04x21 - Cleaved

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Star vs. the Forces of Evil". Aired: January 18, 2015 – May 19, 2019.*
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Series follows the adventures of Star Butterfly, the young turbulent heir to the royal throne in the dimension of Mewni, who is sent to Earth to mellow her reckless behavior.
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04x21 - Cleaved

Post by bunniefuu »

[upbeat music plays]

It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from round here I'm from another dimension Gonna get a little weird gonna have a good time I ain't from round here I'm from another dimension You're gonna destroy the magic? Is that even possible? I'm pretty sure if I say the whispering spell inside the magic, then, poof! Star, wait! Hey, Hekapoo, I need you to open the portals.

I'm destroying the magic.

Yeah, sure.

Blow it up.

Wait, Hekapoo, you're made of magic.

Look, if I'm being honest, I always had the feeling the stuff did more harm than good.

Wait, Star [stutters]

What if we all go and fight Mina together? I mean, we've never done that before.

- Right, Moon? - Yes.

Three queens fighting for the good of Mewni.

No, Mom.

No.

I know what I need to do.

Come on, Marco.

Hey, I don't have a w*apon and that place is really dangerous.

Why don't you use that big mole of yours? - Ow! - That thing really packs a punch.

[groans]

I'm gonna miss her.

- [grunts]

- Marco! Oh, come on! It's the last time I get to use this thing.

You've used that before?! Are you ready? Uh, wait.

Ready.

Are they? Aww! [whistles]

OK.

Time to destroy some magic.

Just gotta get in and out and not lose my memory.

[chewing]

Marco Are you eating pudding? Yeah! Glossaryck gave it to me, and now I can't stop eating the stuff! [sighs]

I'm gonna miss your weirdness.

- What? - Nothing.

Time for the Come on, you got this.

Time for the whisper, whisper Get out.

[laughing]

You don't have any skin.

Star, you need to keep it together! Wait, how am I still fine? [gasps]

Star! Oh, hey, what's your name? Marco! What's your problem? The pudding! The pudding keeps your mind sharp! [exclaims]

Glossaryck! Why? Why doesn't he just tell us these things?! [grunts]

You got any more? [chuckles]

Down goes the zipper.

- [screeching]

- [both gasp]

[Star]

Wait a minute.

Is that Tom? Has he been trapped in the magic this whole time?? Go! You gotta destroy your family's legacy! Leave Tom to me! OK, but please, just be careful.

And come find me after! All right, just do it like Star would.

Cupcake blast! All right, Eddie, do your thing! Right.

Let me just brush up on my gator.

[screeching]

So, River.

Did you come here to take that big butthead on one last fishing trip? Actually, we came here to heal him in the magic sanctuary.

Which I probably shouldn't have told you about.

Shh.

Eddie! No, no, that's [indistinct]

danger! She could be in there right now! And I should stop talking.

[chuckles]

The magic sanctuary.

Change of plans.

Pull it out of the water, fellas! [Star]

OK.

All right, magic.

This is for the best.

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic.

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic [continues whispering chant]

[grunts]

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic.

Why won't you work! [yells]

[Moon]

Star? Please, stop.

No, Mom.

Magic needs to be destroyed! I know.

You're right.

The age of queens and magic needs to end.

But you don't need to end it by yourself.

I know I have a lot to make up for.

But, please, let's just end this together Hello! Who are you? [coughs]

Pudding? Yeah, magic's weird Wanna blow it up? Narwhal Blast! [gasps]

Aw, man Star makes magic look so easy.

What would she do right now? Ah! Mixed Martial Arts Rainbow Thing! [horse whinnies]

Kitten b*mb! [meowing]

Tom, please, just eat your pudding! Your friend is gone, he's one with magic now! No! He just needs to remember! [grunts]

Gotcha! [groans]

[yells]

[grunts]

[grunting]

Oh, what? What is? [whinnies]

Marco! What is happening? Oh, dude, are you OK? [groans]

Yeah.

I I think so.

Hey, Marco [both gasp]

Where's it going? After Star.

Come on.

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic.

[all]

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic [continue chanting]

Oh, would you look at that! Oh, my! [chuckling]

[babbling]

Oh, darling! You look beautiful! [all]

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic.

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic.

Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic Break the bond, tear the fabric, cleave the stone, stop the magic [gasps]

Oh [chanting continues]

Excellent work, my warriors.

Now, cr*ck that sanctuary wide open.

Huh? [chanting continues]

Playing a little game of hide and go seek? Well, ready or not, here comes Mina! [chanting continues]

[exclaims]

It's working! Whoa, whoa! Is this the realm of magic? Hiding in the magic.

Clever queens.

Mother! I found you! Queen Solaria! What are you doing with these monster smoochers? [yells]

Solaria! Oh, help me! My queen! Solaria! [grunts]

Well, that takes care of Mina.

Yeah, but, uh, what about that giant purple unicorn? No worries, Star.

We got this! [grunting]

[exclaims]

Tom! You're all right! And Marco! You just flipped a horse! Yeah, dude, you just flipped a horse.

I just flipped a horse! - [roars]

- The horse! Huh? [whinnies]

[laughing]

I can't believe you actually did it.

It looks like the age of magic is coming to a close.

- Well, for what it's worth - [cooing]

I think you made the right choice.

I'm proud of you, kid.

Glossaryck, what's what's going to happen to you? Well, a good captain always goes down with his ship.

[thunder rumbles]

Star! We need to go.

The portals are closing! [panting]

Star? OK, what's the plan? Uh, you have to go back through the Earth well! Yeah, OK, but what's the plan for seeing each other? There's a plan, right? Uh, yeah.

Yeah, of course.

Of course, there's a plan! But you gotta get going before we get stuck here! Star? [whimpers]

[sniffles]

[thunder rumbles]

- [sighs]

Bye, Star.

- Bye.

[Moon]

Star! [panting]

[coughing]

Star, I'm so sorry.

We need to get out of here! Star? I'm going to Earth.

I'm sorry, Mom.

No Star! [yelling]

[grunts]

The Earth well closed a while ago.

- But the kid's still here.

- Star? [gasps]

Marco! W-What are you doing here?! Well [chuckles]

guess the same thing as you.

[thunder rumbles]

So any idea what happens if we stay here? No and I don't care.

Because with or without magic We belong together.

[growling]

[Moon straining]

Come on [gasps]

Star! Hello! Up here! - [alligator growls]

- Yes! Wah! Wha-wah.

Star! Wake up! - Hiya! - [alligator growls]

Star Wake up, honey.

Wake up.

- Mommy? - Yes, baby.

Mm Are we on alligators? - Yes.

- Weird.

I had Marco, Mom.

I I was holding him.

I'm so sorry, my love.

[creaking]

Star look.

- [cheering]

- [Moon]

You did it.

Your plan worked.

We're all free from the magic now.

Hello, Star Butterfly! Hi, Buff Frog! C'mon, let's head in.

Hiya! [chuckles]

I'm free! Oh, where'd my muscles go? [grunts]

My favorite child! Are you OK? Yes, Daddy, I'm fine.

[babbling]

[Mina]

Hello [coughs]

[coughs]

Aw, dang it, my horsey-pony broke! Come on, you stupid [grunting]

Mina, just stop.

This is my fault.

Let me help you.

You're not well.

Ha! You wish this was your fault.

We swore our oath to Queen Solaria.

[grunts]

Y'know You can get rid of me.

It's so easy.

But the sweet thing is, I'll never really be gone, 'cuz I've got good ideas.

And the thing about good ideas is they tend to kinda hang around, like a bad fart! Toodle-oos, doormats! Bye, bye! Who's comin' with me? Oh! I'd like to come with you! - Where are we going? - Into the woods! [coughs]

I, uh, think I'll just stay here, it turns out I wasn't as hate-filled as I thought I was.

Star, I have so much to apologize for.

I don't even know where to begin or if it's even possible.

Mom, you messed up.

Big time.

And, usually, when a queen messes up in this family, bad things happen to them.

I mean, all Eclipsa did was fall in love and look what they did to her? Even though we aren't queens anymore, we still get to decide what kind of family we want to be.

And I want to be the kind of family where Moms mess up and we figure it out.

OK, that's enough.

No more crying.

I gotta go and check on my friends.

Oh, and Mom I think our cheek thingies are are gone.

[giggles]

Wow.

Wait, what? Bring me your face so I can examine you.

Say, Moon, did you do kindergarten for Star or did you go straight into sword combat? Uh A little of both, actually.

Huh I think that's what we'll do, then.

I think we need more young ladies like her.

Well, Ms uh, Head You're fine, you can go home now.

Finally.

This is great news, aren't you happy? Yes, very wonderful.

Hold on, one second.

Hey, Rich, what's up with all these birds, bro? Uh, this is my family.

They're concerned with my welfare.

OK, sir, uh-huh, but, like, do they live here now? [scoffs]

What? Of course not! Really? 'Cuz it looks like they do live here, because that one over there just got mail delivered, OK.

[squawks]

Hey, hey! [gasps]

B-fly! - Oh, Pony! - Mm Where's Earthturd? I I had to destroy the magic.

- You had to do what? - Yeah, here, look.

Narwhal Blast! - See, nothing.

No magic.

- Whoa.

It was the only choice I had.

I had to take the power away from those warriors.

And, then, when I did it, Marco got sent back.

So, did Kelly and her dog friend and bird-person, or whatever, get sent back home, too? I mean, at least that's what Glossaryck said OK, and that makes a lot of sense.

Uh OK, you know, Pony, Marco is gone! My friends are gone! I don't need your sarcasm, right now.

I need you tell me that they're gonna be OK.

OK, look, I'm your best friend, all right, so I'm gonna be straight with you.

Right now, if Kelly's home, she crying.

OK, I really don't need this right now.

No, she is.

Kelly is crying.

Crying big, beautiful tears of joy because she is riding her dog friend, and they're right in the middle of the most amazing battle quest ever! Get me in as close as you can! I'm on it! Ho-ho! [grunts]

- [all gasp]

- [grunting]

All right! [laughs]

Go on.

OK, and, so, you know that bird-person - His name is Talon.

- Mm, whatever.

That bird-person, right now, is at the Dragon Spit Tavern.

Yeah, he's bragging to a bunch of his weird friends about all the cool stuff he didn't do.

So, I looked at the queen and I says, "Talon don't ride for no kingdom.

Talon rides for Talon.

" Then I saved the kingdom and we totally kissed.

[laughing]

[gasps]

Wait! What do you think happens to those magic committee people if there's no magic? Oh, you mean the Magic High Commission? All right, last slice, who wants it? Omnitraxis? Rhombulus? Snakes? Nobody? I guess we'll never know.

[both laughing]

[sighs]

I'm still so sad about Marco.

Look, if you ended up safe back here on Mewni then he must be safe back on Earth.

And I guess that means that Janna's with him, too.

Aww, Janna! I love Janna.

- [exclaims]

There you are! - Tom! [groans]

Here we go again.

Didn't Ponyhead tell you I was looking for you? No didn't mention it.

Oh, right.

Star, Tom is looking for you.

Thank you, Ponyhead.

Hey, come outside with me.

You gotta see this.

Look.

[siren wailing]

You've had quite a day! Can you tell me where you were when that earthquake hit? I don't have to talk to you without a lawyer.

Do we get the rest of the day off? [panting]

Excuse us! Sorry, coming through! Where's my son? Marco! [yells]

I got stabbed by a unicorn! Uh Ok.

[man]

Ooh, are you Mom and Dad? Yeah, he keeps waking up and going, "I got stabbed by a unicorn!" - Where's Star?! - And then he says that.

He's a little delusional.

That should wear off.

Hm.

Well, why don't you come with me for a second? I'll be right back, sweetie.

Oh, my son is delusional! - [coos]

- I'm so glad you're OK.

[sighs]

Hey, wake up! [yelps]

Janna! - Are you OK? - Oh, yeah.

They gave me all the fixins: adjustable head rest, heart rate monitor.

Only thing that's a little weird, I have no idea what's going on.

What happened? Where's Star? She destroyed the magic.

So, I guess, she's on Mewni.

Oh Well, at least you got me as a friend.

- What? - Don't act so surprised.

You think I'm not as cool as Star or something? What? No, I just [chuckles]

Who am I kidding? No one is as cool as Star.

It's just nice to hear you say that we're friends.

Thanks.

[sighs]

- Hey! What are you doing? - Doing you a favor.

Might be the first time, actually.

What Hey, hey! Bap-bap-bap You're not supposed to be moving! I know how to drop my pulse to zero but only for 60 seconds.

Run! - [monitor flatlines]

- [gasps]

Whoa! What is going on?! What happened?! [all chattering]

Punch! [panting]

[horns honking]

Whoa, careful out there, Diaz.

That earthquake caused some kinda weird gas leak.

It's not a gas leak.

It's a portal.

Uh, I need your skateboard! [panting]

[music]

- Hey, Star Butterfly, wanna play? - Not now, Ludo! Do you think that's from the gas leak? It's not a gas leak, it's a portal! [panting]

C'mon! C'mon! C'mon, Diaz! C'mon! [grunting]

[expl*si*n]

No [sobbing]

[vehicles approaching]

What? [Star panting]

[music]

[horse whinnies]

[horn honks]

[yelling]

Hey, watch it! [laughing]

[laughing]

[yelling]

Down! Down, boys! Down! [whimpering]

Hey, watch it! [music continues]

- Hey.

- Hi.
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