08x05 - Dil Saver/Cooking with Phil & Lil/Piece of Cake

[bunniefuu]

[ whirring]

[ snoring]

Whoa!

[ whirring]

[ kids laughing]

[ dog barks]

[ giggles]

[ whirring]

[ squeals]

[ Dil squeals]

[ Dil giggling]

[ crash]

[ sucking]

We did it!

[ all cheer]

[ crash]

[ grunts]

Dil keeps wrecking our stuff.

I know.

He broke my favoritest toy
yesterday--

the one that goes "ding."

[ Angelica chuckles]

Good work, droolpuss.

Nah.

[ chomping]

[ grunts]

Ouch! Dil!

[ grunting]

Sometimes I wish
he would just go away.

[ thud]

My daddy told me once

if you wished hard enough
for things, they might happen.

Just from wishing?

I didn't know that.

[ chuckling and munching]

Hi.

Hey, thanks for watching
the kids while Didi's out.

Oh, coming here
with Lulu

is like going out
on a date.

Hey there,
little fella.

[ smacks lips]

[ chuckles mischievously]

I'm going to make sure Tommy
wishes he never made that wish.

[ music begins playing]

I don't like
to play in here.

Yeah, it's kind of dark

and it smells like
inside-out pockets.

[ door creaks open]

[ all shriek]

Hey, what are you scaredy-cats
doing in the closet?

Hiding from Dil

so he can't break our toys.

Dil's been acting
like a baby lately.

Where isDil?

Yeah, Tommy,
where is he?

Ever since
you wished he'd go away

it's like he disappeared.

But I only wished it
one time

because he was
getting all dilly

and I didn't really mean it.

[ laughs evilly]

See how gulliver they are.

Oh, we gots to find him.

Dil's got to be here somewheres.

If we need to check under
the whole world to find him

we will.

Follow me.

Cynthia, this is
almost too easy.

[ grunting]

I bet you're working
on a little something.

I'm ready for you, Tiger.

Whoops!

Oh...

[ grunting]

[ grunting from monitor]

Where the dickens
is that coming from?

That's a monitor
so you can hear a baby cry

when it's in its bedroom.

Well, you finally came up

with one dandy
invention, son.

I didn't invent
that, Dad.

What are you doing now?

I'm scanning
this photo of Dil

into my computer

so when I turn it on,
I'll see his face.

Wow! Now, that invention's
a doozy!

Not mine either, Dad.

You know, I think
I'll just go downstairs

to work on one
of my inventions.

Okey-dokey.

I think I'll go make myself
a prune juice spritzer.

[ Dil's coos emitting
from monitor]

Oh, Tommy, I think I found
your little bitty brother.

Chuckie:
Oh, wow! Dil's a dimmercial.

Neat, let's watch him.

He's not on TV.

He's trapped inside
the compooper.

How'd he get in there?

I bet Tommy knows.

It was his fault.

Was not!

Nobody gets disappeareded

just because somebody
wishes it.

Phil:
Yeah, Angelica.

You're still here.

You think Dil just got in
a compooper all by hisself?

Uh... uh... I guess not.

Come on, guys.

We gots to get him out.

[ giggling]

[ cooing]

[ cooing emitting]

Dil, I hear you!

It's me, Tommy.

How do I get you
out of there, Dil?

Dil:
Pee-pee.

Pee-pee? Now?

Okay.

No, Philip.

I think he means P
like in the alphabetty song.

You know...
♪ A, Z, T, P, D, L, E...

Maybe it's one of these.

Your brother's real smart
to know his alphabetties.

Yeah, too bad
we'll never see him again.

LIL:
Oh, no!
Look at him now!

Hey, let me try.

[ Lil squeals]

Okay, I'm done now.

I know what'll make Dilly happy.

Let's put a diapie on him.

Hey, he can have
my dirty one.

I think he wants
a clean one better.

Don't touch.

[ meowing and barking]

Spike, leave
that poor cat alone!

Ooh, look who's in here.

It's Grandpa.

Hey, what kind of getup is that?

Like it?

I've always had a knack
for catchy outfits.

Zoom!

Zoom!

[ Dil giggles]

Here, Tommy,
I got the diapie

and a bunch
of other stuff.

He needs this
so he won't get a rash.

[ squirts]

We gots to rub it in.

[ humming]

He's still
not moving much.

KIMMIE:
Maybe he's cold.

Yeah, my daddy always says

his compooper freezes up.

Let's put his jammies on him.

And knowing Dil,
he's probably hungry.

Yeah. Hmm...

Okay, Phil and Lil,
you put his jammies on

while the rest of us get Dil
something to eat.

Okay.

We will.

Why can't his jambies
get on?

[ crash]

Whoops!

Now he's on his head.

Hey, that looks
like fun.

Yeah.

Mind taking over
for a few minutes?

I just can't feel
my arms anymore.

No problem.

Dilly, let me tell you
about the first time

I caught shrapnel
in WW II...

[ cat meowing and dog barking]

Oh, poor thing.

Your grandma's talking
to a tree again.

No, she's not.

She's talking about Dil.

Who's going to rescue him?

We are.

Sorry, he fell on his head
when we dresseded him.

Hey, Dilly, we brought
you some yummies.

I guess he's not
so hungry after all.

Don't worry, Dil.

I'm going to get you out
no matter what.

Maybe he'll just crawl out.

Somebody said compoopers
have windows.

[ punching keys;
electronic whirring]

It's Dil, Tommy.

You gotted him out!

Isn't he kind of--
I don't know--

flat?

Dil, I'm sorry
about what I said.

LIL:
He still isn't
moving much.

Maybe he wants to play.

Yeah, then he might
feel better.

Let's build these blocks
so's he can knock them down.

Okay, Dil, go get it.

Here.

Is that better?

Ooh.

I know!

Hey, Dil, hit me on the head.

Let's put him back
inside that compooper.

At least he talked then.

Good idea, Chuckie.

LIL:
He's back.

Hey, Dil, it's me, Tommy.

Can you hear me?

Say something.

COMPUTER VOICE:
Do you want help?

ALL:
Yeah!

What happened to Dil's voice?

What's wrong with you babies?

That's not Dil talking;
that's the compooper.

Oh, Angelica,
what do we do?

Dil's not acting right.

He won't even eat.

Well, he should.

Why do you think
compoopers have menus?

If Dil won't eat, I just
don't know what'll happen.

[ sighs]

Come on, Dil.

Please try and eat.

Maybe there's a button
to help him chew.

COMPUTER VOICE:
Delete.

Yeah, "Dil eat."

I'll make him eat.

[ crash]

My brother!

I'll never wish anyone
away again!

COMPUTER VOICE:
Do you want to send?

Yes, please!

Send Dil back to us!

[ computer sounds off]

Where is he?

Where did he get sended?

I know!

What's his favoritest place?

Maybe he's there.

Um...

His favoritest place
is his room.

Let's go see.

[ giggling]

Look, he's back!

And asides from his arms
in his pants

and his feets in his shirt
and stuff

he's perfect!

ALL:
Yeah, Dil!

Ow!

Oh, that felt good, Dil.

Do it again.

[ Dil grunting]

[ all laugh]

[ chuckling]

Those babies are
in so much trouble.

[ Stu shrieks]

STU [ screams]:
Angelica!

[ babbling]

[ giggling]

Smells like someone's making
a yummy mess-cipe.

[ stomach rumbling]

Mm, my tummy is talking.

Tommy's mommy
makes a pie.

I want to see.
Give me a booster.

[ giggling]

Uh-oh...

[ splats]

Uh-oh, bye-bye pie.

Oh, now what are we
supposed to do?

I know, we can
make a new pie.

But I don't know how.

We do; me and Lil make
yummy pies all the time.

We'll teach you.

Yeah, you sit here

and we'll go
get some gredients.

These ants look pretty gredie.

[ giggles then clears throat]

Ladies and gentlemen

today a yummy-licious
recipe for you.

It is called
"ant-wormies mud pie."

The firstest thing
you gots to do
is get lotsof mud.

Look at!

Who's this little guy?

I don't know,
but throw him in.

Now we add
the gredients.

And it wouldn't
be a wormy pie

if we didn't have lots
and lots of juicy wormies.

Okay, now
we got to add

the special secret flavoring
like mommy does.

[ gasps]

What's that?

It's a secret
flavoring... remember?

Here, sprinkle some
chopped up grasses on top.

Uh, uh, uh, just
a minute, bossy boots

still gots to put in
one more thing

of where we can add
finishing touches.

Oh...

Ta-dah!

Ant-wormies mud pie!

Aren't you
supposed to put

a crusty on top?

We don't gots a crusty.

PHIL:
Oh, Lil, this
is our bestest pie ever!

Now can I day "ta-dah"?

Okay.

Ta-dah!

You guys, we got to put
the new pie back

before Tommy's mommy comes back.

I'll do it.

Come on, let's build
some sandy castles.

Hmm... smells great.

I think I'll help myself
to a nice, big slice.

[ squishing]

ANGELICA:
Mommy?

Not now, Angelica, I'm frosting.

Mmm... sure looks yummy.

Uh, uh, uh--
it took me all morning

to get those frosting
flowers just right

and I don't have time...

I've got
a conference call

then a lunch meeting
then my teeth cleaning.

There's the dry cleaning.

I just don't have
the time to go on and...

I'll have to get back
to you, doctor.

Angelica!

[ gasps]

Hi, mommy.

Did you eat
that whole cake?

Uh...

Well... I did want
you to wait--

I guess it's okay.

I'll just bake another one.

Huh?

Hiya babies!

Listen to this:

My mommy let me

eat a whole, entire cake

all by myself!

You can't eat
the whole, entire cake.

Well, I did.

And my tummy's not even full.

Wow, Angelica,
if you're that hungry

you should eat my cookie.

I should?

Yeah, I should.

Here, you
can have mine.

And mine, too.

CHARLOTTE:
Angelica!

I'd like to see you
inside, please!

Uh-oh.

Mommy, is this
about the cookies?

I didn't took 'em or nothin',
they gave them to me!

Well, of course
they did, sweetie.

That's because
you're special.

In fact,
you're so special

you are a contestant

in the "Super Special Kids
Talent Show"!

I am?

I can't believe it.

Who am I kidding?

I amsuper, I amspecial.

And let's face it,
I am definitely talented.

[ humming a tune]

[ cell phone ringing]

Oh, Jonathan,
I'm so glad you called.

[ sighs]

Hold my meetings,
cancel the teeth cleaning.

I'm talking the day off
with my daughter.

Wow, first the cake,
now the talent show.

This is the bestest day
of my life!

And the winner of this year's
Super Special Kids Talent Show

is... not
Suzy Carmichael, but...

Miss Angelica Pickles!

[ cheering]

As the most super special
talented kid

Miss Pickles will receive
a shopping spree...

At Grammy Gingersnap's
Sweet Shoppe!

[ Angelica chuckling]

You like me,
you really like me!

[ cheering]

Out of my way-- super special
talented kid coming through!

[ cheering continuing]

Wow!

Yummy!

Well, aren't you just the most
scrumptious, little sweetums?

Yeah, yeah, lady,
Where do you keep

those chocolaty
marshmallows?

[ gasps]

I guess things really do happen
to good people.

GRAMMY:
Would you
share the candy

with your friends?

Oh, all right.

[ cheering]

You've got
a lot of spunk, kid.

[ mumbles]

I haven't met anyone

with a sweet tooth
like you

since, uh... oh, me!

[ chuckles]

Angelica...

I want you to have this...
all of it.

[ gasping]:
Huh?

I ownthe candy shop?

No... you own my entire
multi-national corporation!

ANGELICA:
I want my poster

to be on the wall!

It's good
for workers' choral.

Yes, ma'am!

Kimmie, do you
see anything wrong

with this pen?

It looks okay to me.

Where's my face?

My face is supposed
to be on everything!

Especially pens.

How do you like
your new job, mommy?

The only thing better
than corporate domination

is corporate domination

with my
number-one girl!

Just what
do you lame babies

think you're doing
to my stickers?!

[ screaming]:
My head isn't
big enough!

[ machinery whirring]

[ rattling]

And put my name bigger
on the "Angelica" home game!

And, Kimmie,
I want to make

an Angelica CD

so people can listen
to my beautiful voice

every second
of every day.

[ shrilly]:
♪ Angelica!

She's a genius.

Faster,
everybody, faster!

We've got to fill
the world with more me!

[ machinery rumbling]

Hey, what's wrong
with this dumb thing?

[ rumbling increasing]

ANGELICA:
Get me maintenance!

Machine broke, stuck on !

Hey, Angelica, please
make these things stop.

It's because we're all scared.

This place is filling up
with Angelica dollies!

And I gots a diaper rash.

Somebody turn
this thing off!

We can't, we're doomed.

And it's all 'cause you ate
that chocolate cake!

I just wanted to make
the world a better...

CHARLOTTE:
Angelica?

...Place.

Huh, mom, I'm sorry

the cake...

Doesn't it
look delicious?

Huh?

How about a yummy slice

of mommy's delicious
chocolaty cake?

[ moans]

It starts with the cake...

and then it's babies...
and factories...

and faces on the pens!

[ screaming]:
No!