♪

And now,
for my next trick,

I shall make this ordinary
household bird disappear.

[light clapping]

[sighing]
Ooh?

Uh?

[tinkling]

Gimme, gimme, gimme!

For the rest of you,
prepare to be amazed.

-Shazam!
-Boo.

Give it up, Stinkoln.

We know your hat
has a false bottom

and Walt's underneath it.

Uh, impossible!
'Tis magic.

Lemme see the hat then.

[grunting]

Stop it!

[tweeting]

Behold!

I, Lincoln the magnificent,
have made the bird reappear.

-Uh, thank you.
-Ugh.

[humming]

[yells]
Hi Mr. Grouse!

So... where'd you get
that ring I saw you holding?

Oh, you mean this one,
Nosy-Rosie?

I found it in the ground with
my trusty treasure detector.

Yeah, there's a precious
stones and metal show

comin' to Royal Woods,
and I plan on sellin'

whatever I find around town.

Oh, I'm gonna
be rollin' in dough.

Dough?

Well, being a money enthusiast
myself, I think I can help you.

Hey!

Yeah,
Bob Grouse works alone.

Get your own tools.

Where am I going to find
a treasure detecting device?

Hm. Ha!

Lisa, I need your genius,
it's an emergency.

[zapping and giggling]

Gah.
How can I help you?

Time travel?
Atom splitting?

Quantum physics?

I need you to
trick out my royal ride

with treasure
finding capabilities.

Plee-e-ease.

Meh, a bit pedestrian,
but, sure.

Yay!

Lily, stay
put 'till I get back.

We're almost done
with the transformation

then you can attend
first grade in my place.

[pop]

[giggling]

[bird chirping]

Ay, ay, ay!
Keep it down over there!

[clicking and beeping]

[engine revving]

[coughing]

What in tarnation?

Hey there, Mr. G.
Didn't see ya there.

Check out my new ride.

A state-of-the-art
treasure finding machine

with highly
sensitive treasure sensors.

Oh, don't waste
your time searching the park.

I b*at you to it.

[jingling]

Why, you... [muttering]

[beeping]

Sounds like
I got another hit!

Excusez-moi.

[mechanic humming]

[whirring]

[soft drilling]

[tinkling]

[Grouse growling]

And before you even ask,
Lola Loud works alone.

Tah-tah.

[wheels screeching]

[coughing]

[annoyed grumbling]

[whistling]

[engine humming]

Hey, what's
goin' on here, Grouse?

[laughing]

Check it out, two can
play at this game, Loud.

[grumbling]

[beeping]

[engine revving]

♪

[chiming]

Don't even
think about it, kid.

Now, scram!

[engine revving and beeping]

[chuckling]

Hm?

[both growling]

[laboured breathing]

Hey!

[engine humming]

Ha!

[gasp]

How are you this fast?

You get pretty fast
chasin' people off your lawn!

[yells]

[thud]

[both scream]

Get off my car!

[crashing]

Apparently this town ain't
big enough for the both of us.

Well I'm not stopping.

I don't quit.

Then we gotta
split up Royal Woods.

You don't cross
into my territory,

and I don't cross into yours.

Deal?

You got yourself a deal.

♪

Hmm, looks like this
is part of my territory.

[engine humming]

[beeping and clicking]

Hmm. All clear,
I'm on my side.

[breezy pop music]

[beeping]

[gasps]

[engine revving]

[bleeping]

[zooming]

Hey!

[heavy breathing]

-Bingo!
-There it is!

[growling]

Move it, gramps.

I don't think so, kid.

[gasping]

[tinkling]

Now, clearly look at this,
right there.

That's my side of the line.

You wish.
It's clearly on my side.

[unintelligible arguing]

Hey, uh, actually, chiefs,
it's on both your sides.

Ha, so it's half mine.

Ah, fine.
We'll bring it to

the Precious Stones
and Metals Show tomorrow,

and split the cash - .

-What do you say?
-I'm in.

Great.

And I'll just hold onto
the diamond in the meantime.

Ha-uh, no.
I wasn't born yesterday.

Why should you hold it?

'Cause
I'm more responsible.

Plus, I don't trust you.

Well,
I don't trust you.

Hey, why don't
you guys compromise.

Rotate watching it
every hour on the hour.

Oh, I like the sound of that.

Works for me.

-Deal?
-Deal.

Hey, now that Flip's helped you
out, you gotta help Flip out.

Who's gonna get my back?

[shuddering]

♪

[grumbling]

Ooh, nature calls.

[whoosh]

[gasp]

He's leaving it unattended?

[grumbling]

I knew he was irresponsible.

Okay, here's my offer.

You get the diamond,
I give you protection.

If Lincoln tries
any more magic on you,

I'll make him disappear.

[chirping]

[tense instrumental music]

♪

Ah.

[gasping]

The diamond!

[growling]

♪

Hey Lynn, look!

Now they're stinky,
now they're not!

[growling and thudding]

[tinkling]

Aha!
Got ya, Blondie.

♪

Hm.

[plop]

Eh, we got a nibble.

[reel snaps]

[giggling]
Again!

No, not you, Lily.

[plop, whoosh]

I know what it needs!

[gasps]
It's gone!

Grouse!

[chuckling]

Where is it?

[gasps]

Ew. You put it under
an old football helmet?

It's gonna smell like
sweat, and faded glory!

Okay.
This is not working.

I don't trust you
to watch the diamond,

and you don't trust me.

[ding]

BRB.

♪

We'll watch it together.

That's fine by me and
just so there's no malarkey

[jingling]

There.

Now neither of us
should be able to touch it

until we take it
to the show tomorrow.

Wait, why do you get the key?

Wait, uh.

[slurping]

Aaah.

[gasping]

Now, don't worry.
It won't be in there long.

I eat a lot of fiber.

Ew.

[relaxed jazz music]

♪

[snoring]

[owl hooting]

[rooster crowing]

[sighing]

Huh, huh?
[screams]

[snoring]

Augh! What
are you doin', Sparkles?

Ugh!

[gasping]

Ah!

Where'd you stash it,
Grouse?

I didn't touch the dang thing!

That sounds like something
a diamond thief would say!

[grumbling]

Hey! Keep your grubby
little paws off my stuff!

You're actin'
a lot like someone

who stole a diamond,
and is tryin' to cover it up!

Maybe the stone
is in your house!

[grunting]

[door clicking]

Dah, dah, dah-
[screams]

-Grouse?
-Is it in there?

[both screaming]

Huh?

Charles, go to town.

[growling and ripping]

Where is that diamond?

Where is that thing?

[Lincoln screaming]

[thudding]

[Lincoln] We're okay.
Thanks for asking.

[grunting]

[heavy breathing]

[jack hammer pounding]

All right,
what the ding--

[screaming]

[all gasp]

[loud crashing]

Lola?

What has gotten into you,
young lady?

Apparently the same
cognitive disturbance

that's gotten into Mr. Grouse.

[engine hums]

Well, that piece of
work you call a daughter

stole my diamond!

Our diamond!
And I didn't steal it, he did!

Yes you did!

[both growling]

Hold on a minute.

[light calliope music]

Huh?

[Lynn Sr.] What's happening?
Did something happen?

I can't see anything!

This is one of my magic boxes.

It has a false bottom.

The diamond
must've fallen through.

Does that mean it was
in there the whole time?

Yup.

[gasping]

[sighing]

I'm sorry about this,
little Loud.

Maybe I should of placed more
trust in ya from the get-go.

Yeah.
I'm sorry too.

Hey, we still got time to sell
this puppy at the gem show!

What do ya say?

[heavy breathing]

I say we ride!

Hyup!

♪

Oh, we're really
rollin' in it now.

Nice doin'
business with ya, kid.

[flutter]

What now?

This should be enough to pay
for the damages to my house.

That's fair.

[sighing]

Mr. Grouse, wait.

Here.

This is for
the damages to your house.

Aw, gee.
Thanks, kid.

Mighty sweet of ya.

Hm, you know,
I don't think all this cash

has to go toward repairs.

We could keep a few bucks
for ourselves.

Really? But
what should we do with it?

[recorded bell music]

Ice cream?

You got yourself a deal,
partner.

You know,
we make a really good team.

♪ May sound bad
but ain't the case ♪
this tiny space ♪

♪ In the Loud House!
In the Loud House! ♪

♪ Duck, dodge,
push and shove ♪

♪ That's the way
we show our love ♪

♪ In the Loud House!
In the Loud House! ♪

♪ Laundry piles
stacked up high ♪

♪ Hand-me-downs
that make me cry ♪

♪ Stand in line to take a pee,
never any privacy ♪

♪ Chaos with kids ♪

♪ That's the way
it always is ♪

♪ In the Loud House ♪

[bubbling]