03x07 - Demoncism/Sophomore Slump

[bunniefuu]

[" I'm from Another Dimension" by Brad Breeck plays]

It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension Gonna get a little weird Gonna have a good time I ain't from 'round here I'm from another woo-hoo Yeh-heah I'm talking rainbows I'm talking puppies Pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa Paaa It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension [Song ends]

Hey, this is Tom! I can't get to the mirror right now.

Leave a message after the shriek.

[cat meows]

Hi, dude! It's me, Star.

Anyway, just, uh, just wondering what you were up to.

Glossaryck.

No! Down! Glossaryck! I thought I thought we could meet up for that corn shake.

So, give me a call.

[knocking on door]

Hey, Pony Head Ooh! Sweat much? [Laughs]

What, me? Oh, I mean, that's ridiculous! Uh so Anyway, I don't mean to dive straight into hot goss, but Tom is acting super weird.

I thought things were going great, [Heavy breath]

and then all of a sudden he Are you okay? You're ruining the carpet.

- Okay, what is going on? - What? [laughs]

Oh! You know, that is so funny that you would think to say a thing such as that, because I most definitely did not run into Tom, and definitely he did not tell me to not tell you what's going on.

[chuckles]

Pony, what's going on? Tom's getting a demoncism, and he told me you can't know! [gasps]

Oh, no! I'm unreliable.

- Whaaat? - Okay, I gotta go now! Oh, no, you don't! [shouts]

A demoncism? Aren't those, like, the worst? [spits]

Yeah! They are! He's gonna ruin himself.

- We gotta stop him! - His demoncism is happening, like, right now! - Wait, what? Where? - Those things are, like, super secret! Like, you gotta get invited.

You do realize you were not invited, right? I'm not trying to rub that in your face, but [grunts]

This is not helping.

Look, we can go ask my ex.

He got demoncized.

Which ex? Sorry.

That sounded way more judgy that I wanted it to.

Oh, Bessie, are you talking right now? My big bad ex, Seahorse? You know, he's the one who wrote that song about me.

Blech.

[heavy metal shouting]

[feedback]

Aw, yeah! You're all trash! Aah! Aw! He was such a romantic.

Yeah, I-I tried that.

What kind of dummy do you think I am? - This mirror's garbage! - I'm sorry.

That's disappointing.

- Can I help you find a replacement? - No.

No! Get out! Thank you for choosing Reflecticore.

Have a mirror-ific day! Oh, what a nerd! Look how much water he needs now! He's a seahorse, Pony.

Yeah, well, he used to be all dry, like a cool horse.

Well, hello! Welcome to Reflecticore Mobile.

- Can I help you find a compact mirror? - Mm, I'm just dropping by to, like, see how you've been doing and stuff.

- [whispers]

And to ask about the demoncism! - Yeah, and that too.

- Please take your time browsing our collection.

- Uh, what? - Please take your time browsing our - Yeah, I got that! Don't you even have anything else to say to me? [forced chuckle]

Can I interest you in a three-year interdimensional plan? Seahorse! Hello! Wake up! It's me, Pony Head! [groans]

Can't we even talk like normal horsepersons? Well, you can talk to anyone with Reflecticore Mobile Technology.

Okay, you know what? You're broken, Seahorse.

You're not the man you used to be.

That's disappointing.

Can I help you find a replacement? [crying]

It's so horrible! It's like he doesn't even know me! And I'm the best person anyone could know! I'm like a gift! Oh, Pony, I am so sorry.

I'll take care of it.

A friend of ours is going to get a demoncism tonight, and we need to know where it's happening.

Can you give us directions using Reflecticore Mobile Technology? [squish]

You can go anywhere with Reflecticore Mobile Technology.

We just want a map, you corporate turd! [sobs]

I'll print a I'll print a map now.

[squish]

[buzzing]

[Pony Head whimpering]

[dramatic music]

[gong ringing]

You distract them.

I'll find Tom.

Oh, yeah, I got you, girl.

Watch this.

Excuse me! Some last-minute announcement! So, as all of you know, fall is coming up.

Okay, so let's take a vote on our new spooky robes.

The first color we're gonna vote on is maroon.

Yea or nay? All for yea, show your hands.

O-Okay, so we just not a hot ticket.

That's fine.

We just have one for yea.

Okay.

All right, Tom, just what do you think you're do?! [gasps]

- Oh, you look so nice! - What are you doing here? I'm here to stop you from making a terrible, terrible mistake! - If this is just another way to get my attention, you - Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.

I don't know what Pony told you, but it's not what you think.

- I genuinely want this.

- What? [sighs]

I need to change.

You're here being the best princess you can be, and it's really inspiring.

It's time for me to be a better prince.

Yeah, but whatever's going on out there looks creepy and dangerous.

I'm the prince of the underworld, okay? This is gonna be an easy procedure for a guy like me.

In and out! All this stuff the robed guys, the skulls, the fire - it's just for show.

- So, you're just gonna zap all your personality away so you can feel good about yourself? No! I have problems, and this is the only way to get rid of them! Whoa! See? Problems! You don't have to be like this, Tom! Yeah, well, I've already made up my mind, - and you're not gonna stop me.

- Fine, be that way! But I am not gonna stay here and watch you do this to yourself.

I didn't invite you, anyway, so - Great! - Great! Gah! Of course! Also, who is bringing what to the potluck, okay? Because I don't wanna see nothing but chips.

Come on, we're outta here.

All right, y'all, thank you so much for your time! Peace! [gong rings]

[dark music]

Brethren, this world is in danger.

There is a blight that plagues it.

Of course, we dream of a world pure as a piece of sweet corn, but if one kernel is infected, then the entire harvest is at risk.

Bring forth the son of the blight.

Son of the blight has arrived! [chuckles]

Thanks for coming out, everybody.

Whoa! Tight grip there.

That fool is so frustrating! I just wanna I just wanna! - Like, punch a tree or something? - I need to punch a tree! Girl! You know I hate trees.

[snapping]

Hey, hey! Thanks for the ride, guys! Love the massage table.

Commence the purification ritual.

[sneezing]

Okey-doke let the ceremony begin.

[reciting in foreign language]

[responding in foreign language]

[crows cawing]

Oh.

That's a nice touch.

[reciting in foreign language]

[responding in foreign language]

[zaps]

Wow! Magic manacles.

Magicals.

The cauldron! - Close your eyes.

- Okay, but no tickling! Hey.

Hey, man, this is real ceremonious and stuff, but it seems kind of flim-flam to [hiccoughs]

[zapping]

[evil scream]

It begins! [Tom growling]

Hold him! [screaming continues]

[reciting in foreign language]

Aah! [indistinct yell]

[grunting]

- Harder! Harder! - Yah!!! [flames explode]

Dang, not that hard.

[men screaming]

- What? That's weird.

- Something's wrong.

Huh? Where are you going? Aah! You're just gonna leave him up there like that? He'll be fine.

Magical mach ten blast! [gasps]

[silent growl]

Tom, it's okay.

I'm I'm here.

I'm right here.

[groans]

- Star? - Tom? Oh, my gosh, are you okay? I'm [excitedly]

in tremendous pain! [demoncist]

Congratulations, Master Lucitor.

The procedure was a success.

[growls]

Wow.

Hard to believe that one little demon was the source of so much rage! What? No, no.

No, no, no.

You still got thousands of these little guys inside.

We're gonna have to start you on a 13-year plan.

- What? - Yeah, this is all gonna be a long and painful process for all of us, but you were such a good boy today, you can help yourself to just one toy from the toy chest.

Oh, no.

No! No, no! I'm gonna be an evil demon forever! The important thing is that you want to improve yourself! You can still do that with a bunch of those little guys inside of you.

So, should we go again next weekend? No.

This is not worth it.

Well, if you're not coming back, you'd better make that one toy count.

- So, still up for that corn shake? - Yeah, that'd be cool.

[gasps]

You two have got to be kidding me.

[crunches]

Oh, no.

- Hey, there, big guy.

- Hey, Mama! So, you're ready for the new school year? Yep.

Still getting used to Earth life, though.

[slurps]

Hmm.

I see you're still wearing your cape.

Of course.

I'm a knight! Did I ever tell you about my friend who spent a summer in France? In France, everything was better the arthouse films, the fashion, the croissants.

She said it just like that [French accent]

"croissant.

" - Who does that? - Wow, your friend sounds annoying.

It was me, Marco.

"Croissant.

" Oh! [Chuckles]

But come on! I'm not annoying.

I just wear a cape.

Look, I'm sure everybody on Moony wore a cape.

Mewni.

It's pronounced "Mew-ni.

" Marco, I'm just trying to help.

And I'm just trying to help you properly say "Mewni.

" [French accent]

Croissant! Croissant! It's pronounced "croissant!" Hey, no! No, no, no! I'm not the croissant girl! I earned this cape, and by golly, I'm gonna wear it! - Good for you, Marco.

The cape looks cool.

- Thanks, Dad.

You are chained to the wall of Azgorth's dungeon surrounded by his feral imps, and only one holds the key to your freedom.

- What's in our surroundings? - Nothing.

- I try and break the chains.

- The imps eat your hands.

- Aah! - Uh I cast a healing spell! - The imps eat your hands.

- Marco! Oh, um use the butter.

What? There's no butter! Didn't you hear what she just said? There's nothing in our surroundings! Put it on the chains, slide your hands out, hide in the vents! This isn't Mewni, Marco! It's not going to work.

- It worked.

You're free.

- Oh! Oh! Next we go find Ludo, say the Whispering Spell, destroy Toffee! No! This isn't Mewni! Yeah, you destroy Toffee, save Mewni.

Congratulations! [claps hands]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! It's okay, Ferguson! It's just a game! No.

On Mewni, this actually happened! They made me a knight! [door slams]

Where Where did Ferguson and Alfonso go? - They left.

- What? Why? Oh, they just get annoyed when you talk about Mewni all the time.

It's no big deal.

What? [Marco]

All right, sensei, just be straight with me, man.

Am I annoying when I talk about Mewni? Of course not, Marco.

You had a life-changing experience on Mewni, - and it changed you.

- Yeah, that's right.

And it changed me too.

[chortling]

Look at it! Look at it, yeah! Ohh, ohh, it's a it's a cape.

We're cape bros now, dude.

- Oh, that's that's great.

- Marco, you're making a face.

What face? This face? It's just my face.

Hey, hey, hey No secrets.

We're cape bros now.

Oh, well, it's no big deal, but I-I earned my cape.

Earned? Is that a word you made up? I just went through a lot to get my cape.

I mean, I helped save Mewni, you know? Oh, yeah.

[Chuckles]

I keep forgetting, you have to "earn" things.

[laughter]

[sobbing]

[sniffling]

You're right, Marco.

- I guess I didn't earn this.

- No, sensei.

I mean, did I really earn my red belt? [grunts]

Or my green belt? I guess I didn't earn any belts.

[chortles]

You know, I expected this from my mother and my probation officer, but I didn't expect this from you.

[Marco]

You know, first Ferguson and Alfonso were weird, and then sensei was weird.

[sighs]

I-I hate to say this, but it's like my best friends are jealous of all that I've accomplished.

[sighs]

Look, I get it.

Earth and Mewni are totally different.

It must be hard to readjust.

No, Jackie, you don't get it.

This isn't about me, this is about them not being able to accept what this means.

How long has it been since you took off your cape? Pshh.

That's not relevant.

But it kind of feels like you went to Mewni and you never really came back.

I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but you haven't even asked about my Summer.

You've just been talking about yours.

Oh, no.

I'm the Croissant Girl.

- What? - Oh, Jackie, I'm so sorry.

Wha-what are you talking about? - Jackie, I'm going to make this up to you.

- Make what up? You're never going to hear me say "croissant" again.

[slurps]

[spills]

[laughing]

- What? - You look so fancy.

Okay, okay.

[clears throat]

Jackie Lynn Thomas, I'm here to take you on the ultimate date.

- Wait, seriously? - I'm done with Mewni, see? No cape.

- I'm back, and I'm here for you.

- Me, huh? Well, can you guess what I want to do right now? Oh, Jackie, you know I'm not good at this game.

- Read my mind, Marco.

- Uh Okay.

You want to go to Seashell ville? Shell Town? Shellville? Necklace Land.

Necklace Land? Necklace Land! Shells? Seashell? Seashell Land? Shelly.

Mike and Shelly.

You want to go to Mike and Shelly's house.

No, dude, we're here.

Ohh, the pier! Okay, see, I-I never would have gotten that from a seashell.

So, what exactly are you supposed to do - on the ultimate date? - Ohh! How about I win you this cute dog thing.

Ha! Yeah, these guys kind of look like you.

One dozen balls, please.

What? - [grunts]

This thing is rigged.

- Let me try.

[bell ringing]

- Sweet! - How did you do that? Grand prize for the lady.

- This is the best day of my life.

- Marco.

[bird squawks]

Can you believe this is almost our three month-a-versary? Yeah, we're like an old married couple.

But we were doing long distance for, like, half the time.

Don't think I wasn't jealous of that cute lady mime.

- Hey! Oh, n Aww.

- Here, have some of mine.

Aw, thanks.

That's amazing of you, but I could actually go for some real people food.

How much cash do you have on you? I don't know $650? [both laughing]

Whew, okay.

Is there anything on the menu we haven't ordered yet? There's that guy.

[gurgling]

- No, I can't eat him he looks so sad.

- We can fix that.

[comical accent]

Hey! What do you a-think you are doing-ah? Run! [both laughing]

Hey! Give it back here-ah! - Ohh! - Oh, no! [both panting]

Wow, he didn't even say goodbye.

Not even a little claw wave or something.

- Dude, it's a lobster.

- Oh.

- What are you thinking about? - Lobsters.

We saved one, but we could have saved them all.

Do you want to go back for them? I kind of do, though.

Freedom to lobsters! Death to fancy restaurants! Oh ho ho! Yeah! Whoo! [laughing]

I finally feel like I'm back on Earth.

- Is that a good thing? - It's a great thing.

[soft grunt]

There's no place I'd rather be.

Take off your shirt.

- Huh? - What? Just do it.

- [nervous chuckle]

But now? Why? - It's just a - Huh.

- What? How did that get in there? Let's talk.

Okay, I know this looks bad, but I'm fine.

I can take it off anytime I want.

[sighs]

Look, today was awesome, and it's really sweet that you're trying, but if you're forcing yourself to stay in Echo Creek just so I'll be happy, then we'll both end up miserable.

You do see that, right? So, I figure now's a good time to give you an out.

I want to make this work.

You're my best friend, Jackie.

Mmm.

Oh, Marco.

[kiss]

We both know that's not true.

Stay amazing, okay? [music]

[sniffles]

Well, I now release you from the bonds of academia.

Be free.

Uh uh something like that.

We've never sent a kid to another dimension before.

Sure you have.

It's just like what started when she did her exchange program Just, you know, in the opposite direction.

Well, I hope I'm not sending you off to your death.

Marco, hold on! You can't leave yet! We want to say sorry for how we acted the other day.

No, guys, I'm the one who needs to say sorry.

- I-I really haven't been around much, and - Dude, it's okay.

Look, we-we brought you something.

It's our lucky die.

It'll grant you good fortune on your travels.

Aw.

Thanks, you guys.

For the record, I'm still mad at you.

I know.

But I got you something.

[weeping]

I'm gonna miss you so much! [chuckles]

I'm gonna miss you too, man.

I also got something for you.

Wha what?!?! How long have you had this? Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to.

[sighs]

What a creep.

Well, I guess this is goodbye, guys.

I don't understand.

We're just letting Marco leave school? Is this even legal? Shh.

Marco needs to have his own French summer.

What? What is happening? - Bye-bye, Marc! - Bye, Marco! - Bye! - Bye-bye! [Music]

# She's a princess winning battles # Through the break of dawn Don't worry when it's night 'cause She will keep the lights on Oh, there goes a shining star - # Evil won't deter her # - # No, sir! # - # 'Cause magic flows through her # - # Star Butterfly! # She is a shining star