03x27 - Lost Leader/League of Randalls

[bunniefuu]

[bell rings]

[children cheering]

Wa!

Umph!

Ah!

[burp]

All right, people.
this is Lava King.

I got visual contact.

You know the mission,
retrieve our lucky bat.

The Ashleys took it,
and now we're getting it back.

Move in!

Skunk in the hole!

So, I said what she said I said
about what she said

wasn't what I said she said!

Like, a skunk!
Run, Ashleys, run!

[all] Ew!

[all] Miss Finster!
Miss Finster!

Lava King, this is Lieutenant
General Vinegar Zeek Steel.

I'm in. Repeat. I'm in.

Perfect. Everything is going
according to plan.

Lava King, we got bogies A, B, Q
and T with big F and little R,

Coming in A.S.A.P.
at :.

What? That can't be.
They're early.

Get out, Gus. Now!

Huh? Why?
What's going on?

It's Finster!
Get out of there now!

Abort, abort!

[all] Ew!

[sniffs] Infestation, my foot!
Forget your skunk. I smell a rat.

Oh, no! Oh, no!

The rope, Gus!
Use the rope!

Huh?

She's going down!
Bail out!

Gus!

Gus?

Inspector came through
this morning, ladies.

Foundation, plumbing and
electrical are all up to code.

No duh, Construction man. But is it gonna,
like, fall down on us?

Not a chance. Those are the finest
steel-belted radials

daddy's money can buy.

Man, the Ashleys
steal our lucky baseball bat,

and Principal Prickly lets
them build a new clubhouse.

We try to take it back,
and what do we get?

a whole week of
after-school detention.

Unless we forget
Gus got a sprained ankle.

I'm sorry I let you guys down.
I shouldn't have panicked.

No, it was my fault. The Ashleys never
would have stolen the Slugginator

if I hadn't eaten their collectible
bath-soap assortment.

Hey, Mikey. It looked like candy.
It was a reasonable mistake.

Enough already! You guys
didn't let us down. I let you down.

Let's face it.
It's all my fault.

My planning days are over.

-[all gasp]
-That's crazy talk, Teej!

You're the best planner
in the history of planning plans.

No one is as meticulous
in their monkey shines as you.

You had Operation Justifiable Justice
worked out to the last detail.

Yeah, well, the last detail
was wrong.

Every tuesday morning,
on her doctor's orders,

Miss Finster takes five minutes to eat

a big bowl of Husky
Sunrise fiber-pellet cereal.

-Perfect time for an operation, right?
-Right

Wrong! Two nights before operation,
Finster got a catfish bone

-stuck between her teeth.
-So what?

So she got inflamed gums.

Nobody with inflamed gums eats
fiber-pellet cereal.

Its too darn crunchy.

She could wait and let
the milk make it soggy.

She's a working gal, Mikey.
She don't wait for cereal.

No, she went with
her backup food prunes.

One minute flat, then she's back out
patrolling the playground

four minutes ahead of schedule.

[gasps] And that's when it all
fell apart.

Because of me, Gus got hurt.

That's Ok, T.J. other people
have gotten me plenty hurt before.

-They get over it.
-Yeah well, they weren't me, Gus.

They weren't your buddy.

I don't know how,
but I lost my touch.

Maybe we'll have more
crazy, madcap adventures.

Maybe we won't
but from here on out,

I won't be the guy
thinking them up.

[Lawson] Hey, Quitweiler.

It's all over school that the Ashleys took
your lucky baseball bat,

and now you're quitting
on trying to get it back.

Well, ha ha!

Keep it moving, Lawson!

Wrong, Spinelli! Seems to me that now's
the perfect time

to challenge you to a game,

unless you're too scared
without your lucky bat.

We're never scared of you,
Lawson.

Then you're on tomorrow at recess.
Ha ha!

[kids] Ha ha!

That tears it! I don't lose to Lawson,
and I definitely don't lose

to the Ashleys.
We're getting that bat back.

But if we're gonna get it back,
we need another plan.

Now who might have
one of those?

Anything you come up with,
I'll be right behind you.

All right, the secret meeting of coming up
with a secret plan is now called to order.

Seeing how T.J. has decided not to come up
with any more plans,

we've all come up
with plans of our own.

That was five minutes ago,
Vince. I think we all remember.

Oh I know, but this is kind of like
an official meeting.

It just seems we ought to start stuff off,
I don't know, official?

Actually, if we really want
to be official,

now that our meeting
has been called to order,

parliamentary procedure
mandates

that we read the minutes
from the last meeting.

Last meeting? There was a last meeting?
Oh, man. I missed it!

There was no last meeting,
and we ain't reading no minutes.

I think we should begin with a cheerful
snack followed by the pledge of the legion

A snack?
But I didn't bring a snack!

Guys, guys!
You know what I think?

-What, Teej?
-Tell us!

-Please, T.J. tell us now.
-I think while you come up with a plan,

I'm gonna go keep lookout, just in case
our enemies try spying on us.

Great, alright. Let's just hear
each other's plans.

Alphabetical order.
Gretch?

Thank you, Spinelli. In the brief amount
of time allotted me, for plan hatching.

I devised a little something I like
to call Operation Ashleybot.

Using the technology I patented
while building our animatronic skunk,

I'll simply reconfigure the circuitry

and create lifelike renditions
of the Ashleys.

Scandalous! Scandalous!

-Scandalous!
-[all] Scandalous!

With my army of Ashleybots,
the real Ashleys won't stand a chance.

After all, who could the Ashleys blame
if they believe that they themselves

sneaked into their clubhouse
and stole back the Slugginator?

It's bold and cool.

Yes, and we could put this baby
to bed for just $. million dollars.

Perhaps we could hold
a bake sale?

-Gus? What you got?
-Well Spinelli, the way I see it,

I could ask my dad to use his good, old
army connections to lend us a little help.

[screaming]

Attention, Ashleys. Surrender our bat now,
or we will take it by force!

It's the perfect plan.

Isn't the army sort of too busy defending
the free world to inv*de the clubhouse?

Oh...Yeah!

-Mikey?
-My plan to retrieve our bat involves

careful planning, great stealth
and the element of surprise.

-As if!
-Totally as if!

Surprise!

[blows horn]

A pastry picnic from me to you.

[all] aw!

When confronted by my act of kindness,
the Ashleys will have no choice

but to give us back our bat,
perhaps with a note of apology.

Is he talking about the Ashleys
at our school?

Look, nothing personal, but none of these
ideas look like they're gonna work.

And now that I think about it
I kind of don't like my idea, either.

How about you, Spinelli?

I like my idea.
I'm just not sure it's legal.

We need a plan!

What we need is someone
who can devise a plan.

Yeah, what we need is T.J.

Oh, lost leader, where are you
when we need you?

You know what, guys? here we are,
talking about how much we need T.J.

Fact is, I think right now T.J. needs us.

But we already tried helping him.

Yes, unfurtonately, he's too angry
with himself to listen to us.

Well, if being mad at himself is his
problem, then I say we fix the problem.

But how are we gonna do that?

My friends, dare I say it?
I think I got a plan.

Then that's it. Everybody knows their job.
Let's do it!

Hey! Did you guys come up
with a plan to get back the Slugginator?

Each of us suggested an element of a plan.
Then we put each element to a vote

and devised a plan by committee.

Turns out when we work together,
we are the best planners ever.

First of all, T.J., without you in charge,
I don't have the heebie-jeebies

that some really dumb mistake
is gonna bust up all my bones.

Well, I guess that's good.
Um, what do I do?

Actually, we kind of rather
you weren't involved on this.

My heart quivers with fearat
the mere thought of your participation.

Yeah, T.J.
I mean, gee, you stink.

See ya later!

Huh? I stink?

All right, people. Ashley's clubhouse
is clear and...

Whoa! OK, here we go!

Operation Restore Order is a go.

[children yelling]

Ugh!

Four score
and seven years ago...

Oh, Ashleys! Imported mice!
Ashleys!

Hey! Gretchen, I've been looking
for you.

-Why, T.J., I wasn't expecting you.
-I bet you weren't.

But the fact is, I've been thinking
about how you guys talked to me,

a while ago back there.
And I'm ticked off!

-But, T.J. I...
-So what if I messed up,

and thing were better the last mission?
It's no excuse for you to go treating me

like I'm some kind of creep.

Um, T.J., I'm sorry, but we're
in the middle of a plan here.

A plan?

-Four score...
-You call that a plan? Give me that!

Listen up, guys. This is lava king,
and whether you like it or not,

I'm telling you, your plan looks dumb.

Mikey, take off those goofy wings
and assume lookout position to

the north of the clubhouse.

Spinelli, remove those leaves with
extreme prejudice and cover the south.

You got it, Teej!

[T.J.] Vince, release your mice
outside the Ashley clubhouse.

Gus, you go back to the drama club costume
shop and get yourself another costume

I got something a little less presidential
in mind for you.

[all scream]

-Mice!
-Ew!

Miss Finster!

[squealing]

[children] Ah!

Mice!

Holly, hornswoggled!

You really do have mice!

[all] Yeah! All right!

-We did it!
-Yes, we got it back!

Hang on, guys. Let's not gloat about
how good things are for us

and how bad things are
for the Ashleys

until we actually have
the Slugginator in our hands.

Did I hear someone mention
the Slugginator?

[all] Yeah!

Now it's official. We got the bat.

So tell me. Any of you guys still think
I stink?

Teej, I got to tell you.
We were just faking.

We didn't mean any of that stuff we said.
I had my fingers crossed.

We figured if you got mad at us,
you'd forget about being mad at yourself.

When you saw our pathetic
plan falling apart,

you wouldn't be able to stop
yourself from taking charge.

Not a bad little plan.

Face it, T.J.
You're a natural-born leader.

And hey, even naturals
make mistakes.

Remember that time
I almost struck out?

I remember.
Thanks, guys.

And speaking of that, there's still one
thing we got to take care of.

[glass shatters]

Oh, man! We lose!

Oh, man! I'm gonna get detention
all over again.

Not necessarily, Vin.
Would you believe I have a plan?

Why, hello, Miss Finster.
Resting the bunions indoors, are we?

What's this?
Tender!

-I just saw the June Box.
-Oh boy! The store June Box...

where Finster hides all the toys
she confiscates from kids

until school's over in June!

And I got a little plan under my cap
that will get those toys back

a whole lot sooner than June.

Not so fast, Teej. Something stinks around
here, and I think it's in that trash can.

Say, trash cans aren't supposed
to have feet.

OK, guys, who wants to play
kick the can?

No, don't kick!

-Then get your can away from us, Randall.
-Or else!

Man, a kid just can't mind
other people's business anymore.

Or can he?

So daddy takes me by the cosmetics counter
at Zoles department store

and buys up all
the Princess Pretty lip gloss.

So that's why I had to settle
for Lucy's lacy lip lather.

[all] Scandalous!

Just keep it coming, ladies.

Whoa!

-[all] Ew!
-Ew! It's a rat fink.

Get out!

Ah!

There is nothing lower
than a snitch.

[panting]

Ah, Miss Finster!

Ah, Randall. Just the boy
I was looking for.

Now, tell me, Randall,
what's that over there?

Uh...the Naughty Box?

Yes, Randall. And what do I like to see
that box filled with?

Ne'er-do-wells
and miscreants.

Ne'er-do-wells
and miscreants.

And what do you see
in there now?

Uh... Nothing.

Bingo! It's empty!

Just like the snitch reports
you've been handing me all week.

I trust you have something
a little more satisfying for me today?

I... um...

Just as I suspected.

Randall, it pains me to say it,
but you've hit the wall.

You've lost the touch.
You're off your game!

But I still get my cookie,
right?

I'm afraid not, Randall.
Snacks are for snitches.

She's right.
I am off my game.

[voice chatters]

Say, what's this?

The Tylers! I can always count on
the Ashleys' little brothers

for some moist, little morsels
from home.

Yeah, then my sister, Ashley Q said,
"duh, like not 'like' like like."

Does Ashley Q know
you know that?

Of course not. I was hiding in the mink
drawer of her Louis Quatorze wardrobe.

Hiding in a piece of furniture.
Um...

What a truly tantalizing tidbit
of Tyler tattletale technology.

Wait till you hear
the rumor I heard

curled up under Ashley B's
stuffed animals.

Howdy, Tylers.
what's the word?

Mum's the word
with you, Randall.

Thanks, guys. I couldn't help
overhearing you fellows talking.

and it seems to me I might just have a job
for boys of your, uh, small caliber.

Jobs? We don't need jobs.
We have investments.

By the way Tyler T, thanks for the tip
on Beefalo.

All right. If you don't
want to become spies...

Tylers, did he say spies?

[all] Notorious!

My uncle tippy
was a spy!

Peppy idea, Randall.
Count us in.

Excellent news, boys.
Let's get snooping.

[ticking]

[blows kazoo]

All right, gentlemen.
Let's see your reports.

I believe you'll find these
quite satisfying.

Yes, nice.
Very nice.

Moist! Moist and dewy.

All right, boys, you run along and see
what else you can find out.

Remember now,
you're undercover. Deep cover.

[all] Righty-o, Randall.

Heh-heh, I'm back.

-Hello, Miss Finster.
-Don't bother me, boy.

I'm busy scouting
for scofflaws, no thanks to you.

Well, then, I guess
you're not interested

in hearing how Gellman
climbed the slide backwards,

or how Kursh cut in line
for free flu sh*ts,

or how Sue Murphy are planning to--

Hold up there, boy.
What's gotten into you?

Did I do good, Miss Finster?

Good enough for a cookie.

If you like that,
there's plenty more in here.

Congratulations, my boy.
I'd say you're back on your game.

I better go round up
those rapscallions.

Back on my game, eh?

[blows kazoo]

Boys, I think it's time we showed
the playground the full power

of the league of Randalls.
Now let's get spying.

Did he just call us
Randalls?

[whistles]

[burp]

Ah, the perks of the spy trade.
Man, I couldn't eat another...

Greetings, Randall.

Drop something?

Oh! Hey, fellas.

Say, you put in a full day.
Why don't you knock off?

We know about the cookies,
Randall.

A tasty treat
for sleuthing snoops.

Yet our mouths remain
surprisingly empty.

-What are you getting at?
-It's just not good business, Randall.

Works pretty good for me.
[burps]

So we see.

Dont worry fellas, there was only
one cookie in that bag.

The rest of it was packaging.
Let's all go home and get some rest.

We've got a big day of spying ahead of us.
Ta-ta!

Phew! I am good.

[all yelling]

Snitch boy!

Hey, I really am good.

More kids in that box
than I remember.

[boys] This is
a royal outrage!

Oh, problems in the palace,
perhaps?

How long did you think you could get away

with bringing a secret toy
to school, Robert?

That's my King Bob action figure.
I use it to plot my reign.

Well, now you'll be plotting
from the box crowny boy.

Tattler, you did this to me.

Uh, no,
your royal fantasticness.

I would never snitch on King Bob.
That's just not good policy.

Maybe not for you.

But for us, I'd say
it's quite rewarding.

Hey! You guys snitched on King Bob?
But I didn't tell you to do that.

That's naughty.
But okay, I'll take the cookies.

Oh, no, you won't.

What? But you're
my league of Randalls.

I'm so sorry, Randall. I didn't hear you.
Tell it to the crest.

Huh? A big T?

Handsome stitching,
but what's it mean?

It signifies that we are no longer
a league of Randalls.

Now we are the league of Tylers.
And now we give the orders.

[whistle]

Keep moving!
You going to the box!

-Ow! That hurts!
-Stop it!

With the kindergartners' help, we'll soon
have control of the entire playground.

There's no way I'm letting you
move in on my territory.

-I'm telling Miss Finster!
-Randall!

Ah, Miss Finster, just
the grown-up I wanted to see.

Well, that's surprising.
because you're busted!

The Tylers tell me you've been skulking
in the hallways without a pass.

Tylers, here's a bag
of cocoa creamies.

Please don't throw me
in the box.

There's people on the inside
just waiting for me.

Should have thought
about that before you broke the law!

Oh, how could you turning your old pal
into Miss Finster.

Why, you boys are...

[all] Notorious?

Does everyone in your family
have a catchphrase?

That's enough questions, boy.
Come on. I'm taking you in.

What have I started?
What have I done?

I got to get T.J. and them
to help.

T.J. and them?
You're in the box, too?

I say this time we put you in
the garbage can feet last!

No, wait. It's not my fault.
It was the Tylers. They turned you in.

The Tylers? Spying?
But where did they get the know how?

Well, uh, I did give them
a few pointers.

Ew! You, like, turned our brothers
into snitches.

[all] Scandalous!

Oh, my, if Randall recruited the Tylers,

and they, in turn, recruited
the kindergartners

and this continues at the current
rate of exponential expansion.

Snitches will
take over the world!

Hold on, T.J.
Snitches will take over the world!

Then I say for the good of this big,
blue marble,

we got to put a stop to the Tylers.

-But how?
-Yeah, Teej, the Tylers are too powerful.

Don't worry guys.
I've got a plan.

But for it to succeed, we're
gonna have to work together.

Like, work?

Per T.J.'s instructions, I've rigged
each of the Ashleys

with a hidden microphone
that looks just like this.

Now all we have to do is wait
for the Ashleys to initiate conversation.

So, like, hello,
baby brother.

Bah, Ashley A. you never talk to me
like that.

-Like what?
-Like at all.

Well, now I want
to make it up to you.

[whinnies]

OK, phase two.
Randall, it's all up to you.

You know, T.J. It's been nice being part
of one of your schemes.

It's gonna hurt me
to tattle on you later.

Just get to it, fink boy.

Pst!
Hey, Tylers!

What is it, Randall?

Listen, I want to cut a deal
to reduce my box time.

You have our ear.

I just heard T.J. and his pals
have a secret tape

they're gonna play at
the dumpsters in five minutes.

And they say it's full of information
that's not just moist but notorious, too.

[all] Notorious?

This, my little chums,
ought to be good.

It will be the jewel
in our cookie-collecting crown.

Sh!
There they are now.

OK, Gretch,
let her roll.

[Ashley] Well, now I want
to make it up to you.

Galloping gossip!
That's my sister!

So, like, how are things
with Tyler Q?

[Tyler] Ha! Tyler Q is acting all A-ish
because he photocopied

the teacher's edition of the phonics book.

Hey! That was a secret!

I can't believe you betrayed
a fellow Tyler.

[Tyler Q] Oh, Ashley Q you wont believe it
Tyler T and Tyler B

have been practicing their times tables
with marked flash cards.

-Hey, that's you!
-You betrayed the Tyler crest.

Me? What about Tyler A?

[all arguing]

Come on, Tylers.
Like, break it up.

-Why should we listen to you girls?
-Yes, you set us up.

I did it, guys. For a good reason.

Yeah, somebody had to show you mugs
how snitching hurts everybody.

Just look how it ripped
the fabric of your friendship

seam by seam by seam by seam.

They're right. Tyler against Tyler
is wrong.

Gentlemen, our snitching days
are over.

I still have a bag of cookies.
What say we grab some milk

and go discuss our investments?

[all] You said it, Tyler!

Girlfriends, I have
never been so proud.

So, Randall, did you learn
anything at school today?

Yes, I did, Mikey. In fact, I'm learning
something extra moist at this very moment.

See ya, suckers!