* Martha was an average dog
* She went... and... and...
(barking, growls)
* When she ate
some alphabet soup *
* Then what happened
was bizarre. *
On the way to Martha's stomach,
the letters lost their way.
They traveled to her brain,
and now...
* She's got a lot to say
* Now she speaks...
How now, brown cow?
* Martha speaks
* Yeah, she speaks
and speaks and speaks *
* And speaks and speaks.
What's a caboose?
When are we eating again?
* Martha speaks...
Hey, Joe, what do you know?
My name's not Joe.
* She's not always right,
but still that Martha speaks. *
Hi, there.
* She's got a voice,
she's ready to shout *
* Martha will tell you
what it's all about *
* Sometimes wrong,
but seldom in doubt *
* Martha will tell you
what it's all about *
* That dog's unique...
Testing, one, two.
* Hear her speak
* Martha speaks and speaks
and speaks and speaks and... *
* Communicates, enumerates
* Elucidates, exaggerates
* Indicates and explicates
* Bloviates and overstates
and...
(panting)
* Hyperventilates!
* Martha-- to reiterate--
Martha speaks. *
TD:
Are you ready for a story
that's bizarre?
It's odd how
people keep disappearing.
It's kind of farfetched.
Strange is good.
We want strange.
Weird. Wacky. Odd.
TD:
Watch out for these
and other words--
words like "ordinary"
and "normal."
Get ready for the strangest
Martha story yet.
(thunderclap)
(rocking chair creaks)
(cries)
I'm up! I'm awake!
What's wrong with Jake?
I imagine he's not happy
about going to bed.
"Imagine"?
Isn't that when you try
and picture something
in your head?
Mm-hmm.
Why imagine?
He's right in front of us.
Anyone can see he's not happy.
(burbles)
(cries)
Maybe Firedog Freddie can help.
"Firedog Freddie"?
It was my favorite
bedtime story when I was little.
I loved this story so much.
Oh, never heard of it.
You weren't around.
Can you imagine?
We were actually
a Martha-less home.
Helen had a fantasy
of being a firehouse dog.
I used to pretend
my tricycle was a fire truck.
Want me to read it
to you, Jake?
(gurgles)
"Firedog Freddie.
"Firedog Freddie was
an adventurous fellow.
"He wore a hat that was red
and a coat that was yellow.
"When the fire bell rang,
"he jumped to his feet.
"He slid down the pole
and roared down the street.
"He climbed up the ladder
"with the hose and his mitt,
and put out each fire
lickety split."
(Martha snores)
HELEN:
Firedog Martha was
the bravest dog around.
(alarm rings)
If a fire was burning,
that's where Martha
could be found.
(siren blares)
Firedog Martha!
Won't you save me, please?
I promise that I won't complain
if you should give me fleas.
Don't worry, worried lady.
That fire has met its match.
And if I get some fleas on you,
just show me where to scratch.
ALL:
Hooray for Firedog Martha!
Our money you won't take.
But maybe we can thank you
with this juicy,
ten-pound steak.
(gasps)
(sniffs)
Good gravy, that smells great!
(siren blares)
(beeping)
(siren blares, Jake cries)
Hey, that's not my siren.
That sounds like Baby Jake.
I guess I'm only dreaming,
though I thought I was awake.
Oh, no!
There goes my steak!
(crying continues)
Wha-- wowzer, what a dream!
(nervous chuckle)
MARTHA:
Man, oh, boy.
Firedog Freddie
really inspired me.
I want to be
a firehouse dog, too.
If I'm any good at it,
maybe I'll even get
to meet Freddie.
You know, Martha,
Firedog Freddie is just a tale.
Of course he has a tail.
He's a dog, isn't he?
No, I meant
the other kind of tale.
Like a story.
He isn't real,
it's fiction.
Fiction?! Fiction means
a made-up story.
Firedog Freddie
is as real as I am.
Uh... I hate to break
this to you,
but I don't think any of
that stuff really happened.
But it's in a book!
It's right there
in black and white.
At least I think
it's black and white.
And even if it's fiction,
it might be based on reality.
Well...
And even if there's
not a Firedog Freddie,
there could be
something even better.
What?
Firedog Martha!
Can you imagine it?
Me in yellow boots,
riding on top of a fire engine?
The wind in my fur,
bugs in my teeth...
HELEN:
Martha...
And climbing ladders?
Saving people?
Wrestling with a big,
old fire hose?
Helen, this pooch was born
to be a firedog.
But Martha, you...
Sorry, can't stand
around chatting.
Those fires don't
put themselves out, you know.
Good luck.
Sorry, Martha.
You can't be
a firehouse dog.
You're not a Dalmatian.
You're still
not a real Dalmatian.
You're just
a pretend one.
(groans)
I know what I'm missing!
It was right there all the time.
Everyone knows
the truth.
All firemen
talk in rhyme.
You've been reading
Firedog Freddie.
Uh-huh, yeah!
It's fiction.
Firemen don't talk like that
in reality.
"Reality"?
Is that a town nearby?
Do they need a firehouse dog?
No, "reality" is another way
of saying "in real life."
It means
it's not pretend.
Oh.
Look, kid.
I like you.
You've got spunk.
And firefighters
are a spunky bunch.
Tell you what.
I'll introduce you to the g*ng
and put it to a vote.
Gee, thanks, Chief!
You see,
being a firehouse dog
has been my lifelong dream,
ever since I learned
about them last night.
Well, what do you say, guys?
Is she in or what?
(indistinct chattering)
Welcome aboard, Martha.
You're a firedog!
(firefighters cheering)
Wow!
Thank you all so much!
Looks like your dream
just came true.
Come on.
I'll show you around.
This is where we keep
our equipment.
And, boy,
do we have a lot of it.
Axes, oxygen tanks,
fire extinguishers, you name it.
Okay, where's the pole
you slide down?
We're getting to that.
And this is
the dispatcher's office.
Hmm? What's a dispatcher?
(garbled radio transmission)
Well, that's someone
who answers emergency calls
and then tells
the fire truck where to go.
The dispatcher
is like our lifeline
to the rest of the world.
Without him,
we'd be sunk.
Is the pole next?
It's coming.
Keep your shirt on.
When the crew isn't in training
or in classes, they hang
out here and wait
for a call to come in.
(microwave beeping)
Fire alarm!
The fire pole!
(grunting)
Yikes!
Relax, Martha.
It's not an alarm.
That's just Bud's popcorn.
You want some?
Uh-huh, of course.
MARTHA:
I tell you, Skits,
it's not like
my fantasy.
Being a firehouse dog
is hard work.
They've got
all kinds of equipment.
Lots more than Firedog Freddie.
If I'm going to get the knack
of being a firehouse dog,
I really have to practice.
Skits, that's my equipment.
(barking)
Firemen have to get to fires
extraordinarily fast.
So they have to get
dressed quickly.
(barks)
Now, time me.
Hold still!
(grunts)
Ha!
(grunts)
Ugh! Sleeves!
(whines)
Uh-oh!
Clothes schmothes.
Climbing a ladder,
that's the real trick.
(grunts)
Whoa!
(screams)
Being good with a hose
is actually
the most important thing.
Okay, Skits, you distract him
while I get the hose.
(barking)
(barking)
Hey! Come back with my sponge!
(gasps, gurgles)
Aha!
(gasps, coughs)
This isn't like
I dreamed it'd be at all.
(gasping, coughing)
It's not anything
like I imagined.
In my fantasy, I was great.
In reality, I stink.
I'm sure you
weren't that bad.
No, Helen.
I have to face facts.
The truth is,
I just don't have the gift
for firehouse doggery.
(sighs sadly):
Mmm...
HELEN:
Firedog Martha.
What a crazy, silly clown.
(bell ringing)
Her hat won't stay on top.
Her coat keeps falling down.
She couldn't use the pole.
She couldn't steer the truck.
And when she tried
to use the hose,
she was simply out of luck.
(crowd laughing)
Firedog Martha,
her fantasy was wrong.
She goofed up in reality.
(laughter echoing)
She just did not belong.
(gasps)
Oh. That does it.
I'll go to the firehouse
and tell them I quit.
What do you
mean, you quit?
Well, the fact is,
I'm not a very good
firehouse dog.
I can't climb a ladder
or hold a hose or... anything.
Firehouse dogs
don't do that stuff.
Firedog Freddie does.
Eh, that's just a story.
In fact, real firehouse dogs
never go to fires.
They don't?
Are you kidding?
It's too dangerous.
(phone rings)
Firehouse. How
can I help you?
WOMAN:
Help! Help!
Our house is on fire!
There's smoke everywhere!
(alarm ringing)
Okay, calm down.
Where are you located?
We're at... (line goes dead)
Hello?
Hello? Phone went dead
before they could tell me
where the fire was.
(sniffing)
I can find that fire!
Quit kidding around--
this isn't some kid's tale.
This is reality.
(sniffing)
No, i-it's actually the truth.
I can smell smoke.
Follow me!
This way!
Hey, Martha,
climb on board.
We'd love to follow you, but
we have to stick to the road.
that fire?'s
That way!
HELEN:
Some firemen climb up ladders,
some firemen
use a hose,
but no one but our Martha...
Turn here!
...fights a fire with her nose.
(siren wailing)
(siren stops)
(sniffing)
She helped to put the fire out.
She buried burning embers.
Her dogged heroism
(cheering)
the town itself remembers.
The firemen were grateful.
They all shook Martha's paw.
That nose is tops!
...exclaimed the chief.
It fills me up
with awe.
"Firedog Martha,
she's not a work of fiction.
"She's really truly real,
plus, she has perfect diction."
(Dad chuckles)
The end.
Oh, well...
Congratulations!
Huh?
MARTHA:
Shh!
Huh?
MARTHA:
Shh!
Wow! That steak was
even better in reality
than it was
in my fantasy.
(whines)
No, not "fancy." "Fantasy."
It's when you think about
how great something will be.
It's sort of like a dream,
only you're awake.
Like how great it would be
to have another ten-pound steak.
(happy sigh)
(quiet grunt)
Hey!
Come back with my fantasy!
(grunting)
Now look what
you've done!
I'm going to have to dream up
another steak!
(sci-fi horror
movie music plays)
(crow cawing)
(gasps):
Steve! Don't!
I have to, baby.
Something bizarre is going on
in that basement.
Bizarre? What's that?
Don't you know?
Uh-uh.
You're beautiful, baby,
but you got a lot to learn.
"Bizarre" means
something strange is going on.
Like snow in July--
and that thing
in the basement.
(gasps)
(organ playing
sci-fi horror movie music)
(woman screams)
(gasps, yells)
(organ music continues over TV)
(gasps)
Wowzer, what a movie!
Uh, what happened
after that? Huh? Huh?
I don't know--
I couldn't
watch anymore.
I guess everyone turned
into a pickle spaceman.
That sounds pretty scary.
It was.
The tacky sets,
the wooden dialogue...
(shudders):
Terrifying!
TD:
Space creatures
are coming!
And they are us!
(whimpers):
Space creatures?
Helen?
Hmm, well, that's strange.
(eerie creaking)
(gasps)
(gasps)
They've pickled
my people!
(eerie moaning)
(strange voice):
Martha...
Time for your
vinegar bath.
No...!
It's really happening!
The pickles are coming!
Don't worry, Helen--
I'll protect you!
(door opens)
(panting):
Wh-Where are
the space creatures?
Let me at 'em!
Space creatures? Here?!
Yeah!
Cool!
Who told you that?
MARTHA:
TD!
I mean, I heard him say
space creatures are coming
who are us!
This is how rumors get started.
MARTHA:
You're sure?
You're certain there aren't
any pickles from space?
Positive. TD was just trying
to make my report
on space exploration
more interesting.
I don't know why
you won't use my ending.
It's kind of farfetched.
Who cares?
It sounds exciting.
Space creatures are coming!
MARTHA (gasps):
Pickle people!
Where?!
(groans):
Martha!
It's just TD again.
(panting):
Right. Uh, I knew that.
I was just fooling around.
(fake chuckle)
Why don't you fool around
somewhere else,
my report.inish practicing
Yeah.
We have a lot of work to do.
Uh, you, too.
Fine. I can take a hint.
I know when
I'm not wanted.
Hey, why don't you guys go hang
out at the grocery store?
Yeah. That'd be fun.
No, really--
I heard a rumor that Granny Flo
is introducing
some super-secret product today.
Huh? Will they have
free samples?
Maybe.
I'm in.
I've seen
that movie--
the one with the
giant pickles.
So how'd it end?
Do they defeat
the pickles?
I, uh, didn't
make it that far.
I was too scared
to watch.
Oh, drat.
I'd sure like to know,
just in case any giant pickles
ever show up here.
That's pretty
farfetched.
(Martha and Skits gasp, bark)
If you weren't
going to throw
anything,
why'd you tell us
to fetch?
Not "fetch."
(barks)
"Farfetched"--
it's when you don't think
something will happen.
You mean you
don't think we'll see
any giant pickle aliens
like the ones in the movie?
No alien would
ever be caught
looking as fake as
the ones in that movie.
(gasps)
What? What's wrong?
Nothing.
(nervous chuckle)
I guess all this pickle talk
has got me imagining things.
GRANNY FLO:
By creaky!
This'll be the greatest
marketing campaign
to ever hit this town!
Folks'll be wacky
for my new product.
And this is just the gimmick
to introduce them.
sci-fi horror movie music)
Granny's Pickles!
Shouldn't we explain to people
what we're doing?
I mean, these pickle costumes
look really strange.
Strange is good!
We want strange!
Weird, wacky, odd!
Don't explain a thing--
leave 'em guessing!
Creates more interest that way.
(organ continues playing
sci-fi horror movie music)
Now, the first wave of pickles
has already hit town.
Wave two, head out now!
Wave three, go in ten minutes!
(organ music resumes)
Knock it off!
This is a food factory,
not a music hall!
Meet me on Main Street
for our big pickle promotion
in one hour!
We haven't heard anything
about Granny Flo's
super-secret product.
I guess Ellen's rumor
really was a rumor.
What's a rumor?
Is it a new kind of free food?
A rumor is a story
or information
that may not be true.
Like that there would be
free samples.
You mean, there aren't any?
Uh-uh.
(Martha's stomach growling)
Too bad. I'm hungry.
And that's no rumor.
It's the truth.
I've got the growling
stomach to prove it.
What would happen
if aliens really did inv*de?
In movies, there's always
some way to defeat them.
Some weak spot
that does them in.
Yeah, like a virus.
A virus?
Or they can't breathe our air.
(gasps)
Puh-puh-puh-pickles!
Alien pickles!
Alien pickles in tacky suits!
What do we do?
We've got to stop them,
but how?
My mother says most people
destroy the nutrients
in vegetables
by overcooking them.
We need a really big pot.
If only we knew
how the movie ended,
then maybe we'd know
how to stop them.
Well, my parents haven't
returned the movie yet.
We could go to my house
and watch the rest.
Okay, you guys watch the movie,
and I'll warn the others.
I know just how to get
their attention.
MARTHA:
The pickle people!
Run for your lives!
"Pick the people
who run your life."
MARTHA:
The pickle people
are coming!
Run for your lives!
We're being invaded!
(gasps)
ALF:
Looks like pickles
aren't going to be
as popular as Granny hoped.
(watch beeps)
Hey, time to meet Granny.
I can't wait to get out
of this hot pickle suit.
Holy macaroni!
They're heading towards
the center of town.
(gasps)
The grocery store!
What if they destroy
all the alphabet soup?
(movie theme music
playing on TV)
It's odd how
people keep disappearing.
What's "odd" mean?
Odd means something is out
of the ordinary
or isn't normal.
What's "normal" mean?
You know,
normal: same as always,
the usual.
What's really odd is how this
guy keeps defining things.
(phone rings)
Talk about not normal. Hello?
(garbled voice)
No, we haven't found out
how to defeat them.
Will, hurry!
The pickles are heading
towards Main Street!
(gasps)
That's where
the library is!
Those brine-filled bullies
better not touch those books!
You've got to stop them!
We're on the job,
but keep watching!
Notice anything unusual
about those pickles, baby?
What does "unusual" mean?
Different, like a peanut-butter-
and-tuna-fish sandwich.
I can't take
much more of this!
Neither can I.
(phone rings)
Hello?
Have you figured out
how to defeat them yet?
No, but I've heard
the most disgusting
sandwich idea ever. Tuna...
MARTHA:
No time for that!
Hurry! We've got to stop them.
Fast-forward to the end.
Good idea.
When you find out the answer,
have TD meet me
at the grocery store.
I'll try and hold them off
until then. Thanks.
My pleasure.
(movie fast-forwarding)
Water!
I thought it was farfetched,
but water really does destroy
the pickles.
At last!
What's farfetched is the plot
of this movie.
It's totally unbelievable.
I got to report
to Martha
about the water!
Can I borrow your bike?
Yeah. Hey, could you return
the movie? It's on the way.
(door shuts)
Look, the pickles are
having a victory party.
I sure hope TD gets here soon
with that pickle report.
TD:
Martha!
Water!
No, thanks.
I'm not thirsty.
No, the way to defeat
the pickles is with water!
It makes them melt!
You're going to need
a bigger bottle.
That's unusual.
It looks like Martha
is deserting us.
(Skits whines nervously)
(grunting)
(all screaming)
(gasps)
That's refreshing.
I'm ruined. Ruined, you hear?!
What a world.
What a world!
What a promotion.
Very unusual. After this,
there won't be anyone on Earth
who hasn't heard
of Granny's pickles.
Really?
You'll have the most popular
pickles on the planet,
maybe even the universe.
So it wasn't a pickle
people invasion?
No, it was just an unusual way
for Granny to introduce
her new pickles.
Thank goodness I didn't spread
that rumor on my radio show.
Yeah, you could have
caused a panic.
The good news is, if
pickles ever do inv*de,
we know one dog
who can handle them.
Well, baby,
we made it.
And to show how
much I love ya,
I got you
a special gift.
A diamond?
No,
a dictionary.
If you need to know
what a word means,
you can look it up.
See? It's all here--
words like
"weird," "strange,"
"odd," wacky"
and "bizarre."
What did those words mean?
I forget.
Weird, strange,
odd, wacky and bizarre
all mean something
is out of the ordinary
or isn't normal.
Like the way you can't remember
what anything means, baby.
So was it as scary
as you thought it would be?
No, but all those
pickles made me hungry
for a hot dog with
extra relish.
Let's eat.
(thunder crashes)
TD:
That's our show.
Did you catch all of the odd
and unusual words?
What's a rumor?
A rumor is a story
or information
that may not be true.
"Bizarre" means something
strange is going on,
like snow in July.
Fiction? A fiction means
a made-up story.
Firedog Freddie is as real
as I am.
TD:
That's our show.
I hope you found it unusual.
(screams)
Ouch. Later.
To dig up some more fun words
and games, visit pbskids.org
* Who's that dog? *
* Who's
that dog? *
* Dog, d-d-dog, d-dog. *
That dog is Bert.
We're at Children's Hospital
Boston.
Bert is a volunteer
with the Pawprints program.
He enjoys coming to see the kids
because he gets to be petted
by a lot of children.
He's a friend.
MAN:
I think that it makes them feel,
for a little bit, like they're
not in the hospital
and they can take their mind
off things.
Bye, Bert!
MAN:
He gets to have
little doggie treats when we get
back to the office.
* He's that dog... *
* Dog, d-d-dog, d-dog. *
03x01 - Firedog Martha/Martha's Pickle
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A family dog gains the power of speech after the letters in some alphabet soup wind up misrouted to her brain instead of her stomach in this whimsical animated series adapted from books by Susan Meddaugh.
A family dog gains the power of speech after the letters in some alphabet soup wind up misrouted to her brain instead of her stomach in this whimsical animated series adapted from books by Susan Meddaugh.