04x18 - Mama Star/Ready, Aim, Fire!

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Star vs. the Forces of Evil". Aired: January 18, 2015 – May 19, 2019.*
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Series follows the adventures of Star Butterfly, the young turbulent heir to the royal throne in the dimension of Mewni, who is sent to Earth to mellow her reckless behavior.
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04x18 - Mama Star/Ready, Aim, Fire!

Post by bunniefuu »

It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from around here I'm from another dimension Gonna get a little weird Gonna have a good time I ain't from around here I'm from another Whoo-hoo! Yeah! I'm talking rainbows I'm talking puppies Fa-fa-fa-fa Fa-fa-foo! It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from around here I'm from another dimension Golly, I'm excited.

I haven't had a chimichanga since I lost my molars in 1988.

Whoa.

I wasn't even alive in '88.

Here you go.

- Oh, boy! [gasps]

- [rumbling]

- [people gasping]

- [rumbling stops]

[chuckles]

Strange weather, huh? But nothin' calms the nerves like a nice chimi - [rumbling]

- [both gasping]

Well, how do you like that? You know, this place was built on a tar pit.

Maybe you ought to check that there isn't a tar geyser bubblin' in the basement.

[chuckles]

- Good thinking, old chick.

- Now, wait a second.

What about my Oh, there you are.

- Glittery mad sparkle piano! - Hi, Star! [screams]

Where is she? Exploding incandescent wrecking ball devastation! I got a got a box of garbage meat.

Put it in the hole, Tom.

[Marco]

So, if this is the magic well, it's leading to these boats traveling here [Star]

Try another malevolent expl*si*n! - [splash]

- Yeah.

That's it! Star, if the magic well connects Earth and Mewni, then what if the first Mewmans were actually humans? Marco! Less talky, more trashy! Sparkling landfill garbage geyser! [Oskar]

Star? Hey, I didn't know you worked at Britta's Tacos.

She doesn't, you clod.

Uh, so if you don't work here, then what are you doing in the basement? Look, Oskar, we're kind of in an emergency-type situation here.

See, I need to get home, and the only way home is down that well and through a big ol' magic Slip 'N Slide that makes ya lose your mind if you're in it too long.

So I'm trying to call my daughter, my unicorn daughter, because she stays sane in the magic, and she can guide us through in one piece.

So we're throwing garbage down the well to get her attention.

Garbage? Oskar, please, try to keep up! My unicorn daughter is a total neat freak.

Don't know where she got that from.

But the garbage we throw down the well will bring her to us.

Huh.

Well, how about the meat cooler? I bet your unicorn daughter wouldn't be able to ignore that big boy.

[grunting]

Stop throwing garbage in here.

Firstborn! Thank goodness.

You gotta listen.

We need you to take us into the well that leads to Mewni.

Every time you come in here, you sour this place.

I cannot help you.

Goodbye.

So what do we do now? Well, we don't do anything.

Looks like I gotta just drive in there and hopefully make it back to the Mewni well before I lose my mind.

What? No way.

You're not going in there by yourself.

- We're going together, Star.

- Yeah.

Together.

[all screaming]

No.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Thanks for letting us borrow your car, Oskar! What are you doing? You have to go.

The last time you were here, you caused a major problem for me.

Bee-oop! Okay, look, here's the deal.

You're my daughter, so you have to do what I say.

I need you to lead us through the magic to the Mewni well.

And if you don't, do you really want four goo-goo-brained teenagers who've lost their minds running around down here? Yeah.

That's right.

We're teenagers.

We're great at causing problems.

If you want to go back to Mewni, then I'll send you back to Mewni.

No! No, no.

Don't do the zappy thing.

We all have to go back together.

Now, be a good daughter unicorn and pull us to the Mewni well.

And no more complaining.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

Huh.

I must be crazy.

Now, I can't have any monkey business, so just to be safe, I'm setting the child lock.

- [lock clicks]

- [scoffs]

Star, give us a little credit.

Nuh-uh.

I can't risk any of you guys getting out of the car.

This place does crazy things to your mind, and if you were to wander off, you'd be done for, trust me.

Now, come on.

Let's just sit back and enjoy the ride.

[Tom]

It is pretty cool.

Hey, guys? What are these things? Uh, that's just a tennis b a tennis b Uh - Hi.

- Hi.

Oh, boy.

It's already starting? All right, say goodbye to your memories, people.

What? It's kicking in already? But I'm not ready! Looks like somebody can't handle his magic.

- [both chuckle]

- Newbie.

Marco, my man, sit back and relax.

Just let it wash over you.

What am I doing here? I didn't want this.

Tom gets what he wants.

Gets to go home.

Janna gets to be weird.

[sighs]

I don't get to have what I want.

You don't even know what you want.

Yes, I do.

I want, I w I want I want I want to be to be very small.

And I want you uh, I want you to put me in your pocket, and I want to stay there, and you can just reach in whenever you want and just pat me on the head.

- Because I love you, Star.

- What'd you just say? [laughs]

What? [screams]

That guy's got three eyes! I do? [exclaims]

Get it Get it Get it Get it off! Get it off! It's all right.

It's all right.

Marco, be cool, man.

That's just Uh, what's your name again? Why, it's, uh Oh, man! I have no idea! Whoa.

Cool.

All guys should have three eyes.

[groans]

I want to go outside! We're not supposed to! But I can't remember why.

Maybe we're in time-out.

I mean, we must've done something bad, 'cause we're stuck in this dirty, stinky place, and it is so pretty out there! [shrieking]

[all screaming]

It has so many legs! [gasps]

Oh, my gosh, what if.

.

what if that thing is holding us prisoner? You gotta run that thing over.

- Oh, do it, do it.

- Sounds good.

Oh! But I don't remember how to make the box move.

Trying to remember! Relax! [exclaims]

[all laughing]

I can't tell if I wanna hug it or eat it.

[screams]

What is that? - [grunts]

- Watch it! [all laughing]

- Do it again.

- [laughing continues]

Stop this at once! We almost got it! Stop! - [all exclaim]

- Behave, or I will turn this thing around, so help me We have nearly reached the Mewni well.

Just sit still and [gasps]

- [all grunt]

- Where'd she go? Maybe she's in that purple stuff we're sitting in.

Huh.

I'm bored.

Hey, let's go do something fun.

Oh, I love fun! - Let's do that.

- Okay.

[shouts]

[altered voice]

Wow.

I am so sorry for that.

I just blew up.

I didn't even know I could do that.

Oh, boy.

I'm still on fire.

There's gotta be an "off" switch somewhere here, right? Let's go play.

[all grunting]

Let me go! - [gasps]

- Oh, hello.

Hey, could you help us? We don't know how to get out of these things, and he's on fire.

I can't figure it out.

[gasps]

The Mewni The Mewni Well is just ahead! [gasping]

Go.

Go now, before he gets [all grunting]

Oh! The button makes the rope-y thing let go! - [laughing, exclaiming]

- Hey, guys, wait for me! Hey, guys, wait for me! [both laughing]

Whee! You're fun.

[chuckles]

You're fun too.

[together]

I like you.

[high-pitched voice]

Excuse me.

I'm lost.

Have you seen my family? I don't know where they went.

No.

I'm sorry.

But maybe we can be your family.

I'd like that.

[giggles]

Okay! Aw! I love our little family! Mama, I'm hungry.

Well, eat up, champ.

You need to grow up big and strong.

[chuckles]

Whoa! - High five.

- [snarling]

Aw! Whew! It is hot in here.

I'm so happy.

Can we have a thousand babies? You can have those, but this one's mine.

[snarling]

Come here! Mm! Looks like you got another one on the way.

So this is where babies come from.

Yeah.

It's okay.

Come to Mama.

- [snarling]

- You're a big baby.

[screeching]

- Wow, you guys play rough.

- [groans]

No.

It doesn't want to play.

It's sole purpose is destruction.

[snarling]

Oh, I think they just want to play.

- See? - [shrieking]

You must leave.

I'm sorry.
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