01x09 - Auschwitz

[bunniefuu]

(WIND BLOWING)

(GROANING)

(SHUDDERING)

Viktor.

Viktor.

Wake up, Viktor.

(YELPS)

You were having a nightmare.

Didn't you read my book?

I said not to wake the person up.

(GASPS)

(BREATHES HEAVILY)

(METAL SCRAPING)

(SCRAPING CONTINUES)

(CHAIN RATTLES)

Sharper than it looks.

I mean, a little.

Good.

And it's perfectly normal

to want to k*ll a patient that's
leaving therapy prematurely.

(CHUCKLES)

CHARLIE: Your dream.

(SIGHS)

Auschwitz.

Viktor Frankl is lying there,
having a nightmare.

Remember what he said not
to do, in his book?

Reality is worse than a nightmare

when you're in Auschwitz...
Don't wake him up.

I woke him up.

Maybe the dream is trying to say...

the human spirit can prevail.

You should keep working,
keep being a therapist, no matter what.

How's it saying that?

I don't know. That's in his book.

Or maybe it's telling me,
don't die like a f*cking sheep.

Sam!

(LOUDER): Sam!

I know it's early.

I'm sorry to wake you up,
but there's some things

that we need to discuss.

We need to talk before you go to work.

Please sit.

I don't think that you should go
to see a new therapist.

Sometimes it's true, a patient
needs to try somebody else.

But sometimes it is a way
of running away.

And I think that
is what is happening here.

And I think we're making real progress.

You are opening up more
than you ever did before.

You are trying to contain your impulses,

even if we haven't found
anything that works yet.

I know things are getting
worse right now.

It's part of the process.

It's where the cliché comes from,

things get worse before they get better.

I've come to care about you, Sam,

as I always do with my patients.

You and I have developed a relationship.

No matter how strange the situation is,

that's the bottom line.

Therapists and patients develop
genuine feelings.

I know there are feelings, but...

(SIGHS)

I told you, it's not working.

And I'm going to see
Mr. Buchella next week.

That still gives us a week.

Let's see what we can accomplish, hmm?

At least send you off to him
in the best shape we can.

I know what you're trying to do.

(SNORTS) Of course, I'm a human being.

I don't want you to get another
therapist and then k*ll me.

(CHUCKLES)

Sam, you can leave this room
at any time,

you are not chained to the floor,
but I have some things to say.

(SIGHS)

I am going to tell you
about a man named Viktor Frankl.

He was a psychiatrist in Austria
in the s and ' s.

He survived the n*zi
concentration camps,

and he wrote a book called
Man's Search for Meaning.

And his main point is that

people need meaning in their lives,

probably more than anything else.

And I think that is a way
for you to take your next step.

So, the deepest place
that we can find meaning

is in relationships.

We all need friends and romance,
people to be close to.

For everyone, that's what fills us up.

That's what makes life good to live.

And without it,
anyone can go to dark places.

(SIGHS)

So, like Mary.

Yes, like Mary.

When I was with her,
I didn't feel any different.

I understand, but you're changing now.

If you had a girlfriend now,
I bet it would be different.

For some reason, I'm just, I'm not...

I'm not great at meeting women.

How did you meet Mary?

We went to high school together.

We were, like, friends, kind of.

And then my mom went to her
for physical therapy

when she broke her wrist,

and Mom gave her my number.

That's good.

Obviously, when she called,
you handled it well.

Maybe you're better with women
than you think.

What attracted you to Mary?

(SIGHS)

I, I... can we not talk
about Mary, please?

ALAN: Why?

She didn't want the marriage to end.

But she didn't know if I loved her.

Loved loved her.

Maybe I could get
some meaning from Hara.

Our kid in Bangladesh.

Mary and me would lie in bed

sometimes and she would pretend
that we were all together.

Us and Hara.

Mm-hmm, that sounds nice.

But then, other times,
if she didn't understand

or agree with something that
I was trying to say to her,

she would... get really upset.

She... did I tell you she
complained all the time?

She wasn't...

Wasn't what?

I don't know.

Maybe she didn't have
enough meaning in her life.

I wish I could meet her.

Why?

If I could see the two of you together,

I could help figure out

if this is the right direction
for you to go in.

Therapists can figure out what
two people go best together?

It's hard to predict
what couples will work.

But sometimes we can make
a pretty good guess

about what won't work.

Mm.

This is going to sound kind of strange.

But I wonder, is there a way
that I could meet her?

I mean, not in person, but...

On the phone?

Yeah, maybe, or...

(SCOFFS)

Maybe you could have her over

for lunch or dinner, upstairs.

You could leave the door open,
talk loudly.

That's a terrible idea.

(STAMMERS) Yeah, yeah.

Or, you know,

my daughter, with her kids,
had this nanny cam.

And she could see and hear everything

that they were doing in their room.

Maybe you could get one of those.

And I could watch
and hear you two interacting.

And then I could give you
my professional opinion.

That feels like it would be...

not honest.

It's normally not healthy
to spy on another person,

especially someone you are trying

to explore a trusting relationship with.

But these are extreme circumstances.

Hmm.

Mom?!

Can you come down here?

- (DOOR OPENS)
- (FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

I'm inviting Mary over for brunch.

What?

I'm inviting Mary over for brunch.

Dr. Strauss wants to meet her,
he's gonna watch on a nanny cam.

I'm not sure I...

You want Mary to come over?

I was telling Sam he needs
to develop more relationships

in order to expand the meaning
in his life.

I think that kind of meaning
can start to help take the place

of his problematic obsessions.

But... Mary?

- Shouldn't it be someone new?
- Maybe.

But my thinking is,
he's already gotten very far

in his relationship with Mary.

And at this point, he
has a strong need to...

SAM: She's coming.

Tomorrow at : .

Well...

I always liked Mary.

(METAL SCRAPING)

(SIGHS)

CHARLIE: You already got Elias k*lled.

That wasn't totally your fault.

But if Sam chokes Mary to death?

That's a hundred percent on you.

What do you want me to do?
I'm not the Terminator.

I s*ab him with this bullshit
half-Kn*fe,

what, is he just gonna lie down
on the floor and bleed out?

I'll be lucky if I get one good jab in.

But with Mary upstairs, I can s*ab him,

scream, and she'll call the police.

Him going for this is a f*cking miracle.

It's a gift from God.

Except you're assuming,
when you s*ab him

with your foot cream tube
and scream for help,

his mom won't just whomp Mary
over the head with a frying pan.

Right, that's what I'm assuming.

A Hail Mary with Mary.

Can you hear me?

I can hear!

They didn't have these
when my kids were babies.

- Dr. Strauss.
- Mm.

You're not gonna...

You probably think that I wouldn't
hurt Mary because I care about her.

And that's true.

But if-if you did something stupid

and she found out
that you were down here...

if you created a situation where
I had no other choice, I...

Sam, my only goal

is for this brunch date
to go well for you.

What are you serving?

Indian from Maruti.

Mmm, does Mary like Indian?

No, not that much.

I... you know, Sam,
I would encourage you

to think about what she might
like to eat.

You're the host, and you want
her to have a good time, right?

Yeah.

That's a good idea.

What do I say to her?

Well... you guys used to talk, right?

Yeah.

Would you be comfortable
trying some role-play?

That's where you practice
a situation that you're going to be in.

I can play the part of Mary,

and we could just try
to have a conversation.

Like a real, like a real conversation?

Yes.

Why don't you try saying,
"How have you been?"

How have you been?

How, how have, how have you...
How have you been?

How have you been?

Pretty good, how about you?

Pretty good, pretty good.

Pretty good, I've been pretty,
I've been pretty good.

I've been pretty good... Can I be Mary?

Uh... sure, yes.

Let's try that.

It's so good to see you again,
Mary, how have you been?

Pretty good, how about you?

Um, I've been doing okay.

A lot going on at work.

How are things going at work for you?

Pretty good.

I don't want to do this.

Dr. Strauss.

If...

If Mary and I had a baby...

...would it be like me?

Nobody knows how their kids
are going to turn out, Sam.

♪♪ ♪♪

♪♪ ♪♪

♪♪ ♪♪

(GRUNTING)

(DEEP BREATH)

(SILVERWARE CLINKING)

This is the, uh,
Waldorf salad from Milo's.

Oh... I love that.

But you didn't have to get me
something special.

You get gas when you eat Indian food.

(SAM SIGHS, CLEARS THROAT)

(GRUNTS)

(SIGHS DEEPLY)

Mm.

The salad's great.

Mm.

A Jew was sentenced to death.

A British guy says...

No, he's French. French guy.

A French guy said to k*ll him
with the guillotine.

He's... he's sentenced to death, too.

That's the... they're all...
So the British guy...

There's another British guy
there, and...

The British guy... sentenced to death...

he wanted to be sh*t

in the head, he says,

"Uh, sh**t me."

So they sh**t him in the head.

And the Jewish guy... They said, "How?"

They said, "How?"

And then the Jewish guy says, "Old age."

(SIGHS)

I'll be right back.

CANDACE: Some more tea?

MARY: Oh, no, I'm good, thank you.

- (DOOR OPENS)
- (FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

CANDACE: I have all these kinds of tea.

A whole cabinet.

I don't even remember buying it all.

(QUIETLY): It's going really bad.

I don't, I don't know what to say.

I think you should try asking
her a question.

Either what's going on at work,
or how's her family?

Okay.

CANDACE: How are your parents, Mary?

MARY: Normal, I guess.

Why is this so hard?

It just is. It's hard for everyone.

CANDACE: Your dad okay?

MARY: Yeah, he's doing okay.

He's not walking like he used to.

Mom thinks he needs cataract surgery.

At our age, it all goes wrong

one thing at a time,
but I'm sure he'll be fine.

MARY: Yeah, that's what
he says... "It'll be fine."

But then we'll be, like,
in the middle of dinner...

You're gonna get that girl k*lled.

CANDACE: It's easy
to take it for granted.

(CHOKING)

MARY: I've been trying to exercise more.

CANDACE: Good for you.

I should get back up.

MARY: It's so boring.

You don't like the lox and bagels?

CANDACE: I wish.

One day.

I'd rather have Indian.

Okay. I might need more advice.

MARY: You know that pill that
stops you from having a heart att*ck?

There are all these people

who just eat whatever they want,
don't exercise,

and then they take
these pills called statins.

CANDACE: Maybe that should be plan B.

- (SIGHS DEEPLY)
- MARY: Probably.

Heart att*cks...
They don't really scare me

too much, though.

Strokes, on the other hand.

I don't think it runs in the family,
but, well, who knows?

(SAM SNIFFS)

So, how have you been doing
at work lately?

Good.

Um, do you remember Carolina?

Mm.

She left about two months
ago, and they haven't replaced her,

so I'm doing everything.

SAM: Are they going to replace her?

They haven't even listed
the position yet.

You're gonna have to keep
doing all of her work.

That's not fair.

Yeah, well, fair...

You're never going
to believe this, but...

I kind of miss the La-Z-Boy.

(ALL CHUCKLING)

It's very comfortable.

- Hmm.
- Yeah.

I could, I could bring it back

- if you want.
- Oh, no, that's okay.

- No?
- No.

MARY: I have other good
chairs, and the couch.

That chair was his father's.

My father b*at me up a lot.

When I was a kid.

That's why I went into therapy.

MARY: Oh...

Sam.

MARY: So, my parents got a new cat.

The old one, well, he's not old...

Let me help you with that,
and then I need to get home.

CANDACE: No, no,
dear, just let me do it.

Help, Mary, I'm Sam's prisoner
down here!

Call the police! Help!

SAM: So, uh, okay, let
me walk you to your car.

(CHAIN RATTLING)

(ENGINE STARTS)

Mary left.

She said

she thinks it's good for exes
to have a friendly relationship.

And she thinks that we should do
this once a year.

What are you feeling?

Mary's not going to get
back together with me.

How does that make you feel?

Bad.

Sad.

That was a mistake,
her coming here was...

Why did you have me do that?

ALAN: N-No, that's wrong.

It wasn't a mistake.

This is very important for you.

To find meaningful relationships.

It means taking risks and getting hurt.

Then taking another risk
and getting hurt again.

Until you find relationships that work.

And that is exactly what life requires.

- I don't feel good.
- Yes, that's part of it.

And that pain is telling you something.

You've been following it
in the wrong direction.

But now that you're getting
to know yourself better,

it will tell you where you need to go.

I promise.

It doesn't matter.

I'm going to see Mr. Buchella next week.

What are you going to tell him?

I'll tell him the same stuff I told you.

But hopefully it works with him.

ALAN: You know...

in therapy, Sam, you can't push people.

You have to let them come to
their own insights in their own time.

That being said, I would suggest
and encourage you

to talk with Mr. Buchella specifically

about what your father did to you.

I told you all about my father.

It was the first thing that I told you.

- That is true.
- Mm-hmm.

But you had trouble giving me details.

It was hard for you to tell me
a really full story.

And for you to go forward
with Mr. Buchella

or anyone, I think it is very important

that you try to access

those memories and those
deeper feelings about him.

I don't have any trouble
accessing my memories

or my feelings. I remember everything.

You, you think that I don't remember?

I think about it all the time,
I think about...

every time he hit me,
every time he looked at me,

the way he looked at me,
the way he hated me.

What the f...

This, this... Sam,
what's happening right now,

how you're feeling...

(SIGHS) When you get so
angry that you hurt someone,

that's a version of what's
happening in this exact moment.

And at the root of it is your
father, as we've discussed.

It's not the people you hurt
that you're mad at, it's him.

So you-you think that I k*ll
people because of him?

Almost instead of him.

Oh.

I get it.

(TYPING)

This is a guy named Edmund Kemper.

He is the one guy who I feel,
he's the only one.

Just, just watch this.

KEMPER (ON VIDEO):
It was springtime, it was April.

Uh, for two months I hadn't k*lled.

And I said it's not going
to happen to any more girls.

It's got to stay between
me and my mother.

That was one week
before I m*rder*d my mother.

I said, she's got to die, or
girls like that are gonna die.

And that's when I decided
I'm going to m*rder my mother.

In his case, he said publicly
that it was his mother

that he was k*lling all along.

And when he k*lled his mother,
that was the end.

It's a very deep
psychological observation

from himself. It may be very accurate.

Got on the telephone
and turned himself in.

He said it was time
for the k*lling to stop.

I came out of her vag*na, see?

I came out of my mother.

And in a rage I went right back in.

I cut off her head.

And, and I humiliated her corpse.

He f*cked her skull.

It had to stop, it had to stop.
Uh, once my mother was dead,

there was almost a cathartic
process at that point.

- I got physically...
- See?

Kemper said everyone he k*lled,

he was just k*lling his mother
over and over again... me, too.

It's the same for me,
just with my father.

- I don't think that this...
- You're the one who said I k*ll people

instead of him, so if I k*ll
him, I'll be done.

- I won't have to k*ll any other people.
- Sam.

And if there's one person,
one person who needs

to get what he deserves,
it's that piece of sh*t.

ALAN: Sam!

Sam, you cannot and must not
k*ll your father.

This is good.

I feel like... I finally know
what I have to do.

Sam, we, we should keep talking.
We need to keep talking, Sam.

I'm gonna k*ll my father,

cut his head off, and f*ck his skull.

I'm just kidding, I'm not
going to f*ck his skull.

(GATE CREAKS, CLANGS)