01x05 - The First Regency

[bunniefuu]

Previously
on The Serpent Queen...

Does Mary have a claim
to the throne?

Fifteen years had passed.

Mary had been with us
on account

of her betrothal
to our eldest son.

Ruggieri had disappeared
from my life.

Montmorency had not been seen
for many years.

You know Antoinette of Guise?

She's returned to the courts

since the untimely death
of her husband.

My dear cousins have taken

to seizing the homes
of prominent Protestants.

Colonel Guise has now claimed
Chenonceau for himself.

Surely we could discover
some utility in each other.

Thought you two
were done with each other.

Gold can poison the mind,

but just enough
will preserve your youth.

When you are king,

you will put Catherine
on your Privy Council.

Lead a garrison of men
to the border.

Will that suffice?

I give you your king.

You have a message
from the Holy Roman emperor.

You're quiet today.

The letter you saw me receive
last night contains evidence

that Queen Mary
is conspiring with her cousin,

Queen Elizabeth of England,
against me.

But I thought
they hated each other.

Well, apparently,
the only thing they hate

more than each other
is the thought of me,

a commoner,
on a throne of Europe.

There may be
more correspondence

hidden within Mary's rooms.

I would search for them myself,
but it would raise suspicion.

Perhaps you could help me.

You want me to search
Mary's rooms for you?

I would not ask if the
situation were not so grave.

There's a man watching us.

Where?

There, in the trees.

I don't see anyone.

No, I'm sure I saw him.

The forest
is full of creatures.

Perhaps you mistook one.

All I ask is that
you consider my request.

The fate of the country
hangs in the balance,

not to mention my own.

And yours.

Our fates are intertwined.

Now,
should I continue my story?

Though the death
of King Francis

had made me queen,

it was in name only.

Your Majesty, would you like me
to have breakfast brought?

Are you all right?

See this?

It's a pair of Cs,
for Catherine.

With an H overlaid for Henry.

It's romantic, no?

But if you look at it this way,

the Cs become a D, for Diane.

I would not be so disrespected
if Ruggieri were here.

He's the only one,

the only one
who never underestimated me.

Because he tells you
what you want to hear.

It's his only real talent.

Perhaps.

And perhaps I became pregnant
by some coincidence.

And perhaps you lost yours
the same way.

It doesn't matter.

That man asks too much
for what he gives in return.

Not if it's worth it.

I'd like to be alone
with the queen.

Turns out you were right
about the Holy Roman emperor.

The garrison wasn't enough
to dissuade his aggression.

You were right about that too.

I will ride out at the head
of my troops

tomorrow morning.

May God protect you.

I'll need someone to run things
while I'm away.

Wouldn't require much, just...

someone to keep an eye
on the functions of government,

so I've decided
to make you regent.

But Antoine of Bourbon
is rightfully regent.

Mm. If you follow
the rules of succession, yes,

but I'd rather it was you.

And I have the power
to make these decisions, so...

you will have the highest
authority in the land.

Just till I'm back.

Because I know I can trust you.

He was right.

He could trust me to be regent.

Even if he couldn't love me
as a wife.

You asked for me, madam?

I need more.

As you wish.

Leave the bottle.

I told you, too much
can drive a person mad.

Made my father
do unspeakable things.

To you?

Till I made him stop, that is.

You know how to look
after yourself.

I admire that.

Yes, and that's why
I have to stop coming here.

Oh?

The Queen might discover
our relationship.

Her punishment would be severe.

Mm.

You must pick a horse.

There can only be one winner.

I did not make the rules.

In fact, I despise them.

But they are what they are.

Nothing personal.

Twice a day, no more.

Hmm.

I'm very grateful.

I will need more gold

if I am
to continue supplying you.

I can get you more
whenever you need.

Together, we could accomplish
great things, Angelica.

Thank you for agreeing
to be regent.

Yes, very good of you
to, uh...step in.

Come back to us.

I'll do my utmost.

I want you
to put aside your differences

and I want you to serve your
regent while I am at w*r, yes?

We remain
your faithful servants.

Good.

- c**t.
- Cock.

- Kiddie-fiddler.
- Pig-fucker.

Oh, grow up.

Thank you.

It'll be you going to w*r next.

M-Ma-Mary says
I should focus on my strengths.

And what does Mary say
that those are?

The-the study of scriptures.

Mm. Like most who suffer
from physical afflictions,

Francis is very close to God.

What others see as weakness,
I see only as strength.

Your Majesty.

Well, that can be no bad thing.

Show our enemies no mercy,
Father.

We will pray for you.

Ah.

Diane, what are you doing?

I have decided I shall
accompany you to the front

and bring you luck.

Diane--

I can outride most of your men.

Would you have me sit and pine
when I can be useful?

I only hope
the Duke of Guise can keep up.

I certainly intend to try.

Very well.

Can I ask you something,
brother?

Of course, brother.

Why the f*ck did you agree

to surrender your regency
to Catherine

while the king is away?

Well, the king asked me.

What was I supposed to do?

You were supposed to say no.

I didn't care
that my husband took Diane

to battle with him.

With any luck,
they would be captured,

held for ransom
that I would be slow to pay.

All that mattered was that
it was my time to govern.

Regent of all France.

Not bad for a commoner.

Look, the Holy Roman emperor,

his battalion
is much larger than ours.

Our only advantage
is geography.

We should take them by
surprise, approach from

-the ridge before daybreak...
-Yeah?

And drive them into the forest.

Yes, they wouldn't expect it.

If you were to send
half your men on foot

into the dark of the forest

and then make the approach
from above a feint,

they would still react
as if it's not

and they would
do as you say, no?

Yes, if our riders made a hell
of a noise on the way down,

then there they would meet our
men in ditches that we've dug.

Waiting to cut the enemy
to pieces.

Exactly.

Just like madam said.

Excellent plan, Your Majesty.

Montmorency would be proud.

Yeah, well, it's
what he taught us, isn't it?

Anticipate an enemy's reaction
and use it.

Mm.

Didn't think
you were paying attention.

Always.

Are you the queen's dressmaker?

What's it to you?

I'm hungry.

So go to the kitchen.

I worked as an apprentice
for a dressmaker.

Perhaps I could work for you.

All I want is a place to sleep.

I don't need any help.

Now f*ck off.

Catherine asked for you.

Did she?

You're never where you say
you're going to be these days.

I've been busy.

What's that you've got
in your hand there?

Nothing.

Nothing?

Show me.

It's a present for you,
actually.

Now you've spoiled
the surprise.

You told them I requested
a Privy Council meeting?

Of course.

Where are you going?

The regent's
called a Privy Council meeting.

You mean
the merchant's daughter?

A Guise does not come when
called by someone like that.

Or are you her dog?

Okay, Mother.

What would you want me to do?

As I am a member
of the king's Privy Council.

Yes, the king's Privy Council.

Make her come to you.

Tell her I'm indisposed.

Privy Council meeting.

Sit down, Antoine.

Is the cardinal going?

He has been called.

That doesn't mean he's going.

Find out.

We're not gonna sit there
like a big pair of tits,

waiting for him.

No. He'd just love that,
wouldn't he?

Yes, because then
we would look weak,

and we would not get
what we want.

Right. Of course.

And-and-and what is it
we want, exactly?

To finish our meal
without being burdened

by the whims of someone
who shouldn't be regent.

Right.

It's just that...

well, it-it all seems
a bit pointless

when we might
actually help govern.

Pointless or not, it's the
family business, Antoine.

If you don't like it,
you can always

go and help Father
tend to Mother's gardens.

I knew I would be tested,

but I had no idea
it was going to be so soon.

Ah, Your Majesty.

Have you, uh,

have you come for confession?

I have nothing to confess.

Please.

I missed you
at the Privy Council meeting.

Yes, a member
of my, uh, flock was in need.

I've had a message
from the king.

He will need more funds
if he is to keep fighting.

I'm afraid you're-you're
showing your inexperience.

The Privy Council
can't give you what you need.

For that, you have to go
to the treasury.

Oh.

Thank you.

You will, however,

find the treasury empty.

Well, how can it be empty?

Your Majesty, have you not seen

how these frugal Protestants
spend money?

Of course, you could go
to Parlement to request funds,

but unfortunately the majority

are not made up
with the nobility or clergy

but of the mercantile class.

You should get along
with them well.

Meaning?

Just that you are so likable.

Not what she meant.

So how do you propose
I win their support?

The Third Estate is divided
evenly between Catholics,

who will always vote
the way I tell them,

and members of the new religion
of whom you can expect

nothing but backstabbing
and disloyalty.

Can I count on you
for your support?

That depends on what
you're willing to do for me.

There are certain properties
currently in Protestant hands

that I believe
would be better off

under the curation
of the Catholic Church.

Your own brother
is in harm's way,

and yet you are haggling.

We don't worry about Francois.

Francois
can look after himself.

He always has done.
Isn't that right, Mother?

I have never condoned
special treatment

for either of my boys.

The country must come first.

I admire your patriotism.

There is no higher purpose.

Except my line.

God, of course.

I'm willing
to put up the money,

but I need protection
from that f*cking cardinal

and his brother.

I'm not building those ships

to have them taken off me
by a grown man in a skirt.

Show me
the, uh, sketches again?

Ah.

Mm. Yeah.

Fascinating.
Isn't it, Antoine?

-What?
-These.

Yes, absolutely.

And, in return,
what could we expect?

25% of the profits.

-Make it fifty.
-Fifty?

You have come to us
for protection.

It comes at a cost.

You're just as bad
as the others.

Ah, Your Majesty.

Your Majesty,
may I present Pierre Marques.

It's an honor.

I hope I'm not interrupting.

No, actually,
we were just leaving.

We'll be in touch.

Your Majesty.

So, so sorry
we couldn't make it

to the Privy Council meeting.

There's just...so much
going on at the moment.

-Right, Antoine?
-Hmm?

Uh, yes, of course.
It's-it's exhausting, really.

-Endless. Go, go, go.
-Mm.

I presume you know
why I'm here.

The w*r. I heard.
Terrible business.

Obviously, we'd love to help
rally Protestant support,

but more contributions
to the treasury at this point,

well, it's a bitter pill
to swallow.

I mean, that man you just met
had his home taken from him

for no other reason
than being a Protestant.

On the other hand, I may
be able to deliver the votes

if you were to make a...
gesture in return.

What sort of gesture?

I think having a member
of the Catholic clergy

on the Privy Council
is a little...

outdated, don't you?

You would have me
remove Cardinal Guise

from the Privy Council?

It would be a start.

Protestants are not interested

in these old grievances
and wars.

They are for hard work
and making money.

As am I.

Are you?

Trading on your
inherited status at every turn

seems a more accurate
description of your agenda

to me.

Ah, it's a fair point.

Drop your cocks,
grab your socks.

Time to go
and k*ll some Spaniards.

Charming.

Still raining.

Is it now?

We can't wait any longer.

Good a day to die as any.

All right.

His Majesty does not
intend to fight, I hope.

Of course.
I'm their leader.

I will ride into battle
at the head of my men.

You're more than that.
You're the king.

What will become
of the French people

if something happens to you?

Diane, my father led
from the front.

Forgive me, but your father
was not the intellect you are.

I loved him as you did, but...

the duke will agree
he was not a strategist.

When he was captured
a-at Pavia,

he left you and your brother
in his stead.

Do you think your son
would survive such a fate?

I would never, never subject
my son to anything like that.

Of course not.

But you said
you wanted to learn

from your father's mistakes.

Bloodying your sword is not
what makes you a great king.

Diane.

-w*r is not a game...
-Diane...

in which to prove yourself.

Now men's lives are at stake.

I don't ask you to think of me.

I don't ask you to think
of what would become of me

if something happens to you.

I ask you to think of France.

Francois.

What do you think?

I think madam
sees the situation clearly.

I shall ride into battle,
carrying your colors proudly.

He thinks I'm a coward!

To be a great king,

you must be willing
to make decisions

that are not popular
nor flattering.

Francois would never be capable
of such sacrifice.

He will never be
a leader of men.

Only you have that wisdom.

I knew I wouldn't get any help

from the Guises
or the Bourbons,

so I would have
to find another way.

I don't know why I ever agreed
to join Parlement.

No good ever comes of it.

Well, there's always
a first time, isn't there?

From what I understand,
the regent is her own woman.

No one is their own anything.

Least of all a woman.

You have done well...

displayed a subtlety
of understanding

for the whims of court
that were lost on your father.

M-mother...

...has it ever occurred to you

that your constant
underestimation of the man

may have just, you know,
sapped his confidence?

And if you just
loved him properly,

he-he might've done more.

No.

The truth is, he was a dullard.

Poor man.

You, on the other hand,

appear to take after
my side of the family.

I'm almost proud of you.

Do you think
she'll really go for it?

-What choice does she have?
-She's the queen.

Far as I can tell,
she has infinite choices.

Do you really think she wants
to explain to the king

why she failed to send him
what he needed to win?

She's already been replaced
in the bedroom.

'Course not.

To understand people,

you must know their desires
and their fears.

That way
you have leverage, Antoine.

That's how the world works.

They're ready for you.

I stand before you today

because our beloved France

is at w*r.

At this very moment,

King Henri and his soldiers

are risking their lives

fighting
for French sovereignty.

In order to succeed,

they will need food,

weapons, horses,

and armor--

all of which cost money.

To the Catholic members,

let it be known

the Crown has always
appreciated your loyalty.

To the Protestant members
of the body,

there is no reason

you should not be free
to prosper.

No one should take from you

what you alone have built.

In return for your support,

a representative
of your choosing

will be granted a private
audience with the king,

during which time

you will be free
to air your grievances

without middlemen

getting in the way for profit.

It is the king's desire

to make tolerance
the law of the land.

This is what resides
in the king's heart.

And if you knew him

the way that I know him--

his generosity,

his kindness,

his loyalty--

you would have no choice

but to answer
your sovereign's call

at France's hour of need.

The m*llitary shall have
our support, Your Majesty,

in return for the king's ear.

Oh, f*ck.

People

only ever want to be heard.

She's a natural,
wouldn't you say?

She's a f*cking problem
is what she is, Antoine.

She just won the Protestants'
support without our help

and without giving us
anything in return.

Do you know what that makes us?

Assholes?

Precisely.

-You came home.
-I did, thanks to you.

Diane.

I'm glad you're safe.

Now, any trouble
while I was away?

Nothing important.

Brother, no new holes in you,
I trust?

- None that I've noticed.
- Please.

In honor of your victory, Duke.

Thank you, my child.

Why don't you present them
to our king?

No, no.

No.

No, you should celebrate
your-your triumph, Francois.

That was your triumph,
Your Majesty.

Your strategy.
Well, yours and...madam's.

Francis.

Why did your father
fight the Holy Roman emperor?

I-I already told you.
For the sovereignty of France.

Yes, but...they worship
the same God.

Would-wouldn't
it have been better

if they'd just joined forces
and fought those who do not?

My father knows best.

Yes.
Of course he does.

-Gentle, for f*ck's sake.
-Listen to you.

Riding around the place,

fighting with anyone
you can get your hands on.

Truth is,
you're a f*cking baby.

After you finish
washing my ass,

I'll get up and teach you
how to speak to your betters.

Yeah? I'd like to see you try.

Hello, Mother.
I'll be out in a minute.

No rush.

Hope I'm not interrupting.

Of course not.

The more, the merrier.

So, did you bring me a present?

I was gonna get you
a buxom Belgian maid

to comfort you in
your long nights of the soul,

and then I remembered
you took a vow of celibacy.

Mm, more of a suggestion
than a vow, actually.

And guess what.

If I decide to break it,

I can forgive myself.

No, your brother
has been far too busy

for dark nights of the soul
while you've been gone.

Isn't that right, Charles?

You may go.

No, he's nearly finished.

Oh, I can bathe my own son,
can't I?

No, your brother has been

letting himself
be outmaneuvered

by that slow-moving dolt
married to the king

while you managed
to carry the king's colors

onto the b*ttlefield

while he watched
from the sidelines.

With help from Diane.

Yes, well,
she will regret that.

Maybe Catherine is the one
we should watch.

Okay.

Is this really necessary?

Oh, I'm sorry.

Am I being unfair?

Have I said something untrue?

The queen wanted
something from you,

and instead
of extracting a price,

you let her go around you.

Now, hmm,
what does that make you?

Go on. Say it.

It makes you...

Irrelevant.

Precisely.

Not like your big,
strong brother.

Why do you do that to him?

You know he doesn't like it.

Oh, well, that's his problem.

He's always been
so straightforward.

Not like you
in your pretty little skirts.

Yet I did not choose this.

Shame.

Would you like to have a little
cry over how unfair life can be?

You know,
there's two schools of thought

when it comes to parenting.

One is to love your child
unconditionally

so they suffer the delusion
the world will do the same.

The other is to break them

before the world
does it more cruelly.

And I wonder what school
of thought you fall into.

I simply prepared you both
for life as it is,

not as a mother wishes it were.

You need to make
yourself essential

to the governing
of this country.

And how do you propose
I do that?

You don't know?

You have the piece
already in your hand.

Your niece, Mary Stuart,

thinks she's on a mission
from God.

You can't buy that sort of
singularity of purpose.

All you need to do

is make yourself a conduit
to her calling,

and she will
give you the throne.

The king has asked
not to be disturbed.

Not by me.

By anyone, madam.

He said so?

Quite specifically.

I see.

Oh.

Oh?

Is that
how you greet your king?

Your Highness.

I'll tell the queen
you are here.

Yes, you do that.

-Good morning.
-Good morning.

Would you be so kind
as to go for a ride with me?

You.

I have a job for you.

-What?
-I want you to follow someone.

Ahh...

Another.

-No.
-No?

You take too much.

You have no idea.

I know where you were.

Ah, are you jealous?

You know
what Catherine would say.

I don't care
what Catherine would say.

You have to pick a horse.

After all, it's not personal.

Those two will cut
right through you

to get at each other.

Yeah, at least
Diane's honest about it.

Do you want to know
what I think?

I think you know
there's some...

small possibility
that you might be loved by me.

And so you will do everything

to make sure it isn't so.

Well, someone once told me

if you love something in this
world, you can never be free.

So, I think
I'll take gold over love.

Then you'll want this back.

It's beautiful, isn't it?

This is the house the Guises
stole off some Protestant, eh?

I met the man.

Well, it's mine now,
apparently.

A gift.

A gift to curry favor
with the new king.

What do you think I should do?

Accept?

Let it be known
that I'm easily bought?

Or turn it down at the risk
of the Guises'...

ire?

You'll make the right decision.

Perhaps.

I think you've always seen
something in me that I...

have trouble
really believing exists.

The same as Diane.

Can I ask you a question?

Is it too late for us?

It is never too late.

Again...I believed
he could love me.

When I was in the front,
playing the part of a...

a toy soldier

wrapped in cotton,

you...were a real regent.

I want you to have it.

In gratitude for what you did.

I don't need inducements.

But I do have
a small favor to ask.

You kept your word.

What else do I have?

I'm impressed.

And I'm free to speak my mind?

You are.

My family came up
the same as yours.

Through hard work and trade.

You can trust me.

Finally secure in my position,

I wanted
to lend a helping hand

to someone
in more need than I.

Your Majesty,

congratulations
on your victory.

I understand we have a lot
to thank you for.

Your loyalty
will not go unnoticed.

We only have your wife
to thank for that.

She makes
a persuasive argument.

She does indeed.

I believe you have something
you'd like to say to me?

I do.

I began life
as a tailor's apprentice.

Didn't have any schooling.

I worked my way up
until I owned the business.

I never asked anything
from anyone.

But every time

I have two pennies
to rub together,

one of my betters takes them.

Just like they took my home.

Now, they say it's because
I worship the wrong God.

It's not.

It's because I'm common.

And when I go to those who
are supposed to be my allies,

they take from me as well.

Because...I'm common.

I should remind you
who you are addressing.

I know I'm uncouth,

but you need to hear this,

because if free men can't make
their way in this country,

mark my words, sooner or later,
they'll come for you.

For all of you.

And they'll put all your
pretty little heads on spikes.

You know it as well as I do.

You're only hoping it
doesn't happen on your watch.

Because you can
put on your show

with your rituals
and your finery,

but you know
it won't last forever.

Sooner or later,
they'll catch on

and see that you're no
different than the rest of us!

How dare you!

The king grants you an audience
and you come with threats?

Oh, pshh, a warning.

- Not threats.
- It's all right.

- It's all right.
- No, it's not.

No, it's not!

If your father could see you
show such weakness,

he would be ashamed!

A tailor who thinks he can
speak his mind to the king?

I should have you whipped,

and then perhaps
you will remember your place!

Who are you
to tell me of my place?

The king's mistress
is supposed to be invisible,

seen and not heard.

But you, you-you prance around

without even a sense
to be ashamed of yourself!

The way you carried on
at the coronation?

Did you think
they were cheering you?

They were laughing!

- That's enough.
- At both of you!

A king who doesn't fight
with his men?

- I said that's enough!
- Because he'd rather

-be f*cking his whore!
-He is your king!

Chosen by God!

That makes me God's choice!

Or God's whore, if you like!

No God of mine.

Now, if you'll excuse me...

...I think I've had enough.

Quickly, quickly!

Forgive me.

I did it for you.

It needed to be done.

You're my king.

Of course.

Of course.
Of course.

Of course.

You are forgiven.

You are-you are forgiven.
You are forgiven.

I attempted to find refuge

from the turmoil at court
at Chenonceau,

the house that started it all.

Hello, cousin.

Cousin.

Henri and I have decided

we shall make Chenonceau
our country home

instead of Chaumont.

Charming, isn't it?

Who will rid me of this woman?

You look familiar.

I hear you tell fortunes.

It's a cheap trick, really.

Tell mine.

Ah.

In a few hours,
you'll be sh*t-faced.

More sh*t-faced
than you already are.

You'll probably get
in a fight,

but you can handle yourself,
so you'll be all right.

Today, that is.

'Cause you'll get older.

And you'll get slower.

And, eventually,
you'll end up dead in a ditch.

Pig food.

Like me.

Despite the fact

that you gave your whole life

to a king and a way of life

that never gave a f*ck
about you in the first place.

It's no trick.

Turns out,
you are a fortune teller.

You all right, son?

I'm fine.

Can I be of any help to you?

I said I'm fine.

Perhaps a place
offered for the night.

Protection.

You are offering your charity?

It is a Christian thing to do.

How much for the girl?

She is my daughter.

So? How much?

You insult me.

That enough?

Let me talk to her.

She's young, but she can learn.

She'll make a good wife
eventually.

What sort of man sells
his own daughter, huh?

It's misunderstood--

I-I didn't misunderstand.

Now, I'd like to think
she's not your flesh and blood.

I'd like to think
you found her along the way

and you've been passing her off
as your own,

but the world is not
as I'd like it to be, is it?

So tell me, how does it feel

to know that in a moment's time

when you cease to exist,
no one will object,

no one will mourn,
no one will even notice?

-I beg you.
-Oh, don't bother.

I've k*lled for the king.
I've k*lled for money.

Neither has brought me
as much pleasure

as k*lling
out of sheer distaste.

Spare him!

He's not worth
the air he breathes.

I don't disagree.

But he is my father.

Is that what you want?

It is not all I want.

I'm not in the business
of granting wishes.

I want you to take me with you.

I don't even know
where I'm going.

I know.

As I look back,

one danger
only prepared me for the next.

I will do as you ask.

I'll search Mary's chambers
for you.

You are a true friend.

After all, one must be a fox

to find the snares

and a lion
to frighten the wolves.

Oh.

My dear mother-in-law,

I heard you wished
to take a walk with me?

Yes.

It's a small matter
of scripture

that I would like to share.

It's a passage
that is helping me

through my own grief
over King Francis' death.

How thoughtful.

"You will grieve,

"but your grief
will become joy.

"But you shall lament and weep

"that the world shall rejoice

"and you shall
be made sorrowful.

Your sorrow shall
be turned into joy."

Yes. John.

Chapter 16, verse 20.

Precisely.

I see why you think
that would be a comfort for me.

My dear, you look cold.

I'm fine.

Nonsense.

Go fetch your mistress a shawl.

What the f*ck
do you think you're doing?

Yeah, yeah.